Rainbow Dash attempts to write a research paper

by Fleety

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy
Length: 1011

Rainbow Dash attempts to write a research paper, nothing goes well.

Rainbow Dash is forced by Twilight to write a research paper.

She doesn't know how to write one but she's going to prove it.

And make it twenty percent cooler, or worse.

This crackfic was written as an entry for A Thousand Word Contest under Fluff.

Published 2022-05-29 14:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2022-05-29 14:40:01 UTC

Doodles are research!

“Hey Twilight wassup?” Rainbow called out as she entered Golden Oaks Library.

The first thing she noticed was that Twilight seemed to be reading a stack of books and trying to write on blank pieces of paper.

“Oh my gosh Rainbow you're here just right on time!”

“Oh wow is there something you need my help with?”

“Well not really it's more like I’ve got a task for you to do!”

“Oh is it something cool?”

“No, I need you to write a research paper.”

“What? You can’t be serious, I don’t even know what to write about!”

“I need you to really do this Rainbow, Princess Celestia has given this to you as a task!”

“You're joking, she’s always the one giving you the task, not me!”

Twilight was caught off guard from getting easily debunked by Rainbow, but Twilight was quickly recovered to give another excuse. “No, I am serious!”

“Really?”

“Oh come on you said you're awesome at anything, wouldn’t that mean you will do fine at a research paper?” Turned to glance at Rainbow, giving her best puppy eyes at her.

“That's… Not the same thing.”

“Well I don’t really care. Besides, I left a note to tell you what topic I want you to write about.”

“But why me?”

“Well, I am just too lazy to do my homework.” Twilight muttered.

“What was that?”

“Oh sorry, I gotta go do some chores now byeeee!” Twilight chimed.

“Wait!”

Twilight disappears in a flash.

“Rainbow…” Twilight facehoofed at herself. “Just what have you done to my library and my work?”

“I made it cool?”

“Doesn’t look like it!” Twilight frantically lifts a shaky hoof to point at an odd drawing of something. “Like what on earth is this!?”

“Ohhh that's my new formula for hypothesis.”

“...What?”

“Yup…”

“Okay”, Twilight says with uncertainty before frantically pointing another hoof at something else. It was a set of scribbles, sketches and stick figures displaying a battle of epic proportions. “But what about this!?”

“Oh um…”

“And my library, It looks like a warzone!” Twilight cried. “How did this happen?” She muttered, feeling as though the universe had turned on her.

“Well you see, it began with…”

“Hmpf, that egghead…” Rainbow muttered to herself. “Giving me all the work to do.”

After what seemed like ages of staring at the paper and not understanding a single thing she finally decided to flip the paper over to begin reading.

“I’ll show you Twilight… I’ll show you.” Rainbow muttered to herself again.

As Rainbow read the papers she realised there was a problem. The words she read seemed to just make no sense in her head.

“What the heck is photosynthesis?” Rainbow stares at a picture of plants that makes no sense to her at all.

“Oh well, eggheads have a strange way of understanding the world around us.”

There were a lot of papers and books on the table and by the looks of it. To Rainbow it seems like it would take a long time before she could read through everything. Actually maybe never, this was just too many books.

“How did Twilight manage to read this much?” Rainbow thought out loud.

“Hey it's not my fault that I can read this much.”

“But it's not my fault either that I can’t read as much as you do.”

“Uhhh, okay point taken.”

After what seemed like half an hour of mindlessly flipping through books, Rainbow had gotten bored and decided it was time to write. Only to realise that she did not know what to write about, there were just too many different topics, and so she put her pen back down.

Only to accidentally knock a pot of ink over, causing its contents to spill everywhere and onto the parchment and books.

“Oh no no no!” Rainbow yelled in panic and she tried to get the pot back up, but in her haste her hooves didn’t get a good grip on the pot and it slipped off her hooves. It falls back onto the table and shatters into a million fragments with ink sent flying all over the place.

Yelling in rage at having the table and floor ruined, now her mane and hooves as well. “Urgh!” Rainbow punched the books in frustration, sending them flying across the room.

“So that was why my library looked like a warzone!”

“Hey it's fine! Your assistant can uhhhh, clean it up.” Rainbow smiled sheepishly.

“Urgh! Stupid books!” Rainbow shouted in rage as she began pounding and throwing pieces of parchment and paper all over the place.

As if on cue, or the universe just wants to make the situation awkward, the door to Golden Oaks Library opened and Scootaloo came walking in. “Hey Twilight, you there? I need some help with hom-” A piece of book smacks itself against Scootaloo’s forehead and she passes out.

Rainbow did not notice what had happened and was about to give another kick when she noticed something on the floor among the scattered piles of books.

“Oh hey what’s this?” she said, staring at what seems to be a book on the floor. It read, ‘How to Write A Topic.’

“Bah!” Rainbow toss the book aside not realising the title was exactly what it read.

However, before she did more damage an idea sprang into her mind. She was going to copy every word, page by page, from every book onto the papers and call that a job well done, maybe add some doodles and artwork too.

“Rainbow!” Twilight gave her friend a scornful look. “That’s not how you do note taking and write a research paper!”

“Oh well! That’s what happens when you choose someone as cool as me to do your homework.” Rainbow gave a smug.

“Oh don’t you give me that face.” She deadpanned.

“Oh gosh, look at the time, I gotta go now egghead!” Rainbow dashed out the door.

“Hey! Come back here!” Twilight said, charging after Rainbow as her friend fled.