I'd Throw Her Off a Cliff, No Problem
1: Just Wanted to Say I Love You
"I just think if you really loved her, you'd take better care of her."
"What?" Holiday said.
"I don't mean that you don't love her. Maybe." Budget Fuss snorted. "I just mean...do you know how much trouble she gets into? Some of it seems dangerous. Maybe you should keep a tighter rein on her, watch her a bit more closely? That's all I mean."
Holiday looked deceptively calm and gentle. "Could you be more specific?"
"Well...do you know she and two of her friends built a giant slingshot, and launched her up into the air so high she landed in Cloudsdale? That can't be safe."
Holiday smiled. "I'm glad they at least had good aim."
"It's not a joke. She can't even fly! It's crazy to fling somepony up into the air like that who can't even fly. She really could have died!"
Holiday sighed. "I suppose an earth pony like you wouldn't understand."
"What do you mean, an earth pony like me? What kind of pony do you think YOU are, an alicorn?"
Lofty walked up to the arguing pair. "Holiday is right. I know you don't think much of Scootaloo as a flyer, because it's very hard for her to fly UP. The highest I've ever seen her fly directly upwards was...a few ponylengths above the height of a one story house. Of course, flying UP isn't what a pony needs to get DOWN safe. A controlled glide is enough, if you're on your way down."
Lofty cleared her throat. "But what's more important, Scootaloo has a VERY good feel for the air. If the weather wasn't safe for slingshotting her to Cloudsdale, she would know it.
"And airfeel isn't just about slingshots, either. I would feel perfectly fine throwing her off a cliff, even if her wings were tired, because I know she would find the right breezes and updrafts to ride the air down gently."
"How can you say such a thing? Throwing your own daughter off a cliff. Oh, wait, I forgot, she isn't really your daughter."
"Because I'm a pegasus, and I'm somepony who knows Scootaloo very, very well. And you aren't either of those things."
Budget Fuss said, "I'm going to tell Mayor Mare what you said. And I'm sure if you won't watch Scootaloo properly, somepony will keep a proper eye on YOU." She stomped away in a huff, slamming the bakery door behind her.
When Budget Fuss was gone, Scootaloo's voice whispered from behind the counter, "Is she gone?"
Pinkie said, "And that's how you put the filling in a fruit-filled cruller." Her nose poked up from behind the counter. "She's gone. If you mean that pony who just left."
Scootaloo trotted out into the customer area. She leaped up into Holiday's lap, her wings giving her a little power assist. "Is what you said really true? Would you REALLY throw me off the top of a cliff?"
"Sure!" Lofty roughed up Scootaloo's mane with one forehoof. "If I throw you hard enough to make sure you get a good start, you'd be safe enough. Of course, I'd prefer to throw you on a day with good flying weather. But I didn't try to explain the details to Budget Fuss. I don't think she would ever understand."
Holiday chuckled. "I believe your Auntie Lofty is right. I might even be willing to throw you off the top of a high cliff myself, if you say it's safe."
"Wow!" Scootaloo said. "You really are the best aunts ever. And I love you too. You two too."
"Awww!" Pinkie said, watching the three ponies hug. "How cute!"
2: Do You Believe Me?
Mayor Mare came to visit the little family (or maybe, she thought, just a half-family, assembled from mismatched scraps?) at home.
The three mares sat in the living room, drinking coffee. Mare said, "I've been hearing some...concerns. About how you two have been caring for Scootaloo."
"I think we've been doing fine."
"Specifically, about how you threatened to throw her off a cliff even though she can't fly."
Lofty said, "Oh. That."
Holiday added, "I wouldn't call it a THREAT, exactly."
Mare stared in disbelief.
Holiday said, "More like a promise."
Mare was speechless.
Lofty wheedled, "How about we talk about this later? We can even prepare a nice PonyPoint for you. Bureaucrats like PonyPoints, right?"
Mare sighed. She turned around and walked out of the house. As she walked down the street, she thought about what kinds of forms she ought to fill out, to try to get something done. To assure the little filly's safety.
***
Early the next morning, Mayor Mare heard something knocking against her bedroom window. Was it a tree branch, blown by the wind?
Mare got out of bed, and went to the window.
Outside, a gray pegasus mare hovered. One of her eyes looked directly at the Mayor.
Mare opened the window.
"Here!" the pegasus said, dropping an envelope upon Mare's forehooves. "It's a very special event, and everypony in town is invited!"
Mare opened the envelope as the pegasus flew away.
Where: The bottom of Megalith Cliff
When: This morning, as soon as you can get there
Who: Invite as many ponies as you like. The more witnesses, the better!
Mare sighed. "Ponyville is crazy. And pegasi are even crazier."
3: Daredevil
A crowd of ponies gathered, near the bottom of a tall cliff. They sat or stood, or stood up and sat down and stood up again, staring upwards. In tall trees, or flying large, lazy circles above the crowd, pegasi watched and waited.
Mayor Mare looked up at the trees, and shouted. "Rainbow Dash, are you ready to catch Scootaloo if she falls?"
"Yeah, sure. Not like she'll need my help, but if she does, I'm ready."
"Fluttershy?"
"I'm not any good at this, but I'm watching just in case."
"Flitter?"
"Yeah, I'm good. Anypony wanna go clubbing with me later, after the show?"
Mare said, "I suppose that's enough pegasi. Scootaloo, Lofty, and Holiday...are you ready? Remember, you can call this off at any time."
A foalish voice echoed faintly through the air from the clifftop. Mare wasn't sure what the voice said.
A moment later, two mares atop the cliff grabbed Scootaloo by two limbs each. They swung her backwards, away from the cliff's edge. Then forward. Then back again.
Because the clifftop was so high above the spectators, the two mares' voices only reached the watchers with a delay. "A one! A two! And a three!"
The orange pegasus filly was already flung off the cliff's edge. Scootaloo folded her wings against her body, and plummeted.
"Scootaloo!" Rainbow shouted. "Show them you can fly! Don't scare everypony!"
Fluttershy squeaked wordlessly.
Flitter was busy flirting with a tree, or maybe a lamppost. "Hey baby, you could light up my life." She batted her eyelashes at a pegasus pony sitting in the tree.
Scootaloo barely started to unfold the tips of her wings. She shouted, "Watch my airbrake, suckers!" Even as gravity pulled the plummeting filly downwards, Scootaloo stopped accelerating. She unfolded her wings a little more, and fell only very very fast, instead of terrifyingly very very very fast.
Scootaloo's wings flared, one a little more than the other. She veered left, directly towards an enormous rock far below.
"No!" Fluttershy said. "Watch out for the rocks!" She flapped her wings, rising into the air.
"The sun warmed that huge rock really well this morning!" Scootaloo shouted. "Updraft opportunity!"
She sank towards the largest, house-sized rock, but slower and slower. Finally she hovered directly above it, her wings slowly flapping. "Who thinks my aunts don't really love me? Who says they're bad parents, huh? Come over here and I'll drop eggs on you!"
"Bawk bawk bawk!" a colt shouted. Scootaloo threw an egg, which broke and splattered right next to him.
"No fair! Don't kill your own kind!" the same colt said.
Scootaloo threw a second egg, and the pony ran.
Scootaloo kept hovering. "I can do this all day, suckers! Who wants some more eggs, huh? Huh?"
Scootaloo tossed two more eggs. Many of the onlookers fled.
Most of the remaining ponies, like Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle, came closer to share their congratulations.
***
Rainbow hovered next to Scootaloo. "Ok, I believe you. Ok? Not like I ever doubted you to start with."
"That's true," Scootaloo agreed. "You said I could do this, just like Lofty and Holiday did."
"So let's go home," Rainbow said. "Or we could all go somewhere together for lunch. Come on, Scootaloo, let's go back to Ponyville."
Scootaloo didn't move. She just hovered in exactly the same spot.
Rainbow insisted, "I believe you! I'm sure you can stay in the air forever. So why don't you come along?"
Scootaloo blushed. "If I don't stay right above this exact part of the rock, the updraft isn't quite good enough and I'll just glide down to the ground."
"Ok, Scoots. So climb on my back. After that flying feat you just did, you deserve to celebrate."
Scootaloo sighed. She buzzed her wings very, very hard to gain a little altitude, and glided down to land on Rainbow's back.
"Ok," she said. "Let's go."
