Mark Invents Microsoft Edge

by Faedelaide

Rating: teen
Tags: Profanity, Violence, Dark, Death, Nightmare Moon, Romance, Princess Luna, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy
Length: 1035

Shadowmark Crimsonmoon starts up a tech company, marries Nightmare Moon, and kills Rainbow Dash.

Shadowmark Crimsonmoon starts up a tech company, marries Nightmare Moon, and kills Rainbow Dash.

el em ay oh ecks dee!

Something I made with my friend unprompted and in like 30 minutes. don't expect it to be good

Published 2022-07-26 00:10:00 UTC
Last updated 2022-07-26 00:10:00 UTC

chapter fourth: like the holiday July 4th

Shadowmark Crimsonmoon and Nightmare Moon (two moons woah) were making out on the beach. they weren't wearing anything cuz horses dont wear clothes ever. ignore that Mark has a sweater on in the cover he just put it on to look fancy for his photoshoot. (I totally drew the cover btw don't steal)

there were fireworks in the sky that were perfectly times to their smoochin. Rainbow Dash was also on the beach watching fireworks. she then said "watch this Shadowmark Crimsonmoon my love." and flew at the fireworks for some cool dodges and rolls. what rainbow dash didnt know was the fireworks were hot. and they burned. and she died. lao.

Shadowmark Crimsonmoon was unimpressed. he walked up to rainbow dash (who is dead btw) and said. "do better next time, you'll get em next time champ." and every fish in the ocean clapped for him because he was so cool.

Nightmare moon got up and said I'm tired. so Shadowmark Crimsonmoon tossed her into deep space. she's gone now.

Also Applejack died of cardio a rest. the apples ate her. she tasted like apples. yummy.

chapter five: doom

Shadowmark Crimsonmoon was very upset that day. he said "aw frick" and threw his one and only son out of the fourteenth story window. why was he mad? i dunno ask him. but also there was other ponies and they were building apple. oh no. Since applejack was dead of a heart attack, the apple was no longer trademarked, and a bunch of ponies including rainbow dash (whos still dead) maked apple to trademark apples and throw them at Shadowmark Crimsonmoon cuz theyre evil.

Nightmare Moon, whos not on the moon anymore went over to apple industries to buy apples. she bought all of them and rainbow dash was like "oh no, my apples" and then they all died of heart attacks (except for Nightmare Moon and Shadowmark Crimsonmoon).

Shadowmark Crimsonmoon was like "good job sweaty" and then they made out and the apples looked on in horror cuz theyre apples. Then all the apples had heart attacks cuz they ate applejack and applejack has heart attack disease. oh no.

Mark was like "oh no" and Nightmare Mon was like "ok" and then they made out some more. but the apples still died.

chapper 6: we're british now

Shadowmark Crimsonmoon went to pony britian with nightmare Moon cuz he was like "i want the brits to have microsofts as well." so he picked up the microsoft building cuz he's very strong and handsome and you're wrong if you think otherwise cuz he's so hot he set his son on fire.

he then put the building in a photocopier from his office in the building and copied the building. there were now two building but also twice as many ponies. so he klilled the extras and gave their bodies to the originals and said "eat up". thank you Mark. Bone smack the teeth.

So mark flew (cuz he has wings cuz he's the most powerful alicorn ever. he killed princess luna so nightmare moon wouldnt get jealous) to britin and the british ponys were like "oi this chap's spiffin. oi love me microsoft it gits me outta louver innit." and mark was like "i hate thick accents" and then put them all in the photocopier so he could use them when he played super mario sticker star on his nintendo 3DS XL.

but then mark was like " I wanna be mr tendo." so he balled his fingers, and cursed at the brits one last time before leaving with a fart.

chapter 7: tendies

Shadowmark Crimsonmoon went back down to hell to talk to Mr tendo so that he could buy nintendo. Mr tendo was all like "I'm satan rarararargh you can't buy me i am money.oooooooooh (he's like a ghost)"

and Shadowmark Crimsonmoon was not very happy. He walked up to santa and said "gimme tendies or you die."

the giant chicken tendy didnt move so mark blasted him with his awesome blood powers.

All the demons clapped cuz he killed satan and was now the new satan. Nightmare Moon flobbered up to him, and he said "You are wife now" and she was like "k" and bought a nw dress. and then they made out and it was super cool.

then Bloodedge griffon came in and was like "yo. Your cool. wanna hang out and do weed?" and mark was like "sure dude I have weeded so many times." and then they hugged and then everyone died.

The end. lmao.

chapter thee:

Shadowmark Crimsonmoon is so happy that nightmare moon kiseed him on the mouth and now he owns microsoft.

He then calls everypony in equstri to his house over for tea. he says when theyre all there. "i am mr microsoft. I'm very cool. if you work at microsoft i'll give you a big kiss but not on the mouth tho no homo." and all the ponies clapped for him. he was so cool. Shadowmark Crimsonmoon then took all the ponies including nightmare moon (his girlfriend) on a hike to microsoft HQ. when everyone was inside except for Nightmare moon he closed the door on them. and they were like "whats the dealio broski i just wanted to take a hike."

Shadowmark Crimsonmoon then said "now you work for me forever. I am microsoft and I will pay you minimum wage." the ponies all cheered. wow. i hate the economy. I don't hate Mark tho. He's the best and the coolest and if you disagree then you're stupid and dumb.

gotem.

Chapter 1: Weiner

Shadowmark Crimsonmoon moves to Ponyville from hell.

chapter 2: doom

Shadowmark Crimsonmoon walkt up to microsoft headquarters (Copyrighted name). he walks up to mr microsoft pony and asks "hey i want job to mkae microsoft edgy."

microsoft pony immediately steps down as microsoft pony and Shadowmark Crimsonmoon becomes CEO and is microhard.

microsoft pony then dies of a heart attc. Lol.

then Shadowmark Crimsonmoon walks outside its daytime and see nightmare moon (so hot). I wonder if they're gonna make out.

and they do.

lol.