Split Apple

by David Silver

31 - You've Got Mail

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Orchard awakened with a big yawn and a stretch of her arms into the air, hooves wobbling. "Wonder if it got..." There it was, slipped under her door. "here...?" She slipped to her hooves and trotted over to the letter. "The letter from me..." She took it in her mouth and wandered back over to her little writing desk, transferring it to her glowing magic and then to the desk to lay flat. "Ain't fair..."

She knew what Big Mac was thinking. He said he wasn't voting, but that wasn't really true. He couldn't not vote, because everything he thought, she knew. Though that worked both ways. They were two ponies made one. "And we're greedy..." She liked being a stallion. He liked being a mare. Sometimes, either way. She didn't want to stop being a mare, and she knew he didn't want to stop being a stallion." She set both her hooves on the letter, not opening. There wasn't a word written on it that she didn't already know.

"Ain't fair..." They also only had one girlfriend between them. Splitting her up just... wouldn't be possible in any practical fashion. And not fair to her! She didn't ask for any of what was going on, even if she was alright with it, so far...

But also she was Big Mac. He was Orchard Blossom. Separating the two was easy to think about, but not so easy to be. She pushed away from the desk and clopped softly to the mirror instead, where she could peer at herself. She was a big pretty red mare. With a stallion's eyes, she could pick out the pretty parts. When she looked at Big Mac, she could pick out the handsome parts that a mare might noticed first.

She had won that lotto, twice! "Maybe..." Her thoughts took a sharp pivot. Maybe it wasn't fair to her, dragging her around when she should be fast asleep... But she said she wants it. She smiled... Oh, Sugar Belle's smile... She was enjoying herself, even if it wasn't the most healthy thing for her to be doing.

"Which makes it mah problem." As her loving girlfriend, it was her job to care! But... What was the proper avenue? How did she fix it?

Most of the ponies she would consider talking to were quite asleep. She could go to Princess Luna? No... It was a small thing, a little pony thing, not a princess thing. Bothering her about that felt like way too much...

But there was one other pony that seemed up at random times, and was close at hoof. She pushed open a window with her magic and launched out into the night sky. Wings unfurled, she took off with strong flaps, taking a nice, deep breath. The night sky was so nice. Cool, fresh, and it held her nicely. "Ayup." She banked towards her target... and was there. "Oh." She came in for a landing with a little frown.

There were disadvantages to skipping the space between here and there. The journey could be part of the fun... She'd have to get better about choosing when to do that, or not. Skipping for such a small journey when she wasn't in a hurry was just a bit silly.

With a toss of her mane, she reached up to clop at the gate she was in front of. "Allo?"

The door to the manor swung open and a familiar butler stepped out into the evening. "Ah. M'lady. A pleasure to see you again." He descended the steps and started towards her. "Are you here for the master? He's out on the town. If I recall his schedule... He's overseeing the opening of a nightclub."

Blossom smiled, imagining the thumping beats of a nightclub, and the high-class countenance of Fancy Pants. Not an exact fit, so far she could see. "That's right kind of him. Uh... Was hopin' to chat with him. But it ain't no emergency."

The butler raised a hoof for quiet. "He wouldn't forgive me if I let you walk away, ma'am. If you have time, you are more than welcome to come inside and wait for his return. It shouldn't be more than an hour. I know he would wish to share words with you, ma'am."

Blossom blushed faintly. "He would?" Well, he was financing her, that was one reason she could think of. She was past time to give him an update on how that was working out... "Alright, sure! Ah'll wait fer him."

"Very good!" The butler turned back for the house, leading Blossom inside. "You are our guest, ma'am. If you have any need at all, we will do out utmost to see it fulfilled. Have you eaten?"

Confusing question. She could remember the dinner she had, but that was Big Mac's belly. She had to feel for her body, her belly, her needs. "Hm... Actually, a little food would be delightful." She followed him to a modest sitting room and claimed a chair for herself sitting on its soft cushion supporting her haunches. "Ya don't owe me nothin'."

"On the contrary." He inclined his head. "You've pleased the master quite a bit from what he's heard, and his delight is mine, so I owe you quite a bit, ma'am. Or should I say officer?"

Blossom colored anew. "Oh, yep, I am one of those..." She rubbed her forehooves together. "But ah ain't on duty today, so don't want any special treatment fer it. Just here as me."

"Just you is more than enough." He dipped his head as he started back out. "I'll be back with some appetizers to begin things."

Begin things? She was getting no snack. It would be a full meal, with multiple courses. Each was crafted lovingly and delightfully, making her tongue sing with pleasure. "Mmm... Fancy is lucky to have such talented cooks around."

The butler shook his head. "As much as I would love to claim this effort, it was a maid that prepared this one. You know her."

Blossom's brows went up together. "Oh! Her?!" The maid that had helped clean Blossom so long ago. "How'd she doin'?!"

"She will be pleased to know you wish to know. Allow me a moment." He scurried from the room without a single clop, walking smoothly.

A new smiling face appeared, a familiar mare. "Ma'am." She dipped her head low. "I heard you wanted to speak to me?"

That wasn't exactly what Blossom had said. "Uh, ya made this?" She pointed at her half-devoured food with a hoof. "'Cause it's really good!"

The maid curtsied low. "I'm delighted to hear that, ma'am. You look better than last I saw you."

Blossom sat up at that. "In what way?"

"You're more..." She searched for words with a delicate frown. "Excuse me, ma'am. I'm speaking out of turn... It's a subtle thing, but like you're more comfortable and settled. It's a good thing, I assure! Like you were new to the city, and now you're not. The look suits you nicely, ma'am."

Blossom waved at a chair across from her. "If yer allowed, come eat with me? Ya made enough fer two ponies easy."

She shied away. "I shouldn't..."

But Blossom heard the unspoken context there. "Ah insist. Fancy Pants can yell at me if he disagrees."

"If you insist, ma'am." And the maid came right up to the chair, smoothly sliding up onto it and sinking to her haunches. With a glowing horn, she took a little morsel to sample. "Hm, those beets were in season, as promised... Now, ma'am... If you would share a meal with me, it would seem proper that we divest ourselves of our titles and positions. I won't be able to enjoy this if I remain a maid and you, a guest."

Blossom cracked a bright smile. "'Course!" she blurted. "Ah'm Orchard Blossom." She offered a hoof. "Just a mare enjoyin' some fine food."

The maid returned the gesture, hooves meeting in a crisp clop of solidarity. "Neat Fold, a pleasure to meet you properly." She smiled with a gentler sort of happiness. "What's your favorite?"

"That's hard to pick." Blossom considered the food with a tapping of her chin. "Gonna go..." She wobbled a hoof over one, but changed her mind and pointed at a pie with a quarter missing. "This sheppards pie is a real comfort food, and ah feel right comforted tryin' it."

Neat Fold clapped her hooves together in a rapid but soft series of strikes. "That's my grandmother's recipe. Not fancy cuisine, but the master enjoys it, and I'm glad to hear you do too... She would be so happy, to know ponies feel right at home when they try it." She cut out a slice and took a floating bit of the pie for herself to enjoy. "It reminds me of her..."

Blossom saw between the lines. "Right sorry fer draggin' her up."

"No." Neat sat up firmly. "You take that back. Any excuse to think of a loved one is a good one. Don't want to go forgetting her." She sampled the pie gently, sighing with a growing smile. "Just how she made it... Keeping the memories of our loved ones alive is one last thing we can do for them. She was a real fiery mare! She hated that I was becoming a maid... 'Too soft for our family!' she'd screech. I loved her, even when we didn't agree... You have anypony you're holding tight?"

Blossom flipped her ears back. "Mah parents..." Were they her parents, or Big Macs, or both of them, which might be the same pony? Why did that have to be so complicated. "They were right good ponies, left us with so much..."

"I can hear the love in your words." She took a second bite, reducing her share of pie to a little sliver. "A pony that doesn't know that pain isn't fully an adult, the way I see it. Only a child, if they're lucky, manages to miss that loss entirely... Now, you didn't come here to think such heavy things." She willed a glass up to sip from the dark red drink within. "Tell me about things that are going well."

"Hard to count." Blossom met her hooves together. "Ah became a police officer, ya heard that right? Doin' my part, and feelin' good doin' it. Ah like helpin' ponies! Keepin' 'em safe and catchin' bad ponies that're hurtin' 'em. Mah friend discovered herself in a whole new way and ah'm cheerin' 'em on." She considered other things to be thankful for. "Ain't nervous 'bout Celestia and Luna no more, an' feel a bit silly fer bein' so to start..."

"I was terrified," gently agreed Neat. "To apply for this... Fancy Pants is known as one of the top ponies. He is a mover and shaker. Where he moves or shakes, other ponies rush to behind him and imitate what he does. Working for him is a very prestigous position. Me? Get that? I couldn't even envision it at first... A friend dared me to, and there I was, shaking like a leaf in front of him..."

"And ya got it?" Blossom reasoned out loud, considering Neat was right there, doing the job.

"I got it," she laughed out, sipping from the drink. "And haven't regretted it for even a moment. So... I understand what you mean. It was terribly frightening, and now I feel quite foalish for having been afraid before. If I could gently calm my past self, I would, but such tricks are beyond us little ponies." She leaned forward on the table. "The master will be home soon. You are too kind as to share with me, but I really should be working. He is paying for this time."

"It's been nothin' but ah pleasure talkin' with you." Blossom took a fresh slice of the pie. "And ah'll try this again."

"Then she isn't all gone." Neat hopped down and trotted off with a happy smile.


Author's Note

Neat Fold, I felt her. Blossom is thinking very heavy thoughts, hm...

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