Canterlot Tales

by cammerhammer

Rating: everyone
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, Random, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Shining Armor
Length: 1576

Shenanigans ensue when Twilight's imagination roams free

Twilight may not be the friendliest filly in Canterlot, but she is definitely the most interesting. When something goes awry near Starswirl Street, she is sure to be involved with, if not at the bottom of, the ruckus.

A short oneshot, but may expand as more ideas arise.

Cover image is .:BBBFF:. by kiki-kit on deviantart

Published 2012-11-01 01:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-11-06 00:19:09 UTC

Storming the Castle

Twilight Sparkle's light chain mail jingled against her body as she moved with deadly purpose towards her brother's final hiding place. She had swiftly ousted him from every one of his fortifications in her attempt to rescue her friend that was trapped in his clutches, only for him to fall back to another secure location. She grew tired of his constant cowardice, and her patience had long since reached its end. She had ensured this to be his last retreat through the blocking of all the escape routes from the fortress that lay before her.

The fortress loomed over Twilight's head, a testament to her brother's final defense against his enraged sister. Not that it would do any good, of course. She trotted over to the vast double doors and raised an armored hoof to the oak beams, pounding on the door three times. "Shining Armor! Come out here and face me like a stallion! Or are you going to hide behind your walls like the coward you are?"

A voice floated down to the lavender unicorn from the crenelations. "You know what I request of you, sister! Give me back what is mine, and your little companion shall be returned to you unharmed."

Twilight's upper lip curled as she laughed disdainfully. "I have not deprived you of anything that you rightly deserve. I give you one final warning: Return her to me, or suffer the consequences."

A blue-maned head popped over the wall and blew raspberries at her in retort.

"Be that way, then, you loser!" Twilight lowered her horn at the doors and probed them for enchantments. She chuckled menacingly as she felt the inferior spellwork laced throughout the wood. With a powerful blast of energy, she punctured a hole, sized just large enough for her to step through with ease. Klaxons blared as she walked through the gap in the door. With a contemptuous sniff, she pointedly ignored them as she trotted through the outer courtyard.

The mare spotted her brother's tail disappearing into another doorway, this one being immediately closed off with solid stone. "You can't hide from me forever!" She gathered her magic into a magical battering ram. Eyeing the target, she sent the ram crashing into the door.

Thud. The door stood, unharmed

Thud. A crack appeared in the granite obstruction.

Thud. The crack grew slightly larger. Twilight grunted in impatience, swinging the battering ram back farther in response.

Thud. Three more cracks branched their way out, still only covering a few inches in each direction.

Thud. The cracks spider-webbed their way across the door. "Oh, come on!" Twilight yelled. She tripled the size of the battering ram and swung the massive construct like a baseball bat. The entire wall gave way, tearing itself free and knocking a sizable gap in the outer wall.

Shining Armor's muffled voice cried out from the interior, "Hey! That took me all day to build!"

Twilight ignored the complaint as she levitated her trusty sword from its scabbard, the hilt covered in a magenta glow. She stepped purposefully into the dark inner sanctum, the only source of light being her glowing horn. "You can't hide from me forever, brother."

"Who says I am hiding?" Shining Armor stepped into a suddenly appearing beam of light, brandishing a sword of his own.

With a lethal grace, Twilight pounced towards her brother, swinging her sword in a flurry of attacks. Shining effortlessly parried each one, letting out a yawn as she assaulted him. "Have we started yet?"

She snarled in response, redoubling her effort. "Give her back!"

"Who's gonna make me?"

With a final blow, Twilight smashed both their swords to smithereens. "I will."

"I highly doubt that, my little sister." With a wave of his horn, Shining Armor encased Twilight in a pink bubble.

She rolled her eyes in response. "Really? That old trick again? I expected more of you, Shiny." The purple unicorn waved her own horn, and a magic blade cut through the barrier like a knife through butter.

A second barrier quickly reappeared. Twilight flicked the blade again, only for it to stop short. "What?"

Shining Armor smiled, although it was more strained than before. "I was wondering when you would learn that trick. Fortunately, I picked up a new shield spell a little while ago."

Twilight looked around desperately for a way out. She spied a pair of eyes in the corner, one red and one blue. "Mrs. Trousers! You have to help me! Please!"

"Oh, I don't think she will be helping you any time soon." Her brother let out a wicked laugh as she continued to plead with her friend, only to realize he was right. Mrs. Trousers had betrayed her. She had come all this way for nothing.

Twilight let out a feral howl of anguish, feeling the bitter betrayal of her friend and her brother as she futilely assaulted the barrier once more. With one final cry, she played her last card. "Mo-om!"

"Mo-om! Shiny trapped me in a forcefield again!"

"Twilight started it! She destroyed my box fort!"

"He foalnapped Mrs. Smartypants!"

"She took my spell primer!"

The door to the backyard opened for Twilight Velvet to a scene of madness. Cardboard was strewn about the yard. A pair of wooden swords sat in the center of the yard, shattered by blows that their flimsy construction simply was not meant to take. Hoof-shaped divots of sod were carved out of the earth around the shouting pair of siblings. Twilight was scrabbling at a pink forcefield with her hooves while Shining Armor strained to keep the furious filly contained. Mrs. Smartypants sat off to the side, quietly taking in the chaos with her mismatched button eyes and offering no opinion on the matter at hoof.

"Twilight. Shining." With those two words, all fighting ceased as her children's attention was drawn towards her. "What is going on out here?"

"Twilight destroyed my box fort. I worked all day yesterday building and enchanting the walls."

"It's not my fault you're lousy at building." The lilac filly stuck her tongue out at her older brother.

"Twilight, I will not have you insult your brother like that. If you think you can do better, you should help him. Now, why did you feel it necessary to tear down his fort?"

"I had to get Mrs. Smartypants back. He had taken her away from me." She directed her glare towards the stuffed animal. "If you weren't such a traitor, we could have taken him together."

"And why did he hold her hostage?" The younger Twilight looked down and mumbled something into her mane. "I'm sorry, you will have to speak up, darling."

"I said I took his spell primer."

"Why did you take his spell primer?"

"I already finished with mine."

Twilight Velvet raised her eyebrows. "We got that one for you two weeks ago."

"I know. It was easy."

"You still didn't have to take mine. I need that for cadet training." Shining harrumphed.

Twilight Velvet cast another glance about the yard. "Shiny, how can you expect to get into the guard if you are the one causing the damsels distress? You are supposed to save them, not hold them captive, you silly colt." She laughed lightly as she nuzzled the embarrassed cadet.

"As for you, young mare, you know better than to take things that don't belong to you. If you need more spellbooks, just ask your father or me. Both of us would be more than happy to help you study or get you more materials." The elder Twilight nuzzled the younger in turn as she addressed her. "Now, you two need to apologize to each other."

Shining Armor scuffed the ground lightly with his hoof. "I'm sorry for trapping you in a bubble and stealing Mrs. Smartypants."

"I'm sorry for tearing your box fort down and taking your primer."

"I forgive you," they simultaneously replied and hugged each other, giggling.

Twilight Velvet committed the moment to memory: brother and sister hugging in the midst of a field of destroyed cardboard, both of them dirty and sweaty from their fighting just moments before. Which reminded her...

"Now that the two of you have straightened that out, I would like you to take a look at the yard." The siblings cast a look at the backyard, their smiles slowly falling off their faces as they realized what was coming next. "I don't want to see a single scrap of cardboard in this yard when I come back out in a half hour."

"Aww, Mom-"

"Don't 'Aww, Mom' me. You have a lot to work to do before I come back out, so get to it. And Twilight, since you were so generous to volunteer to tell your brother what he did wrong in building his fort, you get to help him rebuild it. Is that clear?"

"But Mom-"

"Is that clear?"

Twilight sighed. "Yes, ma'am."

"Good. If you hurry, I might even have a new primer for you once you finish up. Would you like that, Twily?"

The little unicorn perked up immediately, jumping up and catching Shining Armor's mane in her teeth. "Come on, Shiny, we have to hurry so I can get my new spell primer!" she mumbled around his mane.

"Ow! Hey, that's my mane! Alright, alright, just please let me go?"

"Shiny?"

"Yeah, Twily?"

"I love you."

"I love you too, sis."