~ I ~

Swollen Apologies

Dark clouds loomed over the empty land, tightening. Inside the closing black swirl, a blue blur fired like a gunshot. Wings unfurled, and the blaze slowed, gaining details. Winds pushed into the flared wingspans. Basil grass beneath the edges of her dangling hooves.

The wings flapped twice before impact, gliding the momentum of the pegasus into a loop, its exit sliding their hooves across the dirt. Thunder's echo hid the sound of paved dirt. Rainbow Dash slowed and stopped after a foot, head looking to the sky.

No openings.

Perfect coverage.

Storm's on schedule.

Rainbow tapped a hoof to her chest, unclipping brass from her uniform. She turned the silver name tag to her face, eyeing it behind chromatic bangs.

Rainbow “Danger” Dash

Rainbow's eyes rolled. Slipping the tag into a pocket, she looked forward to the lone, wooden building. Only a few feet off. Not bad. Work to the bar in ten-seconds flat. She pulled the outfit's hood over her head, raising a hoof to the door—stopping at the postings next to it.

Her hooves backed into the wettening dirt. The glass bulletins next to the doors housed posters of her. Some stock, Wonderbolt photo of Rainbow Dash. Foreleg over her chest, a mug clumsily added to her hoof. Her cutie mark blazed in the poster's corners.

"The Legend Drinks Here! Try the Mare's Mare Favourite—"

Rainbow backed away from the building. Black clouds lowered over it. Her muzzle flicked all over the sky for a break to make an escape. Not an iota of space. Perfect work as always, Rainbow.

Thunder roared, and mist buzzed in the air.

The mare turned to the silhouette of the town.

The woods boxed the open space of the graveyard. Outside of town, but not far from home. Tombstone neatly aligned with adequate space. None stood out from the rest—besides the flowers left.

Rainbow walked between the trees, not leaving them, seeing the graves from far. Third row from the top, fifth from the left. Branches saved the space from the elements. Rainbow laid a hoof on a tree. The skin beneath her fur froze at the touch.

Wish I had brought a warmer jacket.

Her eyes lowered to the grass at the grave.

I wonder if the dead ever feel cold.

Flowers froze her eyes. Dug into the grass, marking the sides of the tombstone. Two heavy flowers with frozen blue petals. Their density reminded Rainbow of a morning, winter's sky.

They'd been Rarity's favourite. She'd discovered them in a book and fell in love. Rainbow assumed them to be a fantasy.

Regardless of their travels, they never saw one, due to their apparent rarity.

Icesparalies. Near extinct flowers that defy the odds and grow near tundras. Unpurchasable due to benign unsustainable— even in their natural environment. That never bothered Rarity.

The flower captivated her.

Rainbow backed away from the tree, the graveyard, not having the heart to stay, the need arising to find walking life inside the town.

It drizzled after dark.

Rainbow slowed at the center of the town. Despite her urge to feel life around her, she retreated into her hood as strolling ponies passed. Umbrellas went up. Rainbow's wings twitched inside her clothing's enclosure. Just fly through the storm. There's nothing here. Wandering won't do anything for you.

Vibrations rushed beneath the ground.

Those nearby turned. They followed the vibration's source to the faint thuds afar. The doors to City Hall opened. Beneath their frame, an oversized silhouette ducked out, raising a greater height. It walked forward without halt or care.

Its footsteps cracked the air as they passed down the steps. Touching the ground, the beast carried forward and toward the fountain. Despite looking ahead, it didn't see the ponies clearing its path. Much less the lone stallion blocking the way in defiance.

The silhouette's knee broke into the stallion's him, knocking him aside without regard. The stallion fell, slumping into the mud. He rose, growling, to the beast that continued to the fountains. The stallion's mouth opened in a shout—but friends appeared at his side.

They wiped the mud from his chest, pulling back on his shoulders, dragging him away. They disappeared. As did those in the area. Some looked back over their shoulders with worried expressions.

At the fountain, the dragon took a seat, a rumble to the ground, a casting of wind. Its massive size sat with legs opened. It leaned forward, elbows resting on thighs, claws clutching a letter and ring of two keys.

It brought the letter to its face. It stared at it for a while. Rainbow made out its heart-seal. With its other claw, the dragon flexed the sharp end of the talon to the heart, planting it there. Its right eye twitched as its arm shook. The talon remained still.

Then its claw dropped.

The dragon dropped its head, sighing, raising to gaze lovingly at the seal. He brought it to his lips, holding the kiss with closed eyes. Then the letter was clutched to her heart. The drizzling of the sky turned into rain. The dragon curled over the envelope further to protect it.

It remained like that.

While Rainbow watched from the side of a lamppost.

The monster's head rose like a predator knowing it was watched. It looked from one side and to another—eyes shimmering emerald through the darkness and distance between them. Their glow: the only colour.

His eyes narrowed.

A darkened smile grew.

Her hooves sloshed into the mud. She walked toward him, leaving the safety of distance. Nothing of him moved, and nothing of his left hers. The monster hypnotically watched her near like a predator using its charm to lure prey.

Rainbow stood before blackened might. Unable to make details of his frame beside the slender bulk to it all. The darkest shade of purple had glossed his scales. His eyes, their drinking of her soul, were distinguishable.

Lines of water trailed down his face. He didn’t move. His smirk never waned. Rainbow swallowed. Words didn't come. Not before his silent, oozing confidence.

"Hey."

The monster opened. Without emphasis. His tone edged with smoke. Water had seeped into his mouth. He hadn't minded. His mouth didn't close, revealing its white daggers. He followed his greeting with an open smile.

"Pretty mares shouldn't lurk after dark." Slowly his head shook and rose with the words, like a warning from a fairy tale. He leaned forward with his mouth still open in a playful snarl. "Not when monsters stalk the streets."

Don't let him win.

The voice surprised her. Reminded Rainbow of herself.

Losing here means losing something unrecoverable.

"Double-check who you're talking to." Bravado licked mucus across her tongue as it shot out her mouth. "Name an ass I haven't whooped yet."

His mouth closed.

But its smirk was worse.

"Careful, Rainbow." The words were purred with masculine warmth. “Some beasts like that.”

Shock pushed her back. Trying for a joke to cover it resulted in an awkward laugh. The dragon did the same, holding that smirk, knowing the depths of her soul. It looked off to the sides to find nothing.

Was he checking for others? Ensuring his prey's isolation.

Get out of your own head.

"What are you doing here, Rainbow Dash?" His smooth, smoky tone faded at her name. Warmth left his voice, and bare baritone returned. It made her shudder as her blushing face looked away. She sensed him leaning closer. Felt the breath of his words flush across her cheek. "You want nothing with me. Yet, here you stand."

Rainbow blinked. Was that the trouble? Crusts of ice broke away from inside her racing heart. Years had passed since the mistake, the misunderstanding. Did he still clutch it personally to his chest? Or did he assume that she had all this time?

"I… I'm not mad at you, S-Spi…" Saying his name was too heavy of a weight for her tongue. Hearing it, though, brought a flash from his glowing eyes. He shifted, retracting. Instead of there being an imposing figure, more of a friend, now, sat before her. "I never had the right to be. That… that whole situation was a mess. It wasn't all your fault."

Rainbow pawed at the ground and looked around. "Everyone had their share of mistakes to pass around. Somehow, though, it was dumped on you." She looked down, protected by the hood. Escaping his intensity, entering seconds of freshness. "I was the oldest. It was my responsibility to handle it better —and I failed you. I was lost in myself, lost in what others were saying. I didn't sit down, think, then do the right thing."

Surprisingly, her hooves brought her closer to him, muzzle raising on its down, staring down her snout and up into his eyes. "I'm sorry for what I did. Nothing I said was true. It hurts to know that you carried that bullshit for so long. And I'm sorry. I'm just… I'm sorry, Spike."

His name, when attached to something earnest, was easier to say.

She laid a hoof on his knee, cold and wet, firm and smooth, a gift to her skin. He watched the contact before returning to her. Rainbow did her best to speak with a shy smile. "And I'm glad that you're back."

Spike remained silent, unreadable. His eyes betrayed his confusion transitioning into understanding. His smile returned. Gentler this time. "Thank you, Rainbow Dash." His muzzle dipped. "I forgive you."

Rainbow smiled without restraint, an unknown weight lifted from her soul. Rain pelted harder, dampening her hood. The dragon bathed without issue in the coldness. Suddenly, memories flooded through, and Rainbow Dash became herself again in front of her friend.

"But you're not off the hook with all that other crap!" She spoke to the giant like he was a kid, earning a twitch. Did she have the right, that closeness to speak that way to him? His narrowed gaze held, but so did hers, and after a few moments, his face relaxed.

Rainbow continued. "The hell was up with you just taking off? No note? Nothing?" She tapped his knee with a hoof. "Do you have any clue how worried the girls were? Everyone in town asking why they don't see you anymore? Worried you'd migrated or somethin'?"

Her head shook as rage carried her. "Getting bigger, older, quieter. Knowing less about what was going on before you were gone. We all felt like we did something, ya know! Like we didn't want you around."

Rainbow's ears flattened as her head lowered. "We... didn't make you feel unwanted, did we? I know… a lot was going on. And a lot of things were unsure. We all said or shouted something we didn't mean, but—"

Something sharp slipped beneath her chin to raise her muzzle. Lightning flashed in the sky behind, warming the details of the dragon's face, a flash to the image of a friend. His warm expression ceased her panic. But now, it was time for his eyes to search inside himself. He found the truth, struggling with it. For the first time since their encounter, he was the one to look away.

His claw pulled out from her hood.

"You girls were amazing." His eyes cast light on the sides of his muzzle. His face twitched as though reliving the past. His words came hesitantly, half-truthful. "I was the one becoming a trouble maker. The center of popping stories and problems." His voice exhaled, and his head shook. "I never impacted the world around me much as a kid. Never played a role in how things were."

Water rushed down his shoulders to his chest, threatening the letter. He raised it higher beneath his throat, holding his head over it. Water poured from the edge of his snout. His feet twisted in brown goo. "I didn't like the responsibility. Things changing because of me. If I left… I wouldn't be a factor anymore. Things would go on without my interference—without me to corrupt it."

He looked over with a defeated smile. "The silly thoughts of a beginning adult." He nodded at her. "I wish I handled it better as well." He curled further over the envelope. "But the body's already buried. Not much sense in digging it out."

Puddles rose inside the craters across the mud. Murky water swirled, pelted. It wasn't the whole truth. There was more. Being on edge with the dragon had exhausted her heart. It beat and begged for relief from the tension.

"Guess that's the way it works, sometimes." Rainbow sat next to him on the fountain. The cloaked mare and the soaking dragon, outside after dark. Bangs of rainbow escaped her hood, the blue edge of her muzzle peeking out. "But we can still hold conversations over the grave. Or... whatever fancy saying Twilight would throw at it."

Spike's laugh pierced through the pelting of rainfall.

"Looking at you now," Rainbow looked over at his form. "You must have had your share of love affairs." Her rump scooted close, her elbow jabbing him. His head still hung forward, but his eyes checked her. "Did my help get you laid a few times? How high did my advice rank you in being a player?"

Assurance pulled at his lips. "Some answers are better not spoken."

Rainbow's eyebrows rose on her shaking head. "You're that good? Damn."

At least he's getting laid.

Something cold pricked her heart at the dragon in bed with a string of others—sometimes, all simultaneously. Red stretched over her face. She gasped for breath, thinking and looking at the protected letter.

"And how about that?" Rainbow opened and pointed at it. "Since when is City Hall playing postal office?"

Spike sat up and opened his side, moving to bring his arm around her. Rainbow twitched, halting the advance, but slid into his side to cover for panic. Her outfit protected her from wet scales. His raw heat, the broad furnace, warmed through the fabric. He must have held a burning fire within, not feeling the cold.

Greater darkness passed. His wings curled over them, creating a leathery dome. It boxed in heat and blocked the rain. Its coverage was extensive enough for Rainbow to use his legs like a bed. The dragon looked down his loft, smiling at her, but looking at the letter in his claw, which lowered to his lap.

He turned the envelope to reveal the heart-shaped seal. A faded lipstick kiss imprinted the paper. It contrasted the whiteness. Cursive lettering spelled "For Spikey-Wikey." He smiled sadly.

"Rarity's will left me two keys and a letter." His eyes squeezed close, smile faltering. "They struggled to hand them off. Believe it or not, Spikey-Wikey isn't my legal name. It would have gone to a judge if it weren't for Twilight. But even then, I would have…"

Rainbow looked behind her. His claw clutched the edge of the fountain. His tightening grip cracked the marble, dust spraying between his talons. He released his sudden hold, a chunk of white falling from his palm.

The dragon choked, exhaling.

"Now… I'm left to wonder if City Hall is right." His eyes opened again to a softer glow. "Her Spikey-Wikey doesn't exist anymore. Something else consumed him."

Rainbow shook her head. "Who are you trying to kid? It never mattered what you did—you were always Spikey-Wikey to her."

Spike chuckled. "You're right." He looked back at the letter. "The truth is that I don't have the heart to break the seal. But still… I feel different from the dragon I was meant to be."

"Sometimes, that's how it goes, Spike." Rainbow's forelegs nestled on his lap. She glanced up. "You have an idea of the kind of adult you'll grow into. Then you actually go through life, and you become something different. Thinking back, it only makes sense how you became what you are."

Those weren't the words of Rainbow Dash. That wasn't something she'd ever say—much less to a friend in a time such as this. Disgust flooded like a black infection. The pressure of vomit pressed on the inside of her chest. She fought back all visible signs of her recoil. Needing more, than to save him, to save herself.

"How about the keys?" Hopefully, breaking the silence stopped Spike from thinking about her words. "What are those for?"

His mouth opened, but he paused, then carefully spoke. "The boutique. Rarity left it to me. Earned by all my time and help there. Sweetie's still going strong with college in Manehatten. Not interested in the place in the slightest."

Spike exhaled heavily. "She could have left it to another designer. They would have found a better use for the place. But she left it to me… she left it to me."

Rainbow's hood slid back onto her neck, her mane flouncing. She didn't pull it back to cover her face. Not when nobody could see. Not when she was inside the dragon's protection. "Are you going to give it up?"

"Once someone more deserving appears." Spike noticed Rainbow's exposure. His wings curled tighter around her, further blocking possible outsider view. "Rarity wanted me to have a home of my own."

Rainbow arched an eyebrow. "Staying with Twilight isn't an option?"

"Growing into a proper dragon has its quirks," Spike replied as he looked over her, searching the area for wanderers. He was watchful, protective. "She knew about them. Didn't want me uncomfortable in shared dwellings."

Rainbow's face scrunched. "Why would you be uncomfortable?"

He glanced at her as though she'd asked a stupid question. Knowing that the coast was clear, he lowered his head to her muzzle. "You want a drink? Somewhere where you won't be asked for your autograph?"

"You mean the boutique?" Rainbow laughed, tapping his chest. "What? Scared to go alone? What does a hunk like you have to be afraid of?"

"What if the place is haunted?"

Rainbow's head arched back. "Why would Rarity haunt you?"

"Because I wasn't there for her last breath." Smoke rose around his whisper. "Now she's left me her home. Name a better trap."

"You think you're better off with me tagging along? I wasn't there for her either!"

Not being there for her dying friend had been an ache of terrible guilt. Now, their jokes joined them. Their terribleness transitioned into wonderful laughter.

"Then..." Spike breathed, filling her vision with his existence, the sharpness of his muzzle inches from hers. His claw tapped her cheek, talons like delicate knives, brushing to her neck, tickling her skin, scratches that renewed the decaying nerves beneath. "We owe the deceased two souls for the price of one, don't we? Come, now."

The talons swirled on her neck, brushing the fur, scratching the skin, pulling away, leaving the patch in lingering warmth. His claw gripped her hood, pulling it over her head, obscuring her face. Bunched, prismatic mane, shrouded her view of him. Some of his muzzle, a couple of his teeth, loomed between and beyond her hair.

“Consider yourself kidnapped.”

Author's Note

End of Chapter!

Editing and outlining take it out of you! I'm learning that, when you're writing, you need to let yourself go. Have no self-consciousness. Write what feels right. Not all of it will be good—which can be sharpened or changed later. But if you do not write hot: your words are at risk of sounding forced and clinical.

Lose yourself to the story first.

Worry about the rest in the second draft.

Hopefully, that's a lesson I learn and apply soon!

See you next chapter.
~ Yr. Pal, B