A Place For My Thoughts

by Cavemonkynick

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Original Character, Comedy, Shining Armor
Length: 2940

The Journal of Devin Windelbane

This is the journal of Devin Windelbane, a young pegasus who left Cloudsdale to make a life for himself.

For those of you who have read my story "Her Sword, Shield, and Friend" this is the story of Night Wing's early years fleshed out. I know doing it as a journal isn't the most original idea ever but it is what it is.

Rated T because of mild language. Nothing too bad but I figure I should mark it anyways, better safe than sorry.

As always, a huge thanks to ShyYoungBrony for his continued diligence. Seriously dude, you are awesome.

Cover image by me. It sucks :pinkiesmile:

Published 2012-09-16 13:14:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-12-07 07:26:10 UTC

The Story So Far

Spring, Week 7, Day 4, Year 990 of Celestia’s Reign (CR)

Wow, I have no idea how to start this. I guess the basics are as good a place as any. My name is Devin Windelbane. I’m a sixteen year old, blank flank pegasus, born and raised in Cloudsdale. When my mom was still carrying me she got sick. The doctors didn’t know what it was and it was too risky to move her to Canterlot so they had to birth me early hoping that at least I would survive, which I did… Obviously.

Because of my early birthing my muscles never formed properly. This left me with very little endurance, something that still plagues me to this day although I have learned that there may be a way to treat it, but I'm getting ahead of myself. Anyways, thanks to my physical shortcomings I spent a lot of time reading and learning. It was all I had really. Unfortunately part of being a pegasus is flight school, and part of flight school is flying, and flying is hard when you can’t exert yourself for more than ten minutes at a time. And that’s on a good day. Needless to say, I didn’t do very well in flight school. I started when I was twelve, like all the other fillies and colts. The average pegasus will finish flight school in eight or nine months, give or take. A year tops for slow learners, and I was there for four years. It’s downright embarrassing to be honest but I just didn’t have the strength for the flight exams.

So I left Cloudsdale behind just over two weeks ago in the middle of the night. I left dad a note telling him that I was tired of being a failure and that I’d be back when I managed to become somepony. Don’t take that the wrong way, nopony blamed me for my condition. Even my classmates seemed to understand that I was sick and didn’t haze me about it, so I didn’t leave because of them, I left for me. A pegasus is more than just a pair of wings and I’ll be damned to Tartarus before I just lay down and quit. So I left.

All in all it was a poorly thought out decision. I just picked a bunch of clouds that seemed to make a suitable impromptu path to the ground and it worked fine until I ran out of clouds. I figured I was close enough to the ground so I just went for it. Stupid? Extremely, but it worked… sorta.

Ok so I gave out just below the tree line and got to know nature on a very personal level via an oak tree that broke my fall. It also broke my wing which I thought was pretty rude at first, but I did invade the tree’s personal space, and it was nice enough to save my stupid flank, so I figured it best to let bygones be bygones. After that brush with death I trudged off in the direction of a path I’d seen before my leap of stupidity. It’s worth noting that walking with a broken wing sucks, especially when you don’t have anything to splint it or even hold it still. All I could do was let it hang limply at my side so I'd end up brushing it on something or accidentally kicking it and that would make me wince and then the wince would hurt and I’d wince harder which hurt worse so my brain would force my wing to relax but then that movement would hurt and it was all very painful and absolutely infuriating. By the time I reached the path my head was swimming from the endless cycle of pain and I blacked out.

I woke up in a hospital, much to my surprise. A nurse came in and told me that I was in Canterlot and that a member of the royal guard had found me and carried me here. Later that day said guard dropped in for a visit. He introduced himself as Shining Armor, Captain of Celestia's Royal Guard. When I asked how he found me he said he had been sent to investigate reports of Timberwolves in the area when he came across me. Seems I’d gotten a lot luckier than I realized. Then he asked how I ended up out cold in the middle of the woods. I considered making something up but instead I told him everything. Not sure why, I just felt like I could trust him. He took it all in stride, promised not to ship me back off to Cloudsdale and even offered me his spare room until I got back on my own four hooves.

I was released after four days, moved in with Shining Armor and I’m still staying with him. He’s the one who suggested I keep a journal, said it helps him keep his thoughts straight. Shining and I have gotten to know each other pretty well. I went with him to visit his family last weekend and he introduced me to his parents and his little sister who informed me I have a funny name. Gotta love kids.

So like I said, I was released almost two weeks ago. I'm still stuck in this damn cast though. It’s left me with a lot of time to think about where I want to go from here, and I think I’m gonna try for the guard. From what Shining Armor has told me the Lunar Guard is hurting for new recruits right now and if I show enough initiative then they may be willing to work with me and pay for that treatment I mentioned earlier. Oh right, I haven’t elaborated on that yet. Well I’m not really sure on all the details but it’s some kind of physical therapy that’s supplemented by unicorn magic. I won’t be setting any flying records but I’ll at least be functional as a pegasus.

Well it’s late and my jaw is cramping. You’d think with all their crazy magic some unicorn would have come up with a spell or enchantment where you could dictate to a pencil or a quill or something and it'd write for you. That unicorn would be set for life. Seriously, get with the program all you inventors out there!

A New Beginning

Spring, Week 8, Day 6, Year 990 of Celestia’s Reign (CR)

The last few days have been pretty good. The other day I finally got my cast removed and the doc cleared me for that special therapy provided I get the funding. My wing is still a little sore but it is amazing how liberating it is to be rid of that bucking chunk of plaster even though it took forever to get all my feathers straightened. Can’t fly on it yet, but that’s not exactly a drastic change from the norm so yeah.

Then yesterday Shining Armor took me up to Canterlot Castle so we could talk to the captain of the Lunar Guard, Shimmering Sky. He was an older unicorn stallion with a pale brown coat, a black mane, and a cutie mark that looked like the night sky had smudged his flank, stars and all. Shining introduced me and I told Sky my story.

When I was done he looked at me and asked, “What do you want from me?”

I replied, “A chance to start over sir.” He didn’t respond, instead he just looked at me for a minute or two. Honestly it was a little creepy but I felt like I was being sized up or tested or something so I stared right back.

Finally he spoke. “Alright kid, you seem to have a good head on your shoulders. I’ll give you a shot. If all else fails you can push paperwork.”

I told him if that’s what it took I’d gladly do it. So we filled out all the forms and Sky told me he’d get in touch with the hospital about the therapy and send word when it was time for me to start, which I was told today I start the day after tomorrow.

I also wrote my father a letter today, nothing special just letting him know that I was ok and that I’d found the chance to prove myself I was looking for. It was a lot harder to write than I expected.

Dad was always supportive of me. He never doubted me. He never put me down when I failed a flight exam. He was great… It really made leaving hard, but I couldn’t hurt him anymore. Dad is a respected stallion in Cloudsdale. He works at the cloud factory. He’s not too high up the ladder but he likes where he is and he’s been there for 30 years. I just… I don’t want to let him down…

I feel bad that I didn’t tell him I was leaving. He probably would have helped me out. Then again I might have never met Shining Armor.

I’m over-thinking this. I’m terrible about that. The next thing you know I’ll be spiraling down into “what if’s.”

What if I had been born normal? What if I had died leaving Cloudsdale? What if Shimmering Sky hadn’t given me a chance? It’s a bad road that I refuse to walk again. Questions beyond my ability to answer, the “what if’s,” they leave me drained, depressed. And getting worked up over circumstances out of my control is nothing but a waste of time and sanity. I’ve got nowhere left to go but forward now, and I intend to make the most of it.

Progress

Spring, Week 11, Day 1, Year 990 of Celestia’s Reign (CR)

These last two weeks, sweet Celestia, these last two weeks… I’m surprised my wings haven’t fallen clean off yet. So this therapy involves me pushing my wings to my limits to break the muscles down then the unicorn overseeing me straps me into some magic… thing that is supposed to speed up the healing process. The whole idea is to train the muscles to do it themselves since they didn’t learn when I was developing or something. All I know is it is painful and exhausting.

But according to the doc’s, it’s working. Up to this point we’ve been doing sessions every other day but after tomorrow they want to dial it back to once a week. This means I can start my training with the Lunar Guard.

I sense more pain in my future.

All complaining aside though, I’m really happy here. Shining is a blast to be around, even if he did spend the first few days of my therapy poking fun at me because I couldn’t move. The docs are great about working with me and keeping me from killing myself. Shimmering Sky even stopped by the other day to see how I was adjusting to life on the ground. Everypony around here is convinced that it’s reality shattering for me coming straight from Cloudsdale but to be honest, the only thing that really stands out to me is I’m not the only one walking home now instead of flying. Ok, so maybe I was a little mesmerized by the plants at first but it was definitely intrigue and not culture shock.

Speaking of home, my dad wrote back to me. He said he was glad I was safe and while he didn’t like that I snuck off he understood and respected my decision. He also said that no matter what, if I ever needed it I’d always have a home with him. I’ll be honest, when I read that I almost cried. Knowing my dad is behind me… it means the whole world to me. As soon as I have the strength to do it on my own, I’m gonna fly up to Cloudsdale to see him. Right, well, early day tomorrow, time for some shut eye.

Training

Summer, Week 2, Day 3, Year 990 of Celestia’s Reign (CR)

Today has been one of the best days of my entire life, but first I should probably explain why I haven't written in over a month. Short answer? Lunar Guard training camp. Long answer? Well, you best get comfortable.

The first day of training was a blur of paperwork and shots. I genuinely can't remember just how many holes the medical staff poked in my flank that day and I don't really care to try. I got immunized for things I didn't even know existed. I swear they made half of them up just to stab us with the needle thirty times. This confusing and exhausting process kept us up all night. I wasn't finished with my stuff until around noon the next day. At that point I was able to catch a small nap while the ponies in charge weren’t looking before they sorted us into divisions. Once we'd all been assigned a bed they told us we had until sundown to crash, and then the real work began.

They weren’t kidding. The first seven days, well nights technically, were what they called "Shock Training." Basically it was one physically daunting task after another in full armor kit. If we were awake, we were either eating or working our flanks off. It was brutal, especially the climbing because I wasn't allowed use of my wings unless I fell, which happened a lot. Half of the ponies either quit or washed out that week but I held my own. Then the next week was purely academic. Thankfully I was good at this part. Unfortunately the better I did the more work they threw at me and I just kept soaking up the information like a dry sponge. After seven days of physical torture I was back in familiar territory. I could not make myself slow down. It was almost as if I felt that if I didn’t do good enough they were going to make me run more laps and climb the wall again.

After the first two weeks, things finally calmed down. They took everypony who was left, which was about twenty ponies, and put us all in the same division. We were told from this point on it was all or nothing for us. If one of us failed, we all did. For that whole week we had combat training in the mornings and team building exercises in the afternoon. We all learned basic hoof-to-hoof but then we were taught advanced techniques based on our race.

Unicorns were taught basic combat magic: stunning spells, basic shield spells, some even learned elemental spells like fire and ice but were instructed only to utilize them when dealing with major threats. Earth ponies were taught to make full use of their strength to perform amazing feats with their bare hooves. And pegasi were taught to out-maneuver opponents and take advantage of weak points to avoid drawn out confrontations. I was surprisingly good at this. Turns out I have a really sharp mind. I mean, I know I was book smart but when put on the spot my mind kicks into overdrive and has my next five moves planned out in an instant. My only problem was getting my body to do what I needed it to. I was overpowered too easily but never outsmarted. The instructors picked up on this and pulled me aside for strength and speed training.

The team building exercises were a bit different. The instructors would pick a leader and then present us all with a problem, a set of guidelines for solving said problem, and a time limit. The first few times around were pretty sad honestly, but it was to be expected. We were all still figuring out where we fit in. Somehow I ended up in a sort of joint leadership position with a unicorn named Flourish. I came up with the plans and she got everypony organized and made it happen. After a few days we were clearing any challenge the instructors could throw at us with no problem.

The last week we went over a little of everything we learned then today was our graduation. We were all knighted by Princess Celestia herself one by one. When she reached me, I knelt and she recited something regal. I don’t remember the exact words because this took place at noon, and I’ve become nocturnal so I was tired. When she told me to stand, I did so and looked up at her. I expected her to move on to the next pony, but instead she just looked at me and smiled. Then she told me to look at my flank. I did as I was told and immediately noticed a new addition, a full moon bearing the Mare in the Moon with a bat-like wing that wrapped around half of it's circumference.

Every fiber of my being was focused on not running in circles and screaming like a little filly, Shimmering Sky would have had my head on a platter, so I fell back in line. I couldn’t stop grinning though. After the ceremony we were all given leave, so we all headed into town to celebrate. Somewhere along the line, one of the guys called me Night Wing and it just sorta stuck. It kinda sounded stupid at first, but the more I think about it the more I like it. It beats the hay out of Devin Windelbane, that’s for sure.

Night Wing of the Lunar Guard. Yeah, I like that…