Scootaloo Lays an Egg

by DaughterScrewball

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Discord, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Main 6, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Scootaloo
Length: 1435

Scootaloo Lays an Egg...

Scootaloo Lays an Egg. Adventure ensues.

Published 2012-10-14 18:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-10-14 18:50:01 UTC

Scootaloo Lays an Egg

Scootaloo awoke. What time is it? Not owning a watch, she quickly hopped outside the clubhouse and looked up into the blazing expanse of the sun. Why does it have to be so bright? Judging from the sun's position, it was about noon. Scootaloo had overslept; her friends would be here in just a few minutes.

And Scootaloo desperately needed to eat her breakfast first.

She climbed back into the treehouse and opened a basket. Eggs. That's what I need to get me completely awake. As fate would have it, there were no eggs. Scootaloo let out a silent sigh and settled for a daisy sandwich, which she promptly began to assemble. It's just not the same. I really wish I had some eggs left over... Her stomach rumbled even though she was in the middle of eating something. I'll just have to remember to go get some from Fluttershy after I'm done with Sweetie Belle and Applebloom.

As if on cue, the other two Cutie Mark Crusaders popped their heads into the treehouse. How are they both fitting their heads up there at the same time? Scootaloo's head started to ache. She didn't have the energy without her daily egg to think this out right now.

"How're you guys doing?" she asked.

"Amazing!" said Sweetie.

"Purty good," answered Applebloom. They both beamed at her with more enthusiasm than Scootaloo would be able to muster all day, thanks to the fact that she had missed the most essential part of her breakfast.

"So I think I've got a really good idea to try today," Sweetie Belle continued. Applebloom shook in excitement. Scootaloo stared back at them with a blank expression on her face. Maybe they want me to guess? I don't have the energy for this.

"Just tell me what it is!"

"Oh, right," responded Applebloom. "Are you ready for this?"

"Yes," Scootaloo replied flatly.

"Are you sure you can handle the pure awesomeness?" squeaked Sweetie Belle.

"Of course..." Scootaloo rolled her eyes.

"Are you pumped!"

"This is getting kinda--"

"Cow milking!" They exclaimed in unison. Scootaloo facehooved in her mind.

That is probably the stupidest idea any of us has ever had. Who wants a cow milking cutie mark anyway? Scootaloo's stomach growled as she looked into her friends' expecting faces. They were waiting to see what Scootaloo thought of the idea. But they are my friends, after all. Her stomach growled again. And they do look awfully excited about this idea. The grumpy mumblings of her stomach were refusing to cease. Sweetie Belle and Applebloom started to frown after waiting for a few moments in silence. Plus, I don't really have the energy to convince them against the idea.

"Cow milking it is!" the orange pegasus exclaimed, grinning.

"CUTIE MARK CRUSADER COW MILKERS! YAY!!!"

__________________________________________________________

They were standing in the barn of Sweet Apple Acres, preparing to rid the cows of the creamy white liquid that resided in their teats. Just thinking about the activity they were about to participate in made Scootaloo a bit sick to the stomach. It didn't help that she still hadn't gotten her daily dose of egg. It also didn't help that the barn was positioned directly next to the egg pen.

"Are you girls ready?" piqued Applebloom.

"Sure," responded Sweetie.

"I guess..." mumbled Scootaloo.

"OK, so Applejack gave me a list of supplies to make sure we had. Ahem. Buckets?"

"Check," said Sweetie Belle.

"Great, let's get to work," replied the yellow filly.

Is that really all there is to the list? Scootaloo would have asked, but a slight but sharp pain erupted from her belly. If things keep going like this, today is going to be pretty tough. Her stomach moaned again in response. Buck you.

"The next thing Applejack told me is that you need to squeeze gently and pull at the same time. But don't squeeze to hard, and especially don't pull to hard. She said you have to find each cow's 'natural balance'."

Scootaloo carefully slid under the nearest bovine and began the motion that Applebloom described. Gently squeezing and pulsation. Pull, stop. Pull, stop. Pull, stop. After a few pulsations, milk began to flow slowly from the teat. This is gross. Occasionally, part of the lukewarm liquid would be thicker than the rest. I hate cows so much. Upon close observation, Scootaloo noticed a pinkish tint to the milk. Oh Celestia that isn't... it is, isn't it. Eww, this is so gross. She bent in closer to inspect it. It was definitely blood.

Scootaloo couldn't keep herself from puking, but she was able to delay the worst of it. "I'll be right back, girls!" Applebloom nodded in her direction.

The pegasus filly dashed out of the barn and into the nearest bush. Immediately upon arrival, she proceeded to empty her stomach of all fluids, foreign or not. So much for the daisy sandwich.

For a few seconds, Scootaloo felt better, but soon enough reality caught up and the effects of the sudden evacuation hit her. There was now an especially empty void in her stomach, and the only item it wanted to be filled with was an egg.

Scootaloo's stomach growled again. Celestia dammit!

And again.

And again. And again. And again. Each time was more gut-wrenching than the last.

Out of the corner of her eye, Scootaloo absentmindedly looked toward the chicken coop and glimpsed her salvation. A single egg, apparently abandoned by its mother for some reason. She wasted no time rushing to the egg to inspect the curious miracle. She began by sniffing it.

It doesn't smell rotten. She poked at it with her hoof. It's not too soft, either. She tried to think of another test to perform, but her stomach wrenched instead. I guess it's safe to eat then. She lifted it to her mouth. Thank you, merciful Celestia, for this gift. Her jaw opened. She lifted the egg closer. Her heart was pounding.

All of the sudden, Scootaloo felt an easily noticeable absence in her stomach area. Which was weird, considering how empty her stomach had felt just seconds before. She looked down and saw what seemed at the moment to be the least likely thing possible.

"Applebloom! Sweetie Belle! Come quick, you're not gonna believe this!" The other two crusaders arrived almost immediately after Scootaloo finished calling for them. And I thought I was quick.

"What happened!?" they asked in unison.

"See this egg on the ground?"

"Well, yeah..." Applebloom answered, confused.

"I just laid it!"

"No you didn't! Everyone knows ponies can't lay eggs. Were not stupid, Scootaloo!" Sweetie Belle responded, flaring.

"No, seriously!" Maybe just putting the news out there for them to take wasn't the best idea.

"That's impossible! It'd be like if someone said that I was a robot. Would you believe that?" questioned the unicorn filly.

"Well, no. But--"

"Then why do you expect us to believe this?"

"Wait a second, girls!" Applebloom interrupted. "Look at her flank!"

Scootaloo peered at her back end. Sure enough, their was something there. Something she'd been crusading to get for a long time. Something that she didn't think would look the way it did.

Her cutie mark. Her egg cutie mark, to be exact.

All three crusaders stared at Scootaloo's flank blindly for a minute or two before Sweetie Belle broke the silence.

"Huh. I guess that pretty much proves it, then." She paused for a breath before continuing. "I, uh... I'm sorry for not believing you at first, Scootaloo. It's just that nopony has ever, like ever, laid en egg before."

"Yeah, yeah, enough with the sappy stuff, I forgive you. I wouldn't have believed myself either if I weren't there to see it myself." The fillies resumed staring at Scootaloo's no-longer-blank flank.

"What do you think it means?" Asked Applebloom.

"I have no idea whatsoever." More silence passed.

"Oh! Oh!" exclaimed Sweetie Belle. "Maybe we should ask Twilight about it! She knows a lot about cutie marks, and maybe she'll be able to tell us why Scootaloo laid an egg to begin with!"

"Yeah!" answered Scootaloo.

"Great idea, Sweetie!" said Applebloom.

Scootaloo grabbed her newly laid egg and led the other crusaders to her custom scooter before taking off, headed for Twilight's library.

__________________________________________________________

*Knock knock knock!*

Applebloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo were standing in front of Ponyvilles only library, waiting for Twilight to answer the door, let them in, and hopefully help answer some of their questions.

Scootaloo's stomach growled.

In all the commotion, she had forgotten to eat the first egg.

Buck my life.