I lived, B*tch: A G5 Sombra Fanfiction
Cold…
Dark…
Nothingness…
How do I always find myself back here in the cold unforgiving unreality? Curses to that Twilight Sparkle and her friends. How was I supposed to know that they didn’t need the Elements of Harmony to be rid of me? How was I supposed to know? But perhaps that doesn’t matter now. I am banished to here in the Aether and there’s nothing I can do.
Time is irrelevant in this realm, so I know nothing of how much time has passed in the material plane. Has a week gone by? A month? A year? Another 1,000 years? The stars only know. But perhaps this is a fitting punishment for my deeds. Radiant Hope deserved more than what I could offer all those years ago, but I have chosen my path, I will rule Equestria one day.
But when? When will I be restored from this personal hell?
…
What was that?
I feel… Something. I hadn’t felt anything since I was banished. Could… It be?
Could some fool be trying to bring me back?
Slowly, I could feel my very essence being brought into the warm light of reality and everything goes bright, blinding me temporarily.
Once my vision returns, I see I’m in a home, books, and paper littered all over, a telescope pointed out a window, and some items I don’t even recognize. I still feel my head all dizzy; all this is overwhelming. I look down to try and take it all in but I saw that at my hooves, I wasn’t alone in this room.
A purple mare, with a dark brown mane that looked very unkept. Her pink eyes were wide and her mouth agape. An earth pony. Strange, could she have summoned me? I look further down at the floor and there was a symbol on the floor, drawn in what appears to be red chalk. I look back at the mare, who got up and backed away from me, a smile slowly creeping on her face.
“IT WORKED!” She shouted, throwing her hooves in the air. I cover my ears at the sudden shout, reminding myself I had ears, and stumbled back and sat on the floor, looking at this crazy mare, “Oh my stars, I can’t believe it! King Sombra! In my house!” She rushes to her desk and takes a… Slab? Off of it and brings it over, grabbing me and pulling me close. She holds the slab up and I could see myself and her on it, so perhaps a mirror? She puts on a grin and says, “Saaaaaay cheese!” A flash of light emits from the mirror, disorienting me more as I fall on my back. What is this crazy mare doing to me???
As I recover and shake off the dizziness, I look up and see the mare peering over me, “Whoops, you ok?” I shake my head, groaning.
I pick myself up, “You have any magic to deal with a headache?”
“Oh no, I don’t, but I got the second-best thing!” She trots over to a door that I failed to accord for and opens it, “Follow me.”
I do so, walking down the halls of this home. The walls don’t seem to be made of wood completely. Perhaps a new form of architecture? Perhaps, I’ll have to look more into it in case I would need to perform a siege somewhere. Continuing, I enter a larger room, one half seems to be the kitchen while the other seems to be a lounge. A larger slab hangs over a fireplace and a few seats are littered about. On the kitchen side, the mare is there, pouring water from a faucet into a kettle. Except this kettle doesn’t go on the stove, rather on a stand and the mare flips a switch on the kettle. I watch skip over to a cabinet and pull out two mugs: one plain white one and one with the letter B on it. Seems to be her initial.
The mare looks at me and asks, “Mint or lemon tea?”
“Uh…”
“Mint-Lemon tea it is!” She takes out three tea bags and places two in the plain cup and one in the B cup, “I like mint, very relaxing.”
I sit down at the table and rub my temples. This is all very overwhelming. But no matter! Once I recover front his shock, I’ll find Twilight Sparkle and her friends, take them down, and take over Equestria!
Or at least… That’s what I thought… Before I look out of the window.
Outside, night has fallen and I could see a town on a coast. Ponies walking, talking, and enjoying their evening. That would be found, if the buildings didn’t look so… Different. I had never seen buildings like those before, and the lampposts seem to be not magic, otherwise, they would have an aura around them. ponies also had those slabs in their hooves, tapping them and laughing at whatever is on them. This is a confusing new town I found myself in.
The mare wanders over and sits down, sliding a plate of veggies between us, “Culture shock, huh?”
“What?”
“Ya know, you’re like… thousands of years old. Modern times must be strange.” She munches on a carrot.
I roll my eyes, “Is Princess Twilight Sparkle nearby? And how far is the Crystal Empire from here? I have a throne to reclaim.”
“Who’s Twilight Sparkle?”
“What? She’s the hero of Equestria, the Element of Friendship, the prodigy of Princess Celestia. Ring any bells?”
The mare sits there thinking, “Oh! I read about her, yeah that’s like… thousands of years ago, dude. You’re talking about someone who lived and died a long time ago.”
I blink., “what…?” If what this mare says is true, then I’m in the future. Which means… I grin, “HA! I LIVE, BITCH! TAKE THAT CADENCE! I’LL BE TAKING OVER THE EMPIRE THANK YOU VERY MUCH!”
The mare stumbles back at my outburst, “Woah Woah Woah! Calm down! What’s the Crystal Empire?”
My smile slips a little, “It’s an empire made of crystals and home the Crystal Ponies. A land of hope. A land I shall rule with an iron—”
“well good luck ruling it because it’s long gone too.”
“What?”
“Yeah, how do you think I found the ritual to bring you back? I did my research and The Crystal Empire is long gone. Unless you like ruling over a wasteland of ice and snow, then tough break, buddy.”
Now I’m starting to worry… “Is… are we still in Equestria?”
“Oh yeah most definitely. That has not changed, though I don’t think it’s the same one you knew before.”
“Well… It’s a start. I shall conquer this realm and you can’t stop me!”
“Yeah, I wasn’t.” A click is heard in the background, “Ooooh the water is boiled.”
“Wait… What?”
“The tea. Remember?” she pours the water in both cups and brings the plain one to me.
“No no, aren’t you going to tell whatever royalty that evil has reemerged?”
“No. Honestly, joining your side sounds fun.”
“But, I’m evil.”
“Listen. Mortality isn’t black and white, it’s all grey. And I want to join the side where there’s an awesome king of shadows who can create crystals.” She pulls out a book and opens an illustration: A highly stylized image of myself conjuring crystals, fighting again a pink alicorn that I presumed to be Cadence.
I pondered for a moment, before grinning, “Very well. You shall be my willing peon! We shall conquer all of Equestria!”
“Yay!”
“Er, what is your name, anyway?”
“Oh uh…” She fidgets for a moment, sipping her tea, “It’s Brave Hope.”
“Well Brave Hope.” I conjure up some shadowy crystals and create a pedestal, elevating myself nearing to the ceiling, “The king is back! And no Princess will stand in my way and my conquest of all of the realm!”
“Amen!” Brave got up from her seat, “Before we do that, you want to watch some TV?”
I dismiss my crystals and look at Brave, confused, “What’s… TV?”
“Oh ho ho! You got a lot to learn about this place Sombra.” She guides me to the lounge and sits on the couch, I follow suit. She takes out a device and points it to the back slab on the wall. It flicks to life, displaying all sorts of images.
I think I’m going to like this new reality.
Author's Note
Hey thanks for reading this goofy little fanfiction about one of my favorite villains of G4! I hope I'm somewhat correct in some of my predictions when the show comes out, but in the meantime, thanks Orin331 on DeviantArt for the inspiration!
ALSO, I WOULD LIKE TO MENTION THAT THIS IS A SH*TPOST LITE
I didn't put much thought into it so sorry for the plot holes! >~<
Hope yall have a good day!
