Well, this girl is definitely out of her mind.
Your wax parlor is visited by various weird types, but this one definitely steals the cake (you hope not literally; nevertheless, you told Aloe and Lotus to watch out for her). She’s been sitting here all day, fidgeting nervously. She must be in her mid-twenties despite the short stature making her look younger; she wears purple glasses, yellowish skin and the hair in a mess of blueish and greenish tones like a pond full of algae. You’re pretty sure she works at the local cinema.
Wait, didn’t she trash the mall once? Maybe she’s some terrorist? Recently the daughter of a local undertaker got arrested when she tried to buy sarin from two FBI agents. You never know with those young girls.
But then, what are the chances of that? Maybe she’s just nervous because her vagina hadn’t seen the light of day since puberty had first hit her? You’ve seen some truly hopeless cases; for example your former roommate was too autistic to understand that in some cultures (for instance, this culture), nudity is a taboo.
“Excuse me,” you say, walking to her across the waiting room. “How can I help you?”
She nearly jumps out of her seat. “G-good morning!” she exclaims. “Mr. Luigi, right?”
It’s not your name and there’s only one person who calls you that. Which explains a lot. “SIlver Spoon sent you, right?”
“Well, she told me about you,” the girl replies.
You wonder just how much Silver told her about you. You datedfor a few months after you took her and Diamond Tiara’s virginity. Even though it didn’t quite work out—after all, you’re twice Silver’s age and she mentioned something about feeling that she’d get ritually sacrificed everytime you had sex to Alice in Chains—you still met from time to time to casually bang.
“Right,” you say. “I assume you want to remove some excess hair? Everybody here does, no need to be worried or ashamed about it. We have wax, laser hair removal, you can also get a massage from the best European masseuses…”
Speaking of, recently Aloe and Lotus complained to you that most women who show up for laser hair removal have bits they didn’t expect women to have, like moustaches or, what apparently unnerved them greatly, penises. You had to sit down and tell them that some things are different in this country. For example, polar bears don’t wander in the streets, fish can be eaten before they rot, and an increasing percentage of women have penises.
They didn’t talk to you for a week because of the fish thing. Also, you found a can of surstromming in your car, but luckily you got rid of it before it exploded. The day care center is still being cleaned, however.
You wonder if Juniper has a penis. Probably not, she’s too tastefully dressed. Seriously, the only two people you know who can pull this look off are Flash Sentry and Fleur de Lis. As far as you know, Flash is just happy with his femboy stuff, while Fleur is already looking for some schmuck to sponsor her brand new vagina.
“I need your help,” Juniper says.
“I’ll tell you the same thing I told Fleur de Lis,” you reply. “Unless you need life-saving surgery, the best I can offer you is a job. Do you happen to be a hairstylist?”
There’s already one hairstylist in your parlor, a vulgar, chain-smoking girl around Silver’s age called Babs. She once sucked your dick on her salon chair, leaving you with mixed feelings. For starters, you really hope she cleaned the chair afterwards. Also, you wonder if you can get dick cancer from secondhand smoke and whether sufficient vulgarity of speech can neutralize oral STDs.
Also, last and not least, you sometimes wonder where all those girls sucking your dick come from. This just keeps happening. You’re sure that if you ended up in a monastery, you’d somehow end up fucking a nun. Or several.
Well, you may have fucked a nun once. It was slightly better than Babs and much better than Moondancer.
“Of course not, I’m an actress,” Juniper replies. “Well, I haven't really made it big yet.” She hands you a flash drive. “This is my portfolio, so to speak. Some normal scenes and some, uhh… demanding ones.” She blushes. “But I’d need help with a scene.”
Great, another one. “If you want to suck my dick, let me take a shower first,” you say. “Trust me, you don’t want to do it right now, I had to run a lot of errands in the morning and–”
“Suck your dick? Here?” she asks, blushing furiously.
This world is just full of sluts, really. You’ve never got yelled at or slapped in the face for being this direct. Most of them just ask, “Here?” At least she didn’t immediately drop to her knees like Fleur when you mentioned a job.
She was really disappointed when you told her that the job would involve polishing the floor rather than your rod. And when you actually handed her a mop, she stormed off, muttering something nasty in French.
“Not here, obviously.” You roll your eyes.
“Right,” she says, looking at the waiting room of your wax-slash-massage parlor. “I have a nice little studio at home. Perfect setup for recording.”
You swear, irony died sometime in the last decade, along with Lost fandom, sparkly vampires, and sense of humor. Though on a second thought, Silver is still into sparkly vampires, but she’s a bit on the spectrum.
“What will I get from this?” you ask.
She shrugs. “Exposure? I guess once I become famous, I may help you get some nice part…”
You give her a look suggesting that it doesn’t jive well with your Protestant work ethic. Granted, you’ve last gone to church somewhere around the fifth season of Friends, but still, such things are hard to forget.
“My boyfriend used to say that I’m pretty good.” Juniper smirks. “I can do even the most demanding stuff. Just look at my portfolio.”
“You have a boyfriend?” you ask. Usually, you’re not into cucking, adultery, netorare, and most of the other fetishes with Japanese names. Well, Spoiled Rich was an exception, but she paid you a lot and the sooner Filthy Rich divorces her, the better for him.
You may have given Diamond Tiara a few photos of her mother taking your dick up the ass, telling her to use them at the right moment.
“Not anymore.” Juniper shrugs. “I didn’t really stab him. Well, there was that thing when I faked suicide by hanging and put hidden cameras in the room to watch his reaction. It really soured the mood for the next few weeks.”
“Why?” you ask.
“When he saw me, he muttered, ‘oh, thank you, Jesus’, flipped me off and tried to pee on my body.” She sighs. “What a dickhead. There was also that thing at the McDonald’s, with the fake grenades and the neighbor’s newborn…”
Dick, meet crazy.
“‘Thank you, Jesus’?” you ask, deciding to proceed with caution and not ask about the grenades. “Rude.”
“Especially weird since he was Jewish.” Juniper shrugs. “Anyway, here’s my portfolio and a phone number. If you’re interested, just call me.” With these words, she winks at you and goes away.
You shake your head. The things some weirdos do to get in your pants. At least she didn’t write a letter to you in her menstrual blood like that one kid who got righteously wheeled away to the nuthouse.
Wincing at the memory, you look at the flash drive. Maybe one day you’ll take a look.
***
In the end, you did watch Juniper’s portfolio.
It was definitely very professional. Also, the first videos were fairly normal, with her acting out scenes from shitty TV shows or Shakespeare plays; you’re no expert, but you feel her attempts at being dramatic kinda fall flat. A girl who in her mid-twenties still looks like a bespectacled schoolgirl doesn’t make a very convincing Lady Macbeth. You were about to throw the flash drive in the trash, when you encountered a brief clip of her playing with her boobs.
This got you interested. A couple of solo scenes followed; nothing too hardcore at first, masturbation with a hand, with some modestly-looking dildos—Silver owns a few bigger ones and when she masturbates, it’s an unique combination of science and art—a cucumber, Hitachi Magic Wand…
Then there was a video of her cooking naked. It was actually interrupted as, let’s face it, boiling oil and bare boobs shouldn’t mix under any circumstances. Though still, the way she knocked the camera over and fell on her ass did quite a few unexpected things to your dick.
There was also a whole folder of various outfits. The maid one was already good, but when she dressed as a nurse and ‘vaccinated’ herself with a healthy dose of buttplugs, you called Silver Spoon in the middle of the night, told her that she needed to get a nurse outfit as soon as possible, and that then you’d plow her ass so hard that she’d cry your cum rather than tears.
She said that you were insane, that you had kinda broken up and that she was on her way because all the boys she tried to date recently were a bunch of boring cunts in tight pants.
That’s your girl. She did come to your house and then she came again and again, so to speak. She may think you’re old, but this old snake still has some skins left to shed.
Of course you asked SIlver what she wanted to achieve by sending Juniper to you, but she was a bit vague. At least you know that it was either “I hoped she’d get laid” or “it was a subtle way to tell her to get fucked.”
So anyway, you called Juniper and here you are, in front of her door with a bottle of wine. You may go there to just fuck her, but you may as well make it somewhat romantic.
It’s a really nice loft and you wonder whether her uncle bought it for her or she put some videos from her portfolio on the internet. Probably a bit of both. She opens the door, dressed in a white bathrobe and smelling of something nice. Aloe or Lotus would probably know what, but for you it’s “probably shampoo”.
“Hi,” she says, eyeing the bottle of wine. “I cooked some spaghetti…”
“Naked?” you ask, chuckling.
“Nah, I don’t cook naked anymore,” she replies, inviting you inside. The apartment is kinda nice, with some posters and movie memorabilia on the walls. You spot a bedroom with quite a large bed, but Juniper leads you to the kitchen table.
“I’ve been told my spaghetti is pretty good,” she says, blushing furiously. “I always play The Macarena on repeat when it cooks so it boils faster.”
“Okay, that’s a bit weird, but her spaghetti is indeed delicious. To quote a great modern philosopher, finally some fucking good food. You wish more girls would cook for you rather than try to have sex with you. Why can’t you be like this guy who comes from the land down under? A strange lady gave him breakfast, a guy from Brussels gave him a vegemite sandwich… Everyone seems to give him food.
Well, when you were stuck with Silver’s attempts at cooking, it was kinda like this. The girl did glow and you chundered. After she tried to make curry, your kitchen also started to glow and somehow you ended up threesoming a sexy bisexual fireman. It was exactly as weird as it sounds.
Juniper looks at you. “What’s up?” she asks. “It’s not good? Your mother probably makes better spaghetti, right, Luigi?”
“My ancestors moved here from North Brabant some two centuries ago,” you reply. “Maybe if you tried to make hachee, it’d be true.”
She nods, probably trying to process where the hell is North Brabant. Meanwhile, you take care of spaghetti. You’re gonna need a lot of calories for what’s about to happen, especially since you promised Silver some new fapping material.
You also already found Silver a psychotherapist. As in, how many teen girls are into porn of their ex (who, with a bit of luck, could be their father) and their friend? You have a nagging suspicion that your (almost) in-laws failed at parenting hard.
Also, the psychotherapist is gay and didn't try to suck your dick, which is always a nice change of pace.
“What are you thinking about?” Juniper asks.
“Parenting,” you reply, trying to get the image of Silver Spoon out of your mind.
“Oh, don’t worry about that,” Juniper says. “I’m on a pill, you can safely cum wherever you want.” She produces a piece of paper. “I mean, I did prepare a little script, but it’s not very detailed. I prefer to be spontaneous.”
Says the girl who basically wants you to star in amateur porn. And even wrote a script.
“Who am I in this one?” you ask, taking the last bite of your spaghetti and a sip of wine. “A pizza guy? A teacher? A plumber? I could be a doctor.”
Juniper smirks. “I see you liked the nurse one, huh?” She lowers her voice to a whisper. “I’ll tell you a secret: I’m wearing a buttplug right now.”
Well, nice. You wonder if it’s one of the bigger ones.
“Guess we won’t be going for much of a plot,” Juniper says. “It’s corny and everyone skips to the fun parts anyway.”
Well, unless they watch out of morbid curiosity. Juniper gets up and leads you to her bedroom.
It’d be pretty comfy if it wasn’t also filled with cameras, making it look like a part of a movie set. There’s a large bed in the middle of it, surrounded by a couple of stuffed toys. You’re actually afraid to touch them – you’ve seen so many clips of Juniper doing questionable things here that the whole room probably shines in the UV light like a cult’s orgy murder room that was discovered back when you were in Crystal Prep. Just like in the other parts of the house, the walls are covered with movie stills, as well as some photos. One of them depicts Juniper’s uncle, another a much younger Juniper with people who seem to be her parents, and the rest look like they’re stock pictures that came with the frames. There’s also something that looks like a vet school poster explaining how to euthanize a rabbit. Now this is a bit disturbing.
“Isn’t it nice?” Juniper asks.
You’ve seen better; besides, the plushies remind you of Silver’s room (though not quite – for example, Juniper’s plush of Dad from Bluey appears to be rallying the police pup from Paw Patrol, while bound and gagged bluejay from Regular Show watches). You’ve never banged Silver in her room, to be honest, mainly because her parents didn’t approve of you, to put it mildly.
“Great,” you reply. After all, you’re here to bust a nut, not the girl’s feelings.
“Thanks.” Juniper drops the bathrobe, revealing navy blue lingerie, complete with stockings and garter belt. Garter belt! You’re pretty sure she got this in some store for slutty schoolgirls.
Hell, you know some schoolgirls who, depending how you look at it, are either not as slutty or even sluttier. For example, Silver often wore a short skirt, daring everyone to notice that she was going commando.
Yeah, somehow lingerie feels sluttier. You’re not quite sure why, but your dick seems to have made his choice.
“Are the cameras on?” you ask.
“They are, yes.” She embraces you, planting a kiss on your lips. Guess in this scenario you’re a loving couple. Too bad, you always wanted to be a plumber.
“We’ll take care of this,” Juniper says, unzipping your pants. You decide to take off your t-shirt; you just have to do it for all the ladies who may ever watch Juniper’s sex tape.
“Wow,” Juniper mutters. “Silver didn’t lie.”
“Oh yeah, I exercise a bit,” you reply, smiling sheepishly and blushing.
“This looks more than ‘a bit’,” Juniper replies. “I think she was exaggerating about this, though…” She pulls your pants down and takes a look at the bulge forming in your boxers. “Okay, maybe not.”
“If you grab a ruler to check, I quit,” you say. You’ve been through this when Silver introduced you to Twilight Sparkle. Poor girl, can’t really decide whether she’s into dicks or science and she tries a bit of both. You tried to cure her of this affliction by spanking her with the ruler before shoving it up her ass, but she first asked for more spanking and then to tell her how deep the ruler went, and was offended you quoted inches instead of centimeters. Silver literally peed herself laughing.
“Hold this.” Juniper hands you another camera and drops on her knees, looking up and pulling down your boxers. Her eyes light up as she takes a look at your cock. She licks her lips and grabs your dick with her hands, examining it closer. She then does the same with your balls.
“If you find a lump, let me know,” you say.
She nods; you feel her soft breath on the tip of your cock as she plants a kiss on it before embracing it fully with her mouth. Then she sucks on it, caressing the tip gently with her tongue.
This just got a lot more interesting. Silver, bless her heart, is definitely not as experienced in the art of sucking dick as Juniper. Well, she wants to be an actress, she probably sucked countless dicks on her way to the top. Hopefully one of them wasn’t her uncle’s… or at least not more than twice.
You decide that it’s better not to think about that, especially since Juniper is really trying and you have to appreciate her effort. You grab her head with your free hand and push forward, feeling her throat open wide as she takes it whole. You can see it bulge on her neck, but she swallows it like a champ and barely even chokes.
You pull back, letting her breathe. She wipes saliva and precum from her face, smiling at you. “Do it again,” she says. “This time don’t stop until I tell you so.”
You nod and grab her again, pushing your cock deep into her throat. Again, she barely chokes on it, gasping for air and sucking on it like crazy. Well, she is definitely crazy; you can feel the muscles of her throat contract around your dick as she fights for breath, but she still doesn’t want you to pull out. Instead, she holds on to your legs, trembling. It would send you right over the edge, but you’re somewhat afraid about her; there’s no way being barely able to breathe for so long is healthy.
She thrashes, almost collapsing to the ground. You pull out, letting her drop to all fours as she takes a few deep breaths, fighting the gag reflex.
“You okay?” you ask, undoing her bra and taking it off – to make breathing easier, of course.
“Again…” she whispers.
“Definitely not,” you reply, helping her get up and sit on the bed. “Do you have a death wish? I don’t want you to die while sucking my dick. Someone may ask questions.”
“I… I may have a bit of a death wish.” She shrugs. “Can you fuck my throat, at least?”
“I have a better idea,” you reply. “Lie down.”
When she obeys, you pull her panties down and gently spread her legs, revealing her tight, moist pussy. She must’ve visited your wax parlor after all; you’re pretty sure you see Aloe’s hand in the landing strip right above Juniper’s clit.
“Eating out won’t look so good on film,” Juniper says.
“Will you shut up now or after I make you cum?” you ask, aiming right for the landing strip.
Juniper moans, feeling your tongue on her clit. Well, she may have thought that almost dying or giving herself permanent brain damage from choking on your cock would give her the kick she needed but you know that what she really needs is a healthy dose of orgasms, cum, and therapy.
To be honest, normally you’d suggest therapy first and orgasms later, but there you are, sticking your tongue—and soon much more—in whatever bundle of issues Juniper has.
Well, right now, she seems to be a bundle of pent-up sexual frustration that no toys could relieve. She screams and moans as you eat her out, her legs wrapping around your neck. You are pretty experienced in this kinda stuff; you know exactly which buttons to push and which nerves to tug on to send her right into orgasm paradise where she can look into the face of God.
Meanwhile, you can look right into her winking pussy. Your cock is throbbing, and your nostrils are filled with the smell of a young girl who may be a bit odd, a little insane, and about to launch her acting career in an entirely wrong direction, but at least she deserves a bit of fulfilment.
“Oh my…” Juniper gasps as the throes of orgasm rock her body yet again. “Silver did tell me you were a cunning linguist, but I thought she just has no one to compare…”
“Do you have anyone to compare?” you ask, giving her clit another nibble.
“Not really.” She smiles sheepishly, still panting after the last orgasm. “My ex couldn’t really do this. Or at least it wasn’t as good.”
Huh. So this is why she made the guy’s life hell? Next thing you know, it’ll turn out that you can end the conflict in the Middle East with copious amounts of eating pussy.
“So, what do we do next?” Juniper asks.
Right. You can deal with only one mental fuck-up at a time and the Middle East is a bit far away. “It’s easy, my dear Juniper. I’m gonna fuck you senseless.”
“Yikes,” she replies. “Sounds like a plan, though.”
“Indeed.” You nod, climbing on the bed. “Let the cameras roll…”
Her pussy is still moist after you ate her out; your dick slides right in with ease. Juniper inhales loudly as you lie down on her, letting her wrap her legs around you. You then roll on the bed, letting her be on the top; after all, no one watches porn to stare at your ass.
Juniper moans, her glasses askew as she lowers herself onto your dick, letting it fill her whole; she then moves up, coating it in her juices. Her hair slips from the grasp of her hair clips; she picks up the pace, letting you enjoy the sight of her bouncing boobs. You grab her ass and hold her closer, plunging deeper into her and hitting her G-spot.
She screams, a huge amount of juices leaking onto your dick. She must’ve been really pent up, judging by how vigorously she continues to fuck and be fucked, as if her life depended on it. The springs in the mattress let out a torturous screech; neither of you is heavy enough to break the bed in half, but you never know.
Juniper slides off of you, prompting you to switch positions. You get up and place one hand on her left boob, grabbing her hair with the other one. Then you just start fucking her from behind, using her hair as a sort of a handle.
“Harder!” she exclaims, tears flowing from her eyes. You’re usually more delicate with Silver, who’s smaller and younger, but you guess with Juniper you can be a bit rough. You spank her bare butt a few times and start pumping; she bites the pillow and moans as another orgasm rocks her body, turning her into a sobbing mess of running makeup, sweat, and girlcum. Its smell fills the entire room.
“Huh…” Juniper pants, turning on her back. “Can you hurt me? Like, really hurt me?”
“I’d rather not,” you reply. The pressure in your balls is getting unbearable and the smell of Juniper’s arousal is driving you insane. You grab her legs and plunge into her yet again. Caught off guard, she gasps, but you hold her firmly, fucking her slowly as she still recovers from the previous orgasm.
Meanwhile, your own orgasm is approaching pretty fast and you get the feeling it’ll be huge. Right before it happens, you grab the camera, getting a good view of Juniper lying on her back on the bed, her legs spread, tits moving up and down in sync with her ragged breath.
You pull out. The first shot of your cum actually reaches her face, hitting the lens of her glasses. She gasps in surprise as you coat her boobs and stomach in cum, letting it pool in her navel and slowly drip down her body and onto the blanket.
“Wow…” Juniper moans, sitting down. Cum drips lower, on her neatly-waxed landing strip and down on her pussy. “That was… For real, I thought it’d be meh, but man…”
She plants a kiss on your cheek. Then she drops on her knees in front of you and starts licking cum and her own juices off of your dick. Another jolt of pleasure hits your balls as she methodically and sensually starts sucking you off. No crazy deepthroat stuff this time; just a masterful way in which she uses her tongue and even teeth, the perfect strength of sucking… You didn’t know she could be so subtle. You thought you were completely spent, but to your surprise, after some ten minutes of her teasing you with her mouth you still cum again.
Juniper smiles at the camera, cum sticking to her teeth, complimented nicely by a drying stain on her glasses. She then swallows, wincing slightly, and smiles at you.
“Nice,” she says. “Now I’ll have to check the footage and–” She gets up and staggers, rubbing her temples. “Wow, now I’m a bit dizzy.”
“I fucked you silly, what did you expect?” you reply. “How about you call it a day? Take a shower and get some rest…”
“But my film career…”
You chuckle. “It can wait. Nothing will come out of it if you die of dehydration.”
“Are you always like that?” Juniper asks. “Now I know what Silver sees in you. She always had daddy issues.”
You shake your head. “What issues do you have?”
“None at all.” She smirks, collapsing onto the bed and losing her glasses. “Okay, I may be a bit tired from wine and all that dicking…”
You sigh, covering Juniper with the only blanket that doesn’t seem to be covered in any suspicious fluids as she falls asleep.
Really, this girl is out of her mind.
Author's Note
January is fucking me up, so have something nice for a change.
