It was a cool summer's day in Canterlot. The town was bustling like normal, ponies chattering away about the usual topics of the day. Equestrian imperialism, daily monster attacks, too many zebra immigrants, etc. All seemed well until the princess of the sun woke up. She yawned, and then proceeded to get out of her bed. But when she turned around to make her bed for the following evening, she noticed a wet spot in the shape of herself which she was sleeping in.
"Oh my, I must have been sweating quite a bit." Celestia thought to herself. As she spoke those words, she noticed a bad flavor in her mouth.
"I hope I'm not getting sic-" she cut off her own thought to reassure herself that she couldn't have been, she was a goddess! Goddesses don't get sick. She removed her sheets and put them in her hamper so they could be washed by the servants later. As she made her way down to Luna's chambers, she started to feel a pounding in her head. The taste in her mouth was still there, even after thoroughly brushing her teeth. She was right in front of Luna's door and began knocking. "Luna? It's time for me to raise the sun."
Luna, being the hardcore gamer that she was, and running her own Tumblr called Gamer Luna, was busy fragging noobs in the latest Call of Duty abomination. She was in the zone, you could say, but upon hearing the loud, booming knocking of her older sibling she immediately zoned back to reality and paused the game, calling out "Yes, come in."
Celestia opened her sister's door, reeling back from the smell of sweat, Doritos and Mountain Dew. She clamped a hoof over her muzzle and began to speak in a nasally voice, "Luna, you REALLY need to take better care of your room and yourself, it smells like you haven't showered in a week!"
Celestia remember her own sweat filled bed... She walked past her sister and out on the balcony. Taking deep breaths, she prepared her mind and body for the huge task of raising the sun.
Her concentration was broken when Luna yelled out "WHAT THE BUCK, I SHOT YOU LIKE FIFTEEN TIMES YOU FUCKING HACKER!" Celestia jumped back from the sudden vulgar outburst coming from her sister’s lips, and then stared at Luna.
"Sister, first, it's like 4 am. Ponies are sleeping, second you are royalty, and royalty does not behave like that, now could you PLEASE refrain from making noise? I have a major headache and you screaming while I'm trying to raise a 1.98892 Nonillion kilogrampound ball of heat is NOT helping it!" Celestia commented, agitated.
Luna heaved a sigh of impatience. "If you only came in here to nag me about personal hygiene and keeping the noise level down, then could you just leave? I'm right in the middle of- AW WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT? HE CAME OUTTA FUCKING NOWHERE!" Luna slammed her controller on the hard floor, and then got out of bed to reach her 2-liter Mountain Dew bottle that was resting at her nightstand. As she got out of bed however, a wave of musty fumes came cascading outward from the spot she was sitting on and spread throughout the room like wildfire. Luna grabbed the half-empty bottle and chugged it down her throat, downing the rest of it in a single gulp.
Celestia sighed, she closed the balcony doors and began the process of preparing. After a few minutes of preparation, she began to focus her magic. The moment she began to raise the sun, she experienced the sharpest of a thousand pains. Her horn glowed a sickly combination of yellow and green. She tried to power through it, but with every second her magic was focused on the sun, the pain intensified. After a few moments, she screamed, and after a few more, she collapsed with a heavy thud.
Luna, looking at the TV screen with contempt, quickly cocked her head in Celestia's direction after hearing that dreadful scream. "Omigosh! Tia, are you alright?! What happened sister?!" she shouted in a concerned voice, opening the balcony doors once more.
Luna attempted to revive her sister's unconscious form with her magic, and it almost worked, but then lost focus when she realized that the sun wasn't being raised. Looking squarely at the sun, she planted her hooves firmly apart, and concentrated with all her might at the blazing ball of gas in the sky. But alas, it wasn't meant to be. Being the younger sister also meant not being as strong as the older sister. Luna gazed downward to the Royal Guards poised at the bottom of her tower, their shift coming to a close. She shrieked, her voice in full on Royal Canterlot mode. "GUARDS. WE DEMAND THAT YOU MAKE HASTE UP HERE AS OUR SISTER HAS FALLEN ILL AND NEEDS URGENT CARE."
The two guards jumped at the sudden shriek, but zoomed up the castle, galloping as fast as they could to Her Highness' room, where they reeled back at the sight of Celestia upon entering through the large oak doors. They brought a stretcher and put Celestia on it. They walked up to Luna and asked "Your Highness! What has happened to our dear goddess of the sun?"
Luna explained that Celestia came into her room while she was playing video games, lecturing her about her declining hygiene. Then she proceeded to raise the sun from Luna's balcony, let out an ear-splitting scream, and then collapsed with no sign of consciousness whatsoever. "I just don't know what went wrong!" Luna added, terrified of what could end up happening to her big sister.
The guards nodded, "Do not worry, Your Highness! We will get the best doctors in all Equestria to tend to her right away!" A crowd had formed at Luna's door. The two guards began pushing the stretcher out of the room. The unconscious Celestia got into a violent coughing fit, going limp again after finishing. A bit of blood was on her muzzle.
Luna anxiously watched as dozens of medical scientists invaded the palace and examined Celestia from all angles. They checked her reflexes in her joints, checked for strep throat, checked for ticks, checked for any STDs, and finally put her through a CT scan machine. One of the most experienced doctors, Dr. Mario, finally came up with the solution to Celestia's sudden sickness. "She has...", -insert drum roll- "the common cold." He announced.
Celestia moaned, and began to get up, leaning against the tables and machines for balance. "Awww, buck... My head." She began another violent coughing fit, this one even worse than before. Tears formed in her eyes. "I'm a goddess! How could this be happening to me?" she cried out. She was coated in sweat and her head was pounding, any attempts to use her magic resulted in pain. She tried speaking to Dr. Mario but vomited all over him.
Dr. Mario scoffed at the unladylike-ness of the Princess, and immediately took his leave. "The bill still stands. I want my money by Friday," the doctor haughtily said. Everybody who was gathered around Celestia was relieved that she was alive, but all hopes of her being healthy were dashed upon hearing the violent coughing fit she was suffering from. One of the Royal Guards asked, "Shouldn't we like...put her to bed or something?"
"That doctor is a dick," Celestia silently said to herself. She cleared her throat and said in a much louder voice "Bedrest sounds lovely, but could I get some water please? I have a HORSE throat." After downing some water, she attempted to walk to her bedroom, only making it about three feet before falling on her face, causing her to moan in pain. "Owww...." She suddenly remembered the bill. "Luna! How much do we owe that doctor?"
Luna looked over the bill that was sitting on a nearby table. "Says here that we owe the Doc 2000 bits...wait, 2000 BITS?! That's absurd!" One of the Royal Guards peered at Celestia, who had her rear end in the air. He could have sworn he had seen something pink but decided not to stare for too long for fear of being caught.
Another guard faced Luna and asked, "Your Highness, should we take the sickly Princess to her bedchambers?"
"Yes, you go do that while I sort this bill thing out," Luna replied.
The group marched to Celestia's bedchambers and laid her down as gently as they could.
"Thank you, my royal subjects. You are dismissed. And try to make it not so obvious when you stare!" Celestia chided, causing the guards to blush and promptly leave as quick as they could lest the Princess decide dungeon time was in order.
Celestia tried to get comfortable, but her muscles were sore as sore could get. Goddesses weren't supposed to get sick! It was unheard of in history for alicorns to become ill. "How in Equestria did this happen to me? I’ve made mistakes in the past but nothing warranting this. Hopefully this’ll all be over soon," she said to herself before succumbing to another violent coughing fit.
A few hours went by and the Royal Guards outside her door changed shifts, with a new pair of guards standing at the doors, prepared to protect their Princess with their life. However, they hadn't been told of Celestia's newfound "disease" so to speak, and when they heard a series of coughs and sneezes coming from her room, they were shocked, to say the least.
"Is the Princess alright?" One guard asked to the other, who could only shrug. Luna, who decided not to pay a damn cent on the Doctor's bill, was trotting down the hall in a pure white nurse outfit, custom fit to her stature. Buttons lined the middle, and she sported a pink nurse hat with a red cross on it. She still hadn't bathed in a while, so she was a nurse that smelled a little rank. A rank nurse.
Minutes passed, and a bedridden Celestia became increasingly bored. She tried bouncing a ball off the wall in a vain attempt to entertain herself. "This sucks," she said bluntly.
Not knowing what else to do, she grabbed a book that Twilight Sparkle had sent to her. "Fifty Shades of Neigh? Sound's mysterious..." She began reading it and after a few chapters her face showed she was not amused. She threw the book as hard as she could with her achy limbs, shouting "This isn't a story! It's just porn!" The book hit Luna in the face as she walked in. Celestia gasped, for more reason than one. "Luna! Sorry about that. What are you wearing?"
Luna's mane had become a bit ruffled from the sudden book-to-the-face. Using her magical powers, she started fluffing up her mane to make it look presentable once more. "Well, aside from being attacked by a book, I'm here to take care of you. This nurse outfit is just something I put together so I could look like a real nurse! Now, may I ask why you chose to chuck a book at me?" She looked at the book in question, which had opened up to a random page upon hitting the floor. Luna picked up the book and read aloud, "Honeysuckle moaned in ecstasy as her lover, Golden Retriever, swatted her flank with his brown rope-like whip. With every pound, her flank would grow redder and so would her face. 'Oh yes! Harder Golden! Punish me harder!' Luna, cheeks crimson red, peered over the book at Celestia with a look of dismay.
"Shut up!” screeched Celestia. Her face was scrunched up and slightly blushing. “That book is just porn in word form. It has assaulted my seeing reticles and forever tainted my literal purity. Now don't you have royal duties? I'm sure as co-ruler of Equestria you must have work, especially with me sick!"
"Actually, I took the day off and appointed a temporary Prime Minister to take my place until you get better," Luna had a gleam in her eye. "Oh, won't this be exciting sister!?" Luna got right in Celestia's face. "You look simply terrible! We need to take your temperature!" Luna pulled a thermometer out of Celestia knows where and pointed it at Celestia's mouth. "Now open wide."
"Where the heck did you get th-" Celestia was interrupted by a thermometer jammed in her mouth. She sighed and allowed Luna to take her temperature. ‘Might as well see what it says’ she thought.
The thermometer beeped and Luna pulled it out. "92...Wait what?" Luna tapped the tiny LCD screen to see if the reading would change to something more accurate.
"This thing doesn't seem to be working." She stamped a hoof on the ground in annoyance. "How else am I going to take your temperatur-" She cut herself off mid-sentence. "Idea!" She proclaimed, as a lit lightbulb appeared over her head. Luna gravitated another thermometer towards Celestia. "Now sister, I'm going to need you to spread your legs."
Celestia's expression immediately dropped, and a deep flush came over her face. "What?! Why in my name would I do that? That's an oral thermometer, right?" She clamped her legs together and stared at Luna with big eyes, hoping it was, in fact not a rectal one.
"No, it's not an oral thermometer silly. Why would I try to insert an oral thermometer inside your rectum? That's just silly Tia. But I am serious, though. I won't find out how sick you are until you get this over with," Luna explained with impatience lacing her words.
With that, Celestia’s mouth erupted a stream of vomit like a coursing river, with all the force of a great typhoon. "You can’t do that! Who knows how many bums that's been in?!"
"It’s a necessary measure Tia. Now excuse me while I go shower this vomit off me." She rolled off the bed and walked towards the bathroom, dripping with vomit. "Nasty motherfucker." She mumbled to herself.
Celestia felt bad about vomiting on her sister. A few minutes later, she saw Luna come back out of the shower. Celestia looked down in shame and then back up at Luna. "I-I'm sorry..." Celestia knew in a few minutes, things were going to get very awkward. "Didn't mean for that to happen," she stated meekly.
Luna was drying her ears off with her towel. "Nah, don't sweat it. I needed a shower anyway. Now, back to business. This thermometer must go inside you. The hole in your face didn't work, so that only leaves me with the other two. Your choice." Luna was tapping her hoof on the ground waiting for her sibling's response.
"Ummm... Do YOU have to do it? Can't I like, do it myself? In the bathroom or something?" She was trying her best to have her sister as far away from her ladyparts as possible, her face becoming more redder by the minute.
"Well yeah of course you're gonna do it. I wouldn't dream of doing it myself. Take the thermometer and hurry up," Luna handed the small tube to her sister. "When you hear the beep, take it out. Do you need any help getting out of bed?"
"N-No. I'm fine, thank you." Slowly but surely, Celestia got out of her bed. She grabbed the thermometer and went into the bathroom. A few moments later, a small "eep!" was heard, and then a beep. Celestia slowly walked out of the bathroom and handed Luna the thermometer.
When the thermometer touched Luna's hoof she jumped. "Gross Tia! I don't want that thing touching me!" She held it up with her telekinetic powers and saw the reading. "106. Ooh, you got it bad sister. But don't worry, Nurse Luna is here to help! I got just the thing to help you get back on your hooves! It's a simple home remedy that mother used to make when one of us got a cold, the only problem is, the main ingredient is breast milk."
‘Seriously Mom?!’ was all Celestia could think, clearly flustered with the idea. "Where are we going to get that?"
Luna thought Celestia was joking. "You're kidding right? Breast milk only comes from one place." She pointed at Celestia's lower body. Luna had that innocent gleam in her eyes that gave the impression that she didn't think any of this was weird. Frankly, it was a little creepy. "Stop being a baby. I thought you wanted to get better,” Luna said.
"But sister! I'm sick! What if it’s contaminated?! Besides, how did you even get the recipe for this? Why am I only learning about this now? And another thing, since when did we get colds, or sick in general? We're immortal. You say mom used this when we felt ill as children, but I can’t recall ever being this sick before in my long life." Celestia’s weary mind was racing with dozens of questions and concerns.
Luna accepted the onslaught of questions with ease. "Your breast milk doesn't get contaminated from a simple common cold or a high fever. Would you rather drink mine? Mother wrote the recipe down for us eons ago. I didn’t realize you weren’t aware. You must be getting Alzheimer's,” Luna snickered. “Normally alicorns don't get sick, but sometimes nature throws a curveball at us and bam! We get sick, although not nearly as much as normal ponies."
Celestia’s head was spinning too much to ask any more questions but scoffed at the insult. "If my milk is okay, then I guess I'd rather use that... You don't find any of this strange at all Luna? Not even a bit?"
Luna brought a milk pumping contraption out of nowhere and sat it down on the bed. There were two yellow suction lids, whose purpose was to be attached to the teats. "What about this is strange to you? I'm trying to take care of my sick big sister and you find it weird of me to do so? I think you're the weird one here. I'll need you to spread your legs again."
Celestia looked at Luna with a very confused face. "What the buck are legs?"
Luna gave her a blank stare. "Are you delusional? You know, legs! The things you walk wit- oh wait, you're making fun of me for saying you had Alzheimer’s, aren't you? Haha, very funny. I still need you go spread em' though."
Celestia laughed. She joked when she was nervous. Deciding it was to just get it over with, she slowly started to spread her legs in front of her sister.
Luna took one look at her older sister's teats and stifled a laugh. "Why is one bigger than the other?" She stifled a giggle, but quickly got back to business. Using da magickz, she placed the yellow lids on the nipples.
"This might tickle a little bit sister," she stated as she flipped the switch on the machine and the pumps started doing their magic.
"Buck off…" She frowned, but it was hard to keep due to the tickling sensation on her teats. She even giggled once or twice.
"How much longer is this going to take?" she asked, not enjoying the current situation she found herself in, even though it would be hard to tell due to her giggling.
Luna rolled her eyes at her sister's giggling fits. "When the cup in the machine gets full," she pointed a hoof at the glass cup firmly tucked inside the machine, "then it'll be done. Until then you'll just have to deal with it." The cup was only about a tenth full. Luna snuggled up close to Celestia. "So, what have you been up to lately?" she inquired innocently.
Celestia sighed and accepted her fate. A conversation would help keep her mind off it. "I've been sick,” she deadpanned. “You?”
Luna chuckled after hearing that, putting a hoof around her sister's neck. "I meant before you were sick, duh!"
"Well, I was going to have some files filed and then have a meeting with some of my assistants. Boring royal stuff, which you don't do,” Celestia curtly replied.
Luna cast an indignant look at her sister. "I do royal stuff! Just last night I helped a little pegasus filly face her fear of riding bicycles! How dare you imply I’m a lazy slacker!"
"Oooh. Dream wanderer. Sooooo hard," Celestia teased. "What if somebody was dreaming about you, and you and you met, and it was like INCEPTION?" Celestia was always curious about her sister’s ability to go into ponies’ dreams. It made her a tad envious, but she didn't think too much of it.
Luna gave a smirk at her sister's remark on her unique abilities. "You know I was in your dreams once Tia. I saw a certain fetish that you partake in. One that ponies might think badly of you for. It was you and a royal guard doing -" She cut her rant when she heard the pump machine go flaccid and come to a stop. Luna removed the suction lids, took out the large glass of milk, and placed the machine back into oblivion. With the glass in tow, she teleported to the kitchen to have it made into the remedy.
Celestia turned bright red. "I should kick you in the ovaries for that!" She tried to hit Luna but was too weak to do anything. "You're mean!" she cried at Luna’s dissipating magic. She knew it was childlike but said it anyway.
Luna was magically shitted onto the unforgiving kitchen floor. The head chef was there making dinner for the two princesses. Luna looked around for the ingredients she desperately needed. Celery, mustard, a hot dog, sugar, and gravy.
The head chef was trying his best to cook something to cater to Celestia’s current state. He noticed Luna searching about while combing through his cookbook. "Your Highness! What is it that you need from our kitchen? Perhaps I could be of some aid?" He bowed at Luna, an earnest smile covering his features.
Luna looked behind her to see the head chef offering his assistance. "That's very thoughtful. I need two sticks of celery, a can of mustard, one hot dog with nothing on it, three tablespoons of sugar, and a half cup of gravy. When you get those things, I need you to get a big mixing bowl for me to mix this brea- I mean, stuff in with the ingredients," Luna proclaimed in a hurried fashion.
The chef, who knew the kitchen like the back of his hoof, moved as fast as he could and within moments everything was in a bowl ready for Luna to mix. "Here you are, Your Highness! May I ask, what is it you need this odd combination of ingredients for?"
Luna put a hoof to her chin, wondering if she should reveal the secret recipe to him. "Alright, I'll tell you. But you must promise to keep it a secret. I'm making a special home remedy that mother used to make when we caught colds. It should get Celestia feeling peachy in a day or two."
He smiled, "Aw, that's sweet of you to help her in her time of need. Well, I'll see you too it, I have work to do. Please tell Her Majesty I hope she gets well soon!" He bolted back to his work, mixing and cutting various foods for the palace’s dinner that night.
After preparing the odd concoction, which was a stomach churning yellow, Luna teleported back to Celestia's bedchambers where she found her older sister rubbing her temples to ease her headache.
"Ah, you're back, took you lo- holy crap what is in that bowl?" Celestia exclaimed, staring at the sickly yellow soup in the bowl. It looked downright dreadful. Bubbles oozed from the center and the aroma smelled sweet at first but quickly overpowered her senses with the smell of spoiled vegetables. Sighing in resignation tried to grab the spoon sitting off to the side of the bowl and bring it to her mouth but fumbled it in her hoof and spilled the spoon’s contents on herself.
With a wide smile on her face, Luna happily said "Don't worry sis, I'll feed you." She gravitated the spoon away from Celestia's hoof, scooped up a bit of the soup, and pretended it was an airplane. "The Breast Milk express is coming in for landing!" she said in a mock pilot voice, "Requesting permission to land!"
Celestia frowned, not amused by her sister’s childish antics. She simply stared at Luna and then back at the spoon. Finally, with some trepidation, she opened her mouth. The whole situation was very humiliating for her.
Taking notice of her sister's embarrassed state, she asked "Why are you embarrassed? It's just soup. It's not like you could feed yourself even if you tried. Just cheer up! When you're done eating maybe we can have a fun match in Mario Kart!"
Celestia continued to let Luna feed her. The soup was okay at best. "Okay, Mario Kart sounds fun." She peered at her clock. 12:33 pm. Her eyes darted to her window. Spitting out the soup, she blurted "OH MY GOSH LUNA! The sun hasn't been up all day!"
"Don't worry about that Tia, it's all been taken care of. The Prime Minister I appointed declared that it was a solar eclipse that would last for at least a couple days. Just sit back and enjoy your-" she couldn't help but giggle, "milk." On the inside Luna was laughing her flank off, but on the outside, she wore no expression of laughter. Luna had a good poker face.
"You know Luna, I appreciate your help," Luna fed her the last bit of soup. "I hope this does something..." She hugged Luna tight.
Shocked by the sudden burst of affection, Luna simply said "Uh...thanks? Sis, you can let go now. It's Mario Kart time! I call the first controller!"
Mario kart time indeed, Celestia won a few times, but Luna was considerably better. In the last race, Celestia was in first place until a blue shell hit her, then a red shell, then a stray green shell, then a bullet bill, then a CPU with a star. "What the heck was that shit!" she yelled as she ended up dead last in the race.
Luna laughed hysterically at all the stuff being thrown Celestia’s way. "I can't believe you got last place! Omigosh, I'm gonna pee!" She was stomping her front hoof on the ground in hysterics and tears were everywhere.
Celestia huffed but eventually began laughing too as she caught up to Luna in their next race. The blue alicorn was making mistakes and began to fall behind due to her tear-filled vision. "Luna, you might want to check your place," Celestia smoothly pointed out.
Luna suddenly looked at her position on the TV screen and realized the gravity of the situation. "You're not going to win this time! TAKE THIS!" With one button press, Luna sent a storm of red shells toward Celestia. The older alicorn panicked as she was again knocked back to last. "Hacker!" she called out. Trying her best to regain her spot was nearly impossible as Luna was too good. They finished the race with Luna in first and Celestia dead last.
"Yeah, I got you good!” Luna was rolling on the floor by her sister's side, when suddenly there was a tinkling sound, like water being poured on flowers. Celestia’s nose turned up and shouted "Luna! All over the floor? Bad! Bad!" She swatted her with a newspaper as Luna pissed herself.
Luna blushed profusely. "Sorry, I didn't mean to," she looked at the small puddle, which wasn't that large to be perfectly honest. "I'm not cleaning that up."
"Yes, you are." Celestia stated bluntly.
Luna stared at her sister for a while to see if she was serious. Then after five minutes of neither of them saying anything, Luna proclaimed "nope." and teleported away.
Celestia sighed as she levitated a mop over to herself. ‘Wait... I can use my magic again! That brew’s actually working,’ she thought. Mopping Luna's piss took a good twenty minutes. After finishing up she enveloped her empty bowl and spoon in her magical grip to take to the kitchen.
Luna was playing Lollipop Chainsaw in her bedchambers when she heard the familiar sound of her sister's hooves trotting down the hall. She peered her head through her door and saw Celestia levitating objects with her magic. "Told you it'd work," Luna said, sticking her tongue out. "I hope you found your breast milk tasty because that won't be the last time you drink it."
Celestia looked at Luna "What do you mean?" She asked, clearly confused.
"Tsk tsk, you don't really think you're better already, do you? You don't just take medicine and get up thinking you're all peachy keen. You need more rest sister,” Luna adamantly replied.
"I know that. Colds don’t go away just like that. But I have to admit the medicine is helping," said Celestia, a shining smile already returning to her features as she made her way toward the kitchen. Luna sneakily followed her sibling, being careful to not get noticed. Celestia was too busy washing the bowl in the sink and didn't notice her sister at all. The moment the older sibling turned around she shrieked upon seeing Luna standing all too close behind her. "Luna!? What the heck!"
Celestia’s outburst made Luna jumped at the same time her sister did. "My goodness Tia, why are you so jumpy?"
"You scared me, that's why!" she blurted and turned on her heel to walk back to her room for some more much needed bedrest. Luna walked behind her sister going up the stairs. Her mind was on a horde of zombies she was facing before she decided to tag along with Celestia to the kitchen, but then something caught her eye. White drops of liquid were appearing on the steps in front of her. Somewhat sticky, she noted. She followed the source to see that it was coming from none other than Celestia's nips. "Uh, sis? I think you're leaking."
"What?" Celestia looked at herself and then turned around and saw white droplets. “Oh, buck me." She bolted to her room, her teats creating a snail trail along the way. She reached her room and slammed the door shut behind her. Luna laughed wholeheartedly at the scene that unfolded before her eyes. She followed the trail of tears to Celestia's bedchambers, but the door was locked tight. Even the guards posted at Celestia’s door were somehow covered in the stuff and that only made her laugh even harder.
"Oh well, time to slash some more undead,” Luna said after finally calming down from her laughing fit. Celestia then stayed locked up in her room for the rest of the day after that embarrassing incident.
A couple hours later, Luna knocked on Celestia's door demanding to be let in. "Tia, I know you're in there," yelled Luna.
Celestia didn't say anything and stayed put in her bed, her face buried in her pillow. Putting aside her manners, Luna teleported inside her sister’s room to confront her. "Tia, I'm worried about you. You haven't had anything substantial to eat other than the soup I made."
"Go away!" Celestia bellowed from beneath her pillow, not wanting anyone to bug her. All the white alicorn wanted now was to get back to 100% and move on with her life, hoping beyond hope her younger sister would never speak of what transpired again.
Luna could tell her older half was still embarrassed rubbed her sibling's shoulder. "Aw come on sister. It's not that bad. I bet nopony even noticed all the milk that leaked everywhere," Luna said as she got under the covers and turned on the TV. "Your favorite show is on, Total Shitty Island."
"Please, who doesn't notice a princess with milk flying out of her crotch?" Celestia giggled a bit at her own words. Her younger sister’s comforting words were starting to make her feel better. "And shut that off. That show is garbage."
Luna frowned a bit as she started channel surfing. "Well technically, the milk came out your nipples, not your actual crotch." She found a movie on TV called Ponies University.
"Whatever. It was still humiliating,” Celestia replied.
Luna patted her sister's head. "There, there. Your Aunty Luna is here now." A large bucket full of delicious popcorn appeared for them to eat. "Want some popcorn?"
"Sure," Celestia answered, hovering a few pieces of popcorn with her magic and stuffing them in her mouth. "Yummy," she said with a mouth full of popcorn, smiling over at Luna. The blue alicorn returned in kind with a creepy, sinister smile. "That's the spirit sis!" Luna said between mouthfuls of popcorn, before noticing a huge tarantula sitting atop Celestia's head. "Oh, horse feathers," she whispered.
Celestia stared at Luna. "What’s wrong?" she said, oblivious to the furry devil on her head.
"Hold still, there's a ginormous spider on your head." Luna used her magic to roll up a newspaper that was sitting nearby and wacked the top of Celestia's head really hard. "Ow! What was that for?" Her eyes darted to the floor and saw the dead spider lying there dazed. She screamed and threw it away.
"All better sis,” Luna said as she eyed the clock on the wall and realized that it was time to take Celestia's temperature again. The blue alicorn grabbed a thermometer out of her endless supply of medical supplies and told her sibling "Open wide." Celestia stared at Luna.
"You sure that's for my mouth?" she was worried that a repeat of this morning would occur. Rolling her eyes, Luna explained "Actually this one is for your ear."
"Then why did you tell me to open wide?" Celestia flicked her ear up and turned it towards Luna. "I meant for you to open your ear wide," Luna said matter of factly. The younger sister’s magic hovered the thermometer over Celestia's ear before forcefully jamming it in as far as she could.
Celestia instantly clocked Luna in the jaw, sending her to the ground. Blood ruptured from Celestia’s ear while she screamed in enormous pain. "You whore cunt psycho bitch!" She growled, blood flowing freely from her ear.
Luna simply laughed. She got up close to Celestia again and whispered, "Well since that ear is bleeding for whatever reason, I'll just have to use the other ear." Another thermometer hovered over Celestia’s other ear.
"NO!" She ran away from Luna out of the room, trying her hardest to lose her suddenly insane sibling. Luna grew a couple inches in size and lightning struck outside. "COME HERE SISTER! I NEED TO TAKE YOUR TEMPERATURE!" She bellowed in a gurgling, monstrous voice.
"Bite me!" She yelled as she turned a corner and hid in a small broom closet.
"OH SISTER. COME OUT AND PLAAAAY!" Luna thundered back and forth down the hall, searching for any sign of her sister's presence. "THAT WIDE FLANK OF YOURS CAN'T HIDE FROM ME FOREVER!"
Celestia trembled in her hiding spot but couldn’t help but feel a little indignant at that last comment. Luna, the junk food inhaler. Luna, the soda guzzler. She of all ponies had no business commenting on how big someone else’s flank was.
Luna caught a shimmer of Celestia's tail hanging out of the broom closet. "AHA! THERE YOU ARE!" Her foreleg grew to the size of King Kong's arm and fingers popped outward from it, all of them reaching for Celestia.
The white alicorn screamed "Get away!" She jumped out of Luna’s grip at the last second, but with nowhere else to hide, she cowered against the wall. Luna grabbed her sister with ease and squeezed until a fart escaped her. "THIS BODY WILL DO JUST NICELY. YOU SEE WHAT YOU DID TO MY FACE? YOU FUCKED ME UP MAN!” Luna used her other non-fingered hoof to point at her face where a knot was forming from the force of Celestia’s punch.
"What?" Celestia was now deaf in one ear due to her sister’s unexpected behavior. Picking up a sarcastic tone she said “Yeah, you messed up my hearing when you penetrated me in the ear!"
"I'LL PENETRATE YOU IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE IF YOU DON'T APOLOGIZE TO ME."
"I’ve done nothing that warrants apologizing to you! You apologize!"
"IF YOU DON'T APOLOGIZE THIS COCK IS GOING SO FAR UP YOUR VAG!" Luna used her horn to make a magical penis appear over her nethers.
"What?!" Celestia yelled.
"THAT'S IT," cried Luna, aiming her monstrous erection straight at Celestia's entrance and giving a forceful shove.
Celestia yawned. "Is it in? I don’t feel anything." She smirked at Luna, but inside it hurt like hell. Luna began pumping her grossly oversized length inside her sister, thrust after thrust, until Celestia's genitals started to tear. The older sister grabbed a life size statue of David Bowie in response and smacked it right across Luna's face. Unfortunately, it wasn't very effective. Luna continued slamming into her sister, unfettered by the impact of the statue. She could feel that intense feeling deep down in her privates, one that signaled she was nearing orgasm. "SISTER, I'M GOING TO COME INSIDE IF YOU DON'T SAY YOU'RE SORRY," Luna bellowed.
At this point, Celestia's vagina was starting to make ripping sounds and her crotch was becoming red with pain. Then, suddenly, her marehood ripped straight through to her stomach, up to her chest and neck, and over the middle of her face. Luna watched as her older sister fell into two halves, melting into a red gushy mess until Luna's cock emerged, still hard and tall.
The Royal Guards held a state funeral for their sun goddess later that day, burying her separated body in a grave. Everyone around Luna mourned her untimely demise, but she could feel some of their suspicious stares being casted her way. The cause of death was never discovered, so the Princess of the Night got away scott free. The court of public opinion might have a few choice words about the situation, but none of that mattered in Luna's mind. After the funeral was over and everyone in attendance gone, Luna took a trip to the castle basement, opened a metal door that only she could access, and stepped inside, revealing a containment facility full of Celestia clones.
She sauntered up to a random tube, thinking aloud to herself "Let's hope this one serves our mission better than the last." She glanced to a nearby desk where a bat pony scientist looked back at her with emotionless eyes. The blue alicorn gave him a curt nod.
The bat pony scientist knowingly pressed a button on his desk to release the clone in front of Luna. A perfect replica in every way, it emerged from its tube, slick with green slime, and trotted toward its sister.
"You want to grab some ice cream, Luna?" it inquired.
Luna smiled halfheartedly. "That would be lovely dear sister."
