The Moth Wearing a Helmet

by gapty

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Crossover, SCP Foundation, Fluttershy (EqG), Equestria Girls, Comedy
Length: 3074

Fluttershy finds a strange moth trying to sell her its moth helmets.

Even with the Equestrian magic roaming around the world, Fluttershy haven‘t found any strange animals; that was before she finds a moth wanting to sell its moth helmets.

This story is part of the A New Empathy-series, but can be read on its own.

SCP-2598 is from the SCP-universe and was written by "djkaktus".

Published 2022-07-07 22:20:00 UTC
Last updated 2022-07-07 22:20:00 UTC

The Moth Salesman

There are barely any animals Fluttershy would consider weird; all of them are nice, cute and follow their animal instincts. Yet one particular moth was unusual, due to it wearing a small yellow helmet. It behaved however normally like any other moth; due to the instinct of using the moon to navigate at night, it bumped into an outside garden lamp.

“Ehm, hello, little moth. If I may ask, why are you wearing a helmet?”

As much as the events of Fall Summer, Battle of the Bands, Friendship Games etc. had scared her, she was glad to get one of the best gifts in return: the ability to talk to animals. Not like she needed it much before, since she understood the body languages and the needs of the animals already very well, but talking to them like a human opened so many possibilities.

Yet, the moth didn’t talk to her. It flew towards her and bumped into her head. Repeatedly.

“What are you doing, little one? I can understand you.”

It didn’t care, just bumped into her head again.

Maybe it was shy? But if it was, why was it so obnoxious to bump into her? What did it try to accomplish? She asked another moth, who was circling around the lamp.

“He? I don’t know. He really tries to sell me a helmet.”

“Aww.”

As cute as it was, it raised several questions. Why did he try to sell a helmet to another moth? How would the other moth pay for it? Where did it get a helmet?

“But why is he bumping into my head?” she asked.

“Apparently he knows some Morse or something. Don’t ask what that is.”

“Morse? Oh, I know it!”

She remembers the effort several years ago of trying to teach an animal Morse code to speak with it, with no success. Luckily, her hours of studying became useful today with him.

“Alright, start from the beginning, little moth. How are you?”

Hello I am glad that you understand me thanks to the Moth Helm

“Moth Helm? No, I just know Morse code.”

But with the Moth Helm every moth will be able to communicate with you for only the little three payments of nineteen ninety nine.

“I can understand moths and every animal already.” She chuckled. “You can talk to me like you talk to other animals.”

Why do I need to talk normally if I can talk with you thanks to the Moth Helm the best tool to keep your head safe

“I don’t think I will be able to wear a Moth Helm myself.”

Yes but perhaps you have other moths friends that would want to talk to other humans with the great Moth Helm

“I see you’re very insisting on selling the Moth Helm. Maybe I can find someone interested in it.”

That is great everyone needs a Moth Helm it is safe for usage with no choking hazards guaranteed

“You want what from me?” Twilight asked.

If you get a single Moth Helm you can improve your fashion look

“Are you saying my clothing choices are bad taste?”

No but you can improve any outfit and get the hearts of any man with Moth Helm the most fashionable helmet

“I don’t think anyone will notice such a small object on my head.”

Yes but it is about how you will feel wearing the Moth Helm proved by studies to boost the self esteem of the wearers

“I have doubts about the truth in these statements. But why did you bring it to me, Fluttershy?”

“He really wanted to sell his Moth Helms and you know Morse code.”

“But what makes you think I would be interested in buying them?”

There is

“Stop it!” Twilight pushed her head away from the moth. “Seriously, how would one even pay a moth?”

“I don’t know, but I want to help him.”

“Of course you do.” Twilight sighed. “But aren’t you wondering how a moth is able to speak in Morse code and wants to sell a helmet?”

“I do, but I can see him being sad that he is not able to accomplish his dreams.”

“Fine. I know someone who might be interested.”

Fluttershy carefully carried the moth with the cute yellow helmet. It was an interesting animal; not that the other animals weren’t, but his unique behaviour was something she never saw before. She didn’t know where Twilight was leading them, but she was sure that she would know just the right person who would fulfil his wishes. However, once she saw the building of a certain store, she got doubts.

“Welcome to the Flim Flam Brothers’ Everything-Under-the-Sun Emporium! What can we get you?” the two brothers said in union.

“We’re here not to buy, but to sell you something,” Twilight replied.

“Sell something to us? What do you have to offer?”

“Actually, it’s not me who wants to sell, but this moth.”

“A… moth?” Flim asked.

“Listen, we both do scams, you can’t fool us.” Flam crossed his arms.

“No, she’s right, this little cute moth with a helmet really wants to sell his Moth helmets… sorry, they’re called Moth Helms.” Fluttershy carefully grabbed the moth bumping into her head.

“Alright, moth with a helmet, why should we be buying your Moth Helms?”

Immediately the moth flew and collided into Flim’s head, trying to communicate with him.

“Ahh! Get it away from me!”

Flam grabbed the nearest object and swung it at the animal, but missed and hit Flim’s head instead. The object broke into pieces.

“What are you two doing!” Fluttershy shouted and took the moth. “You’re scaring him.”

“It attacked me!” Flim rubbed his head. “You should aim better!”

“How can I aim if it’s so fast!”

“Enough!” Twilight interrupted them. “We’re here for a deal, not to start a conflict. Moth, I will translate for you.”

Fluttershy was happy. The moth with the cute helmet made a great deal with the Flim Flam brothers and got a great sale; now he settled down at her animal rescue centre until he would find a nice house to live in. She wished him all luck in all his unusual, but nice goals in his life.

Telling her friends about the moth at lunch in the school cafeteria was met with doubts, but Twilight confirmed her story.

“But why would a moth want to sell moth-sized helmets? Why does it need money? That makes no darn sense!” Applejack asked.

“He wants to buy a house and start a family,” Fluttershy explained. “When he told me that, I wanted to build him one, but he declined.”

“Can you show him once to me? I want to see how a moth would be wearing a helmet,” Sunset said.

“Me too!” Several others agreed.

Suddenly, the entry doors opened and the Flim Flam brothers entered the cafeteria, playing their guitars.

Were you ever feeling lonely?
Feeling like you need a pet?
Then we’ve got the right thing for you,
It’s a moth with a Moth hat!

Fluttershy looked at her friends, who had the same confused expression on their faces.

Come at the Flim Flam store,
Have a pet you’ve never met.
A supportive, small, cute animal,
A moth wearing a helmet!

No wonder these brothers were so fast to agree with the moth to buy these Moth Helms; they saw an opportunity to make money from it! Fluttershy hoped for their own wellbeing that the moths were not forced into it.

Do you need conformation
That you’re the smartest of the school?
Then get a moth with a helmet
It will tell you she’s a fool.

Do you feel like you lack magic
That the geodes should be yours?
Then get a moth wearing a helmet
It brings you what you deserve

Do you ever have a girlfriend
And find out she is a horse?
Then get a Moth wearing a helmet
In our Flim Flam brothers’ store!

Fluttershy could hear Sunset inhale sharply through her teeth at the last verse, which clearly implied her.

“That’s a strange sight,” Applejack said.

“Moth with a helmet, what a dumb idea to sell. Who cares for it?” Rainbow asked.

“Right?” Applejack said. “Besides, so many students here already have pets, including those they targeted, I doubt they’ll get any sales.”

“And a helmet?” Rarity tossed her hair back with one movement of her head. “I’ll excuse a moth for wanting a helmet, but if humans buy a moth with that outfit, they clearly have no idea of fashion.”

“I just hope the moths they keep are kept well and taken care of,” Fluttershy said. “Otherwise they’ll regret ever having bought the moths!”

“Ehm… okay, Fluttershy, no need to be so scary,” Sunset said. “We could take a look if you want, but I’m sure they are following the laws. And Pinkie Pie…”

“Yes?”

“Stop humming their song.”

The next day Fluttershy entered the school. She was free of all worries, the Flim Flam brothers had taken very well care of the moths and the moth salesman already had found several houses to choose from — whoever was selling them. She was very proud of this little creature; he was proof that one should never stop following their dreams and that with hard work and the help of friends one can achieve everything.

However, once she passed the door, she saw a strange sight; everyone had a pet moth on a leash.

So the advertisement song actually had success… somehow. She didn‘t understand why so many of them would want a moth pet; not like they weren‘t cute, but by experience she knew that other animals are more popular choices for a pet.

“Rainbow Dash! You‘re here.”

“Oh, hi Fluttershy! How is the moth salesman doing?”

“He‘s fine, he even found a girlfriend already and will decide today which house he‘ll buy.”

“That‘s awesome!”

“I didn‘t expect anyone to buy the moths from Flim and Flam.”

“Me neither. Who would even want a moth as a pet?”

“Ehm, Rainbow…” Fluttershy said, but got ignored.

“There are so many other animals which are way cooler, like a tortoise!”

“But Rainbow…”

“Seriously, just because some guys sing a song doesn‘t mean you have to follow what they do. I mean it was awesome that our Cafeteria song helped Twilight, but this was clearly just an advertisement.”

“Then why do you have one of your own?" Fluttershy pointed to the moth Rainbow held the leash of.

“Oh, this is Speedy, the fastest moth. Isn‘t she awesome? Flam told me that there are several moth races going and she always wins them!”

Fluttershy looked at the moth, who was indeed flying very quickly, taking sharp turns and never being in one place.

“Ehm, sure… Hi Speedy, are you alright?”

“Of course I am! Can‘t wait to challenge Rainbow to a race!”

“What did she say?” Rainbow asked.

Fluttershy translated it to her.

“That… is… awesome! You are truly the best moth!”

“I doubt that, darling,” Rarity interrupted them. “My moth is clearly more fashionable.”

Fluttershy sighed. So Rarity got one too; and of course she somehow dressed it up in a — she had to admit it — cute outfit.

“A moth and fashion? Rarity, this time you are going too far.” Rainbow laughed.

“Don‘t laugh, you clearly have no interest in taking care of a moth. It wants to be beautiful, it wants to impress!”

“Oh, really? Because mine is interested in racing me, am I right, Fluttershy?”

She nodded.

“Hah, clearly your moth doesn‘t know the value of fashion.”

Fluttershy sighed and spoke to Rarity‘s moth.

“Hello, friend, how are you?”

“She is so great!” he replied.

“Who?”

“Rarity! She‘s soo beautiful; her look, her outfit… I can‘t stop admiring her!”

“Ehm…”

“Is she taken? Ask her if she wants to go on a date with me!”

“What did it say?” Rarity asked.

“Uhh… he likes his outfit.” Fluttershy stroke her strand nervously.

“See! He has the right values!” Rarity walked away with a raised head.

“Can‘t believe so many went to buy a moth,” Twilight said to Fluttershy and Sunset.

“Me too, as much as I find a moth with a helmet interesting, paying 25 bucks for them is too much,” Sunset said.

“Even then, we have a moth salesman at Fluttershy, why would our friends buy one?”

“Yeah, Rarity and Rainbow bought one,” Fluttershy muttered.

“Not only them,” Twilight added, “Applejack got one too. Don‘t ask why, she somehow thinks it‘s a hard worker.”

“And Pinkie Pie,” Sunset said, “but with her it was predictable.”

Fluttershy wasn‘t sure what to think of the situation. On one point she was glad that many found interests in a pet, and the moths were —somehow— fitting for their owners, but on the other hand no one would care for them weren‘t it for the helmets the moths wore, not even speaking of the high prize the Flim Flam brothers sold them.

But whatever situation arrived, she would help these moths whenever needed! Many had came to her, asking for translations or general advice on how to treat them, such as now when Trixie approached her.

“Greetings, Fluttershy! The Great and Powerful Trrrixie seeks advice for this particular moth.”

“Just like any moth, feed…”

“No! Not this moth, Trixie tried everything like the internet said, but it refuses everything and acts strange. Maybe you can figure out what is wrong with him.”

“Sure. Hi, little moth, how are you feeling? Is everything alright?”

“Behold, planet earth, for I, Theus, will conquer this planet!”

Fluttershy backed up. It was a deep voice for a moth, but from the look of Trixie still not understandable for other humans.

“I‘m sorry, what?”

“I come from another dimension, one where I was imprisoned for thousands of years. But now I am set free, for the portal has been opened with the blood of a virgin!”

“What does it say?” Trixie asked.

“One moment… Trixie, did you get it from the Flim Flam brothers?”

“Yes.”

“Are you telling me the truth?”

“I… Look, I didn‘t have 25 bucks for a moth, okay?”

“How did you get it?”

Trixie gave an unintelligible sound.

“I don‘t understand you.”

“Trixie doesn‘t know, she was playing with her new cards when she cut her fingers! Then the moth came out of my hat, which honestly really feels heavy today, and I kept him.”

“I see… What do you want here, little moth?”

“Don‘t call me little, you pathetic creature! Theus knows that you worship these creatures and treat them like gods, so I took their form. Soon, I will become the king of moths, and then your race will worship me too!”

Fluttershy hid her chuckle with her hand.

“Oh, that‘s very smart! What will you then do?”

“Once I will be ruler of the world, I will enjoy your suffering! Torture and death will be seen daily, and I will enjoy every moment of it, starting with you!”

“Oh, I‘m so impressed!” Fluttershy said.

“Is Trixie‘s moth also Great and Powerful?”

“Indeed he is! Just treat him like a normal moth, he‘ll get used to it.”

“You fool! Tell her that she‘s my eternal slave now! She shall bring me a sacrifice of a first-born of her kind!”

“Thank you, Fluttershy! Trixie already has many great acts she‘ll do with this moth!”

“You‘re welcome!”

During math class, Mr. Doodle ordered for the moths to be in the back of the room to not distract the students, thus making the moths all be in speaking range with each other. This was a great opportunity for Fluttershy to see if Theus was any real threat, even if she doubted it.

“Behold, my subjects! I, Theus, am now your new ruler!”

“Ruler? Hah, are you faster than me? I bet that until you fly to the door I will be flying around the school at least five times!”

“How dare you say that to me! I‘m a being of another dimension, I will rule this planet!”

“With this outfit? Haha! Look at me, if anyone is a ruler, it‘s me! Oh, Rarity, how much I wish to be with you…”

Fluttershy still shuddered from this particular moth, he was so strange…

“Forget the outfits or this stupid helmet! I—”

“How dare you say something against these great helmets!”

“Do you have any taste?”

“Not cool, man, not cool!”

“Be ashamed to say that!”

“Fine, the helmets are nice. But you treat your slaves too good! Follow me and my path, and I will show you the joy of their suffering and pain!”

“Are on the path muffins?”

“No. Why would there be muffins?”

“Then I don‘t care.”

“Ugh, fine, there will be muffins…”

“Yay!”

“I don‘t see the joy when you don‘t work. There is no bigger joy than seeing the fruits of your hard works.”

“Why would anyone want to work if you have slaves?”

“Oh, I see then what a lazy moth and a dosser you are! Hard work is the meaning of life!”

“Technically, the meaning of life is indeterminable. I prefer we research these lights at night and find a way to adjust our inner navigators to use them as a compass too.”

“Oh shut up nerd!”

“Who cares for these lights? We need to party, we need more bass!”

“You and your bass. I would say we unite and start a choir, this way we will be a nice addition to the string quartet.”

“Stupid, stupid, stupid! You all seek for forgettable desires; I will offer immortality gained through their pains!”

“But how will we bring them joy if they suffer? That doesn‘t sound happy at all! I say we make a surprise party with a beautiful cotton cloth for them to eat!”

“No! They need to bleed, they need to suffer, they need to beg for the end of their miserable existence!“

“Ugh, you and your suffering. Anyone down for a race after this class?”

“I’m in.”

“Me too.”

“See yourself in last place, loser!”

“Oh, the competition is on!”

“—tershy!”

Fluttershy put her mind back to the class.

“Yes, Mr. Doodle?”

“I’ve been calling you several times now. Please concentrate on the class!”

“I‘m sorry, it won‘t happen again.”

There were indeed no dangers coming from Theus, and the moth salesman lived happily ever after.