When the ponyta walked into the center of the room and lit its horn, the torches lining the walls and ceiling burst to life, filling the room with warm, orange light.

“Um…” Ebon looked back at the ponyta, unable to move with his knot still lodged inside his partner. “I hope you’re not here to battle because I’m a little preoccupied.”

The ponyta giggled into one of her gold-capped horseshoes. “Now what kind of host would I be if I attacked my guests on sight?”

Glassie, followed quickly by Edelweiss burst into the room, the latter speaking as she beheld the three of them. “Whoa. This is not good! We gonna rumble, boss?” She took a combat pose as she spoke.

“Not quite yet, Glassie,” Ebon replied, his voice still husky and deep from his earlier exertions, wishing for one of the very few times that his knot would subside more quickly.

Despite his predicament, he faced the ponyta, noting her elaborate attire. It included four golden shoes, a royal crown, and an ornamental breastplate. Whoever or whatever this strange-looking pastel-colored ponyta was, she surely held a very high station in her society. “Were you the one who sent me that letter, stranger?”

“No, umbreon, but I commissioned the messenger who sent it to you on my behalf. Or is that the same thing as me sending it? My stationery doesn’t spontaneously combust after being opened.” The royal-looking ponyta shrugged its equine shoulders. “I’ll leave you to decide that detail.”

“Riiight,” Ebon replied slowly. This was surely the daftest encounter with a ponyta he’d ever had, though thankfully not the most threatening given his vulnerable position. “Why did we not encounter anyone at the entrance? Feels odd to think we’ve been walking around your house for the last several hours and no one’s stopped us. We were expecting hostile pokémon here.”

“Oh, we’re not hostile. No!” The ponyta shook her head. “We are called Ponies; equines of the West Tellusian Herd that form the great nations of Equestria and the Crystal Empire. As to why we’re here it's complicated. I’ll explain everything in time, but you must understand we didn’t intend to be uncharitable and not be here to greet you. We had no idea when you’d arrive given how distant your town is from here. It must have been quite the journey getting here without teleportation.”

Indeed it had been, though they at least were able to rely on the newly-invented electric and steel-type pokémon amalgamated machine called a ‘klinklang train’ to travel part of the way.

“That’s a fair point,” Ebon responded, trying not to be too obvious as he tried pulling his knot out of Sike. “As you can see, you, uh, caught me at a rather… private time here, Miss…umm-”

“Right, my name!” The mare — at least Ebon assumed she was a mare because of her voice — drew herself up importantly and sketched a bow. “Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, ruler of the Crystal Empire and Element of Love at your service. But please, call me Cadance.”

“Hold up!” Edelweiss butted in. “Sike, that stone you found is pink like this ponyta’s fur. You were right about it not being poison. It’s actually love!” Edelweiss pressed against her paws against her furry cheeks. “Awwwwwwwwhhhh!”

Ebon shut his eyes again. Will the embarrassment ever end?

Sike pulled the stone from his chest fluff and held it up for the room to see. “You think this stone made what we did happen?”

“Oh, don’t think that, Miss Sike,” Cadance said consolingly. “It didn’t make anything happen you didn’t otherwise want. It merely amplified the love each of you feel for each other so you could more easily express it. It’s also proof positive that your kind are harmonious beings!”

“Harmonious beings?” Glassie chimed in with a glance at Edelweiss. “You’ve clearly never faced us in battle!”

Ebon found his voice again. “What do you mean by harmonious, Cadance? Aren’t you a pokémon like us? I’ll admit, I’ve never met a ponyta that looks like you before. You’re not even a fire-type!”

Cadance blinked and shook her head. “A fire-type? It’s my turn to admit ignorance of such terms, I’m afraid. I am an Equestrian pony — an alicorn, to be precise — and I’m a traveler from a different dimension.”

“Oh heck. Oh crap!” Edelweiss ran to the window and looked nervously out it. “If Palkia finds out you’re here, he’s going to end up blaming our team for it! This always happens!”

Cadance grimaced, leaving Ebon guessing that the conversation wasn’t going the way she’d wanted. He suddenly wished he’d turned right around after finding the pink stone and just spent the next month or so endlessly studding his three teammates.

“You’re all the first pokémon I’ve met who can talk. No ‘Palkia’ or anypony else has come here to cause trouble,” Cadance explained. “I’ve encountered pokémon in the wild and tried to bring harmony to them using a second Crystal Heart I fashioned before taking the portal to your world. It was no use, though. All they seemed to want to do is attack us mindlessly. Sadly, we’ve had to knock several of them out lest they injure our exploration teams with their powerful magical abilities.” Cadance hung her head. “I am truly sorry for injuring your kind.”

Ebon gave a guilty thought at the miltank sausage in his stomach. “It’s no problem at all, Princess. We’re not entirely sure why some of us can think intelligently and why the rest of us can’t. Rest assured, we’ve had to knock out quite a few ourselves and we don’t hold a grudge.”

“Violence is the one true law in Pokémon World, Princess Cadance,” Glassie said gruffly. “It makes us all equal under our God, Arceus.”

“I see. Then perhaps I should speak to your god sometime, Miss…” Cadance searched for the name.

“The name’s ‘Glassie’, Princess, and unfortunately we can’t help you there. No one’s seen Arceus in ages. Keeps to himself; lets pokémon do the work of managing the universe he created while he presumably creates more.”

“Interesting…” Cadance looked contemplative for a moment. “We both have a great deal to discuss and now probably isn’t the best time but…”

“B-but what?” Sike finally chipped in, giving her an askance look.

“I-I just couldn’t help myself but come,” Cadance’s voice was quivering with emotion. “I had to see such potent love expressed for myself. Perhaps it is a weakness of mine, but sometimes, I get a little carried away.”

Glassie and Edelweiss smiled at her. Ebon grimaced and Sike grunted as his penis finally popped out of her, splattering the floor loud enough to be heard by all with the mingled scent of their lovemaking.

Even though they all blushed, Cadance merely smiled. “Ah, yes. Perhaps a bath is in order for you two before we discuss why I’ve asked for you to come. And some proper bedrooms to sleep in. I daresay you’re hungry as well after coming all this way, too. We can talk about our respective peoples along the way. Come, enjoy our hospitality!” Cadance turned on her tail, the foursome following her out with all their belongings into the hall in the formation they’d entered in.

It might have been his mind playing tricks on him but Ebon couldn’t help but see the feminine entrance beneath her three-toned yellow, pink and purple tail wink occasionally as she walked.

Whoa… did we turn her on? Did I? The umbreon allowed himself a moment of pride in both his lovemaking and its effect on others — even those not of their realm — as the five climbed yet another set of gray stone steps.

Ponyta Pass

35th floor

They’d spent nearly the entire climb talking and even now Ebon still had questions, least of all was how they were speaking the same language, albeit with vastly different dialects.

The gist of what he’d gathered from the winged pony was that the dimension she’d come from was dominated by a small number of so-called ‘nations’ that governed the affairs of everyone living there. This was vastly different from the heavily decentralized confederated states that pokémon lived under, filled with tribal nations, microstates and vast swathes of wilderness set between them.

The pony race to which Cadance belonged was made up of four subgroups of pony: unicorns who had horns, pegasi and bat ponies who had wings and earth ponies who lacked both wings and horns but possessed great strength and hardiness.

While no one in Pokémon World possessed the means to dominate the planet, aside from the Legendary Pokémon, huge wars followed by lengthy periods of peace saw the races of “Tellus”, the planet Ponies came from, fill in the unexplored parts of their world before seeking out new races to develop relations with through interdimensional travel. Their stated goal was to share their message of cooperation and goodwill with the goal of achieving Harmony for all.

It all sounded quite high-minded to Ebon, but he had to admit the technology this ‘Princess’ had used to reshape this forsaken wilderness into a palace was beyond his reckoning. Maybe she was right and this ‘harmony’ ‘peace’ and ‘tolerance’ thing could make things better for the pokémon?

Maybe life didn’t have to be endless fights over food and shelter. Ebon thought of the klinks and klinklangs that drove the train he’d traveled in, happily performing their one and only job until their gears wore out but otherwise living in safety. He was sure pokémon like them would love living in such a place.

Maybe it was just him, but he kind of liked his peace and quiet and didn’t want to be told what to do by others; his sister serving as but one example of the consensus being wrong in his eyes. Many pokémon shared his sentiments, and he couldn’t imagine all of them going along with the pony way of doing things.

But he’d told his team they would treat this mission as if they were diplomats, and so he listened attentively to the pony Princess as they walked together.

And like any good diplomat, he was sizing up this pony as a potential rival, carrying on a constant conversation with Sike through telepathy.

What's the verdict on this pony's typing, Sike? Ebon asked. She looks kind of like she's from Galar.

Heaven's no, Ebon! Sike replied. Galarian Ponytas can read minds too. And this Cadance is far too large and powerful to be a ponyta. She looks more like a rapidash than anything. Whoever named this dungeon made a serious categorization error, I think. There was silence along the psychic connection before Sike continued. But I digress. Cadance is... quite the mystery. Her power is reminiscent of that of fairies but less chaotic.

That doesn't tell me much, I'm afraid, Ebon replied, hoping he didn't sound too insulting. Would Sike be able to deduce the intent of speech easier through psychic connections than with natural speech or would she deduce layers of mendacity in his words even he wasn't conscious of expressing? Not that you aren't doing your best, Sike!

Sike made a cute little psychic giggle, alleviating Ebon's concerns. You're so thoughtful, Ebon! The only thing I can say with certainty is Edelweiss is right in her guess about Cadance's power being tied to this stone I found. Whether it is love or not, I find it benevolent and comforting. What she can do with it will take more time to learn. I must be careful how far I dig into the mind of a powerful creature, lest she discover what I'm doing and thump me! Scratch that. Thump all of us!

Ebon silently appreciated the fact that while Sike might not be the best fighter, her aversion to conflict made her a practical spy. Wise choice, Sike. I think our best option for the time being is to try to get the ponies to reveal their abilities as much as possible while still being friendly to them until we can understand their limitations. I know if I were her, I'd be doing the same thing to us.

Remarkable as the Ponies’ renovation had been, Cadance hadn’t accounted for factors like the hallways throughout her massive palace randomizing every time a guest showed up — completely changing the interior spaces as all mystery dungeons do. As a result, most ponies stayed close to the upper chambers of Ponyta Pass and left the lower floors alone. That explained the lack of attention earlier.

It also explained why Cadance was so sweaty after all the walking they’d done and had just as much trouble navigating the twisting corridors and dead-end rooms.

“Whew! This place is huge but we’re almost there, I promise.” Cadance pointed to a distant room at the end of a long hallway. “The rooms on floor thirty-five and above don’t move. There are warm baths, latrines and as many clean towels as you can ask for. I daresay we brought too many.”

“You are too kind, Princess.” Edelweiss bowed respectfully. “Now I think about it, I’ve never seen you take a warm bath, Glassie. That won’t hurt you, will it?”

“Seriously? I’ve been blasted in the face with more flamethrower attacks than I can count. No bathtub could ever hope to vanquish ‘The Glass Cannon!’” Glassie struck her favored skorupi pose once more. “But in all seriousness, I could get sick if I stayed in heated water long enough. For an ice-type, I’m about the most resistant to heat-related sickness there is since, as an eeveelution, I still thermoregulate. Another mark in the win column for the ever-adaptive eevee.” She puffed her chest out in pride.

“So I’ve heard!” Cadance looked at Glassie, nodding. “We’ve learned a lot about what sorts of conditions the native life of Pokémon prefer and done our best to cater to their needs. We’ve even developed quite a taste for the local food. It agrees with us quite well as we ponies are natural vegetarians.”

Ebon looked up at the taller mare and nodded. “So you really are cultivating your own seeds and berries here. The formidable stores you had downstairs hinted you were far more than mere scavengers.”

“Not anymore, no,” Cadance replied. “But we were surviving on assistance from Equestria for years before we could start producing our own food while still remaining inconspicuous. Once we concluded the creatures here couldn’t be tamed, I sent out agents to learn more about the world and discovered civilized towns and cities. We then disguised ourselves and integrated into pokémon society to study it.”

Ebon exchanged a look with his teammates. This isn’t just some random human-turned pokémon intrusion. It sounds to me like an alien invasion! I better keep my eyes on these ponies. “How many of you are here? Are there more of you coming?”

“Not unless you ask!” Cadance said cheerfully. “That’s why you’re here. So we can finally speak to each other as equals. Forgive our intrusion on your lands. Our secrecy was an attempt to not disrupt life in your world.”

Ebon shook his head. “And you’ve asked for us, an exploration team, to speak on behalf of all pokémon? That doesn’t sound very fair, Cadance.”

Cadance look down at him and frowned. “Why do you say that, Ebon?”

“Because I’m not in charge of anyone outside this team of mine. They are my whole world and the reason I exist. But no one in Kanto, Sinnoh, Alola, Galar, Johto, or every other continent ever commissioned me to speak on their behalf. I would be doing them all a disservice to suggest my interests are the same as theirs.”

“I see…” Cadance looked crestfallen.

Ebon felt a leafy tendril worm its way around his abdomen, compelling him to stop walking. “Edelweiss, what gives?”

When he turned to her, he froze, for Edelweiss looked downright furious. “When we were outside earlier, you said we weren’t going to treat this like an ordinary dungeon but a diplomatic mission! Now all of a sudden you can’t speak for other pokémon?”

“Yeah, sure I said that!” Ebon told his sister. “I couldn’t be sure if hostiles were waiting inside or interdimensional ponyta — er, ponies.”

“I’m pretty sure all those pokémon in Kanto, Sinnoh, Alola, Galar, and Johto would have appreciated the fact you were thinking ahead and not starting wars with powerful creatures that can travel across dimensions seemingly at will!”

Glassie nodded, apparently enjoying the show by the look on her face. “She’s got a point, you know. Ebon Umbreon: Career Diplomat. Has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?”

“Imagine if the first intelligent pokémon Cadance met were those baddies who robbed my house!” Sike trembled. “Cadance would probably have declared war on us! The incident with the Time Gears was bad enough, thanks!”

“Your friends seem to think you’d make a great representative of your race, Ebon, and I have to agree.” Cadance put a wing over his back, it was large enough to drape over his entire body like a tarp. “You don’t always ask for leadership or authority, young umbreon. It wasn’t until I evolved when I finally realized that.”

Ebon blinked. “You… evolved?”

She smiled again, closing her eyes at what seemed to Ebon a pleasant memory. “It’s very rare in ponies but it’s true. When it happened, I gained the ability to fly as well as channel the power of love. Before then, I was just an emotionally confused teenager who kept being force-fed the feelings and emotions of everypony I came into contact with.”

Ebon couldn’t imagine how traumatizing that would be. At least Sike was able to turn her powers on and off. It was a wonder Cadance wasn’t a mental disaster after what had happened to her. Now that he thought of it, that pink stone Sike found wouldn’t likely have been placed where they’d found it by intent. Might Cadance have produced the stone as an incidental by-product of her magic? Her power would have to be staggering to pull it off, on par with the Creator Trio themselves!

“Like a psychic-type…” Sike muttered, then she froze. “C-can you read thoughts too, Princess?”

Cadance smiled as Ebon’s eyes went wide–had she been reading his earlier thoughts, both when he’d been ogling her and trying to categorize her type? “My abilities are more empathic than telepathic. I can read the emotions of all of you easily enough, but not your thoughts. Thankfully, I’m not a teenager anymore and can control my abilities much easier. It took a lot of time and patience to master, though. Another, far older alicorn named Celestia was a huge help there.”

Ebon could see the team had accepted him as being some sort of ambassador or pokémon kind but it still seemed implausible. “I get what you’re saying, Princess Cadance. But do you all think I could or should be doing this? We are not on the same level of power as you and hold no positions of authority. Were there no legendaries you could speak to instead?” he asked her earnestly. “Given your resources and influence, one could easily have sought out pokémon with a lot more recognition than me.”

Cadance appeared caught off guard by the question and removed her wing from his back. “Now that you mention it, yes. I did attempt to contact others. Pokémon spoke of many champions of your race but those who answered our summons were more interested in fighting us than speaking with us. By the sun itself, we had emissaries almost killed just for saying ‘hello’!”

“Oof!” Glassie exclaimed. “That sounds pretty believable, alright!”

“And after all of that, you still want anything to do with our species?” Ebon shouted, a bit louder than he intended to. He felt his face begin to flush again as all present looked at him. “Um, sorry. Got a little carried away.”

“Yes, Ebon. We do.” Cadance replied soothingly. “And that is why I am engaging you this time. So-called ‘average’ pokémon such as yourself have been far easier to deal with than your ‘leaders’ who seem more content with hiding themselves away behind endless hallways than trying to make life better for everyone. And having observed you, I believe you four particularly are a good match for the mission I have in store for each of you.”

Ebon’s ears perked up at that, as did those of his teammates. “A mission?”

Cadance nodded. “We can go over the details later, but I intend to send you to my homeworld to collect certain tokens of affection from the ponies starting tomorrow… if you accept my offer, that is.”

Ebon rubbed his chin. A client from another dimension asking for him to do a job? This could only be ridiculously hard. But hadn’t his team openly said they wanted more of a challenge, at least according to Edelweiss’s note he’d read all those months ago before they’d set out for points unknown? If he had to be honest with himself, this was a task they would be up for, even with the possible dangers, and they desperately needed resources to get back home.

Especially if they were going to ride the train in first class again. And pay for all the alcohol the four were going to drink after this.

The group started to walk again.

“And if we succeed, what then?” Ebon asked Cadance.

“You will be well-compensated for your time, of course. I have collected some pretty valuable treasures in all the time I’ve been here. Even visited a number of mystery dungeons so we have money to offer as well,” Cadance replied, then her voice turned something close to coy.

“But there’s a treasure more valuable than I can possibly offer waiting for each of you in Equestria. This I promise you!” The Princess of Love winked at Ebon.

“Let me guess… love?” Edelweiss asked in a coy tone of her own.

“A chance to prove myself worthy in honorable combat?” Glassie added eagerly.

“I’d like to learn more abilities and become stronger!” Sike’s tail twitched excitedly as well.

“Yes, Edelweiss. Yes, Glassie. And most likely you will, Sike! I’ll have you know that Canterlot, Equestria is home to the finest magic school in all the realm. Even nicer than the ones in the Crystal Empire, I regret to say. It’s my intention to send you all there.”

“Why not send us to the Crystal Empire if that’s where you’re from?” Ebon asked.

“Because Princess Twilight is the Element of Friendship in our world. In that authority, she asks that all foreign visitors be sent to her and her five friends first before we allow them to roam free.” Cadance saluted another pony covered in a coat of steel from its hooves to its neck inside one of the rooms as they passed by. It saluted back.

Look, Sike. A steel-type earth pony! Ebon thought to himself.

Normal type, actually. Sike corrected him. This is really fascinating! Do you know what this means, Ebon? I don't fully understand it myself admittedly but it implies that ponies aren't defined by physical attributes the way we are. The fact they're normal means they have potential to learn many different abilities. Pretty versatile, huh?

Just like eevees! Ebon smiled as the pair continued their secret conversation. Say, Sike. I once knew an espeon guy who could converse with multiple pokémon at once through telepathy. Seeing as we're diplo-spies or whatever working on behalf of all pokémon, it'd be awesome if you could learn that too.

Definitely! Espeon nodded animatedly at Ebon. That could be a challenge to multitask like that seeing as I've only started using this skill but once you master the basics, the rest will come in time.

You've changed, Sike, Ebon replied. Your confidence is radiant!

Sike stuck her tongue out at Ebon. You and the Team helped a lot with that! This stone too. I feel like as long as I have this stone with me, I can accomplish anything! Sike's expression grew more cautious. But I shouldn't get carried away, huh? It will still take some time to learn, A week, maybe sooner? Hard to say.

It’s fine, Sike. We’ll all do our best and succeed. Ebon’s mind was immediately filled with the sound of Sike’s purring. Was that really a message you could send telepathically?

“That all sounds reasonable to me. What do you think, Ebon?” Edelweiss asked.

“I’ll let you know after I get a bath and take a very long snooze. After knotting Sike, I’m too tired to even eat at this point.” Ebon yawned.

“Understandable that you are exhausted. Do make yourself at home, Team Allure. I will speak to you all again in the morning.” Cadance separated from the group and made for a nearby staircase. “The doors trimmed in gold are spare rooms. The one trimmed in quartz is the bathroom.” She yawned loudly. “I could use some sleep too. If you get hungry, the dining hall is just up this set of stairs. Sleep well and see you in the morning.”

The four were left outside the door to one of the rooms.

Ebon pushed open the door to one of the bedrooms and the four of them gasped.

“Wow!” Edelweiss exclaimed.

It was unlike any room Ebon has ever seen before. The yellow walls, pink floor and purple ceiling were made of solid crystal matching the pattern of Cadance’s mane and tail. There were other smaller doors with what he guessed led to closet space. The room had no visible lamps, lanterns or fires. The entire room itself seemed to give off its own radiance. A matching tick-tocking wall clock read 10:25 PM.

“Wow, look at that… I would have been happy with hay on the floor!” Sike walked up to one of what appeared to be a box made of cloth and pressed her paw against it. It yielded easily to her touch. “It’s so soft and looks so comfortable! What do you think, Glassie? Glassie!”

Glassie was nowhere to be seen.

“I’m in here!” a muffled call came back.

The three looked at the source of Glassie’s voice, which seemed to be coming from a large black rectangular box humming softly against the wall. When Ebon opened the door, he was greeted with a green paw clasping a fudge-coated ice cream bar. “A walk-in freezer! This is the best dungeon ever!”

Ebon laughed, watching Glassie chow down on the icy treat with gusto. “Don’t ruin your breakfast with too much midnight snacking! We’ll pack all our stuff in here in the morning when we’re all a bit more awake.” Ebon threw the explorer’s bag up onto the single bed — effectively calling dibs on it — relieved to be rid of his burden. “In the meantime, let’s hit the showers, everyone!”

A chorus of “me first” went up from all present and scrum followed by a brief wrestling match formed at the door that Edelweiss won handily who cheated using her grassy tendrils.

“Stop her, Glassie!” Ebon called up from the floor he’d just been planted into.

Apparently, she’d selectively heard his instruction and laid down a track of ice on the floor which sent him and Sike falling over a second time as Glassie stuck her tongue out at the pair before disappearing behind the quartz-trimmed door and out of sight.

Another classic case of doglike eeveelutions conspiring against the catlikes! Ebon vowed to get revenge.

Despite his only half-feigned anger — he really did need that bath! — Ebon felt himself gently lifted off the floor with telekinesis. “Thanks, Sike. Looks like the two of them won this bathroom brawl. Don’t worry; we’ll be ready for them next time!”

“I guess we’ll have to wait until they’re done, huh? I was really looking forward to that bath.” Sike said grumpily.

“I’m sure there’s room for four in there.” Ebon nuzzled his friend. You know how to psychically pick locks?”

“Sure, but I can do you one better!” Sike replied, the pair sprinting the whole way to the quartz-trimmed door.

Ebon looked at the handle on the bathroom door, wondering idly what Sike had in mind for defeating it. The handle was conventional enough; a standardized long, steel wedge buried into the face of the door that would allow most pokémon to grip using whatever limbs Arceus gave them to open it.

He draped a leg over the handle and pulled down on it. The door didn’t budge. Looking closer, this particular door didn’t have a keyhole, meaning his idea of picking the lock, even assuming they had the tools and knowledge, was a no-go.

“Check this out!” Sike lay, rear-end facing the door, barely managing to slip her tail until the gap between the bottom of the door and the floor beneath it.

She then scooted herself back until her firm, juicy rump was plapped flush against the door. That was followed by a slapping of her tail against the inside of it, along with an uproar of eevees from inside the bathroom. But it was too late for them to respond as the door was pulled open from the inside — Sike grinning all the while like the liepard that ate the magikarp.

Glassie and Edelweiss were looking up from over the lip of the oversized, pearl-colored bathtub like curious eevees as the two intruders casually sauntered up the bathtub and jumped in with a loud splash.

Before anyone could say anything, Ebon pulled his sister into a deep kiss. And from what he could hear from behind him, Sike was doing the same with Glassie.

“Great entrance, brother,” Edelweiss said softly, her sultry gaze bringing his eeveehood out of hibernation once more. “Just one problem; you left the door open.”

Ebon licked the length of one of her ears before whispering into it. “Problem?”

Edelweiss giggled and passed him a bottle of what smelled like shampoo. “The only problem here is you, stinky! You can have fun with us tomorrow after a good night’s rest and thorough cleansing. If you get really lucky, you might even get a shot at studding that pretty, pink pony Princess!”

Ebon gave his sister a good-natured splash of soapy water as he found his mind turned to the possibility of things turning sexual in Equestria. If ponies really are pokémon, and fit in the field-type egg class like ponytas do, we might be able to cross-breed. But an interdimensional being that’s reproductively compatible with an eevee? There’s no way Arceus would allow it!

*****

Ebon’s eyes fluttered open, wrapped up in his sister’s vines atop their unusually tall but cozy bed while Sike and Glassie had taken up residence in the room next door.

As soft as the light of the room was, he wished it weren’t there to make him sleep much lighter than usual and obscure the time of day. He supposed it was still night, otherwise, Edelweiss would be soaking in the rays of sun pouring in from the large open window.

“Hey, sis.”

Edelweiss moaned softly and opened her eyes. “What?”

“I need to go for a walk.”

Edelweiss groaned her discontent. “Fine, but close the window before you go. Too cold!”

“Don’t let Glassie hear you say that,” he teased her before Edelweiss released him with a groan. He kissed her on the muzzle before hopping off the bed, closing the window, and walking out into the hall.

He wasn’t even sure where he was going. Halfway down the long hallway he’d walked in from, he realized he left his map along with all of his gear back in the room. Oh well. It wasn’t like he was going to get himself lost on a single dungeon floor.

Another steel-clad pony, this one unmistakably a unicorn, passed by him as he wandered the halls and caught his attention. She wore brightly-colored armor in the same pattern as Cadance’s mane. Even her exposed face, neck and fetlocks seemed to glow as if they were crystalline. “Trouble sleeping, sir?”

“A little anxious, I guess. That and I’m not meant to sleep at night.” Ebon replied.

“Your appearance gives some hint of that, sir,” the horned pony guard replied. “I daresay you were born under the influence of Princess Luna. She loves the night, too, and takes it upon herself to raise the moon every evening.”

She sounds like a very charitable lady. And possibly a dark type! Ebon thought. “She controls the entire moon? That sounds like a lot of work.”

“A labor of love, she calls it. I’m sure your Palkia feels the same way about it.” The steel-sheathed mare replied, offering him a brief grin.

“Maybe. I’ve never met Palkia and I hope I never do. Life has enough difficulties.” The mare looked back at Ebon with something like sympathy after he’d spoken.

Despite her pitying expression, Ebon suddenly worried he might be close to offering offense. “I mean no disrespect to you or our legendary protectors with my words but most pokémon, myself included, do not revere them the way you do the Princesses. They don’t speak to us as equals or have anything to do with us at all. When they do, they have sometimes-selfish motivations like you and I. They are examples in the sense that they are strong and all pokémon wish to be strong but they are generally not considered all good or bad. They’ll ruin your day if you make them angry though so avoiding most of them is a good idea.”

“I can’t even imagine…” The mare shook her head as she considered his words. “Is there anything I can help you with while you’re up mister…?”

“Ebon Umbreon at your service, Miss.” He bowed respectfully to the guard pony. “I could use some fresh air and moonshine. Do you have a balcony or anything?” Ebon asked.

“Private Strawberry Lemonade, Royal Guardsmare,” she introduced herself. Her armor clinked lightly as she bowed her head. “And as it happens, we have one on this very floor. Follow me, Sir Ebon.”

Sir…? He blinked at the formal term of address as the pony ‘guardsmare’ took him to an arched doorway leading to a stone balcony that looked out over the forest. There were chairs and a table set up along with what looked like some sort of pony board game being played on it. The pieces on one side were mostly white, the other side mostly black. It looked like white was winning because they had more pieces on the board.

“And there you are. I’ll be patrolling the halls if you need me. Have a good night, mister Ebon!” The pony smiled and left back through the archway.

“Take care, Strawberry,” he bore his teeth to her cheerfully as she left before turning to face the moon. He put his paws up on the lip of the balcony and looked down at the trees. They were moving gently from the chill breeze flowing down from the mountain. He could see through his keen night vision, feral pokémon scurrying through the trees, looking for something or someone to eat.

Given the deepening chill at that hour and elevation, he could also see his breath spill forth in gouts from his muzzle, though his coat was more than sufficient to keep him warm. The crisp, mountain air filled his lungs with a welcome freshness after nearly a full day indoors. The moon shone bright and clear in the starry sky; it beckoned him to announce his presence to the night. His red eyes facing the celestial body, he gave a long, cry up to the moon.

Seconds of echoes later, the forest below erupted into the song of many lonely cries from the ferals below. The poochyenas and mightyenas bayed back first before the vulpixes, fennekins, and nickits added their voices to the chorus.

Even a feral with seemingly no mind of its own holds a measure of harmony in its soul. The thought appeared suddenly in Ebon’s mind, leaving him wondering where it’d come from.

Ebon cried out again and again to feed the pokémon chorus, feeling every bit of the loneliness inside all of them as the moon slowly traversed the sky.

He then turned his head in surprise as another cry rang out behind him.

“Edelweiss?” He flashed his teeth at her. “When did you get here? How did you find me?”

“You left the map behind, silly!” She withdrew it from her chest fluff with a flourish and passed it to Ebon. “I guess that means I was technically in charge for a couple hours.”

“You were the one in charge earlier, when we were talking to Cadance.” Ebon stepped down from the guard rail overlooking the forest and laid down in a pony-sized chair, big enough to fit two eeveelutions side by side. Edelweiss joined him.

“I just thought you needed a bit of encouragement at that moment,” Edelweiss replied, teasingly.

Far from reassured, Ebon went downcast. “Yeah, I needed encouragement alright. I choked back there, and we both know it.” Ebon thought back to the note he’d read so many months ago from his sister just before they’d set off on their journey to Ponyta Pass. His team had been so bored of adventuring that they were near quitting and hadn’t even bothered to come to him and mention it.

Her expression softened. “Ebon, I know what you must have felt like back there. None of us expected to find interdimensional creatures inside of a mystery dungeon. We didn’t sign up for any of this.”

“It’s not just that, Edelweiss,” Ebon explained about the note she’d left and how it made him feel. She looked surprised that he’d remembered that particular at all but nodded along as he spoke.

“I hope you haven’t gotten any crazy ideas in your head about them trusting me more than you, Ebon.”

He exhaled heavily. “The thought may have crossed my mind once or twice, but that’s not what’s bothering me. It got me thinking about the time gears and Darkrai.”

Edelweiss nodded as he spoke. “We’ve got a very bad track record when it comes to visitors from other dimensions, sure enough. Do you not think Cadance is being truthful with us? She seems like a good ponyta — er, pony — to me.”

“I can’t find anything wrong with what she’s saying,” Ebon replied. “But I never really thought of myself as some heroic explorer. Everything that’s happened to us seems like it should have happened to someone else like Team Raider. And besides, if you’re a Princess of some vast pony kingdom, why not summon the saviors of Time and vanquishers of Darkness instead? Aren’t they more on your level?”

Edelweiss remained silent but continued gently stroking his paw with hers as he continued to rant.

“No one’s ever really heard of us and yet we were invited all this way. Do we truly deserve this honor? Am I capable enough to lead us through Cadance’s challenges, or am I going to be a disaster? We’ve been picking over the leftovers of far greater teams for so long. I guess when I read your note and then Cadance was standing there asking me to be the representative of all life on this planet, I lost my nerve.” Ebon rested his other paw atop Edelweiss’s, even though he also had to look away. “I’m sorry I let you all down back there.”

Edelweiss draped a pair of tendrils around the back of his neck, drawing him close until he had to meet her loving and patient gaze. “Listen, you haven’t let us down yet, Ebon. Not once in all these years. And we haven’t let you down, either. Sure, we’re not the flashiest team out there, nor the most celebrated. But we are the most alluring. It’s right there in the name!” she finished with a lopsided grin.

Ebon chuckled. “So, you think sheer eeveelution sexiness is going to win the day?”

“Couldn’t it, Ebon? I think you’re expecting the worst without also hoping for the best, and it's making you a nervous wreck…”

“My ears face backward for a reason, sis,” Ebon replied grimly.

“Because that which seeks to ambush the umbreon will always approach from behind,” Edelweiss finished for him. “I get it, brother. I’m not an umbreon but I understand your paranoia at least. We once greeted Dusknoir as a friend, after all.”

Ebon could hardly forget about the time he saw two pokémon kidnapped and brought to the future by one they’d both revered as a great hero.

Ebon lowered his voice to barely a whisper. “It’s not that I don’t trust our hosts, it’s that I don’t trust anyone right now. I think we need to send one last message to the folks back in Treasure Town before we set out tomorrow and not make it too obvious to our hosts what we’re doing. Tell them what we’ve learned about the ponies and what they might expect if they turn hostile. If they want our help, they can certainly grant us access to the kangaskhan statue one last time. If they don’t, we make a break for it.”

Edelweiss nodded. “I agree, but I think only one of us should go or they might suspect something.”

“Good thinking. We’ll send Sike down to do it. She’ll be able to sniff out a trap better than us if things go bad and flee to safety. I want us as near to full strength as possible if a fight does go down.”

“A solid plan,” Edelweiss approved and then looked up at the full moon. “Feeling any better now, big brother?”

Ebon turned his attention to the crying of the pokémon still going on all around them. “Now that we have a plan? Yes. I’m still nervous but nothing is going to change that until we’re out there making a difference.”

“We already have, Ebon. And tomorrow we have a chance to do even more good.” Edelweiss stood up and walked over to the railing, followed closely by Ebon who did the same. “Shall we say goodnight to our friends?”

“I think we should.”

The pair joined in the chorus of pokésong, Ebon drawing comfort from the sound of their cries that carried him back to bed with Edelweiss and into a restful night’s sleep.

Author's Note

It's so hard to trust outsiders when they seem to bring nothing but trouble. This Cadance lady seems pretty nice though. I have a good feeling there's going to be more sex where our heroes are going.

Edit 2/21/2024: Serious editing was needed here. I'm not proud of the mess I made in explaining Pokémon Typing applied to ponies. I never established when and how Team Allure learned the different pony races either. 2022 AJ Aficionado was clearly in a steep decline after two years of being a semi-famous horse writer.