Dreamwalker's Tale: First (and Last?) Adventure

I was a firm believer that such a thing as ‘too much sleep’ did not exist. Furthermore, I was a creature of habit. Like most ponies were, really. I was just a little more oversensitive when something disturbed my habits. Sleeping habits, for example.

So when I woke up and still felt tired, I was inclined to blame the fact that we had retreated to bed in the afternoon, a rather unusual time for me, and that we had interrupted our sleep. Especially the entire fiasco with Ahuizotl was a thorn in my sleepy side.

But the dreamscape had been kind to me. Luna and I had a lot of time on our hooves. Few nightmares, few overzealous dreamscape creatures and we refrained from visiting the Tantabus until Spike and Twilight had everything ready to go. We talked a bunch. Visited Derpy and had a little tea party. It was nice. All around a nice, quiet night.

And really, waking up to these pale magenta eyes was something I cherished, tiredness or no. Exactly why Celestia watched me eluded me for now, but I had no urge to investigate just yet. I instead leaned forward. The rustle of my movement and our breathing were the only sounds in the tent. The ghost of a smile graced her lips when I pulled away again. “Mornin’!” I greeted her quietly with my best Applejack-impression.

And her smile grew a little stronger in reaction to it. “Good morning,” she replied. We both fell silent for a while. Something was on her mind again, I could see it. And I was more than willing to give her time to voice it. Or not. To make a decision about that, at least. And eventually, she did speak up. “How are you doing?”

“A little tired,” I admitted, ostentatiously interrupted by a yawn I failed to properly stifle. Her smile grew a notch more, accompanied by an amused glint in her eyes. Not what she wanted to hear then. Not what she was aiming at. I suspected that I already knew what this was about. But playing coy had been fun. I shrugged as best as I could. “I’m fine. You don’t need to worry. Last night was admittedly weird. But I’m a Ponyvillian, remember? We’re used to weird things. There were three things happening and all of them are kinda ‘meh’ in their consequences right now. First off, we met a real-life novel antagonist. He seemed a little rough around the edges, but not quite as barbaric as he is portrayed in the books. Makes me rethink the whole ‘writer’s bias’-thing. A. K. Yearling writes about Daring Do’s adventures. From Daring Do’s perspective. That obviously tints the entire experience. It’s just… it’s easy to forget, you know? To get absorbed into that storyline and just… I had to stop and rethink. Reevaluate the stories I had consumed. Ahuizotl is a bit of a prick. But he’s no monster.”

“I never met him face to face,” Celestia replied as she drifted from one thought to another. “Maybe something good will come of this chance encounter. I like to believe that we may be able to open diplomatic discourse with these guardians. Especially now that I know where to find at least one of them.”

I grinned. “Right. Already working on the betterment of Equestria again. Even without wearing your regalia. That’s impressive. You know. Realizing that you really can’t pull the Princess out of Celestia, even though you can clearly pull Celestia out of the Princess.”

In a touch of childishness, she stuck out her tongue. And she really should have thought better of that. Then again, maybe she knew that I was only teasing her and waited for a reaction. I leaned in quickly like a snake and snatched her tongue between my lips. And gave it a little suck. She quickly pulled her tongue free and pulled her head back a little. “Ew,” she blurted out and we both had a giggle.

She nuzzled me after she regained our composure. “What about the other two?”

“Hm?” I hummed in a mixture of mild confusion and satisfaction. “Oh, right. Well, he revealed the whole ‘Elements are for everyone’-thing. Which… fair enough, I guess? It makes sense, at least. But it doesn’t change anything. Because he’s right. Right now, we have them. I don’t really know what the rest of the world looks like. In what state it is. What terrible dangers and doomsday weapons await out there. But for the past few years, Equestria had been a focal point of resurfacing villains and world-domination plans. I like to think that the Elements are in good hooves right now. And even if they are recalled at some point… I don’t think it’s actually a loss. We will get them back if we truly need them, right? So that whole revelation somehow doesn’t… it doesn’t feel all that impactful. Like… I realize that this should be huge. But it just isn’t. And then there’s the obvious elephant in the room. Bat ponies. They are real, apparently. But again, it’s just the same as with the Elements. So there’s a fourth tribe. Good to know, I guess? I don’t know anything about them. They don’t live in Equestria. As far as I know, anyway. It’s just… this huge, huge, huuuge revelation with… little to no impact. My world doesn’t change due to this. My daily life most likely won’t either. I mean… when Soft Step came out of these bushes, my first thought was literally: Huh. That’s not the kind of reaction you’re supposed to have when your world gets turned upside down, right? I think this might be a big thing for many ponies. Researchers and historians and whatnot. But I’m none of that. I was actually surprised that in all these years I have been patrolling the dreamscape alongside Luna, we never encountered a bat pony dreamer. I mean, with them being nocturnal, right, that makes sense. But even then, they just don’t seem to be all that… troubled, you know? And I don’t think that Luna ever really tried to subtly push me away from one. Since subtlety really isn’t her style. Maybe that says a lot about their civilization these days. Or how few of them are really out there. And in a way, it’s fun speculating about that. But it’s little more than that. Sooo… if you were worried about me falling into yet another existential crisis, I am proud to disappoint you. My homemade crises are way better anyway, they really shake you to the core.”

That little smirk I put into that last sentence went a long way to lighten the mood somewhat again. It had not darkened of course, but the entire topic just seemed to be a little burdensome. Celestia smiled, warm and tender and genuine and I loved that smile. I sighed deeply. Happily.

“Did you tell her?” she asked after a couple of comfortable, quiet moments.

“Luna?” I asked innocently, but she just raised one eyebrow ever so slightly. “Would it matter? Surely you had thought about this possibility before we went back to bed.” After all, she was nothing if not thorough and judicious.

“No,” she simply replied, much to my surprise.

“You haven’t thought about it?” I asked just to confirm what was already said.

She sighed. “I have not. I like to believe that you are intelligent enough to consider long-term consequences. Maybe not on the same scale and with the same precision as myself, but you have always been respectful of my work and my wishes. And I want to trust you.”

She was getting serious again and I was having none of that. “Aha!” I quipped. “So this is about you trusting me. So there’s obviously a right and a wrong answer here!”

She sighed. “Please, could you just answer?”

My efforts were apparently in vain this time. I sighed a little. “You said it yourself, love. ‘Respectful of your work and wishes’, yadda yadda yadda. I got your back. I didn’t tell her.” I saw a little bit of relief wash over her and I hoped that with this out of the way, our morning could be a little more chipper. “Sooo… how are you doing yourself? While I don’t mind our little breakfast- and dinner-setup, it’s… it’s charming. Really. In a very makeshift, crude way. If you’re feeling up to it, I wouldn’t mind returning home though.”

Nothing seemed to change much for a moment until she pulled me in for a hug. I nestled close to her and enjoyed the embrace for all it was worth. “We should head home,” she whispered and I simply agreed with a nod and placed a kiss on her throat.

“There's something I had to think about last night, before we fell asleep again,“ I teased her.

“Oh? What might that have been?“

I pulled back just enough so that I could see her reaction. “A geas is basically the mental version of you pulling ropes and blindfolds out on me,“ I murmured with a grin. “I came to the conclusion that I might not mind that at all...“

She looked a little perplexed for a few seconds and a lovely red tint colored her cheeks. Yes! Cracked that mask! While I cheered internally, she recomposed herself a little bit. Just a little bit. And her lips tugged upwards in a playful smile. “Is that so?“ she softly teased in reply. She leaned in and her lips closed around the tip of my ear. She applied the faintest bit of pressure before suddenly biting down a little bit harder. It was faintly painful, but more importantly sent a shiver down my spine. “Interesting,“ she noted while her hot breath tickled my ear. “Lucky me then, since we do have a few more days left to ourselves.“ She was a relentless tease. I already suspected that she would use little opportunities here and there throughout the day to rile me up and quite honestly, I was looking forward to it. Both the teasing and the eventual payoff.

We climbed out of bed and for one final time made our way upstairs and busied ourselves with our morning routines. We stepped out of the tent shortly after and into the oppressing heat of the day. I felt a grim satisfaction as I defied this heat here and now, knowing full well that these might very well be the last minutes I spent in this dreaded jungle. I was not going to miss it.

I made Rarity’s tent collapse with the proper command word and it refold itself into its less heavy, less impractical form. It still weighed a good deal, but knowing what luxuries waited inside, that was nothing. “Borrowing this thing was the best decision I made in this entire adventure,” I half-joked and levitated it over to my back. “And I’m going to show Rares my gratitude by… I don’t know… kissing her a thousand times or something.” Playing along to my tease, Celestia cleared her throat and I grinned a little wider. “On her cheek, of course.”

“That sounds like very sore lips,” she argued.

“And very sore cheeks, I suppose,” I added with a chuckle. “Hey… would you look at that?” Just by pure happenstance, I had shuffled my hoof around a little and there was the tiniest green thing poking through the soot and ashes. I bent my knees to lower myself down further and got a closer look at it. In retrospect however, I had no idea why I had done that. It was a plant. A seedling of some kind. I was no botanist, I had no idea what that was and getting a closer look did not help at all. Despite the random idiocy, I still smiled as I rose back up again. “The jungle really isn’t wasting any time. I bet there’s a bunch of greenery under this layer already.”

Celestia smiled serenely. “Life finds a way.”

The quote hit me so unexpectedly that I broke out in laughter. “Did you really just throw that quote at me?”

“I have no idea what you are talking about,” she claimed while she raised her head a little. And she had the most adorable pout I had ever seen on her face... and flicked her tail across my muzzle.

“D’aw, I could never stay mad at such a pretty pony princess!” I teased her a little more and nestled against her. And I snickered as I saw her puff out her cheeks. I pulled away and with a little spark of magic guided her muzzle down to me. “I love you.”

“That is so unfair,” she quietly sighed, but ultimately relented anyway. “I love you too.” And just as we pulled apart, she gave my lower lip a little nip.

I grinned. “You’ll have pranked me threefold by next week so my current pity is somewhat limited,” I whispered.

I took in the panorama of the Forbidden Jungle one last time. The dense vegetation surrounded us on all sides like the waves of an ocean, curved in soft slopes and hills, forming the occasional crest. It was an impressive landscape. One I would happily admire in paintings and pictures. Those were less hot, and less humid, and less stuffed with insects that were trying to eat me alive.

I did notice Soft Step though. “Huh. Look who’s come to say goodbye,” I said and pointed a hoof in his direction to make Sunny aware of him, “Or to make sure that we get the heck out of here.” I waved at him with a grin and he waved back with enthusiasm. Despite probably being tired beyond words. “You know… I think he likes me.”

Celestia giggled softly. “Is that so? And do you like him as well?”

“I’m… I’m usually a little more reserved,” I started and shifted a little uncomfortably. “He seems nice enough for what I know? I just don’t—“ And it had taken me that long to finally notice that mischievous tone in her voice. I glanced up at her and saw that playful mirth dancing around in her eyes. “Urgh. Not like that, you lecherous old mare!”

And she laughed.

She had always been a mare of self-restraint. Of control and composure. She smiled. A lot. It was part of her job, to a certain extent, to perfect a wide variety of smiles for a wide variety of situations. Some diplomatic in nature. Others less so. And in a way, this requirement had a snowball effect on her genuine smiles. The one Celestia sported and not the Princess.

But it was rare to hear her laugh. Actually, genuinely laugh. It was such a beautiful sound.

“I cannot help it,” she claimed once she had calmed down a little. “Despite my demands, my sister seems to forget time and again that I asked her not to tell me about all the things you two get up to… firecracker.”

I was genuinely shocked. I stared at her, wide-eyed and mouth hanging open, unable to process any thoughts, while a crushing wave of heat lit up my cheeks and ears and everything else that was even remotely able to blush.

How could she…?!

Luna must have known what she was doing. There was no way she did not. No way.

I felt a little like dying due to embarrassment and I failed to unfreeze myself. Celestia eventually noticed that her little quip had been a tad too much. “Goodness, I might have miscalculated that,” she murmured more to herself than to me. She pulled me against her side with a wing and charged her horn.

We reappeared in her bedchamber in Canterlot Palace. And I was quickly ushered to said bed. I could not tell what I was even thinking. Maybe nothing at all, actually. I was just frozen and it took some time to get out of that state. I eventually managed to shake myself free and slowly raised my head to meet her gaze. “C-Could you… uhm… n-not use that name again… p-please?” I asked with the meekest voice I had ever heard from myself.

Celestia sat right in front of me. With me being propped up on the bed and her sitting on her haunches before it, we were almost on eye level. Almost. And I still found it difficult to look up. There was a mixture of embarrassment and panic twisting my stomach, with miniscule traces of anger and indignation. I really ought to have a talk with Luna later on…

She had crossed a line here. One I admittedly had not been aware of. And while I was very panicky right now, a smaller, more relaxed part of me knew that eventually, I would cool down, calm down and we would sit down and talk about this like mature adults. With a lot less drama and tension than I currently envisioned.

But such things were hard to believe in the heat of the moment.

Lucky for me, Celestia knew me quite well. An apology had probably been her first impulse, but she knew that it would sail straight over my head. In one side, out the other, with no effect whatsoever. In situations like these, I tended to react more favorably to actions. And since she was not about to slap me, kissing me had probably been the next best option. One I did not mind at all.

It was admittedly hard to enjoy it at first. She told her. Luna told her. What is she thinking of me now? I dared not to look her in the eyes out of insecurity and shame. But our lips met and it sent a shock through my entire body. It felt like short-circuiting. As my brain slowly restarted, I melted more and more into her embrace and into her kiss. Until I inevitably felt the urge to become a little bit more proactive. But as soon as I pressed into her and tried to pull her up onto the bed with me, she pulled away.

I was not pouting. Not at all.

“I am sorry,” she apologized with a guilty smile. “I had not intended to make you feel uncomfortable.”

I grimaced a little. “It’s… been less than a month or so. Since she coined that pet name.” Because this was clearly about the name. And not about what it was associated with. I sighed and shook my head. “It’s alright, I just got caught in a headlight.” I looked around and only now truly realized we had teleported back home. With this jungle adventure coming to a close, it felt strange to return here. For these first few minutes, it felt like returning to a life long lost or left behind. As if it had been years since last we had shared this bed, or stepped hoof into this room.

According to the light filtering in through the windows, it was late morning. A whole day ahead of us. I still felt tired though. And the shock still rattled my bones a little which contributed to the exhaustion. I considered just falling onto my back and sleeping. But I knew there were tasks waiting.

Depluming Luna at some point, for example. But the more immediate ones that sprang to mind were mostly related to Rarity’s tent. I needed to refill her salt- and pepper shaker. I needed to clean her rugs, her bedsheets, her bed-everything. I still had to clean the bedside table’s feet from soot, and I needed to wash the entire blanket we had used. Restocking the upstairs bathroom, and maybe even researching what her little collection of concentrated flavors was worth. Maybe I could add a couple as a little ‘thank you’.

“I should get started on the tent,” I mumbled.

Celestia had waited patiently and nodded. “Alright. I will talk to the guards at the door and inform them of our return — and that I do not wish to be disturbed yet, aside from emergencies. I will also take care of a few other little things.”

“Sounds good,” I replied absentmindedly as I already worked on my checklist of what to do in which order.

She walked over to the door and soon after, I heard her converse with the guards outside. I did not make out any words, as I focused more on my own after-vacation-business. Her bedchamber was decadent both in the materials used to construct it, the art used to decorate it, as well as its sheer dimensions. The ceiling, for example, was high enough for me to open Rarity’s tent in here. It admittedly took away most of the free space the room had left, but I just needed to enter it and fetch all the things that needed cleaning. Soon enough, a little pile formed just outside the tent as I diligently worked my way through the ground floor and finally the upstairs. I returned outside with my armor as I had discarded that in the bathroom last night when we returned from our encounter. And that was the last piece.

With everything outside now, the tent collapsed once more and I started sorting the pile of work. I had a lot more piles soon enough, but at least things were organized. Our Neverend bottles stood on a little table nearby. I was curious about how much water was still inside them but I refrained from testing that. I could play around with the smaller parts later on. Work first. The rest of the Allfood was lying right beside the bottles. It would have been enough for another three days, maybe. More if we had continued to stretch our supplies with whatever we managed to scavenge from the jungle. I made a little note on a piece of paper and stuck it to the rest of the Allfood to remind myself to tell Luna — and possibly the kitchen staff — about our little experimentation with Allfood stew and other variants. Quite frankly though, despite this stuff being a really good option as a field ration, I was glad that I would not have to see or eat any of it for quite some time. And I looked forward to Spike's cuisine sooo much.

The biggest pile was all the stuff that needed washing, of course. I considered my two primary options — those being to sully my love’s bathroom and do it myself or burden the castle staff with even more work, but thereby ensuring it would be done with the best quality possible. I was then suddenly picked up by telekinesis.

“Uhm… I’m in the middle of something here…?” I half-heartedly protested. The Allfood would not spoil for another few weeks, at least. The bedsheets would not run away. There was no urgency to my task, per se. It was just my sense of duty preventing me from not protesting.

My curiosity as to where she carried me was quickly sated. The bathroom apparently. And Celestia put me down right at the edge of her ludicrously sized bathtub. “Well, yes,” I started, “I can see both the appeal and the necessity of a bath. However, I was thinking that maybe I get that work outside done beforehoof? Before I get soot all over my coat?”

Celestia sat down beside me while the water flooded the tub and applied some really nice smelling oils to it. At length, she finally turned to me and her smile grew a little. “I informed just about anypony I needed to inform of anything. The castle staff will take care of our laundry, the guards will inform my sister of our return and the kitchen staff will have something nice waiting for us as soon as we return to my chamber.”

“I could have washed it myself,” I grumbled quietly and puffed my cheeks up. It was about the principle really, I did not insist on doing it myself.

“You could have,” she replied and immediately called it, “but you do not truly wish to. There is a reason Spike is doing the laundry at Twilight’s castle. And as much as I think that Rarity would have appreciated the effort and personal touch, I think she will appreciate this even more.”

I slumped a little against her. “Fine.” She was not wrong, of course. Spike would not even allow Twilight to even help with laundry. Last time she had tried to automate the process by animating all the tools. It looked fun at first. Until it did not anymore. And while I was not exactly exiled from the laundry room, I rarely asked to help him either. It was just such a tedious task. That being said, I saw no reason to admit to any of that. Especially at this moment.

Once the water level was sufficiently high, we walked in and sighed both deeply as the warm water enveloped us. For just a moment, I chuckled about the absurdity of the situation. I could not stand the heat in the jungle, but this water was probably even hotter than the air in there and it was most certainly wetter, but this was fine and the jungle was not.

Ah well.

I fetched a sponge with my magic when said sponge was suddenly taken from me by a considerably stronger aura. “Thief,” I muttered. A moment later a splash of water poured down on my muzzle.

“No name-calling, or I will think twice about being nice to you,” she chided me from behind. She lathered my back with soap before she brushed the sponge along its length.

It was such a blissful sensation that I involuntarily shuddered a little. If this was what was waiting for me, I would be at my best manners. And indeed, she took her time and helped me clean up a bit. I sighed in deep contentment when she washed my mane using her hooves instead of her telekinesis. It felt heavenly. And I sighed. Again and again.

She was done eventually, of course. Or rather I was. It took me a couple of seconds to realize and break out of that stupor. “That… that was sooo nice,” I whispered before I turned around and kissed her deeply. “My turn,” I cooed.

She knew better than to object and I got to work with just about the same dedication and care as she had shown me before. Preening was usually something best done lying down on a bed or at least when wings were dry, but cleaning her wings and straightening out feathers under these conditions was an interesting experience as well. I scrubbed her back, employed a few massage techniques as well, and her sides, her neck, her belly and eventually arrived at her rump. She hummed and sighed appreciatively every now and then and it was more than clear how utterly relaxed she was.

I was still determined to top that.

With the same care I had deployed so far, I cleaned and rinsed her tail. And I made use of the simple fact that even in its ethereal state, her tail — if wet — clung to her flank. With both hooves placed firmly on her cutie mark, I gave her a tentative, long lick and listened as her initial, quiet gasp turned into a soft, barely audible moan. And knowing that she was open to the idea was all I needed to know, really.

In the end, our bath had taken more than an hour, maybe even two. But we were technically still on vacation. Free to do what we wanted. Free to laze around. We emerged back into her chamber and just as she had announced previously, there was a trolley waiting for us with little metal domes covering our still warm food.

“I believe they call it brunch,” Celestia mused while we laid down on her bed with the trolley pulled up to its edge.

I nodded. “Yupp. Breakfast and lunch. Too late for the former, to early for the latter. I honestly never quite understood the need for this title. It’s a meal. Does it matter when exactly you have it? I mean, the kitchen staff would probably hunt me down for that. Something about how you’re only supposed to eat certain things at certain times of day. It’s all just a big pile of hooey.”

She giggled beside me while she simultaneously let her primaries lazily trail along my back. “’Hooey’? Really?”

I thought about it for a moment, but ultimately shrugged. “What? Too much Applejack?”

“Hm. Maybe,” she replied with a smile before biting down on another piece of bruschetta.

“You do realize that AJ doesn’t have a monopoly on idioms and weird curses and whatnot, right?” I asked with a lopsided grin.

“I am not quite so sure. Have you told her?” she teased right back. “You know, I am The Princess Celestia, I could just give her a monopoly on ‘idioms and weird curses and whatnot’…”

I snorted. “Day Court would have your hide for it. That’s way too much trouble to be worth the effort.”

“Are you calling me lazy?” she asked with a slightly threatening tone while she gave me her best indignant expression.

I leaned over and nipped at her neck. “Nope. I’m calling you resourceful. Totally different thing.”

I held her gaze for a couple of seconds before we both giggled. “I might make a diplomat of you yet…”

“Pch, not a chance,” I immediately refused with a chuckle. There was a short lull in our conversation where we simply continued to eat at a slow pace before I addressed something that had randomly popped into my head. “Say, with our return here, you’re in charge. Right? We talked about that. So I don’t mind a good, long bath, or lazing around with you. I love that. But I was wondering if there’s a plan to this?”

“Well yes, I have given it some thought,” she replied and bit down on a grape and enjoyed the juicy mixture of sweet and sour. “You are free to take me out to dinner tomorrow evening. And I will treat you to another play at the orchestra afterwards. Sounds good?”

I grinned. “Already love it. Although I can’t help but notice that there’s a couple of hours unaccounted for until tomorrow evening.”

“Indeed,” she agreed, “I have yet to find a sufficiently appealing idea for tomorrow's earlier hours.”

“Alright. What about today then?” I inquired with a chuckle.

She sighed with a little more pathos than was strictly necessary to make her point. “To be honest, long-range teleportation does take a lot out of a mare and I will admit that after these last days, I have grown somewhat weary of running around, be it in jungles or otherwise. Do you still feel tired?”

“I do,” I admitted, but quickly added, “But it’s not too bad. I could go for whatever you have in mind.”

I had initially planned to be supportive of whatever idea she had. But when she turned her head to face me, I noticed that glint of a very specific playfulness in her eyes. “Is that so?” she asked and her voice grew quieter and gained an edge. “And here I thought our bath had exhausted you a little.” She leaned over further and slowly started to loom over me. “That will not do.”

Caught in indecisiveness between a chuckle and a gulp, I just did both and grinned. “I think I like where this is going…” Any further words would have been muffled anyway as she captured me for a hungry kiss that quickly grew more and more passionate. However, I had no intention of becoming her little morsel. As she tried to push me onto my back, I dared to defy her. In the middle of it, I quickly pulled away. “Ladies first,” I quipped before reconnecting. She did not seem opposed to the idea at first.

But my ‘plan’ to tire her out to the point where I could claim undisputed victory over her failed miserably as well as she quickly caught onto that.

I was utterly spent by the end of it. I clung to her side and wished I could purr like a kitten — so like Luna tended to do —, even though I had my doubts I would have had the energy left to do even that. My love was no better off herself. “I could go for another bath,” she murmured and after a second or two of silence, we both giggled.

“Later,” I promised.

“Are you tired now, love?” she asked with an undertone that I was ready to perceive as a threat this time, even if it was not meant as one.

“Very much so, yes,” I replied with a happy sigh and leaned over to nuzzle her shoulder. “I will, to my very last breath, stubbornly insist that I can’t get enough of you… but right now, sleepy time sounds nice…”

“I see no reason not to mix sleepy time and snuggle time,” she replied even quieter as she slowly drifted off. “Ropes and blindfolds will have to wait for later.“

“Hmmm… I love the sound of that…” I checked one last time that I was nestled as close to her as I could and that I held her tightly to me before I let my own eyes fall shut. What had I learned from my very first adventure?, I wondered, while consciousness slowly faded. Well. Mostly that I preferred my less tedious indoor-adventures. And that we needed to go on more vacations.

And that I would stuff a pillow with Luna’s feathers.