Bi, Bi, Bi My Darling

by Justice3442

Rating: mature
Tags: Sunset Shimmer, Self Insert, Profanity, Random, Sour Sweet, Romance, Equestria Girls, Porn, Sex
Length: 10044

Sunset Shimmer and Sour Sweet engage in a friendly competition. Very friendly.

Sunset Shimmer and Sour Sweet engage in a friendly competition. Very friendly.

Warning: Sexcapades ho.

Inspired by this picture by 3D4D.

Cover art by the‐butcher‐x

Published 2022-04-07 02:40:03 UTC
Last updated 2022-06-19 22:20:31 UTC

Gauntlet-erm-Panties thrown

“You seriously think you’re a bigger bisexual than me?” Sunset Shimmer said in an annoyed tone.

The words hung in the air echoing the statement declared just prior. Sunset sat at a wood grain table and nursed a steaming cup of a foamy beverage that smelt of coffee and cream. Meanwhile, the woman across the table from Sunset, her cup smelling of coffee and dark chocolate, smirked at her with a grin so smug even Sunset was a little impressed.

Sour Sweet replied, “Hey, word on the street is you know how to please the ladies but haven’t been paying too much attention to the boys. Like, you might as well start a carpet cleaning service.”

Sour Sweet wore her two-toned pink rose and flamingo hair, with a mint stripe was tied into a ponytail with a cherry hairpin. Her horizontal striped burgundy and rouge long-sleeved shirt hung loosely off her left shoulder. Set above light-cherry red freckles, her plum eyes focused on Sunset while occasionally glancing down at the drink in her hand before she took a sip.

To Sunset’s right sat a cerulean with a sea-green-tinge-haired woman with ashen skin. She coughed into her partially drunk frappé. This was followed by laughter that was a mix between pure glee and maniacal, her chest heaving under a black leather jacket and shirt the gradient of forest green leading into a neon green.

Sour Sweet flashed her teeth with her smile and motioned to the laughing woman, “See! Chrysi knows what I’m talking about.”

“That’s not fair!” Sunset insisted irately. “There’s my husband,” she said, counting a ‘one’ on her right hand. “Flash Sentry,” she added, counting a two, “then… um…” A bunch of guys who might get mad if I just offer up their names to this argument, she thought.

Her fiery locks of red and yellow hair cascaded down her back. Sunset had cured her nudity that morning by donning a black tank top, red leather jacket, and black choker. Notably, she also had applied dark eyeshadow. Eyeshadow that highlighted smoldering turquoise eyes over a tight frown that was fighting a smile given Sour Sweet’s quality burn down. Or, at least, that’s how Sunset saw it.

“HA!” Exclaimed Sour Sweet. “Now me, I’ve also fucked your husband.”

“I’m aware,” Sunset said as she glowered through the steam at Sour Sweet. “I was there for the husband fucking. You know… having sex with him and you.”

“Not that I’m usually one to judge,” Chrysi began, “But your type does fall a bit more on the curvy end,” she pointed out to Sunset. “I’m assuming Sour Sweet sucks down more wieners than a line at a hot-dog stand,” she added, throwing her own smirk into the ring.

“Ha haaaaa…” Sour Sweet replied sarcastically. “Why thank you, you heartless bitch,” she replied sweetly.

Sunset’s hard expression softened into a smile. “Okay, so you’ve fucked all your female friends?”

Sour Sweet’s eyes narrowed, “I don’t see how that’s relevant. Why? Do you fuck all your girlfriends?” she said, regretting the sentence the second it left her lips.

“Yes!” Sunset declared righteously.

Chrysi said nothing and instead sipped from her straw, a knowing smile on her face.

“Do you all mind?!” a woman, her skin the color of gray clouds, long hair, the color of butter, and amber eyes, the placement of ‘place first, measure never, good enough!’ “Some of us are trying to have breakfast here!” she said. Motioning to open space, a Muffin and cup of something hot was set to the left of her hand.

She wore a tan short-sleeved shirt that was open in the front exposing a white tube top that clung to her chest tightly. This was accompanied by a baby blue skirt with a bow on the back. She irritably kicked at the floor with yellow boots that were laced in the front.

“Oh, I’m sorry!” Sour Sweet began. “It’d be a shame if our interesting conversation caused you to choke on your food!” she hissed, emphasizing the end of the sentence.

“Wowie! Who peed in your cheerios this morning?”

Sour Sweet glared daggers then sighed, her expression softening. “Sorry! I’m just, you know, trying to have a conversation here!”

Sunset gave the woman a warm smile. “Sorry, D.H. We kind of forgot where we’re at.”

“It’s called a Café!” Sour Sweet informed. “It’s where you go to drink coffee, mingle with friends, and have private conversations.”

D.H.s shoulders dropped, as did her eyelids, “Alright, b-word, maybe you can have your private conversation at a private volume?!”

“Have you considered tearing the muffin in half and sticking both sides in your ears?”

“Sour Sweet,” Sunset began, “you know you’re going to ruin your chances if you start driving away all your potential partners.”

“Excuse you!” Sour Sweet exclaimed. “But I have standards!”

“Oh?” D.H. replied. “Word in the café is that you’re a dick-sucking slut!”

“I said PRIVATE!” Sour Sweet hissed out through clenched teeth.

A sky blue-skinned man with a burnt-orange mustache, short hair, and a brown apron over green clothes stormed up to the two tables. As he opened his mouth to speak, Chrysi produced a large, black leather wallet out of her black leather coat. “Hello!” she greeted as she unzipped her wallet, reached in, and produced several bills. “I am interested in buying this café!” she declared. “If it’s not for sale, then I’d like to buy everyone here another drink or confectionary and offer a large tip if you go away.”

The man eyed the bills for a second. Snatched them and practically skipped back to the counter saying. “Free drinks and breakfast for everyone here!” he shouted.

.Chrysi mumbled ,"مطعمي أجمل بكثير على أية حال"

A series of cheers went up amongst the café occupants.

“Alright,” Chrysi said to the women at the table and D.H. “You can all drop your practiced innocent looks and continue my morning’s entertainment.”

Doing the thing Chrysi said, Sunset spoke, “Sour Sweet, I don’t have a great idea of who you’ve slept with but maybe we can figure this out together.”

Sour Sweet gave Sunset a befuddled look and pointed to D.H. “Me making up with screw-ball eyes here or me making out with screw-ball eyes here?”

“Do people mention your fucking craptastic attitude?” D.H. asked. “Or am I the first to highlight your craptastitude?”

“No, I meant… Who’s the biggest slu- I mean bisexual!” Sunset said. Her eyes widened suddenly and she held up her hands for the two women to be silent while Chrysi chuckled and the two women shot each other dirty looks. “I have an idea!” Sunset declared.

“Ah, yes…” Chrysi purred. “A phrase that means my day will be far more interesting than normal.”

Sunset continued, “Starting now, you and I are having a bisexual off.”

Sour Sweet smiled wickedly. “Okay… what are your terms?”

Sunset thought for a moment. “Whoever fucks the most men and women wins!”

While already awash in attention in the café, the amount of attention focused on the area where the woman sat suddenly increased exponentially.

Sour Sweet simmered the idea for a few seconds. “What, like… in even numbers?”

“Well, obviously,” Chrysi said. “Or, something to that extent. Otherwise, you two would simply be having a slut off.”

D.H. attempted to stifle her laughter that came out in a giggling snort as Sour Sweet side-eyed everyone in the conversation.

Sour Sweet twerked her lips to one side. “Okay, what are we betting?”

“The honor of our labias!” Sunset declared.

Chrysi rubbed her hands together and motioned for the women at her table to lean in closer. All three leaned in close enough that their breasts pressed up against the woodgrain table and their noses several centimeters from each other, as D.H. scowled at them and went back to her breakfast. “This game has piqued my interest, so I’m willing to fund your sexcapades provided I have photo or video evidence of each encounter.”

“That would make us whores,” Sunset said dryly.

“Hold on, Princess Moneybags!” Sour Sweet said, holding up a hand. She turned to Chrysi “How much per John and Jane?”

Sunset winced.

“Will a smaller or greater amount help ease the conscience of Princess Moneybags?” Chrysi hissed.

“Uh, whores get paid by the person they’re having sex with,” D.H. pointed out. “If anything you two would be closer to porn stars with a sponsor.”

Everyone turned towards D.H. Chrysi glared, Sunset had a look of surprise, while Sour Sweet’s face read ‘kindly find a cliff and jump off it.’

D.H. pointed at her ear. “I have excellent hearing.” She winked in the direction of a table of confused patrons.

“Okay…” Sunset said. “I can work with that.”

“Okay,” Sour Sweet began, “but uh… how much are we talking here.”

Chrysi leaned in further, her large black belt and short black skirt appearing over the top of the table as her holy tights were exposed. She whispered a figure into Sour Sweet’s ear.

“I’m in!” Sour Sweet exclaimed as she raised a hand.

“Eeeeexceleeent…” Sunset purred as she produced her phone from a jacket pocket and began texting.

Sour Sweet locked eyes with D.H. Or rather, did her best to lock her eyes with one or the other of D.H.s. “Wanna hate fuck?”

D.H. swallowed. Catching a quick eyebrow waggle from Sunset, she answered, “Fine, you hateful cunt. I’ll have second breakfast out of that thing I just said.”

“Sweet~~!” Sour Sweet sang. She stood up and grabbed D.H. by the arm. “I call women’s restroom.”

“Okay!” Sunset said with a wave as she continued to type on her phone.

Chrysi squinted and tilted her head at Sunset. “What the heck are you doing?” She glanced around the Café. “You have a cavalcade of potential men and women who are draping you in bedroom eyes.”

“Oh, you know…” Sunset said. “Reaping the benefits of friends… with benefits.”

“Do you MIND?!” Sour Sweet’s voice erupted from behind the closed women’s restroom door. “I need those otherwise my fucking vag is going to be cold all day!”

“Would you stop your bitching and stop acting like the floor is lava!” D.H. replied from the same side of the door as Sour Sweet. She pulled off Sour Sweet’s burgundy skirt and tossed it on the far side of the toilet, missing the bowl this time. She had lucked out and managed to land Sour Sweet’s wine-red panties in the toilet.

Sour Sweet was now naked from her waist down to her thigh-high purple tights with hot pink straps and D.H. was now face-to-face with a pink pussy surrounded by lemony folds. Much to Sour Sweet’s surprise, D.H. leaned her face in close and began lapping at her vag, running her tongue up from the bottom, teasing the opening by folding her tongue and poking at the hole, before running it over Sour Sweet’s clit.

Sour Sweet began lightly moaning as D.H. licked up then all the way back down, then up again. Light moans turned into heavy moans as D.H. thrust a couple of fingers into her sex and began thrusting them in and out as she lapped at her clit. “Harder, bathroom slut!” D.H. demanded.

“Well, then turn around, bathroom whore!”

Sour Sweet grimaced with a small smile on her face and complied. D.H. was now facing two plump-round cheeks dotted with light-cherry red freckles. She attempted to get to her feet, which she managed, though not after awkwardly stumbling a bit and knocking Sour Sweet forward so she was now leaning over the toilet. Her hands gripping the seat as she stared into the waters to see her cherry-red panties at the bottom of the pot. “Christ, you’re a bitch!” Sour Sweet declared.

“Haha…” D.H. uttered as she used Sour Sweet's plump ass-cheeks to get steady again. “I know!” Leaning forward, D.H. inserted a couple fingers back into Sour Sweet’s pussy, then reached forward and snatched one of the woman’s arms.

Sour Sweet almost fell face-first into the, mercifully clean, waters below as she steadied herself with her left hand. “Whoa! What the fu—“ she moaned in pleasure rather than finish the sentence as D.H. continued to thrust two fingers in and out of her pussy while simultaneously bumping her hips against Sour Sweet's ass.

“Alright, if you want your panties back, you’re going to have to bob for them and grab them with your teeth!”

Sour Sweet’s brow tightened. “They’re at the bottom of the toilet! What? Do you have a snorkel up your vag-hatch?!”

“Like you would know!” D.H. exclaimed.

“Look… gunt… ah… I’ll get you off after this.”

“Damn right, you will!” D.H. said. “I’ve been doing all the work while you lose clothes in the fucking toilet!”

Sour Sweet thrust hard against D.H.’s hand, perhaps in anger, but the result was the fingers went even deeper than before and she felt her vision blur as the fingers brushed up against more sensitive areas inside. “Huh… huh… of God… Finger me harder!”

“Shake your freckled ass and maybe I’ll let you cum!”

Sour Sweet turned and glared. “Do you have to be a royal cooze? I’m close to cumming!” she cried.

“Yeah, well earn your slutty, whore café bathroom orgasm… uh… slut!”

“Maybe I’ll shake my ass if you get my panties for me!”

“Sure glad I can see secret messages in your ass-freckles!” D.H. replied. “Did you know when Mercury is in retrograde, you’re actually halfway worth talking to?”

“Did you know your parents never loved you and secretly hoped you would wander into traffic?”

“Hey! These freckles say you have a secret job as a knob polisher!”

“Listen, you Canterlot High hussy! My sex life… damnit!” Sour Sweet hissed out as she lowered her voice. “Your kind of right at this point… Whoa.”

Much to Sour Sweet’s surprise, she was allowed to stand back up. Immediately, she was turned around and sat back down on the toilet seat. D.H. was once again on her knees, this time spreading Sour Sweet’s and leaning her face closer to her two-toned bush and vag. “Try not to mess up your soaked toilet panties while I give you some lady head, okay?”

“Alright, bitch-slut!” Sour Sweet replied. “Get lick-ah!” D.H. was already going to town on her clit with one hand diving deep into the recesses of her cunt. D.H. sneaked her hand up Sour Sweet's shirt and began fondling her right breast through the fabric of her bra. “Cum for me, you bathroom slut! Cum!”

Rather than retort, Sour Sweet elected to lean her vag forward so D.H. had an easier time of licking her clit and pumping her fingers in and out of the woman’s sex. She could feel warmth and waves of pleasure build up bit by bit and then wave by wave until everything crescendoed into a tsunami of pleasure that rocked her body. A semi-opaque discharge squirted from her opening onto the face of D.H. who gleefully licked Sour Sweet’s fleshy bulb, rubbed her breast with her right hand, and thrust in and out of Sour Sweet’s vagina cavity with her left hand.

D.H. slowed down after a minute or two.

Sour Sweet huffed and puffed. Her deep breathing caused her breasts to heave under her striped shirt.

D.H. picked a wall next to the toilet and leaned her back against it as she sat down. “My turn!” she said, reaching her hands under her skirt and lifting her knees and butt slightly so she could take her canary yellow panties off.

“Hey, I should be doing that!” Sour Sweet declared.

“No way—AH!” Struggling to get her panties off in a sitting position, D.H. fell on her side. She quickly worked to remove the article of clothing. “You’ll just throw it in the toilet.”

“Well… wouldn’t you?”

“I’ve almost got them off! Just get down here with me!”

“Uh… Are you sure you don’t want to sit down?” Sour Sweet asked as she stood up and motioned to the now vacant toilet seat. A little liquid dripped down from the side of her thighs and hit the hot pink strap of her tights.

“I’m not going to use the same toilet seat as you!” D.H. declared as she triumphantly got her panties off her yellow boots and into a hand. “I might get hepatitis! Now stop acting like the floor is lava and get down here so we can scissor!” With that, D.H. threw her panties in a random direction, then let out a resounding, “Fuck!” as she heard a familiar plop of something light and made out of fabric landing in water.

Sour Sweet laughed. “Alright, spaz!” she said as she sat her naked ass on the cold, white-tiled floor across from D.H. and scooted herself forward. “Let’s do this!”

Gray legs wrapped over and around lemon legs as the two women pressed folds against each other and began rubbing and bumping. Small, soft groans turned into louder moans as the pink sexes continued to be slid up and down against one another.

“Oh, God!” D.H. said. “I never thought I’d lose my virginity in a public bathroom?!”

“Holy SHIT! What?!” Sour Sweet exclaimed.

“Kidding~~!” D.H. sang out. “Okay, gimme a bj! You owe it to me.”

Sour Sweet froze. “Uh… yeah… eat you out… that’s just… that’s just what I’ll do…”

-~O~-

Several minutes later…

“Ug… do you have clue one what you’re doing down there?!” D.H. asked. “Like… Yeah, I’m wet. You might want to stick your head in the toilet to re-hydrate, but you’re applying your tongue to me like you’re trying to paint my legs a different color.

“Shut up, alright!” Sour Sweet cried. “I’m trying to concentrate.”

“Well concentrate on my clit and stick a finger or two in me!”

Glaring and sighing, Sour Sweet raised her head from the thighs back up to D.H.’s pussy. She licked between her gray folds until she found a fleshy nub near the top of her vag. Obediently, she thrust a couple fingers into D.H.s pussy and began slowly moving them in and out.

“Faster and harder!” D.H. exclaimed.

Sour Sweet upped the pace.

“Faster and Harder!” D.H. exclaimed louder.

Sour Sweet groaned and picked up the pace of both her fingering and licking.

D.H. breathed in deep then let it out. She leaned forward and put both hands on top of Sour Sweet’s head and pushed her mouth and tongue down onto her clit harder. “Oh, I’m better at sex than you!” D.H. moaned.

Sour Sweet considered protesting, but D.H. had her face firmly pressed against the gray woman’s vagina and was roughly pleasuring herself with the lemon-colored woman’s mouth.

“Oh, I’m so much better at sex than you!” D.H. moaned.

“Oh, I’m so much better at sex than you!”

“Oh, I’m so much better at sex than you!”

“Oh, I’m so much better at sex than you!” With a final declaration and some vigorous push and pulling against Sour Sweet’s head. Her vagina walls contracted around the lemon-colored fingers and she felt even warmer and wetter below as pleasure cascaded through her body. As she climaxed, she suddenly pushed Sour Sweet’s mouth down off her clit and onto her opening where a rush of girl cummies rushed to meet the taste buds of the unexpecting woman.

D.H. rubbed her own clit to the sounds of Sour Sweet sputtering and coughing.

Sour Sweet looked up with a glare. A satisfied glare, but a glare nonetheless.

“Was it good for you?” D.H. purred.

“Go fuck yourself!” Sour Sweet declared.

“No, thanks! I’m good!” D.H. said. “You know… just kinda… did that with your face.”

Sour Sweet grumbled a few hate-filled slurs to herself and stood up. She walked over to get her squirt. “Fish our panties out of the toilet, would you?”

“No way!” D.H. said. “I got you to come waaaaaay before me! It’s your duty to retrieve our soaked underwear.”

“Sure glad you know all this etiquette about hate fucking in a public bathroom!”

“You get those panties out of that toilet one of you!” Chrysi exclaimed. “I don’t want you messing up my recently purchased bathroom.”

Sour Sweet and D.H.’s foreheads tightened as their eyelids dropped.

“Don’t tell me you actually purchased the whole café!” Sour Sweet said.

“Fine!” Chrysi replied angrily.

“She did! She did!” a cheery, peppy, unmistakably bouncy voice answered. “She totally just pulled out her checkbook and was like… Yeah, people are fucking in the bathroom! We can either do this the way where you gain money or lose knees. Your choice! And the guy picked the money and now we’re going to get Turkish coffee added to the menu! Hurray!”

“Okay, well now I don’t have to tell her,” Chrysi reasoned.

“Looks like Sunset’s friends are here…” Sour Sweet grunted in displeasure as she stuck her hands in the toilet and quickly fished out her pair of red panties and the yellow panties in one hand. She handed the soaking yellow ones to D.H. who grabbed them.

“Uh… thanks…” D.H. said as it dawned on her that she was probably going to go commando in a skirt for a little bit.

“DAMNIT!”

D.H. recoiled slightly. “What?!”

Sour Sweet sighed. “I need to record that we had sex somehow!”

“Oh, uh…” D.H. reached into skirt pocket and produced a smartphone. She quickly wrapped an arm around Sour Sweet’s shoulders. “Selfie!” she declared, taking a picture of the wall in front of her.

“Give me that!” Sour Sweet declared.

“Hey!”

“Look, I’m setting it to the right facing!”

“Okay, but ask first!”

“How do you see anything with a screen this cracked?!”

“I see just fine.”

“I think no one will be able to identify this finger after your screen fucks it up.”

“Just stop bitching and let me fix it!”

“I got it! Alright?!”

“Okay, give the camera to me!”

“No! Hold still!”

“Request denied!”

Sour Sweet snapped the picture just in time for D.H. to kiss her with lips still sporting the odd splotch and taste of her own sex. Examining the results, she could see that both women were sporting each other’s ejaculate on their faces. Not that their hair told a story of anything other than, ‘we got laid’.

It would suffice.

“Okay… lemme just…” Sour Sweet trailed off.

“Are ya done?!”

“Let me just send it to myself! You’ll even get my number! Don’t stalk me.”

“Sure, I know who to call for shitty head.”

Sour Sweet winced and gave D.H. an angry and hurt look.

“Uh… sorry… erm…” Her face blossomed into a smile. “It was really fun… I uh… actually really enjoyed pleasuring myself with your face.”

The irritable Sour Sweet grumbled out a “You’re welcome” followed by an “Erm… Thank you.”

“Yeah, no problem!” D.H. said as Sour Sweet handed the phone back to her.

Okay, so Sunset probably fucked at least one person in the men’s bathroom. She thought as she placed her hand on the knob of the door, turned it, and pushed it open.

And there, she saw it…

Sunset’s hair. Covered in cum.

Sunset’s cheeks. Also covered in cum.

Sunset’s cleavage, neck, and even clothes. Just… cummed all over.

Sunset’s turquoise eyes, blazing with determination.

Sunset sat triumphantly in a chair like it was her throne. Flanked by a blue-skinned man in a black trench coat with a dark-blue scale on it and a light red-skinned man in a red button-up shirt with brown, leather shoulder pads with green apples on either side.

On top of that, most of her friends seemed to be occupying the entire café!

Sour Sweet was going to have her work cut out for her.

Chrysi buys a Café

Chrysalis sighed as she watched Sunset gleefully swipe her finger and poke at her phone. “Seems I’m actually buying a Café,” she said in a vexed tone as she glanced up at the chapter title.

Sunset waved a hand around dismissively. “Just drop my name, you’ll probably get a discount.”

Chrysi fought the urge to bring up Sunset’s sexual history as a possible reason for her statement, “Hmmm... Saving the city benefits?” she ventured.

Sunset grinned wide, “Haahaahaheehe, yeah...” Her turquoise eyes darted to meet Chrysi’s green jade ones. “I was considering eating D.H. out before I was off to the races getting everyone here.”

Chrysi produced a checkbook with a dark lime green protective cover on it. “Everybody?”

“Ev-Ree-Bod-Eee!” Sunset stressed.

Chrysi squinted. “Let me add another zero to this proposed amount. I sense time is of the essence before your ‘modest proposal’ means martial law is declared on the city.” Chrysi twerked her lips and smiled wickedly. “Unless you need an elementary class on top o—”

“I want my baby-back, baby-back, back-back ribs!” Sunset sang to herself.

Chrysi visably gulped. “Yet another zero it is!”

“Joking! Joking!” Sunset said. “Also, talking about… you know… bay-bee.”

On that note, the front door to the Café was thrown open by a man with sapphire blue skin, deep-ocean blue eyes, and long crow black hair. A raven-pitch black leather Trench coat with belt fasteners hung loosely off his shoulders, ending a few centimeters from the ground near large, jet black boots that clanked with the ringing tones of metal against stone floor. Bolted onto the front was an inch-think large, chrome metal toe protector. Above those were black pants, a red belt with a red buckle, and a black t-shirt that sported a turquoise scale.

“Bae-beeee!” Sunset exclaimed in a high pitch tone that vibrated windows and glasses alike. She rushed over and hugged the new arrival, his was followed by a peck on the lips.

“أنتما الاثنان استيقظتا بجانب بعضكما لكن بخير,” Chrysi mumbled to herself.

“Hello, my sweet.” Justice greeted in a voice a bit deeper than his speaking voice, something someone might hear from a radio host or a man selling deodorant. “I am given to understand you’ve engaged in a competition in which you were called out for having a sexual history that rides like a slip-and-slide as opposed to the hot dog eating competition that your…” Justice trailed off. “Er… competition has engaged in,” he concluded, having quickly given up on finding an alternative word for ‘competition’.

Her arms still wrapped around his back; Sunset pulled back slightly. “Thank you for hitting me with the bus first thing in the morning,” she said with a terse smile.

“That’s not the first thing we did,” Justice said as Sunset’s smile turned smoldering. “The first thing we did was complain that the sun was out at such an ungodly hour, followed by me threshold carrying you to the bathroom so you could use it, followed by me using it, followed by me threshold carrying you back to bed.”

Sunset nodded, “Then further complaining about the sun.”

“And anything else that had gone wrong the day prior.”

“Angry about whoever is running this country.”

“’Into the ground’ is the end of that sentence.”

“Oh no!” Sunset exclaimed as she placed both hands on her cheeks in an exaggerated fashion, “We’ve become vaguely political!”

“Heavens! Everyone will be uncomfortable in the serene setting of this Café were everyone is looking at us!”

A voice erupted from behind the closed door of the bathroom. “Would you stop licking me knees!” D.H. shouted. “I promise you I bathed this morning!”

Justice’s eyes lit up. “Oh, hey! Dearest is here! Sour Sweet, tooIf today was actual about me getting laid as much as I wanted, I could add that delicious movie candy to that popcorn girl and munch for hours.”

Somewhere, someplace Juniper Montage realized she was missing out on something and exploded. Covering a Disney+ Princess streaming set with viscera and blood, thus forcing them to sell the whole kit and caboodle to Hulu.

“Just shut up and enjoy your knee-job!” Sour Sweet replied to D.H.

Chrysi smirked. “I take it she’s licked your knees a few times?”

Justice glanced down. “You could eat a meal off of them.” He crained his neck. “Uh, the back of ‘em.”

“Hmmmm... Sushi...” Sunset hummed.

From a booth with Tree Hugger, Gizmo, and, Sandlewood, Micro Chips exclaimed, “Eat sushi-off-Justice’s—aaaasssss!”

“Aquire sea bass,” Added Gizmo.

“Pilfer life from ocean,” quipped Tree Hugger.

“Uh… insert line here!” cried Sandlewood, realizing the reader’s attention was now on him.

“You’d think my baby would be sick of fish,” Justice quipped as he scanned the Café as if the statement might land him in hot water.

Sunset, for her part, did the same, “Not at all. I love sea food,” she said, running a finger alongside the side of his face.

Chrysi placed an elbow on the table and leaned against her fist. “You might have to spell that ‘sea’ for me.”

“Chrysi!” Justice exclaimed as if he had just noticed the Ashen skinned, cerulean haired beauty. He bounded up excitedly as she extended a hand, which he accepted in his own as he curtsied and kissed a large golden ring that glittered with emeralds which surrounded a jade stone that was about as big as the rest of the ring. His eyes lingered on a bronze watch with a red and black face that whirred with tiny gears and gyro scopes under the second, minute, and hour-hand set in front of two subdials.

The watch looked like it cost more than the building they were standing in.

“My eyes are up here,” Chrysi purred.

Justice’s ocean blue eyes met Chrysi’s jade ones as they shared a smirk and released hands. “So, exactly what trouble has our girl got us into this time?”

“Oh, not just her... I’m helping.”

“And the world weeps!” Sunset exclaimed.

“Right, but I have one text that read’s ‘Get to the Café now! I have a mighty NEED!’ and another that reads ‘Sunset challenged a cock-sucking human sized piece of candy to a bisexual off. Equip as necessary.’ Which, like... one might assume that’s enough to go off of, but I thought you might mean a literal, animated piece of candy. Magic shenanigans, you know?”

Sunset nodded, “Word. Word.”

“So, I brought a bottle of water, a bottle of something, er... a bit thicker, yet water based. And a box full of fun things.” He sat down at the table, setting down a metal attache case. Sunset sitting next to him and motioned for both the women at the table to lean forward. “In this case, I mean sex toys. But I’m packin’ just in case the presumably candy monster turned out to be hostile or like... straight or whatever.”

“Justice,” Chrysi said.

“Not that there’s anything wrong with straight people!” Justice stressed. “I just don’t know how potentially off-kilter the, presumably, Equestrian ‘Some old wizard or maybe Celestia herself just dumped a bunch cursed magical items on this side of the portal because, ‘Ef it! It’s the neighbors problem now! Maybe if they actually knew how to neigh we’d give a fuck.’”

“Uh... Justice?” Sunset said.

“Was that too speciesist?” Justice asked. “It sounded a bit speciesist.”

“Justice!”

“Yessum?” Justice said, finally settling down enough to stop his word-alanche.

Sunset took in a deep breath and let it out, “You were in a car with Pinkie, weren’t you?”

As if summoned, the door once again opened and Pinkie Pie bounced into the Café, threw a hand up into the sky, and rang out a chipper, “Hiiii-eeeee!” A small, white tank top bearing Pinkie’s cutie mark of two baby blue balloons flanking a single yellow one also bounced, or rather, jiggled as the woman bounded. A short-sleeved, denim half-jacket framed the balloons over her exposed belly bottom and shorts, the color of pink taffy, with two maroon suspender straps that hung loosely on either side of her thighs.

“Pinkie!” Justice said excitedly.

“Justice!” Pinkie replied, matching Justices enthusiasm. The two bounded up to one another and hugged as if they hadn’t seen each other for a long time, let alone had just shared a car trip together.

“Am I here in time?!” Pinkie asked. “Where’s that sexually active candy monster?!” she asked licking her lips.

“Uh, said monster is actually Sour Sweet, it would seem,” Justice informed.

“Whaaaaat?” Pinkie cried in protest. “That’s not fair, I was ready to rock-&-roll!” she announced.

“I mean...” Sunset flashed Pinkie bedroom eyes. “That’s very much on the table, still.”

“Sunset!” Pinkie shouted.

“Pinkie!” Sunset shouted back. As Pinkie detached from Justice, Sunset stood up and ran over, jumped, was caught as she wrapped her American thighs around Pinkie’s waist. “It’s so good to see you...” Sunset said gently as she closed her eyes and hug tightly.

Pinkie slowly lowered Sunset back to her feet. “Ooof… she’s a big girl…”

Justice and Crysi snickered.

Pinkie broke a hug with Sunset and nodded. “We got here as fast as we could. Well not as fast-fast as we could.”

“I suggested we travel by cannon! Or maybe catapult,” Justice said. “Or –”

“He did!” Pinkie confirmed. “And I was like, ‘Justice! That’s not going to work! The cannon is in Equestria –I mean, I’m a normal girl that doesn’t switch places with my pony doublewho screams and hides whenever she sees me in my human form for some reason!–

“–you know, trebuchet –”

“And, like, we’d have to build a catapult or various other types of siege weaponry –”

“–such as a ballista. You know... something to send us very far, very fast!”

“– And that’s going to take more time than driving there!”

“Or maybe just... a giant slingshot like they have at fairs.”

“Uh, Pinkie? Justice?” Sunset interjected.

“–And then I was like, who’s driving? ‘Cause the environment isn’t just going to fix itself, you know?”

“And then, I suggested we could probably find a fair that would have something to launch us off in the right direction if we unbuckled at the right moment.”

“’Okay, but the Café is probably closer to us than any fairs!’ I told him.”

Annoyance began to tug at Chrysi’s features, “Uh... Pinkie and Justice?”

“So then, Pinkie checks her phone,” Justice said.

“So, I checked my phone!” Pinkie exclaimed. “And there’s like... No fairs around here for a few counties! Can you believe it?! I mean, Justice believed it...”

“Believe it! So, I asked Applejack, you know... the landowner who manages migrant workers.”

Sunset’s eyes lit up. “Like slaves!” she suggested.

“Uh-huh!” Pinkie and Justice agreed with massive, twisted smiles on their faces.

“اللهم امين,” Chrysi uttered as she smahsed a palm against her face.

Justice continued, “So, I asked her if she knew where the nearest country fair was, and then, Big MacIntosh, you know, the landowner and head slave walloper –”

“Uh-huuuuuuh!” Pinkie and Sunset nodded, their smiles twisting further and further from pure joy into something of devilish intent.

“–accused me of being an ignorant city kid, and then Applejack raddles off about three country fairs that are within an hour or two drive of us.”

“And Big MacIntosh,” Pinkie continued, “Was like, ‘Fuck it! I’ll drive if you both will just shut up’, so then Applejack was like ‘What did I do?’”

“Right,” Justice agreed, “So then Mac was all, ‘Not you, I’m talking to Tweedle-insane and Tweedle-insaner!’ And I start laughing, ‘cause what a burn down.”

“And then I paused, ‘cause wait... Which one of us is which?! Which I asked –”

Chrysi groaned, raised her ashen wrist, and quickly undid her watch. She held it up for Justice to see. “I will give you this if you get her to shut up and join her in the shutting up.”

“Oh, shiny!” Justice marveled. Staring at the watch rather than accepting it as payment for future tasks rendered.

“‘Which one of us is which?’ And then Big Mac kinda growled at us and then Applejack used her powers to just pick all three of us and then I was like ‘Wheee! Surprise group hug!’ and then Justice put his head on Big Mac’s shoulder and said, ‘You smell nice!’ and then Big Mac got confused and like... slightly redder and then I start smelling Big Mac and I’m like ‘He DOES! Smell good!’”

“And then Applejack walks over to the farm’s pickup truck. You know, the one that looks like it’s about a hundred years old!”

“Dude! It’s gotta be!” Vinyl Scratch quipped.

“And she sort of does that thing where you’re carrying a bunch of groceries in your arms, but you have to open a door, so you kinda shuffle everything into one arm and awkwardly hold it while you struggle with keys and try to open a door, and like... We could have taken her Beamer, but it was a couple yards farther away –”

“And then she got the door open and basically carries us all inside, accidentally bumping Big Mac’s head on the door!”

“As well as accidentally emasculating him,” Justice said as his eyes darted to collect a light-red finger aimed in his direction, “Applejack reminding her brother that she was now the strongest of the Apple family!”

“Right! So, we’re all cozied up on the bench seat! Me, Big Mac, Justice, then Applejack, who’s driving!”

“And I’m like...” Justice looking to his left and his right like he was a kid in a candy store. “Whose thighs do I rub while we’re together on this micro road trip?”

“And then Justice picks my left thigh and Applejack’s right! His arm stretched across Big Mac’s stomach.”

Big MacIntosh exclaimed, “While Ah was figuring out how the seat belts was gonna work!”

The group turned to the table next to them where Big MacIntosh and Applejack sat. Their expressions a mix of amusement and annoyance.

Big Mac’s emerald green eyes drifted from Justice to Chrysi then to Pinkie Pie above dark freckles on his light red complexion. His orange hair was spiked in the front and almost down to his shoulder in the back. He wore his signature red delicious-colored western yoke with the brown leather shoulders over a plain, white t-shirt. A tawny-brown belt with a silver buckle held up his jeans over a pair of red tennis shoes that resembled Sunset’s red Converses. He leaned his cheek against his hand, perhaps suggesting he was bored.

His sister sat across from him at the table. Her vibrant orchard green eyes mostly focused on Sunset as they sat above pale freckles and the hints of a smirk painted upon cantaloupe-colored skin. Her straw-blonde hair, on which her signature tan cowboy hat sat atop, was tied into a ponytail with a red hair band towards the end of her flowing locks. A blouse the color of bricks adorned with red apples clung her form tightly, leaving her shoulders exposed. A braided leather belt with a red-dotted apple design and brass buttons graced her waist and a pair of ruffled, light-denim hugged her thighs. Finally, short brown and tan cowboy boots with her cutie mark were on her feet.

“Hey, wait,” Pinkie began, “when did you two get in here?”

“Pinkie, we walked in right after you," Applejack insisted.

“Eeyup," Big Mac agreed.

“And you didn’t say anything?!” Pinkie protested.

“You were kinda busy,” Applejack pointed out. “Ah was waitin’ to get a word in!”

“Ooo-kay, kinda rude to just sneak up on us out of nowhere, then!” Pinkie said.

“You implied we were slave owners!” Applejack retorted.

Big MacIntosh let out an irritated, “Eeeeeyup!”

“Kiiiinda rude,” Pinkie reiterated.

“If we weren’t here you’d be talking behind our back!”

“Eeyup.”

“Sure, take the moral high-ground!” Sunset Shimmer exclaimed. “Slave drivers!” she hissed angrily.

Justice gasped. “Not only do they own slaves, but they drive them into the ground! You know… figuratively… and probably literally.”

“Do you think their younger sister has organized an underground escape tunnel?”

“Fuck no!” Justice replied. “That little scamp has come of age! Her quest for self-identity is over and she knows it’s time to help people become who they were meant to be! She probably helps the slaves in apple picking so they can find their true calling.”

Applejack and Big Mac glowered, “Yer lucky we can keep our mouth’s shut, otherwise Apple Bloom would hear of this.”

“Eeeeeeeeeeeyup,” Big Mac agreed with a wrinkled brow.

“Haha, well I’m telling her!” Declared Scootaloo who was busy typing at her phone with her thumbs.

“Scootaloo!” Pinkie exclaimed. “When did you get here?!”

“I’ve been here the whole time!” Scootaloo protested.

“Oh, oh, right!” Pinkie said, “For the background shot where they throw in a bunch of recognizable characters to appease the rabid fan boys and girls who blast show makers on Twitter if they don’t at least get a bone thrown to them every now and again.”

“I’m surprised they didn’t throw in the other two crusaders,” Justice added.

“What?” Scootaloo uttered.

“What?” Pinkie Pie echoed.

“What?” Justice echoed.

Scootaloo’s phone buzzed.

“Oh, hey! Apple Bloom replied. She says she’s on her way after she cattle-prods a few of the more lazy workers!”

Chrysi’s smile rolled out into a delightfully full grin. “Tell her to give one a zap for me!”

“On it!” Scootaloo said.

Applejack sighed. “Coulda y’all be a little louder about how we’re horrendous slave owners?”

“Denied!” Justice said. “We’ll switch to comments about how you’re wonderful slave owners!”

Sunset’s turquoise eyes glittered in the morning sun, “Shelters mostly keeping the rain away.”

“Wild animals captured, given rabies shots, and released specifically into slave quarters as potential pets!”

“Rats that live with the slaves only partially feral and plague ridden!”

“Rat-Kings offered tributes of unwanted, ugly orphan children so that the slave families can thrive and serve the Apples for generations!”

“And yet, nothing about the slave comment,” Chrysi pointed out.

Applejack side-eyed Chrysi, “Ah figured ya didn’t have a leg to stand on there.”

Chrysi checked beneath the table, “No. Still two of them.”

Applejack threw her hands up in the air, “Whatever! At least I spend my money on sensible things like farm equipment.”

“And a luxury vehicle,” Chrysi pointed out.

“That’s practical!” Applejack insisted. “Ah can’t show up in a pick-up truck to every function! You know that!”

“Now ladies,” Justice purred in a deep voice. “Please stop before one of you calls the other ‘new money’ and then we all have to attend a duel.”

Chrysi and Applejack turned to Justice, vengeance and violence in their eyes.

“Mah family has owned that farm for generations!” Applejack insisted.

Chrysi’s irate expression turned to one of sadistic glee. “If anything, you and Sunset are ‘new money’.”

“How dare you!” Justice cried. “This won’t stand!” he turned on his heals. “Come on, Sunny! I need to purchase a boat.”

Sunset snatched his coat by an arm, “First off, stay,” she ordered. “Second off, any particular reason for the boat?”

“So I can battle Chrysi in glorious ‘way too much disposable income’ combat on the open sea! Or perhaps a nearby river or even the streets if we also buy a truck or Sports Utility Vehicle with enough horsepower to tow our new battle boat.”

Chrysi sighed and pulled out a phone from her pocket. She unfolded it into a larger square screen and began to poke and swipe at it with an index finger. “Great! Now I have to buy a new battle boat. You’ve got my interests piqued.”

Sunset’s jaw dropped open as her eyes lit up in pure delight. She let out a girlish squeal that caused most the men and women in the vicinity to shift their legs awkwardly.

Justice chuckled. “Sunset and I sank her last one.”

Chrysi’s forehead tightened. “A thought occurs that I could also raise a few of our old boats from their watery graves.”

Sunset frowned. “But our artificial reefs!”

Justice nodded. “That are armed to the teeth! Between Fluttershy and Aquaman we have enough troops and weapons down there to fend off the Soviets or a sizable splinter of the Tyrranid bio-mass!”

Pinkie gasped. “But this fic doesn’t have the crossover tag! If we start adding elements from other IPs will be breaking FimFiction law and the downvotes will come and get us.”

Chrysi leaned in closer to Sunset as Justice and Pinkie started in with further meta-commentary, “Do you have any idea what those two are talking about? I understood Aquaman and even Tyrranid thanks to you and your twin husband-wife combo, but what the actual fuck is a fimfic?”

Sunset turned to Chrysi with a delighted smile on her face, “Chrysi, my dear, dear roommate. My head is full of fuck. Hopefully that answers… something.”

Chrysi’s jade eyes crossed briefly. “Okay, so you’re as lost as me. Understood.” She scanned the room for a patch of aquamarine. “Will Vengeance be joining us?”

“I messaged her,” Sunset said. “She might not have gotten the message yet…”

“Thank you for cleaning my toes!” D.H.’s somewhat annoyed voice escaped from the closed women’s bathroom door. “My g-spots are all a little higher up on my body, though! Also, my ass is getting cold from sitting on the ground!”

“I’m working my way back up!” Sour Sweet insisted.

“You must own some very satisfied cats,” D.H. replied. “It’s nice at least someone’s pussy is being taken care of.”

“I’m staying down here longer for that one!”

Realization hit Sunset, “Right, I’m supposed to be getting laid right now. Sunset stood up, “Justice, stop talking the secrets of the universe with Pinkie for a sec and get over here.”

“Yessum?” Justice replied as he and Pinkie ceased their back and forth and he took a few quick strides towards Sunset.

She wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled the trench coat wearing man closer. “I’m supposed to be fighting for my sexuality. I wanted to start things off with you.”

Justice’s face flushed slightly, red appearing on his blue cheeks. “And the women’s bathroom is occupied.”

“Yes, I needed safe passage into the men’s bathroom.”

“There are laws saying you can just go in if you identify as a man.”

“People still get uppity if one does that.”

Justice’s eyes widened. “No!”

“I’m afraid so!”

“Philistines!” Justice scanned the room. “There aren’t any actual Philistines here, right? I’d hate to offend assuming that the city state being gone for over 2,000 years. Chrysi? Phillistine? No? Uh… Canaanite? No? Uh… let’s see… Israelite—Whoops seems I’m being dragged into a bathroom by a beautiful woman.”

Pulling Justice into the Men’s bathroom, Sunset poked her head around the Man in the leather trench. “Alright, everyone just stay put for a little bit.”

Scootaloo gave Sunset an A-okay wave.

Chrysi raised an eyebrow. “You need me to lock down the Café?”

Sunset shook her head, her crimson-and-golden-yellow locks waving left and right. “I need you to hold the phone.”

Chrysi frowned. “Did we suddenly travel back in time about two decades?”

“I mean like, I need you to film this because I’ll be busy getting busy.”

“Aha, she said it!” Justice celebrated as Sunset disappeared into the bathroom.

Chrysi grabbed the Men’s Bathroom door and turned. “Alright, uh… Sunset might be aiming to sex up about everyone here.”

“Scootaloo, how old are you?!” Justice shouted from the bathroom.

“Oh my God, Justice. Shut up!” Sunset fired off.

“Eighteen!” Scootaloo replied.

Sunset and Justice’s heads poked out from behind the door. “Wait, really?” Sunset asked.

“Finally!” Justice began. “Your tasteful nudes of Scootaloo are something we can discuss openly.”

“I mean,” Scootaloo began in an effort to improve the conversation, “I’ve been a teenager for the last 8 years, so it’s not like Sunset would have pictures of me of when I’m super young… hypothetically.”

“Right, so worst case scenario she’s a hebephile! Not a predator of children, but a predator of pre-teens and early teens!”

Sunset sighed and got out of the bathroom long enough to motion with Justice with both hands as if she was introducing a public speaker. “The guy I’m about to go down on!” she announced in an irritated tone with a scowl to match.

“Shit!” Justice exclaimed. “I just got downgraded to ‘bj’.”

“Oh no!” Sunset said in sarcastic tone. “Your dreams of romantic sex in a Café restroom: completely dashed!”

“My bucket list!” Justice explained. He hung his head in an overly dramatic fashion. “Now all that’s left is win a Daytime Emmy.” Justice turned and winked at Scootaloo, “Hey, Scootaloo…” he said with a smolder.

Sunset crained her head to get a better look at Scootaloo, “I need you to dig out your old school ID and a archived MyStable Account.”

Scootaloo froze like a little girl presented with a panel van filled with actual puppies and several tubs of ice cream.

Applejack’s brow tightened as she gave Sunset and Justice a scrutinizing look. “Do you two always start love makin’ by makin’ a pedophile joke and shankin’ peeps with old… uh…?” Applejack paused and looked around nervously. “Ah’ll be good…” she whispered.

“NEWS?!” Sunset & Justice exclaimed as they exchanged devious glances. They turned to face Applejack. “YES!”

(Who was busy checking the café menu for Kool-Aid)

The door was shut.

Zippers where lowered.

Pants and boxer briefs where admired and dropped.

A couple dropped to the floor and started desperately sharing each other’s tongues as if there was some sort of shortage in their lover’s mouth.

Sunset broke the kiss long enough to laugh. “Shall we knock on the wall to see how they’re doing?”

Justice sighed, “Well, we published chap 1 before I could insert dialogue of us fucking with each other so…” Justice kicked at the wall much to Sunset’s bubbling, laughing delight. “Hey! HEY! Fellow Bi-os!”

“Oh my actual fuck, boytoy!” Sour Sweet exclaimed. “I’m trying to have sex here!”

D.H. groaned loud enough to prove that the men and women separated by the wall could hear each other fart in the Café. “Star Wars quote inserted here! In my vag! My Vag which is desperate for some tongue action! SHE KEEPS ON LICKING THE INSIDE OF MY KNEE.”

“Holy GOD!” Sunset said, upsetting all the atheist reading, their trilbies spinning so fast that spaghetti flew out, covering their moms who were explaining to them that they regrettied their life decisions. “Baybeeeee, I haven’t had a knee job in ages!”

Not one to let a hint go over his head, Justice rotated his body and began licking the sweet, sweaty dew that collected in the thighs that dislocated and sent the unaware to dreamland. Sunset began moaning in pleasure, her already stirred up sex bubbling with love juices.

Meanwhile, Justice’s member was pointing out where the toilet paper was.

“Damnit!” D,H, exclaimed. “They’re better at knee jobs than you, too!”

There was a sound of one had clapping… a mother fucker’s face. “Listen you lazy bitch! I’ve been letting you dom me for an entire chapter and all you do is bitch and wait for your fucking turn to be eaten out.”

{{{{“Oh, nos!” Justice said between licks. “Written reality is falling apart!”

“This is just like the The Protestant Reformation!” Sunset cried organically.

“Martin Luther nailing his 95 point theses to doors the way he wishes he could nail women who find him loathsome.”

“Solving problems! Disenfranchising women, contributing to secret Catholic doctrine of keeping women out of power so they can kept in nunneries A>K>A BROTHELS!”

Sour Sweet’s impassioned moans quickly went quiet.

“Aaaaaaaaahhhhhh!” Screamed D.H. “You better just do a few more of these before you have to rewrite the chapter! Sour Sweet is babbling about needing an ass-fucking and I’m enjoying her doming!”

“SHAKESPEARE SPILLING THE BEANS!”

“GET THEE TO A NUNERY, SOUR SWEET! THEY’RE YOUR BEST SOURCE OF CLEAN CARPETS TO MUNCH!”

“POPE FRANCIS APPROVED!” Sunset& Justice proclaimed in unison.

From the other-side of the door of the Men’s bathroom door, Wallflower Screamed. Tried to pull out her hair. Was restrained by a rope quickly and expertly tied by Trixie Lulamoon and Starlight Glimmer.

The Ministstratum of Amare regrets that what followed had to be cut due to interrupting the previous scheduled sexies. This line shall continiue next chapter! Stay tuned for more actual honesty !

P.S. Russia already invaded Ukraine and lost horrendously. Yes, Putin’s Russia. You know, one of the guys running everything into the ground.

SINGED : Sunset, Justice, Vengeance, HaraHaraHara Haruko & so many more to come!

The Ministstratum of Amare

Our Love is ACTUAL love and Punishes with Perfect Distinction!

}}}}}}

Ra-RA-ra-RA-REEEEESET!

“DO OR DO NOT DO!” D.H. screamed. “THERE IS NO TRY, as IN stick your tongue in my vag! My Vag which is desperate for some tongue action! SHE KEEPS ON LICKING THE INSIDE OF MY KNEE.”

“Holy GOD!” Sunset said, upsetting all the atheist reading, their Sonic the Hedgehod t-shirts changing to Shadow the Hedgehog t-shirts changing to ‘Charlie Mange was WRONG shirts’. Their dads pretending they don’t beat it hard to every character in the Pilot on YouTube called Hazpin Hotel!“Baybeeeee, I haven’t had a knee job in pages!”

Justice rotated his body and began licking the sweaty, sweetMOISTer that polled in the thighs that had hid many secret babies that you might get to meet in future fics. Sunset moaned in ecstasy, then toned it down remembering they were trying to not undermine what had been written before the editing process. {{{Line Relocated to the Future}}}}}

Meanwhile, Justice’s member was pointing out where the toilet paper was.

“Damnit!” D,H, exclaimed. “They’re better at knee jobs than you, too!”

There was a sound of one had clapping… a mother fucker’s face. “Listen you lazy bitch! I’ve been letting you dom me for an entire chapter and all you do is bitch and wait for your fucking turn to be eaten out.”

The rest if the café broke into laughs, screams, people escaping through plate glass windows as Sunset and Justice high fived hands against feet and began feeling up each other’s sexes.

From the bathroom across the wall, D.H. let out an alarmed squeak as her head bounced against the ` next to the toilet paper. A yelp was to follow but Sour Sweet’s sour sweet pussy was forcefully placed around her mouth.

Sour Sweet moaned, D.H.’s eyes rolled to the back of her head as a stupor smile spread across her lips, Justice moaned, and Sunset realized, Oh God! I need a good throat scraping.

Justice’s soft moan turned hard and load as Sunset took his bell onto her lips and slowly slid him down the length of her tongue until his opening was tickling the back of her throat.

He licked the inside of her knees all the harder.

Trying not to gag on his cock as she laughed around it, Justice sensed that perhaps, perhaps, per--

Would you just fucking ram your tongue down the rabbit hole!?

Gliding his tongue up her right thigh, ‘The neck placement program’, Justice enjoyed the sensation of Sunset sliding her head back and forth, sucking and blowing, his member building and building until she relinquished with a heavy moan as he licked her taint to warren opening and was gifted with her delicious, carroty mangy juices.

Meanwhile, D.H. was rapidly fingering her clit, ‘Warp Bubble’, her fingers slowly than quickly enter-exiting her opening where she moaned, “Justice! I need Almost Illegal inside Super-tiny Black Hole!”

Before anyone could get out even a note of protest, D.H.’s vision turned white, black, then white again as Sour Sweet smashed her juicy-sweet watermelon cunt and rinds so hard against D.H.’s mouth that her entire head went through the drywall.

“DAMNIT!” yelled Sour Sweet.

“Holy Allah, what the fuck was that?!” Chrysi asked, worried about her friend, and also her new café… but mostly her friend.

Her head vibrating with rage, Sour Sweet screamed, “I WAS HOPING TO SHOVE THE BITCH’S HEAD INTO A STUD!”

Justice’s dick shot it’s load straight down Sunset’s throat. Sunset’s pussy quivered and squirted like a soda fountain all over her husband’s wall-eyed face. D.H. squirted and seemingly mistook Sour Sweet’s feet for the toilet.

Chrysi realized she was either going to need to change her lacy-blacks or go commando, and rouly fourteen of the other café patrons realized that they, too, should have packed back-up clothing.

Sunset panted, realized she was gargling, swallowed, panted some more and began suckling once more.

Justice lapped up his delicious Sunset slushm turned his wife onto her back and started drilling mouth and Rabbit Hole alike.

Sour Sweet gave a barely conscious D.H. a sniff of smelling salts visa-vi her creamed and pissed on feet. Cumming too, D.H. suddenly had a big toe followed by a second big toe as Sour Sweet sat her plump rump on the toilet seat.

D.H. had never had so many big toes in her mouth.

She began to gag. Tears filling up her eyes.

The locked door to the girls bathroom flew open, lock broken, hinges bent.

“Would you let up for a bit?!” Chrysi yelled as the door slammed against the wall.

Sour Sweet froze for a second and looked down as D.H. pulled the feet from her mouth. “No, no… I uh…” D.H. retched once at the smell of Sour Sweets toes and she immediately pulled the back.

Catching her breath, D.H. fished out the panties from the toilet and began wiping Sour Sweets toes, much to the delight of Chrysi and a crescent smiling Sour Sweet.

The moans crescendoed from the other side of the wall.

Her smile waning into a smirk, Chrysi knocked, “Hello lovers, how are things going?”

Sunset let out a breathy sigh. “Uhhhh… blurb blub blrub… blub.

“Uh-huh.”

Panting, Justice spoke up. “Sour Sweet scored two points from this side.”

Chrysi couldn’t help but close her eyes and cackle. “And you two are at?!”

“Sunset and I have one point… erm… between us.”

Seemingly regaining some sense, Sunset spoke, “Derp… erm… D… huff… puff… H. gets two points, too.

Chrysi’s smile dropped and her face went gaunt. “Wha oh...”

“Uh, did y’all forget tha people out here?” Apple Bloom crooned.

“Yeah, ‘cause man,” Scootaloo interjected as she shared a smile in the direction of the kitchen. “It smells like the grand opening at a really awesome adult toy store.”

Chrysi turned and walked out of the women’s bathroom, followed by Sour Sweet who was helping a very satisfied D.H. walk. D.H. tilted her head as she took note of a purple skinned woman in a beanie and gave her a wink.

Sitting just to the side of the table Chrysi had claimed was an often seen trio. Apple Bloom grinned wide, “Didja really think those two would keep this thing from spilling over?”

“Yeah, too say nothing about Justice, I’m surprised there isn’t some sort of Space Vespa fleet here already.” Scootaloo said.

“High Schoolers escaping their classes to look up!” delighted Sweetie Belle.

“Elementary Schools on lock-down,” Scootaloo said with a scooter sized smiled.

“Middle Schoolers cautiously optimistic!” trolled Apple Bloom.

“Va-va-VROM-VROM-Vespas on the way!” Sweetie Belle exclaimed. Scootaloo smiled cresent and grinned at Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom as they spoke in unison, “And here are The Karma Tallies to count the cost!”

A brown skinned teenager brushed fiery aburn hair out of the way of his Amber eyes. “With ME! Button MASH!”

Love Tap smiled over a steaming mug of delicious, new to the menu, Turkish Mocha. “Meowth! That’s right!”

Author's Note

Vespa fleet in orbit. Big Brother Galaxy is watching your highly, locally illegal, sex. Thumbs up all around.” --Haruko and Peridot.

I was told I needed to contribute. Man, this place is sure run like the company that owns Apple Stores. I mean, geez… This is just like trying to work for that company that owns Apple Stores. Gee wilikers, I feel just like a drone at that company that owns Apple Stores. I’m being paid in actual Apples and Apple products just like that company that owns Apple Stores. Oh, I’m being told that I’m taking up too much time and thinking too far out of the box, EXACTLY like that company that owns Apple Stores.

Chrysi’s watch for anyone interested to see or sitting around with a spare half-a-mil.

--Lapis Lazuli