A New Life

“I don’t care who you are or the reason, I don’t appreciate people picking fights with my staff.” The General says, as I follow him down the hall

“I know sir.” I respond. “I’m sorry for jeopardizing the mission.” I really do feel bad for snapping back there, guys like him just really get on my nerves. I mean, where does he get off saying that just because I casually enjoyed My Little Pony in the past that automatically makes me gay? I don’t have a problem with gays or anything, I just don’t like it when people tie it to your other interests.

“So where are we going?” I ask, knowing we still have about an hour and a half until I’m supposed to meet the team.

“It never hurts to be ahead of schedule,” he replies. “You were supposed to meet them at seven, but the reason was so they would know when they had to be ready. Right now everyone is in the mess hall eating breakfast. I’ll take you there and we can do a more casual introduction. Plus I want to see how the other recruits deal with a curveball.”

As we keep walking, we turn down a side corridor with two big doors at the end. The General flings them open without any hesitation, startling all the people eating inside. “Everyone, meet your final team member.” He calls out making most of the recruits choke on their food or drop their silverware.

“Wait, I thought he was coming at seven.” one of the female team members yells out. “You said we would have time to prepare.”

“I also taught you to always expect the unexpected, and never get too comfortable.” The General counters. “Everyone meet Anon Filler, he's the last recruit we’ve been searching for. Anon, why don’t you join everyone for breakfast before the mission briefing?”

I glance around the room at all the food these people are eating. Not an ounce of meat, they must already be preparing them for the food in Equestria. “I think that’s a great idea, General. Although I hope you don’t mind, I've recently taken up vegetarianism.” I joke, giving the General a small grin.

“Haha..” the General lets out a small laugh before speaking. “Yes, I think that is quite alright. Just grab a try and head over to the counter over there, then just pick out whatever you want. Now I must be off, I’ll see you all at the rift later!”

I was expecting a unanimous “yes sir!” or something, but instead it’s just a series of murmurs like “okay” and “yeah whatever”. I suppose that makes sense given the fact that these people aren’t allowed to have any proper military training.

I walk over to the line, grab a try and tell the guy behind the counter to just give me whatever he recommends. He gives me the three most popular items and sends me on my way. I walk over to a table with only two other people, a guy and a girl, who are just eating in silence.

“So, you're the new guy.” the girl says, scooting over to sit in front of me.

“Fresh produce.” the other guy says, also scooting over next to the girl. “So, where did they find you?”

“Uh, my front door.” I say, not knowing how else to respond. “A recruiter just showed up at my door with a test. I thought it was just going to be some annoying core that interrupted my day off, but…”

“But then he said you were perfect for the job?” the girl asks, cutting me off.

“Eeeyup.” I say taking a big bite of my apple, which earns me a laugh from both my table mates. “I had to pack up all my clothes in one night and then be up early enough to come here.”

“Yeah, most of us didn’t take it seriously and then they told us we were perfect and to get packed.” The guy informs.

“So, none of you tried to get in here?” I ask, trying to better understand how everyone ended up here.

“Not really.” the girl chimes in. “But that was kind of the point, right? Get people who have knowledge of the land and the people but aren’t trying desperately to get in? The test is even set up with subtle questions that only die hard fans can answer, that way they can’t try to act like casual viewers.”

“Wow, so that’s how they keep the weirdos from getting in here.” I say, finishing off my cucumber sandwich. “Oh, by the way what are your guys’ names?”

“I’m Marie.” The girl says. “This guy next to me is Marco.”

“Nice to meet you guys.” I say reaching out my hand.

“The Warden said your name was Anon right?” the girl asks, taking my hand, before Marco shakes it as well.

“The Warden?” I ask, confused by the term. After a minute it clicks in my head. “Oh, you mean the General?”

“Yeah.” Marco pipes up. “He’s the one in charge of keeping us here and in line. Because we’re ‘high value’, we’re not allowed to leave here.” as Marco finishes talking a loud bell rings over the intercom. “Well, looks like breakfast is over. You ready for the mission briefing?”

“Yeah.” I say standing up and dumping my tray in the nearest garbage. I follow my two new “friends” out of the mess hall and to another large set of double doors, this time though the doors open after one of the recruits puts their hand on a scanner attached to the wall.

“Welcome everyone!” a voice calls out as we all enter the room. Standing in front of a large round table in the middle of the room is a young woman in a white lab coat and a large pair of glasses. “Now, I know most of you all have heard this before, but some of you need a refresher and we have a new member. So today we’ll be going over the mission you’re about to embark on, one final time.”

We all take our seats around the table while the young woman stands at the head with a clipboard in her hand. “Okay, so as you all know you will be going and living in Equestria for the next five years.” I feel my heart twitch as she says that, but I keep my composure. “While living in Equestria you'll be required to live just like you do here, but while obeying Equestrian laws and customs. You are all being sent to different parts of Equestria to record different data, so none of you will meet after your initial entry. You will also be required to write a letter and send it back through the rift at the end of every month to update us on your findings and any changes you may undergo.”

“Can you elaborate on ‘undergoing changes’?” Marie asks.

“Yes.” the scientist responds. “We don’t really know much about Equestria so if the environment or food affects your health we’d like to know. Next are the basic rules. No foreign objects besides your extra clothes, no disrespecting the royals, no missing your monthly update by more than two days. If you do miss an update a team will be sent to confront Princess Celestia to confirm that you’re still alive. If you are still alive and have just chosen to ignore your duties, you will be marked as a traitor. And the last most important rule, absolutely under no circumstances are you to engage in intercourse with anypony. However for the purposes of research you are allowed to form relationships with different Equine species as long as they do not pass second base.”

“Now will you all follow me.” The woman walks out of the room though a different door than we came in and we all follow. We eventually come to a door with another set scanner, only this one has a fingerprint scanner, a retina scan, and a DNA scanner. The woman puts her hand on the outline, looks in the retina scanner, and places a strand of her hair in a small vial. After all the lights turn green the door begins opening.

“Everyone, welcome to the portal room.” the scientist says, walking into the middle of the room doing a small twirl. On her right is a big sporadically fluctuating blue rift surrounded by big machines to keep it stable.. On her left is a set of fifteen solid metal lockers. “If you all open your lockers you’ll find a quill. The quill is made from one of princess Celestia’s, or princess Luna's feathers and is enchanted so that whoever you address the letter to, once you sign your name at the bottom it will be teleported to the other person.”

We all rush over to our labeled lockers eager to see our new equipment. Surely enough when I open my locker, sitting inside is a small beautiful black wooden quill case. I open it up, and sitting inside is a perfect deep rich blue feather.