Author's Note

Sorry for the long wait, for a new chapter, I’ve been busy with tax season. Fun stuff.

Chapter 7

The Way of the Cowboy

Chapter 7

Wind…blowing through my hair, was the first thing I could feel, the same feeling one would feel when cruising down the highway with all the windows rolled down, on a late summer day. The next feeling I sensed was that I was gently swinging from side to side in a rhythmic steady pattern. A strange noise was coming from all around me. It made me think of pigeons flapping their wings. “Ugh…wha…ughwhats goin on?” I opened my eyes, and once my vision cleared I found myself looking up to the sky, but what I saw up in the sky directly above me had me a bit puzzled. About 15 feet above me was what looked like the underside of a white furred flying horse. ”Not the first thing I wanted to wake up and see,” I thought after noticing the flying horse's crown jewels bouncing around. The stallion was wearing a harness that was draped over his body, four straps were hanging off him and hung down to me and connected to a type of stretcher to which I was laying down on. I was fastened to the stretcher, unable to really move my body. As I was wiggling around a bit, I felt a literal pain on my ass. I quit moving and just layed there. “HEY! YOU!” I shouted up at my ride, The stallion craned his head down between his front legs to peer down at me, the stallion was one from the paramedic team. “YA YOU! WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON, AND WHY DOES IT FEEL LIKE I GOT MY ASS KICKED!” I shouted over the wind.

“Ty Thomson nicker nicker,” I heard a familiar femanine voice say to my right. I looked over to see Big White flying next to me, she had a look of concern on her face. She held out a hoof and lightly tapped my right shoulder.

“What the hell happened, why does my ass hurt, and where are Shay and Lyra?” I said loud enough for her to hear me over the wind. She tapped my shoulder again in a calming manner. “Damnit, she can’t understand me,” I thought. Then she surprised me by pointing a hoof behind her in the sky. What she pointed at was a pinkish hot air balloon, inside it was a collection of 5 ponies of various colors. Two I recognized as the Butter colored pegasus pony with light pink mane and tail, the second was the purple unicorn. The others consisted of an orangish colored pony with a yellow mane and tail, an all around pink pony with some crazy pink hair, and a white unicorn with a fancy looking purplish mane and tail. Next to Butter and Purple Unicorn I saw that my dogs were with them, Both Shay and Lyra had their heads popped up and looked in my direction. “At least they are safe,” I thought. Then I caught a glimpse of a sixth pegasus pony behind the balloon basket pushing. It was cerulean blue, with a rainbow mane and tail. I looked back to Big White then nodded my head. Looking to my left, I saw another three pegasus ponies, two were stallions in armor, and the other was a mare from the paramedic team. The mare was constantly flying right next to me, and checking my straps, and flying up to Mr. Ballsack, and checking the harness and connections to make sure everything was running smoothly. I tried to look at the ground , but the stretcher was limiting my field of vision. “How high am I off the ground?” I thought, The only ground I could see was the occasional high hill tops.

“Well where the hell are we going, Big White?” Big White again just tapped my shoulder gently with her hoof. I looked down my body as best I could, I still had my revolver strapped on, and I didn’t lose any of the 9 shells in the bandolier. My boots were still on, as were my spurs. Then I thought of one thing that I was missing. “MY HAT! WHERE THE HELL IS MY HAT?!” I yelled in my head. “Big White, Where's my Hat?” She looked at me with a puzzled look then nickered to the paramedic mare, and they had a short conversation between each other while Big White was pointing at my restraints. The paramedic nodded her head in agreement and reached down with her teeth and loosened the restraint that kept me from moving my arms. Once my arms were free she rechecked all my other straps to make sure I wouldn't fall off the stretcher. Big Whites horn then lit up, and a blue crayon and a small drawing pad appeared. She held both out to me, but only had half of each object glowing the same as her horn. I grabbed the side that wasn't glowing on both the drawing pad and crayon, and then she dropped them both. “Thanks Big White!” I thanked and nodded my head to her.

“Nicker wyhinny, Ty Thomson,” Big White replied with a nod of her own.

With crayon and drawing pad in my grasp I attempted to draw the best looking cowboy hat I could manage, while flying through the air. My first try was so atrocious that I abandoned it and flipped to a different page. My second attempt was much better, I Turned the pad to Big White, who looked at it and then back at me, then nodded her head. “NICKKER WhinNny!” she boomed, One of the armor wearing ponies flew to her side and she had a quick discussion with him and motioned to the hot air balloon. He saluted, then flew to the basket. In no time he was back with my hat gripped between his front hooves. He held it out for me to grab.

“Thanks good buddy,” and gave him a respectful nod. He nodded back and returned to his position.

Up above me, Mr. Balls the paramedic, whinnied, loud enough for everyone there to hear. I then felt myself start to decent, with the two mares on either side of me descending at the same pace. The lower I got, the more I could see the ground. I started to see the tops of trees, then I started to notice more flying ponies up in the air, all were looking in our direction with curiosity in their eyes. Lower and lower we went, and I started to see thatch roof buildings, fields of various crops, an orchard or two. A village was becoming more and more visible, and there were ponies of every color of the rainbow, literally. There were pegasi, unicorns, and regular ponies, each unique. The same could be said out their manes and tails. There were mares, stallions, colts, and fillies, some were young, some were advancing in age. The whole village seemed to have hit the pause button, everyone was looking in our direction. Mr. Balls started to fly in place and lowered me to the ground. I felt the stretcher gently kiss the ground, and the paramedic mare wasted no time undoing the straps connecting to my stretcher. Once free, Mr. Balls descended to the ground himself. We were in front of a rather large building, a white + emblem was on the sign followed by unreadable words. “Must be some sort of hospital,” I pondered.

The hot air balloon landed not too far away, and all of its occupants were getting out, Butter being very careful of my dogs, “They seemed to listen to her well,” I thought. Five of the ponies started moseying over to Big White, while the rainbow one slowly made her way over too, her head hung low and with droopy ears. She practically avoided looking in my direction. Big White, who was standing broadside to me, her sun mark on display, knickered to the Purple one. I started to look at the thighs of all the other ponies. They each had a unique mark. “How did I not notice those before, Are they a brand?” I wondered. Getting tired of being strapped down to this stretcher, I start to undo all my straps, starting with my chest. The paramedic mare, who was helping Mr. Balls out of his harness, noticed me undoing my restraints, was immediately to my side, trying to get me to stop. “Hey I’m ok, let me stand girl.” I told the mare.

Big White, upon hearing me speak, and seeing me trying to undo my restraints, nickered to the paramedic mare. With an annoyed breath, the mare stopped trying to stop me, and proceeded to help me with the rest of the straps. When the last restraint was un done at my feet, I swung my legs off the side, my boots touching the dirt path that led to the building. Both Mr. Balls and the mare were behind me and leaned both of their heads down and underneath my arms. The mares head poked out from under my left arm, and Mr. Balls’s head popped out from under my right arm. They both looked up at me and waited for me. Catching on to what they were wanting to do, I put my hat on and winced a bit as I felt two bumps on my head. Taking a deep breath, I nodded my head, and they both lifted me up, working in unison. Once I was more than half way up, the mare switched positions and placed her right front hoof on my back to help steady me up all the way. Once I was standing, they both remained at my side, they had me sandwiched between them, each had their inner front leg pressed to the outsides of my legs to help stabilize me. From my waist down to my feet, they had 100% contact, on both sides, both of my arms were drooped down around their withers, my hands palming their outer shoulder blades. Once I was sure I wasn't going to fall, I tapped the mare's shoulder with my left hand and nodded. She understood and backed off and away but still remained relatively close just in case. “Tyy ThOmsoon, nicker.” the mare spoke and pointed to the hospital building's entrance. I looked at the building then back at her, then nodded. We started heading into the hospital, Mr. Balls insync with me step by step, with my right arm still wrapped around his withers, I looked back to see all the ponies in our group following, but the rainbow one was in the back, still practically dragging her hooves.

Walking into the building, I was led to a rather large room on the ground level, all in all there were eleven ponies in our group. Big White, two pegasus guards, the mare paramedic, Mr. Balls, and the six mares from the hot air balloon and Shay and Lyra. “Where's Big White Stallion and the other two paramedics?” I wondered. About the time I was about to ask, in walked a brown/tan colored stallion with a brown mane and tail. He had what looked like a heart monitor screen for a mark on his thigh. He noticed Big White and bowed, and started to converse with her. The Doctor had his horn lit up and was levitating a clipboard and pencil, quickly writing everything down. While Big White, and the paramedic mare was explaining, I could see the rainbow one in the back start to slouch and try to make herself invisible, trying her damndest to not look me in the eye. I could see that the corners of her eyes had been damp recently.

Once Big White and the mare were done, the doctor walked over to me, I was still standing with Mr. Balls still by my side giving me support if I needed it. The doctor held out a hoof and spoke in their language. “KniCkEr kniCker whinNeY, knicckEer.” I just looked at him and just shrugged my shoulders and shook my head. Then I remembered the drawing pad and blue crayon. I pulled it out and shook it in front of me, then I looked to Big White to see if she understood.

“KnicKeRr Ty Thomson.” she nodded her head. Her horn lit up and a dry erase board with markers appeared in the room. Then she spoke to the Doctor, hopefully explaining how to communicate with pictures. I left Mr. Balls' side, and walked up to the board and grasped a marker, and popped the cap off. I quickly drew a human stick figure, complete with a cowboy hat and boots, then I wrote out my name underneath the stick figure. Then I circled the drawing and my name.

I stepped to the side so everyone could see, then pointed at the drawing and then myself and said “Ty Thomson,” then I pointed at my written out name and said “Ty Thomson.” The ponies who weren't there for my first lesson tried speaking my name, it took them a few tries, but Purple horse said something to them and pointed at her throat. Whatever she said did the trick. All the ponies within the room were reciting my name. “At least now they can address me to get my attention.” I thought.

The doctor then walked up to the board, and grabbed the marker and drew a shirt, and pants. He then drew an X on both items then drew an arrow pointing at my stick figure. He turned around once he was done and looked at me for an answer. I looked him in the eye, and grabbed a handful of my shirt and said “ My clothes? You want them off?.” I questioned The doctor. Sensing my questioned tone, the Doctor thought for a minute the turned around then drew another picture, this time it was a drawing of a band aid and he drew lines to my stick figure. The Doctor again turned around to face me, to find my reply. I nodded my head and gave my answer, “Ok, I get it now, gimme a sec.” I walked back over to where Mr. Balls had brought me to earlier, there was a hospital bed there, and I decided to use part of it as a table. I unfasten my shoulder holster and place it on the bed within hands reach. Next I peel my boots off one by one and set them next to the bed. Next I start unbuttoning my shirt and peel it off and drape it on the bed. With my back facing the crowd, I heard a few of them gasp then I heard a few call my name. I turned back around to see what the fuss was about, then I heard even more gasps. “What's wrong?” I asked. The paramedic mare walked up to me and pointed at certain spots on my body, I looked down at what she was pointing at. I had several black and blue bruises starting to form. I gently ran my hand over most of the bruises, they were sore, and I winced a bit, but nothing was broken, thank god. I gave her a reassuring smile and a thumbs up and said, “Ty Thomson Ok.” She nodded her head then backed away again. Undoing my belt buckle, and pants button and unzipping my Wranglers, I drop em and go to sit down on the bed to step out of them one leg at a time, but as soon as my ass hit the bed, I felt a jolt of pain on my ass, “OUCH GOD DAMN IT!” I yelled. The Doctor and the two paramedics moved in to assist me, but I held a hand out to stop them. “Definitely feels like I got a huge bruise on my ass.” I told the audience. With my clothes off except my socks and boxers, I looked at the Doctor for more instructions. He turned back to the board and drew something that resembled my boxers, complete with an X crossing it out. He looked back at me, I looked back at him, and said “You cant be fucking serious!? What about all of them?” I pointed at my audience while shaking my head. The Doctor looked at the other ponies in the room, then back to me then nodded his head. He trotted over to a part of the room and started to bull out a curtain from the wall.once it was almost closed, he started to ussur everyone out except the two paramedics and himself, from our side. “Should I have a few of them in here? I thought. “Big White, Purple Horse, Butter, Shay and Lyra.” I spoke out. Each one funneled into my side of the curtain. Once they were in the Doctor knickered to the ponies on the other side, then closed the curtain. “Well I guess if you guys are ready?” I looked at each of them, the Doctor nodding his head. I turned around and gathered up my shirt, and placed it over my package then hooked the waistband of my boxers and pulled them down. With my bare ass facing towards the smaller crowd, I heard several gasps, Butter was up and by my side in no time nickering and whinnying to me in an extremely worried voice. The Doctor and the Paramedic mare walked up to me also with sympathetic stares. Seeing a mirror. I walked over to it and turned around to see my ass’s reflection.

Right there on each cheek, was the perfect outline of a hoof print, and they were both black and blue. I stood up with one hand still grasping my shirt over my groin, I limped over to the curtain and started to pull it back, but Mr. Balls was there to do it for me, “Thanks,” I said quietly to him. The other members of our group were revealed to me, the two guards were watching the door, and the other four mares were sitting on some waiting chair cushion things. Three of them were sitting upright and watching my every move, the fourth was curled up like a dog, her head pointed to the wall. When I had most of their attention, I turned around and showed them my bruised bottom. They all made their own version of a shocked gasp, including the two guards. Then I stepped in front of the rainbow one, and waited for her to turn around and look at me. The orange pony was sitting the closest to her and reached out with a hoof and tapped the rainbow one on the head. Rainbow lifted her head up and turned her head to look at her friend, then she caught sight of me standing in front of her, she slowly stood upright and faced me. I turned around and showed her my bruised backside. “Did you do this to me?” Her eyes shrank to pinpricks once she saw the damage, her eyes started to moisten a bit, then she then looked up into my eyes, she nodded her head then she spoke.

“Knick KniCkerR! WhinnY WhiNny Knicker knicinny….” she kept going. I couldn understand anything she was saying. I held my hand out and motioned her to follow me. She hesitantly followed me to the board. I erased everything and drew a castle on the far left, then put three big dots in a row at the bottom of the board, then I drew Mr. Balls and his harness with me on the stretcher in the air along with all the others that were with us in the air. I turned to face the crowd and Purple whined out loud and clapped her hooves together several times. Purple trotted up to the board and cleared my beautiful art and took the marker in her weird levitation ability and got to work. In the meantime, I walked over to the bed and layed belly down to let the Doctor, doctor me, while I watched Purple draw a picture book of the events that led us to where we are now.