Chapters The brief moment of respite had done little to calm my nerves.
Everything, from changing college degrees as often as I changed socks to not asking out my crush before prom night, had been direct symptoms of my inability to make decisions. It was my most crippling flaw, bar none.
And I had been asked to choose again.
My shoulders slumped as a wave of light-headedness combined with a lance of pain above my right eye to concoct the mother of all migraines.
It wasn't even supposed to be a difficult choice: right or left. There were plenty of doors in this Alice in Wonderland inspired nightmare of a castle; by the law of averages, I was bound to find some window at ground level I could squeeze out of or a proper exit.
And yet, I couldn't find the strength to move. A dark haze clouded my rational thoughts, drawing a pained groan from my lips as I fought to free myself from the chains of my indecision.
"Calm down! Everything is going to work out!" I lied while clutching my head. "You are going to be just fine!"
I couldn't refuse to play Luna's game if I was a piece on the board… and I couldn't think of a way to bend the rules to force her hand. I was stuck, and she knew it.
No, I needed to focus on the positive. Hope for the best and prepare for the worst, right? If I were playing Luna's twisted games right now, I'd imagine I wouldn't have even made it this far. The fact that I even escaped in the first place was a miracle in and of itself.
I'll need a few more of those to get out of here alive, I thought bitterly as I squeezed my eyes shut. I briefly held my breath in my congested lungs before exhaling with deliberate slowness. I then repeated this process until my breathing was slow and even.
"Alright, time to focus," I muttered quietly. In my mind's eye, an image of a half-dollar took shape. By all accounts, it was worth as much as the name suggested… but it was a keepsake—a parting gift from my grandfather during the final years of his life when there was still a spark of clarity behind his brown eyes.
I held my breath as I imagined my finger tracing across the specks of rust that caked John F. Kennedy's face.
"Right or left," I whispered with the breath I was slowly exhaling. I placed my thumb underneath the fifty-cent piece-
"Daniel!"
My blood froze in my veins.
Below me, I could hear the unmistakable echo of hooves on stone. It was a sound that I had become accustomed to; I often heard Luna's arrival long before she knocked on the door at my suite. Previously, I used said information to ground my emotions and center myself before seeing the princess.
Now, that information was doing the opposite.
I kept my eyes shut and flicked my thumb upwards.
Luna's panicked strides grew closer with each passing second.
I held my breath.
The coin fell into the palm of my hand.
Kennedy's smile greeted me.
I ran left.
I didn't know where I was by now, and I wasn't sure what I was running towards, but there was only one clear goal in my mind: I needed to put distance between myself and the distressed alicorn princess.
It was a miracle in and of itself that I hadn't come across any of the castle staff. My mad scramble for freedom was bound to grab the attention of some ironclad soldier or underpaid servant. But as I tore past what I assumed to be the servant's quarters and funneled myself down yet another obnoxiously thin hallway, I found no traces of life anywhere.
My wheezing lungs and the distant echoes of Luna's voice were the only things to break the silence that pervaded the castle.
Letting out another cough, I slowed to a jogger's pace and kept my head on a swivel. I was running out of options, but I knew that huffing and puffing like the Big Bad Wolf on death sticks would only draw unwanted attention to me.
But what if that's what she wants? I clutched a hand against my chest as I leaned against an undecorated solid grey stone wall. What if she is tracking me with a spell? Or does she have some other nasty trick up her horseshoes?
It was something that I didn't consider enough when I escaped. Luna would be the clear winner in a prolonged foot chase, and with her access to magic… this all should have been a foregone conclusion.
Was my progress up to this point a fluke? Was she toying with me?
I tried to keep my breathing level as a heightened sense of urgency begged me to push forward... but I couldn't. My lungs would give out long before my body did, and there wasn't anything I could do about it.
That fact became all the more apparent as I ducked through even more hallways and climbed another set of stairs. I was running on pure instinct—my mental fortitude had long since crumbled under the sheer adrenaline coursing through my veins, but this was a stop-gap measure at best.
So, of course, it was no surprise when I suddenly overplayed my mediocre hand.
It was foolish to assume that this castle was an infinite expanse of identical corridors... and even more foolish to think Luna wouldn't have the home-field advantage here. My desperate sprint had led me away from any possible point of refuge and out into the open.
I pivoted on the balls of my feet and rounded another corner before coming to a halt.
There wasn't any time to pause for even a moment's rest, but I was enthralled by the massive twin doors made of solid gold ahead. The darkness did little to obfuscate the runes and murals etched onto them, but I paid little attention to the various depictions of ponies, alicorns, and the duality of the sun and moon.
My mind was too busy focusing on how much of my student debt I could pay off by melting the damn thing down—
—And why I felt a brief spark of nostalgia relax my tensed muscles.
"-iel!" Her voice reverberated down the empty halls behind me. "Cease thy rash flight at once!"
My body moved into autopilot, and I instantly closed the gap between myself and what was conceivably the throne room door before slamming shoulder-first into it.
If lady luck had not been on my side that moment, I would have been little more than a writhing lump of flesh on the floor, waiting for Luna's disappointed gaze to meet mine as I succumbed to the pain.
Instead, the door parted like the red sea, and I collapsed face-first onto a red carpet.
A heavy, uncomfortable atmosphere hung over the throne room as I struggled to stand. The closest feeling I could describe was the far too-thick blanket of heat that smothered my hometown during the hottest summer days. No amount of ice cream or air conditioning could stop everyone from feeling their knees buckle as they fell to the floor and melted into the thin cracks and potholes in the pavement.
The blanket of heat that smothered me at that moment clashed against the room's aesthetic and lighting; the muted blues and greys of the walls, archways, and floors painted a much more cold and somber picture.
The stained-glass window depicting the sun behind the rightmost throne was the only reference to the insatiable heat melting off my skin.
King and Queen, I thought to myself as I pushed myself up. It's the only reason for needing two chairs, but where the hell are they? Where-
"Daniel!"
I scrambled forward.
My socks provided little grip on the polished marble floors as I sprinted off the carpet and raced towards the sun throne.
The stone floor beneath Luna's hooves shook and shuddered with each step as I crouched behind the chair and held my knees to my chest. In an instant, the humidity that preceded the room evaporated.
A combination of my nerves and an overwhelming pressure pushing down upon my chest and clamping down on my shitty lungs like a vice made breathing an uphill battle. I squeezed my eyes shut and prayed. I didn't want to feel naked under Luna's piercing gaze. I didn't want to spill out all of my secrets before that scheming bitch.
I didn't want to grovel at her f- hooves for forgiveness.
But such a reality was all but inevitable; I had no means of escape. No empty room to duck into. No servant's corridors to weave through. No strength in my battered lungs to supply oxygen to my needy body.
In layman's terms, I was fucked.
"We- I know you are here, Daniel!" Luna cried worriedly. "I will forgive you for your transgression, but you must come with me at once!"
I bit back a curse as my natural inclination told me to reveal myself. It was that sort of tone that my sister used whenever she needed to vent her frustrations and confide her secrets with one hundred percent assuredness that nothing she spoke of would leave the confines of my head.
It was almost enough to compel me to surrender.
No, do not dwell on this. The concern in her voice is nothing more than an act. I assured myself as my heart thumped away in my ears. Do not listen to a word she says.
"I promise that all will be made clear in due time," Luna's voice trailed off into a whisper.
I shivered uncomfortably in the silence that followed. Regardless of the event or the outcome, the wait was always the worst. The high school math exams I always crammed for at the last minute? The hospital visits to my comatose grandfather, who couldn't even remember my name?
The terrible grade or the sad look plastered on the nurse's face was far better than any nightmare my conscious mind could cook up when dealing with stress.
The few seconds of freedom I had left scarred me worse than all the days I spent languishing in Luna's tender mercies.
I could hear Luna muttering to herself as her hooves clicked against the polished tile once more.
"Dear lord, please… "I whispered as I hugged myself tighter. "Please don't let her take me, pl-"
CRASH
I held my breath.
One. Two. Three seconds passed.
A chilling breeze nipped at my bare skin, and the air sizzled like strips of bacon on a frying pan.
"CEASE THY FOOLISHNESS AT ONCE!" Luna commanded, and I almost felt obliged to obey; her regal voice brooked no argument.
My fear was suddenly replaced with dumb shock when I heard the massive doors to the throne room slam open.
...
It took me several long moments afterward for my brain to register that Luna was gone.
Author's Note
Sorry for the wait, school work has been kicking my ass these past few days. Up next will possibly be an interlude chapter before chapter 3, but I am still deciding on how I need to deliver it (I do have the entire story planned out, just trying to figure out how to implement things properly to make sure everything flows properly.)
Also, thank you once again UnamusedWaffle for helping with the editing!
I was unnerved by how quiet everything was.
Before, I at least had my beating heart and the heavy footsteps of the princess that provided a soundtrack to the ensuing chaos. But now? I was alone again, with only my worries and an endless list of questions plaguing my mind.
They weren’t enough to sate my curiosity.
No, I told myself firmly. Creepy shit is going down here. You know what happens to stupid teenagers in horror films and novels! They let their curiosity get the best of them, and before you know it, they suffer fates worse than death!
There was nothing to gain by following Luna and her wild goose chase, and I was unwilling to tempt fate once more. I knew there would be no second chances if she found me a second time.
I held a fist to my mouth as bile rushed up into my dried throat.
For the first time in what felt like months, I had something that I had been deprived of for so long: agency . It wasn’t enough to stop my lungs from burning like a midsummer heat or the malaise that crawled through my limbs and into my spine, but I didn’t care.
I was free , and that was all that mattered.
With that, I flung my battered carcass on top of the sun throne and sighed as the last of my adrenaline ebbed away.
There hadn’t been any need for a coin toss.
The noise had reverberated from the right side of the hallway. On top of the servant’s quarters being utterly devoid of life, nothing of value was hidden within the same copy-pasted rooms and hallways. Left was the only option.
So I trudged onwards in the dim candlelight. Before my imprisonment, I was able to survive consecutive all-nighters without sleep. Playing video games until my eyes bled or cramming for assignments were often the culprits to my abhorrent sleep schedule, but it hardly mattered. I always managed to power through fatigue and stress with enough motivation and caffeine. Somehow.
Things were different now.
Apart from the few times Luna provided me with some paper to write on, my only other form of entertainment within my cell was dreaming. I’d often find myself blacking out for stretches at a time, only to wake up in the same room again and again. Time never shifted within that isolation chamber, and my internal clock atrophied.
I bit down on my tongue once more to stay awake and alert, but it did little to reduce my overall fatigue-
-And it didn’t help me from jumping at nearly every shadow I encountered.
I couldn't tell if it was a trick of the light or just my paranoia fogging my perception of reality, but the dark reflections that danced around the candlelight were enough to raise the hairs on the back of my neck.
This fear clung onto me like an overbearing parent as I found myself within the guard's barracks. To both my relief and dismay, there wasn't a single soul in sight. However, unlike the overall tidiness of the servant’s quarters, the rooms here were little more than refuse dumps at best.
The layers of dust that clung onto the furniture were almost thick enough to plow, and that was just the beginning of it. Candle stubs, scattered papers and empty ink bottles, and general rubbish lay in haphazardly placed piles, with a couple meeting knee level.
The aroma of old polish and dust was enough to assault my sinuses, but I pushed on regardless. An army marched on its stomach, and if I was going to brave whatever hellish nightmares Luna had in store for me, I wanted to do it on a full stomach. But that begged the question: how was Luna able to feed anyone?
The decades’ worth of dust covering everything in the barracks and the lack of living people in the other wings of the castle made me feel like I wandered off set after hours. With each passing minute, I became more convinced that everything not bolted to the floor was discarded props left to rot. I sighed.
The only exception to this rule was the armory.
Unlike the decrepit offices and bunk rooms, the air seemed to taste downright sterile within the confines of the armory. Rows of polished armor flanked me on both sides upon various racks and stands, all still serviceable.
Unfortunately, none of it would help—these armor sets had clearly not been designed for human use. They had four limbs, yes, but I'd be hard-pressed to contort my body in a way that would allow me to even crawl on all fours like a beast, not that it would help me at all against Luna's witchcraft. Thankfully, I could glean insight from them—not even Luna could squeeze into the armor sets, which lent credence to the idea that other people lived here.
“Where did you all go?” I muttered, staring into the gleam from a set of polished midnight purple armor that caught my eye. This set was meant for a smaller build of pegasus and possibly the night shift if the sharp, bat-like wing protectors and the crescent moon sigil on the chest brace were any indications. If the design was meant to provide an intimidation factor, it certainly worked; I would think twice before getting into melee combat with something wearing this... small stature be damned.
My eyes drifted to the far corners of the armory.
It was also unfortunate that there were no weapons anywhere in sight. I doubted that a short sword or a spear would help much against a demi-god, but not being completely defenseless would have done wonders for my psyche.
I rubbed a hand through my matted hair, desperately thinking about what to do next.
It was becoming abundantly clear that some form of spell was warding against moisture and mildew in this room. Perhaps the same could be said for the food stores and kitchens? Luna served me three meals a day, after all, and all of that fresh food had to have come from somewhere.
With a new goal in mind, I took one last glance at the armor racks before quietly funneling out the door I came in.
Within the space of what must have been an hour, I cleared through any unlocked door that I could find within the barracks. There was little that I could find and even less that I wanted to bother salvaging.
My sinuses thanked me for fleeing from that decrepit maze as I wandered up a flight of stone stairs and into a gust of warm air.
Chalking up the strange air flows and currents to “magic,” I dragged my emaciated corpse down another hallway before I came across an unexpected but welcome surprise- the kitchens. Thankfully, there were no ponies in chef’s outfits or kitchen elves in sight to chase me off.
My dried mouth watered at the sight of fresh vegetables and fruits lining the shelves. Up to this point, I had been running on fumes- and my empty stomach was ready to tie itself into a noose around my neck if I didn’t immediately shovel whatever I could get my grubby mitts on into it.
I was more than happy to oblige.
“Just a quick snack” turned into a feast as I raided the food stores, consumed a half dozen apples, washed it all down with a few liters of coffee, and raided an honest to god fridge for butter to slather onto the sesame seed bagels I was shoving down my gullet.
As I ate my fill, I tried not to think about the worrying implications of Luna's acquiring this food and preserving it without any of the logistics required to stock a kitchen this large.
Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop
I was already moving before my mind even registered the dancing contours of the shadow in the candlelight, taking cover behind the center table and glancing around the left side of it. I could make out the shadows that hung just outside the doorway I had entered just a short while ago.
The skin on my face turned pallid, and I choked down the scream that tried to bubble up to my throat while clenching my right hand onto the edge of the tabletop.
Run. Hide.
I eyed the other entrance to the kitchen at the opposite end of the table.
Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop
Within three powerful strides, I leaped from the white tiled floor and bounded through the threshold.
Something rolled off the counter and fell onto the floor behind me.
I was always afraid of the dark.
Regardless of age and the supposed maturity that came bundled with the extra birthday candles, I was always prone to anxiety if left alone for hours on end. During the day, I would be mostly fine as I wasted the day away playing video games or raiding the snack drawer for sweets.
However, once night fell, and my eyelids drew heavy, anxiety would flood through me. I’d become jumpy, catching reflections in the movement of every window and mirror. This often drove me to keep the lights on in the hallway to my bedroom—the light that seeped in through the thin crack below the door never failed to soothe my nerves.
This time was no different.
I stared at the thin light that poked underneath the door frame with tired eyes as my racing heartbeat ebbed into a slow and steady cadence. I was no longer afraid of passing out suddenly; The copious amounts of caffeine flooding through my body would keep me up for a few hours at least, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t afraid about my newest close encounter.
It was a much-needed wake-up call. I couldn't afford to let my guard down again.
Not if she could sneak up on me like that.
I took a deep breath and cleared my mind before pressing my right ear against the door.
…
…
Nothing.
No sounds. No quiet ambiance. Just silence.
It was something that I missed dearly from home: the white noise from an overhanging fluorescent light or the creaking and popping sounds from a house settling in for the night. None of that was present here, which made everything that much worse.
I could hear a pin drop from a few rooms away in this stillness.
And I’d bet my right kidney that Luna could hear even better.
It took me a while to coax myself out of my fortress of janitor’s smocks and old mops and pry the old wooden door a smidge-
-Only to have my heart race back into sixth gear at nine thousand rpm.
“No,” I stated. “This is impossible! I would- I would have heard her! I would have seen her shadow!”
I felt disconnected; I was viewing things from behind my eyes like a video game character. It took a few minutes for the black hoof prints staining the red carpeted floor to sink in... and a few more after that to realize that the trail ended in front of the closet.
Even then… I couldn’t begin to fathom what my eyes were seeing.
I quickly grabbed one of the mops from the closet before swiping it over one of the prints. Black, tar-like goop clung to the mop's bristles, and I nearly lost my lunch on the spot from the fetid stench.
I followed the tar trail with my eyes. In my panic, I had once more thrown caution to the wind and bumbled through the castle halls like a madman. I didn’t even know what wing this was, let alone the floor.
I'm already dead, aren't I? I thought. My death grip on the mop tightened, and my sinuses protested by scratching at my throat and nasal cavity. Why is she doing this? Why didn’t she grab me here? Is this all a game to her?
I didn’t have an answer.
The last dregs of my confidence left me as I stared at the trail of hoof prints once more. What was I supposed to do? What sort of fourth-dimensional chess was she playing? Was she watching me right now?
The most frightening thing about this was that it was entirely possible. Luna could be scrying me right now, using her vast knowledge of the arcane to scare me witless, and there was nothing I could do about it.
“Luna,” My despondent voice left my lips before I could stop myself. “I- please, I beg you! Enough of these mind games! I am sorry for trying to leave, but you have to understand-”
My words fell on deaf ears.
It was a subtle change, but I immediately noticed the far end of the hallway grow dimmer with each passing second until it was completely engulfed in darkness.
A bone-chilling breeze wafted through the hall, blowing out every candle in its wake before cradling my face in its arms.
The mop I clutched like a spear fell from my clammy hands and clattered to the floor.
I spun on the balls of my feet and sprinted in the opposite direction.
Rushing, teeth chattering, frozen air billowed in my ears as my feet thundered against the carpeted and marble floor. The darkness was coming. It was coming faster than I could run.
I refused to glance back. But I knew it was there, and seeing the gaping black wall again wouldn’t help anything.
Hearing nothing but the sound of my heartbeat and the quiet fizzle of candles burning out was already bad enough. The fear that thudded away inside my skull if I was too slow only made things worse.
Another narrow hallway. The second verse is the same as the first.
A painful wheeze scratched at my throat and slipped out of my mouth, which was as dry as sandpaper. I gritted my teeth and forced my shaking legs to pick up the pace. I was going too slow.
Another fizzle. Another candle burnt out.
I was running, not sprinting, but I couldn't go faster. No matter how much I willed it, the steel rods of pain shooting through my spine and reducing my nervous system to pudding wouldn’t allow it. I couldn't go any faster if I wanted to.
And by God, did I want to.
She was trying to box me in.
Herd me like a fucking farm animal.
The intersection I had found myself in was a kill zone; Darkness had flanked me not only from behind but also from directly ahead and the hallway to my left. I turned right and tried to run faster to make up for my brief moment of pause.
I managed this for about two more minutes before the lead weights in my legs weighed me down.
Her plan had worked.
The fears of the darkness catching me, the weakness of my body betraying me as I stumbled down the path she had laid for me, or the desperate need for rest but not having time to stop—she had used all of this to play me like a fiddle, and I only realized this as I clawed my way up a flight of stairs, nearly tripping myself as one of my feet bent at an odd angle at the second-to-last step.
The cool purple and blue hues of this wing's walls blurred past me as I made one final effort to escape.
It was all futile.
The crushing weight of my doubt and weakness slowed me to a crawl. Numb legs, scorched lungs, addled brain—all of this led to one last moment of defiance.
I crashed into the solitary door at the end of the hallway before twisting its golden doorknob with the last of my strength.
I was suddenly baptized in a swathe of moonlight.
My mind was floating between the void of consciousness and dreams. It was not the first time I had felt such a sensation; I often had a few brief moments to reflect upon the strange nonsense my sleep-deprived mind conjured before the annoying tones of my alarm clock bounced off the bedroom walls.
And what a strange dream it was, I thought. My crusted eyes opened and blinked out the grogginess as I tried to sit up and get out of bed. It doesn’t matter. It’s a brand new day, and I refuse to let something as silly as a dream ruin it for me.
I squirmed and felt my limbs untangle from underneath the layers of bedsheets that clung onto me while a pale light shined into my half-lidded eyes. Suddenly, my mind screamed that something was very, very wrong.
A pattern of stars and constellations I did not recognize lined the deep blue ceiling above me.
I white-knuckled the blue bed sheets holding me captive as I shot up to a sitting position. Everything was a deep shade of blue. The polished marble floors. The walls. The ceiling. There was nothing in sight that was unblemished by this night-themed ambiance.
I felt myself be brought to a sharp awareness as I crossed past the soft moonlight spilling into the room and twisted the golden handle of the wooden door.
It refused to budge.
I shook my head and twisted the knob again.
It refused to budge.
I grasped both hands onto the handle and pushed down with all the force I could muster.
It. Refused. To. Budge.
“No! Let me out! LET ME OUT! ” I pounded on the door and screamed. “Please!”
I kicked at and slammed my body into the door frame like a child having a tantrum because that's what this all felt like. For a moment, I was that same terrified little boy again. I...
This can’t be happening!
My eyes darted towards the window at the far side of the room.
No! No! NO!
Death was preferable to wasting away again, but it was a last resort. I- there had to be a way out! A means of escape! I couldn't-
I turned towards my left.
Shelves of books written in Luna’s indecipherable language lined the walls.
Crazy rich people always had secret tunnels and hidden rooms! I just needed to find the right lever or switch! I thought to myself as I glided over to the bookcases and began to touch, grab, and toss away every book on the shelf.
With each book clattering to the floor, my hope diminished.
Ten. Fifteen. Thirty. An entire shelf worth of books was scattered haphazardly in my wake. I rubbed my hands against the insides of the empty shelf, feeling for a button or some mechanism that I knew was there .
Two shelves. Three.
“Where is it?” My feverish eyes scrutinized every speck of dust on the shelves.
My nostrils flared.
“Where is the goddamn switch?! ?” My arms swept up another shelf full of books and smashed them onto the marble floor. Heat coursed through my body, and I could only see red as I threw Luna’s prized leather books in every direction.
There was no switch. No passage that would let me get out of here. My anger didn’t make me feel powerful. The coiled strength of my muscles couldn’t be aimed at the target of my ire, and I hated every moment of it.
The worst part of it all? Luna was watching every second of this. She was reviling in my despair from some ivory tower, and I couldn’t do anything to stop it.
My eyes lingered towards the window, and my breathing hitched.
It was my only option. I didn’t know how high the jump was, but I didn’t care.
I was done.
The crumpling of paper echoed off the still deep blue walls like my Dad on a Sunday morning, thumbing through the interesting sections of the newspaper. But the only news that would be shown this time around was the untimely death of a trapped and scared little boy.
"Just a few more steps..." I muttered to myself.
The trick to telling a convincing lie is believing the diarrhea foaming out of your mouth while you spew it. Was Luna going to let me go that easily? Would she let me plummet to my death before ripping even that choice away from me?
Was this just another game of hers?
The weight of my shame anchored my chin to my chest, and I stared down at my feet, and the loose sheets of paper crumpled underfoot like autumn leaves.
This wasn’t me.
I hated this uncontrollable frustration that I couldn’t vent. I hated having no one to confide in. I hated giving up.
My foot dragged across the floor lazily and brushed against the leather sea of books that almost reached up to my knees. With a flick of my ankle, the towers of books toppled, allowing them to fly open like a kaleidoscope of butterflies.
What?
My heart stopped for a split second, and I forced myself to glance back at the books again.
Between all of the chicken scratch and the indecipherable squiggles…
Something stood out to me.
I crouched on my weary knees and snatched the offending page into my sweaty palms.
I never thought that relaxing could be so stressful. The suite was easily larger and fancier than any room in the entire apartment complex, and yet, staring up at the ceiling, I found myself unable to tear my thoughts away from-
There were others. I thought darkly. I wasn’t the only one.
I haphazardly tossed away the paper into a new separate pile in favor of another one I snatched up from the ground. My eyes darted across the worn page.
I had that same dream again.
The one where the four claustrophobic walls of my room shift and constrict upon me like an insect in a Venus fly trap. Luna assured me that she would stop these nightmares if I let her into my dreams, but I just-
I couldn’t do it.
Every fiber of my being screamed at me to run away and hide at the mere sight of her, and my extended stay in her castle hadn’t changed that one bit. Hell, I don’t think I’ll ever get acclimated to her presence. The hairs on the back of my neck always stand on edge whenever she’s near.
She had asked me that same question nearly every visit to my cell, like clockwork. And I always refused, like clockwork. It’s good to see that I wasn’t the only one to sniff out her bullshit.
Without another thought, I threw the paper aside and pulled another one up from the sea of chaos.
I was so tired. Not a day goes by that I don’t miss my family and the life I left behind.
If I had a shoulder to cry on or a whole new world to explore… I might not have fallen into that rut. Perhaps I could have even cast these thoughts plaguing my mind aside. I was not some old dog that couldn’t learn new tricks. Nor was I some bitter old man who refused to embrace change.
But this?
What has that witch given me besides a stuffy prison cell?
My unfocused gaze lingered upon the page in my shaking hands. I wasn’t the only one. I- I wasn’t alone in suffering in this nightmare. A shallow, defeated laugh crawled its way out of my throat as I traced my thumb against the faded page.
It wasn’t empathy or any other feeling I could place.
This sensation was almost... nostalgic .
Wait…
Frantically, I fished around one last time in the torrent of dead trees and pulled up another page.
The words weren’t coming to me.
It’s funny, really. I’ve been flung across space and time, come face to face with an alicorn princess, and now I was living it up inside a suite that was likely worth more than my old college tuition.
But there I was, shaking like a leaf with a quill in hand like I was stuck at my mandatory creative writing class.
Perhaps it was my nerves or even excitement? Who else had ever made contact with an alien species like this? Or got to explore a new world? Regardless, I think this bit of R&R is exactly what the doctor ordered.
I would be lying if I said I wasn’t afraid of the ass-chewing I'm going to get for missing my shift. Assuming I still have a job-
My eyes darted between the lines of text scrawled upon the yellowed page and then back to the pile I made.
The squished a’s. The curved hooks of the g’s and y’s as though they’re cursive—the neat spacing.
This was my handwriting.
Author's Note
I apologize for the delay.
I had to rewrite this chapter along with studying for midterms, and I don't think I'll be able to pick up the pen again until next week. In the meantime, I hope you enjoy it!
Once again, I need to give a shout-out to Unamused Waffle and newbie for proofreading / editing!
I could only stare at the page.
All of them were as alien to me as the constellations painted upon Luna’s ceiling, but I couldn’t deny the facts.
I wrote these.
No matter how many times I frantically re-read over the lines, I couldn’t fill in the apparent gaps in my memory. It wasn’t even that I was suppressing them; I had enough of those that I stashed away like a box of Christmas decorations during the summer. It was only after I carefully organized them into a semi-coherent timeline that it struck me.
Was Luna erasing my memories?
It was something that I had never considered, even with my constant refusals of her offers to stop the nightmares. I was foolish to think that my consent was enough to stop her from tampering with my mind.
I carefully combed through my paper trail with as much focus as my sleep-deprived brain could muster.
There were at least two possible “beginning” instances, which lent credence to my theory. Things after that became more muddled, which also painted a rather dark picture in my mind as the thoughts and ramblings that I committed to each page seemed to repeat themselves.
Everything from the ghostly visages of my family haunting my dreams to the fears of me forgetting their voices frightened me to no end, but the idea of being subjected to this recursive torture was terrifying.
The worst part was knowing that I had no way to stop this.
Her power was limitless, and I was no David.
I could not slay this Goliath.
I brought a shaking hand to my forehead and let out a quiet whimper.
Luna would not let me remember any of this. As soon as she marched through that door, I’d be a naive fool once more that clung to her every word. I would stay in my room like a good little pet and patiently wait for a family reunion that would never come. At some point, a voice inside my head would scream at me.
It would point out and pick at Luna’s web of lies until it collapsed under its weight, and I would be back here, writing out my epitaph with the hope that some future me would stumble upon it-
-Only for the cycle to repeat once more.
There is a way out.
A blanket of warmth enveloped me as I turned my head to stare at the window.
A few strikes from a chair or one of the substantially thick volumes scattered around would crack the glass like an egg, but I was hesitant at the idea.
I was deathly afraid of heights. Everything from roller coasters to the slippery wooden stairs in my parent's basement always caused my breathing to hitch while everything around me crawled to a standstill. It was an irrational fear, but the idea of losing balance while having that weightless feeling crawl into my gut was enough to dissuade me from many outdoor activities.
Ever so slowly, I crept over to the windowpane, ignoring my broken reflection all the while.
But as I tried to refocus my vision to see past the glass, the blinding shine from the moonlight stopped me, forcing a hand to come up and shield my eyes.
Just close your eyes and take a deep breath.
“It can’t be this simple.” I touched my free hand against the cool glass and felt my fingers tingle with numbness. Luna was going to rip the rug from underneath me. I knew she could, and right now? She didn’t have a reason not to.
Perhaps it was the result of Luna moving the goalposts so many times already, or it was my own weakness, but I stepped away from the window.
The numbing frost chewing at my fingers subsided a few seconds later, allowing me to curl my fingers into a fist. I tried to breathe, but my breath turned into a shudder. It didn’t matter how many iterations I suffered through- or how many more Luna would subject me to.
I would never be able to make that choice.
I ignored the heat tugging at my back as the weight of my choice dawned upon me.
You know what will happen, don’t you? And unlike your grandfather, you won’t have post-it notes plastered around every surface to remind you about the people who love you!
“No,” I whimpered. “That- “
You will not survive this. The only difference is the method of execution.
“Stop this!” My tears evaporated before they could finish trickling down my face. I felt like I was boiling alive.
But you can take solace in the fact that there is another option. One to end the endless. Stop the inevitable.
I remembered the smell of fresh morning dew that wafted in through the window to the hospital room and the cramped, sterile white walls that made everything feel far too cramped for comfort. There was nothing there on that bed, even though the steady rise and fall of something's chest underneath the bedsheets suggested otherwise.
A pair of dull green eyes stared right through me.
I stared back and saw nothing more than a ghost.
…
He didn’t remember my name.
I felt something tug at the back of my sweat-stained shirt.
To be brave is to be afraid. You have already done more than most others could hope for in such a situation.
I tried to ignore the traitorous thoughts swimming through my mind, but it was a war of attrition that I was losing with each passing second.
But now it is time to rest. Let us put an end to this pointless-
I heard the unmistakable echo of hooves on stone in the hallway outside.
Hide.
I was suddenly cold again as I frantically swam past the ocean of books in a mad scramble to find a hiding spot.
The doorknob began to turn with a soft click-
-But something stopped it.
My heart skipped a beat as the knob began to twist again, only to become stuck in place as if someone was holding onto it firmly on my side of the room.
Without hesitation, I flung myself to the floor before crawling under Luna’s bed.
It was honestly like something I saw out of a movie once: A scared child steals their abusive parent's belt before hiding under a bed, and the parent hollers their name all the while. My ears rang as Luna acted out her role.
“Daniel! Open this door at once!!” Luna shouted. There was an undercurrent of concern and urgency that bled into every syllable. “I know you are in there!”
The vibrations from the doorframe shaking caused my bones to rattle, which did little to help me in my vain attempt to bottle up my fear and emotions.
“I do not have time to play games! You must come with me at once!” Luna spoke again, her voice sending shivers down my spine.
Why isn’t she just teleporting inside? I thought as her feverish attempts to break into her own room intensified. What’s stopping her?
Then as soon as it began, her attempts at breaching the door ceased, leaving a dead silence.
I remained still. Things were never this simple whenever Luna was involved, and I refused to get caught off guard. It was for this reason that I was able to temper my reaction to the eerie blue glow that engulfed the room.
Just stay calm. Breathe.
“I know not of the madness that has befallen you, Daniel,” Luna’s iron-shod hooves clip-clopped just a few feet away from the edge of the bed. “I have shown you naught but kindness and understanding, and this is how you repay us? With temper tantrums and mistrust?”
Burning. I was on fire. My teeth clamped down onto my chapped lips, and my skin felt like it was sunburnt.
“We will have words when this is all over, my child. But first,” Luna’s hooves moved towards the opposite wall from the window, and I could hear her magic open the door to the closet. “I must ensure that you are safe.”
“Ah…” Luna spoke with that same fucking motherly tone. “There is but one place left for you to hide.”
Warning bells sounded off in my skull, but I couldn’t do anything other than keep my eyes glued to Luna’s hooves as she began to march towards the bed.
What do I do? I can’t get out from under the bed and reach the door in time!
It was already too late.
She was at the edge of the bed.
Sunspots filled my suddenly blurred vision, and I thought my skin was going to peel off from the bone.
Do not move a muscle.
What?
“It is time for your folly to end,” a blue-furred muzzle poked underneath the bed, and I stared into her bright turquoise eyes with abject horror. “You- what?”
“What manner of sorcery is this? Daniel?” I winched at Luna’s surprised shout and then stared dumbfounded as Luna’s eyes darted around. It was almost as if she couldn’t see me directly in front of her.
What is going on?
I continued to stare back at Luna with wide eyes. The way her ears folded onto the sides of her head and twitched was more reminiscent of a puppy with separation anxiety than a powerful alicorn princess. It was an apt description of the princess' actions thus far, and the trembling of her lips and the glassy, glazed look forming in her eyes only further spurred a sense of pity out of me.
I was thankful that it was just a fleeting moment; The last thing I wanted was to develop any form of Stockholm Syndrome.
A few more tense moments passed before she pulled her head away from underneath the bed. Not a second later, Luna started to hyperventilate.
“Nay, I will not fail thee again!” Luna shrieked furiously. “I cannot!”
“DANIEL !” Her hooves slammed into the ground hard enough to spring the scattered books into the air and cause specks of dust to fall from the ceiling. It took all of my willpower not to scramble out from my hiding spot and flee.
I held my breath as my body suddenly turned cold, and my extremities tingled with numbness.
Come and find me.
…What?
BANG
My ears rang like church bells as wooden splinters showered the princess' room. The smell lagged behind by a second; It was reminiscent of one of the many bonfires my friends would invite me to during the long nights of the summer.
“DECEIVER! MISCREANT!” Luna slammed an iron-clad hoof onto the ground once again. “YOU WILL NOT TAKE HIM FROM ME!”
The air popped like Rice Krispies cereal in a bowl of milk, and Luna disappeared from view.
Then all hell broke loose.
If the last explosion was equivalent to a frag grenade going off, the aftereffects echoing off the walls in the hallways outside were nothing short of an artillery barrage. With each discordant boom, the castle shook on its foundation.
The curtains to Luna’s window tore loose from their holster and glided through the air like a leaf in a tornado. The haphazardly scattered books shot into the ceiling like a load of buckshot. The closet groaned in agony as its doors shot open- vomiting its varied and once neatly stacked articles of clothing and other assorted boxes onto the floor.
Then, nearly as soon as it started, the battle stopped.
Silence reigned.
It took me more time than I’d personally admit regaining my bearings.
The small space underneath Luna’s bed was the closest thing I had in ages to a safe zone; It stopped the irate alicorn from discovering me and protected me from her hate-fueled rampage. Squeezing out from underneath my small hidey-hole was nerve-wracking, but I forced myself out onto the floor before pushing myself up and onto my feet.
Having a goal in a stressful situation like this should have been extraordinarily helpful. It would have given me something to distract me from the cold reality of this situation. The keyword being “should ”. The goal my unseen benefactor gave me was about as vague and unhelpful as my half-baked schemes.
The only difference between the two was my critical lack of agency. I had to seek out this warmth, or else I’d be completely defenseless.
I kicked a book into the crater that Luna stomped into the floor before sidestepping around it.
Just a few hours ago, Luna’s room was the picture that was paired alongside the definition of luxury in the dictionary. Now, however? The bedroom almost looked as bad as I felt, and it was far enough away from whatever shit went down outside in the hallway.
And you called my mess a temper tantrum, Luna?
Putting aside my empathy for a fucking bedroom, I tiptoed and hopscotched past piles of sprawled out clothes and useless knickknacks before stopping within reach of Luna’s closet. I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t my greed that guided me through this trash heap instead of booking it for the exit, but it was perhaps one of the only good decisions I made in the past twelve hours.
It wasn’t a flashlight, but the idea of being able to provide my own source of light calmed my frayed nerves, and I gingerly plucked the offending golden chamberstick off the ground.
It was deceptively heavy for its size, and it probably could be used as an impromptu cudgel if the need arose, but that hardly mattered to me. I hopefully wouldn’t need to use this for anything other than its intended purpose.
A few minutes of sifting through the chaotic mess yielded another valuable find: sulfur head matches and a bottle of phosphorus. Sure, they weren’t nearly as convenient as friction-based ones, but I couldn’t afford to complain.
I carefully rubbed a match head into the phosphorus mixture, rubbed it on top of the cork stopper, and lit a candle. The smell of the first bloom on a garden of flowers wrapped around me, and I took a moment to close my eyes and breathe.
Long, grueling hours sitting in a cramped cubicle and all of the responsibilities I needed to balance on my shoulders had left me with far too little free time. And with my dwindling free time, I found my sense of creativity and wonder dulling with it.
Before this, before everything that Luna has done to me… when was the last time I truly lived?
I frowned. I couldn’t remember. It was like trying to solve a puzzle with missing a third of the pieces. It wasn’t just about trying to prove a negative. There was nothing there but gaps.
I fail to prove a negative and instead behold absence.
My thoughts froze.
How much else did I forget? What else has that witch stolen from me?
I swallowed, and an excessive flood of saliva scratched at a lump in my throat. The other puzzle pieces had their colors faded into shades of grey. I could remember the bare white walls of my apartment, a few lines in the lyrics to Don’t Fear the Reaper , and the perfect blend of sugary sweetness from a slice of apple pie I had bought from the local bakery prior to my kidnapping, but I knew that there was more.
There had to be more than just random footnotes in my memories. Where were the happy memories? The birthday parties? The vacations? The slow memories where I didn’t realize I was living the good times until I looked back upon them in retrospect?
Where-
I subconsciously reached for an albuterol inhaler in my pocket that didn’t exist as a short bout of wheezing clawed me back down into reality.
No. It’s time to focus.
My breathing slowed, and I tried to keep it as even as possible despite my sudden asthma attack. A few repetitions later, I was able to get my lungs in control long enough to wade through the mess in Luna’s room and approach the doorway.
With all the hesitancy of terrified prey emerging from their hiding spot, I poked my head out into the hallway. I swiveled my gaze around, desperately searching for any uncertain movements lurking in the darkness. Several heart-pounding moments later, I sighed a breath of relief and extended my arm, letting the light from the candlelight spill into the hallway like a can of spilled paint.
I was not able to get a good look at where I was going before I got locked into the bedroom, but there was no denying that the holes that perforated the purple-colored walls were recent additions.
But that wasn’t the thing that drew my attention. No, it was the black smears and blots that coated them. They more closely resembled bloodstains, and I resisted the urge to puke once more as the familiar terrible stench overpowered the candle’s gentle springtime scent and sucker-punched my sense of smell.
Author's Note
I am truly sorry for the long wait! We are getting close to the meat and potatoes for this fic, so stay tuned!
I was a heavy sleeper.
It was a curse that I had to grin and bear during my formative years; my mother always had trouble shooing me out the door on time for the morning bus, and at least eighty percent of the challenge stemmed from pulling me away from the world of dreams.
Now, though?
It was a blessing. Granted, the infernal klaxons of my alarm clock were loud enough to rouse the dead, but at least I had control over when I woke up. Noise pollution was a bitch, and living smack dab in the middle of the city with thin walls was a recipe for disaster.
There was one downside, besides the obvious ones, however. My dreams were… strange at best. Frequently, I would wake up with the dying embers of some potent emotion that made my stomach churn and my body drenched in sweat. It was a phenomenon that started to occur after-
After? After what?
The answer was on the tip of my tongue, but I just-
-I couldn’t remember.
My eyes reluctantly opened, and I blinked out the grogginess as my mind floated between dreams and consciousness. I was exhausted, but this was an unfamiliar flavor of it. It was less of a ‘running on fumes’ sort of fatigue that I was unfortunately accustomed to and more of an ‘I just sprinted a full marathon.’
My aching bones felt like someone had used them as an impromptu xylophone and the tinge of fear still scraping at my chest did little to help matters.
I doubt my shitty insurance will cover whatever the hell this is. I squirmed underneath my blankets. The dull aches and pains promised to make today completely unbearable. Melatonin and NyQuil just aren’t cutting it.
However, I heard a noise when I tried to filter out the incoherent dribble floating inside my headspace from my current train of thought.
It was too soft to be the blaring tone of my alarm, but it was too loud to be something of no consequence.
I sighed.
My head was still swimming with drowsiness as I tried to sit up and get out of bed. Like every other morning before this one, I could always count on the sight of my apartment bedroom to provide me with some comfort, even if that felt fleeting in the face of my current symptoms.
My bleary eyes opened wider, and I noticed my iPhone vibrating on my nightstand, the sight strangling the kaleidoscope of butterflies that fluttered in my stomach and washed away whatever spiritual residue my night terror had afflicted me with.
It was all just a dream, Daniel. Get ahold of yourself.
Gingerly, I stretched out my left arm and pawed at my phone before collapsing back into bed.
“Even the prank callers are feeling lazy today, it seems,” I spoke aloud. “I mean, seriously? Unknown Caller? At least spoof a local number before trying to sell me an extended car warranty on my museum piece.”
My tired eyes lingered on my phone’s screen for a few more seconds before the call abruptly ended, and my patience was awarded a glimpse at the local time: 4:28 am, Wednesday, June 23. Three hours too early for work, three hours too late to fall back asleep.
Fucking insomnia.
When I blinked once more and my cluttered apartment came into focus, I resisted the urge to dig my face into my pillow and scream as I continued to stare at the wallpaper of my lock screen. It felt like a lifetime ago, yet it seemed like it was yesterday that I went on that trip.
It had been a foggy, soaking evening that day. I distinctly remembered the splashing of my shoes on the rainswept sidewalks as I traversed the busy streets of New York City with my friends.
Out of all the pictures I took on that trip, I could never understand why I used this one as the background for my lock screen. It didn’t feature any familiar faces or any of the famous landmarks that attracted starry-eyed tourists to them like a moth to a flame. Hell, I probably took more photos of that trip than there were grey and black vans immortalized in this single frame.
But something stood out in this one, and it wasn’t the way that the golden rays from the headlights reflected off the wet surface of the paved road or the ever-encompassing fog that obfuscated my view past the first seven or so buildings like a PlayStation One title.
It was something else. Something that I needed to remember dearly, but couldn’t.
I reached out, pulled the cord for my lampshade, and winced as the room became bathed in light. Rubbing my eyes, I allowed myself a moment to adjust to the sudden change in the ambiance while also yawning into my hand.
“Fucking Wednesdays,” I winced a bit at the aches and pains reasserting themselves now that I was fully immersed in the waking world again. I completely empathized with people and their vehement hate for Mondays, but where was that same hate for Wednesdays?
They were too far away from the weekend but close enough to make the week feel like it was dragging on forever. It didn’t help that I usually ended up swamped with work obligations around Wednesdays, either.
Speaking of my busy schedule- what even is happening this week?
I tried to recall what I would expect at work today or anything that happened in the past week, but I didn’t come up with anything. It was almost as if entire chunks of my memory were misplaced or just missing entirely.
Were my dreams really messing with me this badly?
I didn’t have an answer to that.
And even if I did, would it matter? I was no closer to solving these issues now than I was whenever this all started. Perhaps it was even worse than I feared? What if this was a repeat occurrence? A cycle? One where I was doomed to suffer through these dreams over and over again just to forget-
No, Daniel. Just take a deep breath, and focus. It was just a bad dream. Nothing more.
My chest tightened, causing my lungs to constrict as I half-coughed-half-wheezed instead of breathing normally. I brought my right hand to my mouth and clenched it into a fist while blindly reaching out towards my nightstand with my left.
It took me a few more painstakingly long moments before I clasped my hand onto my emergency inhaler, placed my lips around the mouthpiece, and pressed down on the canister, allowing its aerosol drug propellant to do its work on my worthless lungs.
Another moment passed, and I collapsed back onto my bed.
It’s been hardly five minutes, and I already feel absolutely done with today.
It was a sentiment that I was almost one hundred percent able to agree with, but something seemed wrong with that. The idea of throwing in the towel so soon made me feel more ill now than during my sudden asthma attack.
And the angel on my shoulder is right. I have a place to myself. I can afford my own meals. I’m in no danger of being evicted, and my folks are fine.
I stared up at the bare white ceiling of my apartment and sighed. The urge to call my parents came to the forefront of my mind and I considered rummaging through my twisted-up bedsheets for my phone before deciding against it. I doubted that they would appreciate me waking them up this early in the morning.
A short bout of sullenness coursed through me in the silence that followed. I missed them. It wasn’t just this dream nonsense that spurred this thought, either. I wanted nothing more than to call in sick and surprise my parents.
But there was never enough time.
The daily grind all but sucked out chunks of my soul with each passing day, and I couldn’t find it in myself to do anything more than just collapse onto my bed in a crumpled heap after each grueling day. Hell, I can’t remember the last time I cooked an honest-to-god meal for myself, let alone do anything else beyond the bare necessities to keep my place somewhat hygienic.
Perhaps this is a wake-up call? Besides, when was the last time I took any time off?
The muffled chime of my phone’s ringtone was a blessing in disguise as I stripped the covers off my body and twisted the blanket. My iPhone landed on top of the white bedsheet cover with a quiet thud, but not before I grimaced at the idea of these spam callers loading my voicemail with pointless junk.
I massaged my temples.
“These assholes seem rather persistent today,” I grumbled. While waiting for the call to end was not as flashy or fun as stonewalling a scammer for hours on end, I didn’t have the mental energy to deal with this bullshit. It also didn’t help that answering calls like these tended to have more like them flood in within a few days, in my experience.
A few more seconds passed, and my phone went silent again.
They left a voicemail this time.
Six taps on the screen and a swipe of my finger left me glaring down at my phone screen.
Fifty.
My jaw clenched.
Fifty fucking voicemails from the same ‘unknown caller,’ and yet I somehow slept through all but two of them?
The idea of somehow sleeping through all of that noise was rather alarming. Sure, my sleep schedule wasn’t interrupted, but even with a whole night's rest, I felt like I had a foot in the grave. But that begged the question: Shouldn’t I have woken up from all that noise, heavy sleeper or not?
My thumb hovered over the last voice message, and I reluctantly pressed the speaker button and allowed the message to play out.
…
Nothing.
No static, no message about extended car warranties or Nigerian Princes. Just complete silence.
How frustrating-
-Daniel! Daniel!
The voicemail abruptly ended.
…What?
I increased my phone's volume before playing the same message again. Silence, followed by-
-Daniel! Daniel!
The quality was too poor to tell who it belonged to, but it had a cadence that would be befitting of a woman or a child. I had an inkling that I recognized the voice, a nagging in the back of my head, but the truth continued to elude me.
I played two more messages through my phone’s speakers after that.
All three were twenty-three seconds long, with a long silent pause before the voice became barely audible at the twenty-one-second mark. My foot bounced on the hardwood floor. The fourth and fifth were the same.
I scrolled down.
I played back messages seven and eight. Twenty-three seconds.
All of them were twenty-three seconds.
All of them were carbon copies of each other.
All of them mentioned me by name.
I turned to my nightstand, eager to catch sight of my headphones. Empty.
No wallet, house keys, car keys, or headphones.
Even my inhaler is missing. What’s going on?
I spun around.
I was no compulsive hoarder, but I would have been lying if I had said that my modestly sized apartment wasn’t a complete mess. Boxes with old keepsakes and mementos fought savagely against piles of clothes for breathing room inside my closet, posters were slapped over whatever bare spot on the walls I could find, and entire shelves filled with my aged collection of video games and films collected dust next to the fifty-inch tv that I hardly ever used anymore.
That was all gone now.
The sound of my footsteps seemed deafening on the wooden floor as I inspected every last nook and cranny of my room.
Apart from the bed I had slept in and the nightstand that stood next to it, I couldn’t find a single possession I owned. The white walls of the room were barren. There was no mess piled up in my closet. There were no furnishings apart from the bed I slept in and the nightstand that accompanied it.
There was one thing resting on the empty brown wood stand, however.
A solitary, golden photo frame adorned with a tacky flower pattern alongside the edges.
I plucked the photo off the desk and scraped my finger alongside the metal edge of the frame, caking my appendage in a layer of dust that made my eyes water. I sat at the edge of the bed, and my mind went blank.
I don’t recognize these people.
And it wasn’t for lack of trying; my mind was already frazzled by my nightmares, these random voicemails by some stranger who knew my name , and now this .
I had no reason to rip a stock photo of a happy family off Google and place it on my nightstand. Therefore, these people must have meant something to me. So, if that was the case… what was it? Who were they?
There had to be a reason I had a photo of these four strangers on my nightstand instead of a family photo.
The tall, grey-bearded man was the first on the docket. I drank in all of his physical appearances, from the way his olive skin looked oily to touch and his curly grey hair to the cool blue eyes that, upon further inspection, showed the disappointment that his joyful smile tried to mask.
Was it self-loathing? Nihilism? Both?
The woman standing next to him was completely out of his league. While he looked like a drunkard cursed with sobriety, she looked like she was perfect. Unlike his casual grey short shirt and pants, which stretched out over his portly figure, her masterfully hand-crafted navy blue three-piece suit fitted her form perfectly. Her finely combed golden hair flowed behind her, kept healthy with the priciest conditioner and products on the market. The pair of dark-framed Ray-Ban's that hid her deep green eyes was the cherry on top that completed her distinct image.
I scrutinized them for a few more seconds before moving on to the two children in the photo, and my gaze became slightly unfocused as my breathing slowed.
Apart from the boy’s blue eyes, they took from their mother’s side of the family. Sun-kissed yet pale skin, bright smiles, and vibrant eyes sparkled with unadulterated joy as she hugged him close with an arm draped over his shoulder.
I closed my eyes as sounds, smells, and glimpses of warmth flickered through my mind. I couldn’t place my finger on where I remembered these sensations or if I had ever experienced them myself.
My eyes started to prickle with tears.
What was I doing? Was I really feeling nostalgia and projecting over a photo of some strangers I’ve never met or will meet? Enough of this, Daniel. That photo is probably some calling card from the sick fuck that robbed us in our sleep! So get off your ass and call the cops already!
“Okay,” I whispered before rubbing my stinging eyes. It was nearly impossible to keep my panic response under control, but I managed to keep my beating heart at a more steady rate than triple digits.
Regardless, I was still at a loss as to how this happened. Shouldn’t the other tenants have seen something suspicious? It’s one thing to steal valuables like jewelry or cash before slinking into the night, but to take even the things nailed to the floor without making a scene? It was downright impossible.
The worst thing about all of this? I knew it wasn’t a nightmare. Unless I was suffering from some delusional episode, which was becoming increasingly possible with each passing second, all of this was real. The pain and stress I felt were too vivid to be something my mind could conjure up whole cloth, and I had no frame of reference for what having a psychotic break felt like.
Either way, I was utterly powerless. There was no one to help me, and doing nothing but waiting for my situation to change was not an option.
I needed to take action now.
I tossed the blank photo frame off to the side of my bed and snatched at my phone with the full intention of calling the cops, but I quickly ran into a minor issue.
I couldn’t unlock my phone.
Entering my phone’s passcode was something I never needed to think about; it was an automatic function like breathing. But no matter what I tried, the damned thing wouldn’t accept my password.
I didn’t forget the combination.
I know I didn’t- It was so simple! I know my passcode!
I. Know. My. Passcode.
So why can’t you unlock your phone then, genius?
I sat dumbly on the edge of my bed, staring at the four hundred dollar paperweight in my hands. One swipe upwards. Six taps on the screen. Failure.
I tried again.
One swipe upwards. Six taps on the screen. The still image of that rainy day in New York taunted me.
None of this made sense.
Nothing made sense.
One swipe upwards-
Knock Knock
My soul nearly left my body as I tumbled face-first onto the floor, my phone clattering to the ground just a foot ahead of me. I laid still on the hardwood, utterly confused, as I held my breath.
…
Was that just my mind playing tricks on me? Or-
Knock Knock Knock
I shifted my body and turned. The light that always seeped in through the thin crack below the door was gone.
Something in my stomach fluttered as my mind raced, searching for an answer that only led to more questions.
Who was at my door? And for that matter, how did they get into my apartment? What’s going on?
I wanted to call out, but fear gripped me with its icy talons, and I stared at the thin crack below the door like a deer in headlights. It was as if the darkness that engulfed the world outside my room was shifting, its features indecipherable.
I gagged as I all but tasted the stench of pennies and gasoline.
Knock
They were-
Knock
What is going on?
Knock
Who is at my door?
Knock
Where? Where am I? What is this place?
VVVRRRRIIIINNNNNGGGG!
BANG
BANG
BANG
The door was shaking. Why was it shaking? Who is at my door?
VVVRRRRIIIINNNNNGGGG!
BANG
Why am I so scared?
BANG
My phone vibrated on the floor behind me.
BANG
Black tar started to ooze from underneath the door.
With shaking hands, I reached out toward it and brought it up to my face. I didn’t bother to check the caller ID.
“...wake up, Daniel! Please!”
“...Sarah?”
The door flew off its hinges.
“Daniel!”
The sudden cold drove the air from my lungs.
I choked.
The last of my precious air escaped in bubbles.
I tried to struggle.
Sleep.
But I was so tired.
My limbs and joints were frozen down to the bone, and I couldn’t move a single muscle in my body.
Go to sleep.
I opened my eyes. Black. I shut them again.
“Daniel!”
Go to sleep, my child.
A dozen bells discordantly chimed in the distance. Beneath the hideous cacophony of clashing sounds, I could hear my struggling heartbeat thu-thumping in my chest. It was becoming quieter with each passing second.
Help! Help me! Please!
I sputtered. A thick, viscous glue shot up my nose as I reflexively inhaled. The taste of pennies and gasoline slathered itself onto my tastebuds. I tried to jerk my head up, but my body was frozen in place.
Be not afraid, my child. This will be naught but a nightmare before long.
I frantically clung to my consciousness as my burning lungs failed to get oxygen.
I don’t want to die!
I fought for air, fought to move my body, fought against the siren call of sleep-
Ringing chimes in my head. Pounding in my lungs. The last vestige of warmth in my freezing heart started to fade. The burning in my lungs grew hotter. Spite, my will to live, my fear of death… none of it was enough to fight back against the heaviness in my limbs and the fading of my conscious mind.
I was going to die. I was going to be nothing more than a sodden, bloated corpse. Would anyone ever know what happened to me? Would they know that I didn’t choose to leave? That I didn’t abandon them?
Heavy, everything was so goddamn heavy. My muscles were too weak and atrophied, like an elderly man on his deathbed.
It was so hard to stay awake.
To stay alive.
Help me-
Something loomed above me in the darkness. I could not see but still felt its presence above my other failing senses.
Thy panic is meaningless; thou will be safe with us forevermore.
More slime rushed down my throat. My lungs had given up, and my mouth reflexively opened. The burning of my lungs turned to that of napalm. Fading, pleading, the banging pains in my head, the ceaseless black.
The burning and the cold were too much.
Something snaked around me. Soft. So soft.
I couldn’t- I just-
I want to go home!
Thou are home, my child.
“Stay away from him, you monster!”
A distorted boom sounded off from somewhere else.
Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop
Weightlessness.
The crushing weight squeezing down on my body had dissipated and transformed as if I were drifting in the vacuum of space.
Am I dead?
Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop
Bile rose from my throat, and I coughed my lungs out. I was burning up from within but trembling from the biting cold on the outside.
Air. Sweet, honest to Christ air. It burned my sore throat as I hacked out copious amounts of slime. Between the bouts of coughing and vomiting, I could breathe in just enough to keep me from placing my other foot into the grave.
And then I opened my eyes.
I was shocked to see the familiar stone walls, ceiling, and identical corridors of the servant's quarters as I regained my senses. I was even more shocked to see that the endless set of doors and sconces were blurring past me fast enough to give me whiplash alongside the constant clinking of hooves on stone ringing in my ears.
Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop
I looked downward and discovered that my weightlessness was real, and I was knifing through the air like a speeding bullet. I was able to move my arms and legs, but there was nothing I could do; I was going too fast to grab onto anything to stop myself.
What’s going on?
Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop
The world swirled and sped by me, and vertigo made me sick again, but I had nothing left to vomit. It was enough, however, to stop me from questioning the new cans of worms that opened up just now.
Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop
How did I get into this mess? What is going on right now? Who is moving me right now? Is this just another one of Luna’s tricks?
Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop
Am I still dreaming?
Clink-Clop
I came to an abrupt halt.
I was still dangling belly up towards the ceiling, but I could catch a glimpse of a familiar, deep-seated fear bounding down the empty hallways to my left and right.
One by one, the flames on the sconces were blown out, and the encroaching darkness came into full view alongside the gusts of chilling air that scraped against my bare skin. Fear gripped my chest, and the pains and other horrible sensations from the last torture session came flooding back.
A door in front of me opened. I was at too awkward of an angle to look down or behind me-
The world spun again, and I found myself senseless on carpeted flooring. Before I could pull myself together and off the floor, the door slammed shut behind me-
BANG
And I was under siege again.
My hands dug into the carpet, and I pushed myself onto my knees. Like all the other empty rooms in the servants' quarters, a thin layer of dust caked the furniture and fixtures around the sparse, livable bedroom. I coughed again, but this time from my asthma kicking in from the provocation of my dust allergy as I cupped a hand to my mouth.
My indecision in those few seconds hardly mattered in the grand scheme of things. There were never any windows in these rooms, and trying to be helpful by barricading the door with one of the heavy cabinets would only hurt more than it helped in my withered state.
The pain I felt was all too real, but it was becoming clear that the line between dreams and the waking world had blurred beyond recognition. What did it matter if I just lied down here and waited for death?
I would simply be shunted off into the next nightmare regardless of what actions I took, with only small moments of reprieve like this to reset me back to a normal state before it all happened again.
But beneath all that pain and suffering, there was still that spark. The one that convinced me to break out of my gilded cage and escape the clutches of an evil god. I could still feel it, even now.
Against the wishes of my battered corpse, I allowed that spark to guide me to my feet. A moment later, I breathed in a strained breath and turned to face the door.
The purple armored pegasus holding the door shut wasn’t relying on the flimsy wood of the bedroom door to keep the monster at bay. A translucent golden barrier engulfed the threshold, and for all of the monster’s strength, it couldn’t bend and break through the magical defenses that held firmly in place.
I stood aloof behind them and tried to resolve the brewing headache stabbing its rusty knives right above my eyelids as I pieced together the enigma that was busy saving my skin. The angular, full-plated purple armor matched the ones I saw gathering dust in the armory, complete with crystal sharp batlike wings. The soldier had their back turned to me, but I could distinctly remember the turquoise crescent moon sigil on these models' chest brace, which led to unfortunate implications.
Even so…
They saved my life. And right now? They were not giving the enemy a single inch of ground. I didn’t know why they were doing this, but a picture started to form as I thought more about the current situation.
Was Luna responsible for the disappearances of the castle staff?
It was something that I didn’t honestly think about up to this point. I had assumed that some other terrible fate befell them instead, and I was dealing with a PTSD-ridden horse goddess with separation anxiety, but that didn’t explain the strange turn of events that I was witnessing.
Why would a supposed loyal soldier of Princess Luna disobey her orders? Were there more of these holdouts camped out elsewhere in this castle? Why would the supposed ruler of a nation try to murder her subjects?
What the fuck happened to these ponies before I got here?
I was able to breathe properly again, and my heart rate slowed down enough to not leap out of my chest at the first sign of danger. With my panic response under control, I could think more clearly.
Remember more clearly.
The details of the nightmare eluded me, along with any of the events between then and now, but I could still recall the crucial bits. Turning my thoughts away from past events to my current situation, I put my mind to work.
I remembered enough about the castle layout to know that I was nearly back to square one: my gilded cage was just a few hallways and a staircase away, with the throne room not too far away from here.
Assuming that I would be able to escape this dead end with my life intact, I planned on retracing my steps past the throne room and back into the guard barracks, with my savior hopefully not backstabbing me beforehand. From there, I would try to find my way to the kitchens before trying one of the other exits. One of those doors had to lead to some sort of ballroom or first-floor area I could escape from.
I shook my head.
I shouldn’t be counting my chickens before they hatch; lord knows what other shit is lurking in the shadows of Luna’s Fun House. As for getting out of this-
I thumbed through the pockets of my sodden clothes and brushed my tar-crusted fingers against a familiar glass bottle. It was a welcome surprise that the bottle of phosphorus and the few matches in my pocket survived the attack.
It was even more welcome when the gears in my head started to turn as I ran my tongue along the ridge of my mouth.
Pennies and gasoline. A bitter aftertaste plagued me even in my dreams and drove me up a wall at every waking moment. It made my throat burn, my lungs scream, and my skin itch in all the wrong ways.
If this substance was anything like the real thing…
I tore off my clothes. I was better off using the threadbare scraps that clung to my skin as kindling at this point. Next, I set the phosphorus bottle alongside the pile of soggy fabrics and the three remaining sulfur head matches on the bedspread before clearing my raw throat.
I turned.
The door still held, and my silent protector still had not moved a single inch. Unsurprisingly, the monster still did not relent. It knew it had us cornered and that it was not a matter of if but when it would breach our defenses.
“I know we’re in a tight spot,” The lingering taste of copper I swallowed made me grimace, but the armored pony was too busy standing in front of the door to notice. “But I have an idea to get us both out of here alive. I just need your help.”
No response.
Another series of powerful blows landed on the barrier, but the golden light held firm.
“I don’t think that thing will tire before it drags us away like the meat out of an oyster,” I continued. “But I know we can make that bastard hurt.”
They remained silent.
I couldn’t tell if they were too concentrated on their efforts, unwilling to listen to a civvie for advice due to having a massive chip on their shoulder, or both. Regardless, I did not like being brushed off like this, especially when my life was on the line too.
“Fire,” I bluntly stated while crossing my arms. “Between the phosphorus, matches, and my torn clothes, we have enough fuel to burn down an entire castle wing. Let's smoke this fucker out and be a vapor trail before it can get any funny ideas.”
No snide remarks. No belittling. No pulling rank. They were as expressive as a brick wall and had as much personality as a slice of white bread.
My lips pinched together as I paced in a small circle. Did they not understand the gravity of this situation? Or were they really this dense?
“I refuse to huddle up and die like a cornered rat!” I gritted my teeth. “It’s an abomination! It will never slow, sleep, or stop until we burn it to cinders! What don’t you understand about this?”
I stomped forward-
-Its head twisted around to face me, and my words died on my lips.
Its eyeless gaze stared back.
The purple armored shell housed no living creature; for all I knew, it was running on preprogrammed commands. It was nothing more than a tool, a creation borne out of magic and alchemy and fashioned after an embodiment of necessity.
But whose?
BANG
My eyes darted between the crescent moon sigil on its chest brace and the empty husk's softly glowing vizor slit.
BANG
The threshold flickered briefly before reverting to its bright golden hue, and the automaton continued its silent vigil.
BANG
I was no longer flinching from the constant noise reverberating across the room. It was all just static to me.
BANG
My intense, feverish stare burned into the doorway as my fists started shaking. The soreness from my tense muscles only worsened as the liquid nitrogen numbing my veins turned into greek fire.
I breathed in.
…
“No,” My nostrils flared.
I bounded back towards the bed.
My jerky hand movements and the quivering sensation in my muscles made uncorking the bottle unnecessarily tricky. Dipping one of the sulfur head matches into the mixture without spilling it all over my tarred skin was a painful exercise in patience that I never wanted to experience again.
But I persisted.
I’ve come too far to die from carelessness.
I struck the match against the cork stopper and grinned ferociously.
I snatched a bundle of sodden t-shirt fabric in my other, greased hand. There was a pause, and the automaton tilted its head slightly to the right.
“At the count of three, I am lighting this cloth on fire and chucking it towards the door. It will be up to you whether it's open or not when I do.” I spoke in a deceptively calm tone that even fooled me. My heart pounded in my chest again as a spike of adrenaline stabbed itself into my chest. “It’s time we put an end to this madness, wouldn’t you agree?”
“One.”
The automaton remained frozen in place.
“Two.”
The monster continued to exert its aggression and hate on the forcefield.
“Three.”
Strike. The smell of burning paper washed over the stench of pennies and gasoline.
Throw. My outstretched hand released its burning payload and arched towards the door.
Surprise. I stumbled back as the automaton reared back and shot a row of sharp feathers towards the doorway, sending splinters and chunks of black goo in every direction.
Satisfaction. The monster reeled back from the surprise attack, allowing enough space for the flaming yellow projectile to funnel through the doorway and into the hallway proper. No screech accompanied the flames that engulfed the beast, but its twisted, alien body language spoke volumes.
It could bleed. Therefore, it could die.
It’s time for some payback, motherfucker.
I grabbed another bundle of fabrics in my right hand and sprinted out of the doorway. The clomping of ironshod hooves accompanied me as we pressed the attack. We were surrounded on two fronts; darkness clung to life just out of reach of the flames that licked at the walls and excised monster flesh splattered onto it.
A sudden spark. I jerked my head to the side.
“Clever tin can,” I muttered as the robot pegasus clutched the remanding bundle of fabrics, the bottle of phosphorous, and two sulfur matches in its magic.
Our counterattack continued. For every flame blown out, two more would claim its pound of flesh.
Translucent walls of gold shattered against shifting tendons. Razor sharp wings sliced apart ebony tendrils. Black tar spilled onto the floor and seeped into every crevice in the cracked floors and walls to escape the flames.
It was too little, too late.
Plumes of smoke whisked off clumps of soot in every which direction, and my lungs were burning again.
It didn’t matter.
Nothing did in the heat of that moment. Not my poor throwing technique, my dust allergies, or the instinctive fear of the flames that cleansed the hallway of the evil lurking within the shadows. No, only one thing was on my mind as I taxed my flexing muscles to their limits:
Revenge.
All the pain, fear, and tears cumulated into this singular moment, and I’d be damned if I let it go to waste.
Ignite. Wind up. Throw.
Tar. Fire. Soot.
The darkness reeled back.
I inched forward.
A sudden vision of black flew through the flames, paying no heed to the fire that danced around us. An arrow of gold light speared through the dry air.
It was too late.
Pain erupted in my chest, and my match was wrenched from my hands as I collapsed to the frigid stone floor.
I was down for the count.
But it didn’t stop.
The automaton was still defying all odds.
Keeping track of its movements through all the smoke was a challenge in itself; the damn thing was little more than a deep violet blur—a purple murder blender . One swipe from its sharpened bat-like wings was enough to cut down half a dozen squirming tentacles. Any attempt at retaliation was met with either an empty dust cloud or a well-timed magic barrier, followed by a savage counterattack.
More flames poured down all around me, sowing great streaks of black ash into the already cramped hallway. A dome of gold shielded me from the burning embers and squirming tendrils before the latter were cut down to size.
My adrenaline ebbed away with each cough of blood from my throat as I tried to regain my senses. The unwelcome feeling of hypersensitivity and a rock-hard stomach reared its ugly head once again, but I still held greedily onto the spark of hope inside me. Despite the pain, nothing felt broken.
With the monster's attention focused entirely on my ally, I tore my eyes away from the spectacle. I hurriedly scanned the hall for anything I could use—another bundle of cloth, a match, anything I could use to help even the odds.
My pickings were slim at best.
Any remaining clumps of cloth that we didn't use as ammo were scattered haphazardly around the room, and I was more liable to burn myself than the beast if I tried to use them. With that in mind, I considered trying to wrench a sconce from the wall and lighting it with one of the many fires still burning around me.
That was until I noticed a glint from the corner of my eye.
The abundance of soot clinging to the smoke-filled air overwhelmed my lungs as I crawled toward the glass bottle, praying to Christ himself that I would be beyond the monster’s notice.
An inch. Two. Three.
Droplets of blood seeped from my trembling lips. I grunted, skirting past the puddles of tar and piles of soot as I closed the gap. Hand trembling, I reached out-
Cold.
My left leg numbed.
I screamed.
All it took was a touch. In the chaos and terror, my vision had tunneled to the singular objective in my mind. I should have known that the monster had more tricks up its sleeve- that pieces of it would have feigned death and waited for the proper moment to strike.
And it did.
The tendril’s death grip on my leg mirrored my own with the glass bottle as I was slowly dragged away towards the end of the hall.
The cold began to seep into the pores in my leg’s skin, and not even my newfound sense of bravado could fight against the biological shortcomings of the body or the foul magics that tampered with it. I could only scream myself hoarse.
A trick of the light. I angled my head upwards.
Kroom!
My limb prickled with irritation. A few moments later, sensation rushed back into the frozen nerves as the automaton stood above me, wreathed in a golden aura with legs spaced out.
My lungs screamed a warning before my mind could unfreeze. Dozens of barbed spears crashed against the translucent barrier surrounding us.
SMASH SMASH SMASH
Again and again.
The discordant orgy of relentless violence caused my now deafened ears to ring with thunder.
SMASH SMASH SMASH
A pang of fear gripped my chest as I noticed it straining exhaustedly from the onslaught.
Head down, shaking legs braced. So human-like.
I began to wheeze.
Darkness. The smattering of javelins and spears gave way to oozing mass.
The air around us felt thick, like honey.
Did any of this even matter?
My eyes burned as I white-knuckled the bottle in my hands.
Was this some divine, Sisyphean punishment for a crime I couldn’t remember doing? How many times did I end up in a scenario just like this? How many times would I be pursued and cornered within these halls? How many times did I suffer a fate such as this? Stripped bare of everything that made me who I was?
…
It would be so easy—just a single gulp. That’s all it would take.
…
But it isn’t that easy, is it? There is no coward's way out. Not while I’m trapped as Luna’s precious little plaything.
…
Not fast enough. Not clever enough. Not strong enough. I can’t ever do anything right, no matter how hard I try. I always end up short.
I uncorked the bottle. An image flashed in the back of my mind. It was gone within a microsecond, but the pungent odor that wafted to my nostrils was more than enough to jog my fading memory.
“I hate garlic,” I said, tipping the bottle towards my lips.
An iron-shod hoof pressed down upon my chest, which broke me out of my spell. I stared incredulously into the purple faceplate of my protector.
Many things were slipping my mind, but if there was one banal fact that remained glued to my prefrontal cortex, it was about how we humanized everything. Animals, robots, appliances… nothing was safe from our favorite past time of projecting thoughts and feelings onto things explicitly not human.
I wanted to believe this wasn’t just some protocol or another one of Luna’s tricks.
I wanted to believe that someone cared.
Warmth enveloped my hand, and my grip slackened.
The bottle floated gently away from me, and I could only stare as the automaton loosened its faceplate, allowing me to see the ‘magic behind the curtain.’ Runes, pictograms, and patterns were carefully etched and spaced inside the interior framework, and they were utterly unrecognizable to me.
All except one.
The embroidered image of the glowing sun was the focal point of the arcane craftsmanship. Despite feeling like it was a lifetime ago, I winced in almost physical discomfort as the memory of the throne room flashed before my eyes.
“Why are you showing me this?” I asked.
Before I could act upon the apprehension worming its way out of my hardened stomach, the automaton performed its best impression of a relapsing alcoholic as it ‘guzzled’ the liquid phosphorus.
Everything after that was a blur.
The barrier fell.
I cast around wildly.
A blanket of golden, soothing warmth enveloped me.
The darkness surged.
The first spear pierced the wing, pinning the twitching limb to the automaton’s barrel. The next four slammed into the backplate. Another punctured directly through the crest and jutted out through the neck in a macabre display.
I blinked.
Like flies buzzing over a festering corpse, the shadows swarmed over them.
I retched; the scent of gasoline was fighting for control from the garlic that scratched at the skin in my nose and throat.
Burning.
My insides were burning.
Sweat rolled down from my forehead and into my stinging eyes.
And then I saw fire.
A dreamless sleep.
A skull-crushing headache.
A muffled groan.
My eyes fluttered open.
Ashen grey, with sprinkles of black. I held a hand to my forehead and slumped forward as I greedily drank down the droplets of saliva that started to form in my dried mouth. I sat there for a few minutes, catching my breath between the bouts of wheezing while allowing the tension to roll off my weak muscles.
This…
I didn’t have words for the conflicting emotions competing for the podium finish.
And it wasn’t for lack of trying. Time had little meaning within these stone walls, and even then, I still tried to keep that spark of hope within me alive. I didn’t want to think of this as just another pyrrhic victory.
So I didn’t.
I accepted that things were still out of my control, but I didn’t let that fear control me. Instead, I closed my eyes, locked my hands together, crossed my legs, and kept my breathing slow and even. My heartbeat slowed to a relaxed pace, and I felt my hardened stomach loosen up. It wasn’t enough to offset the pains in my joints and the back of my spine or the mother of all migraines that was busy skullfucking me through my eye socket, but I was safe.
“Everything will be ok,” I whispered.
And for once, I believed myself.
I stood up.
The unnatural evil that had darkened these halls was gone, replaced by the natural blue and silver hues that had illuminated them initially. Granted, there were still shadows clinging to life in whatever nook and cranny they could hide away in, but they were few and far between.
Such a sight had seemed almost unthinkable just a short while ago, let alone possible. But it was.
And it was beautiful.
I drank it all in for a moment and basked in the ashes that danced in the moonlight. I knew Luna was undoubtedly seething at my brazen challenge to her authority, but I didn’t care.
Instead, I brushed my feet through the piles of soot in front of me, and the dust flowed between my toes like grains of sand. A few moments later, I saw a glint of violet shine from underneath the ash.
“...Thank you,” I bowed my head.
Silence.
…
In my mind’s eye, I rubbed my fingers alongside a pristine half dollar.
I placed my thumb under the fifty-cent piece and flicked.
Kennedy’s frown stared back.
I turned left.
Empty hallways. Empty Rooms.
No traces of life anywhere.
I looked around, trying to note anything that could be useful or used as a landmark as I carefully retread familiar ground. Apart from the makeshift toga I fashioned for myself from bedsheets, there didn’t seem to be anything immediately dangerous nearby; no sudden movements out of the corner of my eye or irate alicorns hot on my heels.
My chest still felt sore from the monster’s attack, but nothing felt cracked or broken, and my other issues notwithstanding, I was still conscious.
No, I was as able-bodied as possible, given the scenario, and I was thankful for that.
Aside from my cuts and bruises, of course.
With that in mind, I kept a modicum of discretion as I sleuthed down more empty corridors, obnoxiously thin hallways, and a flight of stairs with only the pale ambient light of the castle to guide me.
Keeping to the shadows, I pressed close to the wall on my right as I rounded another corner-
The sudden stillness in the air tugged at my attention as I scrambled back.
Carnage.
That was the first word that came to mind as I poked my head out from the edge of the niche I was crouching behind.
Severed armored limbs, perforated metal sheets, pulverized helmets… all were strewn about in front of a familiar pair of massive, solid doors of gold.
No. This has to be- This can’t be right. This isn’t right. This isn’t right!
My mind buzzed.
It was happening again. Just when I thought I was near the finish line, Luna would change the goalposts. It didn’t matter how many times I survived the constant monster attacks or escaped her clutches; there was always something else to chase after me. Another obstacle to sap at my dwindled reserves of stamina and sanity.
It was the same damn scene over and over again. A fucking circle.
Just one of these was enough to fight the monster to a standstill! With this many, they should have carved it like a thanksgiving turkey! What happened?
With trepidation, I lightly tiptoed toward the crime scene.
Unlike before, there wasn’t any sign of inflicted enemy casualties. No greasy tar stains stained every possible surface. No malodorous gasoline smell scratched at the insides of my nose and throat.
I bent down and heaved as I picked up a rent violet breastplate. Even in its current condition, its weight was deceptively heavy for its size. Upon closer inspection, I nearly balked at how thick the armor was: at least three times as much as medieval-plate armor. With how dense it felt, I could easily assume that this wasn’t forged from subpar steel.
Between that and whatever spells the etched runes carved into the inside of it provided, the required force needed to cut down not only just one of these robots but scores-
“-tire of your games, sister!”
Crunch
The bits and pieces of armor on the floor sprang up into the air, and I almost doubled over on the floor.
…
What the fuck was that?
I cast my weary eyes onto the throne doors.
“Thou shall not take him away from us! This we swear!”
The castle foundations began to shake.
Author's Note
I am genuinely sorry for this delay. Between the multiple rewrites that I felt were needed and some problems I've had to deal with in real life, I was slow to get this chapter out. I was also considering combining this and what I have planned for chapter six into one big chapter, but I think you guys have waited long enough for more content.
I hope you enjoyed this!
More often than not, the immediate aftermath of a disaster is just as chaotic as the disaster itself.
It didn’t matter if it was the result of active malice or an act of god; there would always be people who tried to rush into the thick of things, no matter how grim it may seem. Generally, it ends up being a pointless effort. Either the stress eats away at their bodies until they become as useless as the victims they're trying to save, or pure, unlucky chance cuts their act of heroism short.
If they’re lucky, the real first responders corral them out of harm’s way as they try to meaningfully help. Whether they be a trained medic performing an emergency triage or search and rescue sifting through the rubble for trapped and helpless victims, they try to save as many people as possible.
Even so, There’s only so much someone can do, no matter how many hours they’ve trained for a situation, and I envied those who could face these catastrophes without flinching away from the mounting horrors that awaited them.
No, I was very firmly in a different category—the spectators. We were the cowards, the greedy, the pessimists. More often than not, our kind can justify our inaction with logic or craft an elaborate scapegoat to avoid the blame being hoisted upon our shoulders. Regardless if we’re just out for ourselves or spineless cowards, there is one unifying trait that brings our lot together.
We’re vultures.
We have an obsessive need to witness the unfortunate suffering of others, even if we fervently deny it. Like people at a zoo, we slow down to see the mangled bodies inside their crumpled vehicles in an accident. We watch impassionately from the comfort of our sofas as countless lives are uprooted and taken by the latest catastrophe. Some of us even scour the internet for live footage of these tragedies to satiate that fear-driven, adrenaline-fueled rush we crave so desperately.
This inherent need kept me rooted in front of the throne room doors, even as the very castle itself trembled. Curtains, banisters, sconces, tapestries- the collage of bright yellows and midnight blues scattered anything not nailed down like leaves in autumn. At the same time, dozens of fractures yawned open on the polished marble floors, greedily swallowing any wayward debris.
I reflexively placed my hands to my ears as the wind’s howls grew in ferocity. The patchwork of my frayed memories and past experiences thudded away inside my skull as I witnessed the freak whirlwind tearing apart everything in its wake. Through all the noise, I could still hear her voice . It was everywhere at once. Behind me, in front of me, inside my head. Luna’s voice was like a shadow on my thoughts.
Heedless of my survival instincts, I kept my eyes glued to the spectacle through the open throne room doors as these two forces of nature clashed. Propelled by wings and magic, Luna launched herself forwards, legs outstretched as she tried to pounce at her prey like a tiger to its meat.
Body ablaze, the violet armored figure retorted with a powerful blast of energy. The sluggish air compressed into a gout of fire that filled the throne room with a flash as bright as the sun.
Billowing shrouds of dust swept toward me, and I shielded my eyes and mouth as I began to tear up. The sounds that accompanied the blast were painful, almost deafening.
I fell to my knees.
…
I blinked.
White. Piles of white poured in through the shattered stained glass windows. Freezing, biting cold gnawed at the muscles underneath my skin. Pale clouds of vapor escaped my lips. The wind’s howls grew even more feral. A fear, long lodged and buried in the depths of my consciousness, surged into the forefront of my mind.
“Doth thou truly have nothing to say, sister? After everything thou hath wrought upon us ?” She accused, her voice drowned in scorn and twinged with sadness. Luna firmly placed her forehoof upon her opponent's chest plate, whom she had immobilized with a tangle of dark blue, ethereal vines within the confusion of those few critical moments.
“What more can I say that has not already been said? What must I do to free you from your delusions?” Another voice responded. Regal. Scornful. Just like Luna’s, when she wasn’t hiding her true nature behind a mask of empathy and understanding. Even within her precarious position, the voice of Luna’s adversary commanded respect.
“Do not lay th y blame at our hooves, sister! ‘Twas th y folly that- ”
“Starved and buried our subjects under a mountain of snow? Brought ruin to countless kingdoms? Violated the sanctity of an innocent being's body and soul? No, I’m afraid I won’t be taking credit for all of your… hard work .”
“ Th y stubbornness and lies are tiresome, sister. We have only wanted to help thee, yet thou insists upon spurning our offers for help like a stubborn mule,” The sound of metal bending and snapping echoed through the throne room as Luna pressed down with her hoof.
“Know this, Tia, that we do this for thine own good. Time heals all wounds, and thou will see the folly of thine actions once we make thee whole again.” She mournfully spoke as her hoof punctured clean through the armor’s chest plate.
Something suddenly scraped against the back of my left leg, just below the knees, and I nearly jumped out of my skin.
Metallic. Purple. The lone forelimb dangled off the perforated chest plate, and I stared into the eyeless gaze of the broken automaton. I didn’t need to read between the lines to understand what they were trying to convey.
Run, you incompetent dipshit! Get the fuck out!
Quietly, I pushed myself up to my feet before turning to my left-
“Daniel!”
No. No, no, no, no-
The air shifted.
My vision turned blue.
A sizzling sound rang in my eardrums like strips of bacon on a frying pan as my makeshift toga was torn away from me and discarded amongst the piles of scrap metal. And I'm confident I would've heard the pounding of my heart had the blood in my veins not been frozen by the sudden cold.
The world spun, and my stomach churned as Luna’s witchcraft swept me off my feet.
Through the opening in the doorway, pale turquoise stared back at me.
Terror gripped my chest.
“Let go of me! Let me go! LET ME GO!” I shrieked. My hands scraped themselves raw against the twin golden doors as I tried to latch onto something, anything. A part of the mural work or the handles, but her grip on me was too strong. With little fanfare, I was dragged, kicking and screaming into the throne room like a child having tantrums at a local park.
“Be still, little one,” Luna cooed.
“No! Stay away from me, you fucking abomination!” My arms and legs flailed about as I tried to delay the inevitable. All the while, a slight grin formed on Luna’s muzzle as she sat down on her haunches. Her mane and tail billowed from an unseen wind, and her blue-furred coat looked just as pristine as I remembered it, as if she wasn’t just duking things out with an entire army of magic droids and her ‘sister.’
Wings and forehooves wrapped around my naked, shivering skin like a weighted blanket. My muscles strained and tensed up as I tried to struggle and force her away, but I knew it was a pointless gesture.
“Daniel!” Luna whispered into my ears.
It was the voice she had used before—that goddamn lying, motherly tone. The same one that she used to pull the wool over my eyes for weeks and months in that cramped gilded cage. I knew that this was all an act, but no matter how much I insisted on this fact to myself, I still felt my resistance waning.
The sound of her voice was a siren’s call, and the thumping of her heart was a lullaby.
My futile attempt to wriggle free from her grasp weakened, much to the pleasure of my aching muscles.
“We… we were so worried!” Her icy breath made my neck's hair tingle, and I subconsciously surrendered myself more into her grip. I tried to justify my shameful behavior to my lack of clothing, but the lie didn’t stick. After countless hours of being hounded at every turn, I was all out of juice. It was a miracle that I was even conscious.
“...Why?” I exhaustedly wheezed. It was the million-dollar question. The one I had desperately searched for an answer to ever since I arrived in this world.
“You are safe now, my child. She cannot deceive you anymore.” She responded softly with her patented non-answers. “This, I swear.”
“The only person I need protection from is you.”
“We- I do not know what lies our sister polluted your mind with, but rest assured, I will make things right.”
“You can’t make things right,” I murmured. If I had had this conversation at any other point, my anger would have boiled over tenfold. But now? Between the fear paralyzing me into submission and my newfound sense of apathy? I couldn’t find it in myself to raise my voice. “And even if you could, you wouldn’t. ”
“It’s always just more lies with you. Lies and promises you never deliver on.”
“That is- “
“Unfair?”
“Nay,” Luna flinched. Her ears twitched and folded to the sides of her head as she nuzzled my head. “You are correct. I have withheld the truth from you, but only for your safety. Had I revealed my inability to send you home, you would have surely slain yourself in grief.”
“And there you go again—more half-truths and small admissions of guilt as a smoke screen to hide your other lies.”
“And what would you have had me do, Daniel? Stain thy soul with grief before imparting terrible truths about the dangers lurking outside the castle walls? Of my sister’s madness? You were safe under my care, child, a luxury that we are sad to say is in very short supply….”
Luna’s death grip on me slackened briefly as she stared into the distance. “There is nothing I can do to compensate for the suffering and pointless cruelty you have endured at the hooves of my sister. I have failed you, Daniel. Completely and utterly.”
Something faintly scratched against the marble floor behind me.
Our eyes met.
The pained expression on her face would have moved most people to tears or close enough to them. Even with me knowing better, I almost still fell for it. She was a professional, a musician, and an actor. She knew the exact cadence her voice needed to sell her lies and the perfect body language to discomfort her victims so they’d dance to her tune.
But this had the opposite effect on me. It started as another pained wheeze, then a stinging sensation in my eyes as a flurry of conflicting emotions pushed down against my chest. A bout of unintelligible laughter squeezed out of my chest like the water from a wet sponge. Every last ounce of fear, shred of hope, and a twinge of pain and exhaustion flowed into this single bout of mania.
“Daniel!” Luna grimaced, and I was again crushed in another herculean embrace; the plumage of her wings stroked and caressed my back gently in small, circular rotations. “What is wrong, my child? What has she done to you?”
“Enough with the bullshit, princess ,” I scathingly retorted. “I’m not falling for your motherly act or your fucking crocodile tears anymore. Everything you’ve ever told me was just one lie after another. You were never going to send me home, were you?”
“Daniel, I promised- “
“Your promises aren’t worth a damn!” I seethed, quaking in her embrace with rage. “I did everything you asked and wasted away in that cramped room for months! All because I trusted you to honor your word, even when my instincts screamed at me to run away as fast as my feet could carry me!”
“And had you stayed put, I would have been able to grant your wish!” Luna cupped my cheek with her hoof and stared directly into my eyes.
“And yet the moment I dared to step a single foot outside my prison, you hunted me down like a rabid animal! You and your damn monsters! Not your sister!” I shouted. “And I know this isn’t the first time we’ve had this conversation, either! How many times has your pet violated my mind and stolen my memories? How many times have you lied to my face?”
“I have done no such thing! I would never conceive of doing something so wretched and vile!” Luna trembled as if trying to shake off a terrible memory. “You are more precious to me than anything! I would trade my throne, crown, and my very moon and stars before I would see you come to harm!”
“Then why did I hear your voice?”
“Daniel?”
“It wasn’t enough for you to steal me away from my family. No, you wanted to be thorough,” My breathing hitched for a moment. “I don’t remember how it found me or what happened before I was being… digested by that monster. But you know what I did remember, princess?”
I leaned my head forward.
“Your voice. You whispered sweet nothings into my ear as I was drowning to death. You wanted to scrub away any semblance of myself away from me. You wanted my past to be nothing more than a nightmare. And when I cried for help, do you know who listened?”
Luna only stared at me, not betraying any outward emotion that would ruin her self-imposed image.
“It wasn’t you.”
“She is deceiving you!” Luna protested. “Anything that does not worship the ground that she walks on is an affront to her! And you would never willingly bend the knee to a po- person such as her!”
Luna continued her act; her ears, still splayed to the sides of her head, twitched while her eyes closed. I recoiled in disgust as she placed a small, wet kiss on my forehead before nuzzling me again.
Luna shook her head slowly before continuing. “You remind her of herself. Too proud. Too stubborn. She will stop at nothing until she breaks you, and then she will discard you like a broken toy.”
“And you won’t?” I asked warily. “When you grow bored chasing me around your castle, you won’t just toss my broken body into the nearest ditch to rot? Or do you plan on making me suffer for eternity alongside you?”
“You know not what she has done, child,” Luna whispered. “Of what she used to be. Every night, I mourn for the sister that I have lost, and every day I battle against the monster she has become.”
Luna paused.
Seconds felt like eternities in her iron grip, and I spent that stretch of seemingly endless time trying to wiggle my way out of her grasp. It was ultimately a futile effort, even with the princess experiencing another PTSD-ridden flashback, complete with quivering lips and a thousand-yard stare.
“W- I have made many mistakes, Daniel. I have failed friends, subjects, and my sister countless times in my eternal life. Kingdoms have fallen to ruin, and entire cultures have been erased because my sister forced my hoof.”
A thin line of tears matted the fur on her cheeks.
“For so long, we allowed the weight of our sins to chain us down and hide us away from the world. Our malaise has allowed Celestia’s restless spirit to run amok for far too long and corrupt everything her light touches. Our fear has driven you away from us and, in turn, allowed my sister to poison your mind.”
Her turquoise eyes glittered dangerously.
Something metallic scraped against marble.
“No more,” Luna said firmly. “We do not blame thee for thy folly, but we cannot allow it to persist. We will do whatever is necessary to protect you, even from yourself!”
I withered and squirmed under her draconic gaze as her horn glowed an ominous blue. Sweat oozed out of every pore of my forehead, and my skin turned ashen as my body shook uncontrollably. My feeble attempts to escape only enraged her further as her vice-like grip tightened, causing my bones to creak and driving the air out of my lungs.
I was in the predator's jaws, waiting for them to snap shut.
“We will have thee back, child. We will make thee forget our sister’s lies and only remember our undying love for thee.”
Something cold rubbed at the skin of my feet.
Luna bent her head down and touched her horn on top of my sweaty forehead.
“We shall see,” Celestia replied.
Everything went dark.
Author's Note
Nearing the finish line, I can't promise how long the final chapter will take, but it's going to either be a long one, or I might split it into two or three, depending on what you guys prefer.
Consciousness came to me in short bursts: a flash of light here, a directionless hum there. My eyes fluttered, catching glimpses of something just a few feet away from me. Running my hands along the floor, I felt the distinct coarse texture of hardwood brush against my palms as I tried to recall previous events.
At first, everything was a tumultuous storm of confusion. I had no recollection of how I got here. No attempts at jogging my memory worked, and it seemed as if something was repressing the events that had happened previously.
This confusion only reinforced itself when my tired eyes adjusted to the light.
The dilapidated, rotting bed frame was the first clue that something was blatantly amiss. If the foul odor and the black stains were any indications, something must have crawled onto it and died ages ago, forgotten and left to rot.
The small nightstand to the side fared slightly better; it was still standing. However, like the hardwood floor I had apparently dozed off upon, the discolored brown wood was warped, scratched, and dented from water stains. From the looks of it, a stiff breeze would be enough to knock the damn thing over and scatter the moldering splinters into the wind.
And lastly was the room itself. Apart from the solitary door at the far end, it was utterly barren. There were no closets, drawers, or other pieces of furniture to be seen. It felt so utterly alien, and some part of me believed that something was seriously wrong with what I was witnessing.
I rubbed my stinging eyes as I tried to ignore the musty mushroom-like odor aggravating my sinuses. It was all too much, and I tried my hardest to understand why I felt this way, let alone the plethora of other questions I had.
I can’t remember coming here and have no reason to go spelunking inside abandoned houses, right? Not unless I have a history with this place specifically.
Silence reigned.
Yes. There has to be a reason for all of this.
The boards creaked under my feet as I stepped towards the nightstand, glancing at the solitary, toppled-over photo frame splayed out on top of it. Like everything else, father time had ravaged the gold-colored metal with spots of rust and grime, and I was hesitant to touch the damn thing.
But curiosity won out in the end.
I grimaced, my right hand grasping at the edge of the frame as I slowly tilted it up.
…
Four people smiled back, and then I remembered.
The gilded cage. The endless hallways. The nightmares.
Luna. She did this! S- she dragged me into the throne room and then-
I reflexively brought a hand up to my forehead as a lance of pain stabbed itself just above my right eyelid. There was so much missing.
So much out of place.
I knew that I used to remember these people and that this was all some fucked up dream, but that knowledge was not enough to calm my nerves. Luna had done this. She stole my memories of them and still wasn’t satisfied.
What use was I to her as an empty husk? A thoughtless automaton? None of it made sense, especially not for a delusional and socially starved creature like her.
With my newfound perspective, I glanced around the room again.
Water damage. Stains. Cracks in the walls. Scratches and bumps on the waterlogged hardwood floors. All of this would have made any house or abode in real life a safety hazard from the festering molds and other contaminants alone. But this wasn’t an actual room in a real home; it wasn’t the result of neglect or some natural disaster.
This was my mind.
And I didn’t know how I was supposed to repair this or if it could even be fixed. Humanity certainly never figured-
VVVRRRRIIIIINNNNNGGGGGG!
I looked downwards.
It made sense that I missed it at first glance, only a tiny corner of my black iPhone was jutting out from underneath the nightstand, and what was visible was cast in a thick shadow. Without a second thought, I bent down and scooped it up in my hands before answering immediately.
“Hello?” I said.
White noise and static hissed in my right ear.
“...Sarah?“ The name tumbled out of my mouth, but I couldn’t connect it to a face or a memory.
“Barricade yourself immediately,” the voice on the other end replied suddenly, and my eyes widened in surprise at its familiar regal timbre. “And no matter what you hear outside, do not be swayed by its lies. Do you understand?”
“Wait!” I cried out.
“I know you must have many questions, but I am afraid I cannot answer them right now,” Celestia continued. “I must attend to an urgent matter-”
“I know this is a dream, Princess,” I said. My eyes remained firmly on the door as I spoke. “And we both know that whatever you’re planning won’t work! Luna mopped the floor with you once already, and she didn’t have the home-field advantage then!”
“What would you have me do then, Daniel?” the Princess snapped, causing me to twitch in surprise. “Do you truly think I have any other choice in the matter? Or should I stand aside and let my sister corrupt you?”
“No.” I shook my head. “But we should try to think of a better plan before we try and fight the mistress of dreams in the dream realm!”
“We are out of time,” she replied with a softer tone. “I know I am nearly powerless compared to my sister in her domain, but there is too much at stake to allow her to remain unopposed! You have suffered enough because of my failures.” Static crackled in my ears again as the Princess paused. “Please, Daniel. Let me make things right.”
I tapped my bare foot on the hardwood floor in agitation as I tried to find the right words to speak. “...There has to be some way I could help. If this is a dream, then I could-”
“Your efforts would prove futile, even if you had all of your memories intact,” she said. “As you are right now? You would be a liability at best.”
“Please,” my other arguments died at the tip of my tongue. There was no way I would convince her otherwise. “At least tell me what’s at stake. I deserve that much.”
I kept my phone pressed to the side of my face with bated breath as I filtered out the white noise.
“What is a Queen without her subjects? A mother without her children?” Celestia said. “Luna has been denied both for centuries, and the wounds in her psyche run far deeper than you can possibly imagine.”
“She’s using me as a crutch to fulfill her fantasies?”
“No, it's far worse than that. Luna truly covets you above all else, but you are ultimately just a means to an end,” she replied. “Do you remember anything about your arrival here, Daniel?
My eyes flitted as a few flashes of light and sound rushed through my mind. “Luna. She- I was sprawled on the ground in front of her after she pulled me through a portal.”
The small snippet of memory, the only one from Earth that supposedly survived the journey, was gone. I clearly remembered scrawling my thoughts and fears about my encounter with Luna, with her explanation about her portal experiments and how I was wrenched away from the comfort of my bed, but the more I thought about it, the less sense it made.
“She told me I needed to be kept a secret for my safety and apparently led me through the castle in secret to avoid her subjects.” I placed a hand on my forehead as I tried to make sense of all the noise buzzing in my skull. “And yes, I know now that was a complete lie, but… Princess, I can’t remember this encounter ever happening. I wrote about it, and I bet it's still sitting on that desk in my suite-”
“And yet you can’t remember it ever happening?”
“Not just that.” I began to pace around the room. “I don’t think it ever did happen.”
More flashes of light; more muddled answers revealed themselves to me in my mind’s eye as my feet plodded against the damp hardwood. My thoughts led me to the memory of another room.
Blue walls, polished marble floor, a pattern of stars and constellations painted on the ceiling, and a row of bookcases—I remembered tearing through them like a man possessed, trying to find some means of escape.
“They were just like the one I wrote in my suite,” I whispered.
“Daniel?”
“The notes. My writings. Luna kept them hidden away in her room, and I stumbled upon an entire collection of them!” My heart started thundering in my chest, and even though I knew it was a dream, I couldn’t get it to stop. “But I don’t remember writing any of it!”
“Daniel!”
I halted in place.
“Breathe. Deep breaths.”
I followed her advice. Centering myself, I focused on keeping my breathing slow and even until my heart rate slowed.
“Okay,” I whispered with the breath I was slowly exhaling. “Princess, thank you.”
“Call me Celestia,” she said reluctantly. “I am nearly as unfit for that title as my sister.”
“That isn’t fair to you.”
“Isn’t it?” Celestia questioned. “I allowed all of this to happen. I abandoned my sister when she needed me most, allowing her jealousy and hatred to fester. And when the time came, I could not do what was necessary to defend my subjects from her.”
I heard Celestia clear her throat.
“That day will forever be burned into my memory. One moment, my little sister stood before me. Then, just like a nightmare, another creature stood in her place. It wore her face and used her voice, but deep down, I knew she was gone.”
“I’m sorry," I said. I didn’t know what else to say, even with the knowledge that I had also suffered from Luna’s actions. With how powerful and seemingly immortal these demi-goddesses were, everything I suffered through must have been a single raindrop in the ocean compared to the shit she’s seen.
“The Luna I knew a thousand years ago, my bright, cheerful, young sister, is already dead. She’s been dead ever since she gave in to her madness, and it’s taken me this long to come to terms with it. I let her hurt you because I couldn’t let go!”
Another pause. I remained silent, allowing Celestia to recollect herself.
“I have strung you along for far too long already,” Celestia finally spoke. “Luna knows you are not of this world, and she has combed through your memories hundreds of times to learn everything she can about you. Your language, your customs, she has itemized and collected every last shred of data she can get her filthy hooves on.”
“It is not without saying that she truly does care for you in her own twisted way, but having you requite the love she has given you is secondary to her true goal—to find and rule over new subjects, willing or not.”
I was at a loss for words, but how could I not be? Luna had intentionally blinded me to anything other than her truth, her words. I had nothing else to go off of for all this time.
“She cannot be reasoned with or appeased, and her greed is unmatched even by the mightiest of dragons,” Celestia declared icily. “I must stop her here and now, or else her evil will befall your people just as it did mine.”
“What are you saying?” I said, my eyes wide with shock. “T-there’s no way she could find Earth! It would be like finding a needle in a field of haystacks!”
“Do you truly believe that, knowing how much power she wields? Did you not ever question where Luna disappeared off to while she let you rot in that suite?” Celestia went on. “She has scoured the ruins of our kingdom ever since she brought you into the castle, looking for the anomaly that sent you here. And I fear that she is close to finding it.”
I tried to reply, but I couldn’t find my voice as some of the pieces clicked inside my head. Luna had been ruling over a dead kingdom for god only knows how long, so there was no reason for her not to give me her undivided attention. For her to disappear for extended periods, only to appear at random intervals to feed and check up upon me…
I was already at the door, pulling and twisting at the knob as my heartbeat accelerated threefold.
“Daniel, you will be much safer fortified inside your mind than in the dream realm!” she reprimanded, somehow knowing what I was trying to achieve before I even put my mind to it.
“Bullshit!” I cried out, remembering how the cheap wooden door had flown off its hinges. The extensive ‘water’ damage I could spot on nearly every surface of the room only further justified my point in my eyes. “Hiding with my back against the wall didn’t work the last time! And it definitely won't work now!”
“You are in no condition to fight, and I will not let you use yourself as bait! Not again!”
“You’re one to talk!” I snapped back.
With another twist, I wrenched the door open.
Blackness, swirling into stars.
My body lurched forward, and my stomach twisted into knots. My phone slipped from my hands and plummeted downward into a mirror-still ocean far below, reflecting the nighttime heavens back up above.
“Shit!” I reached out with my right hand while leaning back and holding onto the door handle for dear life with my left. It was just an endless ocean of stars, with utterly alien constellations slowly wheeling overhead, and I could feel a sense of disjointedness as I struggled to maintain my balance.
My eyes darted around, with thoughts panicked and frayed. Were it not for the solid ground beneath my feet, I would not have been able to tell which way was up and which was down.
And that terrified me.
Like everything else, I knew this was fake, but that didn’t stop the fear that crept up my spine as I balanced precariously at the edge of the doorway. I had no recollection of anything like this before, but something was eating away at me. An instinctual hatred and fear of the waters below and all the things lurking underneath its surface.
Stop. Move back. Move. MOVE.
I heaved. The muscles in my left arm strained, and I struggled against some unseen force as I shifted my weight and pulled.
The door closed shut.
I fell backward.
Something clattered onto the floor beside me.
The bare white ceiling was spinning above me while I lay senseless on the floor, reeling from the unpleasant churning of my stomach and my sudden bout of vertigo. It wasn’t until my hand brushed against cold, polished glass instead of damp hardwood that I regained my sense of awareness again.
Black case. Cracked, black screen. Same as it was before, as if the damn thing didn’t fall eight hundred meters into the drink. I didn’t question it, instead hastily bringing the phone to my ear.
“Celestia?” Much to my dismay, there wasn’t any sound—not even a single burst of static. “Damn!”
Glancing downward, I idly tapped at the cracked screen of my phone, taking in the rainswept sidewalks and streets, the lines of taxis and cars, and the wall of fog that enveloped everything ahead for a moment before trying to enter my passcode.
Second verse, same as the first—nothing I tried worked, just like last time. My lips pinched together as I beat my head over the metaphorical wall, knowing that I had inadvertently egged Celestia on further due to my abrupt hangup.
“Please, just work! C’mon! C’mon!” I let out an impatient snort as I tried yet another string of numbers, falling further and further into despair with each incorrect password. “None of this is even real! I shouldn’t be having this much trouble!”
Another string of numbers. Another failure. I could feel my blood pressure rising with each tap of my fingers on the glass, and I was all but ready to throw the damn thing across the room before a pinprick of pain poked at my thumb.
The cracks in the glass shifted, knitting themselves together like needlework. My posture stiffened when the last fracture disappeared, and the text ‘swipe up to open’ prominently displayed itself at the bottom of the screen.
Apprehension began fluttering away in my stomach as my thumb scraped upwards against the polished glass.
Some part of me had expected this, but even that couldn’t stop the long, low sigh that escaped my lips. Sparse was underselling just how barren the ‘home screen’ was, with only a single app nestled in the far left corner. But perhaps the biggest gut punch itself was the background image.
A familiar, solitary wooden desk illuminated by dim candlelight.
I gazed upon it, my hatred and fear of Luna running in a recursive loop inside my head. The strong take, and the weak suffer. That was the only lesson Luna imparted upon me that stuck. And I knew if I didn’t fight her until my dying breath, I would be trapped in that room again.
I shivered, hugging my legs to myself.
My thumb hovered over the photos app and pressed down.
To my dismay, I could find no evidence of my previous life outside the confines of Luna’s castle, save for the lock screen photo. Family and Friends, Places, Favorites, all these albums were utterly empty.
The recent album was my only lead, with thirty-seven photos to scroll through.
Tap.
That fucking desk was the first sight I was greeted to, alongside many other similar images of my prison suite. The only difference between them was the slightly different angles and overly exaggerated shadows, but they all captured that claustrophobic sensation perfectly.
It took thirteen swipes before this trend changed.
A wooden door, with my hand clasped around its golden handle. It would have been an unremarkable image to anyone else, but to me? It was so much more. My desire for freedom, my fear of the unknown, and my unbound sense of curiosity, all packaged into a single picture. It was the point of no return, but I had a greater understanding of what lay ahead this time.
I swiped left.
Endless hallways bathed in candlelight. Sterile, empty furnished rooms. The isolation I had experienced was something otherworldly, and even with the knowledge of what happened next, I could still feel a sense of wonder in these liminal spaces.
Swipe. Recollect. Swipe again.
The tone of the slideshow quickly changed. Gone were the still images, replaced by blurred and unfocused photos, as if the cameraman was accidentally snapping one pic after the other while running for his dear life.
Without the small glimpses of landmarks sparsely laid out between the stretches of blurry images, it all would have been impossible to decipher. But I was able to recollect my journey, from the first time I laid my eyes upon the massive, twin set of golden doors to the last.
The emotional rollercoaster continued as I swiped at the screen with my thumb. Anxiety, stress, anger, hope—all these conflicting emotions fought for dominance as I neared the end of this macabre slideshow. The soreness in my aching muscles, the fear that gripped my chest, my lungs and brain starving for oxygen, I remembered these feelings clear as day as I moved from set piece to set piece.
A kitchen. A broom closet. Luna’s room. My breathing hitched when I spotted a glimpse of Luna’s legs in a photo, and the harrowing memory of hiding under her bed came back to me in full force. It was enough to make my stomach churn.
The image quality took a sharp nose dive after that, with shadows dancing in every nook and cranny, and everything else visible was warped in some way. Perhaps it was a sign that my memory was faulty and suspect or that I purposely purged the events that had happened afterward from my mind, but I still knew enough to fill in the blanks.
The stench of pennies and gasoline burning my throat as I drowned to death was something that would continue to haunt me from this life to the next. Even so, there was something about seeing these from an outside perspective, from a detached point of view, that made me thank whatever higher power was watching over me.
The tension that had long since welled inside me was ebbing away in tiny trickles.
I swiped again. The war for my emotional state continued in my head, with each side savagely fighting a protracted battle of attrition with no clear-cut winner. This continued as I continued to study and swipe through each image, with the photo quality becoming increasingly distorted until they were utterly incomprehensible.
All, save for the last image.
Everything, from the broken stained glass windows to the fallen debris and piles of snow, was captured with perfect fidelity.
Everything, including the menacing form of the Lunar Princess.
Her air of kindness and understanding was absent in this photo, replaced by an insatiable hunger in her turquoise eyes. This was also reflected in her maniacal grin, which bore no resemblance to the calming smile she always wore in my presence. But what set me off the most?
It was her poise. With the gait in her bent legs and her eyes locked directly into mine, she looked as if she was ready to pounce at me through the screen. And with being trapped in the confines of her domain, I knew such a thing was possible.
That knowledge haunted me as I sat still, gazing at the phone screen.
My hatred and fear of Luna ran in a recursive loop inside my head.
…
“No.”
Her eyes remained unblinking.
My chest tightened.
“I won’t let you do this. I won’t let you use me as your plaything! I’m tired of feeling helpless, stewing over all the ways you could fuck me over!”
I blinked.
Luna had moved an inch closer.
My nostrils flared.
“For all of your might and power, you are nothing more than a spoiled child, Luna. You squandered everything and let your people die for what? What possessed you to do any of this? You had a kingdom! Untold riches! A sister who loved you! And you threw it all away!”
Despite the discomfort and watering of my eyes, I forced myself to not blink. I wanted the truth from Luna, not a cheap jumpscare. Trying to wrangle it from her was like drawing blood from a stone.
“This ends now,” I said with finality. “You’re not getting any more new toys to break. You’re done.”
A strange sense of calm overtook me, washing away the conflicting clutter of emotions fighting for dominance. I could still feel my head and neck tingle with fear, but I accepted that. To be brave was to be afraid.
“I refuse to be your victim anymore.”
Luna disappeared.
I cast my gaze around wildly.
The room had gone and changed on me.
The smell was the first clue—the musty mushroom odor that originally wafted around the room was overpowered by the scent of spicy cinnamon.
I quickly spotted the second. The cracks and chips of paint peeling off the walls had been repaired and painted over. Even the omnipresent water damage that dampened and warped the flooring underneath my feet had all but disappeared.
The last clue became blatantly apparent as I turned. No longer in tatters, the queen-sized bed would have been highly enticing had I spotted it in the waking world. Seeing something purpose-built for humans was a sight for sore eyes, and I had no doubt in my mind that I’d have a restful night's sleep tucked underneath its striped black and grey comforter.
The room wasn’t the only thing that changed. I could feel it in my shoulders, which no longer sagged from some unseen burden, and hear it in my chest, with the rhythm of my heart slow and steady. Breathing came easy now, and I no longer felt an everpresent, crushing weight upon my chest.
Was this what courage felt like?
It was an alien sensation. Tonal whiplash. Like an author changing genres mid-story.
I…
I glimpsed at the nightstand out of the corner of my eye.
I want to change. I want to be better.
My eyes squeezed shut.
She wanted me to feel vulnerable. Afraid. Ashamed. Stripping me of my clothes was just another one of her tactics and perhaps the most effective. Surrender to the cold or surrender to her warm embrace—the choice was simple, especially for someone close to the brink.
In the waking world, I had to make do with makeshift togas and sheer spite to stay warm and sane. Here in the depths of my mind?
You have no power over me, Luna. Not anymore.
Tangled thread tied together, snaking across my skin. Pull, push. Twist and turn. A threaded needle, a bundle of cloth. Stitch. Stitch. Stitch.
Black sweatpants, a hoodie, socks, and sneakers. Unoriginal, but comfortable and warm, and in a place like this? Wearing anything at all was a fashion statement.
Pushing myself off the floor, I found that the floorboards no longer creaked as I bounded past the bed in a few powerful strides.
The golden picture frame was fresh off the store shelf, yet I still couldn’t remember them. My gaze and thoughts were lost in their smiling faces.
“I don’t want them to be strangers,” I said, tilting my phone horizontally.
Ka-Chick
There was a time and place for getting lost in existential tangents over my memories, and it wasn’t here and now. So, I turned away, stuffing my phone into my pocket as I approached the door again.
Turn. Pull. The sparkling black of the dream realm’s starry expanse stared back. There was still nothing within sight for miles on end, and the only way seemed to be down into the mirror-still ocean below.
Before, I was sure I would be leaving my sanctuary in the company of Luna or the company of the sea. Even now, I wasn’t sure which choice was preferable; my deep-seated fear of drowning was absolutely justified, after all.
But what if I don’t need to choose?
I closed my eyes and focused.
Find Celestia.
The sound of rumbling and clattering broke the silence as I blinked.
Directly ahead, stone slabs blinked into existence before fusing and grinding together like shifting tectonic plates.
Watching on with amazement, I took the first step, feeling the unyielding hardness of the smoothed-out stone from under my feet. With each step, more chunks of rock materialized from the aether, extending the path before me.
BOOM
Twisting around, I could only see stars.
It didn’t take long for me to find her.
Of course, with the stone path railroading me directly towards the blinking yellow and blue lights in the distance, it was impossible to become lost.
It took even less time to close the wide gap between us.
Even from this distance, I could see Celestia’s panicked wings struggling to keep her aloft. Like every other appearance in my life, Luna seemed absolutely unphased by comparison as they blasted away at each other with nuclear weapons yield spellfire.
She knew she couldn’t win; I knew she couldn’t win, yet Celestia continued to fight on my behalf. Her display of courage was still just that— a display. One that Luna was seemingly taking joy in taking apart piece by piece.
For that reason, I stopped about half a football field’s length away, closed my eyes, and concentrated.
My mind’s eye focused on the blinking blue blur in the distance. My frothing hatred for Luna became a bubbling black mire within me. The feeling of being helpless, powerless, unable to do anything but stand and watch, was all more fuel for the gasoline fire.
But all fires needed a spark.
I searched deeply in every darkened recess of my mind, scrambling for the match that would set it all ablaze. But no matter how many stones were unturned, I couldn’t find anything at all. There was no match. No spark.
C’mon! Not now! She needs me! She needs me!
As Celestia’s golden light waned off in the distance, I reached down into myself.
…
…
…
Empty. Useless.
There was nothing left within me that Luna didn’t scoop out. All that was left was a sad, angry husk of a man. A pathetic worm that couldn’t help others or themselves.
…
I opened my eyes.
My phone was cradled in my hands, and the faces of four strangers were smiling at me.
Glimpses of warmth suddenly flickered through my mind. I immediately chased that feeling down, riding a wave of nostalgia as I did so. Static shot up my arm as I remembered a smell—a fresh, pungent zing followed by musty earth and petrichor.
My eyes drifted toward the vibrant eyes of the daughter and son.
“Summer rain, wash away yesterday’s pain,” I whispered.
It was subtle at first, a fair wind that blew in from somewhere unseen. It rubbed and caressed the skin on my face and trailed down my neck like long-lost lovers reuniting. The scent was next: Petrichor and wet grass. Familiar, just like the dream I had chased down.
The atmosphere shifted next.
Stars, constellations, and every source of light within Luna’s tapestry were meticulously snuffed out by a miasma of black smoke and darkness.
The skies above the two monarchs rumbled.
I turned, staring up into the dark overcast above with my mouth agape.
Arcs of lightning danced across the roiling, thick storm clouds as they converged upon the battlefield like a swarm of soldier ants. As they marched in unison, the brief flashes of white were the only light source within the ensuing darkness. The air suddenly grew humid and thick, swirling around to form an all-encompassing barrier around the forward billow of the storm.
The seas below became agitated from the commotion above, and tall waves the size of skyscrapers began to circle underneath as if they were birds of prey waiting to feast upon carrion.
The alicorn sisters reacted similarly to me, both winged figures in the distance were frozen in place inside the eye of the storm, staring toward the sky.
I cleared my throat, not willing to give up the upper hand, as I glared at Princess Luna.
“Kill,” I said. I had found my spark.
BOOM
White streaks of light converged upon a single point as the thunderclouds all clapped in unison. I watched in grim satisfaction as the distant shape of Princess Luna tumbled down towards the open sea.
BOOM
Another white flash.
Another thunderclap.
A ghost of a smile formed upon my lips.
Luna’s lifeless body inched closer to the drink. The storm followed, rain and wind beneath its black shadow whipping the once calm ocean into a roiling fury. It struck again and again like the wrath of an angry god smiting down an upstart.
One second. Two. The tyrant’s body splashed into the waves and was swallowed up by the sea.
I released the breath I didn’t even notice I was holding. My gaze lingered upon the waves, waiting for Luna to soar upwards in a display of terrifying power.
A minute passed. Two minutes. Three. A cold exhale of wind came, causing me to shiver despite my heavy clothing acting as a buffer against the wind’s chill. I rubbed my hands together but made no move to look away.
Is it over? Is she truly gone?
My chest tingled at the mere thought.
Luna? Dead? Impossible! She always has another trick up her sleeve or another card to play! She couldn’t… it couldn’t be this easy! Could it?
But the longer I looked, the more certain it seemed to be the case. The now murky, cold sea churned below, restless and uncaring of its prisoner trapped beneath the waves. Dream or not, assuming that she somehow survived having her organs and muscles burned from the inside out, she would have been long since dead from drowning.
It was almost too much to process at once, and I couldn’t do anything other than continue to rub absently at my arms.
“Luna! Sister!”
Celestia’s voice echoed softly around the dreamscape; I could barely hear it over the thundercloud's ceaseless rumbling.
A slight pang of regret echoed alongside the warmth radiating through my body. I was close to tears with elation and felt downright vindicated by my actions—but part of me still was weary. Once bitten, twice shy, and I’ve been bitten far more times than I could possibly remember.
No. No, this is an act. This has to be an act. The wrath of Mother Nature isn’t enough to bring down a god.
Dizzy. I was feeling dizzy. My skin tingled alongside the hairs on my neck and arms as I watched, waiting to catch sight of Luna rising above the waves to swat us down like flies. One moment. Two. She wasn’t there.
Where is she? Where the fuck did she go?
“ Luna! ”
I shook my head.
Stone slabs spawned in from out of the aether, fusing together to form another path towards the distraught-
BOOM
Celestia was suddenly engulfed in a flash of white and gold.
“No!” I shouted.
I was already sprinting, the rock path ahead transforming into a set of stairs for me to descend as I threw caution to the wind.
I looked up.
Closer. The overcast sky began to float closer overhead, bathing me in its dark shadow.
My eyes squeezed shut.
“Stop! Dissipate! Begone!” I bellowed.
A gust of gale-force winds blew towards me, swiping me off my feet. Dazed, confused. Pain erupted in the back of my skull.
My unfocused eyes gazed upward.
And closer. The outer edge of the storm’s rain was now falling on the stone path.
BOOM
I raised a hand to shield my eyes, and the rain hammered down, soaking me in an instant.
BOOM
Another white flash and an instant roll of thunder reverberated in my lungs. Rain streamed down my face and into my eyes.
How could this have happened? How could I have lost control so suddenly?
I strained to see, to think. My ears rang like church bells.
A reverberating rumble sounded off overhead.
I was still senseless on the floor, blinking the lingering white spots and water from my eyes as I tried to get back on my feet. The constant noise caused by the storm and the incessant ringing in my eardrums made this impossible.
Lightning flashed, and thunderclouds screamed.
BOOM
CRACK
Brighter than all the others so far, a blinding bolt of white sailed past my head, shearing through the stone steps behind me.
The aftershock of the boom catapulted me upward.
There was no more reflection of the nighttime heavens within the water. No, just like how Luna had peeled back her mask, the sea below was now showing its true face. The waves were gnashing teeth, chomping at the bit for the newest morsel dangling in front of its face.
And just like its master, I knew it would never be satiated. It would always feel the ravenous pains of hunger in the pit of its stomach.
There was no real difference between them, only the execution method.
And somehow, I was less afraid of whatever Luna had planned than drowning.
Panic flared in my chest as I began to plummet.
The ocean’s gaping maw widened.
I tried to think of anything to get me out of this situation: a pair of wings, a jetpack, a ledge for me to break my fall.
None of these worked. I couldn't concentrate on anything except my fear of the waves and what lingered underneath, and part of me knew that I was responsible for empowering it in a twisted feedback loop.
Half the distance between me and my watery demise had already been covered, yet it felt like I was wading through thick molasses in my freefall.
“Flight! Wings! Float!” I screamed desperately.
Lightning and Thunder. Rain and wind. The noise was all-consuming as my world dissolved into a howling nightmare.
All noise, except the whoosh of a pair of wings.
My eyes darted around, trying to see past the downpour of rain.
Gold light.
It took me by surprise.
Not a flash nor a scream from the black heavens above accompanied it. Hammer blows of rain crashed against the light, sizzling and burning like bacon and eggs on a frying pan as my insides lurched. My momentum had suddenly stopped.
The wrathful seas below chewed on its lips before lashing out, black talons outstretched to pluck me out of the sky. My body shot up and forward, cleaving a path through pillars of torrential downpour until I suddenly found myself firmly seated on Celestia’s withers.
“Hold on tight!” Celestia shouted exhaustedly as we were both bathed in ethereal golden light. The all-encompassing noise suddenly evaporated, and I could hear the beating of my heart once more.
“Way ahead of you!” I cried out, clinging onto her neck for dear life.
Celestia frantically beat her wings as she tried to gain altitude.
The storm boomed.
I pressed my head into the back of Celestia’s neck, trying to blink out the lighting flash that seared itself into my retinas.
“Are you alright?” Celestia’s voice seemed so far away even though she was speaking right next to me. Any anger I imagined Celestia harboring for my actions evaporated as her tone softened. “Daniel?”
I groaned out.
“Daniel?!”
The roaring winds blew against us, halting Celestia’s momentum and causing her to jerk upward. My arms constricted around her neck as I nearly lost my grip.
“Just get us out of here!”
“I’m trying!”
The sky cracked again, and another bolt of Zeus's thunder lanced through the heavy air, crashing down just a dozen paces behind us. It was only by sheer luck that the next two didn’t hit us, both crashing down directly ahead in a display of power even Celestia herself couldn’t seemingly match.
“But this is just a dream! Just teleport us out of here or wake us up!” I shouted. “Why does any of this even matter?”
“If none of this mattered, why haven’t you jumped already?” Light and an instant thunderclap followed her retort. Celestia shook her head. “There is no time to argue or place blame! I need you to save your strength and focus! You’re the only one who can dispel the storm before it leaks into the material plane!”
“But how? And why should I care?” I spoke in a rush. “There’s nothing for me to go back to! And besides, I can’t even think clearly enough to conjure up a dust bunny, let alone reign in this fucking storm!”
Rumble. Flickering Lightning. Endless rain. Flapping wings.
“Yes, you can!” Celestia cried out. “It’s fueled by your emotions!”
“And I change them more often than someone changes socks! What makes you think I can control them? What makes you think I can just will this bullshit away with a wave of my hand?”
“Because this isn’t who you are!”
The roaring of the waves. The angered shrieks of the clouds. It was all pure, undiluted hate. Unexplainable rage. The storm was the champagne that spewed out of the bottle after popping off the cork.
“...I can’t.”
“Daniel- “
“Don’t you see? This is all I have left!”
“That’s not true!”
“But it is! I can’t remember a goddamn thing before this because she took everything from me! My life, my memories, my family! They’re all just fucking museum pieces now, collecting dust in whatever vault Luna tossed them away in!”
Celestia dived lower, twisting around another scattershot of lightning as it grazed us. An endless downpour of raindrops continued to fizzle against the golden energy shield.
“You have every right to feel this way,” Celestia replied solemnly. “After everything, your anger for my sister is unquestionably justified. But deep down, you know this anger isn’t pointed toward her alone, is it?”
KRRASSH BOOM
Shattered skies cracked open. Celestia swiftly dodged another strike.
“What do you want me to say, Celestia? That I hate myself for being weak? Useless? Because you’re right! I’m just a clueless fucking moron that has to rely on others for help! I can’t do anything right myself!”
The pointless, rage-fueled tirade continued to tumble out of my mouth as I felt my muscles and veins straining against my skin. “I’m so tired of feeling helpless and weak! I’m tired of the changing goalposts! I’m tired of jumping at every shadow!”
“And I’m tired of forgetting!”
Three more flashes. Three direct hits. The golden light surrounding us flickered, and the winds howled like wolves trailing a wounded deer.
“I can hardly remember their voices anymore! Their faces! It’s all just colors and white noise because your whore of a sister stole my memories, and there’s nothing I can do about it!” The words scratched at my dried throat as I abused my vocal cords. “I’m afraid to close my eyes and rest for even a moment because I know she’ll be waiting for me! Taunting me!”
My throat burned. The storm continued its tantrum.
Celestia’s golden light enveloped us once again.
“You are not weak,” Celestia stated. “You are not weak for being subjected to the torment my sister put you through.”
“I couldn’t stop her,” I insisted.
“And you think that this is a failing on your part?” Celestia responded. “Her power is outside the realm of any context that you, or any mortal, could fathom. No amount of planning or forewarning could have changed this outcome for you or anyone else put in your place.”
“That just proves my point.”
“No. It only proves mine,” Celestia’s wings flapped and flexed as we knifed through a low-hanging stormcloud. “After all the evil she inflicted upon you, you are still unquestionably yourself. Beyond all this fear and hatred lies a soul, unbound and unbroken.”
Celestia’s face turned towards me slightly, and I stared deeply into her pale magenta eye.
“Don’t you see, Daniel? Even with all of her power, not once has she broken you. Not once have you willingly yielded to her.”
I broke eye contact first.
“She’ll come back,” I said despondently.
“You will be ready to face her this time,” Celestia said resolutely. “And I will stand beside you.”
I sucked a mouthful of humid air into my lungs as butterflies fluttered about in the pit of my stomach. The cold and heavy burden I placed upon myself was still there, along with all the self-loathing it implied. One pep talk would never be enough to solve this issue, but I needed to focus on the now instead of the past.
I needed time to think. I needed quiet and peace of mind.
“Can you teleport us out of here?”
Celestia’s eyes widened for a moment before she shook her head. “I would need to lower the shield first, and I cannot predict where we will end up.”
“But we can’t stay here! The storm is expanding faster than we can outrun it!”
Celestia remained silent, her eyes focused directly ahead of her before finally responding. “We will have to make due! I will attempt to fly above the clouds and buy you some time!”
We began to ascend upward at an angle, causing my legs to squeeze against her sides as my body lurched backward.
“Dissipate! Cease!” I repeated as a mantra, watching as the darkened overcast began to shift. Lightning bolts streaked passed, the storm attempting to predict our flight path as the skies around us exploded in a cacophony of violence.
Ascending. The frenzied seas below gnashed their teeth as the distance between us widened.
“Dissipate! Cease!” I continued. Amidst the seemingly impenetrable overcast, a font of silvery moonlight slithered through the cracks. I couldn’t tell if it was the light at the end of the tunnel or the sign of an ill omen.
The storm clouds regrouped, filling the gaps in their ranks as they relentlessly pelted us with torrential rains.
Up and up further. I squeezed my eyes shut as Zeus’s arrows came crashing down on us. Several dozen booms assaulted my thoroughly abused eardrums.
We closed in. The air pushed down, flattening me against Celestia’s back. It was so hard to breathe that I could no longer speak, yet I held on. It was all in my head. This anger was my emotions, not some freak storm or accident.
I was in control here.
KRRASSH BOOM
The storm clouds were within reach, a dark gray and flat black plain.
“Cease!” The words reverberated within my body as I tried screaming to the high heavens. I couldn't hear or see anything within the thundering blackness of the storm. It was a complete annihilation of the senses.
It didn’t mean I wasn’t feeling anything at all, though.
The difficulty breathing came first. The rapidly thinning air and chest pain caused my sudden shortness of breath, and I wheezed with each pained exhale. My lungs overclocked, trying to fill in the lack of oxygen intake by breathing even faster.
It didn’t help.
My respiratory system was still under constant abuse as my eardrums suddenly popped. My sense of hearing was once again stolen from me as a sharp ringing sounded off inside my ear canals.
The rapid cold came a few moments later. Perhaps it was due to some outside factor—my body’s way of screaming at me to wake up before the freezing temperatures turned me into a human popsicle in the waking world.
“-aniel!”
Or perhaps everything I had felt up to this point in the dream realm wasn’t a figment of my imagination, and emotions weren’t the sole arbiter of reality in this sunless place.
“Daniel!”
My ears popped-
-and then warmth. It spread across my body, snatching me from the cold’s icy talons as my breathing slowed to a steady pace. I blinked, pushing my head out from the crest of Celestia’s neck, and looked down below.
Above the sheet of foggy glass was peace—a world where the winds, rain, and flashing lightning did not reach.
But that was only a matter of perspective. The infinite starfield above and the ever-expanding grey plain below were different frames of mind, and a healthy mind was able to experience both.
Celestia craned her head towards me.
I closed my eyes and centered myself.
Hate. Hate. Hate. Hatred of Luna, myself, and missing pieces that I couldn’t put a face, time, or place to. The phantom ghosts of cold, hard eyes. The sound of unintelligible jeers and taunts. The elevated pulse and dried throat from witnessing something horrific.
It was then that I came to a startling realization.
This storm wasn’t the hatred of one man.
It was a collage—a collaborated effort of dozens of people to paint a single canvas with different shades of red. A collection of voices all howling with rage in solitary over the same injustice.
“ENOUGH!”
The stars shifted. Unfamiliar galaxies and constellations were brushed aside. Comets raced across the sky, trying to escape the gravity of the full moon that had materialized from the shadows.
Celestia’s ears pinned themselves down to the sides of her head, and I felt her magic press me down against her back as her whole body trembled. I suffered a similar reaction, my fingers digging into the fluffy tuft below Celestia’s neck as my skin crawled.
A harsh blade of moonlight, brighter than the sun's rays, bore upon us.
Princess Luna glared down at us from atop her unwavering lunar throne.
Author's Note
Credit to Neither for the fantastic art and INeedSleep and UnamusedWaffle for helping me edit this chapter!
I will start work on the final two chapters soon, but I don't have an eta for the release date due to my hectic schedule and the scope of these chapters being much larger than I anticipated.
I felt Luna’s gaze pierce through her sister and into me.
The football field’s distance between us and the harsh blades of moonlight blinding us didn’t matter—I could still see her turquoise eyes boring into me like a disapproving mother. Beads of sweat crawled down my eyebrows, and I resisted the urge to wilt into the crest behind Celestia’s neck for shelter.
It felt like an eternity, but Luna’s eyes finally trailed downward toward the roiling clouds beneath us. Her eyes glittered dangerously as a harsh growl escaped her lips.
“This…” Luna’s voice trailed off, lost for words at what she was seeing.
Luna’s horn glowed.
Celestia fired, and I flinched from the sudden spellcraft as the bolt of energy raced toward Luna. To Celestia’s disappointment and my despondence, the spell was swatted away like an annoying gnat as Luna rolled her eyes.
There was no counterattack, with Luna seemingly content to continue channeling mana into whatever spell she was casting. The bright indigo glow of her horn intensified, and wisps of magic began to travel downwards like slithering snakes toward the clouds below.
A few agonizing seconds passed.
My jaw hung open in shock.
One spell.
One spell was all it took to squish down the plain of endless glass into a ball the size of my fist. The culmination of anger and torment from dozens of people was reduced to a foggy snow globe. Her gaze hardened even further at the sight of her new paperweight, twisting it around in her magic like a cat swatting at a ball of yarn before turning back to us.
“What mockery is this, Sister? Art thou so craven that thou would defile the tapestry of our glorious night with this devilry?” Within the blink of an eye, she became close. Uncomfortably so—crossing half a football field just to berate and gaslight us.
Smoldering heat emanated from Celestia’s glowing horn as she tensed at the sudden movement, causing beads of sweat to drip off my brows.
“How can you be so blind, Luna?” Celestia shook her head in defiance, wings fanning out in an aggressive posture like a strutting peacock. “Do you not see all of this as a consequence of your actions? Or are you so delusional that you must project all of your failings onto me?”
“Lies! Thy hatred of us hath poisoned thy mind, sister!” Luna’s booming voice cut her off. She waved one of her forehooves before thrusting it in my direction like a dagger. “And thou corrupted our child with thy folly!”
“You’re not fooling me with the act, princess!” I retorted, poking my head around Celestia’s neck to glare at the moon. “We all know what you did to me—what you plan to do! And we’re not going to stand aside and let you get away with it either!”
“ What lies hath the craven wench told thee, child? ” Like flicking a light switch, Luna’s voice changed from the harsh tones of a cold authoritarian despot to the soothing tones of a kindergartner teacher. Seeing my cold gaze leveled at her, she doubled down upon her act. “Canst thou not comprehend the severity of thy situation? We only want what is best for thee!”
I bit down on my tongue.
Stinging pain and the taste of copper filled my mouth in that brief moment of cowardice—a sudden, unwanted reflex.
Witnessing her in person was terrifying in its own right, but nothing made my skin crawl and my heart stop faster than Luna’s sudden mood swings. Serene one moment, wrathful the next. It was something that caused every fiber of my being to scream at me in unison—something born from an experience I couldn’t remember but predated almost all of my other fears, bar none.
I closed my eyes in abject shame, waiting to feel the coldness of the frigid open air of the throne room against my skin…but nothing changed. I was still trapped in this nightmare.
“ Ch ild?”Luna said anxiously. “Please, be not afraid.”
I did not look at her. I couldn’t, even if I wanted to. My anxiety had a vice-like grip on my chest, squeezing all of the air in my lungs. My breathing was staggered, and each breath was a pained wheeze that scraped the insides of my throat and lungs.
Spite and anger had been my primary fuel source, the counterbalance to the constant pangs of fear that haunted me. Without it, all of my doubts bubbled up to the surface, forcing me into a downward spiral of depression and nihilism. With each strained cough, I felt my resistance waver ever so slightly.
“Enough, sister!” Princess Celestia yelled back. “You have caused Daniel enough grief!”
“We tire of thy prattle! His panic is of thy doing, so cease, we say! Surrender forthwith, and we may forgive thy transgressions!”
I could scarcely think enough to be coherent as I opened my eyes. Luna’s presence loomed over us like a shadow, eclipsing the rays of harsh moonlight as her wings fanned out. She was a bird of prey, waiting to swoop down and dig its cruel talons into the flesh of its victim. Proud. Without remorse.
But beyond the imposing dream avatar of the princess, past the pattern of stars that flowed through her mane, I caught sight of the fogged snow globe floating beside her. The storm swirled, fighting with all its might against its bonds. It pushed and shoved against the glass, but some unseen force halted its forward momentum, corralling and fencing it into the center.
Desperation lent itself to sudden inspiration, and a brief moment of clarity washed over me as I leaned forward.
“Keep her talking. Buy me some time,” I whispered, the coppery taste of blood still in my mouth.
I didn’t wait for a response.
Instead, I focused inward, my mind’s eye committing every single aspect of the invisible burden on my chest to memory. It was an uphill battle, and I knew I would not be able to tune out the heated quarreling between the sisters, but my fear of falling into Luna’s loving embrace a second time spurred me onward.
As soon as I latched onto the vice-like grip which constricted my lungs, I immediately began channeling that exact sensation onto the glass orb in Luna’s grip.
“Crush. Crush. Crush,” I began to whisper.
“It won’t be any different. They will shun you and your eternal night just as our subjects did before,” Celestia said, garnering the brunt of Luna’s ire.
“Silence!” Luna’s voice boomed. “Hath thou no shame? Or hath thou truly forgotten thy sinful act? ’Tis thou who stole the sun from our subjects and defiled our home! Not us!”
“I remember a very different chain of events, sister ,” Celestia responded venomously. “Choosing to ignore and forget your crimes does not absolve you of them!”
“We care not for thy petty lies nor lust for power. Nay, this crown is little more than a burden, one that we shall gladly cast aside for the sake of our child, but thou wouldn’t understand. Thou hath never tended to the needs of a child, nursed them back to health, and cared for them with genuine love and affection.
“Thou only cared for appeasing thy vanity, strutting for the fleeting affection of starved peasants and upstart nobles!”
I could feel the anger radiating off of Celestia as she bristled, almost breaking my concentration entirely. Her nostrils flared before continuing to speak, “Daniel can’t replace him, Luna! He-”
“He is no replacement! Our maternal love for him is genuine, and we will not allow thee to take him from us!”
“He is not your property!” Celestia declared. “And no amount of self-delusion will change that!”
“And what would thou have us do? Turn him loose to the snow? Or send him back alone to a world that has forgotten him? His family is naught but dust, taken by the ravages of time. There is no future for him there, and he would be slain within a fortnight—if not by his hand, then that of his kind’s indifference.”
I stopped.
The storm thrashed inside its shrinking cage. Despite its slow compression, it was getting stronger, even warping the bubble as it grew tighter.
Looking up, I stared directly into Luna’s turquoise eyes and felt nothing.
I wanted to feel something—anything other than fear or self-loathing. But she had stolen another piece of my soul from me. Perhaps she did this on purpose, pushing all of my buttons in a way that would throw me off balance.
Or perhaps this was the honest truth.
I looked on despondently between Luna and the glass orb, numb to everything except the pain in my chest as I slowly starved myself of oxygen.
“That was never your call to make!” Celestia growled. “But his choice never mattered to you! We both know you could have saved him from all of this heartache and reunited him with his family from the start! But no! I was forced to watch powerlessly as you continued this abhorrent farce!”
“Thou knoweth not what thou speak of! ” Luna hissed, waving one of her forehooves in a grand gesture. “He was delirious and upon the brink of death when we found him! No mortal medicine would have kept him alive from such grievous injuries and illness!”
“And after that? When you decided to enslave him as your personal plaything?” Celestia’s barbed words cut deeper into Luna’s thin skin, and the moon goddess's eyes narrowed. “Did you have his best interests in mind then?”
The sensation of invisible needles immediately assaulted every pore of my skin. Beneath me, I could feel as that same sensation coursed through Celestia’s skin as she shuddered and clenched her teeth.
A massive build-up of ethereal indigo energy formed before Luna in an instant, on a scale far grander than I had ever witnessed. Clouds of dark blue magic coalesced into a singular point like a tornado—one grand enough to make Mother Nature weep with envy and make my storm look like a pitiful late afternoon drizzle by comparison.
Celestia lowered her horn, the air hissing as sparks of golden sorcery were willed into existence. Apprehension fluttered away in my stomach—a part of me was screaming at me about Luna and how she was toying with us.
My hunch was correct, as Celestia’s spellfire instantly bridged the fifty yards toward the moon tyrant. There was no doubt in my mind that she could have dodged the spell with ease but instead allowed it to connect to hammer home the same point again.
A microsecond passed. The spell splashed harmlessly off Luna’s fur.
Celestia fired again. Once. Twice.
Luna ignored Celestia completely as she continued to channel into the dark blue cloud of magic above her head, building it higher and higher.
“Crush! Crush!” I shouted, reaching out with my hand and clenching my fist.
Celestia screamed in rage, pouring everything she had into her spells as she continued to fire with reckless abandon.
Luna flicked her horn.
It was too fast for me to see what had happened.
One moment, I was clinging onto Celestia for dear life. The next, blue threads of magic tugged at my arms and legs, suspending me into the air.
“Celestia!” I screamed. I could only watch powerlessly as an expanding afterimage of blue sparks crashed into Celestia, causing her to plummet into the starry ocean below. Her screams were cut short by the punctuated sound of splashing water.
“There. My unruly sister has been seen to. And now…”
The world around me shifted, and I instantly felt the icy chill of Luna’s breath on my face. I began to tug at my bonds in a blind panic. Beyond her expression of utmost fear and desperation, I caught sight of that same hunger in her eyes as in that accursed photo.
Just as quickly as it came, Luna blinked it away—a vain attempt to hide behind a mask of empathy.
“Now, we must repair the hurt my sister hath caused thee,” Luna said in a depressed tone. She gently touched my shoulder with a wing, gazing at me with a hurtful and concerned expression. “Lest we allow the rot inside thee to fester.”
“Stay away from me!” I shouted, shrugging off her wing as I thrashed about wildly. Luna shook her head and made to embrace me with her wings as I tried to lean away. “I said stay back!”
“We mean thee no harm, child.” More indigo magic spiraled up onto her horn as she nuzzled her face into the back of my neck. “But thou art unwell, in body and soul, and we must mend thee.”
“The only person who’s sick is you!” I cried out. I could scarcely think a coherent thought as I looked upwards, eyes darting around the moonlit sky. “Everything wrong with this fucked up world is your fault, yet you still can’t get it through your thick skull!”
“We will do whatever is necessary to protect thee, even from yourself,” Luna whispered hauntingly. “We do not fault thee for being disillusioned by our sister, but we cannot allow you to persist in this folly for a moment more.”
The pins and needles in my skin drilled into my muscles as Luna lowered her horn toward my head. I clenched my teeth, and my muscles stretched like putty as I tried to pry my limbs free. My lungs were on fire as if I was drowning underneath the waves below, and the anxiety clamping down on my chest made breathing impossible.
I felt like I was going to burst like a zit.
“It is time to rest, little one.”
The sound of glass shattering reached my ears.
A flash of white seared itself into my eyes.
BOOM
Noise. All-encompassing noise shattered my eardrums, and I almost couldn’t even hear the thoughts inside my head. But even without my sense of hearing, I could still feel. I could feel the sudden increase in blood flow to my extremities, my elevated pulse, and the edgy, twitchy feeling that coincided with an adrenaline rush.
“Nay! We will not fail thee! Not again!” Luna bellowed. Her horn was already glowing, ready to cast the same spell she had previously used to contain the storm. One second. Two. Five.
The sky exploded.
Luna’s grip slackened in an instant.
Another flash lightened the already bright sky like a flashbang.
BOOM
Luna’s horn had acted as an impromptu lightning rod, taking the full force of the impact. The smell of burnt flesh forced its way into my nose, causing me to gag as I slumped forward against my restraints. Not a moment later, charred feathers scattered about into the winds, and my eyes darted around the stormy sky.
Dark blue and gray clouds clashed for dominance directly above, blotting out the looming presence of the moon and encasing me in darkness once more.
It was impossible to concentrate, not just due to the howling winds and inclement weather but also due to my compromised mental state. Switching from crippling anxiety and fear to ulcer-inducing rage within an instant was taking a toll on me, and I didn’t know how I was still able to think in coherent sentences.
But in between the freezing rain pelting down upon me and the uncontrollable body tremors running havoc across my adrenaline-drugged body, I had an epiphany.
Why fight against the current? Why not just flow with it instead?
Beyond all the self-loathing, I wanted to survive. I wanted to put this all behind me and live a life worth living to spite Luna. I wanted to prove her wrong, that I could be something without her protection.
And unlike in the waking world, I had a chance now to make things stick. I had the power to change things for the better.
I looked up to the roiling overcast above.
My clothes turned sodden from the continuous downpour, sticking to my skin as the feeling of pins and needles slowly began to return in earnest. Luna was undoubtedly going to try to diffuse the situation, and I was vulnerable each second she remained unchecked.
“Release me!” I shouted with all of my might into the vast blackness.
My voice was instantly lost in the howling wind. The storm clouds drifted overhead, uncaring of my plight.
Precious seconds passed. Pins and needles in my skin pricked at me, digging into the tender muscle underneath. My hands clenched and unclenched, and I could feel globs of spittle building in the corners of my mouth.
My anger swelled up inside me before I let out a guttural roar, “Release Me!”
…
Static filled the air.
White lightning flashed across the sky-
BOOM
A thunderclap.
I didn’t notice I was in free fall until I blinked the bright spots out of my eyes. I saw the waves below churning like the acid in the pit of my stomach. My life flashed before my eyes as the seas beckoned.
“Flight! Fly! Soar! Please!” I cried out in equal parts fear and rageful desperation.
Out of the corner of my eye, a bright spot blurred and weaved through the storm. It dived, outrunning the streaks of lightning that danced about underneath the clouds as it raced toward me.
A pillar of water shot out from the blackened waves, reaching out.
The blur reached me first.
I felt a tug toward it from the soppy fabric of my shirt peeling off on my skin. It snatched me from my demise.
Air suddenly filled my lungs as flesh and tendons shifted, allowing the wings to stitch themselves to the upper spine. I unfurled my plume of golden wings, feeling an alien sensation of strain upon the aerodynamic taper of my new limbs.
A yellow glow shimmered around me, vaporizing the endless torrents of rain on contact as I swooped upward, gaining acceleration.
Up and up. I kept my eyes peeled, looking to catch sight of any shapes in the distance. Within the unfurling chaos and intermittent flashes of white, I spotted Luna only a few dozen yards away as I struggled against a sudden violent updraft.
She snapped in my direction, eyes wide. Blue sparks fizzled into existence from her horn as she started to cast a spell, and I felt the last shred of my composure shatter like glass. There was no time to contemplate a plan or try to distract her.
Following my gut instinct, I lifted my left hand into the sky and brought it down.
Provoked, the roiling thunderclouds above answered my call. Screaming, howling winds strong enough to lift houses from their foundations billowed and crashed into Luna, but she stubbornly held firm. Her horn glimmered in ethereal magic, cascading into a font of blinding indigo.
A hail of thunderbolts rained down upon her.
“Daniel!” Luna’s voice superseded the roar of the storm. Not a single bolt of lightning found its mark—she deftly dodged each strike with the grace of a dove and the speed of a falcon as the booming of thunder drowned out everything else. With wings outstretched, she coasted through the gale-force winds without any hindrance as she barreled toward me. “Cease thy foolishness at once!”
I silently retorted with another barrage of lightning.
By pure luck, a lance of indigo magic Luna retaliated with grazed past my left ear and shot off into the distance. With a heavy downstroke, followed by a successive bout of powerful wing strokes, I was able to bank right and maintain altitude as three more beams shot wide.
The feathers on my golden wings quivered.
“We beseech thee! Thou knoweth not of the evil-”
The four sharp, golden pinions that launched themselves from my wings were missiles, rocketing toward the alicorn and predicting her flight paths as they closed the gap. All four had found their mark less than a second later, piercing deeply into her haunches and flank, drawing blood.
A pained gasp escaped her lips, and a ghost of a smile formed upon mine.
My brief moment of satisfaction morphed into a grimace as I watched the razor-like feathers get unceremoniously ejected from her already-closing wounds. Within the blink of an eye, the flesh had knotted itself back together. Within two more, there was no indication that I had landed a single hit; her midnight blue fur looked just as impeccable as it always had.
“Does thou see the futility of thine actions now? Or will we need to discipline thee, ungrateful whelp?” A blue shimmer encompassed her form as she spoke.
I raced forward in silent fury.
Luna let out a cry of rage.
I dove upward through a patchwork of clouds, the constant barrage of lightning covering my retreat from Luna’s relentless attacks before retaliating with another fan of razor-sharp feathers. Like before, they tracked her every movement as the makeshift heatseekers homed in until Luna disappeared in a flash of blue-
-and reappeared within spitting distance from me.
I didn’t even have a moment to respond as a layer of ice caked itself onto my skin—right beneath both my layers of clothes and my personal energy shield.
Luna was immediately upon me, wrapping two powerful forelegs and both her wings around my body. My bones began to creak from the pressure, but she held firm, staring at me with a disapproving gaze.
One extra ounce of force would shatter me in half like a twig, and both of us knew it.
“Our patience grows thin!” Luna chastised, her horn glowing. “Submit!”
Frostbite began to crawl up my extremities, and I lost all feeling from my wings, toes, and fingers as the sensation crept up toward my torso. Fatigue began to set in, and my eyes fluttered as everything below my neckline chilled.
I lunged my head forward and landed a solid headbutt on her muzzle.
“Insolent child!” She barely flinched at my act of defiance. Given my disorientation, it took me a moment to comprehend what she was saying. But by that point, it was already too late. She squeezed tighter, and whatever spell she had cast upon me hastened—my entire body began to numb from the cold.
But I wasn’t ready to throw in the towel.
A flash of white. A burst of thunder. A shimmering hue of dark blue.
Luna’s shields completely nullified the effects of my attack, and each subsequent lightning strike did little to deter her as she continued to freeze me solid. I was out of options and out of time,
My eyes grew heavy, and Luna began to whisper sweet nothings into my ears as my vision blurred. It was only when my sight was shrouded in darkness that I remembered it—a spark. Something that I kept forgetting I had, but relying upon to chase away the dark.
“Burn.”
Frost-bitten skin became flushed with sweat, and numbness was replaced by searing pain as I became a human matchstick. I couldn’t smother the scream that escaped my chapped lips, and neither could Luna as she recoiled away.
The surprised expression morphed into shock, and the panicked fluttering of Luna’s wings intensified as a sulfurous odor reached my nostrils. Sparks of flame danced underneath the shield, lapping at the fur on her chest.
Luna shrieked.
I held my hands to my ears, fighting against the concussive spike of force from her pained scream as it bludgeoned into me like a cannonball.
Thankfully, what would have been a lethal blow against a frail, defenseless human registered as little more than a sucker punch to the gut. Painful, but the adrenaline coursing through every vein in my body numbed it enough for me to concentrate.
I smiled through the pain. The protective enchantment of this shield spell was worth a princess’s ransom, and I was ready and willing to abuse it to its full potential. Calling forth the storm, I mentally prepared myself as the clouds above rumbled once again.
My heart pounded with excitement and fear as a gust of city-rending winds slammed against my back, forcing the air out of my lungs as I shot forward. There were no wild currents for my wings to tame, no need to push against gravity. My wings expanded from my sides as I glided toward the rapidly retreating flicker of light in the distance.
The world around me became a blur of unrecognizable shapes and colors as pressure built up in my ears and my chest tightened, but I kept focusing on the retreating figure of the lunar princess in front of me.
The fire had already been extinguished, and the crisp flesh was already sloughing off and being replaced by strands knitting together.
A moment later, I broke the sound barrier.
I greedily drank up the rush of adrenaline and exhilaration flowing through me like a man dying of thirst. In the few memories I could salvage, I had never felt this free or alive. The winds shook and buffeted as I flew, the pressure and heat building around me as the air turned into burning plasma.
Luna didn’t have time to react.
My punch crunched against the glass-like shimmer of her shield, just a hairbreadth away from her face. There was a split second of confusion on her muzzle before her eyes widened at the sudden gout of flame and the gust of galeforce wind that blasted forth from my closed fist.
To my dismay, the flames scattered around her.
Her magic defenses were too robust, and that wasn’t even counting for her innate durability. There was no weapon I could conceive that was sharp enough to cut into her hide, let alone drain her shields.
“Empower,” I said with conviction, holding out my right hand in front of me.
But I didn’t need a weapon to kill her.
And Luna soon realized this, too, as she began to silently gasp for air.
Her horn flared indigo as she tried to use her expansive repertoire of spells and hexes to counter mine. Despite her best efforts, she couldn’t cast a single one—the sparks clung uselessly to her horn as if a film of invisible saran wrap was coiled around it. Not even sound could pierce the film barrier, which made Luna’s frantic struggle all the more eerie.
It had been a split-second decision—her shields had proven to be effective to nearly everything else I threw at her, and she could heal from anything that wasn’t a lethal blow. For this reason, I threw caution to the wind.
For this reason, I used her own defenses against her.
It was such a simple idea. Luna’s shields were already nigh invulnerable, but there was a threshold, and after everything, she was still a creature of flesh and blood. She still needed to breathe.
It was as simple as flicking a switch: one moment, air was allowed to pass through her shield. The next, it wasn’t.
Her widened turquoise eyes hyper-focused on me, her face contorted into that of pure, animalistic terror as she continued to hack and wheeze. Luna started hyperventilating uselessly, and a tiny ember of empathy flared up inside me.
…
I immediately smothered it in its crib before clenching my fist. Running out of oxygen, feeling the air escape my burning lungs while struggling to fill them again—it was all old hat to me. How often did I struggle to breathe after being relentlessly chased or hacking out my lungs after she tried to drown me?
How many times did I wonder if each breath would be my last?
…
Luna blinked, her horn growing brighter with each futile gasp for air. Had she been in her right mind, I have no doubt she would have been able to dispel her shield effortlessly or teleport away. But she wasn’t, and that was all that mattered.
Panting and wheezing. Luna’s legs uselessly kicked and dangled beneath her, and her gasps of air became erratic. Slowed. The strain was proving to be too much, even for her.
One second. Four. Luna thrashed about wildly, like a hummingbird set ablaze. Someone who had their wits about them would know to try and stop gasping and breathe slowly. But in the heat of the moment, who followed that advice? Pain was pain, and making it stop always came before all else.
Luna blinked, struggling to keep her eyes open and afraid to close them. Once. Twice. Three times.
My fist remained clenched.
Four. Five. Six.
The sixth time was different, and so were the seventh and eighth. With each blink, it was as if the sclera of her eyes were becoming… infected by the turquoise of her irises.
Nine. Luna’s eyes remained closed.
A pregnant silence filled the air.
The veins in my hands and arm bulged as I kept my fist clenched shut. Taking a deep breath, I flicked my wrist.
Luna’s limbs swayed like wind chimes in a hurricane, her head flopping. More seconds passed, and I felt my heart race with each passing moment.
The storm ceased its incessant rumbling.
My chest tightened at the slightest twitch. It was impossible to tell if they were the death spasms from muscles rubbery from the lack of oxygen or if she was still alive, despite all odds. There was no clear way to tell—there was too much adrenaline pumping through my veins for me to unclench my fist even if I wanted to.
Another twitch. Another mirage. Another after-effect of a gruesome death. A quivering ear. A swaying leg. A twitching wing.
My right arm trembled.
An eyelid twitched.
My wings flapped erratically at my sides.
I could only stare in terror when a pair of draconic eyes stared back—vertical black slits in a sea of turquoise bored a hole directly into my soul.
No sound accompanied the guttural scream that escaped her gaping maw, which was now filled with rows of razor-sharp, bleached white teeth. Tendrils of shadow oozed from the corners of her eyes, seeping in through the skin-tight cracks in her makeshift prison before engrossing her form completely.
“Empower!” I shouted again. All of my chips went into this one bet as I poured every ounce of strength I had into crushing Luna like a soda can. But no matter how much I squeezed, the hideous mass of dark tendrils pushed back threefold. It was like holding back a river with a frail, worn-down dam.
My body began to convulse as I struggled with all of my might to keep my fist closed. I could hear my blood rushing in my ears as my back muscles spasmed and twitched, and a dull pressure pressed against the left side of my chest, right above my heart.
Before I could begin to truly process any of this, the dam broke.
I couldn’t recover fast enough.
A lance of indigo light slammed into my shielded chest like a freight train, and everything became a blur—the golden hues of my personal shield mixed with the gray overcast of the sky and the dark black shade of the ocean waves below. Up was down, and down was up.
Thunder was ringing in my head. The storm above cried out in abhorrent rage.
“Thou art outmatched!” The wind’s howls carried Luna’s voice to my ears. “And we have only begun to tap into our strength!”
Immediately, the volume of spellfire increased. I tried to respond in kind, directing the storm to cover my retreat as I tried to maintain distance, but Luna was always two steps ahead. There was no cover, no place to hide from Luna’s attacks as her movements became erratic and impossible to predict.
Indigo light illuminated the overcast skies as beams of light speared through the cloud cover. I quickly fortified my location with meter-thick blocks of bedrock, titanium, and anything solid and durable I could conjure up. It soon became a fortress, one that could weather both the storm and Luna’s aggression as long as I maintained my defenses.
I then tried to protect myself by increasing the storm’s severity, but she was completely unphased by its all-consuming, thundering blackness. She flew faster than the wind with unparalleled grace and weaved through the endless torrent of lightning and rain in a display that would reduce even the harshest of critics to tears.
It was just another mind game—another wrench in the gears to throw me off balance. The simple fact that I could barely track her movements was proof that she was toying with me, and Luna knew she could utterly annihilate me without any effort if she really wanted to.
“Our love for thee is unmatched by all, but be not mistaken, child! We will not spare thee the rod! Not when thou hath spurned our kindness for our sister’s treachery!” Luna loudly proclaimed, breaking my concentration.
This sudden bout of indecision caused me to freeze up, and the situation soon dissolved into a game of cat and mouse.
Between Luna’s spells and my lightning, we kept each other at a distance, probing the defenses of the other while unwilling to commit to a close-range brawl. It was a war of attrition, one that I was bound to lose by default unless I rethought my strategy.
By a stroke of pure luck, a single lightning bolt connected. The flash of white crashed into the side of the dark blur in the night, drawing a pained grunt from the alicorn that the storm's winds carried to my ears.
Rather than feel excitement, however, I felt another rush of anxiety press down onto my chest and churn my stomach.
Did she purposely forgo her shields so I couldn’t pull the same trick twice? …It’s not like she needs it. She can heal faster than I can tag her. How the hell am I supposed to put her down?
“A lucky hit, child,” Luna’s voice boomed. “But thou will not land another.”
Another spell. Another multi-meter wall of titanium reduced to metal splinters. Another boom of thunder.
This repeated for agonizing minutes, with me having to deal with the tedium of micromanaging my fortress's defenses while also living in fear of what Luna was planning next. That fear soon became realized as another wall crumbled.
In haste, I conjured another titanium slab in its spot.
But it was too late. There was no time to react, breathe, or even blink. The human eye was not designed to catch sight of something that fast, and I could only perceive the spell that had already made its way through my defenses as a blur.
It passed through the golden sheen surrounding my body, disappearing as fast as it had come as it splashed against the elbow of my left arm, eating through the black fabric of my hoodie. A moment of silence followed, where everything seemed to stop all at once.
The affected flesh soon became red with irritation, making the inside of my mouth dry and sticky just from seeing it.
And then the skin began to chafe and flake.
The sunburn spread both ways, speeding towards my hand and up my shoulder like cancer and inflaming it with excruciating, scalding heat. I began to scream as the smell of my burning flesh filtered into my sinuses.
“We take no pleasure in this, but we must make thou see the consequences of thine actions! Those who live by the sword art slain by it, and we will not have thee follow in our sister’s sinful hoofsteps!”
Without my intervention, Luna was able to begin dismantling my stronghold piecemeal. Either out of sheer sadism or as a twisted form of love, she did so as slowly as possible, forcing me to writhe in agony while waiting for her tender loving care .
I fumbled mentally, trying to fight through the pain. Another layer of titanium was dragged away, and another pained scream choked down my throat as the burn continued to spread uncontested, traveling up my shoulder and spreading toward my chest and neck.
“We impart this lesson upon thee out of love. We do not hold thee in contempt. Nay, we withheld no truth when we vowed to thee before. Of how we would trade our moon and stars to be by thy side forevermore.”
An unbidden ghost of a memory came to the forefront of my mind. Smells, tastes, and sounds I couldn’t place. But I could remember the emotional turmoil, and I cross-referenced them with another, more recent memory.
In both, I felt like I was a child.
In both, I was hiding under a bed.
A yell from someone just outside of view. The struggle to keep silent as I held my breath. The desire to turn invisible and numb myself from the fear I felt.
I latched onto that desire, squeezing my watery eyes shut and attempting to block out all outside stimuli as I held my breath. With my skin and the muscles beneath it set ablaze, ignoring the pain was impossible, even as I pleaded to my newfound power for alms.
Even so, I pressed on, willing for my desire to be made manifest.
“This has not changed. After we cleanse the taint from thee, all will be well, and thy happiness will be everlasting. This, we swear!”
The last walls of my inner sanctum began to crumble, and moonlight spilled down through the ever-widening cracks onto me. Instinct took hold, and I curled up, my wings acting as a blanket covering my body and shielding my eyes from the light.
Panic surmounted anger, and my childlike fear took hold.
Silence regened.
…
“’Tis no time for games, child. We are in a foul mood.”
I refused to open my eyes. Doubt lingered on in the form of a heavy quiver in my stomach as I lay completely still, hoping beyond hope that this half-assed idea would work. That I was invisible to her all-seeing eyes.
“Art thou not listening? Heed our warning at once!”
I fought tooth and nail against the compulsion to flee, which grew stronger with each passing moment. Regardless, I was fucked either way if my plan crumbled; I had placed all of my chips into this bet.
“DANIEL! We will not ask again!” Luna thundered.
My heart traitorously beat louder as if it was calling out to Luna in surrender.
I ignored it. I swallowed the breath I was holding into my stomach and kept my stinging eyes shut. The pain was becoming too unbearable to ignore.
Clink-Clop
The sound of ironshod hooves on stone echoed through the ruins.
She can’t see me. She can’t see me. She can’t see me.
I repeated this mantra in my head like a broken record. Again and again. It wasn’t enough to ignore the pain or Luna’s close proximity, but it kept my sanity in check.
I felt her gaze sweep over me, but I kept my eyes squeezed shut.
She hasn’t seen me. She hasn’t seen me.
My stomach heaved. I felt nauseous.
Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop
I flinched, feeling the sound waves and vibrations from each hoofstep.
Clink-Clop Clink-Clop
“Our sister’s devilry cannot hide thee from our sight forever, child. Thou will be found.”
Her words hung in the air, punctuated by her metal shoes clicking against the floor as she slowly approached. It was impossible for her superior senses to not pick up the scent of my burnt flesh, and I could almost hear the gears in her head turn as she sniffed the air.
Buy time. I needed to buy a few more seconds, always a few more. I was knee-deep in debt that I would never be able to pay off—buying seconds so I could use them to buy a few more. The sound of grinding, squeaking gears filled my headspace as I tried to think of another way out of this mess.
But I couldn’t.
The cancerous heat spread to my chest, and my heart was on fire. I bit down on my tongue a second time that night, smothering down a scream as the pain flared up. Debilitating pressure forced a scratchy rattle out of my lungs, cleaving through the silence.
The air sizzled.
Through the haze of pain and terror, I felt something splashing against me but failing to bypass the shield. The scant milliseconds of confusion bled away into fear as an unseen force hoisted me up to my knees before pushing me onto the floor.
My vision was clouded by blue spots—spots I couldn’t rub out of my sight as my limbs refused to obey my commands. It wasn’t until I felt Luna’s magic permeate the air again that the strange, viscous substance was brushed away from my eyes.
I blinked, unwanted light filtering into my stinging eyes as my doubled vision corrected itself, and the terrifying presence of the lunar alicorn came into view.
Luna had changed.
That was the first unfiltered thought that sped through my addled mind beyond all else. Luna’s carefully crafted mask of civility had completely crumbled in all aspects, and it showed with her midnight-black fur accentuating her draconic eyes and devilish teeth. She was something straight out of a grim fairy tale, one that crept into children’s bedrooms in the dark of night to steal them away.
“Stay away!” I commanded.
Silence.
The storm was unnervingly quiet and did not rise to the occasion once more to smite the princess. Luna’s horn glowed, and the pressure on my body multiplied, forcing the air out of my lungs in a pained, elongated scream. I had no room to move my straining limbs, and I could feel the bones in my wings creak with each ounce of added pressure.
But Luna was heedless to my screaming and sobbing as she slowly approached, her ironshod hooves kicking up globs of blue paint around her all the while. As soon as our eyes met, I felt myself slipping away.
“Doth thou understand now? Thine agony is paltry compared to the suffering of those she had so callously abandoned in their time of need. We will never allow thee to follow in her hoofsteps, lest thee become cold-hearted and depraved like she was.”
I screamed, my burns aggravated from the cool touch of magic threads as they coiled around me, and I was forced off the paint-stained floor and into a kneeling position in front of Luna. A look of grim dissatisfaction was plastered upon her muzzle once more as she stared, eyeing me with a look a mother would give a petulant child.
The dissonance was undeniable now, and I could not reconcile the face of this monster compared to the character that Luna had painstakingly crafted to fool me. I broke eye contact, my head forcibly bowed from the buckling pressure.
“We have been haunted by our sister’s machinations for long enough. That we showed her any leniency despite her atrocities was a mistake.”
“S- sp-” I groaned out, hardly able to form a syllable, let alone a coherent sentence. The pressure immediately alleviated just enough to suck a desperate mouthful of air back into my lungs. But I couldn’t let sleeping dogs lie, and I couldn’t waste a single pained breath without antagonizing Luna. “Spare me the sanctimonious bullshit, princess, and take a look in a goddamn mirror before calling anyone else a monster.”
Luna scowled, her eyes trailing up and down my broken form before they softened. “Thine efforts are wasted upon her. She does not deserve thy Loyalty.”
There was power behind that word, power that I couldn’t possibly comprehend, even if I was suddenly cured of all my ailments. A power that only made the pain already wreaking havoc upon my body even worse.
Regardless, I was utterly spent, and being held captive with my own shields and Luna’s magic was the only thing preventing me from face-planting onto the paint-stained floor.
As I struggled to catch my breath, I noticed that Luna's breathing had become labored. I returned my tired gaze and discovered crocodile tears streaming down her face.
“We-”Luna let out a sob “-only wanted to nurture thee. To care for thee and love thee in a world untouched by hatred and where pain is just a horrible memory. But our sister will never allow us to live such an existence. Not when she is still blinded by her anger.”
“Y- you-” I wheezed through gritted teeth. “Y- You’re projecting.”
Luna shook her head before scraping one of her forehooves onto the floor. “We will not entertain her lies anymore. Like dying embers in a hearth, the evil within thy heart hath already begun to abate, and we will soon have thee back forevermore.”
“I-” I noisily breathed. There was a sharp and sour tang on my tastebuds, and I could feel bile rising to the back of my throat. I closed my eyes and breathed in and out until my congestion was manageable before speaking again. “Will never stop hating y- you, princess. I am not under some spell or being coerced-”
“Doth thou truly believe that? Canst thou say thy hatred is thine alone?”Luna paced around, circling me like a shark. “Or was there more to the storm, mayhaps?”
“I don’t- ”
“All of this blind anger, fevered on by innumerable sins. Thou felt it, didn’t thee? The shouts of rage in the dark? The innumerable voices crying out over the same injustice?”Luna interrupted, her nostrils flaring. She paused, turning away from me and staring upward. “She murdered them, child. Abandoned them in their time of need. And she dares to use them as weapons against us? To taint our child’s soul?”
Luna stomped her forehoof, causing the floor to spiderweb with cracks from the force of the impact as her emotions threatened to boil over. Instead of unleashing her anger upon me or having another temper tantrum, she remained still, with only the sound of her labored breathing breaking the tense silence.
I followed her unyielding gaze to the grey overcast above, which had gone completely silent.
“We never allowed ourselves to fall victim to our nature like our sister did. All of our subjects were precious to us, and we allowed ourselves to partake in the vices of mortal kind. We allowed ourselves to laugh, to cry, to…” Luna’s ears folded to the sides of her head as her voice trailed off. “Was it fear, sister? Were you so afraid to say goodbye?”
…
Luna’s magic flared once again as she cast another spell, causing a spire of cosmic energy to reach out toward the sky. Suddenly, the clouds shifted, and a light rain shower descended upon us.
She basked in it, allowing the rain to frazzle her mane and mat her fur wet as she tilted her head back and closed her eyes.
I was denied its gentle and calm touch as the droplets sizzled and burnt up against my shield's golden and blue hue. No, it was just another sick form of punishment by the princess—not only was she depriving me of my only proper defense against her, but I also was not allowed to alleviate the burns on my charred skin.
My wings grew restless as they tried to spread and flex against my prison, but I had no room. I couldn’t even bend my arms closer to my chest, let alone move them, and I was quickly running out of time to act. I swallowed the clumping saliva building up in my throat as I prepared to call for the storm’s wrath once more.
“Smite-”
“Tis’ far too late for that, child,” Luna somberly responded. “Their hatred for us and our failure is not unwarranted, but that anger is finite. No matter how much our sister wished, she could not use them to keep us trapped within the dream realm forever. Not when we saw through her ploy.”
“But she kept thee in the dark, didn’t she? Thou were nothing more than a pawn to be used and discarded,” Luna turned, her draconic eyes washing over me as she frowned. “A reckless last-ditch effort to eke out a pyrrhic victory, but she has overplayed her hoof.”
“Fuck you,” I replied.
“Petulant foal,” Luna chided, reverting to her stern, disappointed motherly voice. “We hold no ill will towards thee for falling prey to her machinations, but thou must learn from the error of thy ways, lest thee be doomed to repeat them.”
It didn’t take a genius to translate the word salad from Luna’s lexicon into proper English, and I knew exactly what she truly meant to say: I’m going to gaslight and torture you into compliance. Please do not resist.
“Does this mean you’re going to set me on fire again? I am a slow learner, after all.”
Luna flinched as if she was struck across the face. There was a split second where I could see her expression sour as if she was chewing on a lemon before it shifted into restrained contempt. She closed the distance between us and loomed over me but remained a few inches out of reach.
“Doth thou truly believe we enjoy seeing thee in pain? In making our flesh and blood suffer?” Luna’s voice boomed, all trace of her previous gentleness gone.
A rumble sounded off in the distance.
“You’re fucking delusional,” I continued with a scowl. Despite everything, my anger and contempt were enough to take my mind off the pain, if only briefly. “If you still think that kidnapping and brainwashing me somehow qualifies you to become my mother. ”
“We hath done no such thing!” Luna seethed. “Thou art-”
“And yet you still have the audacity to lie to my fucking face!” I cut her off from her verbal diarrhea, with both anger and acid reflux burning at my insides. “First, it was the ‘teleportation spell,’ and now you found me delirious in the woods, freezing to death? Which was it, Luna? Because after all this time and all these mind games, you never once bothered to tell me the truth!”
“BE SILENT-”
“Shut up!” I screamed. “You scrambled my brain like a fucking egg, and for what? So we could live your perfect little lie? News flash, Princess, but no matter how many memories you scoop out of my brain, I will never be your son. And as long as I still draw breath, I will never stop hating you, not after everything you’ve done to me.”
“WE SHALL TOLERATE NO FURTHER INSOLENCE FROM THEE!” Luna shrieked furiously, with small, wispy plumes of white smoke escaping her nostrils as she hyperventilated. The volume was loud enough to topple the already precarious hanging supports and loose chunks of rock on the outskirts of the platform into the seas below. Above, the clouds began to weep, turning the gentle rainfall into a torrential downpour.
I opened my mouth to speak but instantly felt nauseous as I was hoisted up into the air. Slowly, I was forcibly dragged toward the irate alicorn, my ears ringing like church bells all the while.
“ Again and again, we hath watched thee suffer unjustly—burdened by the knowledge of thy misfortune. We have nurtured thee, mended thy body, and cleansed thy spirit of this malaise again and again, only for thou to cast thy life aside in grief!”
Luna’s gaze narrowed, the black slits of her eyes tracking my every movement as she brought her muzzle inches away from my face.
“N ay, we could never tell thee the truth. History hath proven that thou are unfit to handle such burdens and that thou require our guidance, lest we are forced to bury yet another child . ”
“That isn’t your choice to make! It never was!” I cried out. It was nearly impossible to hear my own voice from the noise—both from Luna’s screaming and the constant deluge of raindrops pelting every surface.
Luna’s expression curdled like milk from my response. “ Because thou made the wrong choice every time, without fail. We-”
“But it was my choice,” I retorted. “Not Celestia’s. And up until now? You seemed adamant about casting the blame on her at every opportunity.”
“Because she led thee astray-”
“Did she? Was she the one that locked me up? Or violated my mind and tortured me?”
“She-”
“Protected me. From you,” I sneered. “She’s helped me more times in one night than you have in your entire life, and there are no terms and conditions behind her actions. She had no reason to save me beyond believing it was the right thing to do. Can you say the same?”
Luna growled, but I pressed on. “Of course you can’t. It’s impossible for you to love anything you can’t coerce or force into submission. And even if I can hardly remember a goddamn thing that’s happened before this nightmare … I remember how you made me feel. Your love was degrading, devaluing, and drove me away to the brink of utter insanity.
“Your love was selfish.”
Anger. Desperation. Hunger. I saw all of these emotions flash within Luna’s eyes as she appraised me like a hunk of flesh at a butcher shop. Her shift in demeanor sent shivers down my spine, but it also brought a sense of relief in a twisted way. It was harder to hate a monster when it acted like a person and wore a fake persona of kindness and understanding.
Something rumbled within Luna’s throat as she opened her mouth, and animalistic fear washed over me as I received a front-row seat to her dangerously sharp set of pearly whites.
“Everything we have done was for thine own good,” Luna hissed. “We made thee happy. We gave thee the tender love and care thou deserved, and we were a better parent to thee than thy whorish mother or bastard father ever was!”
“You bitch!” I could feel my muscles and veins straining against my skin, even in my burned chest and shoulder. “You have no fucking right-”
“Do we not? It is a miracle that they did not corrupt the good within thee due to their shameful acts and cowardice.” A powerful gust of wind swept across the platform, swiping at Luna’s starry and billowing mane like a cat with a ball of twine. “And yet, despite them being delighted with thy suffering and leeching off the fruits of thy labor, thou wish to return to them? To enable their hedonistic pleasures at the expense of thy well-being? Nay.”
Luna jabbed a forehoof into my chest. I couldn’t feel it, both due to the spell and the pain I was still suffering, but her touch disgusted me all the same. She disgusted me. Hate. Hate. Hate her. I hate her so much.
“It is thou who is ignorant of true, unconditional love.”
I was already balling the spit in my mouth before cursing the very existence of my prison. My grip on consciousness was fluctuating, with the flare-ups of pain preventing me from drifting off into blissful unawareness, but even that soon wasn’t enough.
Noticing my moment of weakness, Luna began to smile triumphantly. She bent her knees and lay out in front of me, and I felt her hot breath brush against my neck as she began to hum quietly.
Soothing. The sound rumbling from Luna’s throat was gentle, a balm against all of my afflictions, and I could feel the pain recede in short order as she continued her alien yet hauntingly familiar tune. Not a moment later, there was a tingling sensation on my scalp, as if someone was rubbing their fingers slowly through my hair.
A few hums later, she began her cradlesong.
“As the night falls and shadows creep And the moon begins to rise, I'll sing a song just for thee To close thy weary eyes.
The stars twinkle in the sky As the night breeze gently sighs. All is well, my little one, So let thy dreams take flight.
Lay thy head down on thy pillow As the night watches over thee. Know thou are loved and protected In this peaceful, dreamy hue.
So sleep tight, my darling, As the night wraps thee in its arms And wake to a new day tomorrow, Fresh and bright and full of charms.”
…
“Pleasant dreams, child.”
My eyes closed as I coughed.
…
Silence reigned.
…
A sudden, faint buzzing against my leg jolted me awake.
“What?” Luna replied confusedly, eyeing me with a furrowed brow. “What trickery is this?”
I ignored her, staring up at the star-speckled night sky in vain as it poked through the various holes within the cloud cover as if it was swiss cheese. It took me far too long to realize that it had stopped raining, and I began to panic at that thought.
“Child?” Luna’s face was uncomfortably close again as she stared at me, her facial expression tense. It was a far more grim expression, but the number of times I saw this familiar side of Luna before was unfathomable—it was the same disapproving, motherly gaze. The same one that Luna always used whenever she felt the need to discipline or correct me in some way.
The phone continued to ring incessantly as Luna’s unanswered demand loitered.
“Don’t you dare! Don’t you dare look at me like that!” The tightness in my chest was already being replaced by a sudden edgy, twitchy feeling as I flew off the handle. “You have no right to treat me like this or act like everything is okay! Not after everything you’ve done!”
“Child-”
“You have no right to judge me!” I screamed, with globs of spittle splashing against the film-like shield layered around my face like tin foil. “You have no right to judge anyone! You’re immortal! You have no idea what it’s like to be a lesser being, to not be all-powerful! You’ve had centuries, millennia to learn and grow, yet you presume to hold my family in contempt for not living up to your impossible standards?”
I hissed, refusing to blink as I stared into the slits of Luna’s eyes. “You can’t even live up to them yourself, you hypocritical bitch. ”
“They-”
“Never brought a kingdom to its knees and murdered all of its subjects,” I replied with ire. “For all their supposed sins you were referring to, they seem like utter saints compared to you.”
“WE WILL NOT BE BLAMED FOR OUR SISTER'S ACTIONS. IT WAS HER SINS, AND HER’S ALONE, THAT BROUGHT UTTER DAMNATION TO OUR PEOPLE.”
Luna violently dragged me from the floor, bringing me up to her chest as she glared at me with unhinged malice.
“And there you go again, blaming others for your shortcomings and fuckups. Can’t deal with the guilt, Princess?” I pressed, continuing to prod the evil goddess with a metaphorical stick. There was a sudden look of revulsion in her eyes. “Or is it something else? Jealousy of your sister, perhaps? No matter what, we always somehow loop back around to her, after all.”
A flash in the corner of my eye, up in the cloud cover. The smell of fresh, clean earth in my nostrils as everything became humid. The ceaseless faint buzzing against my thigh. This all happened in chorus as the next round of raindrops began to fall.
And for the briefest moment, I saw it—a resigned sort of disappointed sorrow on Luna’s face. It was gone as fast as it came, but knowing it was there…
“It hurts, doesn’t it? Living under your sister’s shadow, I mean.” I was scraping the bottom of the barrel for any ammunition to use against her, but she didn’t need to know that. She didn’t need to know how much I actually knew, which was fuck all. “No matter what you accomplished or achieved, you were always seen as second-rate.”
“Do thou think it wise to test our patience, child?”
“Are you saying that I’m wrong?” I pressed on. “She grew drunk on your subject's praises while you starved for any attention at all, and you hate her for that. You hate her because your subjects could see none of her flaws while all your efforts were scrutinized. That’s why you killed her, isn't it?”
“DECEIVER!”
The shield began to shrink.
Panic began to squeeze at my chest, but I could do nothing. I was completely immobilized, couldn’t breathe, and could feel my bones creaking from the sudden pressure. Looking at Luna in horror, I could see that her dilated eyes were completely glossed over.
She took a few ragged, irregular breaths as she hunched over, sobbing bitterly.
Then all hell broke loose.
With the sound of a hurricane, Luna unleashed a terrible wail of anguish, her horn bursting wildly with indigo magic as the deadly waves of energy were sent in all directions. Her tears mixed with the downpour of rain as she slammed a forehoof into the ground, and the stone platform trembled from Luna’s despair.
Looking up, I could see that the cloud cover had once more shrouded the starry night sky and its matron satellite as it began to rain death upon us. The lightning was almost constant, flashing across the sky in bright, jagged streaks. Each time it struck, the air was filled with a loud, ear-splitting crack, followed by a deep, rumbling thunder that shook the stone platform like an abusive mother to her newborn child.
It was at that point, when the last exhale of precious oxygen left my lungs, that a flash of searing white crashed into the thin gap between us. Sudden, primal relief washed over me as the claustrophobic squeeze of Luna’s magic halted, but it was too little too late—I was trading one method of execution for another.
A silent scream escaped my lips, followed by a desperate gasp for fresh air as I plummeted inside my magic coffin and into the depths below. Luna’s screaming was still ringing in my ears all the while, her voice everywhere and nowhere at the same time.
I slammed face-first into the inky black waves.
Author's Note
We're close to the finish line!
I am so sorry for how long this took, but these past two months have been... hectic , to say the least. For the people in the know, I am doing better, and I will finish this story before starting anything else, but I honestly have no idea how long this new chapter will take---there is a ton of ground to cover, and I feel like splitting anything up at this point will ruin the flow.
The chapter could easily be double or triple the size of this one, but I won't know until I sit down later and go through my notes.
In the mean time, I want to thank neither for another amazing art piece, and FrazyComs for this amazing art piece they've done for the story!
There was another gap in my memory. A before, and the immediate now. A raging storm, a roiling sea, a monster with slitted eyes. It didn’t matter that I knew it was a dream and that Luna’s devilry reached through the astral plane—the events were already slipping from my mind like a clump of sand through my fingers.
And because of that, I felt my entire recollection of events was suspect. My brain had been starving for oxygen, Luna’s magic burning the skin off my bones, and the whole world shrouded in darkness as I plummeted into the waters below.
Then I remembered it.
The fall and the rancid taste of pennies and gasoline. And I remembered again the dreadful terror of it filling my lungs, my throat, and the ceaseless, thundering ringing pounding in my ears and heart, the screams and pleas for help smothered in their cradles.
There had been no means of escape—my wings could not slice through the thick, syrupy membrane I was trapped within. I was encased entirely in this molasses, unable to do anything to stave off the cold nipping at my limbs while my chest burned.
Such a familiar and painful way to die. And there would be no divine intervention from Celestia to save me when I stopped breathing this time.
Fear bled into acceptance as my lungs had finally given up.
I had wanted to die with my humanity. It was the last wish of a dying man, unburdened by any sense of rationality, and it was the one I had grasped above all others. It was a wish I thought would never be granted, not with prayer or desperate feelings.
Until it was.
Terrible, terrible, wrong sensations. Faces. Places. Feelings. Faded pictures with washed-away colors and no context. They flooded into me alongside the liquid fire that burned my throat and lungs, and I was certain I’d suffer an aneurysm from the strain.
The threaded needle came next.
Even within the ceaseless dark, I could remember seeing it—a thick tendril, no different from any of the others I had the misfortune of seeing before. It slithered through the water like an eel, not even waiting for its prey to perish before it had its fill.
My wings reflexively twitched as it slowly and deliberately slithered into my forehead, piercing through the skin and causing my already ajar mouth to widen further in painful shock.
And then it pushed.
I gasped for air with a pained wheeze.
Coughing up my lungs in an asthmatic fit was no less uncommon of an event now than it had been before I stepped foot outside my gilded cage. Still, compared to previous events… this all paled in comparison to what I usually suffered.
But before I could ponder upon that train of thought, I blinked in a harsh, unexpected light.
Time froze. My body was already on autopilot as I leaned to the side, and with all the force it could muster, the firm plastic wheel I white-knuckled was wrenched sharply to the right. My organs jostled at the sudden weight transfer, and I felt as if my eardrums were going to rupture from the sudden horn blaring right toward me.
My head spun like a spinning top, the afterimage of the bright light lingering within my vision. This all happened in a microsecond, and it wasn’t until my left foot reflexively slammed onto something metallic that I came to a lurching stop.
Time resumed. A full gulp of air trailed down my lungs within the blink of an eye, followed by a confounding sense of disorientation. The foul stench of the ocean was gone, replaced by a plethora of familiar and unfamiliar scents. Dust, dirt, lingering smells from old carpet and upholstery, and even a hint of lemon.
Lukewarm air sputtered into my face, taking some of the edge away from the freezing chill that spread up from my extremities. But regardless of the cold and sharp pins and needles driving themselves through my fingertips, I refused to relinquish my iron grip on the steering wheel.
I breathed in deeply again. Once. Twice.
Despite the sudden rush of adrenaline, I was trapped in a perpetual state of shock, and none of my limbs obeyed me. I couldn’t even curl a single toe or blink as I stared out of the frosted window into a seemingly infinite expanse of white.
Where? Where-
The wind bellowed on the left side of the vehicle, shifting its path on the ever-expanding road, dusted thrice over with a firm blanket of snow. A quick thought of relief crossed my mind, patting myself on the back for fixing the issue that caused the driver-side window to be perpetually rolled down a quarter of the way before the storm hit.
“-shaping up to be one for the history books, folks. We haven’t seen a storm this severe since the Blizzard of ‘77!”
Instantly, I felt the need to jump out of my skin at the sound of the unfamiliar baritone voice trying to claw its way through a burst of static.
Rather than fall into another bout of anxiety-driven panic, however, determination subsumed all other sensations warring for dominance within my body. My right arm flexed, pulling tightly at a lever off my side, and the sound of dry leaves crunching underneath boots drowned out the drumming beat of my heart.
No, not leaves. Snow. Just like-
My thoughts returned to the throne room and the piles of endless snow while my body stubbornly remained on autopilot. Conflicting ideas and thoughts floated about in my headspace, all crying for attention like barking dogs. Chief among them, about how far gone I was—trapped in another dream within a nightmare, all while my body was undoubtedly freezing to the bone in Luna’s clutches.
There was no telling about what was happening. For all I knew, I was already on death's door, or perhaps even worse… Luna had woken up before I did, no worse for wear than before. For all intents and purposes, I couldn’t rule either of these scenarios out, and this terrified me.
And yet, there was no adverse reaction to this knowledge, inward or outward. The same air of collected, dogmatic narrowmindedness remained steadfast within me. It was as if I had taken a backseat in my mind and let something else take control.
Not a moment later, a second voice filled the uneasy silence.
“That’s right, John. We’re urging everyone to follow the travel ban guidelines and to stay indoors and off the roads. The snow is coming down so hard and fast that it’s impossible to see more than a few feet in front of you.”
The muscles in my body suddenly went rigid, and an air of uncertainty washed over it. A dry mouth, a suddenly sensitive stomach, and an annoying onset of heartburn soon followed, and the ghost of someone’s face flashed before my eyes. The distraction was enough to peel my mind away from the current situation. It wasn’t until I was jolted back into my seat that I noticed I was moving again, engine gears grinding and tires scraping at the layer of snow underneath.
Wait. Wait-
I stared, looking as far as my limited perception allowed.
Stitch. Stitch. The image of threads and needles weaving together in my mind, followed by a burst of clarity.
“Old fashioned” was the first thing that came to the forefront of my mind. Everything, from the deep burgundy interior and the millions of plastic buttons adorning the dashboard to the firm yet comfortable plastic of the steering wheel, felt aged. Worn in. A hand-me-down old enough to belong in a museum but reliable enough to go the distance and back.
Even the cramp just below the shoulders in my back was a well-known feeling. And despite its annoyance, I felt as if I had been reacquainted with an old friend.
Context continued to flood back to me in brief spurts. Places, people, events—blurry photos that had faded from age, but I still remember how they made me feel. And with that knowledge, I knew exactly why I was desperate enough to brave the cold.
“We’ve received numerous reports of accidents and pile-ups alongside Transit road and the surrounding areas. Please, if you must travel, take it slow and be extra cautious. The wind is causing whiteout conditions, and it’s easy to lose your way.”
I spared a single glance at the rearview mirror and the propped-up body in the backseat covered under a pile of blankets.
Mom.
My body leaned forward, staring intently at the road.
The skies were dark, and even with the car’s headlights, visibility was nearly zero as dense fog and heavy snowfall blanketed the road ahead. True to the warnings of the radio hosts, I could see the silhouettes of abandoned cars along the sides of the road, and I could feel myself swallowing down a lump in my throat.
The engine whined in protest at the prospect, but my foot pressed gently on the gas, goading the lumbering beast to continue its slow trek across the frozen tundra. Five. Fifteen. Twenty-five miles per hour. Snow slushed underneath the tires as the muffler huffed and puffed like an asthmatic.
“-find yourself stranded, stay in your car and call for help. Don’t try to walk in these conditions; the wind chill alone could be fatal.”
Stitch. Stitch.
One year before anti-lock brake systems became standard on the Honda Accord. Having all-season tires did little to help matters—they were designed for precisely what it says on the tin, and that meant compromises. They weren’t rated for anything beyond light snow, and this storm was too busy defying all expectations.
For this reason, I maintained my slow and steady pace, keeping my head on a swivel as I passed by the carcass of a silver Corolla. Thankfully, no one was inside, and this became a running theme with each car I swept passed.
Paradoxically, I knew I was traveling faster in this blizzard than during regular hours. It was another helpful boon to keep my spirits up, even as I weaved between a silver Mercedes and a sport-red Impala.
Another burst. Implicit memory told me that I had just passed the Transit Lanes bowling alley, and I would not argue against that little factoid, especially knowing that this memory was already set in sto-
VVVRRRRIIIIINNNNNGGGGGG!
My eyes remained glued to the road. Another dozen cars were scattered haphazardly on the road, and I slowed to a crawl to squeeze by. There was too much snow already on the ground to risk stopping, and I knew I’d get a heart attack if I tried to shovel any of it off when I inevitably got stuck.
But that didn’t stop the muffled noise and faint buzzing against my leg. It wasn’t until the fourth ring that I was able to drive in a straight line again, and it wasn’t until the fifth that I hastily fished the smartphone out of my pocket and answered.
“Sarah?” I switched on the phone’s speakers before slotting it in the flat divot in front of the air vent beside me. I spared a second glance at the rearview mirror, noticing small and subtle movements from underneath the mountain of blankets. They stopped as quickly as they started, and my mother was instantly lulled back into an exhausted sleep.
“Danny? How is she? How’s Mom? Where are you?”
I exchanged another glance with the pile of covers in my rearview mirror.
After hearing her dulcet voice, a lifetime’s worth of emotions gnawed to escape its bottled cage, but there was no outward reaction. No suddenly unfocused gaze from eyes prickling with tears. No slowed, languid movements. No cracking voice, desperately reaching out to make up for lost time.
By all accounts, I had seen her just a few hours prior, and within this memory, I had no reason to think otherwise.
“Power was cut to the whole street when I found her, but I got her out just before the worst of the storm rolled in.” My lackluster response did little to assuage her fears, and I could hear the floorboards underneath Sarah’s feet creak through the speakers as she paced around. “She’s sleeping it all off right now.”
Snow and sleet buffeted the windshield, which the wipers clawed and scraped at tooth and nail to clear from the glass. It was an uphill battle of attrition, one that my windshield was currently losing as General Winter’s forces slowly carved out more territory.
Sarah sighed, and an awkward pause filled the air before she found her voice again.
“Please tell me you’re almost home.”
“I had to take a detour. The 99 is utterly gridlocked with abandoned cars right now,” I said before sputtering into a pained wheeze. It was painful to even exist in this cold, and my asthma was doing little to help matters.
“Danny?”
“J-Just a bit of a-” I coughed into the steering wheel. “Flare-up. I’m cutting through Transit, and if I can squeeze through to Maple, I might be able to make it back before things get really ugly.”
“We both know that it isn’t just a flare-up.”
“And we both know that emergency services can’t do a damn thing right now.” My heart sank as I spotted a plow truck, of all things, directly off the side of the road. It was a goddamn punchline—the rescuers needing rescue. The driver's side door was ajar, and snow was already piling into the vacant seat, stuffing it like a thanksgiving turkey.
I shook my head.
“Don’t you die on me now. Don’t you fucking dare, you goddamn idiot!”
There was so much more I wanted to say, so much more I wanted to do. I wanted to be there for her and give something more than an unfulfilled promise. But this was nothing more than a scene in a movie, and the plot was already set in stone.
And in this scene, the actors knew there was no time for idle chat.
“We’ll see you soon, sis. I promise.” The phone clicked a moment later.
No sooner than I uttered my empty assurance, my skin became as pallid as the snow crunching under my tires. White death swirled into bone-chilling plumes of frost, blotting out everything in front of me from sight. Any chance of keeping my eyes on the road, let alone spotting the haphazardly scattered vehicles, was impossible.
In retrospect, I could not have foreseen a different outcome to my past self's situation. Prevention was the best cure and, in this instance, the only cure. But I had been forced to play this game. And with no winning moves in the cards, I was doomed to watch myself blunder over and over again.
Case in point, I was already pumping the brakes as I tried to catch glimpses of any shadows waiting to jump out at me within the whiteout. Twenty, fifteen. My car rumbled in disagreement as I slowly trudged through the thickening blanket of snow, but I had little choice.
Staying put was tantamount to suicide. Past me knew this, I knew this, and I wasn’t the only one who would suffer the consequences if I was buried under a few feet of snow. I had to keep moving, no matter what.
I spared one last glance at the rearview mirror and, noticing the steady rise and fall of my mother’s chest, pushed onward.
This went on for a few agonizingly long minutes.
I would jump at every mirage and feel my skin peeling off the plastic of the steering wheel whenever I bypassed a hardened clump of snow or chunk of debris. If I was lucky, I would catch a glimpse of a building on either side of the road and reorient myself accordingly. Through all of this, it became difficult to truly separate myself from my past, even with being imprisoned as a silent voice in this body, screaming into the void.
Another quarter mile drove, another inch of snow.
The blankets shuffled behind me, but I couldn’t afford a single glance, not even as the car bounced violently from a bellowing gust of wind crashing against the driver's side door. Rugged determination and Honda’s unique brand of witchcraft prevented the door from being torn off its hinges, but I couldn’t help but cringe at the metallic crunching noise that rang loudly in my ears.
There was no point in berating my past self for driving such a car in this environment. The car had survived worse, and Sarah’s Nissan Rogue was currently rotting in the auto repair shop—which had suffered the brunt of the storm along with the entirety of the south towns.
It was here when the house of cards tumbled.
The front tires locked up, and my chest instantly crushed my internal organs like an empty coke bottle from the sudden spike of stress. This brand of anxiety was something I was intimately familiar with. Still, it somehow felt even rawer than anything I had felt in recent memory… even including my close shaves with Luna.
The steering wheel slipped, scraping bits of skin off my frost-bitten hands as looming, ghastly apparitions revealed themselves from the frosty mist. Gone were the silhouettes of empty vehicles and restaurants, replaced by gnarled fingers and talons reaching to pluck me out of the car.
Jerking the steering wheel sharply to the left, I instantly felt a plummeting sensation in the pit of my stomach, and my car tilted downward into an uncontrollable death spiral.
Pure luck allowed me to drift just out of reach of one of these shadows, drinking in any details I could gleam within the microsecond allotted.
The unmistakable form of rough, unyielding bark, etched with deep grooves and knots, seared itself into my memory, and I was left with far more questions than answers. Answers that even my future knowledge couldn’t provide.
Trees? There were no trees on Transit road!
This was a fact. You could drive for nearly forty-five minutes and not spot a single piece of shrubbery on the sides of the road, let alone an entire copse of trees. My opinion on the matter changed nothing, and my car was screeching downhill through them like a spooked soldier in Vietnam.
My past self’s skills as a driver did not matter, nor did my car’s robustness and durability. I was no longer in control of my situation and could not protect my precious cargo, which was already starting to slip and slide off the backseat.
Snow-covered branches slapped against the windshield, a close call with a tree clipped my driver’s side mirror, and snow flew up from where my tires gouged ruts into the ground. I had no chance to orient myself, and pumping the brakes did little to slow my sudden downhill descent.
It only took a few moments before my vehicle collided directly with a tree.
The door slammed behind me so violently that my lithe body bolted upright into the air. My heart was already beating as fast as a hummingbird's wings, and it took all my willpower to not turn around as I raced down the hall.
This sudden transition in scenery was enough to spook my soul straight out of my body, but the accident still teetering on the forefront of my mind only made things worse. Once more, however, these feelings were kept separate from the terror gnawing at the meat suit I was unceremoniously stuffed into.
At least before, I had an intimate knowledge of my biological processes; I knew how my body worked, so there were no surprises. But here? In this new nightmare? Everything felt wrong. Small. My heart felt small, and so did my lungs. It was almost as if I was stuffed into clothes that were three sizes too small.
The hallway stretched outward and widened disproportionately while somehow also feeling cramped and stuffy. It was almost as if I had inadvertently stumbled across a hidden floor inside Luna’s madhouse, and she was intentionally screwing with my head again.
But context flooded my mind once more, and the drastic differences in proportions made far more sense—the oversized belt clutched into tiny hands, the small distance gained with each stride, the massive doors and fixtures fit for a house full of giants…
Childhood memories?
My gaze was transfixed on a figure peeking out of a door to my right, and a pair of deep blue eyes stared back. A tiny hand reached out from the darkness and beckoned, but I quickly shook my head.
Beyond the inherent uncomfortableness of my childhood body's awkward and restricted movement, I started to remember more about my past.
My father had always been an enigma to me, even after I went into adulthood. Perhaps there was a time when he wasn’t the disappointment we always viewed him as, but I wasn’t born to see it. I distinctly remember his cold indifference to our existence and how we were always walking on eggshells around him.
Until this point, the only time we ever heard him raise his voice was when we were cowering behind the paper-thin walls in our shared bedroom, our minds unable to comprehend the shouting and pained sobs that ensued like clockwork.
To this day, I still don’t understand what drove me to leave the safety of our little sanctuary… or what gave me the courage to snatch the belt right out of his hand mid-strike. But regardless of the reason, I knew this was the birthplace of my more… foolish tendencies.
“Where the fuck did you go? As soon as I find my belt, I swear to god-” an angry shout bounced off the walls from a few doors down, which caused my greasy palms to become even sweatier. The entrance to Sarah’s bedroom firmly closed shut and I beelined past it, hoping beyond hope that she would not become the target of his rage.
Somehow, my childhood self was able to ignore the shivers crawling up his spine, and he quickly dove past the mirage of white, floral wallpaper and into a door on the left.
It was almost enough to make me feel jealous, but I quickly buried that emotion as soon as it arrived.
The stench of cigarette smoke and cheap liquor wafted into my nostrils as I dove under the king-sized bed at the room's far end. Bottles of Jack Daniels and other assorted junk clattered next to me, but the panic rising in my chest overpowered any sense of disgust I had.
“Where the fuck is it, you little shit!” The carpeted floors did little to muffle the sound of his footfalls, which thundered like a herd of wild elephants.
“Stop! Please, don’t hurt him!” I could scarcely hear another shrill voice shout over the cacophony of noise stampeding through the hallway. The words of my mother fell upon deaf ears, and I squeezed my eyes shut, wishing that I could disappear as the door was nearly torn off its hinges.
“I know you’re in here!” he half-slurred his words in a fit of drunken rage. “There’s no place left for you to hide!’
“STOP!”
My stomach churned, and bile sat at the bottom of my throat as I heard him stomp into the room. Within a few powerful strides, I heard him stride towards the closet on my right, turning it inside out like a robber rifling through a victim's pockets.
I held my breath, afraid to move a single muscle as clothes, boxes, and other assorted items were casually tossed about the room. I could hear his raspy breathing become even more labored with each passing moment, and like the few times Luna cornered me somewhere, I could feel the temperature in the room rise to match his boiling-over anger.
…And then it stopped.
I exhaled, noticing that the room had suddenly turned into an icebox, or that someone had fiddled with the thermostat. My eyes darted around, looking through the small crack of light that shined in underneath the bed.
…
A gnarled, puckered hand wrapped around my left ankle.
I dug my fingernails into the grey-carpeted floor and screamed, but it was already too late. His rancid, intoxicating breath overpowered all other aromas in the room, and I could do nothing other than stare at the beast towering above me.
He turned me over, making me face him as he towered over me, and then I remembered more.
He was the same man in the photo—the black sheep in the otherwise happy family. Unlike the photo, however, there was no last-minute makeup or camera work to make him look remotely close to photogenic. His grey hair and beard were wild and unkempt like a savage beast, and cheap beer oozed out from the pores of his olive skin.
His blue eyes were glossed over as if he was entranced under a spell, and I could find nothing in them except for perpetual self-loathing and nihilism.
This hatred entranced me, and I was so ensorcelled by his hateful gaze that my past self did not see him wind up his arm, but I did. I was forced to watch grimly as his greasy palm sped toward my face with the force of an oncoming train. And I was forced to watch as he repeatedly struck a defenseless child, again and again.
Ring any bells, Daniel?
The only solace in this abuse was its honest nature; my father never once proclaimed to be doing any of his heinous actions out of love. He was a blunt instrument through and through.
Adrenaline dulled my senses, but I felt every strike connect with my frail body. There was nothing I could do, no defense my past self could raise against the savage beating—I was being mauled by a bear in human clothing. My past self’s face quickly became numb while I was consumed by hateful rage.
But then, over the rushing of blood in my ears, I dimly heard a second shout.
“-married the sad sack of shit you’ve become!”
“You’ll regret this, witch! Just wait until-”
The voices were so close, yet so far away at the same time.
“Get out! Get the fuck out!”
Their shouts continued to spear through the walls as I finally came to. My younger self didn’t understand, couldn’t understand what was happening. He had no frame of reference to know about the earthquake going off just down the hallway and into the kitchen. Rattling, shaking, thumping. The sound of glass shattering amidst the incoherent screaming.
It was sensory overload.
I crawled, the taste of pennies fresh on my lips as I finally found the strength to push myself onto my feet.
The tenseness of my muscles was still there, wound up and ready to spring like a jack in the box, but relief bled this tension out slowly from my pours and caking my skin with sweat. But with my short-lived burst of adrenaline ebbing away, I suddenly felt every strike and blow dealt to my younger self, and they appropriately collapsed to their knees just shy of the doorway.
But before my younger self could even cry out, I felt a hand brush against my shoulder. Instantly, I caught sight of a pair of deep blue eyes, and the small foil pouch of juice clutched tightly in her tiny hand.
…
The taste of fruit punch washing down my throat eased the pain.
The curtain closed, leaving me in pitch darkness.
I knew I was back here again, submerged beneath the blackened waves, waiting to die. But my body was completely numb. I could not feel the burning of my lungs and chest anymore, nor did I feel the need to breathe.
The only sensation I could feel was a migraine in my forehead—a symptom of having terabytes of data stuffed into my head.
This utter silence was banished in an instant as something else crashed beneath the waves. I could not see, but I could feel the vibrations even from here. The thrashing, the desperate last gasps for air silenced with a mouthful of water.
Just as soon as their struggle began, it ended, and I felt my addled mind drift away again into my subconsciousness-
I couldn’t remember the last time I saw the sun or felt the rays of its golden warmth touch my skin. Sure, I had memories and brief snapshots of the sun, but they were so far removed and distant that I couldn’t even begin to form a coherent timeline yet.
Having more and more information being dumped into my head with no way to parse through it all only made things worse, and I was waiting for the moment that I would wake up from these feverish dreams and go into a seizure.
These worries took a backseat as a cool late summer evening breeze sauntered toward the balcony I was standing on, gently brushing against clumps of matted fur on my body.
And I had no mouth to scream my lungs out.
Having been trapped within a child's body had taken some adjusting to, but there was enough frame of reference to understand how it worked. It was a human body—my human body, just slimmer and shorter.
Nothing could have prepared me for this. Nothing. This… everything felt so wrong! Out of place! This meat was utterly outside the context of anything I was able to understand.
There was no reason for me to experience a dream or memories from something so utterly alien, and I knew from the deepest pit of my soul that I was and always have been human. But despite all odds, I was in this creature's memories, unwittingly robbing it blind of them.
The one similarity, the single point of context that grounded me in this bizarre fantasy, was the pair of wings nestled at the sides of the creature’s back. They seemed similar enough, just like the ones I had been gifted in my fight with Luna, but that was of little comfort to me.
Everything else in this flesh prison was a facsimile of human anatomy.
A heavy, wrongly placed heart far too large pumped blood throughout a body far too big and robust. A pair of too-large lungs forced out air through a too-long throat, which escaped the creature’s misshapen mouth. Rather than act as a detriment, I knew these design features were necessary to maintain this form as context flooded through me once again.
Efficiency. That was the only word that made sense when describing the litany of differences between my mortal body and this. The human body was also efficient, but I was used to and understood its many flaws through a quarter century of trial and effort. This body seemed to have none of those.
It was a sobering realization, one born from half the blink of an eye of forced introspection combined with another cocktail of memetic knowledge crammed into my soul.
If I had control, I would have been sick to my stomach.
But I wasn’t, and I could not account for what happened next.
Power. It was the only word I could use to describe the massive pressure build-up on my forehead, which felt like it had its own personal dam powerful enough to hold back entire oceans. In my human body, this would have been called status epilepticus at best.
And yet, this sensation was normal—like it was always supposed to be there. Magic was a core fundamental to ponies, like breathing was to humans. To try and separate one from the other was tantamount to murder, and I was again reminded of just how utterly outclassed I was in this situation.
Jealousy. Fear. Hatred. I had all these emotions in spades, and it wasn’t just due to my constant run of bad luck. It was as if this body was on the same wavelength as me, and for a brief moment, I allowed myself to believe that I wasn’t completely helpless.
“Will we ever rid ourselves of this corruption? Or will our past haunt us with its shadow forevermore?” A very familiar voice tumbled out from the pony’s dried mouth, jolting me away from my deepening bout of psychosis.
Wait. Wait, wait-
I felt the pony’s lips purse as they stared wistfully out into the distance. They knew that their eyes, which could spot and name every single wildflower that dotted the hills just beyond the reach of the Everfree Forest, were not deceiving them, but that didn’t stop them from remembering what once was.
Or stop me from panicking as I became privy to whose body I was trapped in. This terrifying revelation, along with my newfound grasp of pony history, was suddenly swept aside by a sudden, skullfucking migraine.
I could only stare as familiar azure sparks arced from the tip of Luna’s horn, feeling the minute twitch of every muscle in the cartilage of the alien limb jutting from her forehead as she did so. The hairs on Luna’s coat stood on end as her veins expanded, allowing for even more efficient blood flow circulation.
My eyes followed Luna’s predatory gaze, which fell upon the fiery orb perched gently upon a bed of orange and pink clouds. Not even a microsecond later, tendrils awash in color not visible on the human spectrum shot outward from her horn like missiles, snaking across the sky before wrapping themselves around the sun like a lasso.
And then she began to pull.
I was no stranger to the freezing bite of her magic and how even the tiniest fraction of it was enough to make my skin raw and numb. With the amount of raw energy being dumped into a single spell, I was under no delusion that this vile beast could snuff out the very flame of the sun itself.
Is there no end to your witchcraft and madness, Luna?
Luna’s ears twitched.
I instantly silenced myself, not knowing if Luna had somehow heard me.
Part of me wanted nothing more than to scream as loudly as possible to distract Luna from her heinous actions, but it was just that, a small part. A minority. Every other instinct told me to keep silent, knowing that she could just as quickly torture and violate me, body or not. Memory or not.
So I bit my metaphorical tongue and watched as Luna continued to tug and pull against the celestial object as if it was a match of tug-of-war.
The outcome was already predetermined in my head, but I was still surprised to notice a presence inside the sun that was fighting back. For all of Luna’s power, her cold fury could not overcome its uncompromising defense, and inch by inch pulled away from her icy grasp.
This battle of wills continued for fifteen agonizing seconds, with the dam in Luna’s head widening ever further with each breath she drew. Dozens upon dozens of ethereal tendrils wrapped around the sun until it was utterly entombed in Luna’s magic, and I could feel every ounce of strain mounting on her skull as her head bent lower and lower.
But despite all this power at Luna’s disposal, the sun held steadfast. Unconquered. Unbroken.
I gazed up from the upper corners of Luna’s half-lidded eyes, watching with grim satisfaction as the laws of physics reasserted themselves and melted her icy chains away one by one. Trails of flame danced across the strings like the short fuses from a stick of dynamite, and it did not take long before searing pain lanced through Luna’s horn and into her skull.
I screamed.
There were no words to describe this pain, and even the grievous burns I had suffered in my battle with Luna paled in comparison to this. To call this “heat” would be an attempt to apply the human understanding of physics in a place where they truly had no reign. The only rule in this bizarre nightmare was simple to understand: only the strongest called the shots.
Stop! Please!
It was here when Luna’s destructive stubbornness came into play. Anyone else would have called it quits by now, but admitting defeat was a sign of weakness, a sign that Luna’s word was not gospel.
And to her, this was unacceptable.
Luna’s strategy did not change. She did not back off to reassess her opponent for weaknesses to exploit or to recharge her reserves. Brute force was the only language she truly understood, and anything that was not malleable enough to fit into whatever molds she created was discarded like alley trash.
Strings and flame. The unstoppable force versus the immovable object.
Make it stop! Make it STOP!
I did not know how long it took for Luna to assert her dominion over the sun, nor was I privy to knowing if Luna had heard my screams or internalized them as her soul wailing in agony. The only thing I knew was that the burden had lessened, and that opening was enough for me to slink back into the darkest recess of Luna’s mind.
With my very existence no longer in mortal peril, I felt my metaphorical jaw drop as I stared through Luna’s eyes once more.
Beyond the mess of strings still clinging to the sun, one stood out. A rope woven from golden starlight gently tugged the burning ball of plasma across the sky. Sinking lower and lower, the clouds became a deep, inky purpled, and the skyscape was awash with shades of pink and orange as it started its dip below the horizon. As the last light of the day faded, the world around Luna suddenly became bathed in the familiar glow of shimmering moonlight.
“Good evening, sister,” Luna sighed, staring at the horizon.
The sound of hooves clacking against the polished marble floors was hurried, and if Luna’s sudden grimace was any suggestion, it was out of the average norm for Celestia’s behavior.
This idea cemented itself in both of our minds as Celestia nuzzled the side of her cheek, allowing Luna to catch a glimpse of her sister. Her ornate, bejeweled necklace and golden slippers were nowhere to be found, alongside the otherworldly glow accompanying her multicolored mane.
“Luna,” Celestia’s pale magenta eyes were plastered with concern as she turned Luna’s head to face her with a forehoof. The irony was not lost upon me when she spoke out again with a concerned tone befitting a mother rather than a sibling. “We’ve discussed this already, haven’t we?”
“We know, Tia. It’s just…” Luna fell back on her haunches and stared holes into the floor, and I mentally prepared myself for the plunge that would inevitably ensue. A few seconds of awkward silence followed, and Luna subconsciously curled into herself, much like a child caught red-handed stealing from the cookie jar.
“It has only been three weeks, Luna,” An alabaster wing draped itself over Luna, which caused her to sigh, but left me with a sense of relief. “You know that it will take time to heal.”
Luna said nothing, her eyes trailing off into the horizon as something hollowed out the inside of her chest. I was far too familiar with the fatigue that plagued her, and I hated that. I hated that there was something that I could relate to with this monster, no matter how insignificant it was.
It was a longing for the past, things that would not and could never exist again. This is the feeling Luna felt as she stared out at the many towns and villages that had seemingly sprouted up from the muck rather than built up over centuries.
It was a feeling reflected upon the dimly lit stars glimmering overhead.
“But when will that time come, sister? For too long have we felt weak and weary. Our strength is not what it once was, and we fear it may never return.”
“You know that’s not true,” Celestia wrapped her forehoof around Luna and dragged us closer until Luna’s head was nestled beneath her neck. Her hot breath brushed against the hair between her ears, but she could not drag out the fit of giggles that always ensued from her teasing. “The Elements did not seal away your magic permanently before-”
“We had over a thousand years to recover, sister. And yet, even after our escape, we have been sapped of our strength. ‘Tis one thing to recover from the trauma of the ordeal, but it seems as if the second time the Elements were used upon us opened a wound that did not have time to close.”
Celestia hummed quietly, following Luna’s eyes as the breeze lapping at their fur coats chilled.
“...Are you sure that the nightmare was purged so quickly because you were weakened? Or was it perhaps the bond of Twilight’s friendship more powerful than we anticipated?”
“We are not sure,” Luna sighed. “Thy student has much potential, and the prowess she has shown thus far mayhaps be merely the surface.”
“Lulu, they haven’t crippled you. The Elements of Harmony’s justice is blind, not heartless.”
Luna’s eyes grew distant and wistful as they began to sting. “How can thou say that in good faith, sister? Thou hast tended to my tapestry in my absence for a thousand years, have thee not? Surely, thou hast noticed the stars fading?”
They both looked upward.
Being cramped within the castle's halls for so long had ruined my perspective on many things, including the night sky. The stars above still glittered like polished gems, and I honestly did not see the issue that had Luna all wound up.
To a starving man, however, any meal would look like a feast.
“They have grown distant from us, sister. Our moon and stars refuse our call.”
Good.
It was a reflex, but I couldn’t deny saying it aloud didn’t give me some schadenfreude as Luna’s ears pasted themselves to the sides of her head. The aching of her heart only made things all the sweeter.
“Luna, the sun-” Celestia squeezed tightly as she tried to reassure her.
“-Is a star,” Luna wriggled like a worm until she escaped Celestia’s grasp.“‘Tis only distance and thy bond to it that makes it unique among its kin. But even they are slipping beyond our reach if they have not faded from existence entirely.”
Celestia remained silent, her squinted gaze leveled at Luna as she leaned forward.
“Tia, what has happened during our absence? What has happened to our night? Why hast thou not…”
“I’m sorry,” Celestia apologized morosely, and I wanted nothing more than to hug the poor woman.
“The fault lies with me and me alone,” Luna turned away, surprising me. “Thou could not have possibly maintained our tapestry and performed thy duties of statehood alone. And we cannot fault our subjects for improving their lot in life either… but we wish somepony would have noticed our plight.”
Admitting fault for your mistakes, Luna? That’s a first.
Luna lethargically ambled towards the railing and peered over.
Seeing any signs of life was just as much of a treat as seeing the sun and the stars before it. Even if this was all just a momentary glimpse into the past, I was captivated . I wanted, no, needed to know everything about this culture and its history.
Everything, from the mix of towns with thatched cottages to sprawling cities that dotted the horizon, scratched an itch I didn’t know I had until I suddenly remembered that I was a city dweller. The endless seas of lights stretching as far as the eye could see were commonplace in New York City, and I wanted nothing more than to gawk and traipse around these lookalikes like a clueless tourist.
What was the story of Canterlot? Why was it built upon the side of this mountaintop? What of the other sprawling cities out in the distance? Or the massive forest that seemed to slice the entire country in half?
So many questions and so little time.
Luna was in a completely different headspace, however.
“We had always wished for our little ponies to appreciate our night. But this? We never thought about the consequences of such, and yet we should not be surprised that they would pollute the delicate serenity of our night with these flameless lanterns.” Luna’s inner Luddite clawed for freedom from her maw, tarnishing the awe-inspiring image I witnessed with her unwanted opinions.
Celestia was already at her side again. Draping her forelegs over the railing, she gazed upon her kingdom with sullenness instead of deserved pride. “I will begin drafting a law in the morning and take whatever measures necessary to undo the damage we have already caused.”
“It will not matter. Even after a thousand years, nopony loves the night, and everypony fears us. This truth has remained constant throughout the annals of history, and thy decrees and proclamations will not change this.”
Celestia pursed her lips.
“I could have,” Celestia finally said, unable to look Luna in the eye. “My word is law to our little ponies, and within a few decades, I’m certain I could have eventually swayed them—make them think of you as something other than a monster.”
“Sister, thou do not-” Luna’s limbs were anchors, and she was rooted to her spot, unable to move a muscle.
“But I do! I allowed this hatred to fester for too long because I was too weak to stop it. Please,” Celestia pleaded. “You do not need to suffer this burden alone, Luna. Don’t push me away.”
Luna bowed her head and closed her eyes. She was beginning to turn inward, withdrawing from the conversation and all outside stimuli in general. Were it not for the wings glued to her back, I could have seen how this outcome would play out.
And while I wasn’t deluded into believing that Luna wouldn’t survive a few hundred feet drop, I was tired of her morose bullshit and how it dragged down everyone with her. I didn’t need to remind myself about what kind of person she truly was, and I wasn’t about to give her any sympathy just because of a tragic backstory.
But I didn’t want her to do something that would fill Celestia with regret. Not when she was the only person in recent memory to show me any true form of kindness.
Let her help.
Luna remained silent, her wings twitching with agitation as they rubbed against her back.
Let. Her. Help.
“Luna.”
Luna opened her eyes.
Celestia’s face was plastered with fear, and the white fur on her cheeks somehow looked pale as she stared intently through Luna. And for a brief moment, I could swear that I saw the most subtle of eye movements… as if she was not staring at her sister but at me .
But just as quickly as it happened, it stopped. Celestia’s magenta eyes were already locked onto Luna’s again, glittering from a sudden spark of realization.
“You think I’m trying to replace you, Luna?”
“Trying?” Luna shook her head. “Thou already hast. Equestria has prospered for a thousand years without our presence, and it can live on for thousands more with or without. And we cannot help but resent thee for this, even if the nightmare no longer flows through our veins.”
Celestia flinched as if she was struck across the cheek. “Do not say such dreadful things! I never tried to replace you! I could never replace you!”
“But thou already have, and we cannot blame thee for this, either. Our jealousy and arrogance fed the nightmare, and our just punishment ripped us away from everything we cherished,” Luna gestured toward the horizon with a hoof. “Our first home has been abandoned, left to rot deep within the Everfree. The ponies we’ve cherished are no more, lost in the pages of history as hoofnotes at best. Our-”
Luna’s empty chest began to ache.
This distraction was enough to prevent her from noticing the subtle shift in Celestia’s attitude. I could see it in her body language—how she shifted backward to widen the gap with Luna, how her tail, wings, and ears twitched with longing and regret, and how there was a spark of conflict in her pained grimace.
“Our relationships are gone. There is nopony here that we share a connection with apart from thee, sister, and even this bond hath weakened. Formalities are all we have left, with not even the shallowest of bonds to fill the void in our soul,” Luna continued. Her longing gaze became fixed on Celestia, but she could not unmoor herself; her anchors weighed too heavy.
Celestia breathed in silently and squeezed her eyes shut.
“Do you remember, Luna, back before we burdened ourselves with these crowns?” Moonlight spilled upon Celestia as she tilted her head toward the stars. A warm smile graced her lips, accompanied by the prickle of tears hanging at the corners of her eyes.
“We do,” Luna reaffirmed, her heart squeezing itself like someone would wring the water out of a towel. “We remember our childish games back when we had not a care in the world. We were inseparable then, two young sisters playing pretend in the ruins of an old kingdom.”
“Every day always felt like some grand adventure, no matter how insignificant! Abandoned shops and houses used to be fortified castles filled with treasure!”
“And how thou always jumped at thy shadow, sister!” Luna softly chuckled, momentarily forgetting her sorrow as she wiped her tears with a hoof. “Even when thou were insisting on braving these ‘ castles’ for plunder!”
Celestia playfully held out her tongue, undercutting the congested sound of her nasal breaths. Luna allowed herself to reminisce, and I allowed myself to understand.
Flashes of memory. Old tableware, dusty tomes, grimy and aged golden coins. Nothing had been left to waste, and I understood enough that these were more than just childish antics—money made the world go round.
And for them, money had always been tight. Hunger had always been just a single missed meal away. Peace and happiness had been in even shorter supply, but they always made it work. Childhood’s spark had kept their bonds stronger than the whims of the eldritch god of disharmony that plagued their lands.
“Do you remember that book, Luna?”
They had found many books: diaries of shopowners with torn pages, dated history books with faded text, and colorful storybooks of brave knights and greedy pirates. They all had a place in her heart, no matter how small.
But Luna instantly knew she wasn’t referring to any of those. There was only one tome that fit that description, despite its vagueness, and her eidetic memory wouldn’t allow her to forget the first gift Celestia had ever given her.
“The Celestial Realms ,” Luna gently whispered, a phantom smell of earth and mustiness entering Luna’s nasal cavity.
The ravages of time had reduced it to tatters, but that didn’t stop her from remembering the heavy, azure cloth-bound book or how she eagerly undid the brass clamps holding it shut like a child tearing open a Christmas present.
Its vivid hoof-drawn illustrations and diagrams enthralled her young mind, and its beautiful and flowing calligraphy became the basis from which her own reading and writing skills developed. Despite not seeing it for centuries, she could still recite every single passage in order without missing a single syllable.
“Thou helped us understand,” Luna’s wings twitched as she shivered. “And nurtured our love for the stars. We…”
You never deserved it.
It was petty. Cruel, even. But I didn’t care. I already knew how this story ended, and my opinion of Luna was already set in stone.
Luna gulped, the smile vanishing from her lips. “We are sorry, sister, for forsaking our bond over jealousy and wounding thee and everypony who cherished us so deeply. Our punishment was just, but we have not yet paid the toll for our heinous crimes.”
“Luna!”
“W-We will take o-our leave,“ Luna’s voice began to crack as she turned to sulk away, which still garnered no sympathy from me.
“He was happy.”
Luna stopped in her tracks.
“...What?”
“I made sure of it,” Celestia stood resolute, and the gleam in her sparkling mane returned. “No angry mobs or upstart nobles ever darkened his doorstep, and he lived a fulfilling and fruitful live without worries or regrets.”
“Sister?” Luna faltered. I could feel the suddenly damp fur on her cheeks clumping together from unbidden tears.
“Are you surprised? Or did you truly think I would take my frustrations and anger at your betrayal out on a defenseless foal?”
“No, Tia,” Luna protested with a strained voice. “We never thought-”
“It was my own failing for not telling you sooner. And truthfully, I was afraid of ever bringing up old wounds like this. I feared you would resent me for it, and I acted upon my cowardice instead of being there for you again. All just to spare my emotions.”
Celestia strode with renewed vigor past Luna and into her sister’s chambers. No candlelight illuminated the room, but the patterns of stars and constellations painted on the ceiling glistened and twinkled as the moonlight from outside spilled into it.
“This was his work, not mine,” Celestia continued. “A labor of love for the mother he never knew and would never meet. But he shared your passion for the night, and that love passed down his lineage for generations.”
Luna remembered again. Her isolated prison. Her chains. Of how the stars twinkled in the forever night sky just out of reach. She couldn’t breathe. She was always numb. Always cold. But within all of this, she could never tear her eyes away from the orb of green and blue floating millions of miles away.
And for the first 86 years of her sentence, she couldn’t help but stare unblinkingly at a small patch of that green. Watching, waiting, until she felt a piece of herself shrivel up and die with a whimper.
Anguish flooded her, gnawing at her chest and tearing at her heartstrings. “After a millennium of bitterness, we had let go of our delusions of having our child returned to us, and we wish to start anew, to begin a new chapter of our life again… but we are afraid, sister.”
Luna stared at the starry fresco above, and I couldn’t deny the beauty that was beheld within each painstakingly painted star. Serpents, rams, owls, each constellation was utterly unique in its own right, but I longed to catch glimpses of familiar ones—Orion, The Big Dipper, Gemini.
This yearning brought forth another question I was uncomfortable answering: Had I arrived in this world during its prime, would I have allowed myself the chance to start anew? Or would I still be as embittered as I am now?
I thankfully never gave myself an answer, as Luna continued. “We are afraid that we have buried the bright and cheerful soul of our past on the moon, and what is left is nothing more than a hollow shell. How could we possibly thrive in this new world when our very foundation is crumbling?”
“Then let me help you, sister!” Celestia cried out. “We will make the moon and stars shine again!”
Luna turned her solemn gaze back to Celestia, whose serene mask had shattered into bite-sized pieces. “We will not deny thy help, but this is a battle we must win with our own power, if for no one’s sake but ours. Our faded and dulled tapestry is a mirror of our soul, even as twisted and barren as it is.”
A spike of adrenaline accompanied the image that came bundled with it—snow-white fur as pale as the moon and tiny azure eyes that gleamed with innocence. Luna clenched her jaw, her muscles turning rigid and stiff.
“And for his sake and for those we have lost, we will not rest until our work is done.”
I was already freezing when my eyes blinked open.
Confusion rapidly mixed with fear as the pungent smell of gasoline wafted into my nostrils, and I began to thrash awkwardly in place. My seatbelt tugged, forcing me painfully back into the seat and crushing my chest, which was already feeling tight from the sudden spike of adrenaline and stress. It was a struggle to breathe in the cold, let alone regain any semblance of sanity.
It took an agonizingly long amount of time to thumb over the seatbelt release and even longer to catch my breath, which escaped my mouth in clouds of white, wispy vapor. The heat vents had long since sputtered their last breaths, and my only source of warmth was the heavy black jacket and grey pants clinging to my rapidly freezing skin.
The first saving grace was that I knew I was in my own body again, with sensations and feelings that I could instinctively relate to upon a deeper and, most importantly, human level. Hands, feet, it didn’t matter how numb they felt or how it seemed like the winter chill was stinging them with the force of ten-thousand needles—I would choose this torture over being stuck within Luna’s body every time without fail.
Pure luck was the second. Cars didn’t reliably have airbags until 1990, and my Honda was just a year shy. It took me a moment to even process that I had witnessed my life flash before my eyes just a few minutes ago, only to be interrupted by other memories. Still foggy in the head, I relinquished my left hand's grip on the steering wheel and gazed forward.
Snow and sleet slithered through the cracks in the windshield, which dusted the dashboard and steering wheel in white. Still bleary from my drowsiness, my eyes tried to glean the source of the smoke and fire that clawed at my throat.
My right hand reluctantly brushed against the glass, and I immediately felt my eyes sting. The front bumper and hood had been completely crushed; both headlights were shattered, the front tires had exploded, and black plumes of smoke billowed from the exposed and broken engine block.
Despite being only a memory, it was still a sucker punch to the gut. My past self agonized over the price tag of such an accident—the insurance company would have a field day raking him over the coals for this. Knowing future events, I knew that greedy insurance agents were the lesser of two evils and that even a chop shop would have been a more noble end for the old girl than rotting in this godforsaken forest.
Goodbye, old friend.
I drew in a long breath, catching a puff of freezing chill from the broken windscreen that pierced my lungs. It was a similar pain to the one I experienced under the waves—searing pain in my chest, yet stinging and biting cold followed by a freezing, unrelenting gnawing. And just like drowning in that ocean, a sense of drowsiness and lethargy began to rear its ugly head again.
It wasn’t until I glanced over at my cracked rearview mirror that my eyes widened with realization. The world spun instantly; shades of mahogany and dark white clouded my vision as I forced the stiff muscles in my neck to twist.
The taste of copper stained my lips as I bit down on my tongue.
The backseat was empty.
Author's Note
I am so sorry for the long wait. I will be going on a trip this Tuesday and cannot finish all three parts and the epilogue by then. Still, hopefully, this will keep you all satisfied until I finish and edit the other parts (In total, all parts included for chapter 9 will more likely than not end up being 30k, including this 10k chapter.)
We're so close to the end, and I hope I can conclude this on a strong note!
Days had passed. Weeks. Or perhaps only a few hours—time was still a blur, even without her looming presence. Apart from the gradual healing of my frostbitten skin, I had no clear way to gauge its passage.
Even so, my mind could not be at rest, despite everything. Should I not have felt elated? Joyful? Relieved? I was free. Free to choose for myself for the first time in… forever.
I had no reason to feel afraid anymore, no reason to jump at every shadow or subtle change in the atmosphere. I had no reason to hide or to run. No reason to feel the hairs on my neck stand at attention like well-trained soldiers.
Shouldn’t I feel any happiness at all?
This question ate away at me as I trudged through the winding halls of this dead castle, despite already knowing the answer.
Luna’s death didn’t provide me with a happy ever after. The curtains didn’t come to a close after my hard-fought victory. Luna, Celestia… I was alone. Alone with nothing but my own thoughts while feasting off the bones of a long-dead civilization. I was no longer Luna’s prisoner, but I was still a prisoner to the storm and my human limitations.
And I was still prone to anxiety, nervousness, and unease. Her death didn’t solve those issues, and I doubted that diving into this newfound fixation would only make things worse… but I had to know.
Luna had her secrets, and I was eager to unravel them all. No matter the cost.
I couldn’t help but feel goosebumps as I passed the janitor’s closet.
The ink stains looked like dried blood at a grizzly crime scene, causing my heart to race unconsciously with revulsion and fear. I knew there was no more reason to feel afraid and that no more monsters were lurking in the dark, but I couldn’t help it. Those past events were still seared into my mind, and I doubted I would ever forget them, no matter how much I reassured myself.
Stopping, I turned on the balls of my feet, staring back the way I came. Waiting. Waiting for something to rush forth from the darkness, or a bone-chilling wind to bound through the hall after me.
But nothing changed.
In.
Out.
Inhale.
Exhale.
Nothing, subtle or blatant, chased after me.
No monsters. No shadows. Only a lingering, foul odor courtesy of the inky stains that bled into the floors and carpeting.
Luna was still gone.
I turned, stepping past a discarded mop and disappearing into the maze of winding halls.
SLAM
SLAM
I swung. Again. And again.
SLAM
The pilfered steel mace’s weight was unwieldy in my grip, but it was the only thing strong enough to batter down the false wall in Luna’s room.
SLAM
My bones rattled from the force of each blow, and my muscles strained with each swing.
Even with salty sweat pouring down my forehead and stinging my eyes, I found a rhythm to the deafening clangs that filled the silence. It was enough of a distraction to make me forget—to avoid thinking about anything beyond what was behind this damned wall.
SLAM
My breath came in ragged gasps as I continued to hammer away, but I couldn’t stop. The wall had to give, had to break beneath my unwavering determination. It was only when my hands began to throb with pain that I finally stopped, my asthmatic chest heaving with exertion, and I stared with disappointment at the cracked and battered wall before me.
A sterile, heated current blew through the cracks, taunting my lack of meaningful progress as I sat down to catch my breath.
The wall was a mess of cracks and fissures, spiderwebbing out from the point of impact like veins. Chunks of blue stone were dislodged from the surface, leaving ragged holes that revealed yet more rough stonework beneath. Of the few cracks that punctured beyond the second layer, I couldn’t see anything past the oppressive darkness that remained untouched for uncountable days.
There weren’t any spells halting my progress, or if there were, the magic had seemingly died with Luna. No, this was a mundane problem.
And it only needed a mundane solution.
Food. Demolition. Rest.
My efforts had bled into an endless cycle, and I had already given up on counting the days. Beyond the foodstuffs I had gathered from the kitchen, there was little I could do to track time apart from being forced to restock or determining how much the evergrowing pile of dust and debris littered the floor below the wall.
I hardly thought of anything beyond the swings of my mace and the reverberating echoes that broke the stillness that pervaded the castle. And perhaps that was a good thing. I didn’t know what was on the other side or if I would run into something worse than disappointment.
But I wasn’t willing to dwell upon that. Not now. And hopefully, not ever.
Bringing up my hand, I brought my mace crashing down onto the false wall, shattering another small layer of stone.
SLAM
SLAM
I swung. Again. And again.
SLAM
My steel mace felt like a natural extension of my arm, perfectly balanced and responsive to my every swing, like a conductor’s baton in the hands of a skilled musician.
SLAM
The stone wall rattled from the force of each blow, with chunks of debris and dust raining down upon me as I continued to pound away. My heart raced with anticipation and anxiety as I felt it give way, piece by piece. Strike by strike.
What secrets did she seal away here? What skeletons did she keep in her closet? Questions bounced about in my skull like overactive children on a trampoline as the spiderwebbed fissure widened.
SLAM
SLAM
CRASH
Bringing a free hand to my face, I coughed. Dust and debris coalesced around me like a twister, obscuring my vision as I hacked my lungs out. I thankfully had the foresight to use towels and bedsheets as a makeshift mask, preventing the worst of it from getting into my lungs, but they still protested all the same.
…
My mace slipped from my fingers, clattering to the floor loudly as I stared into the abyss.
The gaping hole was wide enough for three people my size, but I inexplicably had cold feet at the mere sight of it. I could not smell the stench of death emanating from it, nor any other putrid odors… but my instinct screamed at me to stop.
Someone—multiple people died here. I could feel this truth gnawing at my gut, and it was as persuasive now as the many times it told me not to trust anything she said.
This wasn’t some hidden treasure trove or archive of forbidden magics.
But then what? All of this effort, just to waste it all at the finish line? She can’t hurt me or anyone else ever again.
Scooping up my mace, I held it close to my chest as I waded through the rubble, entering the widened maw with trepidation.
Soon, everything became engulfed in shadow. I couldn’t see my arms or feel any walls flanking my sides, and I felt like I was walking in thin air. My stomach churned with each step as it begged me to turn back, but I was afraid to look anywhere but forward, let alone back the way I came.
The musty and stale smells of Luna’s bed chambers soon evaporated as I continued forward, replaced by complete stillness. There was no discernable scent to it, almost as if the air had been scrubbed clean with antiseptics, and my mind immediately raced to conclusions.
There are only a few reasons why Luna would keep a hidden chamber like this sterile. And none of them are good.
The anxiety felt like a knot in my chest, twisting and pulling with each breath. There was no turning back now. No-
I blinked. Blindingly bright purple light assaulted my eyes, and my mace nearly fell loose from my hands as my sight adjusted. A large brazier stood in the center of the room, burning with purple flames, which cast an eerie light across the many shelves, side rooms, and tables that huddled together claustrophobically.
Jars with strange, colorful liquids littered the room. Endless rows of leather-bound tomes and scrolls. Runic symbols carved into stone tablets that oozed with power. Ore and metal blocks painted in every color of the rainbow. Diamonds, rubies, sapphires, and emeralds, all gleaming like stars in a nighttime sky.
Almost every square inch was jam-packed with various dangerous-looking magical artifacts, among other strange phenomena that I couldn’t begin to comprehend.
This is an honest-to-god evil laboratory! What the hell does she do in here with all of this shit?
It was all organized chaos, with the few maze-like passageways between everything barely wide enough for someone my size to scrape by. But all in all, I couldn’t fault someone like Luna for being a hoarder—knowledge was power, and she had been the big cheese for a reason.
I scoured the room, my eyes lingering on each object with fleeting interest until my gaze fell upon it—the one collection that stirred a deep and painful longing within me.
Carefully, I wedged past a row of potions, making sure not to accidentally come in contact with anything potentially dangerous. Being on edge from everything didn’t help, and I’d often catch sight of the shadows around me dancing and skittering, making my tortured imagination run wild.
She’s gone. She can’t hurt me anymore. Luna. Is. Dead.
I repeated the last phrase like a mantra, allowing me to keep my paranoia at bay as I threaded the magic needle one step at a time. And then, finally, after what seemed like ages, I reached the far side of the room.
My old iPhone was front and center upon the sturdy, black stone table nestled in the corner, seemingly spared from the ravages of time. I wanted nothing more than to reach out and smash the glass curious that imprisoned it, but I refrained from bludgeoning it with my mace.
I didn’t know what sort of protections Luna had cast upon it or any other of the assorted mementos of my past that were present. Jumper cables. An old flashlight. A white cassette tape. Christ, she even had my museum piece’s owner’s manual, vehicle registration documents, and the goddam spare tire .
How? My car should have been an empty metal husk by the time she found it. How did…
I blinked, catching sight of the journal from Luna’s memory neatly placed toward the right side. Black cover, blue swirling stars. The spiral notebook had been yet another source of Luna’s guilt, but I had no context as to why.
Carefully setting my mace aside, I began to gently flip through the pages. Each turn created a soft rustling sound that broke the eerie silence, and each moment I lingered over these faded lines, I began to feel overcome with disappointment.
Like many of its breed, the notes and wisdom held within were etched in unreadable chicken scratch. Not even being inside Luna’s memories had made a difference, it seemed, and I doubted I’d ever be able to decipher her language within, even with all the time in the world.
And soon enough, I had leafed through the entire thing, idly noticing the final page had been torn out as my fingers drummed on the back cover.
Maybe I’m overthinking things? I was able to get in here after all.
Aching desire swelled up within me as I mulled over my options.
A stockpile of forgotten memories was within arms reach, but there were far too many unknowns. Too many things that could go wrong. What if there was a failsafe? A trap? Luna would have undoubtedly made countermeasures to prevent theft, and any thief foolish enough to try would have come prepared with spells and tools of their own.
This also didn’t account for what other enchantments were running in the background here. Would my belongings turn to dust in my fingers if I removed them from their containment? Or would there be some other unseen side effect of meddling with powers I did not understand?
Does it really matter? There’s no one left. Nothing can survive outside these walls, and the stocks in the kitchens will run out eventually.
…
“Nothing ventured,” I breathed. Taking a few seconds to center myself, I slowly reached out until my fingers brushed against the glass.
To my surprise, I didn’t spontaneously combust upon touching it, nor did Luna pop out of the shadows to smother me in her embrace. And as my skin brushed against the curio’s smooth glass, I scrounged up enough courage to lift the glass casing.
And to my relief, neither of my imagined worst-case scenarios occurred.
With trembling hands, I freed the ancient relic from its time capsule and gingerly pressed the power button.
The familiar glow of my phone’s screen brought forth a flood of emotions, and I couldn’t help but stare wistfully at the lock screen. There was a haunting beauty to the thick mist that clung to the air and the veil of clouds that shrouded the city streets. And I couldn’t help but feel enthralled by the glow of streetlights and headlights that diffused through the fog and the conga line of traffic and skyscrapers forever frozen in time.
But there was always a catch, always a setback.
I almost hadn’t noticed it camouflaged in front of a white building in the far right corner of the screen—a small white bar, over three-quarters empty.
I swiped upward.
Time seemed to stand still as I delved deep into this digital tapestry. The pulse of nostalgia surged through my veins, a melodic dance of sentiment and remembrance. The pages of apps plastered on my home screen were a vessel of my personal history, a time machine that whisked me away to the chapters of my life that Luna had stolen away.
And in a sense, she had the last laugh.
There wasn’t enough time to comb through them all. I would never be able to read every book stored on my Kindle app or read every text conversation I had on iMessenger or Discord. I would never be able to play the entire library's worth of games bloating the second last page, each separated into categories and genres.
No. There wasn’t enough time. There never was.
My thumb pressed down on the photos app.
Immediately, I was taken back to a different era, where laughter and tears intertwined. Where dreams and desires were etched in pixels. Frozen moments of joy and togetherness flickered to life with each swipe, capturing the essence of long-lost friends, unfamiliar faces, and them.
My family.
Snapshots of my childhood, images of high school bravado, and my liberating college years danced before my eyes like fragments of a vivid dream. Photos from my youth, captured in a worn-out Polaroid, revealed my long-forgotten innocence and the carefree days spent under the summer sun. The vibrant hues of a family vacation, framed in bursts of laughter and joy, transported me to a time when worries seemed distant and life was simple.
A series of candid photographs showcased long-forgotten friendships frozen in a moment of pure connection. Smiles, unguarded and genuine, radiated from the screen, evoking a sense of camaraderie and shared adventures. With each swipe, the faces of loved ones, now scattered by the winds of time, came to life once more, reminding me of distantly remembered bonds that shaped my journey.
The passage of time revealed itself in the progression of images, unfolding like chapters of a personal memoir. Milestones and celebrations were captured in full fidelity, commemorating graduations, birthdays, holidays, and the hallmarks of my life’s unfurling tapestry.
Amidst the sea of images, I discovered hidden treasures—a candid shot that revealed the twinkle in my grandfather's eyes, a spontaneous camping adventure captured in a series of blurred frames, and the magic of a stolen sunset framed in pixels.
But my reverie was soon coming to a close.
A sliver of red taunted me from the far right corner just as I flicked left toward a video and pressed play.
Warmth and comfort exuded from each pixel, from the gentle ambient lighting emanating from strategically placed lamps to the inviting feel of the old but clean wooden walls and floors. I could almost smell the scent of aged timber through the phone screen as it zoomed in onto a maroon couch at the other end of the room.
Mom. Sarah.
My sister looked just like Mom in her prime—golden, flowing hair, vibrant green eyes, and sun-kissed skin, just like in the few scant dreams I had scrounged up from that awful nightmare. And my mom… her hair had greyed and her face wrinkled, but she still looked just as sure of herself as she always had.
She still hadn’t been robbed of that spark in her eyes. Not yet.
Not like Grandpa.
There wasn’t any context to this scene, but I didn’t care. We were all together, and that was enough. I committed as much as possible to memory like a sponge absorbing water so I would never forget them again.
“Danny!” My sister’s voice slipped through the phone’s speakers, causing my eyes to sting. “Don’t be a stranger! Come on!” She patted the empty seat on the couch to her right.
A moment later, my tired reflection stared back at me through the blackened phone screen.
And I didn’t know what to feel anymore.
What more was there to do? This silence was already paving the road to madness, and I had no goals to achieve. Nothing to set my sights on. No way back to my world, no one to teach me how to master the magics of this realm and learn of its many secrets.
I was a king ruling over a frozen grave.
And as I stared listlessly at my paperweight’s empty glass screen, I wished for death.
Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop
My ears picked up on the noise, but it went through one ear and out the other. I couldn’t tear myself away from my reflection, and my fingers were clasped tightly around the expensive paperweight in my hands like the straps on a straight jacket.
There was no fear. No anger. No regrets. I was done running. Done hiding.
Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop Clink-Clop
The air remained sterile. Stale. I couldn’t hear any sounds of life or feel Luna’s cold wrath seeping into the room, but I knew something was behind me. The steps were slow. Deliberate. They had weight to them, but they didn’t sound like hers. They didn’t sound like Luna’s.
“Daniel?” A voice filled the empty stillness of the laboratory, soft and filled with understanding and empathy.
I turned, coming face to face with another set of hollowed purple armor. Even in spite of lacking any facial expressions or organic matter, Celestia’s aura was soothing—rippling with matronly calm. A semblance of sanity took hold, and I clenched my fists, trying to will away the overwhelming surge of emotions.
“How are you here? How are you alive?”
Her empty helmet stared at me before the armored head tilted down, peering at the paperweight that threatened to shatter in my grip. There was a tense pause of silence, with Celestia’s gaze switching between my broken phone and the melancholic expression plastered onto my face. “...Please. This world is far too lonely these days, and… I don’t want to be alone.”
I fought against the rising tide, desperately attempting to keep my composure. “So it’s done then?”
Celestia bowed her head. “She is at peace, and the remnants of ponykind are now at rest.”
“I’m sorry,” I flatly stated.
“Don’t you dare apologize,” Celestia commanded, her posture turning rigid before the weight of her burdens pushed against her spine. “None of this was your fault. You were a victim.”
“And so were you.”
An armored hoof pawed at the ground, scraping against the stone floor as Celestia fretted.
“I allowed her charade to go on far too long,” she said softly. “And you paid the price for it. Countless centuries of suffering, and I was complicit in her crimes.” Her gaze swept across the room. “Worst of all? I became numb to it, almost envious of Luna’s fixation upon you. I didn’t care what she was doing was wrong, and for years I justified her actions, knowing how much pain this isolation caused her. How much it caused me.”
“You still helped me in the end, didn’t you?” I tried to reassure both her and myself with this sudden confession. Was this her way of trying to earn forgiveness? By shifting all of the blame onto herself? Or was there more to this story?
An aftertaste of bitterness seeped into my throat, and I felt sick to my stomach. It was the same adverse reaction to seeing a sibling get punished or hurt, and only now was I starting to remember that sensation.
A pregnant pause filled the air before she continued. “Do you know how many times she’s chased you? How many times you’ve tried to escape this castle?”
I shook my head after a moment of lost thought. “No.”
“Seven hundred and fifty-three times, Daniel.” She remained still, but I could almost see her bristle as the words escaped her. “And she’s kept you prisoner for nine hundred eighty-six years.”
I balked, almost falling backward onto the table at her statement.
“But humans-”
—
“And what would thou have us do? Turn him loose to the snow? Or send him back alone to a world that has forgotten him? His family is naught but dust, taken by the ravages of time. There is no future for him there, and he would be slain within a fortnight—if not by his hand, then that of his kind’s indifference.”
—
“-can’t live that long…” My voice trailed off.
“You know yourself what Luna’s meddling can do,” Celestia shook her armored head. “And between your bouts of madness and Luna’s continued violations of your mind and soul, it is no surprise that you don’t remember the pains she had inflicted upon you.”
“Why are you telling me this?”
“Because you deserve the truth,” Celestia replied. “And I won’t deprive you of it, even if you hate me for it.” Suddenly, she stepped forward, closing the distance between us in the blink of an eye. “But I would ask of you one thing. One promise.”
“What is it?” My heart started to race as my mind raced to conclusions. Just what was her angle? Why did she want to paint herself as the bad guy? What did she gain from earning my ire?
“Promise me that you won’t end your life, no matter what I may show you,” Celestia pleaded. “You have tasted how bitter solitude is, so I beg of you, please .”
I wanted to run away. It was a kneejerk response, but something primordial stirred inside me, the same feeling that screamed at me to not pursue this lead. What pain would I relive with this truth? What misery would I face? Why was I now having cold feet when I was so close to peeling back the curtains?
My heart leaped to my throat as I nodded.
She stared for a moment, her silent gaze judging me for any hint of deception or slightest flicker of dishonesty. And after what seemed like a century, she finally nodded. “Follow closely, and touch nothing.”
We didn’t have to wander far.
The side passages were narrow, almost as much as the thin rows between the various magical artifacts hoarded in the previous room. No light pierced through the darkened hallway as we marched, and I had to rely upon the purple glimmer of Celestia’s armor and the sound of her hooves to remain oriented in the right direction. All the while, the scent of antiseptics wafting through the air became far more pronounced, and my throat burned from the chemical aftertaste.
But soon enough, Celestia and I came to a sudden stop.
The air felt the heaviest around the wooden door before. Heavy and stagnant, suffused with a palpable sense of foreboding and enough chemicals to mask the scent of a corpse.
Sweltering heat coalesced around Celestia as she stared at the door’s warped, weathered, and cracked surface, giving the impression of a mouth frozen in a perpetual grimace. But etched onto its panel were ornate rune carvings—the complete lunar cycle in all its haunting glory.
Sweat poured down my face, and I feared I'd spontaneously combust as Celestia’s staring contest continued.
“Forgive me.”
Celestia bowed her head, and a spark of gold erupted from her, dancing between each rune. And within an instant, she had filled each etching with meticulous precision, like an artist coloring inside the lines.
The door pulsated as if it possessed a life of its own as it creaked open, and a sense of foreboding gnawed at me. She had been tightlipped since my promise to her, and my wildly running imagination could only guess why . I gave my own grimace, squeezing my eyes shut as yet another wave of fear washed over me.
It wasn’t just foreboding and dread. There was… something. Something that I was trying desperately to remember and yet also trying to suppress. A memory? A dream? No. No. It was-
“We should not tarry here, Daniel,” Celestia said, beckoning me toward the now-open door. “My sister may be gone, but her wards still protect this place against intrusion.”
“How did you escape?” I asked again.
“I had help,” Celestia recounted. “Or, perhaps I tricked it into helping.”
“Luna’s pet monster?” I asked. I could still remember the weight of that ocean crushing me like a Coke bottle and how hot my lungs burned as they filled with its revolting black tar. Thrice, it had almost killed me, and only when I was finally in its grasp, unable to escape… it helped me reclaim bits and pieces of my humanity.
“You are not mortal by any stretch of the imagination anymore, Daniel,” Celestia sighed, “Luna made sure of that, but with her limited resources, there was only so much she could do to thwart death and keep you trapped here.”
Her gaze fixated upon something through the open door, but I couldn’t see a damn thing through the inky darkness just beyond the threshold. “She used a piece of her soul as a binding agent to anchor your soul into the material plane.”
“What?” I felt a subtle tremor dance across my lips at that revelation. “That can’t- wouldn’t-”
“There was no line she wouldn’t cross to ensure your survival,” Celestia replied. “All of your misadventures, mishaps, and despairing loneliness—it was all too much stress upon your mortal body. And Luna did not want to waste her unwavering commitment upon a withered husk.”
“She’s still inside me? Alive?” My jaw set itself, causing my face to be tense even as my shoulders slumped slightly. “Will I never be free of her taint? Or will she always be looming over me like a shadow?”
“She cannot hurt you anymore,” Celestia reassured me softly. “Nor will she haunt your nightmares and plague your thoughts. Her essence is not even an echo inside you—there is no will behind it to bind or break you. And there isn’t enough of her left to pull her back into this realm.”
With a deep breath, I exhaled a cold breath from my lungs alongside my shattered expectations. Celestia’s words held weight, but I couldn’t believe them, no matter how hard I wanted to believe her. And perhaps that was the insidiousness of it—I could possibly be the incubator of something worse than Luna. Something borne out of my greatest fears and twisted by my unconscious desires.
I wanted to turn tail and flee right then and there, but it was far too late to turn back. And I wouldn’t let Luna win again. Not this time.
“It thought I was her,” I finally responded, putting two and two together.
“Yes,” Celestia nodded. “That monster, the Tantabus… it was always her servant, and despite its original function, it would not see its ‘master’ come to genuine lasting harm. As for what happened afterward? You know the rest.”
My face tensed at her words, my ears ringing from her last terse statement. “There wasn’t another way.”
“I know,” Celestia walked forward, disappearing through the doorway ahead.
Here, the air felt the heaviest, as if it hadn’t been adequately ventilated in years. My insides burned, and my apprehension bloomed as my hands shook and fingers twitched.
Silence. My uneven breaths were drowned out by the steady white noise filling the room—directionless yet all-encompassing. Unlike the eerie, otherworldly glow of the previous rooms, the blinding whiteness that encompassed me was sterile, much like that of a hospital room’s fluorescent lights.
It wasn’t until my eyes adjusted to the light that something inside me finally broke.
My vacant stare pierced through a glassy tube.
Dull emerald eyes stared back.
…
Everything became numb. Muffled. No noise reached my ears, and I couldn’t feel a single nerve in my body as I stared at the old woman, her body suspended in bright green ichor. She had the same skin, complexions, wrinkles, and grey-white hair… she…
I shambled forward like a walking corpse.
—
A pair of dull green eyes stared right through me.
I stared back and saw nothing more than a ghost.
—
My fingers brushed against the smooth glass of the chamber. Her eyes didn’t move, nor did her chest.
…
Aching. The room itself seemed to hold its breath in sympathy. The glass between us prevented me from weaving my arms around her, and the stillness surrounding me only worsened the ache in my heart.
“-iel.”
A noise. Something brushed at my leg.
The unwelcome companion of grief whispered softly in my ear, and I began to sink to my knees, almost as if I was caught in quicksand. The tears streaking down my face mingled with my few memories of her, and I held each one tightly like fragile porcelain figurines—delicate and irreplaceable.
“...She did this,” I could only say. “She took her too. Made her suffer, and for what? Jealousy? Spite? A feeble, sick old woman… and she used her as a guinea pig! A toy! All just so she could—all of this just to manipulate me! To make me an obedient dog! She did all of this-”
“Because she was alone.”
I rounded toward Celestia, my fists clenched tightly like coiled springs. “As if that excuses what she did to me! To her!”
“It doesn’t, and it never will,” Celestia confessed. “But it is the truth. Loneliness is anathema to ageless beings like us. It is a looming shadow, a constant companion that always lurks close behind if only to remind us of our curse. Relationships always end in tragedy, friends and family turn to dust within the blink of an eye, and the pain that comes with each passing is too much to bear.”
I remained silent, my eyebrow arched as I glowered at her.
“The well was poisoned, but she still continued to drink her fill century after century. Lovers. Offspring. Adoptions. She did anything and everything to fill the void in her soul, even if it meant reliving that pain again and again.”
“And then she was banished.” My blood boiled inside my veins, and I had to restrain myself from smashing my fists into the many delicate pieces of alien machinery surrounding us. Even so, the object of my animosity was not here, no matter how loud her mocking laughter echoed inside my head.
Biting my lip, I looked toward my left, avoiding the gaze of Celestia and Mom.
Celestia nodded. “Her entire existence afterward was shaped by that millennium of isolation. She carried her burdens silently, unwilling to reach out to others… and out of that fear, she made the Tantabus. A being made to punish her for sins she could not forgive herself for. Night after night, she would command it to torture her with the same painful nightmare.
“Luna thought that this pain would help her endure any hardship, that Nightmare Moon would never manifest itself again, but we’ve both seen her darker side.”
Suddenly, she moved past me and walked toward the chamber. Craning her metal neck, her gaze met my mother’s expressionless face. “Luna never killed Equestria, Daniel. She did not plunge the world into eternal darkness. Nor was she responsible for any of the disasters that befell our world.
“You, your mother… you were the only victims of her insatiable greed.”
“What?” I breathed more than I spoke. That… that wasn’t possible. It just wasn’t. She was the crazy bitch with a god complex and child issues. She had to be the one responsible. Nothing else made sense. “But- the throne room, you said-”
“That she starved and buried our subjects under a mountain of snow? Brought ruin to countless kingdoms? Yes, I remember saying that, Daniel, and for the longest time, I thought it was the objective truth. But in the dream realm I…”
Celestia froze up, and the hum of the lights overhead became deafening.
“Celestia?”
“Don’t call me that,” Celestia croaked out in a strained voice. Her metal body had no muscles or sinew, but she still tensed and went rigid, mimicking the real thing in an unsettling manner. “I am not Celestia. I’m just a fake. A copy .”
“What-”
“She made me!” she bristled, flames burning in its chest all the while. I was afraid that the air itself would suddenly catch fire. “Repurposed and recycled a poor woman’s soul! Shoved her dead sister's idealized thoughts and memories into a hollow shell! None of these memories are mine; no part of me is me! I’m just stolen thoughts and memories!”
I blinked. My muscles were wound up tighter than a bow, and the stench of pennies and gasoline filled the air.
…
“...It hurts so much. I didn’t-” The flames in the armor’s chest flickered like a dying campfire, and she turned away as smoke billowed out of the face plate. “I never existed. My whole life was an illusion, all just to satisfy the desires of a sick mare who lived well past her prime.”
She fell back onto her haunches with a clang. “But I… I can’t bring myself to hate her. I can’t, and it hurts so much!”
Her restrained, choked-out sobs filled the now chilling air, and my arms limply fell to my sides.
“I-I don’t care if they were fake… it all felt s-so r-real. E-every emotion, every m-moment Luna shared with her sister,” the voice paused, trying to collect herself before continuing. “I wanted to believe that Celestia was me. I wanted to believe we watched the stars at night or frolicked in the fields as children. Or that we forged a great nation together, uplifting our kin out of poverty and into a golden age.”
Celestia’s gaze drifted toward the floor.
“I want to remember her. Not as the greedy and manipulative monster she became, but the kind and loving soul she used to be.”
…
My fists crunched against the metal plates of her helmet.
I could hear the bones in my fingers crack and snap against the hardened armor, but I didn’t care. Once. Twice. Three times. My bloodied fists collided uselessly against the steel plating, each hit accompanied by an explosive and pained roar that reverberated through Luna’s mad laboratory.
“Give it back!” I bellowed, my muscles coiling for another strike. Kicking, punching, screaming, my mind swirled with a maelstrom of grief and unadulterated rage. “Give me back her soul!”
“ Daniel! Stop!” Celestia stomped, her voice laced with authority. Golden wisps of energy unfurled out from the gaps in her helmet before coiling around my arms like snakes. “You are hurting yourself!”
“Theif! Murderer!” I thrashed about, tugging at my bonds like a wild animal caught in a trap. “Liar! You’re just like her! You’re no different than Luna!”
“Do you truly think I chose to be made?” Celestia seethed. “Or that I wanted any of this to happen?”
“Shut up! SHUT UP!” I flailed and dangled uselessly in the air. “You told me enough! How you hated me! And your jealousy over-”
“She lied to me too, Daniel!” Steam and heat began to shoot out of Celestia’s suit, turning the room into a sweltering sweatbox. The fumes airing through the room began to make my head spin. “About many things! And I never realized the scope of her misdeeds until recently!”
I thrashed and raved angrily, even as she lowered me until we were at eye level.
“You may blame me for many of the other misfortunes that have befallen you at my sister’s hooves, but I will not allow you to accuse me of a crime I did not commit. Do you understand?”
I spat at her, my spittle vaporizing before coming remotely close to her armored form.
Celestia turned her head to the side, and a gout of steam erupted from her face plate. “I know I am not blameless in all of this, and I would gladly atone for my sins by restoring your mother to her former glory, but that is impossible. At least with you…”
She turned, her now glowing ironshod hooves brushing against my bloodied fists. In seconds, the searing pain in my broken fingers and busted knuckles numbed. It did little to staunch the anger that flooded my veins, but I was still entirely at her mercy. Useless.
“...There was something for Luna to salvage. You still had your memories, your thoughts. She—Luna was powerful, yes, but she couldn’t create something from nothing. And your mother…” Celestia gently guided my body into a sitting position, her armored hooves wrapped around my neck in a tight hug. “...She had forgotten how to breathe.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
A strangled scream escaped my throat.
Guttural. My cries clawed through clenched teeth, tearing through the air with a rawness that echoed my shattered psyche. My nerves were ablaze with searing agony, and all of my muscles tensed in tandem with my heaving chest.
It was a primal release of torment that I had been denied for so long—and one that I had no doubt experienced and forgotten before. But even as I thrashed about in my bonds, I couldn’t escape the unbearable weight of the truth that was crushing me.
There was nothing to go back to. No one to reunite with. The world I once knew was nothing more than a few lines inside a textbook. And even if I did find a way back to earth, what was the point? Nothing could fix what had happened, and if I wanted to live in blissful ignorance, I would have never left my gilded cage.
“Please.” My head dipped downward in exhaustion, draping itself over Celestia’s plated helmet.
“We can still escape this nightmare,” she pleaded, trembling. “Luna’s experiments proved that there is a link between our worlds. We can start a new life—make new memories to replace the terrible ones. There’s no need to act so hastily-”
“Don’t,” I spoke with finality. There was a growing numbness inside me. A silent, yawning abyss. Its sorrowful tendrils reached outward for a dream that would never be realized. And no matter how long I lived, I knew this ache would never fade.
“I need to see them again. I…”
“And you will someday.” Celestia’s grip held firm. “But not this day. Your story isn’t over yet.”
“When will that day come?” I whispered. “I’m past my expiration date, and I know my mind will die before my body does, just like Mom. Just like Grandpa.”
“I won’t let that happen,” Celestia declared.
I fell silent. There was no use arguing with her, not when she was adamant about her position and had the power to back it up. It was wrong to try and abandon her after everything, but what else was there for me here? For her?
I never remembered being a nihilist, but even I could see the writing on the wall.
It wasn’t until I smelled a familiar, noxious fume waft into my nose that I noticed Celestia’s armored faceplate invading my personal space.
“I will fix this, Daniel,” Celestia replied with quivering appeal. “Everything. Luna’s legacy will hold no sway over you ever again, and… I will save you. You and your mother. I will make things right for all of us, I promise. Just give me some time.”
“It’s too late for that,” my lips pursed as I averted my puffy-eyed gaze. “You even said it yourself.”
“I did,” Celestia went on. “But even with how little Luna had to work with, she was always able to achieve the impossible. Stitching you back together in body and soul, maintaining a food ration and supply for a thousand years of complete isolation, bridging the gap between our worlds…”
The stench of pennies and gasoline became unbearable, and I could taste its bitterness on my tongue.
“You’ve seen what we are capable of firsthoof,” Celestia urged, her words laced with desperation. “You know how much power we wield. Now imagine that but with the backing of your entire species. Think of how much we could achieve.”
“What makes you think you could solve any of this? How can you succeed where she failed?” I replied, my voice betraying my lack of conviction. “I’m tired, Celestia. I’m tired of paying for Luna’s sins, and I don’t want to spend the rest of my eternal life languishing in this prison, hoping for a miracle.”
“You don’t have to.”
Like a puppet with its strings cut, I slumped forward, catching myself with my hands before my face planted against the cold floor. The pain and my restraints had utterly vanished, and it was almost as if I never shattered my finger bones against Celestia’s armor.
“I won’t force you to stay,” Celestia said reluctantly, her voice betraying a sense of grief. “But can you trust a foolish old mare one last time, Daniel?”
I breathed, my lungs and throat burning. There was a feeling of fear gnawing at my insides, telling me to flee and run for the snow-covered hills, but my sentimentality outweighed it. I had already blindly placed my trust in her so many times before, and I was willing to do it instinctively again, regardless of how foolish it was.
But she’s told me the truth. No lies, no deceit. She had nothing to gain from showing me any of this. I could have been strung along with the hope of finding her or being reunited with my family again, but she didn’t.
I looked up at Celestia and nodded.
“It will take time to bridge the gap between our worlds. Months, years, perhaps decades…”
Her eyeless gaze became level with mine, and my head began to swim in a mire of fogginess. But through the swirling daze of colors before me, something stirred from behind the open gaps in Celestia’s armor. Not billowing smoke or a charging spell, but a thick, viscous black liquid.
But rather than pool into an unfathomable abyss, the oozing tar shrunk and coalesced. It was like watching a ballet, with each droplet of ink swirling and twirling in a mesmerizing dance until it rounded up into a perfectly shaped orb.
“But as long as you live, their legacy will live on.” Celestia’s magic gently floated it toward me, hovering within arms reach until falling into the palm of my right hand. “And with this? You will never live in fear of forgetting them. This, I swear.”
Delicate and weightless, like a feather. I rolled it in my palm with a thumb, feeling a tingling spark dance upon my skin. The fear inside me swelled, screaming at me to run and hide all the while—my memories flooding with the horrifying memories of drowning in the deep.
My eyes drifted between Celestia and the orb.
She gave me a choice. Luna wouldn’t.
Foolish. Desperate. It didn’t matter; I wanted to remember them in something other than a fleeting, transient memory.
I placed the orb into my mouth and bit down.
Dew-kissed petals. The distilled essence of a summer rain shower. It was like a glass of cold and icy water running down my throat, purging the awful aftertaste that had haunted me for so long.
Once. Twice. I blinked, rubbing my eyes as I stared into the elusive, foggy veil draped over an endless row of skyscrapers, their grandeur muted by the ethereal haze. My eyes became drawn to the neon signs, which glowed with a softened radiance that beckoned for me.
Raindrops danced upon the pavement like liquid pearls, creating a symphony of rhythmic patter as I stood at the corner edge of the sidewalk. All around me, footsteps echoed through the streets, muffled and hushed, as pedestrians hopscotched past the endless sea of puddles, umbrellas unfurled like protective shields against the persistent rain.
The air, laden with moisture, enveloped my senses, carrying the unmistakable scent of wet asphalt, mingling with the aroma of freshly brewed coffee that made my mouth water.
A tapestry of sounds enveloped the atmosphere—the honking of car horns, the distant rumble of subway trains, and the rhythmic swishing of windshield wipers. Amidst it all, snippets of conversation drifted, carried by the wind, forming an auditory mosaic of languages, accents, and stories. It was a soothing white noise, and I basked in its comfort as it banished my lingering fears to the recesses of my mind.
It was enough to make my mind tingle with nostalgic numbness, and-
“Danny!” A hand pulls against my left shoulder, shaking me out of my thoughts. “C’mon, snap out of it! You’ve been standing here for ages!”
I turned my head, a smile tugging at my lips.
“Sorry, sis! This place… it’s like stepping into another dimension. Hard to resist the allure, ya know?” The words tumbled out of my mouth, almost like I had rehearsed the lines dozens of times in advance.
“No, no, none of this.” Sarah gave her own sly smile as she tugged at my arm. Her deep green eyes glimmered as she light-heartedly glared, strangling my half-assed protests in the crib. “Mom’s gonna kill us both if you catch the flu again. Go on, git. We’re late as it is.”
“Fine,” I laughed, but still stubbornly maintaining my ground. “But I’m gonna take one for the road first. Not every day you get to see a sight like this.”
With the mesmerizing fog as the backdrop, I captured the essence of New York City through the lens of my iPhone, sealing the chapter of our rainy day adventure with a single click.
Author's Note
For all of you that have stuck to the end, thank you.
I wanted to have this all wrapped up sooner, but there were quite a few times in my fic where I decided I wanted to go in a different direction or felt the need to rewrite entire sections I had already written. Hell, I originally planned for a much darker ending for Daniel and for the story to end far sooner, but... I'd be lying if I said I didn't get attached to him. His struggles were not mine, but I wanted to afford him at least some semblance of happiness that I couldn't get ahold of for quite a long time.
Life circumstances didn't help matters either: I was the best man at two separate weddings, suffered a heart issue in late November last year in my early twenties, and mourned for the loss of my grandparents... it's been rough, I'm not going to lie.
But regardless of all that... I'm happy to have achieved this milestone---to finally have something to be proud of.
Did things balloon well past my original estimates? Yes. Did it make the story overall worse? Possibly. Did I enjoy writing it regardless? Without a doubt. Did you really travel all the way out to New York just to take that photo? Of course.
I don't plan on quitting any time soon, so expect some new fics sometime shortly after I take a small siesta.
As for my prereaders and editors... I cannot thank you enough for everything. This wouldn't have been possible without your help, and I am so glad to have met you all. And even if someday we part ways, I will never forget you and what you did for me.
-Until next time
It's sobering to realize just how many people disappear into thin air every year.
Just by not being in the direct line of sight of somebody that knows you before getting poofed is often enough for you to become just another statistic. Worried calls flood into your local police station by panicked friends and relatives end up being nothing more than a bandage on a festering wound; the forty-eighth hour has already passed.
It was already too late.
There was no reason for you to disappear. You didn’t decide one rain-swept morning to pack your bags and drive down the thruway until you crossed county or state lines. You didn’t leave your phone on its charger and allow the distressed voices of the people you care about to flood your voicemail’s inbox.
And you certainly didn’t choose to chase some wild fantasy that your exhausted mind conjured up.
But it happened anyway.
It became the latest local story---the new juiciest piece of gossip that traveled down your town’s local grapevine. Speculations and theories came out of the woodwork about you. Perhaps you had a run-in with the wrong crowd and taught a lesson you wouldn’t live to regret? Falling prey to loan sharks or getting tied up in criminal activity was a tale as old as time, after all.
Or maybe it was some foreign government's behest? Perhaps even your own? Your post history must have been the start of some breadcrumb trail. Someone wanted you gone for a reason, right?
The idea of you abandoning your former life for greener pastures crossed some people’s minds. Mainly friends and family.
People who gave a shit.
That lingering sense of doubt was a spiritual poison that slowly ate away at their souls as they wondered. Perhaps there was some truth to it? It hardly mattered to you. You weren’t there to tell them the truth.
Months passed. Years. Apart from a Reddit post mentioning your sudden disappearance and sending chills down the spine of some stranger chasing a terror-filled rush, there was no further mention of you.
They moved on.
You became another statistic.
The only difference between this hypothetical scenario and the trouble I found myself in is that I wasn’t too dead to care.
It should have been an otherwise banal moment in my life.
Wednesday nights usually were; too far away from the weekend, but just close enough to tease me with promises of some much-needed R&R. I could still remember my sleep-deprived mind guiding my battered carcass into my newly changed bedsheets after a grueling nine and a half hour workday.
I was more than ready to surrender to the siren call of a good night’s rest. My iPhone lay just out of reach on its charger; no light shone through the closed windows, and the haze that clouded my mind was too thick for errant thoughts to pass through.
And it would have been.
Had I not noticed the slight shift in the air.
Or the indistinguishable sound that accompanied it.
I had little time to think—to worry about the chilling breeze that filtered through the air, sizzling like strips of bacon on a frying pan before I found myself sprawled before a creature straight out of mythology.
Its midnight-blue fur and basic equine-like features were the only things that had some basis in reality. Everything else, from the spiraling horn that jutted out from above its forehead to the set of wings that rested at its sides, would not have been out of place in any of the other dreams my subconscious mind always conjured up.
My heartbeat started to race. Not from those features... or even the shimmering mane that appeared to blow from an unseen wind.
No. It was the pale turquoise eyes that sparkled with intelligence that stared back at me.
And the voice that accompanied it.
The panic that gripped at my chest had placed just enough weight onto my lungs that it strangled the scream that bubbled up from my throat in its crib. It didn’t stop the look of paralyzing fear that plastered itself onto my face.
To this day, I still can’t tell if my comatose state or genuine kindness coaxed the motherly tone that promised understanding and compassion out of her.
She introduced herself as Princess Luna, Ruler of Equestria and Mistress of the Night, before profusely apologizing for my current situation. In her spare time, she began researching and studying old tomes that had recently been rediscovered by her subjects.
I had kept my reservations of magic existing to myself; the fact that I was talking to an actual alicorn was proof enough that I wasn’t in Kansas or even Earth anymore. The prickling sensation that crawled underneath my skin when she performed the “portal spells” she had been testing moments before my unfortunate relocation had removed any lingering shadows of doubt.
But I still had my reservations.
The portal spells, in theory, would allow for travel between any two points at will, opening up an entirely new form of transportation for civilians and military personnel alike. But how could a spell such as this open a rift between dimensions? Or cross the vast swathes of space between planets? Solar Systems? Galaxies?
The chicken scratch in which the tome was written couldn’t confirm or deny her explanation. But that was the inherent crux of the issue I had found myself in. She gave me her word that I would return home posthaste… as soon as she could replicate the conditions with the spell that started this in the first place.
In return, she required me to remain in a private suite in her castle and avoid interacting with the general population. “Provoking panic amongst the general public” and “avoiding entanglements with the nobles and foreign entities” were the primary concerns she cited.
I wasn’t concerned with seeing what this new world had to offer; I had too many obligations to fulfill and people I couldn’t afford to let down. There was also the fact that I had little choice in the matter, even if the idea of charity left a bad taste in my mouth.
Or the sense that something was fishy about this whole ordeal.
With a reassuring smile, Luna beckoned me to follow her, and we stealthily made our way through winding corridors bathed in moonlight and dimly lit spiraling staircases without encountering a single living soul.
In the silence that followed, I could not shake the unease that fluttered in my stomach like a kaleidoscope of butterflies. Something was very, very wrong. But nothing came of my fears as we finally arrived at our destination.
The spacious suite assigned to me was well furnished, with a lush four-poster bed, wooden cabinets and a table, bookshelves, and even a bathroom stocked with plenty of soaps and hygiene supplies.
I couldn’t tell if it was the smell of old leathery books, the furniture polish slathered onto everything wooden, or something else that triggered a sense of nostalgia for a place I’d never been to.
It hardly mattered.
My mood had soured upon the second day. The books were scribbled in an incomprehensible text that I couldn’t possibly begin to decipher, and the claustrophobic confines of my room became apparent with each passing moment.
Without anything to distract my wandering mind, I was plagued with thoughts of homesickness. Images of distraught family and friends flashed through my mind-
Dim candlelight illuminated the manuscript on top of my temporary workplace as I pushed aside an empty ink bottle and nursed the cramp in my right hand. Time had come to a standstill in this gilded cage; seconds had crawled on for minutes, and hours had felt like eternities.
I had no way of knowing, and I had little else apart from my imagination and meager writing skills to vent my mounting frustrations and fear in a safe environment. I was confident that the written language barrier worked both ways, and the idea of the serene alicorn princess sputtering while trying to decipher my inner ramblings brought a ghost of a smile to my face.
Which was immediately cut as I hacked out another lung. I wasn’t sure if it was my asthma kicking in again at the slightest provocation of my dust allergy or just another symptom of being trapped in magic horseland, but I was certain that this feeling would plague me for the rest of my stay.
However long that would be.
I grimaced as another whooping cough rattled every bone in my body.
This sucked.
But what was I going to do? Tell the Princess? My gut instinct screamed at me to turn tail and run every time I laid eyes on her, and with each passing day, I began to suspect something was amiss.
She was hiding me away for a reason, and “keeping the peace” sounded like absolute bullshit in retrospect. Was this sham all an elaborate ruse to hide the evidence of what she’s done? Luna was only a princess ; it made sense if that book she was casting her spells from was forbidden… and that my mere existence would draw her parents' ire.
And that was just another can of worms I didn’t want to open. If these ponies were racist enough to the point that she locked me up in this abandoned section of the castle without a single guard or servant in sight-
-what would happen if I was discovered?
Would they get rid of me? I doubted her parents would want to bother with some dimensionally misplaced college student turned vagabond. It would be much easier to wipe their hands clean of the situation and disappear me rather than deal with trying to find my home or integrate me into their society.
A series of rigid knocks at the door to my suite brought me out of my thoughts.
I cleared my throat of congestion before turning to the wooden door. “Come in!”
The doorknob turned with a soft click before I could push myself up from my chair or grumble about the lateness of the hour. Or at least, I assumed it was a late hour. My weary body wanted nothing more than to clamber up to my bed and crumple on top of it.
And it wasn’t like this fucking room had a window or anything.
“Good evening, Princess,” I greeted cordially while stifling a tired yawn. I reflexively drummed my fingers on the tabletop as I stared at the azure glow of the princess's horn and the tray that it was floating with its witchcraft.
“Good morning, Daniel,” Luna said. “I apologize for the sudden intrusion, but I thought I would bring you breakfast before I return to my duties.”
My watering mouth could taste the smorgasbord of scrambled eggs, wheat toast, and hash browns before the smell had a chance to waft itself into my nostrils, but I wouldn’t let this opportunity slip. I needed to know.
I needed to have some shred of hope.
“Please,” my voice faltered.
It was all I could muster.
Pangs of shame ripped through my chest, just barely overshadowing the fear that still gripped my heart. I knew I wasn't responsible for this or for any of it, but that didn't—couldn't—stop me from blaming myself anyway, a nasty habit.
Even if the person responsible was standing just a few feet away.
“Princess, I need to know,” I whispered hoarsely. My throat closed, but I forced it back open. It was the only way I was making it out of here with a shred of humanity left.
"When can I go home?"
My muscles quivered as a wave of smoldering heat flushed through my body. I clenched my teeth alongside my fist resting on the worktable.
“How long do I need to pay for your mistake?”
Silence reigned.
I was sure she would ignore my plight and utter a few empty platitudes before leaving me to suffer in silence.
I did not expect to see her vibrant eyes dull as they stared through me.
Perhaps my words had found a chink in her armor? A soft spot that sowed the seeds of empathy? Or had she already been feeling the wimple of guilt ever since she stole me from my home?
“I am no stranger to the loneliness that plagues you,” Luna’s voice broke the tense silence. “That longing for hearth and home which manifests itself into pain that stains the soul and refuses to heal.”
Luna’s ears folded to the sides of her head. “My apologies will do little to alleviate your concerns, but that is all I can offer you.”
“Prin- Princess- “ I stuttered, my ears refusing to believe what I was hearing. “I- I am going home, right? You can send me back?”
Luna grimaced at my poorly hidden discomfort and softly replied, “The spell is temperamental at best, and while I was able to discern the cause that brought you here,” her voice tapered off, and I could see the wings on her back jerk back and unfurl slightly. “It is far too dangerous to use in its current state.”
“But you do know how to fix this?” I could hear the blood rushing to my head like a cascading waterfall in my ears as I struggled to stay seated.
“It is not merely enough to simply fix the spell matrices so that you aren't teleported to the ocean floor or plummet to your death from the sky. I would also need to pinpoint your homeworld within the vast infinity of the multiverse, which is an undertaking that trumps our civilization's greatest achievements a thousandfold.”
Luna shook her head slowly before dealing the final blow to my last dangling shred of hope. “Without a means to replicate the exact conditions of the anomaly that sent you here in the first place, I fear that such a feat is impossible.”
Fatigue flooded through me as I felt a piece of myself break into pieces. I had felt this way at least two times before; once with the death of my Grandfather due to Alzheimer's and another when my sister moved off to Pennsylvania for college. I immediately recognized the malaise that made the world around me crawl to a standstill and shrouded my mind in a thick haze.
Both times, I had support to drag me away from the abyss. Whether it was a shoulder to cry on or a night out on the town with drunken regrets, I had always been able to rely on someone I could trust with my very life.
But now?
I was uncertain if I’d ever be anything other than a pathetic wreck again.
“Then why did you make that promise?”
Luna stopped before me and gently brushed my shoulder with her left wing. “All hope is not yet lost. Perhaps with more time, we can unravel this mystery and send you home. As things stand right now, however...” A worried gleam flickered through Luna’s eyes as she stared at me. “...I will take measures to integrate you with our society and reimburse you for the damages that I have caused.”
“Don’t.” I brushed her wing off my shoulder before turning away. “Don’t make promises that you can’t keep, Princess.”
There was nothing else to say; it should have been the end of things.
The congestion in my lungs had a different idea, however.
I clutched at the grey fabric of my shirt as another coughing fit rattled my bones. Luna was upon me in an instant, her wings wrapping around my waist and preventing me from careening off my chair as I suffered through yet another asthma attack.
On earth, I had my lungs relatively under control. Aside from a daily dose of a prescription inhaler, I could function like a normal human being. Sometimes. Long walks on the bike path alongside my house? No issues. Stair-climbing exercises with in-between reps of planks and push-ups? Mild, at best.
I could’ve chalked all of this up to a lack of my medicine, but if the worried expression on Luna’s face as she pointed her glowing horn at me while muttering to herself was any indication, I might’ve had a reason to worry.
“Why have you not told me of this sooner?” Luna spoke, her voice teetering between concern and a tone that befitted a mother scolding their child for stealing from the cookie jar.
“You never gave me a chance to explain,” I wheezed.
Luna flinched as though I’d just slapped her.
“I must- Stay here, Daniel!” Luna replied shakily. “I will return shortly.”
A blue flash engulfed her, and she was gone.
Have you ever felt like you were dead, but no one told you?
This thought lingered rent-free in my mind as I shoveled another bite of toast down my gullet. I was hungry, but the morning breakfast spread had no flavor. I was upset, but I was too numb to shed tears.
I was dead but still breathing.
And I didn’t know what to do.
I couldn’t trust Luna on her word.
I had no allies in this hellscape.
And even if I escaped, where would I go? No amount of running or disguises would hide me away from the princess and her tin soldiers if they were determined to keep me locked up.
Staying in this room—this cage was the obvious choice. The safe choice . An unchanging bastion of familiarity in an ocean of uncertainty.
I felt numb as I stabbed at the empty plate with my silver fork. I would never be safe from her deceit as long as I was within the same postal code. I couldn’t care if the brief snapshot of concern and empathy she showed was genuine.
I wanted out.
I stared towards the closed wooden door before moving with apprehension. Even with the plethora of fantasy novels and movies I’ve consumed, magic was utterly outside the context of what I could possibly understand. For all I knew, the door could be booby-trapped by some forcefield or trigger a set of alarms.
Whatever sort of witchcraft was in play here, I knew that it was more than enough to replace the need for guard patrols... and that terrified me.
My legs bounced from both the raw display of power Luna unintentionally showed and my overwhelming desire to flee.
The rational part of my mind screamed at me to stay put.
Who knew when she would return? What if she had some spell or medicine for my asthma?
“No. Now isn’t the time to have cold feet,” I exhaled with the breath I was holding. “I have to trust my gut instincts, and they are telling me that Luna is not to be trusted.”
I held my breath and counted to three before slowly exhaling and repeating this a few more times. It wasn’t a catchall cure, but it was enough to calm my frayed nerves and regulate my breathing. I needed to be at my A-game if I was going to escape.
With that, I pushed myself off my chair and tiptoed towards the door. My socks made no noise as they brushed against the marble floors of my room, but I knew that things wouldn’t be that simple as I approached the wooden frame.
What if Luna could hear my every step regardless? What if she bugged the fixtures to spy on me? Or cast some spell that allowed her to pinpoint my exact location at all times? No amount of perceptiveness would help me spot something I couldn’t even begin to fathom!
“No. There’s no time for this,” I clasped my right hand on the golden handle and wrenched the door open with far more force than I intended. My heart skipped a beat as the door slammed against the wall with a mighty CLANG.
I looked around and saw no movement in the empty hallway or the telltale sign of magic; the air had not sizzled and popped like a bowl of Rice Krispies.
Without any sign of apparent danger, I took a single tentative step forward. And then another and another.
My footfalls were as silent as the grave as I turned left and slunk down the hallway.
The lack of any guards or castle servants unnerved me now just as much as it did the first time. I was traveling through an honest to god liminal space, with all the trappings and cliches included. Rows upon rows of empty but comfortably furnished rooms flanked me on my sides, and not one of them showed any signs of habitation.
I couldn’t even find a single cobweb hanging from some obscure, out-of-the-way corner. Everything was clean. Sterile. The earthy smell of wood and furniture polish was my only companion.
“Hopefully, it stays that way,” I whispered as I trudged down another empty hallway. It felt like ages ago since Luna had guided me through these halls, and I was all the worse off for it. The floor plan seemed to have no rhyme or reason to it, and I couldn’t tell if this was an intentional design choice or if Luna had set up some spatial anomaly to keep me in a recursive loop.
Knowing her, it was probably both. She didn’t seem like the kind of woman to leave things half-finished and to chance.
The only thing I could remember was that this was a bottom floor. If I found a staircase or window, I’d be one step closer to securing my freedom.
Of course, that was assuming I didn’t crumble to the floor as an asthmatic-ridden heap beforehand. I hadn’t been walking long enough to feel any form of exhaustion, but if my frequent bouts of coughing didn’t stop soon…
I’ll dive out of the nearest window before I let her take me back to that cell, I thought darkly as I took a right at an intersection before I walked down yet another corridor aimlessly. A part of me was thankful that such an option wasn’t available.
My extremities tingled.
The hairs on the back of my neck stood ramrod straight.
I paused and glanced back the way I came. Still empty, thankfully, but I felt a massive stone drop into the pit of my stomach.
Something was very, very wrong.
And I couldn’t tell why.
Had I inadvertently cornered myself? Did I recognize this hallway somehow over all the others? Was Luna hot on my heels?
Was she guarding the exits?
These doubts plagued me with each step going forward. It wasn’t until I had taken another blind left turn at yet another intersection that I found what I was looking for—a staircase.
Or rather, the staircase .
The fear of being caught caused me to falter.
It was that same fear that caused me to bound up the stairs in a few panicked strides—
—and stumbled into a hallway that was longer than a football field. Shafts of silver moonlight spilled through the rows of stained glass windows, bathing the hallway in a glow that almost seemed otherworldly.
Author's Note
I want to thank you for taking the time out of your day to read this! I am new to writing fanfiction, and this is my first longer-form story. If you see any errors or have critiques to share, please let me know!
There were no signs of civilization—north, south, east, or west. As far as my eyes could see, it was all pure, unbroken white. A white darkened by the oppressive overcast that hung overhead. A white that was slowly burying me up to my knees from the unending snowfall.
Black was the second color to grace my vision. The sunless sky, the frozen bark of a thousand trees closing in on me from all sides, the color of the blankets draped over my heavy coat. There was no vantage point for me to access, and I was sure I would lose the trail if I deviated from it for any reason.
Red was the third. The trail started strong—a smear of blood clinging to the backseat like cigarette smoke and splotches of frozen red snow leading away from the vacant seat. However, the further I left the car, the colder this trail became.
Periodic blots of red stained her tracks, which were little more than faint and wide flatfooted indents.
She wouldn’t have gotten far. Not in this storm. Not if Luna took her. Not if-
“-om! Mom!” I screamed through my wool scarf—snapping me out of my terrified ruminations.
The sound was carried away alongside the endless torrent of snowflakes that fluttered about in the howling winds. Perhaps if I had prepared more—stocked up on flares, a flashlight, matches…
None of it would have mattered.
The sobering thought fueled my pessimism. Even with the knowledge I had now, I was utterly powerless. And dwelling upon ‘what-ifs’ only made everything worse. Would selfish greed and self-preservation persuade me against my previous actions? What if I had stayed home during the storm? What if I had left my mom to fend for herself to save my own skin?
…What if Sarah had taken my place?
Exerting another chunk of adrenaline-fueled strength, I slowly trudged forward. My iPhone—which was currently nothing more than an expensive flashlight—weighed heavy in my left pocket, my emergency inhaler, and my grandfather’s lucky coin in my right.
A coin flip had been the deciding factor. It was the one thing that allowed my past self to flee the smoky wreckage of my car and brave the storm, but nothing would have changed in the end. My choice was already made the moment I drove out into the blizzard; this was all a formality.
I was hyper focused on each small, individual step I made.
Left. Right. Left.
The snow crunched underneath my boots as my mind raced as fast as my beating heart. The trail was already almost buried under another inch of snow, and I had to balance my attention between following it and my footing.
“Mom!” My lips wobbled as they struggled to contain my fear and sadness. The tears streaking down my face froze mid-journey as more and more of my psyche shattered.
Each footfall was more treacherous than the last—as if I was carrying the world's weight on my shoulders. And to some extent, I was. I would be nothing without my family, without my mother and Sarah. I became the man I was because they inspired me to do better. To be better.
I spared a single glance along the way I came. The burning embers of the gasoline fire were already being snuffed out, leaving an empty metal husk for the storm to reclaim. My animalistic side revered the flames and the warmth they provided, but I quickly turned away.
I was under no delusion that I would survive this trip. And truthfully, Iwas waiting to glimpse the frozen corpse of my mother half buried in the snow. I never considered the weaknesses of being flesh and blood creatures affected by temperature. And as my eyes scanned the desolate surroundings, I understood that humanity’s most remarkable trait, empathy, had doomed me.
The beasts that called this forest home knew of the stringent, narrow limits of heat and cold. They understood that the cold was the great equalizer. Nothing, predator or prey, survives the cold forever.
And yet, that doesn’t stop them from trying.
My body subconsciously nodded in understanding—past and present on the same wavelength. In this scenario, we were one and the same.
I knew I would do anything to stay alive, but I was being pitted against Mother Nature herself. No amount of determination would guard against the biting frost or a bear’s claw to the chest. No amount of courage would dissuade whatever beast was staring at me from the dark thickets of trees, for they were guaranteed to have nothing left to lose.
But I already had an inkling suspicion that this was no mere animal.
“Mom!” My pace quickened. Left. Right. Left. Right. Her chances of survival were next to none, not with hypothermic-based delusions clouding her judgment. This fear continued to gnaw at my insides, and I briefly wondered if I had already passed her frozen, half-buried corpse somewhere between this thicket of trees and the burnt-out wreck of my Honda.
More traitorous thoughts formed in my head.
Even if she was alive by some miracle… what then? I had left my vehicle in haste and thus had next to nothing to help stave off the cold for two people. I had no knowledge of first aid or any medicine to treat frostbite. The lack of signal meant I couldn’t communicate with the outside world.
And deep down, I remembered no help was coming.
Once in a while, between the brief periods of my eyes straining to spot my mother’s light footprints, I would find myself rubbing my face and nose with the back of my gloved hands. It was an automatic reflex, a response to an itch that I couldn’t scratch. The scarf wrapped around my face was not enough to beat the cold, and I already felt the wind’s chilling bite on my nose and cheeks.
Scratching my skin only made the flesh feel raw, like it was peeling off with each itch, but the instant I stopped, I’d lose all feeling—my face and nose becoming numb. It was another reminder of my unpreparedness, and my heart sank with each passing second.
This fear gnawed at my insides as the trail became less and less pronounced, and the terrain became more and more treacherous. The path went upward, scaling a seemingly too steep hillside to climb. Bracing myself against a dead pine tree, I slowly climbed parallel to it, my boots digging grooves into the snow and dead earth beneath.
Left. Right. Left.
My lungs were already burning from exhaustion, and I was forced to stop kick-stepping up the hillside as I wheezed.
Crack
I instantly almost lost my balance at the noise. Had my phone shattered inside my pocket? Or had one of my bones snapped like a twig?
Another bout of wheezing forced its way out of my mouth.
Crack
It was neither.
The drops of water I coughed out had frozen midflight, becoming tiny glass shards that broke with a painful noise. Again and again. Midflight, the glass drops shattered like priceless porcelain.
I began to scramble up the hill.
I didn’t know what the lower limits of temperature were in this hellhole, but I was all but certain that my breath would freeze in my lungs before long.
Left. Right. Left.
A noise, carried on by the wind, reached my ears. Flapping and the rustling of feathers. I never heard the noise over the storm, but it was a fear engraved into my subconscious memory. And then, I began to connect the dots and remember what this memory truly was.
A dark shape glided through the air out of the corner of my eye. I had no way to warn my past self as a hissing wind buffered against my left side. My body nearly twisted like a pretzel as I planted my feet into the snow.
Hands outstretched, I tried to maintain my balance. My eyes scanned the skies, looking to catch sight of the winged beast while I dug my feet into the snow. But no matter how hard I looked, I couldn’t see anything through the oppressive snowfall and darkened clouds. I turned toward the hill crest.
Left. Right. Left.
The wailing gales were increasing in tempo, determined to topple me down the slope. Self-preservation took hold, and all other thoughts left my mind as I trudged up the hill. My left arm was braced in front of my face, shielding my unprotected skin from the snow squall that assaulted me.
I gritted my chattering teeth. There was no other way up without backtracking for what seemed like miles. The terrain was too treacherous and steep in any other direction. Digging my heels, I crouched, flattening myself against the hill. Left. Right. Left. I punched holes into the snow with my fists and used any leverage I could find to scale upward.
Fear plagued me as I constantly looked back, waiting for the figure to leap out of the shadows. But not up, never up, no matter how much I tried to warn my younger self. My pleas fell upon deaf ears as we climbed.
My body’s stiff muscles strained from the exertion, and each inch of ground gained felt like a pyrrhic victory at best. But between the adrenaline still pumping through my icy veins and my idiotic stubbornness, I was able to reach the crest.
And then I made the mistake of looking up.
The oppressive cloud cover overhead had parted, allowing a white glass lidless eye to stare directly into my soul; its looming presence forced me to my knees. It was no moon I was familiar with—it was too large, flat, and symmetrical. A frantic glance at the stars sparkling beside it sent shivers unrelated to the cold down my spine. They were breathtaking, shining like diamonds in a bottomless sea… and I couldn’t find a single constellation I recognized. No light pollution dimmed the twinkling gems, and I could not spot the moving glow of a single low-earth satellite or plane among them.
The lingering and pained worry for my mother broke me out of the spell that had ensorcelled me, and my gaze landed upon a sprawling maze of buildings that jutted up to touch the night sky.
“Mom! Mom!” I shouted through cupped hands. A roaring breeze carried my voice into the cityscape, but my hope was dashed against the trees below. Without exception, not a single building looked familiar. No shopping districts or high-rises were in the distance to calm my nerves.
The colorful silhouettes in the distance resembled something ripped straight out of a fairy tale, with towering white and gold spires hanging off the mountainside in an incomprehensible display of architecture.
But before I could marvel at the hallucination of this fairy tale city, the wind hissed again, carrying with it the distant sound of fluttering wings.
Get out of there! Move!
“Mom!” Desperation bled through my voice as my body remained still, blind to the danger fast approaching on blue feathered wings.
Run!
There was no point in blaming my past self. They- I couldn’t have known. And no amount of running would have saved them or me. The game had been rigged from the start, and the Devil herself had come to collect her dues.
I didn’t have time to push myself off the ground as the fluttering of beating wings became more pronounced, nor did I have time to resist the siren call of sleep as a gentle voice whispered sweet nothings into my ears.
“Mom?” Confusion coated my murmured words, and I could do nothing as the beast’s fuzzy warmth coiled itself around me.
I didn’t understand the lyrics as the language was utterly new.
Paralysis. Numbness.
My mouth remained wrenched open, unable to utter a single syllable or guttural noise as I drifted in the ceaseless black. But despite the emptiness, I was still able to grasp a brief moment of clarity.
M-mom.
The waves beneath the ocean stirred.
My sight had long since been robbed, but my mind’s eye painted the picture for me, and I became aware of the distortions and ripples that swirled around like a whirlpool. In an instant, the emptiness inside me fled, replaced by another skull-splitting migraine.
And at that moment, I felt my skin crawl, as if something was watching me from all angles. A pair of eyes for every molecule of water that surrounded me. I wanted to curl into myself, become blissfully ignorant of the eyes staring at me in the dark, but then I remembered.
The door into my mind, the empty castle halls, how it cornered me into the servant’s quarters… how it flooded my mind with my previous memories and shared one of Luna’s innermost secrets.
I couldn’t help but ponder these contradictory actions, not when so much was at stake for me. Why did it act as Luna’s attack dog one moment and then seemingly betray her interests the next?
…Why?
The eyes blinked in unison. I suddenly began to wriggle in place, and the events of the previous dream played out repeatedly inside my head like an old filmstrip projected onto a white screen.
And each replay made it increasingly clear that it wasn’t some freak accident or happenstance that stole me away from my home. I didn’t need to be a weather forecaster to connect the dots, and the feeling in my gut during that storm only further confirmed my suspicions that it wasn’t just a freak storm.
Pushing aside my fears of the eldritch horrors watching me squirm, I held onto the scant images of my mother scattered across my memory.
Where? Where-
I focused on the bundle of blankets in the backseat of my car, the memory flickering back and forth between the seat being occupied and empty like a faulty lightbulb. Unconsciously, I kept trying to piece together the in-between on my own, but the answer remained out of reach.
Where is my mom?
Disappear. Reappear. The blankets faded in and out of view with maddening inconsistency, and my patience began to ebb away. Seconds passed, and the pressure on my forehead increased. Memories, sensations, and details flooded my headspace, crowding my already firmly packed mind with useless junk.
Candlelit rooms. Fur and feathers. Turquoise eyes and bright smiles. I shuddered in revulsion at every stray thought that suddenly flooded into me and their implications.
No! She isn’t- goddamn it!
Fighting to gain a stranglehold within my mind, I kept my grasp firmly upon the nightmare that plagued my soul. The blanket pile came back crystal clear within my mind’s eye, and I could almost taste the pungent smell of burning gasoline as I asked once more.
Where is she?
The tendril still spearing through my forehead writhed, and my eyes began to flicker.
Luna’s heavy heart pounded so loudly in her chest that I could hardly hear anything else.
I had little clue as to the cause of her distress as I was haphazardly crammed into her skull, too focused on acclimating once more to the unique sensations of her alien physiology. Instead of fighting against the bonds of this flesh prison again, I allowed myself to slowly assimilate.
After all, I had other things to worry about than suffering through another existential crisis.
By the time I was finally able to tolerate the differences in anatomy, large, wrongly placed organs and all, I could finally stare at the world through her eyes.
Familiarity, fear, and nostalgia all seeped into my soul as my eyes trailed down a lush red carpet, which spanned outward from the throne beneath Luna’s hooves to a pair of massive golden doors almost thirty yards away.
Moonlight shone through the stained glass windows, flanking the throne room on both sides, and bathed what I assumed to be the royal’s various advisors, guards, and aides in soft blue hues. Without exception, they were all murmuring or silently bickering and gossiping amongst themselves—quietly enough to avoid Luna’s ire but loud enough to make her eyebrows furrow.
Context flooded into me, pried from Luna’s thoughts as her eyes remained transfixed upon her current supplicant.
In each session of court, Celestia and Luna would meet with anyone who sought an audience with them, be it paupers or princes. The hunched-over figure that stood before Luna was no different.
Throughout human history, Griffons were always depicted as proud, powerful, and majestic creatures with regal and fierce appearances that commanded respect and admiration. But comparing these mythical beasts from my spotty memory to the husk bowing before Luna made these depictions seem like outright fabrications.
Once lustrous, the Griffon’s brown fur appeared as little more than thin and patchy tatters, which clung to its bony frame in matted clumps. Orange, sunken eyes stared directly through Luna and into me, and I could not tear my sight away from the hooked beak protruding unnaturally from its gaunt face. I stared grimly at the poor beast in sympathy.
They tried to hide it, of course, but their makeup and maroon clothing could only get them so far. And while Luna’s advisors were none the wiser or chose not to see it, nothing escaped her ageless eyes.
Her surface thoughts and feelings only further drove this point home—Griffonian pride was always seen as incorruptible and unwavering. For the situation to have gone so far south as to make them beg?
“-have already lost all contact with the Griffish Isles, and I fear that all of Griffonstone will be buried under the snow within two weeks' time,” a deep, resonant voice broke free from their hook-tipped beak, which was more reminiscent of a lion’s roar than a spoken language. The Griffon's talons scraped and pecked at the red carpet, almost like how a human would bounce their leg as he shook his head. “Princess, I beg of you, lend us aid! My people are dying, and we have no place to go.”
The crowd of ponies began to murmur louder, and my metaphorical skin crawled as they stared at the Griffon like an exotic zoo exhibit rather than a sapient creature.
“Beast.”
“Monster.”
“Filth.”
Luna’s wrongly placed heart continued to beat like a drum ensemble in her ears, and I felt sick to my very core, wondering if this memory would truly give me an actual lead or clue of my mother’s whereabouts.
Beyond those concerns, however, doubt started to creep in as the endless tirade of whispered insults flooded in. Had things been different, would I have been met with the same hostility? Was Luna just as bigoted as her courtiers?
Was this racism a driving force behind Luna’s actions?
“And why should that be our concern, you feathered fr-”
“Guards!” a white unicorn with golden fetlocks commanded from Luna’s left with a posh accent. Instantly, the name ‘Prince Blueblood’ flashed in the forefront of Luna’s memory as she turned her head. “Eject Countess Asteria from the throne room at once!”
Not a moment later, two dark ponies clad in familiar purple armor strode forth, locking their hooves around a disgruntled and surprised silver pegasus before they marched arduously away from the procession, despite her complaints and threats.
"Such flagrant disrespect will not be tolerated in Her Highness's court," Prince Blueblood declared, his gaze sweeping over the assembled nobles, which cut through the murmurs and whispers. "I remind you all that this is a court of the Diarchy, and their authority is absolute. Any who would undermine their rule or sow discord will face swift and severe consequences. His gaze lingered on a few of the more vocal dissenters, daring them to challenge his words. "Let us not forget why we are here. We serve the realm, and we serve the Princesses. Anything less is unacceptable."
Silence reigned.
The Prince shifted, his teal eyes meeting the Griffon’s golds.
“Such a plan would not be feasible, even if we could spare the cost, Your Excellency,” Prince Blueblood finally spoke. “The unchecked blizzards scattered across the region buried the only land bridge and the rail line connected to it. And if we could, by some miracle, ferry enough ponies to clear the blockage and tame the storm, we would still need to make repairs. There is no doubt in my mind that the rail line’s enchantments have long since failed to prevent embrittlement and breakage of the tracks.”
Luna’s eyes glanced toward the empty throne beside her. Guilt, moroseness, regret—she smothered these feelings within the blink of an eye, and I could only watch on in jealousy as her serene regal mask remained intact.
Looking through her eyes, none of the ministers, advisors, and assorted hangers-on noticed anything more than Luna nodding her head, but I couldn’t blame them. Luna was always fond of her masks, after all.
“How can you be so heartless? We can’t just abandon them in their time of need!” a mare at the far end of the semi-circle to Luna’s right proclaimed. Luna’s eyes instantly snapped to attention, and I felt a ghost of a smile spread across Luna’s muzzle as she laid eyes upon the source of the outburst.
Memories flickered before our eyes, and the room’s atmosphere became lighter and much warmer. To Luna, the purple unicorn’s gentle and rounded face was the picture of kindness—her generous spirit was infectious, and her smile was like a balm that soothed the soul. There was no undercurrent of lust in Luna’s affection for her, only a strong familial bond despite not sharing the same lineage.
But just as quickly as these feelings came, images of a black spiral notebook adorned with swirling stars flashed before her eyes, followed by an undercurrent of guilt.
Before, this sensation had been more restrained. Luna’s inner thoughts and desires had been guarded by some unseen force, and I could only pick up upon things that floated to the surface.
Something had changed, and a latch was unlocked inside Luna’s mind. An aged wooden door, not dissimilar from the dozens I had sprinted past inside the castle. Questions of my own arose from this development, but they all stemmed from a similar thread.
Was that monster responsible?
I hesitated, staring into the dark abyss that beckoned from the entrance.
Why help me now? Why betray its master? What was going on?
If I want my answers…
Luna blinked as I stepped through.
Color and sound washed over me, and my senses were overloaded as I felt myself being pulled apart. But just as suddenly as it began, the sensation subsided, and I found myself standing both inside a new place, yet also still trapped behind Luna’s eyes.
My mindscape had been nothing more than a simple bedroom, but Luna’s? It was a castle, a maze of endless corridors, each with rooms filled with seemingly useless baubles and trinkets. And without exception, each solitary one was almost double in size compared to my cramped, damp hovel.
It was pure happenstance that the room I ended up in had any value.
Instincts drove me forward, and I grabbed a faded portrait from off the wall.
Instantly, it started to crumble to dust in my hands, but not before I beheld the fleeting memories hidden within. Whispered lullabies, playful banter at morning breakfasts, stargazing in ever-expansive wheat fields—I parsed through them all, desperately searching for any clues I could find.
Not a second later, the rug was pulled out from my feet.
A presence, a shadow—it clawed its way through the wall to my right and barreled toward me like a wailing banshee. All the while, a ringing echo of pain resided within the emptiness it left behind, and I felt it because Luna did too.
Luna hissed in pain, and I hastily retreated into her mind's endless maze of hallways like a wounded burglar. Waiting in a side passage, I held my metaphorical breath as Luna blinked. Twice. Thrice. Her thoughts drifted toward the moon, which stared down at us unblinkingly.
The alicorn’s wrongly placed heart pounded faster inside her chest—fast enough that I thought it would burst out of her ribcage. And for a moment, the air felt thin and sterile.
…
“Then what would you have us do? We have no means to evacuate the population of an entire country, nor would the Griffons tolerate such a gesture,” Blueblood continued, remorse creeping into his voice like a cold wind on a winter’s night. “It is a sad state of affairs, but we hardly have the means to safeguard our population from the cold and hunger.”
Luna chewed her lip. The sound of blood rushing in her ears dulled, and her thoughts drifted instantly toward the debate.
I sighed in relief.
Twilight Sparkle, the faithful student of Princess Celestia, stared between Blueblood and the dejected form of the Griffon ambassador with fierce determination, her eyes never leaving them as she unfurled a map with her magic.
“Manehatten’s Fifth Fleet still has yet to be mothballed.” She pointed her hoof toward a coastal city bordering the edge of the ‘Celestial Sea.’ Judging by the map, the gap between both countries would be just an average cruise for the galleons and carracks of old. With magic in play, such a journey would most likely be trivial. “We can use Trottingham as a staging point to ferry supplies or refugees to and from the Guto River and Wingcrest city within the week.”
“Such an undertaking would require more pony-power than we can spare unless we run the ships on skeleton crews.” Blueblood’s eyes scrutinized the map as intently as a scholar decoding an ancient manuscript. “And even then, the weather alone will be arduous at best, assuming the oceans won’t freeze over before the Fifth can complete its voyage.”
“That will be of no concern. By my calculations, it will take at least a year before the oceans freeze over,” Luna suddenly interrupted. Unlike the past few nightmarish hours, Luna spoke plainly, like she used to when I was dancing upon her strings like a good little boy. Tilting her head, Luna regarded the ambassador, even as her heart still thumped loudly in her chest. “But I fear that this goodwill gesture will not be met with unanimous support from your people.”
The griffon’s gaunt head bowed to the floor as they lost themselves in deep contemplation.
“Our kind is no stranger to hardship and suffering,” he began, unaware of the small entourage of ponies slinking in through the throne room doors behind them. They thankfully had a sense of decorum to be as quiet as mice as they filtered in, much to the relief of Luna’s frayed nerves. “And many still see it as a badge of honor or pride, often to the point of utter delusion. O-our country has been in shambles for decades, even before this crisis, driven to ruin by the erosion of trust and kinship while avarice and selfishness are placed upon a golden pedestal.”
Pangs of empathy speared through Luna’s heart as the crestfallen Griffon paused to recollect himself, and I empathized with his plight, despite knowing how this all ended.
“I have sworn an oath to not mislead or lie to those of you here today, your h-Highness.” Despite the tremble in his voice, the Griffon remained unwavering in their address to Luna’s court. “So it is with a heavy heart that I must admit I do not know. I have no authority over Griffonkind or any landed titles, and I am nothing more than a glorified courier, but I have faith that my people will see reason in these trying times.”
“We cannot make a judgment call upon faith alone,” Blueblood replied. “Such a gamble could become an unmitigated disaster, and I will not be responsible for starting a war we cannot afford to wage.”
“That won’t happen,” Twilight countered, pointing dramatically at the prince. “We’re not enacting some grand military operation, and we wouldn’t need to set hoof onto Griffonstone soil if the Griffons reject our aid!”
“Irrelevant. A fleet of our ships darkening their shores alone would be seen as an act of war,” Blueblood shook his head. “And that’s not to mention the logistical nightmare that would ensue during this… relief effort .”
Blueblood’s tired eyes roamed to the Griffon representative and back to Twilight as he trudged toward the center of the throne room. “You are a very well-learned and studious mare, Twilight. So tell me, what does a Griffon’s diet consist of?”
Twilight Sparkle blinked before clearing her throat.
“Despite Griffons being omnivorous creatures, it is often overlooked that plant matter makes up a significant portion of their diet. In fact, many griffons actively seek out certain vegetation for its nutritional benefits, such as huckleberries, which are high in antioxidants, or Yampa roots, which are high in carbohydrates, respectively,” Twilight spoke clinically as if reading off a peer-reviewed study toward Luna’s courtiers.
I spared a glance of my own at the Griffon and Blueblood. A hot wave of embarrassment washed over the ambassador, causing his brows to furrow as he looked on with a tightened jaw.
Blueblood frowned.
“This is further reflected within their recipes for bread, pies, and cakes-”
“You do not deny that meat and protein are still a stringent requirement for a Griffon’s diet, Twilight?”
“Of course.” Twilight nodded with confidence. “But that will be a nonfactor in this scenario. Other dietary supplements will suffice for the journey, while fishing can be a fallback option should the need arise.”
“All good ideas in theory,” Blueblood sighed. “But we all know that even the best-laid plans can fall apart.”
“And what makes you think that?” Twilight countered, agitation creeping into her voice as she furrowed her brows. The crowds of courtiers around her began to murmur quietly like a small stream trickling over rocks. “We have the ships, we have the crew to commandeer them, and despite the storm’s best efforts, we still can supply and feed them all, refugees included.”
“Having all the supplies in the world would not matter if we cannot get them to where they are needed most,” Blueblood’s tone became exasperated as he rolled his eyes. “Need I remind you that we are already struggling as is to supply our cities and outer territories? Our shipping lanes are buried underneath hoofuls of snow, and our weather teams are stretched thin trying to protect our breadbasket regions from the cold.”
Blueblood paused for a second, and I could feel Luna becoming increasingly swayed by his words with each syllable, despite a lingering doubt creeping in from her tangled gut.
“But if we assume, for a mere moment, that we are able to supply the sailors of the Fifth Fleet, supply at Trottingham without being blown off course from the increased wind speeds, and then make port on Griffonstone without going aground, there’s still a small detail that you have missed.”
Twilight looked at him quizzically, and I could sense that she was unconvinced by his words, assuming him to be little more than a pony supremacist like the rest of the gathered ponies in the throne room.
Blueblood allowed Twilight’s silent judgment of his character to roll off his shoulders as he tilted his head toward the Griffon ambassador. “Your Excellency, may I inquire about the nature of grains you grow? What sort of grains do your people use?”
“Buckwheat, rye, and barley, your Highness,” the Griffon spoke dejectedly. His beak watered at the mere idea of food, clicking and grinding against each other like a clock ticking. “But I fear we must refer to growing in the past tense now. Nothing grows in Griffonstone anymore.”
“And this is the heart of the matter, is it not? You cannot feed your people, and we do not have the means to ship our meager grain output to you.”
“Equestria doesn’t-” Twilight began speaking, but Blueblood quickly cut her off mid-sentence.
“Grow enough grain. Hay was our primary domestic trade and export, while wheat only comprised twelve percent in comparison. And of that twelve percent, most of our grain output is scattered in pockets of farmland outside Fillydelphia and the valleys beneath Canterhorn Mountian, assuming there are even any left.”
Despite his best efforts to keep himself calm and collected, Luna could already tell that Blueblood’s mask was slipping. Willpower alone prevented him from pacing in circles or massaging his temple, among other subtle ticks that Luna had grown accustomed to whenever she saw him in private.
Instead, his brow creased, flicking away beads of sweat from his eyes as he wracked his brain for a solution.
“No choice is without sacrifice,” Twilight verbally pounced, taking Blueblood’s silence as a moment of weakness. “And I know you agree with me on this. We can afford, no, must give up this sliver of luxury if it means the Griffon race survives this endless night.”
The courtiers around them whispered, their voices as silent as scurrying mice to avoid the prince’s ire again, but Twilight remained resolute, and I found agreeing with Luna as she admired her resolve.
“...Find me a solution, Twilight.” Blueblood finally said. “Help me untangle this logistical nightmare, and you will have my support, but not a moment sooner. I will not let even more chaos befall our nation.”
“I already have.”
A scroll coated in violet magic floated in from behind Twilight, gliding in like an answer to a prayer. Blueblood instantly snatched it out of the air, bucking decorum to the wayside as his eyes darted over the contents.
Luna inwardly smiled with swelling pride.
“T-this,” Blueblood caught himself mid-stutter and paused momentarily as he violated the scroll’s contents with his eyes. “The science behind Clover the Clever’s Entangled Transport Spell was proven to be flawed and violated the very understanding of magical principles.” His widened eyes locked onto Twilight like a missile. “How?”
“Not how, why ,” Twilight responded. “We didn’t solve it as much as unvaulted it. Clover the Clever had already created a solution to the frankly absurd amount of magic required for the spell. But just like her namesake suggests, she rightly feared the potential abuse such a spell could cause if it fell into the wrong hooves. Entire armies could teleport miles across any terrain at will, or entire towns could be displaced in an instant.”
Twilight wheezed, catching her breath for a moment.
“O-Of course, some fine-tuning was needed to allow for a longer range, but I have ninety-nine percent confidence that this spell won't suffer from any catastrophic consequences. So no, there’s no chance of displacing ponies into the earth or inside someone’s walls. Any questions?”
The crowd’s murmurs grew louder, with most of the gathered ponies in shock from the news, and I could sympathize. This spell had so much untapped potential, and I bet the savvy businessmen in the crowd were foaming at the mouth to get their hands—or hooves on it.
“May I?” Luna asked, motioning toward the scroll with an outstretched forehoof.
Blueblood nodded, hefting the scroll over to Luna with his magic.
Like every other book or scroll I had read in Luna’s castle, I couldn’t read the chicken scratch that passed for written language here, even with Luna’s knowledge. The disappointment I felt was an understatement, and I had to force myself to resist screaming as she studied the contents of Twilight's spellwork.
Thoughts and concepts utterly alien to me crossed Luna’s mind—spell resonances, arcane efficiency ratios, and fractal calculus, just to name a few. Had I even had the basics of knowledge in magic, all of this information would have been a godsend. Granted, I wouldn’t be able to whip up a portal home with the snap of my fingers, but I could have done something with this.
But just before I could sulk from the arcane knowledge slipping through my fingers, I heard a noise.
Looking up from the edges of Luna’s eyes, I peered over the edge of the scroll and into the golden throne doors, unsure as to what Luna’s ears subconsciously perked up from.
“I have seen enough,” Luna sat up from her seat on the throne, wings outstretched wide as she began her proclamation. “While Blueblood’s arguments are sound, it would be against the very ideals of Harmony itself to allow any species to waste away from the cold and hunger. Thus, I shall enact two initiatives immediately.”
The crowd stood with rapt attention.
I kept my focus on the doors.
“Firstly, I shall put into effect ‘Operation Outreach’ to ease the burden upon our overtaxed supply lines via Clover’s Entangled Transport Spell, which will be implemented post haste. This, by extension, will allow our weather teams to be redeployed to safeguard our cities and farmlands from the storms.”
Luna’s eyes fell upon Blueblood.
“Next, I shall begin preparations to execute ‘Operation Rough Seas,’ which will begin after ‘Operation Outreach’ has been implemented. Prince Blueblood, you shall oversee the Fifth Fleet personally for this mission. Ensure the safe passage of the Griffon refugees to our shores.”
“I understand, Your Majesty. The Fifth’s final voyage will be-”
CRASH
Everyone’s heads swiveled.
A growing cacophony of raised voices and shuffling hoofsteps could be heard beyond the throne room door, building into an unsettling clamor that threatened to drown out the proceedings within.
Not even a moment later, the floodgates yawned open.
The shapes and colors exploding before my eyes were as diverse as a garden in full bloom.
It took a moment for Luna’s eyes to adjust to the throng of ponies that descended upon her throne, which was as loud as a descending swarm of bees, with their buzzing and humming filling the air.
“Vile beasts!”
“Down with the moon tyrant!”
“Bring back the sun!”
“Your kind doesn’t belong here!”
“ORDER! ORDER!” Blueblood bellowed. His voice reverberated across the room, but it struggled to stay aloft over the tidal wave of complaints and racist remarks that flowed through it like a tidal wave.
Without hesitation, Luna’s guards went to work.
Two hurried the terrified Griffon along, positioning himself beside Luna’s throne while the others met the crowd head-on. Soon, the purple-clad soldiers formed a shield wall with their bodies, pushing back the crowds with the blunt end of their spears.
The masses, still flowing like blood seeping out of an open wound, continued to pour in through the doors; the bodies of the previous protesters pushed against the ponies in the forefront, crushing them against the soldier’s defenses.
Luna blinked, looking at the protesters in stunned disbelief, which soon turned to mounting fury as a familiar silver pegasus appeared at the forefront of the crowd. A splitting headache shattered my psyche as pressure built up in her forehead and cascaded into her spiral horn.
Rumbling. Something rumbled deep inside Luna’s too-long throat, shooting upward like magma flowing inside an active volcano. Her tongue scraped at the upper ridge of her mouth, suppressing the urge to bite down on her tongue as her rage reached critical mass.
“Go home, featherbrain!”
“Where is Celestia, vile beast?”
“Burn in Tartarus, Nightmare Moon!!”
“Bring back Celestia! Bring back the sun!”
“SILENCE!”
A wave of azure magic speared outward, enveloping the protesters in one fell swoop.
Instantly, my darkest thoughts and fears flashed before me as screams and shouts ceased, and silence filled the air. I dared not to look, knowing what kind of monster Luna was and what she was capable of. This was all in the past—a foul and dark memory… I knew I couldn’t change a thing, but it didn’t matter.
I did not want to be an accessory to her crime.
…
Thump. Thump.
Luna’s heart thumped inside her chest, shattering the silence that dawned upon the room.
Thump. Thump.
In. Out. Luna breathed shakily, her voice caught somewhere inside the vast tunnel that was her throat. The scent of pennies and gasoline danced across her tastebuds and sleuthed through her nasal cavities, causing her stomach to twist into a Mobius Strip.
Against my will, I peered through Luna’s ageless eyes.
They were strewn about like discarded toys in a child’s messy room. Lifeless dolls with glassy eyes—their twisted facial expressions were forever frozen in stasis. Undercurrents of red seeped through their pours, pooling onto the marble floor as it formed an ocean, which slowly began to rise.
All eyes were on Luna when she backed away. Her legs tangled against themselves, and she fell backward onto her haunches as the pooling red slithered up the throne’s steps.
Thump. Thump.
Azure magics pooled around her horn as she blinked-
Disappear. Reappear.
Luna blinked again.
We both stared, taking solace in the crisp scent of the throne room’s frosty air as everything returned to focus. Everyone, from the courtiers and soldiers to the protestors, remained silent, their faces turned downwards and their hearts pounding with fear.
She blinked again. And a few times more. It had been nothing more than a nightmare or a daydream—another sign of her ever-slipping sanity. Without another thought, Luna doused the magic around her horn and exhaled.
Silence reigned.
But there was no rest for the wicked, something Luna knew with absolute certainty as she pointed her hoof toward the crowd.
“Your expulsion from the court was an act of leniency, instigator,” Luna growled at Countess Asteria, who writhed under Luna’s soul-rending gaze. “But perhaps I have not made myself clear enough for you.” Jabbing with a forehoof, Luna began to shout. “Guards! Take the Countess into custody. I will suffer no fools within my court a moment more.”
“You’re nothing more than a monster and a tyrant!” Countess Asteria spat, glaring at Luna as the soldiers fanned toward her. History soon repeated itself, and a minor scuffle ensued. But before the mare could take flight, the soldiers circled her in a wall clad of purple iron.
“A beast who consorts with other beasts! You and Nightmare Moon are one and the same!” She screamed. Her temper tantrum was silenced as the guards ushered her out a side passage, presumably taking her to whatever constituted as a dungeon here.
“Does anyone else wish to join her?” Luna asked, wondering if anyone within the crowd were foolish enough to answer her rhetorical question. “None at all? None of you gathered here today wish to display your tribalism for all to see? Or wish to contest my right to the crown?”
Luna shook her head, staring at the amassed protestors, who balked at the mere idea of consequences for their actions. The rage swelling within her dissipated, replaced by a mental fog that clouded her mind. Exhaustion slowly crept up through her spine and into her legs as she opened her mouth to speak.
“Bemoan and complain all you wish, my decision upon this matter is final. This council is adjourned.”
They stared.
Luna blinked.
Blood and silence.
Life and sound.
The gathered protestors turned and shuffled toward the door, with only Twilight, the ambassador, and a few courtiers bowing toward the throne before leaving. Luna accepted their gestures with her own shallow nod, and they, too, left in swift succession.
A hundred. Fifty. Ten. The crowd thinned out.
“Celestia is proud of you,” Blueblood said, giving Luna a gentle gaze as he departed. “Wherever she is. Don’t forget that, Auntie.”
Luna gave another shallow nod.
It wasn’t until the grand throne doors closed behind him that Luna breathed a sigh, which she had held for far too long.
“We wish it were so, child.”
And like the flip of a switch, the throne room’s ambiance reflected upon its real-life counterpart—empty and barren. Just like it had always been… and just like how it always would be.
Luna's hooves scraped against the floor of her makeshift time capsule, her eyes drifting between the hall’s many stained glass windows as she did so. There were stories etched within each one—stories of bravery, heroic deeds, and overcoming impossible odds. The surface thoughts in her mind knew of them all and always felt comforted in their presence.
Always, except this time, however.
Luna ignored them all, electing to stare remorsefully at sun themed window above the throne. Mornfullness tinged with nostalgia spread through her insides, churning her guts and pressing down into her chest in mimicry of human emotion again.
“We never wanted this, sister,” Luna whispered. “Not then, and not now.”
Then why did this happen? Where did she go?
My question slipped through my sealed lips, bouncing into Luna’s skull like a stick of live dynamite.
—
Darkness flooded into Luna’s mind, and I was taken unwillingly with her into the depths of a verdant hell. Twisted, gnarled trees reached toward the sky with bony fingers, their branches covered in a thick blanket of green that blocked all light from the sun. It was a memory unwittingly dredged up from the depths of her consciousness.
“Sister!”
Dry leaves and bones crunched underneath her hooves as she ran, protesting vehemently at her trespassing into this cursed place. But despite the stillness in the air, Luna’s ears swiveled like a warship turret, twitching from the quietest rustle from deep within the shadows. She had every right to fear the creatures that stalked the foliage, as did any who dared to wander in these woods.
“Tia!” She screamed hoarsely. “Sister!”
Dark vines slithered toward her like snakes, alive and hungry for the soul of the outsider who dared to step foot into their hallowed grounds. She met them head-on with azure spellfire, and the trees whispered in their foreign tongues.
For every vine cut, ten more took its place. Exhaustion crept into Luna’s limbs as she fought on, her-
—
She blinked, her eyes adjusting to the moonlight.
“NO!”
Luna’s teeth clenched together, and flames licked at her mind as she focused her anger inward.
I huddled in the darkness, watching in terror as heat flushed throughout the endless hallways in a fiery haze, trapping me into a corner within a wall of flame. Luna’s entire body was shaking, and the few tattered shreds of attention not focused on me were dealing with the ever-mounting urge to lash out at everything.
“Have you come to gloat, beast? Or are you here to poison our mind with more lies?” she growled dangerously. All the while, the presence from before made itself known. I could only see its afterimage cast in the light of the sweltering flames, which provided enough forewarning to elude its grasp.
But the fire served as much as a prison as it did a shelter.
And dream or not, I knew Luna was fond of doling out disproportionate punishments for even perceived slights. And I didn’t need to imagine very hard what she would do if she got her grubby hooves upon me…
Or realized that this was all just in her head.
With seconds to spare and a world of hurt closing in, I found a sudden burst of inspiration.
“I’m just here to admire your work. Truly, I never expected you to pull the wool over that foolish old oaf like you did, but you somehow managed to exceed even my expectations!”
“Silence, wretch!” Luna snarled in disgust. An adrenaline surge flooded her veins, and the urge to scream and lash out increased with every drop. “You know not what you speak of!”
Do I not? One kingdom. One throne. There was no other way this could have ended.
—
A single beam of sunlight streamed down from a break in the canopy, illuminating a patch of soft grass at the center of the clearing as Luna approached. This place was a sanctuary once, an island of tranquility within a sea of chaos.
Lighting her horn, she fired without a second thought. Vines and branches snapped and crumbled under her assault, and the trees bellowed angrily. She had not fallen for their ruse.
—
“Enough! No more lies, no more games! We will never let ourselves fall prey to your machinations again, monster!”
The flames were within spitting distance, reaching out with gnarled and puckered hands, only stopping when her focus was driven elsewhere. Desperation filled my soul, both to escape alive and to find at least some worthwhile clue out of this.
Do not delude yourself. This is what you wanted, what you always strived for. Why deny it now?
“We will not preside over an ice-filled grave!”
Then bring her back. Bring your sister out from the cold, and return the sun to its rightful place.
Luna trembled, shaking from the intense heat and cold swelling inside her. And I was forced to feel every tense and spasm of her muscles as she began to hyperventilate.
—
Despite the air being thick with the scent of decay and death, Luna knew that her memory did not fail her. She was heading in the right direction, straight into the forest's heart and the storm's eye.
Her hooves dug into the damp forest bed, which attempted to glue her in place and hinder her at every turn. But she dared not slow down, not after seeing the bodies.
“Sister!” Luna cried out in desperation. None of the wildlife had been spared from the root's hunger. And each emaciated and crushed corpse tied within the thorny bushes that surrounded her was the sign of an ill omen.
—
“Stop!”
There was no rhyme or reason for the abominable floor plan that was Luna’s mind. Left. Right. Staircase, or corridor. They all looked the same and led nowhere and everywhere simultaneously.
A left turn. The hallway before me exploded in a shower of golden light. And through the pillars of smoke and ash, the shadowy monster clawed at me in desperation, but I held firm. I was so close to finding an answer, and perhaps even more.
Then admit it! Admit it was all your fault! You’re not fooling anyone by denying it!
“We did not hurt her! W-we l-love-”
—
Into the depths she went, with neither sunlight nor the promise of sunlight to guide her.
Brambles and low-hanging branches snapped against her legs and chest, each inflicting a death of a thousand cuts upon the demi god, who had thrown caution to the wayside for speed. There was not enough time to burn away the infestation and even less to grieve for the damned.
Behind her, the roots and vines pursued.
The forest canopy suffocated her, descending lower and lower with each step, but she did not stop. She had no time to feel fear or regret.
—
“S-She’s my sister. She will always be my older sister…”
—
Even gods could bleed.
It was something that Luna had to repeatedly remind herself of throughout her endless existence. But all too often, Luna and her sister would become complacent—fattened by peace and easy times.
Cuts and lacerations coated her bloodied fur and refused to mend despite her physiology and spellwork. No doubt a side effect from the evil lurking within the roots of this accursed forest, but still, Luna trudged forth.
Pain was an excellent teacher, and the forest taught her many lessons.
Exhausted, she took a fork down the path to her left.
—
“She has not… she… she-”
—
Luna fired, and the wall of deadfalls exploded.
It was the final bulwark of the enemy’s defenses, and Luna relished tearing it down with savage brutality, just like the forest had shown her. With hardened resolve, her hooves trampled over the enflamed kindling as she dashed into the secret hollow.
…
The Tree of Harmony once stood tall and proud, its crystalline branches reaching outward in gestures of greeting, and its blooms providing kindness and understanding. For generations, the tree was a source of life and healing, and Equestria owed its very existence to its generous gifts.
But evil had taken root.
And like the unfortunate souls caught within its webs elsewhere, malignant roots and thorny vines had coiled around it, snuffing it of its divine light.
Preparing her magic, Luna whispered a prayer to the All-Mother… until she spotted a solitary, bloody white pinion resting upon the muddy cave floor. And then a second.
A chilling breeze rushed through the cavern, twirling a dozen more within a wild dance as if trying to lure Luna’s attention.
She looked up and cried out in despair.
—
“Some things are forgotten.” Luna’s voice trailed off, filled with unfathomable sadness. The flames inside her mind flickered, fading in and out like the last gasp of a dying breath. Silence engulfed everything, and the walls enclosing us seemed like a flimsy stage set on the brink of collapse at the slightest disturbance.
“...For a reason!”
The flames reignited.
Searing air engulfed Luna’s mind, and the blue inferno scattered about like a wild animal, hunting and destroying everything within its path.
Playing my hand, I charged ahead with the shadow hot on my heels. The hallway before me stretched out seemingly infinitely, and each door I passed erupted, spewing light and smoldering ash and flame behind me as I sprinted.
Nothing was spared from Luna’s wrath. Good memories, sad ones, and anything in between were set to the torch. Hundreds upon thousands of years of memories went up in flame, all to smoke out a single ant. In spite of everything she did, this still put a sour taste in my mouth. I would never wish this fate upon anyone.
Not even her.
But I had no time to feel empathy or regret.
Where is she?
Through the smoke and haze, I white-knuckled the golden handle of an aged wooden door, diving through it out of fear and instinct as heat crept up my spine. Instantly, the door shut behind me with a resounding thud, muffling the pandemonium outside. It was like the sudden calm after a storm, the raucous catacombs of Luna’s thoughts giving way to a peaceful serenity that enveloped me in its warm embrace.
But as my gaze swept across the room, I quickly realized this wasn’t some far-off corner inside Luna’s consciousness. The walls. The ceiling. The polished marble floors. Everything was a deep shade of blue, and nothing was unblemished by the starry ambiance painted across every surface.
I was exactly where I needed to be.
I cautiously eyed the window at the far corner of the room as I ransacked the place. Drawers were wrenched open. Books were manhandled and tossed about. Hangers and clothes spilled out from the closet.
My eyes widened.
—
Dying embers. Flickers. A bundle of bloodied blankets and frail bones forgotten in the snow. I clutch tightly at the tattered blankets. The images start out hazy and indistinct but gradually sharpen and come into focus, just like the flicker of an old projector illuminating a darkened theater.
I watched from a bird’s eye view as my mother trudged through the snowy forest below, her bent frame swathed in nothing but blue pajamas and her footsteps leaving a trail of impressions in the pristine snow. Confusion was plastered across her face, and her steps became hesitant and unsteady as she crested a hill.
But despite her uncertain gait and the harsh blizzard, she pressed on, one step at a time, until Luna swooped down like a bird of prey.
—
In a flash, the blanket and the dream it cradled turned to ash.
I blinked.
Outside, through Luna’s eyes, I could see her psyche fall apart in real time as everything crumbled.
The world around us spun, and everything became weightless, as though I was floating mid-air. Usually, sensations such as these mark the end of a dream—the calm before the fall that shocks you awake from a nightmare.
But this never happened.
Another flood of sights, sounds, and smells overpowered Luna, combining with a kaleidoscope of colors to overwhelm her consciousness as we fell into the void. Space and time had no meaning in this in-between, and I could feel the psychotic mare’s psyche coming undone at the seams, one thread at a time.
Darkness took hold, and I could taste the pennies and gasoline on Luna’s lips as watery tar rushed down her throat. Her hooves kicked, slicing against the underwater waves rising and crashing against her. Her wings were waterlogged, dragging her deeper into the briny depths as panic set in.
But even as Luna’s eyes fluttered in the darkness, her eyes locked onto a pale and distant figure bobbing underneath the waves.
A pale, human-shaped figure.
Click
Click
Inside Luna’s mind, the doorknob shook like a rattled cage.
With frenzied determination, I scanned every item, nook, and cranny for any extra clues. No stone was left unturned as I jumped between memories and dreams, but my attention and focus were split.
Within a minute, Luna had already righted herself. And with each passing second, she swam ever closer, despite the ocean’s waves buffeting her from all sides. Behind each stride and kick of her legs was enough force to level skyscrapers in a single blow, and I became terrified as I felt a sense of deep yearning spread through her aching chest.
Click
Click
I turned towards my left.
A massive mountain of books lay scattered across the floor in front of Luna’s shelves, and each one had been less than useless to me. Besides the blanket haphazardly stuffed inside Luna’s closet, I had not found a single clue of my mother’s whereabouts or where she had taken her.
Click
Crack
Crack
Luna’s mind space room shook like an earthquake had struck, the walls trembling and the furniture rattling like leaves in a storm, as if a grenade had gone off right outside the door.
CRASH
I jumped back.
The bookshelves fell over like a forest of trees being uprooted, their weight and momentum crushing everything in their path, a reminder of the destruction wrought in order to create them. Deep blue hues stared back at me from the barren wall—utterly unremarkable in all fashions… until I caught sight of it.
Uneven wall texture. Small hairline cracks. Inconsistent temperature. They hinted at the presence of a hidden room beyond, and my instincts screamed at me.
It has to be behind this wall. She’s hiding it all there, I just know it.
Closer. Luna’s heart pounded with fear and adrenaline; each stroke of her mighty wings pushed her to the brink of exhaustion. The sea rebuked her efforts, sending sinew-like tendrils from the inky blackness, which swarmed her like bees.
But no matter how much the ocean depths challenged her, no matter how many obstacles put in her way, she blew through them all effortlessly. Nothing would deny Luna her prize.
CRASH
THUD
My fists struck the wall.
The answers to my questions lay just a few feet away, but I could not escape, even if I somehow broke down Luna’s mental defenses. I was trapped again. Second verse, same as the first.
But that didn’t mean I would leave empty-handed.
I scrambled, throwing anything and everything at the wall. Vases and lamps. Books and desks. I brought all of my willpower to bear, battering at it with all the strength I could find. But with each strike, I knew this was an impossible, Sisyphean task.
But I didn’t care.
The air was thick with the sound of crashing and splintering, the walls shaking violently with the force of our struggle. Time seemed to slow down as so many things happened at once.
The monster at the door. Luna in the sea. My futile efforts to uncover the truth. There was no point in my resistance, as I could not hold out against this onslaught from both sides, but I didn’t care.
Where is she? Where did you take her?
The table leg clutched in my hands struck the wall like a drumstick, and I created a rhythm that fueled my determination despite the odds. Again and again. Strike and bash.
THUD
THUD
CRASH
Fear gripped my soul as Luna fast approached my sodden body beneath the waves.
She was only a few yards away.
Strike and bash.
The door exploded, showering the room in splinters.
Strike and bash.
Luna dived, her hooves reaching out to embrace me.
I slammed the table leg against the wall, refusing to turn around.
Strike and bash. Strike and bash-
The shadow’s darkness coalesced, wrapping around me like a coiling serpent.
It was all fake, but the pain was real. The table leg crumpled like a paper cup, splintering in my hand and immobilizing me in place. Its embrace was as bone-crushingly strong as her master’s, and I wasn’t strong enough to fight it off.
Resist as I might, I could already feel myself slipping—my core essence being erased and overwritten by its malice and rage.
Meanwhile, sunspots danced across Luna’s vision, causing her hooves to grasp at empty, briny depths. Blinking, Luna pivoted, losing her sense of direction as her eyes darted around. There was no sign, hide, or hair of me anywhere. No signs of any life at all.
She tried to squint, peering through the darkness surrounding her as her eyes were forcibly readjusting themselves. Her singlemindedness bled away, replaced by confusion and mounting worry as she twisted around.
Pale magenta eyes met hers.
…
Silence filled the air, halting the shadow in its tracks.
Through Luna’s eyes, I could feel the gears in her head gummed up, refusing to turn as Celestia glowered at her. A persistent, burdening ache settled in her stomach as she spotted my unconscious body held protectively between her sister’s hooves. Unease filled her mind, and daydreams flickered in Luna’s thoughts—dying embers of a tattered and broken relationship.
But there were also pangs of jealousy. Hatred. Luna loathed and loved her sister equally, but everyone here knew there was no chance for reconciliation; their rift had widened too far, and no bridge could cross it.
Celestia looked through Luna and into me, beckoning me forth despite her eyes being heavy and downcast with sorrow. There was a moment of understanding between us—two victims suffering from the same abuser. But I knew the question on her mind, and part of me hated that there wasn’t another way.
We didn’t need to waste our breath. I nodded, and Celestia’s gaze hardened.
Before Luna could speak, a golden bolt struck her horn, robbing her of the opportunity to utter a word or dodge.
The window in her mind-space exploded at the same time.
Screaming in Luna’s voice, the shadow writhed and slithered away to the closet as the room was bathed in golden light. Poisonous as it was to the beast that stalked Luna’s mind, the light was a balm—soothing my aching soul and giving me the courage I needed as it washed over me.
The wounded sea thrashed, moaning and wailing in agony.
Celestia prepared another spell.
Luna began her counterattack.
And without a second thought, I leaped through the opening, with faith in knowing I would live to see morning.
Immediately, a thousand pins and needles assaulted me at once. A byproduct of becoming used to this… dream avatar once more, but it was a welcome change, even if this, too, was a facsimile of my human body. A deep chill permeated my bones as I adjusted, and I barely finished acclimating to the icy depths before I heard Celestia’s voice inside my head.
“Find the door,” Celestia said. “And stop for nothing.”
Her hooves, along with her momentum, spiraled me toward the surface.
Distant memories took care of the rest. Extending my arms, I began to flutter kick with my legs, working in tandem with my wings to paddle up the murky depths. Despite lacking air and the ensuing chaos behind me, there was no panic in my movements.
And in spite of my entire body vibrating and shaking from each deep, distorted boom and dull thud reverberating through the ocean, I continued upward.
Up and up. Kick and paddle.
Luna’s eyes locked onto my back, and I could feel her rocket toward me like a heat-seeking missile. Chancing a single look back, I witnessed Celestia cut her off, intercepting her just a few dozen feet away from me.
Black. Cold water splashing. I popped out from underneath the depths like a cork from a champagne bottle and into a familiar infinite starfield. Luna and Celestia emerged from the depths not a moment later, carving through ocean waves and clouds alike in streaks of blue and gold.
Enraged screams reverberated through the dreamscape, drowning out all other noise in a cacophony of incoherent rage.
I flew.
Up, up, and up further. High above the crashing waves. Up past the thicket of black storm clouds, which parted like the Red Sea as I fast approached. And higher still, beyond Luna’s reach, even as her spellfire raced past.
With each stroke, I felt a weight lifting from my shoulders and a sense of freedom that I had only known in my stolen memories. But I didn’t dare look back, not for a second. Luna’s fury was more pronounced, and her screams grew louder and more insistent with each passing moment.
Her anger was a frostbitten chill, which frosted over the nighttime air.
I pushed myself, my wings straining against the air’s currents and the atmospheric resistance. Below, the clouds were a boiling, churning mass of anger and fury, matching Luna’s savagery with their own brand of cruelty.
It was the distraction I needed.
Up here, beyond the grey sea of clouds, a floating stone path stood, unravaged by the bloody battle that had ensued before. My eyes followed along the trail, a favorable wind nudging me forth as I glided alongside the winding stonework.
Up here, beyond my greatest fears and regrets, stood a doorway and a glimpse of bittersweet nostalgia.
Luna’s furious cries rang through my ears as I dived into my mindscape.
The door closed firmly shut behind me.
A biting chill seeped into my bones as I stirred.
My limbs were numb, no doubt frostbitten, and even my ears felt like dangling icicles that threatened to snap off at any moment. Subconsciously, my body squirmed, reaching out for and rubbing against the source of heat that blanketed me. It was the only protection within reach, and I had little choice but to hope I’d unthaw before long.
Thu-thump
Thu-thump
I could scarcely hear my thoughts over a heartbeat drumming next to my ears like a lullaby.
—
“No! Stay away from me, you fucking abomination!” My arms and legs flailed about as I tried to delay the inevitable. All the while, a slight grin formed on Luna’s muzzle as she sat down on her haunches. Her mane and tail billowed from an unseen wind, and her blue-furred coat looked just as pristine as I remembered it, as if she wasn’t just duking things out with an entire army of magic droids and her ‘sister.’
Wings and forehooves wrapped around my naked, shivering skin like a weighted blanket. My muscles strained and tensed up as I tried to struggle and force her away, but I knew it was a pointless gesture.
“Daniel!” Luna whispered into my ears. “We… we were so worried!”
—
Terror seized my chest.
My eyes shot open, straining to escape from Luna’s death grip. Her hooves and wings acted as a straight jacket, preventing me from doing little else than squirming. I craned my neck, staring at her muzzle with mounting dread.
Her eyes were closed shut.
She’s sleeping.
My gaze swept the room.
The stained glass windows were still blown open, allowing the unceasing snowstorm to rage inside the castle walls. The wind howled, its mournful wails echoing through the cavernous room as snowflakes hurriedly rushed through the air, each one a tiny crystal glistening in the flickering light.
I peered out into the white void beyond, my breath crystalizing as it escaped my lips.
C’mon, Danny. We’re out of time!
Nearly dislocating my right arm, I wrenched it free from Luna’s grasp, pushing desperately against the alicorn’s forelegs and chest in a painful struggle to free myself. I wasted no time pushing it against Luna’s arms and chest.
But even unconscious, Luna proved tenacious, denying me any leeway or means of escape.
“God d-damnit,” I exhaustedly wheezed from my asthmatic lungs. The painful reality of my shortcomings came back to me in full force. I couldn’t blast or fly my way out of this mess, and I wasn’t strong enough to escape her by force alone. “C-come o-n!”
And already, my frigid muscles ached.
Trying a different approach, my free right arm hooked itself underneath her right foreleg, and with a pained heave, I began to pull. My muscles coiled, burning and freezing simultaneously at my concerted effort.
Let go of me! Get off-
The phrase “Let sleeping dogs lie” crossed my mind as Luna’s silent breathing suddenly hitched. I froze, staring into her tightly-closed eyes, and waited for the other shoe to drop.
Movement. Her head tilted, a pained expression painting itself onto her muzzle. Her brows furrowed, yet her eyes remained closed as unintelligible mumbles bled through her sealed lips.
Her grip tightened.
A moment. There was only a moment to act. Only a moment before Luna woke up from her dream.
Escape her grasp. Run. Hideaway under a bed or inside a closet. Repeat, again and again. There was no end to this cycle. No point to any of this. Everything I had accomplished and learned would be reset to zero, and Luna would assure me nothing was wrong with her goddam lies!
I squirmed. Pulling back with all my might as I struggled again. There was no plan, no forward thinking to my act-
Dull. Dull and sharp. It washed over the ball of my left foot, causing me to wince as my body jerked reflexively. Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted a glimmer of purple amidst the ocean of endless white.
An ironshod hoof. A leather sheath. They poked out from the snow like needles in a haystack.
—
"When can I go home?"
My muscles quivered as a wave of smoldering heat flushed through my body. I clenched my teeth alongside my fist resting on the worktable.
“How long do I need to pay for your mistake?”
I did not expect to see her vibrant eyes dull as they stared through me.
—
I was an eel twisting in a fisherman’s grip.
My limbs went slack as I pivoted toward the armored remains, turning and tilting my body with what little wiggle room Luna allowed. The biting chill chewed at my bare skin, nipping through the chinks her wings and hooves couldn’t cover. The sting was unbearable, but it was also the kick I needed to avoid succumbing to the siren call of sleep once again.
Poking my free arm outward, I kneeled down and reached toward the iron gauntlet.
—
I had that same dream again.
The one where the four claustrophobic walls of my room shift and constrict upon me like an insect in a venus fly trap. Luna assured me that she would stop these nightmares if I let her into my dreams, but I just-
I couldn’t do it.
Every fiber of my being screamed at me to run away and hide at the mere sight of her, and my extended stay in her castle hadn’t changed that one bit. Hell, I don’t think I’ll ever get acclimated to her presence. The hairs on the back of my neck always stand on edge whenever she’s near.
—
Close. Closer. Snowflakes swirled around in a dizzying dance, obscuring my view with a hypnotic flurry of icy crystals. I could hardly spot the gauntlet’s purple luster amidst the white chaos, nor the leather sheath strapped to it, but I never stopped.
I wouldn’t stop.
—
I remembered the smell of fresh morning dew that wafted in through the window to the hospital room and the cramped, sterile white walls that made everything feel far too cramped for comfort. There was nothing there on that bed, even though the steady rise and fall of something's chest underneath the bedsheets suggested otherwise.
A pair of dull green eyes stared right through me.
I stared back and saw nothing more than a ghost.
…
He didn’t remember my name.
—
How many times did she make me forget? How many times did I lose everything? She took away more than just my family—she stole my soul. My humanity. Sealed it inside a prison of nightmares and kept me locked in a gilded cage.
Did she not understand the suffering she caused me? Or did she not care?
These thoughts raced through my mind as my fingers brushed against sturdy, frozen leather.
Luna began to stir.
—
“Don’t you die on me now. Don’t you fucking dare, you goddamn idiot!”
—
Her grip slackened.
Instantly, I seized the moment, balancing all my weight forward as I fought against her grasp. Her hooves held tightly like a vice, fighting me tooth and nail for every quarter inch. My body ached, my muscles trembled, and my entire body shook from the chill creeping down my spine.
But I refused to submit.
The skin on my right arm turned plaid, blending in with the snowy backdrop as my fingers clasped and clawed at the sheath’s leather. Even within grasping distance, the damn thing remained just out of reach.
I could still feel Luna’s icy breath on my neck, making my neck’s hair tingle with her incessant somniloquies…
…until I lurched forward, tumbling free from the alicorn’s grip and into the freezing snow. Stinging, prickly. The sensation would have almost been jarring and unbearable had my skin not turned numb from the cold.
Scrambling. My hands dug through the snow, finding purchase within the powdery whiteness as I crawled on all fours like a beast.
Not a moment later, the dagger was pulled from its sheath.
—
Burning. I was on fire. My teeth clamped down onto my chapped lips, and my skin felt like it was sunburnt.
—
The burnished hilt seared at my frostbitten skin, shimmering with an inner flame. Despite being purpose-built for ponies, the red-hued grip fit perfectly in my shaking hands. Grasping it firmly, I stared briefly, enthralled by the embers dancing along the edges of the slender and sharp blade.
Inhale… Exhale… I breathed slowly until my asthmatic lungs could keep an even pace.
—
“Where the fuck did you go? As soon as I find my belt, I swear to god-”
—
My gaze fell upon Luna.
I white-knuckled the blade’s burning grip.
—
“I know not of the madness that has befallen you, Daniel.”
—
I stalked forward.
The wind roared.
—
“I have shown you naught but kindness and understanding, and this is how you repay us? With temper tantrums and mistrust?”
—
Left. Right.
Left. Right.
The snow yielded beneath my bare feet like broken glass.
—
“Where the fuck is it, you little shit!”
—
Her eyes were still squeezed shut, with each breath she took seeming to fill the room with a harsh, rasping sound that sent shivers down my spine. And the rise and fall of her chest were like the heaving of a stormy sea—violent and erratic in its movements.
She was still trapped in a nightmare of her own making. Still… vulnerable.
I stood over her like a looming shadow.
—
“Ah…” Luna spoke with that same fucking motherly tone. “There is but one place left for you to hide.”
—
In.
—
“I know you’re in here!” he half-slurred his words in a fit of drunken rage. “There’s no place left for you to hide!’
—
Out.
—
“It is time for your folly to end,” a blue-furred muzzle poked underneath the bed, and I stared into her bright turquoise eyes with abject horror.
—
Breathe.
—
A gnarled, puckered hand wrapped around my left ankle.
—
I plunged the knife into her neck. Again. And Again. Flames licked at the open wounds, and the scent of pennies and gasoline rushed down my throat.
She writhed and thrashed. I stabbed and twisted.
Pleading. Luna’s shut eyes flooded with tears, but only pained gurgles escaped her perforated throat.
Plunge. Thrust. Red leeched into white.
Her hooves kicked, thrashing with wild abandon.
Lance. Jab. The blade pierced through her chest.
Finally.
Author's Note
The epilogue will be released this weekend.
I apologize for the lateness for both these chapters, but I needed to make sure I was satisfied with the ending... and I think I am.
A big thank you to RenegadeAlias, UnamusedWaffle, and INeedSleep for proofreading and editing. I don't think this would have turned out nearly as well as it should have without your support.
And thank you, dear reader, for coming this far. I hope this and the upcoming epilogue satisfy you.
