Cobblestone step by cobblestone step, Sky Scribbles slowly made his way down the Guardian's Tower. His fresh diaper, although muffled considerably, still crinkled under the black onesie with every step he took, and at his current gait, he was about twenty seconds away from being among E.U.P. guards and castle staff again. Not only was he going to be agonizingly self-conscious about his clothing, but he also had to figure out what to make for lunch with Celestia. Luckily, he felt his appetite starting to come back already. Coming to the bottom of the stairs, he placed his right hoof on the door, and hesitated.

Was this all some kink-filled test? Were the guards and staff expecting him to be dressed like this? Would etiquette prevent them from making a scene? What would Celestia think?

'Damnit Sky, just go! You think you're going to be ready for whatever a Guardian does if you can't even manage this?' he asked himself in frustration.

When these words settled into his mind, he suddenly felt a little more confident. If this was the 'uniform' of a Guardian, then everypony in the castle should be fine with it. After all, he couldn't imagine that Princess Luna, or even the tower's maid, would deliberately set him up in some exhibition prank.

With his nerves calmed somewhat, he pushed the tower door open, and stepped out onto the battlement connecting it to the rest of the castle. He passed the guards at a steady trot, and fought the urge to look behind him to see any kind of reaction. Celestia's kitchen was mere minutes away, and he had to figure out what he was doing for lunch. He liked to cook, especially for close friends and roommates, but those were decidedly more rustic recipes. He would be cooking along with a princess of Equestria, and she no doubt would have more royal expectations.

Then again, while last night's dinner was no doubt a five-star experience, the pancakes this morning were decidedly more simple. Perhaps that's what Celestia was after; more simple, homestyle food?

The pegasus crossed the battlement, and with several ideas in mind, kept himself from settling on any one dish until he actually got into the kitchen to see what ingredients were on hoof. He passed through the doors to the second floor hall, and was immediately spotted by Silver Platter.

"Ah, impeccable timing, Mr. Scribbles, and I see you are joining us in a bit more of an official capacity," the head butler greeted, noting his 'uniform'. "Princess Celestia asked me to show you to her private kitchen, and she'll be along shortly. If you would please follow me."

The pegasus was once again bewildered when the butler seemed to take no issue with the onesie, or the absolutely noticeable bulge around his nethers, not to mention how it crinkled with every. Single. Step.

Sky was once again led into the dining room, but was taken past the long table to a pair of swinging doors on the left of the room. He had been in enough restaurants to know that those led to the kitchen, and sure enough Silver Platter pushed the left door open, and held it open for him, letting him step into an impressive commercial-grade kitchen.

"Please familiarize yourself with your surroundings while you wait on Her Highness. I hope you both have an excellent meal, Mr. Scribbles," Silver told him, before departing out into the dining hall again, the door swinging shut behind him, leaving the pegasus alone in the kitchen for now.

The first thing he noticed on the stainless steel counters was the row of spice jars. When he saw the jar of fresh white button mushrooms, the home cook inside clicked, and he instantly started looking in the cabinets to see if there were all the ingredients for hayburgers. He would need fresh hay, a bonding agent or two, brioche buns, and then he and the Princess could show their creative culinary sides with the toppings. He set aside the mushrooms and immediately began searching the cabinets and pantry for the pans and other ingredients he would need. He had his body nearly half into one of the bottom cabinets pulling out one of the larger skillets when he heard the doors swing open again.

"Well, I see someone is eager to get started," he heard the voice of Princess Celestia. He tried to stand up which his head still in the cupboard, and thus bumped his head against the bottom of the counter before pulling himself up, pan in his right wing, and offered a quick bow.

"I hope I'm not intruding, Your Highness. Mr. Platter showed me in," he explained.

"Not at all, Mr. Scribbles. A cook should be comfortable and familiar with the area he's working in, novice and professional alike. So what did you have in mind for lunch today?" Celestia asked, as she grabbed an apron to tie around her barrel, before likewise passing one to the pegasus, who was realizing that covered or not, his padded rump was all that was in sight when he was digging around for the pan held in his wing. There was absolutely no way she wouldn't have noticed. He accepted the white apron and got it hung around his neck before setting the pan on the gas range.

"I was thinking hayburgers, Your Highness, with brioche buns," Sky told her.

"Sounds decidedly simple and rustic," Celestia replied, and the pegasus smiled with confidence.

"Only if you want it to be, Princess. The hay patty and the bun are just the foundation. The dressings and toppings could be simple enough to feel at home in a tavern in Appleloosa, or it could be elegant enough to be fit for a five-star dining experience right here in the castle."

"Well, I'll admit that my cooking experience primarily lies in making breakfast, before my day usually gets impossibly busy. So, Mr. Scribbles, consider me your sous chef. What do you need from the pantry?" Celestia asked him.

"One of my favorite burgers has a simply divine mushroom cream sauce. I've already got the mushrooms out, so I'll need scallions, garlic, sour cream, and vegetable stock concentrate," the pegasus began. "For the sides, I believe carrots and potatoes will do splendidly."

"I do believe I can handle the sides, Mr. Scribbles. You focus on the burgers and the sauce," Celestia said, continuing to pass ingredients out of the pantry to his side of the counter. Sky was rather impressed that with all her other obligations, Celestia clearly knew her way around her private kitchen. Once each pony had what they needed, they got to work. Sky quickly got the hay mixed with a bit of milk and bread crumbs and formed patties. Setting them aside, he put the mushrooms into a piping hot pan, and began stirring them occasionally.

"You've clearly done this before, Mr. Scribbles," Celestia commented as she was cutting carrots and potatoes.

"I've got a couple years experience at a hayburger place in Ponyville, before I went to weather full-time," the pegasus replied.

"Oh? Why the switch?" The princess asked.

"Less stressful. Little slower paced. I've always preferred cooking for less people, cooking for friends and family. I feel I can put more heart into it that way, get more creative," Sky explained, gently jerking the pan to flip and toss the mushrooms. With the first ingredient nearly done, the pegasus went over to the cutting board just left of the range, picked up the chef's knife, and did one single cut through the bundle of scallions, separating the whites from the greens, and diced both, keeping them separate. By the time he had the garlic minced, the mushrooms were ready to come off the heat and into a bowl, after which he started cooking the hay patties, and Celestia was next to him frying up the carrots and potatoes, and toasting the brioche buns.

As he cooked their meal together with the Princess of the Sun, Sky couldn't help but begin to wonder if Celestia knew her sister was an ageplayer; that was one of the only reasons he could think of that she wasn't the slightest bit surprised with his 'uniform'. Either that, or she prioritized being cordial and polite above pretty much everything else.

When the patties were done, he transferred them to a plate, put it under a heat lamp, then immediately melted a small lump of butter in the pan, tossing in the garlic, vegetable stock, and scallion whites, combining it into a smooth consistency before adding in the mushrooms and sour cream. A minute later, the cream sauce was complete, as were the buns and sides.

Celestia brought a pair of plates to him with the toasted buns open on them. He placed the patties on first, then carefully spooned on the mushroom sauce, finishing it off with the scallion greens before placing the top buns on each. Then Celestia added servings of seasoned potatoes and carrots, and after grabbing a jug of apple cider from the fridge, the pegasus followed her out to the dining room, where his chair had been brought over from the far end of the table to sit right next to her on the near corner at the head of the table.

"And now the taste test," Celestia said, picking up her hayburger with her magic. Sky merely picked his up with both front hooves, and they took their first bite together.

Sky could tell just from Celestia's widening gaze that she found it delicious.

"Oh my goodness..." The princess remarked, licking away the cream sauce on her lips from her first bite. "Simply exquisite, Mr. Scribbles. If my sister doesn't find you up to par for Guardian, I may have to offer you a position in my kitchen."

Sky beamed at the compliment, but immediately reminded himself to stay humble.

"I'm flattered, Your Highness. But I'm not entirely sure I could stomach the idea of remaining in this castle if I disappoint Princess Luna," the pegasus replied. "I haven't gotten all the answers yet, so I'm not entirely certain what qualities she sees in me."

"Well, I for one see quite the creative cook," Celestia commented after swallowing her second bite. "I won't invite you to dinner just yet, because I'm not sure if Luna has something in mind for you once she wakes up. I am assuming that she'll want you to start staying up later into the night, so if at any point you feel you need to rest, please feel free to return to the Guardian's Tower or your guest room. A nap would no doubt help you stay up later, as would caffeinated beverages during and after dinner."

'It would also be quite appropriate in my current attire,' Sky thought to himself as he took a drink of apple cider. Granted, a nap right after a meal would probably be easiest.

Once the meal was finished, Sky decided to go and try just that.

"Once again, thank you for the opportunity to show you my culinary skills, Your Highness," Sky said, getting up from his chair and offering a bow.

"Thank you for a delicious meal. I'd say same time tomorrow, but if you're going to start acclimating to being up through the night, it may not be realistic or fair to have you here for breakfast or lunch. If my sister has nothing planned for you in the evening, please join me here for dinner again, but of course, anything she has in mind takes precedence. I hope you enjoy the rest of your day, Mr. Scribbles."

With that, Celestia took the empty plates and cups, and returned to the kitchen, and Sky turned to the main doors and exited into the hallway, immediately turning left and exiting the castle out to the battlements, and into the Guardian Tower yet again. With his stomach full of lunch, he was hoping a nap of sorts could be in order. He went up the stairs, opened the door, and passed through the fog, finding himself in the nursery, with Luminescence in the rocking chair reading a book.

She immediately looked up at him and gave a soft giggle.

"So," she began, setting her book down on the side table. "I take it you've noticed your uniform's enchantment by now?" the maid asked.

"Enchantment?" Sky asked.

"Well, of course. You don't think guards and princesses just don't notice an adorable crinkling waddle like that without an enchantment, do you?" she asked.

Sky blushed at her description, more so than being near any of the staff, or even Celestia, for the past hour. Had he really been waddling all this time?

"Incognitus. Your onesie has been permanently enchanted with that spell. To the guards, the staff, and even Celestia herself, it's a completely normal piece of clothing, no matter how much noise it makes, or how much it may stink. Speaking of which, does Luna's little foal need a change?"

Sky felt the heat in his face only increase as Lumi set her book down and got up from the rocking chair, coming over to him, and gave his diaper several pokes in the front and back.

"Nope, you feel dry to me. So let's get you in your crib for a short little nap, shall we?"

Luminescence guided the pegasus over to the crib, where he was lifted up by her magic, and set in the crib.

"There we go, all settled down for a nap. I'll check on you in a few hours. Hopefully you can get some sleep so you can stay up later tonight.

Sky watched as Luminescence raised the bars of the crib, grabbed her book off of the table, and sat back down to read silently as he sunk his head into the pillow and took a deep breath.

As he closed his eyes, he imagined himself walking the streets of Canterlot with this enchanted onesie, with the populace completely unaware of what he was wearing underneath. He was never one for exhibition, so a garment like this would be absolutely perfect if he wanted to wear more often.

But of course, that would mean meeting Luna's expectations, whatever those ended up being...

Author's Note

This is still the most slowly paced story I've written.

I hope it's not too slow for what readers it has.

Thanks for reading, and I'm eager to hear what you think so far, and any more ideas you might have!