The Flight Lottery (My Heart Tells Me Wings Are For Flying)

by Mockingbirb

Rating: teen
Tags: Suicide / Self Harm, My Little Pony: A New Generation, Tragedy, Zipp Storm, Queen Haven, Slice of Life, Dark, Death, Other
Length: 1300

As the pegasus leaps to his death, he thinks it's a special honor.

As the pegasus leaps to his death, he thinks it's a special honor.

(Main inspirations: see the essential "Author's Note" at the end.)

Published 2022-06-10 18:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2022-06-10 18:30:01 UTC

Chosen

"But he's going to die!" Zipp complained. "Doesn't that even bother you?"

Queen Haven sighed. "Dear...we need to have a little talk. A very PRIVATE talk." She wrapped a wing around Zipp, and pulled her into an unponied corner of the broad observation deck.

"Zipp...you ARE in the line of succession. So it's your duty to prepare yourself, should you ever need to step up and rule Zephyr Heights."

Zipp nodded. "That's why I need to practice now, by trying to protect our subjects' lives!"

Haven shook her head. "Anypony can say, I care about ponies and I want them to live. But not just anypony can look at the bigger picture, and understand it's not always possible to save everypony. When that happens, you need to make difficult choices."

On the far end of the observation deck, a smiling pegasus stallion posed for a crowd of photographers and videographers. He stood on his hind legs for a moment, flexing his forelegs to make his muscles pop.

Zipp watched the stallion and gritted her teeth. "How can you let this happen?"

"He put his name in the jar, just like so many other ponies. He thinks it's an honor to be chosen."

On a massive video screen beyond the observation deck, archival footage played of a pegasus wearing a blindfold. The pony reached one foreleg into an enormous jar, stirring up the contents, and pulled out a single slip of paper. She held up the paper, displaying a pony's name. The video camera reverse zoomed, to show an entire audience of pegasi cheering and stomping and clopping their hooves together. They seemed so happy!

"He's a fool. It's not an honor. It's a...national disgrace."

Haven snorted. "If it's a national disgrace, it's a very popular one. If someday a queen tried to abolish the custom, she might find herself fighting a surge of public unrest. Young and inexperienced as you are, you might take the throne's safety for granted...but you shouldn't. An important part of true leadership is knowing what NOT to order your subjects to do, and when not to order them to do it. Abolishing the Lottery would be one of those things."

"I hate you."

"I can't blame you for being angry. But when you're older and wiser...someday you'll understand."

The confident pegasus stallion looked up at the clouds. He held up one forehoof as if gauging the wind.

"He doesn't have the first idea what he's doing," Zipp seethed. "If he wants to check the wind, why doesn't he look at the banners? Or better yet, why isn't he trying to turn around and run away?"

Haven smiled ironically. "He isn't used to being in the public eye like this. Even if he feels a sudden flood of fear, I don't think he can handle the embarrassment of looking like a coward."

"It isn't cowardice to admit you don't want to die!"

"But my dear, it isn't his job to die. Dying is just a side effect."

"I really hate you."

"As much as I'd love to chat with my daughter some more, duty calls. I should go congratulate the lucky winner." Haven hugged her daughter for a moment. Afterwards, the Queen walked to the far end of the observation deck.

The specially chosen pegasus stallion followed the other ponies' gazes, and turned to see the Queen herself come to see him off.

"Your highness," he said. "I am honored."

The Queen smiled warmly. "You are too kind."

"No, I really am honored. To be greeted and seen off by a pony of the Royal Bloodline."

The Queen's expression turned serious. "My heart bleeds, my dear. I wish you the absolute best of luck. I truly hope you will be the pony who shows the deadly curse is finally broken."

A photographer threw down his camera, and made a break for the high railing around the platform's edge. When he was halfway up the metal barrier, three guards converged on him, pulling him back down. They dragged him to the deck's center, where they force-marched him down into a fully enclosed stairway, a space with no gaps through which a pony might leap.

More guards eyed the crowd, trying to spot anypony else who seemed likely to steal a chance to take a sudden, unscheduled jump.

Everypony's attention turned back to the Lottery winner. If he had any doubts, they didn't show through. He strode to a ladder, climbed up with seeming confidence, and posed on the higher one-pony platform which surmounted the railing. He turned back for a moment, but only to smile and wave. "I take a small flap for one pony," he said, "but a great flight for all pegasuskind! See you after my flight."

On the enormous video screen behind the deck, the view changed to a shot of the deck as seen from far away, but centered on the specially chosen stallion. He waved in the general direction of the camera. The stallion stepped back a little, and ran forward as fast as he could.

For a breathtaking moment, he seemed to hang in the air, his wings beating strongly. He was a beautiful, inspiring sight, a creature born to live in the air.

But slowly, he started to descend. A few ponies screamed or wailed as he gained speed. The wind of his descent ripped feathers out of his wings. The distant camera panned to follow his fall.

A minute later, the camera zoomed to show his broken body on the hard ground below. He seemed to move slightly, but after that he was still.

Another pegasus had tried to break the curse, and had failed.

***

When Queen Haven rejoined her daughter, Zipp was looking directly away from the giant video screen. A spattering of frothy liquid, with very little solid matter, lay on the deck's surface directly in front of Zipp.

"I see you took my advice," Haven said. "An early breakfast on Lottery Day is only so much wasted oats."

"I hate you so much," Zipp growled. "How can you? How can you let ponies do that?"

Haven sighed. "Pegasus instinct says to fly. It's my duty to prevent all the pegasi from jumping off a cliff, or leaping from tall buildings to their deaths. Either I let each pony learn for their own self the hard way, one by one, until there are no pegasi left...or I provide the most public demonstration possible. So I make the hard choice, instead of letting a myriad more pegasi quietly destroy themselves every day."

Zipp growled wordlessly.

"The pegasus suicide rate is down to less than one in a hundred per year. It's just possible our race might survive. And if I save our species from certain doom...I'm not sorry. I don't enjoy watching brave ponies like Breeze leap to their deaths, but the alternative is even worse."

Zipp put a forehoof over her face, and bawled. "Why did he have to be so stupid? Why do ponies..." She gasped, sobbing. "Why?" she screamed. "Why do we even have these wings, if all they do is make us want to kill ourselves?"

Queen Haven enfolded her daughter in her wings. "I love you, dear. I care about every pegasus in Zephyr Heights and beyond...but I love you and your sister most of all." Haven's wings gently squeezed the mourning pegasus. "I love you so much."

Author's Note (an integral part of the reading experience)

This story's inspirations include:

Mica's "And their spatter became the Alluring Light" (link) is VERY MUCH an inspiration for this story.

Shirley Jackson's "The Lottery"

When I post a story about suicide, I usually include a link to Monochromatic's "The Choices We Make." (link)