Laments of the Dimension-Stranded

Vincent clicked his tongue in disapproval as he observed a third complication. Excessive wear had deteriorated the Inexorable's tires, and needle-thin rock fragments had punched holes through the rubber. The tire was partially deflated. He had immediately repaired it using a can of emergency tire sealant, but it wasn't a permanent solution.

The truck was critically low on oil, a problem he couldn't remedy because he lacked spare oil. Critical components of the engine could potentially seize without proper lubrication.

To make matters worse, the vehicle was critically low on coolant, and, once again, Vincent lacked spare antifreeze. Without ample quantities of coolant, the engine was at risk of overheating.

To make matters even worse, a lack of sufficient oil and coolant would lead to a cascade of independent component failures which would, in turn, contribute to an eventual total engine failure. It was inevitable.

Vincent sighed sadly. He deactivated the flashlight he clutched and slammed the truck's hood. He understood the Inexorable wasn't a living creature, but, regardless, he felt a touch of grief knowing his magnum opus would soon cease functioning. He had dedicated years to repair the vehicle, and now, after mere weeks of use, it was beginning to expire.

The Inexorable had been destined to fail before its very creation, of course. He knew that. Vincent wasn't delusional. Vehicles required too many specific components to function; long-term continuance was impossible without a generous stockpile of spare parts. Though, he hadn't predicted total failure to occur so soon.

"Vince...? Why did the car shake?" Rainbow Dash raised her head and rubbed her sleepy eyes with her hooves, gazing through the windshield.

Vincent brushed his hand against the Inexorable's magnificent lemon body as he circled the vehicle and deposited his tools into the rear seat. He mounted the shelf beneath the driver's side door, climbing into the cab.

"Was checking the engine. Gave it more gas, but the engine ain't looking good, Dash. It's stop workin' soon. Don't have enough liquid to keep it cool and lubricated, and all those parts rubbing against each other without lube are gonna cause some major friction that'll—"

"'Parts rubbing each other without lube'," Rainbow repeated, giggling. "That's what she said!"

Vincent smiled. "Not even five minutes awake and you're already mocking me. I'm so proud of you. I've turned you into such a disrespectful potty-mouth."

"You're proud of me? Thanks, mom and dad." Rainbow chuckled, rising in her seat and splaying her limbs to stretch.

When their amusing exchange concluded, Vincent reached for the iPod to play a song, but paused with his hand hovering in midair. He sighed, withdrawing his hand. "Hey Dash, I'm, uh... I'm sorry about last night. I—"

Rainbow smiled encouragingly and gently interrupted him. "Forget about it, okay? Everyone feels emotions. It's not a big deal. I promise not to talk about it if you don't. Just focus on driving."

"We're leaving today? I figured we were staying in this cave until you started feeling better."

"Hey Vince, there's somethin' you gotta know about me—" Rainbow swept her multicolored mane away from her eyes and smirked. "I never surrender if I have the strength to keep going! You know why I excelled in the academy with flying colors? Because I wiped out hard, rolled a couple times and got back on my hooves and kept flying. I won that race. Anypony else in my place would have given up. I'm ready to give it 110 percent."

Vincent hesitated, not expecting to hear a motivational speech. Even more unexpectedly—it was working. She was correct, now wasn't time to act despondent. He had to keep advancing forward against opposition. He'd keep pushing until his body finally broke.

"You really think that? Alright, Dash." He snickered. "Let's prove it. Wanna hear why they call me Mister Fahrenheit?"

Rainbow blinked. "Huh?"

Vincent rotated the key in the Inexorable's ignition, triggering the engine to start with a voracious roar. "Let's do this thing! One more time." He activated the iPod and inputted 'Queen', selecting 'Don't Stop Me Now' from the list of relevant tracks that appeared.

Soft piano murmured in the background of the song's intro. Vincent planted his hands on the steering wheel at positions 2 o' clock and 10 o' clock, depressing the accelerator gently as he carefully navigated the Inexorable out of the cave mouth. He aligned the hood of the truck with the hill they had to scale to escape the bottom of the ravine they were currently positioned in.

When the drums began to kick in and the words of the first verse were uttered, Vincent nodded his head to the beat and sang along. He gripped the steering wheel securely. "'Don't stop me, 'cause..." He slammed the accelerator and the Inexorable roared forward responsively, continuing to accelerate as it gradually gained elevation while ascending the hill.

"...I'm havin' a good time!'"

The Inexorable launched off of the hill as if it were a ramp, sailing through the air. Rainbow howled.

Together, they attempted to sing along with the main vocalist. They were both unfavorably disadvantaged; Rainbow had never heard the song before and Vincent had forgotten most of the lyrics on account of the fact he hadn't listened to the track for years. Regardless, they gave it 110 percent.

"'I'm a satellite outta control!'"

"'I'm a sex machine!'" Rainbow sang along, giggling at the bawdy lyrics.

The Inexorable soared across the rocky landscape as if bestowed magnificent wings. The speedometer hand continued to advance higher and higher. Energetic drums and guitar blared from the truck's superior sound system.

"'Don't stop me, don't stop me!'" Vincent chanted.

"'Heyyy!'"

CRASH! The Inexorable struck the ground hard and began to skid, spinning donuts on the slippery gravel. Vincent jerked the wheel in the opposite direction of the spin to compensate. The truck's rear end whipped back and forth chaotically like the tail of a landed fish.

"Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!" Rainbow cheered, stomping her hooves against her seat.

When the song began to subside and fade, Vincent grinned, reflecting on the crazy stunt he had just performed. "That song'd make anyone feel like a renegade. Makes me feel like a teen again."

He glanced to his right. Rainbow looked supremely gratified. She truly was a daredevil at heart—a free spirit, a maverick. It was inspiring. Nothing could hold them down. "Oh my gosh, if I laugh more I think I'm gonna hurt myself!"

Vincent reached with his right hand and clutched the iPod, raising it to eye level so he could scroll through its contents and watch where he was driving simultaneously. Utilizing only his peripheral vision, he effortlessly swerved around a boulder obstructing their path.

"My dad used to tell me 'if you're drivin' around places past 11pm, you ain't up to no good.' Well, ya know what? He was right! I was always up to the craziest shit. I started drivin' when I was just 16! They should've never given me a license." He selected 'As Long As You Love Me' by Backstreet Boys and set the iPod down. "Used to have like three dudes in the car with me. Wasn't legal, but I never got pulled over. Just drove for hours listening to the radio. BSB were on 24/7 when I was a kid."

Vincent sang along to the lyrics flawlessly with few mistakes. It felt right. For once, he felt at home. He wasn't reunited with his old childhood friends, but the companionship he shared with Rainbow was special.

"Hey Dash?"

"Yeah?"

Vincent timed his words perfectly and synchronized with the vocalists. "'Don't care who you are or where you're from, as long as you love me.'"

Rainbow pretended to act flustered and flirty, waving a hoof in front of her muzzle in an fake attempt to cool and suppress a nonexistent blush. "I never thought you'd admit your true feelings for me!"

"That looked so gay." Vincent chuckled.

She giggled. "I haven't heard somepony say they loved me since I went to Scootaloo's fan club dedicated to me."

"You have fans?" Vincent steered with one hand and snapped his fingers to the tempo of the song with his other spare hand.

"Totally! Mostly colts and fillies in Ponyville and Cloudsdale, but since I became an official Wonderbolt, more ponies started recognizing me in public! I wouldn't call myself a celebrity exactly, buttttt..." Rainbow struck a dramatic posture, posing for the nonexistent lens and flash of an invisible camera.

"Attention-whore."

"Hey! I earned it fairly!"

Vincent selected a new track and set the iPod down, resting both of his hands on the steering wheel. It was 'Dancing Queen' by Abba, an ancient pop classic that featured energetic piano and rattles maintaining the rhythm. It was relaxing and reminded him of the bygone rollerblading era.

Beyond the relative safety of the Inexorable's interior, the landscape was hostile. Conditions were harsh. The rocky terrain was littered with boulders, spikes and, most significantly, wide chasms that dotted the land like lacerations across skin.

"I miss the grass and trees. And animals." Rainbow pursed her lips.

"Are we getting close?"

Rainbow held her breath and remained as still as possible, focusing. "I can't tell. The humming has been in the back of my mind for so long I kinda got used to it and forgot it was there. We're probably going in the right direction."

"We'll know when there's another Migration, I guess. So, are you just gonna go stiff as a board and aim like a pointer dog from a cartoon when we get close, or? Would probably help if we knew what we were lookin' for..."

Vincent fell silent, focusing on driving and navigating the Inexorable around obstacles. "Hey, Dash."

"Yeah?"

"I know I already said I'm bad at expressing how I feel, so I won't repeat myself. But... you've been a really good friend to me. Thanks."

"I didn't do it because I thought I had to, I stuck by you because it's just you and me. It's you and me against the world, right? That's what you said."

"Yeah, I did." Vincent smiled. "With a friend like you, I think anything could be possible. I really wish you could come back with me, but... I know that's not gonna happen. Still, I—" Realizing he had steered the Inexorable directly toward a massive ravine, he slammed the brake pedal and tugged the steering wheel to the left in an attempt to decelerate quicker. The Inexorable's tires skidded across the slippery gravel before eventually finding purchase and drawing to a halt.

"Whoa! Try not to drive straight off the edge, dude." Rainbow opened the passenger's side door and hopped down to the ground, trotting toward the precipice.

Vincent descended the shelf mounted beneath the driver's side door. He retrieved his Kalashnikov rifle and a backpack with numerous dangling straps from the back seat of the vehicle before jogging forward to meet his companion.

The chasm was massive, dozens of feet across. Rainbow could easily fly over the deep gash in the land, but neither Vincent nor his glorious lemon truck could manage such a feat.

"Not gonna be able to get across this giant canyon with the truck. Damn..." Vincent kicked a pebble and observed it descend into the dark depths where even the sunlight failed to illuminate. "It was a good run while it lasted, alter Freund. Danke für ihre Dienstleistung."

"Can't even see the bottom." Rainbow peered over the edge, her wings unfurled and rigidly straight to precisely maintain her balance.

"Please don't stand so close." Vincent groaned, nervous. He was aware his winged companion could fly and easily maneuver in midair, but, regardless, witnessing her stand mere inches from falling off of a cliff terrified him.

"Why? What's gonna happen, am I gonna fall?" Rainbow mocked Vincent's deterrent. She intentionally attempted to irritate him by positioning herself leaning over the edge of the chasm with her rear legs crossed and forelegs supporting the rear of her head. She effortlessly flapped her wings in such a manner that she resisted the pull of gravity and appeared to be levitating over the empty air. She closed her eyes as if tanning on a beach bench.

"Oh my God." Vincent narrowed his eyes. "You have to be doing this on purpose, now."

"C'mon Vince. You're not scared of heights, are ya?" Rainbow opened one eye and peeked in her companion's direction.

"I'm not scared of heights. I'm scared of you doing something stupid and falling and hitting your head on something. Or worse."

"Yeah sure, spoilsport, like I totally haven't done this before."

A big clap of thunder startled Rainbow, causing her to miscalculate the flaps of her wings. The equilibrium of her wing flaps disturbed, she twirled and somersaulted midair and fell for a few seconds before regaining control and hovering. "Whoa!"

Vincent raised his head and gazed up into the sky. Black magic stormclouds were rolling in, blotting out the brilliant sunlight emitted by Nowhere's dual suns. A big heavy pit of dread formed in Vincent's stomach, encumbering him.

"Rainbow! You need to get up here now! Now! Double time!"

Fat raindrops hammered the ground diagonally, canted by a gale. Thunderbolts rained from the sky and struck the ground, detonating like mortar shells. Two far away that ignited the sky in a blue flash. One struck the ground nearby, exploding a giant boulder and showering the surrounding area in a big plume of dust and a cascade of needle-thin rock shrapnel.

Vincent collapsed onto his knees and cowered, crossing his arms over his face in a defensive gesture. It was more instinctual than intentional. A few shards of rock struck his helmet at high velocities and ricocheted off of the hard kevlar with audible plinks.

Despite his warning, Rainbow didn't escape the chasm fast enough. She had enough time to land onto the chasm precipice and fold her wings against her back before...

A clap of thunder boomed, accompanied by a lightning bolt that descended through the air faster than a speeding bullet. Vincent leapt in fright from the explosion that occurred, clenching his eyes shut. He briefly witnessed a blinding flash of blue light, blinked, and then noticed the circle of blackened, seared rock surrounding Rainbow as she lied prone.

"Holy shit!"

"I'm fine—lightning can't hurt me!" Rainbow stood up, brushing dust and rock fragments out of her fur. She looked dazed, rubbing a hoof against the side of her head near her ear where shrapnel had bitten into her and drawn blood.

"You sure you're okay?" Vincent retrieved his rifle from where he had dropped it to assure it didn't blow away in the prodigious wind. When he raised his head and swept his gaze around the surrounding area, he spotted Rainbow and observed as she froze and stiffened. He blinked. "Dash...?"

Rainbow slowly rotated 180 degrees and teetered toward the cliff like a zombie, throwing herself off of the edge into the chasm.

"Dash!" Vincent leapt forward in an attempt to grasp one of her legs or wings to capture her, but he was too late. "Shit!" Without a moment of hesitation, he slipped the backpack on, fastened the buckles and tightened the straps around the unnatural curvature of his plate carrier. He hugged his rifle tightly, held his breath to quell the fear within him and sprinted forward, leaping off of the precipice.

The wind roared in his ears as he rapidly accelerated, descending faster and faster to the bottom of the massive chasm where spikes and needle-sharp shards of rock unquestionably waited to shred him to pieces the moment he inevitably landed. Most men were given months or years to gradually accept the truth they were going to die. In that moment of panic, he sincerely believed he had mere seconds.

Then he tugged the parachute release.

The high-visibility orange parachute exploded out from the pack and immediately began dilating, slowing his descent. No longer panicking, Vincent locked his eyes on Rainbow, keenly tracking her every move. She spread her wings in a clumsy, inexperienced way and failed to decelerate enough for the landing to be considered soft. She landed hard on her hooves, bending her knees to absorb the force of the impact. Before he knew it, she had darted into a nearby cave system.

"Dash, come back! What the fuck?" His rifle clattered against the rock floor as he dropped it before landing. Vincent hit the ground hard with a grunt, rolling and ensnaring himself in the high tensive strength paracord. Without hesitation, he sacrificed the parachute to pursue Rainbow faster. He drew his bayonet from its sheath and sawed through the paracord cables and harness, permanently destroying the delicate equipment.

Vincent retrieved his rifle and activated the rail-mounted flashlight to illuminate his path. He attempted to hold the rifle and attached flashlight steady as he dashed through the cave mouth to pursue Rainbow's fleeing form.