It was a nice day outside. Celestia’s sun was shining down, but not beating down, on Ponyville. The sky was 15 percent clouds, providing the perfect amount of shade, but not overcast. The birds provided a soothing and natural background music. There couldn’t have been a more perfect day in Equestria, and everpony was enjoying this glorious day outside.
That is, everpony except for a certain prismatic maned, cyan furred, normally athletic pegasus. No, this usually energetic mare was spending this day inside. Most would think that she’s probably sleeping in, as always. But she was awake, and very focused on a piece of paper.
This piece of paper wasn’t from a book, as the only books this pegasus read were about Daring Do. As well, this piece of paper was in the process of having words put on it.
That’s absolutely correct. Rainbow Dash was writing a fanfic... unfortunately.
Equestria’s best flyer was certainly not Equestria’s best writer. In fact, Rainbow Dash failed every English class she took. More in fact, she did worse than fail; somehow her grade was -F. Not F-, but negative F.
The final scratches of quill against parchment echoed in Rainbow Dash’s cloud house, and the sounds came to an abrupt halt.
“Done!” Rainbow exclaimed, reading over her... masterpiece. “This is gonna be so awesome! When everypony reads this, they’ll be all like ‘Wow, a story this cool could only have been written by the ever radical Rainbow Dash.’ I gotta show Twilight this, she’d love it!”
And with that, the seven-toned pony was on her way to Ponyville’s only library.
***
In Twilight Sparkle’s house tree, five happy-go-lucky mares exchanged pleasantries and waited for their sixth member to join them. Little did they know that their sixth member was bringing about a catastrophe that not even the Elements of Harmony could repair.
“Late again. Does that mare know anything about timing?” said Rarity, rather angrily. In her defense, the mane six’s weekly get togethers were always delayed due to Rainbow Dash’s tardiness.
“You can’t be so hard on her... I mean you can if you want to... but Rainbow can be pretty... uhm... busy sometimes.” Fluttershy said nervously, trying to calm Rarity down.
Twilight interjected, “Well whatever it is that’s making Rainbow late, we should probably start without her. I don’t think she’ll mind--” She was interrupted by a series of knocks on the front door. “Oh that must be her.”
Rainbow entered beaming. More than beaming. Her happiness and excitement to share her narrative was physically radiating from her. The light blue pegasus’ facial expression would’ve caused tissue decay. That’s how radiantly beaming she was.
“Wow, Dashie, you sure look happy. You’re so happy you’re making me happy. Why are you so happy? Did you get accepted into the Wonderbolts? I think this calls for a ‘Rainbow Dash is a Wonderbolt party’.” Pinkie Pie literally bounced around the room like a carelessly thrown ball, her own happiness mirroring Rainbow Dash’s. Though Pinkie’s radiance would probably be used in cancer treatments, but that’s besides the point.
“Woah, Pinkie slow down. I just came to--” Rainbow dash tried to say before she was interrupted.
“Unless, you’re not a Wonderbolt, then we can throw a ‘Party for the sake of parties and Rainbow Dash is really happy party’.”
“Pinkie, I just came to show everypony this awesome story I wrote and--” Rainbow dash said before she was interrupted again. This time by five shocked, but mostly disgusted gasps.
The ordinarily energetic pink party pony’s enthusiasm deflated instantly. Her cheerfulness was replaced by sadness and devastation. “Oh... Oh no. This doesn’t call for a party at all. Dashie, I’m sorry, but I should go.” Pinkie Pie did not hop, skip, or jump, but simply walked home.
“Jeez, what’s her problem?” Rainbow responded to the sudden melancholy.
“This is the WORST... POSSIBLE...” An awkward silence befell the room as everypony waited for the end to Rarity’s famous phrase.
“Rarity are you going to--” Rainbow said, breaking the silence before being interrupted for a third time.
“Please let me finish darling, I’m pausing for dramatic effect... something you would know about if you were any good at writing.” The last part she said under her breath.
“What was that Rarity?”
“THING! As much as it pains me to say, but I must leave. I have... dresses to make, that’s it. Unfortunately, I can’t stay to hear your, er... story Rainbow.” Rarity started to leave before Twilight stopped her.
“Rarity, you were just complaining how Rainbow Dash was late.”
Rarity sighed, “Twilight, dear, Rainbow’s writing is, how to put this delicately... atrocious. Even Applejack is a better writer than Rainbow Dash.”
“Hey!” cried the two athletic ponies in unison. But before they could tell Rarity off, she was gone.
“The nerve of that mare!”
“It’s true sugarcube, your writin’s worse than Braeburn in a colt club, an’ you know what happens to colts around Braeburn. ‘Sides, you can’t even form a simple metaphor.” Rainbow Dash glared daggers at Applejack. The cowpony felt the sting of hatred and started to regret her choice of words. “Maybe I should just leave.”
“Maybe you should.” Growled the now irritated pegasus. “Fluttershy, my writing isn’t that bad is it?”
“Eep.” Squeaked Fluttershy. Being one of Rainbow Dash’s oldest friends, the light yellow pony had read every single one of Rainbow’s attempted articles. It’s a wonder how she has survived this long.
“Just read this one, and tell me what you think. And be honest.” Rainbow pushed her fanfic at Fluttershy, who was now backed into a corner, hiding behind her mane.
“As much as I’d love to, I can’t, uhm... read your hoofwriting, but I’m sure it’s a very good story.”
“Well I could read it out loud, and--”
“OhnevermindIcanreaditperfectlyfineandeverythingaboutitisperfectokbye!” Fluttershy flew out of there as fast as she had just talked.
“What is everypony’s problem today?”
“Rainbow Dash, If you want, I’ll read your work.” Suggested Twilight. The purple mare, as studious as she is, had read every book in her library. Maybe some original writings from her polychromatic friend could be a good addition to her collection. Then again, Twilight had no idea what she was getting herself into.
“Really? You’d do that for me? Awesome. Just so you know, its a clopfic. I know, it’s a dangerous move for a first piece, but I’m Rainbow Dash. I’m a mare who takes risks.” Rainbow Dash said with pride. She was glad that somepony would finally read her short novel.
“Oh, ok. Well, is there a plot?”
“Oh yea.” Rainbow replied suggestively.
“No I mean like a storyline.”
“Oh yea it’s an adventure, like Daring Do.”
“Who are the characters?”
“It stars my OC, Spectrum Flash, and Spitfire, from the Wonderbolts.”
“Oh... how interesting.” Twilight was starting to get a little apprehensive about the task ahead. Maybe her friends were write about Rainbow’s writing. No, she couldn’t think that way. “Well it can’t be as bad as the others say it is. I’m sure they’re just overreacting.” And with one look at the abomination in front of her, Twilight collapsed into a coma, foaming at the mouth, and her limbs twitching.
“Well if you didn’t like you could just say so.” Rainbow Dash now fed up with everypony’s rudeness, she stormed out of the arboreal abode and flew back to her cloud home.
***
Later that night, while Spike was cleaning the floor around a still convulsive and gurgling body that was Twilight Sparkle, something caught the dragons eye.
“Huh, what’s this?” Spike asked himself as he picked up a singular piece of paper. He held it close to his face, inspecting it, studying it, and overall, reading it intently.
Spectrum Flash, an awesome pony, and Spitfire, an almost as awesome pony, went on an adventure, then they bucked, then shared apple cider. The End.
“Meh. I’ve seen worse.”
