Scourge of the land and sea!

by Vilwind

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Adventure, Romance, Comedy
Length: 1115

We are the scourge of the land and sea Beastly pirates are we.

Capitan Pipsqueak leads his buccaneers to, yet another, glorious Victory.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-09-14 09:39:51 UTC

We rob the rich, the poor; then steal a little more.

Capitan Pipsqueak stood on the deck of his frigate, the infamous 'Nightmare Moon'. Pipsqueak took a deep breath of the fresh early morning air.

He leaned back on the ship's side and sigh. Behind the Capitan stood in silence a white pegasus awaiting orders.

“They had all night to rethink my proposition,” said Pipsqueak without turning his gaze from the horizon. “Bring them up Featherweight.”

Featherweight silently nod and disappeared in the depths of the ship. He emerged after a few minutes but not alone. Behind him trotted two mares escorted by two unicorns stallions. Both mares had chains on their hooves.

“Snips, Snails,” said  Pipsqueak.” Please, release our … honorable guests from the chains.”

Snips and Snails removed the chains as ordered and stood next to the mares vigilant of their movements.

Pipsqueak looked at his prisoners. First was a earth pony mare. Her coat was light pink and her mane was pale violet with white streaks.

Diamond Tiara thought Pipsqueak, always so proud of herself. She always looks at everypony, even her friend, with those eyes full of … contempt.

Next to Diamond Tiara stood a gray mare, with cute glasses and spoon as Cute Mark.

“Silver Spoon and Diamond Tiara. Do you know why have we ponynapped you?” asked Pipsqueak.

“Because you are a moron!” Diamond Tiara started to yell. “Wait till my father hears about it! You will pay for this…!” Snips gagged Diamond Tiara with a piece of cloth.

“That will be enough Tiara,” said calmly Pipsqueak and directed his gaze upon the other mare. With a sinister smile he trotted close to Silver Spoon. The mare tried to step back but her legs were stopped by the mast of the ship. She turned her gaze back up front only to face Pipsqueak inches from her muzzle. Her eyes widened in terror.

“Silver Spoon, my love, you will not scream like Tiara will you?” asked Pipsqueak. Silver Spoon nodded staring deep into his eyes.

They stared at each other for a few seconds. Pipsqueak saw the terror in her. He could hear her heart accelerated beating.

“Silver Spoon, my love! I know that you and Tiara are spying ... thats a bad word... you gather information about the Cute Mark Crusaders. Where is their hideout? Where do they hide their booty?” he whispered the question so only Silver Spoon could hear him. His voice was soft and full of sensitivity. He could hear mares heart beating even faster.

“Their hide in …” Silver Spoon never finished that sentence because a pink hoof hit her face.

It was Diamond Tiara now struggling with Snips and Snails trying to free her muzzle from the gag.

Silver Spoon curled up and started to cry.

“Enough!” yelled Pipsqueak, and both Tiara and the stallions stopped their fighting. Pipsqueak looked at Silver Spoon and back on Diamond Tiara.

“For that you will walk the plank!” said Pipsqueak, his voice cold and harsh now.

“Wafk whaft nof?”asked Diamond Tiara through the gag, her eyes widening now.

Diamond Tiara was pushed in the direction of a single plank that leaned over the ships side into the vast ocean. She tried to resist but Snips and Snails stopped fooling around and welded their swords in weak light of levitation.

When finally Tiara stood on the edge of the plank, Pipsqueak leaned on the ships side, casually next to Snips and Snails.

“So Diamond Tiara. How will it be? Will you give me the information I need or do you want to eat breakfast with the fish today!” he asked.

“BUFK FOU!” yelled Diamond Tiara through the gag.

“Remove her gag Snips.”

“My father will have your…” yelled Diamond Tiara but never finished.

“CAPTAIN! Ship on the starboard. It’s the ‘Crusader’!” yelled Featherweight from the ship bridge.

In two jumps Capitan Pipsqueak was by his friends side. Looking into the distance. Indeed out of the early day fog came a line of a frigate. He could recognize it anywhere. It was the Crusader.

As if to confirm his thoughts he heard the battle cry coming from the distance.

“Cute Mark Crusaders Pirates! YEY!”

This was it the moment they have been waiting for. Music started a play around the ship.

“What the hell?’ whispered Diamond Tiara still standing on the plank.

Pipsqueak jumped on the reeling and yelled.

Raise the flag of piracy, sing the song of victory

Featherweight with a swift move pulled a rope hoisting a flag on the mast. Black with skull and two crossbones under it. He joined the song.

Glorious in battle are we

We’ve never known defeat, we never will retreat.

We live to hear the cannon roar,

And terror is our semaphore

Victoriously loathsome are we,

We rob the rich, the poor; then steal a little more.

Snips and Snails joined the song moving on the deck preparing canons and swords for the incoming battle.

Victory; we fight to win

Victory; is ours again

We are the scourge of the land and sea

Beastly pirates are we.

Pipsqueak jumped into the air and grabbed a rope with his teeth. He pulled the rope down with his weight. The rope hissed and unwrapped the sails.

Masters of the briny sea,

We’ll go down in history.

Courageous, we live by the sword

We deal in treachery, the kings of lechery.

Snips and Snails run towards a huge capstan at the front of the ship and started to move it.

Raise the anchor, trim the sail

We raid tonight if winds prevail

Invincible we fight to the end

United, we need no battle plan.

The wind blow and the Pirate frigate started to move.

Victory; we fight to win

Victory; is ours again

We are the scourge of the land and sea

Beastly pirates are we.

Diamond Tiara, taking advantage of the chaos on the ship deck, started to move back to the ships board side away from the edge of the plank. As if out of nowhere Pipsqueak stood in front of her.

It’s so pitiable a sight, to see them walk the plank

They squirm and cry for mercy regardless of their rank.

A loud splash of water was heard above music of the song.

Victory; we fight to win

Victory; is ours again

We are the scourge of the land and sea

Beastly pirates are we.

In that moment the school bell rang, silencing the music and the song. Ms Cheerilee stood in the school house doorway.

“Come all the recess is over…”

“But misss…”

“No Pipsqueak come … why is Diamond Tiara tied up and gagged, lying in the sandbox?”