Gift of Chaos

by daOtterGuy

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Discord, Slice of Life
Length: 1615

Discord gets Rainbow a gift. Rainbow wishes he wouldn't.

Discord gets Rainbow a gift. Rainbow wishes he wouldn't.

Written for Roundabout Recluse for Jinglemas 2021

Published 2021-12-28 04:20:00 UTC
Last updated 2021-12-28 04:20:00 UTC

Gift of Chaos

Rainbow Dash woke up with a wild grin on her face. She bounded out of bed and raced into her living room. Spread out before her under her cloud based Hearth’s Warming tree was a myriad of presents.

They were all of different sizes, shapes, and colours. A massive load for one pegasus due in part to a close group of friends, generous fans, her fellow Wonderbolts, and from students that she had managed to inspire at the school of friendship.

She humoured the idea of breakfast, but knew her impatience would never keep through the downing of eggnog and waffles that she had every Hearth’s Warming morning.

Scanning the spread of gifts, she spied a few obvious gifters among the stacks. New tank decorations for tank from Fluttershy, a cider jug shaped package from Applejack — the only cider ever made from Zap Apples and Rainbow’s special gift — and the poorly wrapped monstrosity of no discernible shape in the back that was definitely from Soarin who still hadn’t managed to perfect the art of basic wrapping skills.

Her eyes eventually laid upon a truly strange package near the front of the pack. It was small, about the size of Tank, and wrapped in bright leopard print patterned wrapping paper — something she only knew due to a recent adventure with Daring Do. A black bow was attached to the very top and what looked to be a tag poking out underneath.

Approaching the package with hesitant steps, she grabbed it in her hooves and shook it lightly. Nothing. Pressing it up to her ear, she noted no sound was produced either. She sniffed it, but only the smell of paper filled her nose.

Flipping over the tag, she read the words “To: Rainbow Dash; From: Secret~”.

Frowning, Rainbow did another once over, twisting it this way and that, as she attempted to discover who the gifter was or the nature of the contents.

The package was suspicious… but, on the other hoof, it was a present to her.

Curiosity winning out over caution, she ripped the paper off the top and yanked the box flaps open. Inside was the grinning face of Discord.

“Surprise!” he cried out.

Rainbow screamed and dropped the box to the floor as she scrambled backwards into her couch. Meanwhile, Discord unrolled himself from the box taking on a strange two dimensional shape. He blew on his thumb and inflated himself into a 3D shape.

He raised his arms jubilantly. “Merry Hearth’s Warming!”

“What are you doing in my house?!” Rainbow shrieked as she stumbled over her couch, landing backwards on her rump.

“To give you a gift, of course!” Discord happily replied. “‘Tis the season and all that.” He waved a claw.

Discord frowned as he noticed Rainbow’s face twisted into apprehension.

“Oh, come now, you ponies are all about presents!” He gestured towards the spread under her tree. “Why wouldn’t you want a present from your dear friend—”

“Dear friend?!” Rainbow yelled angrily. “Are you kidding me? All you ever do is cause us trouble!”

Discord tsked. “Now, now. Is that anyway to talk to a beloved companion?”

“It is when that companion—” Rainbow hissed the last word “—only ever seems to cause me problems!”

“Oh, I’ve helped you plenty of times,” Discord said with a nonchalant wave of his hand.

“Name three.”

“Not important. Anyways, do you want your gift or not?” Discord snapped his claws conjuring a red Santa suit over his body with matching hat, white beard, and large sack over his shoulder. “It’s the season of giving,” he sang.

Rainbow scowled. “Fine, what is it?”

Discord presented the opened sack to Rainbow revealing a bag of miniature versions of himself laughing. “Getting to know me!”

He snapped his fingers causing the windows and doors to disappear along with his Santa getup as Rainbow attempted to fly through the front door. She skidded to a stop.

“Oh, come on,” he whined, “it will be great.”

“Nope!” She searched the room for another exit. “I’m out. Pretty sure this is going to go bad.”

“I assure you it will not.”

“I’m pretty sure you’re lying.” Rainbow tried to slam into a wall, but it wobbled like jelly and threw her backwards. She growled, “let me out Discord.”

“Not until I have a chance to give you my gift,” he replied petulantly. He sniffed as he upturned his nose. “Honestly, I’m starting to feel hurt over how you’re reacting to my sincere heartfelt present.”

Rainbow sighed in defeat. “Will you leave me alone if I just let you do this?”

“Cross my heart.” He smacked a black letter ‘x’ sticker over his chest.

“Fine, let’s get this over with,” Rainbow grumbled. She flopped onto her couch and affixed an unamused glare at Discord.

“Excellent, now my dear, dear Rainbow Dash.” His smile widened, toothy and sharp. “Why do you think I cause chaos?”

“Because you're a jerk?” Rainbow answered dully.

Discord frowned. “No.”

“Because you have nothing better to do?”

Discord growled. “Not even close.”

“Because you waste everyone’s time?”

“No!” Discord glared at Rainbow who smiled smugly back. He turned away, annoyed. “Why did I even ask you?”

“I don’t why you thought I would give you a good answer considering you locked me in my own house.”

“Details.” Discord waved a clawed hand and a nearby painting became nothing more than a mass of blurred coloured shapes. “It’s simply because I must!”

“Be a jerk?”

“Cause chaos!” Discord yelled back as he threw his hand up in the air. Literally. “Can you at least try to meet me halfway here, Dashie?”

“First, only Pinkie can call me that,” Rainbow grumped. “Second, so, what? You have to cause chaos? Couldn’t you like—” Rainbow waved a hoof “—take up baking or something?”

“Baking is hardly chaotic,” Discord said disgustedly as he conjured a screaming cupcake into his hand.

“Have you seen Pinkie bake?”

Discord snapped the cupcake up whole in his jaws and mulled over her words. “I suppose she would make an exception, but still no. I have to cause chaos.”

Rainbow rolled her eyes. “What? Does it keep you alive or something?”

“Not anymore than you flying.” Rainbow frowned. “Ah, I see where you don’t understand now. Allow me to reframe it for you.” Discord spread his hands out before him causing a wooden painting frame to appear around his head. “You like to fly, yes?”

“Try love it,” Rainbow scoffed. “It’s everything to me!”

“Yes, and would you be fine not flying?”

“What?! Of course not, it’s my whole life!”

“Would you not even be able to compromise on it?”

“No!”

“Even if you had no choice and were forced to stop flying because others were bothered by it?”

“No!” Rainbow flinched and looked sheepishly away. “I mean, I guess if it causes problems for others I could… try.”

“There, that’s it!” Discord exclaimed.

“What’s it?” Rainbow questioned.

“That’s how I feel about causing chaos.”

Rainbow blinked then her eyes widened in understanding. “Oh!” She cringed. “Oh.” She rubbed the back of her head with a wing. “Yeah, okay I see your point now, but!” Rainbow pointed an accusatory hoof at Discord. “When it comes down to it, if I had to choose between my friends and flight, I would choose my friends.”

“Even if you never flew again?” Discord released a flock of birds from his hands and caused them to fly through the walls of the house. “To never reach the skies? To never feel the wind under your wings? To potentially lose those wings?”

“Yes.” Rainbow affixed a steely glare to her face. “Without hesitation.”

“Then I suppose in that way we are very different.” Discord tapped a claw on his chin in thought. “Though, if I was being honest I can see more everyday the reason one would choose someone else.” He rotated his head 180 degrees. “But is it really good to have friends who limit you?”

“They don’t limit you, though,” Rainbow said, “they give you new opportunities, show possibilities you hadn’t thought of.” She grinned. “Even if you are the spirit of chaos.”

Discord righted his head. He cackled. “I suppose that is the case then isn’t it? But can you see it from my perspective? Someone who never allowed anyone to control him before? Someone who never had to care about the leash around his neck?”

“It’s only a leash if you let it.” Rainbow scowled. “But I see your point. It’s hard to adjust to having complete freedom to having to actually care about others.”

Discord nodded. “And now you understand me.”

Rainbow smiled begrudgingly. “Yeah, I guess I do. Are we done now?”

“Not quite.”

“Discord! Come—”

She was interrupted as Discord shoved a box of firecrackers, paintballs, and various prank equipment into her hooves.

“Your actual gift from me.” He grinned mischievously. “Since you seem to like causing as much chaos as I do.”

Rainbow looked confused before she also grinned widely with a predatory glint. “Oh, yeah. I can have some real fun with this.”

“Good and I don’t suppose…” Discord tapped his claws together “... you would be up to having a pranking partner in crime?”

Rainbow smirked. “Dunno, who’s asking?”

Discord looked askance. “... Me?”

“Sure, Discord. Drop in anytime. Thanks, and Merry Hearth’s Warming.”

He grinned widely. “You’re quite welcome, Dashie. Tata!”

With that Discord snapped his claw and disappeared.

Rainbow sat back with a contented smile. She looked around her house and her smile slowly melted into fury as she realized what was still missing.

“DISCORD! GIVE ME BACK MY DOORS AND WINDOWS!”