A State of Mind

Luna was becoming obsessed with researching...something. Not only was she obsessed with it, but she was also keeping it a secret. Not that Celestia could blame her, she had kept multiple secrets from Luna. Secrets such as her relationship with Discord, the fear she had about the unstable way the elements reacted during the battle with Sombra mear months ago.

Celestia paused as she passed the large double doors to the Library, her ears flickered to hear the sounds of her sister mumbling to herself as she flipped pages and the sounds of her writing something on a scroll. She raised her hoof to extend a full knock on the door. To open it and ask her sister what she was doing that was so secret. But she hesitated before lowering her hoof entirely. There was no point. They were barely sisters anymore. They barely spoke to each other outside of government issues. What was the point? They would probably just get into a fight again over some sort of nonsense.

"Princess Celestia."

Celestia nearly jumped in alarm at the sound of her assistant calling out behind her. She turned sharply to see her assistant holding up a scroll of her daily schedule with a disapproving frown. "We are late to the Crown Meeting."

"The one regarding Canterlot?" Celestia asked. Her Assistant nodded. Celestia paused for a moment to ponder the situation. "Why can't Princess Luna oversee this meeting? She is moving into that castle as much as I am. I believe she should have some say in how the new castle and city is designed."

"I have brought up that...suggestion to the other council members, Princess." Her Assistant paused, her usual confident posture faltered a little as her ears dropped. Celestia took a careful step forward, growing concern told her she wasn't going to like how the rest of this conversation went.

"And...?"

"They believe...Princess Luna...Isn't needed for these discussions. She hasn't exactly been welcoming the news that we are building a capital city with a new castle. She rejected the whole idea the moment it was brought up in the first development meeting."

Not exactly welcoming to the news was an understatement, they were fighting for weeks about the matter and even now it wasn't resolved. Luna didn't understand why they needed to move from the castle which had been their home since the founding of Equestria.

"I suppose I can see their hesitancy in inviting Luna." Celestia hesitantly admitted, feeling but ashamed of herself. She gave a passing glance to the Library door before moving closer to her assistant. "I suppose we shouldn't keep them waiting. I will bring Luna next time. She might be more receptive then."

Her assistant nodded and they began towards the Meeting Hall where the sounds of distant arguing could already be heard. Celestia groaned as she sensed the oncoming headache she was about to have to deal with.

Inside the Library held a dark Alicorn, she sat in the middle of the large Library at a table. She was surrounded by ancient and recent texts relating to magical theory, transformations, and Starswirl's own journals and books regarding the studies of magic and Alicorns. Luna has been still for quite a while. Her hearing had been focused on the noise outside the Library.

Recently, paranoia had been her constant companion. When she wasn't, bitter and angry, she was paranoid. Specifically regarding her precious sister who she had started to deeply hate within the past two years. Perfect Celestia, perfect Tia was anything but perfect. She was weak. She was a fake. Luna slammed another book shut, almost throwing it across the room in rage at once again not finding the answers she need to complete what she was so willing to do.

To take control.

She listened again, smiling to herself as she could hear her sister and her assistant's voice becoming quieter and quieter as they moved further away. Luna grabbed another book with her magic, another flicker of hope ignited in her chest as she flipped to the beginning.

"Dark Arts of the Magical."

Luna paused as she reread the title over and over.

Dark magic.

Luna paused to consider dark magic. She had briefly admitted to herself when she used it against Sombra, she felt powerful. More powerful than she had ever felt before. It was...comforting in a strange sort of way. She began to reflect back to the final fight with Sombra. Her final desperate action in anger, fueled by repressed rage, a desperate need for the war to end, was to use dark magic against him. Fight fire with fire.

"T-That shouldn't be possible! T-That c-can't be-" Luna cringed as she remembered the brief seconds of an empire vanishing moments after the battle ended. Her mind struggled to process what had happened. "I-I don't understand."

Then, when she looked to her Elder sister, the pony she looked up to once long ago. She saw nothing but a pathetic excuse for a leader. A broken Alicorn who, for once, wasn't lying to those around her. Too drained to look perfect. She simply looked...pathetic. Celestia's eyes were as cold as ice as she barely glanced down at Luna with a harsh voice fueled with venom.

"He used dark magic, Luna, obviously. Clearly, the dark magic has a power we can't possibly understand."

Luna flinched at the memory as it dug into her chest. She would never forget that moment. She flinched the same way she flinched that day. Left with the knowledge that her sister wasn't any better than a commoner. Unwilling to change. To grow. Even if it meant risk. They could have saved a lot of lives, they could have saved an empire if they just...understood the darkness of the world.

Luna understood it more than most, having to go through countless nightmares does that to a soul. She smiled and looked at the dark book with more excitement for knowledge than she had when she started. She would learn. She will understand it all.

-End of Chapter Three-