Irrelevant

Chapters

I'd be anything for you, but I'll never fit the bill
In your excellence, I forgot I used to have my own
And I'm only your everything when you feel alone
The worst part of it all, is that I desperately still want someone who never wanted me
And who the hell are you, for the hell you've put me through
Let's start at the end, becoming strangers once again.
You won't even notice that I'm gone

I'd be anything for you, but I'll never fit the bill

"Hah, I should have known after you took that fall with nary a scratch!"

Fiola winced at the memory. "That still stung, lemme tell ya. But yeah, it's better than dyin'." They were sitting in the kitchen of her house, and she took another gulp of her cider as she waited for her friend to respond.

After finishing her own drink, Storm Front shrugged. "You should not have been in the way if you didn't wish to be blown away. Still, would that I had ponies like you under my command rather than those weaklings that caused my defeat."

Fiola held her tongue as she went to refill their glasses. It took some effort not to point out that it was clear the duke had sent her on a suicide mission, but instead she simply said, "You've lived a tragic life, Storm, but it's helped you grow stronger, like a forest regrowing after it gets set on fire."

Storm Front snorted. "Save your platitudes, Fiola. I had everything taken from me after that campaign failed, but I am not so foolish to believe it to be the work of a higher power."

A pang of guilt lanced through Fiola's heart. "I guess we all make our own decisions."

"Quite." From behind, she heard Storm Front stand up and trot over to her. "My troops chose to fail me, and died for it. But you won't, will you, Fiola?"

A hoof brushed against Fiola's withers, and the earth pony mare shivered. "I won't leave you like they did," she promised with all her heart.

"I've seen the way you look at me," Storm Front whispered into her ear. "I know of your desires. Once, I thought you weak, but now that I know your secret, I see that you are the only mare who can see my true glory."

It was getting hard to think, and Fiola's breath caught in her throat. "You ain't wrong about that," she mumbled under her breath, though still loud enough for Storm to heat.

"Come, let's continue this conversation somewhere more comfortable." Storm's hoof guided Fiola out of the kitchen and towards the bedroom. "I have nothing left but you, friend, but perhaps you can make the rest of my days less miserable."

"I'll do my best," Fiola promised. And she meant it. Until the end of Storm's days, she would be there for her, just as she had once been there for Hurricane until her end.

"Huh, so you're immortal but still an Earth Pony?"

"Yup." Fiddle nodded, bracing herself for Lightning's reaction. This part always played out a little differently once they processed the revelation, and it wasn't always pretty. Part of her was already cringing on the inside in anticipation of Lightning's anger at her for not doing more with her eternal life. That was always the accusation that stung the most, because it was more true than any of them would ever know.

"Umm, okay then." There was an awkward pause as they both sipped at their cider, staring at each other over the rims of their cups. "Huh, honestly not really sure what to do with that information. I guess for me you're still the same Fiddlesticks who decided to talk to a random mare in a bar a few months ago."

Suppressing the familiar guilt that now resided full-time in her heart, Fiddlesticks gave her a weak smile. "Just because I'm old doesn't mean I don't know how to have fun."

Lightning rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah." She sighed. "Honestly, the biggest question I have is why you're hanging out with me of all ponies? You probably know all sorts of famous and powerful creatures, but here you are, sitting in some run-down house in the middle of some run-down city talking to a run-down mare."

"You're far from run-down, darlin'," Fiddle drawled, trying to avoid the question.

With a scoff, Lightning leaned back into her worn-down sofa. "Compared to the Princesses? I'm nopony."

"You're somepony to me," Fiddle said with more emotion than she was expecting. She was used to her companion being despondent, but it was never this bad. "Even if nopony else sees it."

"Well, I guess I should just consider myself lucky that you put up with my shitty housecleaning enough to come over."

Fiddle chuckled. "I've seen worse. You should see what an Apple Family barn looks like after a reunion."

"Guess you've been to a lot of those." Lightning shook her head. "Just when I thought my life couldn't get any weirder, I find out that the only friend I have left is gonna live for-freaking-ever. Got any good stories?"

Fiddle smiled. "Lemme tell ya about what really happened during the Manehattan Succession Crisis a few hundred years ago. That one's a real hoot." With that, the tension began to fade away, and Fiddle simply enjoyed the company of Lightning as she let this opportunity pass. There'd be other chances to make her move, but now wasn't the time, and that was okay.

After all, she had all the time in the world.

In your excellence, I forgot I used to have my own

The door slammed open as Gale Force stormed into the house.

Fiddly Twang looked up from the sheet music she was studying to address her roomate. "Is everything alright, Gale?"

Gale let out a growl as she stomped over towards her, fuming the whole while. "Brass Quill visited the factory today. Sun-forsaken coward wouldn't even look me in the eye when he gave his whole speech about how it was the ponies that made the company great rather than the machines."

Fiddly winced. "He's the one that...?"

"The one who stabbed me in the back before I met you, yeah." Gale looked like she was moments away from spitting on the floor in rage. "Bastard told the higher-ups about our side hustle and got me transferred over to this shithole, and now he's a bigwig up in HQ living the life I should've had."

"I'm sorry you had to see him again," Fiddly said softly.

"Yeah, well, I think we're all sorry considering I socked him in the face after the speech."

Fiddly sucked in a sharp breath. "Aw shucks. That ain't good."

"I deserved the promotion, not him," Gale seethed. "Sure, we were both skimming a little off the top, but I was still making the Fillydelphia factory the most profitable subsidiary in Equestria."

"What happened after that?" Fiddly asked, bracing herself for the answer.

"I'm suspended for a week," Gale replied. "Then they'll decide what to do. I'm not apologizing, though. When I heard he was coming to visit, I thought we could bury the hatchet and move on, but after seeing him saying all that shit up there, I realized that it wasn't gonna happen. Everypony's ready to watch me burn if it helps them get ahead, so screw 'em all."

"I've found that most ponies are like that," Fiddly commented. She stood up and walked over towards the raging mare. "I'm here for you, though. You know that, right?"

Gale let out a sigh. "Yeah, I know." She tried to give Fiddly a small smile, but it soon turned into a grimace. "Guess in the grand scheme of things I'm just a blip in your life, anyways."

"You're way more than that, darlin'." This was her chance. Fiddly reached out and slowly stroked Gale's mane. "I care about ya more than you could know." Summoning up all her courage, she leaned in, making her intentions clear.

Gale's eyes widened in realization, but a moment later she closed them and leaned in as well, and the two of them shared a passionate kiss, Fiddly taking all of Gale's anger as they devoured one another, the pegasus clinging to her last lifeline in this cruel world.

"Oh, wow." Gale said afterwards, her rage having been transmuted into confusion and desire. "I never knew you felt that way about me, Fiddly."

"I've been in love with you for a long, long time," Fiddly replied. "Just never knew how to tell ya."

Gale chuckled, but there was still a bitter note in it. "Guess this beats thinking about that limp-dick asshole." She sighed again. "Maybe I'll go say sorry and see if I can keep my job. Unless you wanna pay my half of the rent too."

"I can afford it," Fiddly admitted. "And you don't have to do anything you don't wanna. I'll support ya no matter what. Always have, always will."

"Thanks, Fiddly," Gale said, completely oblivious to just how true Fiddly's statement was. "Screw 'em all, I guess. I've got you, and I don't need anyone else."

"And I don't need anyone except you either, Gale." Fiddly leaned in for another kiss, escaping from her eternity for a little while longer as she experienced love once again.

"Hey, Lightning." Fiddlesticks waved her friend over as Lightning walked into the café. The pegasus mare looked distracted, barely waving back as she trotted over. "What's on yer mind?"

"I ran into Rainbow Dash today," Lightning replied, taking a seat.

"Oh." Fiddle put on her best sympathetic expression, ready to comfort her even as a spark of excitement flared up in her heart. Was this her chance?

"Yeah." Lightning flipped open the menu. "Wish they had booze here," she commented as she read through it.

"That bad, huh?"

Lightning sighed as she set down the menu. "Not exactly. We... talked." She shook her head. "Stars, but I was such an idiot back then. Nearly killed all the Elements of Harmony once, and then nearly got one of the Elements' sister killed."

Something was wrong. This wasn't how this conversation was supposed to go. Fiddle felt her excitement turn to panic. "She ruined your dreams, though," she pointed out. "Twice."

"Yeah, well, maybe I deserved to have them ruined," Lightning replied, and there was a sad smile on her face now. "Not like she meant to do it. All this time, I was so mad at her, but she was just... I don't know. She said she was sorry for what happened to me, said maybe she could get me another chance at the Bolts."

Ice frosted over Fiddle's heart. "That's wonderful news, darlin'," she said through teeth gritted into a smile.

Lightning laughed. "I said thanks but no thanks. I'm too old for that shit, and I wasn't interested in a handout from one of the Elements."

At least some of her old pride still remained. Fiddle resisted the urge to breathe a sigh of relief. "Well, you've still got me, no matter what," she said weakly, knowing the chances were low but still needing to try.

"Yeah," Lightning replied. "I really appreciate you sticking around. Guess you don't have anything better to do this century, huh?"

Fiddle shook her head. "Nowhere else I'd rather be, sugar."

"Aww." This time, Lightning's smile was more genuine. It was lovely to see, despite Fiddle feeling yet another opportunity slip away. "Anyways, emotionally draining chats also make me hungry. What're you having?"

As Lightning picked up the menu, Fiddle tried to focus on her friend and their conversation, but the dread she'd felt before remained, sitting uncomfortably within her heart.

Still, she didn't let it get her down too much. She'd done this many times before, and even if this iteration was one of the more challenging ones, she had millenia of experience.

Lightning Dust would be hers eventually.

Destiny would not be denied.

And I'm only your everything when you feel alone

The crowd applauded as Fiddle Faddle let the final note fade out on her current namesake, her eyes fixed on the most important member of the audience.

Thunderbolt's eyes were locked onto her, a look of pure wonder on her face that Fiddle had seen before, but which never failed to lift her spirits. As always, though, it was tinged with a hint of something else, a slight frown that Fiddle had also become familiar with.

Things were going according to plan, then.

"Thanks, y'all," she said, addressing the room. "It's been wonderful playing for ya. Enjoy the rest of your night, ya hear?"

Another round of applause accompanied Fiddle's exit as she made her way into one of the club's backrooms. She took a deep breath, appreciating the lack of cigarette smoke here. Awful habit, that, and one that Fiddle was sad to see returning in such a more odious form, but it'd fall out of style eventually, she hoped.

A few moments later, the door opened to reveal Thunderbolt being escorted by one of the security guards. "Hey, Fiddle."

"Thunder!" Fiddle grinned. "Glad you could make it!"

"Hey, no way I'm missing a chance to see how good someone that lives forever can be at music," Thunder replied. There was a slight reservation in her tone, and the way her stance hunched in on itself was unusual for the stunt flyer.

"What'd ya think?" Fiddle asked, trying to hide her nervousness under her usual country charm. Just because nothing had gone wrong yet didn't mean it wouldn't now. "This old mare still know a few tricks?"

"Definitely." Thunder smiled. "With those skills, you could be world-famous, you know?"

Fiddle shook her head. "That life ain't for me."

"Weird." With a sigh, Thunder sat down across from her. "I can't imagine that. I'd kill for just another chance to prove myself, to have everypony watching me and loving me again, instead of being a washed-up star who got wrecked by a drug scandal."

"Hey, you've still got me," Fiddle argued. "When I was playing out there, I only cared about what you'd think. Sometimes it just takes having one pony to care about to make it all worth it." There it was, planting the seed in her mind again. She was so close, now, to getting what she wanted.

"Well, I guess one's better than zero. I just..." Thunder let out a soft growl as her teeth clenched. "I wish everyone could see me like you do," she said. "Everypony else only sees what I've done wrong, and then won't give me another chance. It's not fair. Why couldn't the Fates have blessed me with immortality instead, so I could have all those chances like you did?"

"Life ain't fair," Fiddle said as sympathetically as she could. "And as long as I'm here, who needs those other ponies?" Heart pounding in her chest, she reached out a hoof to cup her friend's cheek. "I'll give you all the chances in the world."

She heard Thunder's breath catch in her throat. "Fiddle, you...?"

Fiddle nodded, unable to speak under the pressure in her own throat.

"Screw it, why not?" With that romantic declaration, Thunder leaned in to kiss Fiddle, who would have breathed out a sigh of relief if she wasn't consumed by passion.

Fiddlesticks was careful about when and where she played her music.

She was good at it. Very good, having had so many lifetimes to practice. But she also wasn't one for the limelight, had never been, really, and too many public performances would attract attention from ponies, make it harder to blend into the background.

The Apples could be trusted, so that was one opportunity for her to let loose. She also occasionally popped into the local clubs, playing a quick set before disappearing again.

As for playing in front of Lightning Dust, well, that was... complicated. It was one thing if she was just in the audience, as she was now, clapping and cheering with the rest of the crowd. But Fiddle had never let Lightning listen to her playing while they were both alone, because she knew that she wouldn't be able to help pouring out her soul into her song, and if Lightning saw that and rejected her...

This was safer. Fiddle played for everyone in attendance, summoned forth the wonder and joy and love she had felt over the centuries and put them into her song, enchanted the crowd with her music. And when she was finished her final encore, they would all leave happy, with a new memory to treasure for the rest of their days.

Fiddle was familiar with the song and dance by now, as it were, and so afterwards, she waited patiently backstage for Lightning to come to her. That was what mattered.

"Wow," the pegasus mare said as she entered the room and walked into her trap. "That was awesome!"

"Thanks, Lightning," Fiddle replied with a grin. "Glad ya liked it."

"I loved it." Lightning smiled. "You know, you could totally be world-famous if you wanted with those skills."

Fiddle rolled her eyes playfully. She'd had this conversation so many times before that she almost knew the answer by rote. "I ain't that kinda mare. The princesses and chaos spirits and whatever other immortals can have all of Equestria cursing or praising their names. All I need is good food, a roof over my head, and a song to play along with." She left off the last item on her list, waiting to see Lightning's response.

With a sigh, Lightning took a seat across from her. "Man, I wish I could be like you sometimes." She paused. "Well, honestly, a lot of the time."

Was this the opening that Fiddle needed? Her heart began to race as she casually tilted her head in curiosity. "How's that, darlin'?"

"You're so... content, with what you've got," Lightning said. "I wish I could be happy like you. Part of me still wants to make it big, even though I know that'll never happen now. I wish I could just give up on that."

"That ain't you." This was something Fiddle had learned well by now. "You're always gonna want to reach for the stars. That's what I love about ya."

The words had slipped out so naturally that Fiddle didn't even realize it until a moment later. Her breath caught in her throat as she waited to see what Lightning would say in response.

The other mare leaned over to pat her on the foreleg. "I'm lucky to have such a good friend, Fiddle. Anyways, I shouldn't hold you down with my own shit, not when you just rocked the crowd out there. You did good."

"Thanks," Fiddle said numbly. "And it's no trouble. I know you ain't got anyone else to talk to, and I'm always happy to be here for ya." She was basically operating on autopilot right now, relying on centuries of experience to guide her through this conversation while her mind reeled.

"I really appreciate it," Lightning replied. "So, you wanna grab some dinner?"

Fiddle nodded mutely, her heart breaking.

"Great!" Lightning grinned. "I'll wait for you outside, then?"

"Sure."

With that, Lightning made her exit, leaving Fiddle to stew in her loss. This hadn't ever happened before. Not like this. She'd only ever been rejected once before, a very, very long time ago, and she'd learned how to make sure it never happened again.

Fiddle shook her head, trying to clear it of her despair. She was over a thousand years old, had seen Equestria itself rise up from nothing into a great nation. She wasn't just going to give up now.

Fate would not be denied.

But maybe Fate needed a little bit of a push.

The worst part of it all, is that I desperately still want someone who never wanted me

It had taken weeks for Smart Cookie to build up the courage to confess her feelings.

Somehow, despite her regularly telling the leaders of Equestria off for their foolishness, this felt different. It was easy to determine why, of course. One's duty to the nation was very different from one's romantic thoughts, after all.

Still, Cookie was no coward, had helped forge this new nation from the shadows. And she was certain that she belonged with Hurricane.

The three Equestrian leaders each had their own office in Castel Everfree. Hurricane's was at the very top of the East Tower, as close as she could be to the skies. "Come in," the mare said, her voice as rough as her personality.

Cookie stepped inside. "Howdy, Hurricane," she said with a polite curtsy.

"That's Commander Hurricane to you," Hurricane corrected. "If I have to share power with those other two grounders then I will at least be addressed properly."

"Sorry, Commander." Cookie took a deep breath to steady herself.

"Whatever, not like I can expect anypony to have any respect for my position anymore." At least Hurricane had put down her papers to focus her attention on Cookie. "So, what business brings you here, advisor?"

"It's somethin' personal, Commander." Cookie stepped forward, her love and desire winning out over fear as she spoke clearly and confidently. "I... you're an amazin' mare, Hurricane." Before she could be corrected, Cookie spoke on, her words coming out in a hurried rush. "I love your passion and your strength and your dedication and your grace and you're so beautiful and..." She paused, putting every ounce of emotion in her next words. "I love you, Hurricane. And I'd love to court ya if you'd let me." She paused now, waiting with bated breath as the object of her affections stared at her for an eternal, silent second.

And then Hurricane laughed.

It wasn't a loving, joyous laughter, like what Cookie imagined she would hear once they were together. No, Hurricane's laughter was mocking, an ugly thing that tore her heart to shreds.

"You must be joking," the pegasus commander said when she caught her breath again. "Why would I ever deign to lower myself to you? A Commander should have a partner worthy of her position, not some earth pony advisor who couldn't swing a sword to save her own life."

"I..." Cookie didn't know what to say. She loved Hurricane, with all her heart. "Please, I might not be a great warrior like you, but I'll be faithful and loyal to you. Promise."

"If I wanted to somepony to follow me around, I'd just get a dog." Hurricane scoffed. "Return to your duties, advisor, and let us not speak of this again."

Despite the dismissal, Cookie still had to try one more time. "I'll always be here for ya, Hurricane," she said quietly. "No matter what."

"I told you to use my title," Hurricane admonished. "Whatever, I've got a bunch of boring paperwork to do, so please take your leave."

Finally, with her heart in pieces, Cookie did as instructed, giving another curtsy before she left the office. Her cheeks burned with shame and anger, but she couldn't bring herself to hate Hurricane. Not when she still loved her so much.

It didn't matter that she had been rejected— Cookie intended to fulfill that promise, and to remain by Hurricane's side until her end.

But, she was also smart enough to recognize that Hurricane wasn't a good leader, that if she were to continue in her position, Equestria would be stillborn. No, this conversation had convinced Cookie that whatever she felt for her, she also had to do what was right for this nation.

Perhaps it would be wise to whisper in a few ears, to plant the seeds that would lead to a better leader being installed for the pegasi. Pansy would not be a good candidate, but it might be worth speaking to her to determine a good successor. Once she had that determined, Cookie could maneuver conditions to have them take over.

And a part of her hoped that maybe, just maybe, if Hurricane wasn't burdened with the duties of a Commander, didn't feel like she had to pick a partner of equal standing, then they could be together, just as Cookie had dreamed.

It was a faint hope, but Cookie clung to it as she cried outside of Hurricane's office.

Fiddlesticks was starting to get desperate.

She'd exhausted every scenario she could think of, and still she hadn't found the right moment to confess outright yet. Lightning wasn't picking up on any of her hints, either, and at this point she'd tried recreating every moment from her past that had led to finally being with her true love.

So, it was time to get back to basics. Fiddle was a simple mare, and sometimes the simplest solution was the best.

Which was why, after a long day at work, Lightning had found her friend waiting for her with a bottle of brandy. "I'm not really into hard liquor," she commented dryly as she closed the door behind her.

"You'll like this one," Fiddle said with complete confidence. It was one of those odd quirks of Fate that kept turning out to be true. She poured out some of the golden liquid into a glass of ice.

Raising an eyebrow in doubt, Lightning nevertheless took the proffered drink and brought it to her lips. "Huh." Another sip. "Okay, yeah, this is pretty good."

"Told ya. So, how was your day?"

As they drank, Lightning and Fiddle talked, with Fiddle refilling Lightning's glass every time it got low. Soon enough, as expected, Lightning's low tolerance for anything stronger than wine kicked in and the mare was slurring her words as she spoke.

That was when Fiddle enacted the next stage of her plan. "So, tell me about the Elements," she said casually, taking another sip from her glass and enjoying the light buzz in her head.

Lightning looked confused. "Eh, what's there to tell?"

"Well, they ruined your life, right?" The advantage of Lightning being drunk was that Fiddle didn't have to beat around the bush anymore.

Lightning snorted. "Yeah. But I deserved it."

"Did ya, though?" Fiddle goaded. "It was just a couple of mistakes. And they took everything from you over it. That don't sound too sporting to me."

"It..." Finally, for the first time, there was anger flaring in Lightning's eyes. "Fine, yeah. I'm pissed. Just because they're important ponies, they get their way, and the rest of us have to take whatever shit they throw at us."

"I'm sorry," Fiddle said sympathetically.

"Those assholes did so much worse, and they're heroes." Lightning didn't even seem to have heard Fiddle's comment. "Meanwhile, I try to get ahead even a little and I get stomped down. It's not fair, and I hate it."

Before her eyes, Fiddle saw Lightning transform, her usual depression transmuting into anger as she stood up and loudly on the floor. Her heart raced at the passion in Lightning's voice as she kept ranting. "If that stupid filly had just done what I told her, if the Elements hadn't just decided to go on a fucking balloon trip during a live training exercise, I'd be a star right now. It'd be me performing all over Equestria, with the crowds kissing my hooves."

She threw the glass to the ground, and it shattered into glittering pieces. "Fuck it all. I don't even know why I bother anymore, when the world just keeps shitting on me."

"I'll be here for you," Fiddle assured her. "Don't matter if the whole world's against you." This was it, the moment she'd been waiting for. Lightning would realize that Fiddle was the only mare who would love her, and they would be together again.

"Yeah, well, fuck you too." The venom in Lightning's voice shocked Fiddle, throwing off her script entirely. "Fuck you for giving me something to hope for, just so that Fate or Harmony or Celestia can take it away from me too."

"W-What do you mean?" Fiddle asked, panic flaring up in her mind as she struggled to find a way to salvage this situation.

"I know you got the hots for me," Lightning replied, and though she was still clearly drunk, her words were as sharp as usual. "I'm not blind. But everything I touch turns to shit, and I can't do that to you. You're too good for me. So just, get out while there's still a chance for both of us, and fuck you for letting me get hurt one more time."

She stomped over to the door and slammed it open so hard that it knocked the dust from the nearby windowsills. Fiddle just stared at her in horror, until Lightning punched her forehoof against the wall, startling her. "I said get out!"

Wordlessly, Fiddle did so, staring at Lightning's angry, hopeless eyes one last time before making her way out. "I'm sorry," she said.

"Yeah, me too," Lightning said with another snort.

Fiddle shook her head. Lightning didn't understand, didn't know what Fiddle had done. The guilt that normally gnawed at her heart was not clawing away at her soul, trying to plunge it into Tartarus. Lightning was more right than she knew, and that knowledge was what kept Fiddle from saying anything more as she made her way out of the pegasus mare's house.

It seemed it was finally time to pay the price for her sins.

And who the hell are you, for the hell you've put me through

There was a knock at Fiddlesticks' door the next morning, as expected.

"Come in," Fiddle said, trying to keep her voice light and causal despite the dread forming a pit in her stomach.

Lightning trotted in, her movements slow and precise, like she was trying not to startle Fiddle. "Hi," she said awkwardly. "I, uhh... we should probably talk, huh?"

"Yeah."

"I...I'm sorry," Lightning said, head still hung low. "I really wish you didn't have to see me like that."

"It's alright, darlin'." Fiddle tried to give her a smile. "I wanna see everything that makes you who you are."

"But I don't want that to be me," Lightning argued. "I don't like being mad all the time. It sucks, and it makes me hurt the ponies around me. That's how I lost Short Fuse and Rolling Thunder." She sighed. "I get it if you don't want to talk to me for a bit too. Or forever, I guess."

"I told ya that I'd stand by you, and that ain't gonna change," Fiddle assured her.

"Because you've got a crush on me." They both winced at the bluntness of Lightning's tone. "Sorry, I suck at being diplomatic and stuff."

"It's fine," Fiddle said. "It's fine. That's one of the things I lo— like about you."

"I don't get it." Lightning gestured towards her with a hoof. "You're like, some amazing immortal musician who's been around for thousands of years. You're patient and smart and funny and really, really pretty, and you could have so many better partners if you wanted. Why me? I'm not anypony special."

"Oh, darlin'." Fiddle had thought her heart broken before, but this was... She couldn't hold it back anymore. "I'm so, so sorry."

It had never been about Fate. It had always been about her own selfishness.

"Wait, why are you sorry?" Lightning asked, confused.

"I... You might wanna sit down, sugar." Fiddle could already feel the tears forming in her eyes, knew it would only get worse from here. "There's something I gotta tell ya."

"Alright?" Still looking confused, Lightning did as Fiddle asked, taking a seat opposite from her. "What's wrong, Fiddle?"

"Lotta things." Fiddle took a deep breath, steeling herself, before speaking further. "I told ya I was immortal, right?" She waited for Lightning to nod before continuing. "Well, what I didn't tell ya is that you are too, sorta."

Lightning blinked slowly. "Uhh, pretty sure I'd know if I was a thousand years old."

"Not you, exactly, but your soul," Fiddle explained. "You're the reincarnation of my first wife, Hurricane. After you died the first time, Clover helped me find a way to track you down every time you were born again."

"Oh, that's..." Lightning paused. "Gonna need a minute to process that."

Fiddle nodded. For several agonizingly long seconds, Lightning didn't say anything. Several times, she opened her mouth as if to speak, then closed it again, simply staring at Fiddle as if expecting her to suddenly declare the whole thing a joke.

"Okay, so I'm the reincarnation of... wait a sec, you said Hurricane and Clover." Lightning's eyes narrowed. "You mean I was the Commander Hurricane in a past life?"

"Yup."

"That's... huh." Lightning chuckled bitterly. "Wow, how the mighty have fallen. It must suck to see the mare you fell in love with like this. I'm probably disappointing a whole line of heroes right now."

"That's just the thing," Fiddle said. "By the time Hurricane took me in, she'd already gotten exiled from Equestria."

"Wait, she got exiled?"

"It got buried in the histories, but yeah, the ponies didn't want her as their leader after a while." Another pause, as Fiddle cast her mind back to remember all their past lives. "After that, you got reborn as Storm Front, and you led the pegasi division of the EUP until you got in over your head and got a whole battalion killed. Then you were Wind Chill, who lost a wing trying to prove she could make it to Yakyakistan in the middle of a blizzard."

Lightning winced at that. "I'm starting to sense a pattern here."

Fiddle nodded. "Light Wing got dishonorably discharged from the Royal Guard, Gale Force was embezzling money from the Fillydelphia Weather Factory and got transferred to a backwater town in the middle o' nowhere, and Feather Zap was arrested for assault after she lost herself to her cups."

"Wow, okay. So I'm a loser in every life, good to know." Lightning seemed to be taking all these revelations in stride, but Fiddle assumed that it just hadn't sunk in for her yet. "I guess that gets me back to my first question: why me? Why date somepony who just keeps ruining her life?"

"Because yer an amazing mare, Lightning," Fiddle said. "You're passionate, and strong, and I love talkin' to ya in every life. No matter what, we end up clicking. But..."

This was it, Fiddle's last chance to back out and leave things like this. She was sure that Lightning would be much more open to being courted by Fiddle after learning all of this, and the cycle could continue to play out as Fate intended.

Except, it wasn't Fate's hoof behind Lightning's misery, and it was time for Fiddle to stop hiding behind it.

"'Cept for the first time, we only meet after you've gone done and screwed the pooch," Fiddle said, fully committed now. "And the first time, you wanted nothin' to do with me 'til after I got ya exiled. Clover told me that you'd do it over and over again, tryin' to reach for the stars and then fallin'. She also told me that it didn't have to be that way, not if I got there before you did whatever fool thing messed up yer life and knocked some sense into ya."

"So you're saying you could've saved me from all of this, but you didn't?" And there it was, the first sparks of anger in Lightning's eyes, which threatened to burn down everything Fiddle had built.

"I thought, if you had somethin' else going for ya, you wouldn't want me," Fiddle said quietly. "That's what happened the first time, and since then, you've always been so focused on being great, there wasn't any way you'd settle for me." She sighed. "I knew I wasn't good enough for ya, so I had to make sure you didn't have a better choice." With that, she waited for Lightning's rejection, the small peace in her heart eclipsed by overwhelming dread.

Once again, Lightning was silent. And then, she started laughing hysterically, a hacking, ugly sound that was filled with bitterness and regret.

"I can't believe this." She said when she could finally breathe again. "I don't even know what to say. Apparently, I'm such a shitty person that I'm doomed to fuck things up for all eternity, and I fucked up my soulmate so badly that she's too scared to save me." She waved her forelegs helplessly. "What the hell am I supposed to do with this information?"

"I don't know," Fiddle said honestly. "I'm sorry."

"Well, what did all the other versions of me say when you told them?" Lightning asked.

"I never did." The words came out in a near-whisper. "Always was too much of a darn coward to admit it."

"So why now?" Lightning pressed on. "What's different this time?"

"You are," Fiddle said. "I've never seen ya like this before. You're always so angry at the world, at the ponies holding you back. That's how I got ya to be with me, by tellin' you that I was the only pony who would stand with you. But this time, you were just sad. I didn't... I don't know what it means, but I think you've changed."

"Great, now I have depression instead of anger issues." Lightning snorted. "Guess that's an upgrade."

"You also..." Fiddle swallowed, finding it hard to say the words out loud. "You've never been this nice to me before."

Lightning stared at her. "You've gotta be kidding me." She shook her head. "If I was even more of an asshole before, why are you even here?"

"You weren't all bad." Fiddle felt a surge of anger herself at how Lighting was describing her past selves. "I loved listening to you talk about flying or whether or whatever else you were really into that life, and you always let me watch you perform, and you always came home to me in the end."

"Wow, I did the bare minimum and also let you fawn over me. I'm a real catch." Lightning rolled her eyes. "You need some standards, girl."

"It's more than that. It's—" Fiddle was finding it harder and harder to explain just what drew her to Lightning's past selves. It had never been something she'd questioned before, had followed her heart from the start, but with the knowledge and supposed wisdom of centuries finally turned inwards, she realized that she's fallen for an ideal of Hurricane in the beginning, and that obsession had carried her through all later relationships. "I'm an idiot."

"I wouldn't say that, exactly," Lightning said. "But you really need to learn to love yourself."

It was incredible. Lightning's attention seemed to be focused entirely on Fiddle. "Aren't ya mad at me for letting you fall over and over again?"

Lightning grimaced. "I mean, I'm not happy about it. Also, the whole picking me up when I have nothing left is like, super creepy. But,I still made all those decisions that got me where I was. It'd have been nice if I had someone there to call me an idiot, but that's not your job. I'm mare enough to own my highs and my lows, and I'm more than just your charity case."

"You're right." Fiddle sighed. "I've been a darn fool, and I still love ya more than anything."

"Yeah, that's a problem." Lightning stood up and trotted over to her, patting her lightly on the head. "I think you might wanna take this century or whatever to learn to love yourself," she said. "And I guess I'll spend the rest of my life trying to figure out how to make it so that I'm not as much of an asshole next time. Maybe I'll actually go say sorry to the Elements for trying to kill them."

As she made her way towards the door, Fiddle called out in desperation. "Wait, you're just gonna leave me for the rest of yer life?"

Lightning smiled, and there was a calm serenity in her eyes that had never been there before. "Nah, I still wanna be friends. But I've got a lot to think about, and I think you do too. I'll come back tomorrow and we'll talk more, okay?"

Fiddle nodded, too overwhelmed to speak.

"Alright, see ya later then." With a final wave, Lightning made her way out of Fiddle's house, leaving Fiddle to reflect on all the lives she had lived.

She wasn't going to marry Lighting this time. Fiddle finally understood that, and yet, as much as that knowledge hurt, she knew it was for the best. She needed this lifetime to work on herself, and maybe, without the fear of romantic rejection, she and Lightning could help each other become the ponies they were meant to be.

Fiddle smiled. Fate had no idea what was about to hit her.

"Ah, Cookie, it is good to see you again. You look good."

"Same to you," Smart Cookie replied. "Figured out how much longer you and me and Pansy've got left after the Harmony magic knocked us on our rumps?"

Clover the Clever shrugged. "If my theories are correct, we will live so long as there is harmony in Equestria. Hopefully, that means we will be as immortal as the alicorns. So, what brings you here today?"

"It's Hurricane," Cookie said somberly. "She... Fate finally got her, and I wanted to know if you could, ah, do anythin' about it."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Clover said. "For all our differences, I still respected her. Unfortunately, I cannot bring back the dead, but..." She trailed off, her gaze becoming distant. "Somepony like Hurricane won't pass easily into the next world. From winter's grasp, she will be reborn as a child of summer, and I may be able to help you find her when her soul returns to this world."

"You can do that?" Cookie asked, her voice filled with hope.

Clover nodded. "With how important she is to history, I have no doubts that Fate will demand she play her part over and over again, and I can use that to create an artifact to track her. With it, you can save her from falling the next time."

"I see." Cookie paused for a moment. "And our love?"

"She won't have her memories, but if your love was strong enough, that should repeat as well." Clover smiled. "You simply must have faith in the strength of your bond, old friend. Now, shall I begin?"

Cookie nodded, knowing what had to be done to ensure their love. "Thank ya kindly, Clover."

Let's start at the end, becoming strangers once again.

"Exile." Hurricane spat the word with all the venom she could muster. "After all I've done for them, this is how my people repay me." She took another swig from her mug. "Ungrateful whelps. I brought them summer and these children throw me out for it."

It hurt to see the once-mighty ruler reduced to this. Smart Cookie had taken a week to make it to the Isle of El Baa after finding out about the forced abdication, and it seemed as if Hurricane had spent the entire time deep in her cups.

"Even my army has deserted me," she muttered. "Should never have agreed to the dumb unification. Now I don't have anything or anyone left." With her trademark quicksilver temper already fading, there was nothing left for Hurricane but to sag down deeper into her seat, completely oblivious to the mare approaching her.

"You have me," Cookie said softly.

In her drunken stupor, it took Hurricane a few seconds of squinting before she recognized the newcomer, at which point her eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Cookie," she said slowly, slurring out the name. "What're you doing here? Did those cowards back in Everfree send you to finish the job?"

Smart Cookie shook her head. "I told ya ages ago that I'd stick with ya until the end, and I meant it."

Hurricane chuckled bitterly. "You were always a stubborn one. Wouldn't even let Time herself claim you."

"I also ain't one to give up on a pony I love." Once again, Cookie prepared for rejection to tear her heart apart, but she couldn't help but make the declaration again. Even in her despondent state, Hurricane was still the most beautiful mare she'd ever seen, and she could still see the passion that burned bright beneath her depressed stupor.

"You've still got it bad for me, huh?" Hurricane set her mug down before staring at Cookie with unfocused eyes. "Well, I guess you're almost easy on the eyes, and I don't have any other options anymore, what with those fools taking away everything I had for no good reason." She shrugged. "Sure, why not? Let's see if you're any good at kissing."

"I... do you really mean it?" Cookie's heart was pounding in anticipation, and she could hardly breathe in her excitement.

Another shrug. "You're the only pony who gets that I should still be Commander, so yeah, I guess I'll take it."

Cookie didn't need any more prompting. She nearly leapt forward in her haste to finally fulfill her dreams, and lost herself in the kiss as she finally felt herself become whole for the first time in her life.

Fiddlesticks found her sitting at a bar, as usual. This time she was a green pegasus with a yellow-and-orange mane, downing a glass of wine as she slouched into her seat.

"Howdy," Fiddlesticks said, pulling herself up onto the stool beside her. "A pretty mare like you shouldn't be drinking alone."

The mare snorted. "Yeah, well, tell that to all the people I've scared away."

"Well, I don't scare easy." Fiddle waved at the bartender. "I'll have whatever she's having."

That got her new companion to raise an eyebrow. "You sure about that? You don't even know what I'm having."

"Eh, can't be that bad if you're gulping it down like water." Fiddle reached out a hoof. "I'm Fiddlesticks, by the way."

"Lightning Dust." In a single, smooth motion, Lightning downed the rest of her drink. "Hate to disappoint you if you're looking for a quick lay, but I'm not really interested in being with anyone right now."

Without even batting an eye at that, Fiddle smirked. "Don't worry, I like going slowly, darlin'."

Lightning Dust rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Just don't blame me if you go home alone tonight."

Patience was a virtue that Fiddlesticks had cultivated over a very, very long time, so she simply smiled as the bartender set down her drink. "As long as I can help a pony get something off her chest, don't matter none where I end up after this. You seem like you could use an ear to listen to your sorrows."

With a sigh, Lightning motioned for the bartender to bring her another drink before she continued.. "I lost everything, twice," she said simply, her voice almost eerily devoid of emotion. "Kicked out of the Wonderbolts Academy, and then my stunt team got shut down. Every time I tried to reach for something, it just..." She shook her head. "Why do I bother trying anymore?"

"You sound like one extraordinary mare," Fiddle said, patting her gently on the back. "Gettin' into the Academy ain't easy, and then founding yer own stunt team? You sound like a pony worth hanging out with."

"It all turns to shit anyways, so who cares?"

"I do," Fiddle said. "Even if we fail, what's important is that we tried." It was a line she'd used many times before, and one she hoped to believe in one day. For now, she hoped it would ignite some of the fire back into Lightning's soul.

Unfortunately, the pegasus mare just sank deeper into her seat. "Sure, whatever." She stared at Fiddle. "You can go now, if you want. Don't need me harshing your vibe."

Fiddle shook her head. "Naw, I still got a drink to finish." Maybe things would be different by the time she finished it, maybe it wouldn't, but either way, she'd taken the first step, and all that was left was to let Destiny play out as it always did.

You won't even notice that I'm gone

Fiddledust found her in a bar.

It wasn't an uncommon place for their first meetings, but usually she was nursing a glass of wine and not a bandaged foreleg. "You look like you could use a drink," Fiddle offered, taking a seat next to her.

"Bartender's already got me covered," the orange-haired pegasus replied. "Least he could do after the bouncer got her ass handed to her." She winced as she prodded at her injuries.

"You get into a lot of fights, then?" Fiddle asked as she waved the bartender over to place her own order.

"Only when someone's picking a fight with one of my friends," the other mare replied. "Name's Blitz Roller."

"Fiddledust." They shared a smile, and Fiddle felt the familiar sense of connection between them once again. "You remind me of one of my friends. Real firecracker of a mare. Never backed down from a fight either, even if she didn't have a chance in Tartarus of winning."

"Sounds like a hoot," Blitz said. "She here too?"

"She passed away a while ago," Fiddle said quietly.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Blitz shifted awkwardly on her seat.

"Don't you worry about it. Happened a long time ago." Fiddle shook her head. "And I know she wouldn't want me to be hung up over it. That's why I'm here for a good time."

"Well, it's definitely exciting around here," Blitz said. "Me and some of my friends are gonna go do some clubbing after this. You want in?"

For a moment, Fiddle hesitated. She still had a chance to disappear, to be just another odd encounter in Blitz's life until Fate inevitably played out its course. Though, this version of her lover seemed much more well-adjusted— a lifetime as Lightning Dust had done her good, she supposed.

And if not, well, Fiddle had made a promise, and even if it cost her a chance at love, she would fulfill it. She would save this mare, and trust in the strength of their bond to bring them together anyways.

And so, with a heart as light as a feather, Fiddle smiled. "I'd love that, darlin'."