My Other Self

by Abremelinthemagus

Rating: teen
Tags: Science Fiction, Profanity, Violence, Princess Celestia, Dark, Death, Alternate Universe, Human, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 3103

Celestia ponders her conversion Bureau counterparts actions.

As a master sorceress, Celestia has seen into other worlds, some of which have other Celestias. Lately she's been noticing a disturbing and annoying trend among many in which they try and inevitably fail to exterminate mankind. All while pondering where exactly they went wrong.

(This is a general overview of Conversion Bureau Celestias but with a lot of plotpoints taken from Spectrumverse and Negotiationsverse)

Contains Sympathetic anti villain Celestia

Published 2022-02-20 00:40:00 UTC
Last updated 2022-02-20 00:40:00 UTC

An infinite hall of mirrors.

We were once so close to heaven
Peter came out and gave us medals
Declaring us the nicest of the damned

-They Might Be Giants

Celestia sighed as she stared gloomily into the orb that sat before her, her golden aura gently pouring a glass of wine to take the edge off this unfortunately common vision that danced across the sphere of light. Centuries ago, after her sisters Banishment Celestia had begun to explore interdimensional travel. At first it was more of a distraction, with quite a few scholars being of the opinion that such things were impossible. Celestia despite secretly agreeing with them kept on as the term impossible never sat well with her though she was smart enough to make it a side project that would not be completed in its founders' lifetimes. That was of course ok, back then she really did have nothing but time as she delegated more and more of her work towards a nearly perfect bureaucratic system of her own design. Something that freed up her schedule immensely for research and experimentation including new ways to improve said bureaucracy, often times implementing them as soon as they were proven. That was the nice thing about absolutism, if a smart and moral pony such as herself was in charge it truly was the best form of government. Even if sometimes she wished that burden did not fall upon her.

By the next century of the project, they had created simple scrying devices like the one she was currently looking at. Two centuries after that, they had begun to work on mirror portals that could transport ponies to other worlds. At first, they were clunky and dangerous things with many brave explorers dying in the process before even setting foot on another world. Of course, she found ways around it by making a converter in which a pony's matter was destroyed, their mind transported, and a new body created from the transferred energy at the other side, often times one resembling the local inhabitants. It was a bit frustrating of course that these hooves would never set foot in another world, but she barely noticed if she didn't think about it.

For the next few centuries until her sisters return, due to both the first long peace in Equestrian history and sheer boredom spying on other dimensions soon began to take up a good portion of her time. Oddly enough it was only around hundred years before Luna returned that she came across another Celestia. It was a rather disturbing meeting at first, and the other not having achieved her own magical sophistication fainted on arrival. Really the only saving grace was that that world's Luna was never banished, allowing her to spend time with her sister for the first time in a thousand years under a false pretense. With the time limit being how long it took her counterpart to wake from her shock induced faint.

That was the moment when her interdimensional surveillance program stopped being a simple hobby and became an addiction, especially once she figured out how to find other Equestria's. Every day she'd look at other versions of herself for hours on end, trying to see what they did wrong or right compared to herself. Sometimes it was to relieve guilt by showing just how necessary an action she regretted was. Other times it was to help her plan ahead as she looked at various worlds where an oncoming crisis had already come to pass.

After she began taking students and Luna had returned, she soon stopped focusing as much on her 5th dimensional voyeurism and began to focus on connecting with the ponies in her world. Indeed, at a certain point she wondered if she'd ever use her vast collection of scrying devices again. Until the day she found out that her world was in fact, dying and soon would be rendered uninhabitable. She tried to find a way to save the planet, even attempting to enlist the elements to help her but nothing worked. So once more she returned to her crystal balls and began to search for other Celestias in similar situations, making sure they too were on the same level as her.

More often than not what she found horrified her to the point where she spent many a sleepless night in fear of becoming what she saw. It seemed that a fair amount of Celestias were monsters, and more importantly the exact same monster. They always seemed to use the exact same ruleset, show up on a planet unannounced and with a false show of good intentions, the only hint of their true nature being a colossal barrier wall that destroyed every non Equestrian sapient or object in its path. When questioned on it by the planets inhabitants the other Celestias would obfuscate and soon offer another solution to the barrier problem. Transforming the other sapient life forms of that world, often humans, into ponies, most often in a way that destroyed them mentally, turning them into obedient slaves. Violent yet saccharine caricatures of loyal Equestrian citizens. All under the excuse of biological inferiority, or in short a genocide where lives were extinguished though hearts never stopped beating. She wasn't sure what was worse, the ones that believed in their own bullshit, or the ones that didn't.
Besides the disbelief of sinking to Genocide, Celestia soon began to realize that this was an incredibly stupid move. One utterly devoid of any understanding of the true mechanics of soft power. These other Equestrias often acted like a doomsday cult for the humans, and like most doomsday cults only the most mentally unwell or morally bankrupt joined in any significant numbers. No, every politician knew that like flies, you won more prospective subjects with honey than you won with vinegar. She had to make them actually want to come to Equestria as opposed to simply fearing the alternative, which for starters meant ditching the barrier. Instead, the growing field would be that of propaganda and examples showing just how far Equestria had come from the warring tribes to a near utopia under her leadership. If extra convincing was needed windigos could be used to sort them out and perhaps remove the most pernicious elements.

Granted the idea of using windigos was rather horrific and shameful but a justification could be made that it beat the alternative. Like the ponies of the ancient past the humans were suffering without good leadership, led instead by the greedy and the xenophobic, all while pastors preached of Gods yet only believed in earthly influence. She shuddered as she thought of all those children dying of starvation due to government incompetence, all those men and women going hungry in the streets, all those people dying of things magic could easily cure. Her heart wept for all of those unfortunates, and she knew in her heart of hearts that doing nothing to aid them was worse than doing unsavory things in their service. Besides it had worked for Equestria, and the punishment would be proportionate to their sins.

For her ponies on the other hand, she'd be framing all of this as a humanitarian mission on behalf of a poor primitive race beholden to a small class of avaricious and parasitic leaders. All while making sure to drill in that most of the humans were too primitive, abused and ignorant to be truly at fault for their actions. Instead, being misdirected by the few that held power in a couple countries. Always making sure to remind them that they too were once in a similar state before harmony had saved them.

In the midst of this she'd be sending out aid across the world, not scams meant to sling potions but actual aid. Helping humans in a way not tied to religions seeking converts but in a way that promised good in this life, or at least for their children. All while freely offering to let various states join an Equestrian federation under her leadership. Some would at first be reticent to pledge allegiance to an alien, but she held the keys to solving many of their most desperate problems. Then she'd already have a decent portion of the world's nations under her sway and an even larger proportion of the general population.
The propaganda really was the easiest bit, especially because as a neutral party with resources she'd have or rather had a lot more leeway in what she could do. Big things too, acts such as showing pegasi weather teams and earth pony farmers ending famines in Yemen and magic based clinics treating seemingly incurable patients for free in the third world. One of her proudest acts and indeed the best was to offer loving Equestrian families for any orphans or refugee children given to them. A move that not only boosted positive approvals and gave her loyal human subjects but also provided her with a chance to truly be a mother. For this act for all its cold calculation had also given her a son to love and care for, long after she had gone barren. All without worrying over inter-tribal or inter city politics, as surely whatever colt or filly there would be used as a bargaining chip to increase the groups status.
The other major problem she was sure to avoid was not letting the other races of Equestria join them. Instead, many of her counterparts chose to let them die. The blood of entire sapient races on her hooves, was something she knew she could not sleep with. Of course, dealing with potentially hostile rival nations could be tiresome and dangerous but the fact that she was their only alternative to death certainly helped. In exchange for an alliance pact, she gladly teleported various cities and towns into uninhabited areas on earth with similar climates in which they'd be allowed more or less self-governance. A few stubborn holdouts refused but most did not, and in the end that was truly out of her hooves.

On a more practical note the alliance pact contained a very clear pact that these nations and city states would assist Equestria with any battles it fought. This was a very smart move and a great insurance policy if things happened to go south. Not only did she have magic, an army of loyal subjects and a large number of humans ready to fight for better lives but other troops as well. Dragons nigh impervious to all but the heaviest of artillery fire, Griffins that could do the work of Pegasi but with the added danger of claws and beaks, and most importantly, Changeling spies and infiltrators. Infiltrators who could worm their way into the highest government positions, or leech secrets from the most secure places as easily as they breathed. Many a plan was thwarted by them as the intelligence gap soon became an impassible gulf and many disrespectful acts could be committed by them under the guise of human power players. The promise of infinite love to eat keeping most Changelings firmly on Equestria's side. Let alone what she could accomplish with Discord or the Elements.

Eventually rebellions would and did occur, though thankfully they were started by humans upset their leaders wouldn't join with her. When said governments attempted to call her out on spreading dissent, she could realistically plead innocent. Telling them that all she did was show the humans a little bit of kindness, and if that caused rebellion then it was on them for failing to do the same for their own people. Soon crackdowns began as many metropolitan areas became war zones between competing factions as the governments that refused to fold cracked down harder and harder, alienating more and more of their citizens. She was of course content to simply let Equestria offer medical aid to any injured, including those on the other side while officially remaining neutral. All while more and more of earths greatest minds in science, religion and art went on to her side.

At that point tensions had boiled over and a war began, though unlike the wars started by her inferior counterparts this one was something of a farce. More importantly an unpopular farce declared by the humans on her. Morale among human troops was at an all time low with desertion rates going through the roof, something the aforementioned massive intelligence gap and often non lethal first strikes helped with. It reached a point where a draft was in effect in many countries, one encouraged by changeling infiltrators. Many mothers and fathers joined with their draft dodging sons on that one with her policy of welcoming all surrenders with open hooves. All while the media industry that she had a massive share in continued to leak the crimes of earth's nations.

In a few years the war was over, and though the casualties were regrettable they were remarkably few for the conquest of a planet. As streets filled with those clamoring for the executions of those who once led them, something that with an overplayed heavy heart she relented to. There was guilt over what she did but not regret, she had saved two worlds and brought a level of peace unseen on both Equus and earth. Progress soared as Equestrian magic met human technology and ingenuity leading to things undreamed of by both civilizations. A new history of earth was created leading to her as the culminating savior, the final push that let the visions of all of earth's dreamers come true. Carefully making sure to remove anything that would threaten that. It was a safe world, a happy world one that she was glad Solaris, her beloved son, the boy she had just tucked in an hour earlier would grow up in along with countless other children. Never having to experience , the terror, or the gnawing hunger or any of the other myriad horrors she herself had faced as a filly in pre unification Equestria.

There were still stragglers who needed convincing and some monsters who needed to be eliminated. The idea of taking away the peace and prosperity of billions under such petty auspices as democracy, free speech, and species self determination was laughable at best and despicable at worst? Was the child thrown out of their home due to their sexual preference concerned with democracy, did the starving infant need free speech instead of food? No! All of those had simply made the problem worse at the level which they had previously been allowed! And she swore to do anything, and she did mean anything to make sure that level of suffering was never reached as she left her chambers into the castle hallway.

On her walk to the balcony she was stopped by a heavy-set man. He wasn't morbidly obese but it'd be a lie to say he didn't look like a liquid that had congealed into the contours of his suit. He bowed in an almost penguin like manner that forced her to suppress a giggle, "Vasheh velicestvo." He warbled in his throaty baritone unhelped by his accent.
"Yes viceroy Vasilev?" She gave a gentle smile to the man who controlled what had once been Russia, in hopes of clearing the look of anxiety and concern stretched taut over his wide face. Deciding to put a hoof on his shoulder for extra measure.
"Vasheh velicestvo, some of the old Calendar sects they," He froze as her face lost the smile though retained it's calculated warmth. "They say you are a false idol they are trying to incite rebellion among the oil drillers in Siberia! That you have brought cold and darkness."
She groaned internally, no what she brought was an end to global warming it was their fault that the planet healing somehow interfered with their plans to 'strike it rich'. The fact that the clergy, always an unpredictable element had become involved just made things worse. Once more she placed her hoof on his shoulder, "My dear Viceroy." She stopped still seeing the tense energy held taut within him, "Dima.", she practically crooned. "I understand your concerns but I have the utmost faith in you to handle this."
He nodded gulping, "Printsessa, what if they escalate, or see your lack of action as a sign of cowardice?" His body was still shaking causing his suit to mildly ruffle.
"Well," She chuckled, "For the latter just tell them that if they want to have a miracle contest to see if God truly is on their side I'm always willing to send a Unicorn representative. And if not, I leave this entire matter in your capable hands to deal with as you see fit."
The viceroy nodded before scurrying off with surprising speed once more leaving Celestia alone in the hallway save for her ever present cadre of armed guards. Leaving her free to look out upon the falling snow that was beginning to cover of the many Neo Canterlots across the globe, this one on the slopes of the mountains the locals called Mt. Fuji. They were late this time of year as Christmas or hearthswarming decorations had already begun to be put up. If the Viceroy needed help he could call Luna, she was currently in Berlin and always was better at dealing with... military matters if it came to that. At the moment she had her hooves busy with a complete cultural restructuring to get rid of the suicide problem faced by the country or now province's youth. It was hard and many ways of life had to be changed but she was absolutely sure it was worth it.

As she debated whether to get a hot cocoa and stroll through the palace gardens another debate raged in her mind. Today she saw a world where she lost and another where she absolutely should not have won. Would it not be right to in the words of the planets previous owners 'expand her franchise' into other Earths and Equestrias?

Author's Note

Ok so first things first, Celestia is not supposed to be a good guy in this at all in fact I wanted to make sure that people could reasonably argue for her being a villain. Though she's also meant to be contentious enough to be seen as an antihero acting in mankinds best interest. Really this fic was more of a way to explore just how and why a Celestia resembling the canon or most Non TCB Fanons depictions would take over the world.