Twilight couldn’t sleep. It wasn’t that her guest quarters in the Crystal Empire weren’t comfortable, they certainly were, but her mind couldn’t stop replaying the scenes she’d seen in the last three days.
“Spike, get this down-” Twilight began, then remembered the dragon was back in Ponyville. Blast. She’d have to write it down herself. Still staying in bed, she cast a light spell and levitated a quill and parchment, thinking aloud as she wrote.
“‘Making Shining a new suit,’ she said, hmm. A new suit. She went all the way to the Crystal Empire to make Shining a suit? And she barely brought any supplies, although I guess she could buy it here… But she hasn’t been to the market…”
Twilight recalled the first excursion she had seen Rarity go on: she’d gone to the hot springs, and then a few minutes later Shining went to the hot springs, with no guards.
“That could be normal,” Twilight chided herself, “Shining doesn’t always travel with an honour guard, even though he spends sooooo much time training them, maybe he just wanted to relax at the hot springs, same as Rarity…”
Then there was the New Years’ address. Cadance had been calming Flurry after one of her tantrums, so Shining had delivered it…
Rarity had whispered in his ear as he went to the balcony, and Shining had blushed. Then her big brother had asked Rarity, not Twilight, to stand in for Cadance. That wasn’t normal, was it?
“Not normal behaviour,” she mused, “Not normal at all. Hmm. And when I tried to find Shining afterwards he wasn’t with Cadance and Flurry, she didn’t even know where he was. Hmmmmmm…”
Twilight thought of the family dinner that same night, to which Rarity had been inexplicably invited. She kept giving strange looks to Cadance the whole time, staring at her while Cadance wasn’t looking. There was a glint in Rarity’s eyes that Twilight had just barely noticed, before Rarity had caught her looking and snapped back to small talk.
“Evil looks at Cadance,” she wrote. “Hmmmm…”
Twilight stared at the scroll for a moment, jotting down a couple more thoughts and signs. Then she gasped. Then she started crying.
***
Twilight dragged herself down the stairs, bags heavy under her bloodshot eyes. She hadn’t slept all night, and she just knew that when she went down to the kitchen to get breakfast she’d run into-
Her. Rarity’s eyes widened with concern as she trotted towards Twilight.
“Oh, Twilight, whatever is the matter? You look simply dreadful darling, did you miss a night of sleep?”
Twilight glared at the fashionista. She was wearing a high-necked cloak, totally unnecessary in the palace. Concealing love-bites? Twilight leaned in, still staring at her.
“Um, Twilight? If you want I can bring you breakfast in bed, I was just coming down to…”
Twilight leaned in even closer. She could smell the faint scent of rosemary perfume, and just a little bit of sweat.
“You should wash up,” Twilight hissed, “I’ll be perfectly all right.”
Rarity blinked, staring confusedly after Twilight as the alicorn left without getting anything to eat.
On her way back up to her room, she passed by Shining and Cadance’s room, the door ajar. Shining was lounging asleep on a couch with a blissful look on his face. Twilight’s eye twitched.
She gently snuck in, making sure he was asleep and casting a noise-dampening spell just to be sure. Leaning very close to her brother, she detected the same rosemary scent.
Tears welled up in Twilight’s eyes as she backed away from her sleeping brother.
“How could you do this?” Twilight whispered, “How could you do this to Cadance? How could you?”
Her head hung low, Twilight slowly walked back to her own room. Rarity. Her friend, Rarity. How could she do this? Twilight tried and tried to think of any other explanation, but she couldn’t. This social climber had wrapped Shining around her hoof and was destroying their marriage! How could Cadance not see? Maybe she did, but just didn’t want to admit it. Maybe Flurry kept her so tired she didn’t notice what her so-called friend was doing in their marriage bed. Maybe…
Twilight kept thinking like that for over an hour, until she couldn’t stand it any more. Using the connection she still shared with that horrible homewrecking fashionista through being element bearers, Twilight cast a spell to lock onto her. As long as she was in the same city… there. Twilight poured power into her horn, subtly manipulating the flow of magic, creating a tunnel through space and pulling the white mare through.
With a POOF! Rarity appeared in Twilight’s bedroom, then crashed to the ground. Her mane was a mess, and she was naked except for a black blindfold and a strand of pink silk ribbon tying her forehooves together.
“Ack!” she squealed, “That hurts, crystal, crystal!”
Rarity struggled, snapping the ribbon and pulling the blindfold off. Twilight gave a withering glare down at her as she looked around in confusion, then scrambled to her hooves.
“T- Twilight?” Rarity said, looking up at the alicorn as Twilight got down from off her own bed.
“Yes,” Twilight grated, “It’s me. You know, that pony you call friend. How. Dare. You?”
“How dare I-”
“How dare you!” Twilight shouted, “How dare you destroy my brother’s marriage? Tell me!”
“Oh…” Rarity looked down at herself, “Well, darling, you have brought me here in a rather compromising position, but if you let me-”
“Tell me! How could you do this?”
Rarity started backing up as Twilight’s horn lit up.
“Now Twi, please, it’s really, honestly not what you think it is, I mean yes, your brother and I are-”
“You homewrecker! I hate you I hate you I hate you!” Twilight screamed, levitating Rarity off the ground, “I’m gonna give you right to Cadance right now and you’ll get to see just what happens to ponies who mess with the Princess of Love!”
“Oh darling,” Rarity snort-laughed. That was too much for Twilight, who cast a silencing spell on the fashionista.
As Twilight turned to march out of her bedroom, homewrecker in tow, Shining Armour burst into the room. He was similarly naked, although that wasn’t unusual. He wasn’t able to figure out what was going on before Twilight started yelling at him.
“Big Brother, why?” she demanded, “Why? How could you? What did she do to make you betray Cadance?”
Shining blinked.
“Uh, Twilight-”
“Was Cadance not good enough for you? Did you just get bored? Did she just not want to fuck you after giving birth to Flurry? Whatever it is I don't care how could you?!”
“Well, Twilight,” Shining began, but Twilight immediately started marching past him. “I don’t care what it was! Cadance can decide what to-”
Shining sighed, and put a barrier spell around Twilight, trapping her in a bubble of force. The telekinesis spell holding Rarity abruptly ended, dropping Rarity to the ground with another crash. The fashionista scampered behind Shining.
“Thank you dearest,” said Rarity, “I was beginning to get worried.”
“Alright sis,” Shining declared, “You need to calm down if I’m going to give you an answer. It really, truly, is not what you think it is. It is true that Rarity and I have been intimate with each other, but-”
Shining Armour, of course, had never fully processed what it meant that his little sister was now an Alicorn Princess. While he spoke, Twilight had concentrated enough power in her horn to easily shatter the force bubble her brother had projected.
The broken bubble turned into an expanding shockwave, which momentarily stunned both Rarity and Shining and sent them flying through the door, out into the hallway. When they came to, they found Twilight standing over both of them with pure rage in her eyes.
“That’s it,” Twilight snarled, “I’m gonna-”
“Twilight Sparkle!” she heard Cadance yell. Looking up from the unfaithful ponies beneath her, Twilight saw Cadance storming towards them, gesturing to a pair of confused-looking guards to leave.
“What in Celestia’s name are you doing, Twilight?”
“Rarity is fucking Shining!” Twilight yelled.
“Of course she is,” snapped Cadance. Twilight was momentarily stunned. “Now, you leave those two alone.”
Twilight’s jaw dropped open. Cadance’s mane was also dishevelled, and there was a powerful scent of rosemary perfume surrounding her.
“You, but, she, but he-” Twilight stammered, the magical energies swirling around her suddenly dying like a becalmed windstorm.
“I was trying to tell you, Twilight,” said Shining.
“But you kept getting angrier and angrier,” finished Rarity.
“So… you… and Shining… and Cadance?”
Cadance rolled her eyes.
“Go to bed, Twilight. You need some rest. And I need to bring these two beautiful ponies back to my bedroom.”
Twilight blinked, watching Shining and Cadance walk away. Rarity looked up at her, making a pitying coo and brushing against her.
“I really must catch up with them, Twilight dearest, but we’ll talk after you’ve gotten some rest, hmm?”
Twilight nodded, still not quite sure what had happened. As Rarity turned to go, she walked back into her bedroom in a daze.
***
Dear Princess Celestia,
Sometimes just because one of your best friends is screwing your married brother, it doesn’t mean she’s a homewrecker. Sometimes she’s also screwing your sister-in-law. And that’s fine.
Your Faithful Student,
-Twilight Sparkle.
Twilight looked at the letter. No. Best to keep this friendship lesson to herself.
Author's Note
So there we go. A little humorous polyamory story. Happy Pride y'all :)
UPDATE: There is now a voice recording of Homewrecker, by Skijaramaz - Tone Shift. It is very high quality. Check it out right here!
