Blossom considered the floating column before her. "A simple thin'..." She wasn't a baby dragon. She was a grown mare! How hard... could lipstick be to use? She was a fine adult mare, and lipstick wasn't going to be a big deal to use.

She twisted it as she brought it closer, causing the actual lipstick to emerge, glistening with the promise of pigment. "Just pucker up..." She made a kissy face at the mirror, but kept her eyes open as she applied slowly. She figured if she went slow and focused on keeping her drawing in the lines, things would work out. Better to be a little paltry than to look like she went wild with it and more like a clown.

She'd seen mares smack their lips, so she did that, trying to spread what she applied. It was a strange and mysterious magic, but that helped spread things around a bit more evenly. It was far from perfect, but she didn't look like a foal who got lipstick for the first time. "This'll... do. Ah like the color." A deep pinkish/purple that contrasted with her pelt just right.

She wasn't perfect... But she wasn't a mess. It'd do. "Wonder what he'll think of it."

"What who will think of it?"

Blossom jumped, coming down facing Discord. "Right! Done fergot you were stoppin' by. Um, hiya."

"Hey yourself." He coiled around Blossom. "Look at you! All big boss mare here." He reached to plink her tiara. "Have we met? I don't think we have."

Blossom squinted mildly at Discord. "'Course we..." But she trailed off, realizing... "Oh... guess not. Not... now. Ah'm Blossom Orchard. Nice to meet you, Discord."

Discord gasped dramatically. "But we're just meeting! How do you know my name already?"

Blossom chuckled at that. "You are the Discord. Most ponies know who you are."

"True." He went in to touch nose to nose. "My reputation precedes me. Now, I was not expecting to find you trying on that. Not bad... Not good, but not bad. You should have seen Barb when she tried."

"Ah heard... Didn't want to repeat that mistake." Blossom turned to the mirror and herself, and the Discord adornment she was wearing, asked for or not. "I've seen you make goo-goo eyes at a mare afore... Do you... actually care about that?"

"When I feel like it." Discord shrugged, uncoiling from Blossom. "Which I don't always. What's the term the foals are using... Genderfluid, that's me. And I mean that as literally as I can. Guy most of the time, but the gender? Anycreature could guess, but'd probably be wrong. Now, if you're asking what I think of you..." He looked Blossom up and down. "You look like Big Mac, which doesn't work for me. On the other hand, you're perfectly lovely, objectively speaking. Nice color, by the way. Who'd you put that on for? Is that who you were mentioning?"

"Um... Didn't put it on for him. Ah put it on fer me, to see what ah'd look like." She pouted her lips a little at her reflection. "Lookin' nice kinda... feels nice."

"Pass the word to Big Mac." Discord waggled his brows full of meaning. "Stallions can look good too, and it can feel nice for them too. Less lipstick, usually... but not always. Now spill the deets on who you were talking about."

"But yer jus' lookin' yerself most of the time." Yep, she couldn't see any clothes or touchups. Just Discord.

"Are you implying I'm not already nice looking?" He batted his lashes with the biggest grin. "I'm one of a kind! You can't improve on perfection." He buffed at his chest. "Or that's what I tell myself sometimes. Enough dancing around the bush. Who were you talking about?"

"Fine fine." Blossom stepped away from her mirror. "Didn't ah mention him afore? Fancy Pants, um... We're a thin'... He's mah... stallion." She colored, admitting it, some old part of her still catching up on that being an alright thing to have. "Ah'm his mare." That made them color harder. "We're gettin' alon' pretty good."

"Glad to hear it." Discord did a little clap, three soft sounds. "So, are you wearing that for him, or for you?"

"Can't be both?" She turned her head back to the mirror. "Ah like the look... But ah hope he does too."

"A fine answer." He grabbed Blossom by her round cheeks. "One of the best, from my view. You're growing so fast!" He pinched and rubbed those captive cheeks. "I'm so proud."

Blossom swatted his grabbing hands away. "Ah'm due in at work in two hours."

Discord shrugged at that. "And? I know your trick. You can be there whenever you want, so two hours may as well be forever from now." He zipped to the window and peeked out. "You ever patrol Canterlot? It's where you started and all."

"Huh." Blossom joined Discord at the window. "Reckon ah don't much... Ya may have a point."

"I had a point?! I was just asking." He waved over the unicorn city. "I imagine they get up to trouble as much as the other cities. So, tell me! What's the difference between one city and the next, or are they all about the same when you get down to it? They are all ponies."

"They are... But they ain't the same." Blossom leaned out, arms on the sill of her window. "Each city has a different taste to it, an' the ponies inside 'em, but each pony is their own pony. Canterlot's a bit more refined than the others. The ponies you find here usually got refined problems. But it ain't always that. A refined fire is still a fire. Somepony snatch yer thin's, it's just as snatched, refined or not. There ain't such a thin' as a refined punch to the face... But it can happen here same as anywhere else."

"I imagine..." Discord looked down at Discord on the street, Discord approaching and making a menacing gesture. A punch, delivered with a fresh set of tea and a hat tip. "Refined punches are still punches..."

Blossom swatted at Discord. "Stop bein' silly!" She may as well requested the sun stop being so darn warm. "Still, ya got a point, meant or not... Ah should patrol Canterlot sometimes." She reached for her walkie talkie. "Blossom checkin' in. It alright if ah check Canterlot tonight?"

A soft hiss of static, then a pony spoke, "Roger that, Officer. Canterlot's lucky to have ya! Over."

Discord rolled a hand. "I hate to ask... But that thing can't reach all the way to the other cities. How did they respond?"

"They didn't." Blossom tucked the receiver away on her outfit for later wearing. "Local dispatch hears it, calls over, gets an answer, tells me. Works wherever ah happen to be. 'Less ah happen to be in the middle of nowhere, but why would ah be policin' that?"

"No clue... but it was your idea." Discord snorted with a little smile. "Still looking forward to when you catch me being naughty. Be sure to cuff me gently, alright? I'm a delicate creature." He batted his eyelashes, putting on his best innocent look.

Blossom lifted Discord with her magic. "Yer teasin'. 'Sides, ya shouldn't be breakin' no laws'd need me to cuff ya anyway. Ah'd be powerful upset if ya did! Be good." She shook him in her magic as she waved a hoof at him. "No friend wants to arrest a friend... but ah will, if ya make me."

"The fire." He batted his lashes with a new meaning. "I like it. Such a little warrior you are."

"Somepony's gotta... To keep 'em all safe..." She released him and trotted in a jog over to the door. "Gonna go for a little walk, then get ready fer work. Comin'?"

"Bold!" He landed next to her, ready to follow. "Yes, let's show all of Canterlot your new look. They'll be so glad to have you on the case."

Blossom swatted at him, but they went out for that walk anyway.

"Twi."

Twilight started, caught mid-walk. "Hello, Big Mac. Can I help you?" She smiled brightly, recovering from her surprise. "I don't often see you around here on this day of the week."

"No, jus' a little thing... a thought..." He tapped his hooves together. "Ah wanna try somethin', and yer 'bout the only ponly aside Starlight ah can think of, an' ah trust you a lot more, if we're bein' honest about it."

Twilight waved Big Mac off of the direct path of the road other ponies were using. "What's on your mind? If I can help, I want to."

"'xactly what ah was hopin'... Now... This'll be funny, or confusin'... But, ah realy wanna try it."

Twilight angled her head left and right, nose wriggling. "The way you say that... Do you want to be a princess? That's beyond my abilities, I'm afraid."

Big Mac waved that away. "No! No... not 'xactly... But Ah wanna try the other side." He motioned as if stepping over a fence. "Jus' to try it, as me, this." He pointed to himself firmly. "Ah know ah've felt it... But that weren't me. They ain't me. They ain't livin' mah life. It ain't the same."

Twilight considered Big Mac's form. "But not princess... You want to be a unicorn? That's quite a--" She was cut off, Big Mac's hoof on her lips, though drawn away a moment later. "Not that... Pegasus?" He shook his head. "The only thing left... Is what Barb tried." She took a shuddering breath. "But you want to... try it?"

"If ah can?" He sat back, looking releived with some understanding acheived. "Ah wanna... As me! Not as somepony else... Big Mac, not Orchard Blossom. Right fine mare she is, but she got her own life."

"That she does..." Twilight let out a slow breath. "Such a spell is possible... A temporary version is far simpler than a permanent treatment would be. That doesn't make it easy... Have you spoken to your family? They've shown... remarkable resilience, but this is you, not some pony far away in Canterlot."

"Ain't the same," he agreed with a nod. "But ah wanted to talk to you first. If ya said no, then there ain't nothin' left to talk about. If ya say yes, then ah can talk to them. Won't go nowhere until after that, promise that much." He rose to his considerable height. "Will ya do it? Please?"

"Forgive me for asking... But you seem fairly content, as you are. Why?" She angled an ear at him. "Don't take that the wrong way. Only you can know you. But you can share? I'd like to know, if you care to tell me."

"It can be hard to pit to words proper..." But he tried to do that. "It's different... Done felt it, through Blossom... But she's a princess, in another place." He threw his head up towards Canterlot. "She ain't Big Mac, here, in Ponyville, workin' the farm... Ah wanna be me, but maybe me... ain't who ah assumed they were. You got that power." He smiled awkwardly at Twilight. "Unicorn wizard, you can work magic that's... like miracles. Can ah have one? Just to try..."

Twilight rubbed her cheek gently. "Not to offend... But you already have a girlfriend. If you decide you like this... How do you plan to bring it up to her?"

"Twilight." He leaned in with a knowing smile. "She swings both ways. We'll find new ways to show we love each other, but Ah'd still love her, and... darn well hope she'd still love me..."

Twilight cycled her hooves. "You couldn't... love her as you do now... Sorry, this is awkward to go over, but... Don't you enjoy that?" She hiked a brow. "I... imagine you do?"

"Sure." Big Mac lowered to his belly. "But ah'd enjoy findin' me even more. Ah'll still be Big Mac. Jus' a question of what Mac stands for."

Author's Note

Mckenna? Is Big Mac barking up the wrong tree?

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