What Almost Was

by unknownmercury

Rating: teen
Tags: Main 6, Discord, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Alternate Universe, Sad, Nightmare Moon, Tragedy
Length: 5226

What if things had gone a little differently?

Warning: Story contains themes of murder, mild and suggested torture, and moderate blood shed. Read at your own risk.

On the night that Nightmare Moon staged her coup, Celestia failed to banish her. This is the aftermath.

Published 2012-09-19 09:14:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-09-19 09:14:01 UTC

What Almost Was

"Poor, pathetic Princess Luna. Do you really think that saving Equestria is a good thing? Don't you realize that all you're doing is protecting a land that doesn't care about you?" the Draconeques drawled, watching the black Alicorn.

Princess Luna glared at Discord, wishing him to shut up. He had sent her a message, asking her to meet him on neutral ground, without her sister. She was now starting to regret the fact that she had agreed to do so. "Silence yourself, wretch! My sister and I are Equestria's rulers, and none shall harm--"

"Yes, yes, but honestly. Do you really think they love you? You poor soul. They sleep at night, Luna. They sleep and ignore the night time. While your sister rules the day, when everyone is awake, having fun. And have you noticed that there's no sort of moon festival in this pathetic place? I have." He grinned, watching her smugly.

Luna frowned, doubt showing in her eyes for the first time since she'd been dubbed the ruler of the Moon. In that one moment of doubt, Discord struck. "Side with me, Luna. Together, we can destroy your sister and rule Equestria. But only together."

"I do not wish to destroy my sister..."

"Necessary sacrifice. If you don't do this one thing, then you'll be stuck in the night forever."

Luna nodded, unaware of the magic slowly working its way through her. A subtle bit of Discord's power, working its way into her to be noticed at a later date.

In the end, she hadn't destroyed her sister. But as they were turning Discord to stone with the newfound Elements of Harmony, the beast had just smiled and said, "Soon."

It wasn't long after that that the piece of Discord's corruption had made its self known to Luna. She had begun working in private to make herself more powerful than her sister. And finally, when the time was right, she'd struck.

The Summer Sun Celebration had always been a big day for the Princesses. They both had to look their best and be on time to whatever town the festival was being held. On this particular day, Luna used her magic to transform herself to look more like her sister. That in its self wasn't odd.

What was odd was the intimidating aura she gave off, to which passing guard ponies would shudder. Even as they flew to Ponyville, living creatures within a hundred yards would scatter off to the side.

When they had landed in the town and the celebration had started, Luna launched her coup.

"And now," Celestia had said, "I will raise the sun and we can rejoice in the longest day of the year."

Luna had waited patiently as her sister attempted to bring the sun up. Celestia had smiled at her and said, "Dear sister, I believe you have forgotten to lower your aspect. I cannot bring the sun to bear if the moon is in the way. If you would kindly lower it?"

"No." One word, one syllable, an even tone. It was enough to make ponies start murmuring.

"Excuse me?" Celestia was staring at her sister, unsure of what was happening, though she had a sneaking suspicion.

"I said no, sister. I will not be forgotten anymore. From this night on, I will rule! From this night on, there will be no day! From this night on, I am not your sister! I am Nightmare Moon! Bow before me, or be punished!"

"I think not. I know not who you are, or how you came to possess my sister, but I will not bow to you. Release my Luna or face my wrath."

"Do your worst!" Luna- Nightmare Moon- had stood, horn glowing, ready to attack her sister. Celestia, to her credit, didn't even bat an eye. Instead, she simply brought her own magic to bear, and with a simple spell summoned the most powerful weapons at her disposal.

The Elements of Harmony floated around the solar princess as she stared down the cruel parody of her sister's form. "Yield, Luna, and I won't have to use these."

"Fool! You think that those can defeat me? I helped you use them the last time! They are as bound to me as they are to you!"

"Are they really now? Laughter, Loyalty, and Generosity. Those were the ones you embodied. But no longer do you carry these traits. Let us test it then. You like the night and the moon so much? Then to the moon you shall go!" The Elements of Harmony activated, their prismatic blast engulfing the being who called herself Nightmare Moon. Celestia felt a grim satisfaction as they did her bidding, banishing the dark Alicorn.

When the dust cleared, everypony let out a small gasp of shock. Standing there, completely unscathed, was the shadowy pony, her wings spread wide, her horn glowing a dark, evil purple. Nightmare Moon let out a loud cackle. "Fool! Nothing can stop me." She fired a blast of the Solar Princess, who narrowly dodged it.

"But, how?! The Elements--"

"Are attuned to me, as i said before. And just to be sure that you don't think to try it again..." She let out another blast of energy which hit and shattered the purple crystal that represented the Element of Magic. Celestia screamed as if she had been physically harmed. The Nightmare Alicorn cackled again, stepping forward. "No more Elements, Tia. Just you and me, to rule the world. Let's see who is stronger."

"I will not fight you, Luna." Celestia glared at the being that had been her sister. The black armored pony smirked, horn glowing.

"Then you will die." She fired a quick spell. The grass around Celestia's hooves grew rapidly, ensnaring her. The princess of the sun countered with her own spell to burn the grass, but it was already too late. As soon as her attention was diverted, Nightmare Moon had fired a second spell, her purple aura surrounding Celestia.

With a scream of anguish, Celestia felt her horn and wings being painfully ripped away. No blood flowed from the wounds, and in fact, there were no marks left where the limbs had been. For all intents and purposes, Celestia was an Earth Pony now. Her legs shortened, and her mane and tail turned to normal, non-flowing pink hair.

Nightmare Moon grinned down at her. "Night Guard, seize this dissident of my rule!" Two dark blue, bat-winged Pegasi stepped forward, chaining Celestia's legs together. "Take her to the palace. I will have my fun with her later." She grinned. "Is there another who will challenge me?" She looked out over the astonished faces of the crowd. Everypony was silent, staring in horror.

"As I thought. From now on, I rule! The night will last... Forever!" She laughed maniacally, sending many a pony to their knees.

Slowly a chant began to rise up through the crowd. "Hail Nightmare Moon. Hail the Lunar Princess."

And this was only the beginning, she thought to herself.

When Nightmare Moon returned to the palace, a pleasant sight awaited her. Celestia was chained to the wall in the throne room, her eyes closed, her body sagging. The previous sun goddess had already given up, her spirit broken as easily as the Element of Magic. And now, the Nightmare Alicorn was going to have the distinct pleasure of breaking her body as well.

She had chosen the throne room in order to make an example of her sister. Her blood would stain the walls, her screams echo the corridors. Only after she had been thoroughly brutalized would she be put into a dungeon cell. Nightmare Moon hadn't taken away her immortality, just her magic and flight. Celestia would be forced to watch as the world changed to the Nightmare's bidding.

Nightmare Moon levitated a tray of cruel, sharp instruments over to her. There was a bottle of pale blue fluid, and this she force fed to her captive. Celestia's eyes snapped open as she swallowed the liquid, and as it was pulled away, she coughed and spluttered, asking, "What did you just make me drink?"

"It is a magical potion I brewed in preparation for this. Normally, a pony can endure only so much pain before she passes out. That potion will keep you awake for the duration of this." She grinned a bit as horror crossed Tia's face.

"No, please, you don't want to do this!" The solar princess sounded so... pathetic. Nightmare Moon laughed a bit.

"Oh, but I do. You see, you are my first example, the one everypony will remember if they try to defy me."

As Celestia started babbling, the Nightmare magically lifted a pair of wickedly sharp scissors. "I suppose this will have to be the first thing I do. You are already starting to annoy me, so I'll get this out of the way." She forced Tia's mouth open, pulling her tongue out.

As the scissors came nearer, the white pony let out a scream.

Several hours later, Celestia's blood was thoroughly coated on the wall and the former ruler had been escorted to the dungeons. Nightmare Moon took pleasure in the fact that Tia was still capable of regenerating any damaged tissue; she would be ready for another session in a little over a month. For now, however, the black Alicorn had a new regime to force upon the world. Her Night Guard had already flown to every major city in Equestria, spreading the news of her takeover.

The first thing to be changed was the pony classifications. Before, there had been three major pony types. With her changes, there were now four, and the Pegasi had two subcultures. There were the feather brains (she swore she would think of a less silly name in time) and the Night Guard, the bat- and dragon-winged Pegasi that she had originally created. In time, the guards she had would have foals. Any foals born of a union between Night Guard and feather dusters (it was a work in progress) would have a fifty-fifty chance either way. If there were unicorn or earth pony blood in either of the family lines, the Night Guard blood would repress it so that Pegasus blood took dominance.

And the fourth classification was, of course, the Alicorn. Tia had been quite foolish to leave their own kind out of the system simply because a Draconequus had destroyed most of them. Ponies wouldn't recognize power in something that wasn't classified. These classifications took a few months to circulate widely, but everypony agreed to them. Not that they really had a choice.

Another thing that changed was the cycle of months and seasons. Since Nightmare Moon had no power, nor even a desire, to raise the sun, something had to change. Nightmare Moon found the solution in the phases of her aspect, as well as a bit of math. Since there were twelve lunar months, but only eight lunar phases, she would remove the middle month of each season, and rename the months to reduce confusion.

The moon was empty for the first half of winter, which she'd named Frost Peak. It entered the waxing crescent stage during Snow Ground. It's so called first quarter occurred during Snow Melt, and it's waxing gibbous stage lasted for Earth Warming. It would be full in the first half of summer, the month she'd dubbed Fire Peak. The second half of summer,Harvest Month, it would be what was referred to as waning gibbous. For the first half of autumn, simply named Leaf Fall, it would be in it's 'third quarter' where it seemed half full, mirrored to Snow Melt's first quarter. The second half of Autumn, dubbed Cool Wind, was it's waning crescent, and then the cycle repeated its self.

In those first months, she changed the world, adapting it to survive off of her moonlight. She wanted to rule over the world, not destroy it with lack of sunlight. The amount of power it took to convert all of the plants and animals, though, left her indisposed for half a year, during which her Night Guard quashed three attempted uprisings.

Some ponies were just so ungrateful.

And then, during the third year of her reign, in the coldest part of Frost Peak, when only the Wendigos thrived, someone came to visit her. Opening the throne room door to the persistent knock, the Nightmare was quite surprised, to say the least, to see Discord standing there, that cocky smirk adorning his face.

"Well hello, Luna," he said, raising his lion's paw in greeting. "How are you this fine.... night?"

"You will address me by my proper title of Lunar Queen, or at the very least by Nightmare Moon. Luna I am no longer." She glared at him, shaking her head. "I was not aware that you were free."

"Oh, yeah! Funny thing, when you break one of the Elements. It apparently undoes whatever effects they've had on creatures. I've been free for... three years, if I have your calender correct."

"Two and a half, if you were freed on the same night I took over. Where have you been all this time?"

"Decided to see what chaos you were causing. Apparently, not a whole lot. Everyone seems... complacent. Worse than when Tia was in the big gold throne. Though I did see a lovely mob in Trottingham not long ago. A bunch of Earth Ponies attacking some Unicorns and Pegasi."

Nightmare Moon scowled. "A slave rebellion. Shadow Bolts!" She stomped, summoning the five evil fliers to her.

Discord brought his paw down, crushing with a loud snapping sound. "Now, don't be hasty. It's not any fun to just stop them."

Nightmare Moon frowned, staring at the chimeric creature before her. "Go on."

"Let them think they have a chance. Get someone to gather info and relay it back. When the time is right, instead of sending some measly Night Guards..."

"Go and stop them myself..." She stared at him in horrified admiration. She had never thought of anything like this. A new way to strike fear - and obedience - into the hearts of her subjects.

"Exactly. If your public sees that you personally appear to stop these things, they'll be less likely to do it."

"But why let them think they have a chance?"

"Because it's so much more upsetting if you're stopped dead while you're winning. They start overpowering the Unicorns and the Pegasi, start getting their town back, and you swoop in, put a stop to it, make an example of the leaders..."

"You are cruel, demented, and twisted... You're also a genius."

"Oh, well not to toot my own horn, but..." Discord grinned, inspecting the eagle's claw he had in place of a front left hoof.

After three days of status reports from the feuding town, she swooped in to stop the rebellion. Four Earth Ponies had led the uprising, and those were nailed, impaled, and wrapped with barbed wire onto large, wooden X-shaped frames, left to die of exposure, blood loss, hunger, and dehydration.

Nightmare Moon was quite happy to find that rebellions became less likely to happen. When they did, she would do the same method, though with different ways of making examples of the rebel leaders. In time, the Unicorns started revering her as a goddess, more so than anyone had her sister. The Pegasi were happy to serve her, and she had a list of applicants to join the Night Guard. The Earth Ponies, their wills broken, served obediently. The few non-slave Earth Ponies were sent to the worst parts of the land to farm and fend for themselves in a place that was hostile towards life in general.

All in all, being the ruler of the world wasn't so bad. It did get tiresome, though, having to constantly worry about the problems in her immediate area. If there was a dispute between two unicorns or pegasi, she was the one who made the final decision. She couldn't just tell them to settle it themselves because that led to violence between her loyal subjects, and that eventually led to her losing a whole city because all of the residents were killing each other off.

With so many Night Guards, she could afford to make them the major police force in every major city, but even they couldn't stop all crime. Theft, vandalism, murder... The list was miles long. Discord convinced her that crime was a necessary thing. "No peace without disharmony, my dear Nightmare. No dark without light." He gave her a smug look as he said, "No night without day."

She had sent him to Tartarus. He was back the next rotation of the moon, sure, but he was a lot more wary of what he said to her.

And then, there was the problem of the five Elements of Harmony that she hadn't destroyed. She really couldn't decide what to do with them. Destroying them seemed like a waste of powerful magic, but she didn't want to try converting them to her will and risk making them whole again. They had a will of their own and if she tried breaking that will, she risked them turning on her.

And Discord, the crazy genius, suggested altering them without breaking their will. Instead, she should use her magic to turn their will to hers, and they would become the Elements of Chaos.

This was a splendid idea, and she spent the next five years on this project, until eventually they were no longer their old selves. Kindness was Cruelty, Laughter was Anger, Honesty was Deception, Loyalty was Betrayal, and Generosity was Greed. They were still powerful artifacts, but now they sewed only evil. She tested them on her sister during one of their monthly sessions in the dungeons.

The light they gave off was darker in color, and they cast eerie shadows instead of banishing all darkness. They surrounded the white captive, and when the lights faded, Celestia had been changed again. Her skin sagged on a thin frame, her coat and mane were dirty and matted. Her eyes were sunken, and she stared into the distance, muttering indecipherable words.

In short, the Nightmare Alicorn had finally done what she had intended to so many years ago. Her sister was now completely broken, mind, spirit, and body. Seeing no more use for her like this, the Lunar Queen sent her to one of the labor farms in Equestria.

Rotation by rotation, a thousand years passed. Nightmare Moon and Discord reigned supreme. They had recently quashed a threat to their domain that came in the form of Changelings. The Changeling Queen, Chrysalis had approached them with a proposition to rule together. When she was denied, her army had tried to invade Equestria, attempting to feed off of the love around them to keep power. Unfortunately, love was a thing of the past, and the Night Guard had dealt with the Changelings.

Chrysalis was sent to the sun, where she would live and burn forever.

Shortly after that, six ponies had showed up in her throne room. The purple unicorn, apparently the leader of the group, was shouting something about how this wasn't supposed to be. The six were captured and imprisoned. Nightmare Moon paid them each a visit.

"Your name, please. And be truthful, it will be so much easier for you."

"T-Twilight Sparkle, protégé of Princess Celestia."

"And that is a lie. I believe you are Twilight Sparkle, but Celestia is in no position to have a student, not for a thousand years. Tell me, Twilight Sparkle, what are you here for?"

"To put an end to your evil."

"My evil? My EVIL?! Do you realize that in the last thousand years, I have eradicated the griffins, sent the dragons into hiding, and altered the world in such a way that pegasi do not control the weather? I have unified the world, and it is in peace!"

"It's still evil."

"Very well. I'll humor you. And how, exactly, did you tend to stop me?"

"I refuse to answer that."

"Oh, my dear, you'll answer it.... in time. For now, I have five other ponies to speak with." Nightmare Moon left the anti-magic room the unicorn was trapped in.

"State your name."

"Applejack. AJ to my friends, but you ain't my friend so..."

"Very well, Applejack. Where did you escape from?"

"Ah didn't escape from nowhere."

"Ah, one of the wilderness ponies then."

"No, Ah'm from Ponyville."

"Then you escaped your master?"

"Ah don't serve nopony."

Nightmare Moon tilted her head. There was certainly something very odd about this bunch. "I know you're not lying--"

"Ah don't ever lie."

"Then tell me how you came to be in this world."

"Ah don't rightfully know. Ah fell asleep in a normal world, and woke up in this one."

"Very well. Ah-- I'll be back to question you more later."

"What is your name?"

The yellow pegasus mumbled a bit, not looking at her.

"Please, speak up. I won't hurt you."

"F-fl..." and back to the mumbling. Nightmare Moon scowled.

"Louder, please."

"M-my name is Fluttershy..."

"Why are you here?"

More incomprehensible muttering. Nightmare Moon lost her patience. "Miss Fluttershy, if you do not tell me why you are here, I will have to hurt one of your friends, are we understood?!"

The yellow pony's head snapped up, her eyes boring into the Nightmare's. "What did you just say?" Her voice was controlled, barely.

"I said that if you don't tell me, I will kill one of your friends."

"How dare you?" The pegasus stepped towards her. "How DARE you?! Using my friends to get information from me?! I will have you know that nobody, I repeat, NOBODY! Threatens. My. Friends! Miss Nightmare Moon, we are going to end you, and I am going to make sure you can never hurt anypony ever again!"

Nightmare Moon was backed up against the wall, staring in horror at the psychotic pony in front of her. "I... I will be taking my leave. You have been most valuable, your friends will be spare." She walked out, closed the door, and started shaking.

This was getting tedious. "Yes, but just your name, please."

"Well, I have a lot of things I go by, usually it's Pinkie Pie, but my parents call me Pinkamina Dianne Pie, and sometimes I get called Pinks, or--"

"Pinkie Pie, very well. And why are you here?"

"To stop the evil nastiness of course, I mean after the first time we banished you and turned Discord back to stone, we thought we'd be done, but you're back and he's back and--"

Nightmare Moon walked out, ordering her Night Guards to muzzle the pink pony and stay out of the room. Obviously, this one was dangerously insane.

"State your name."

"Rarity. I must say, this cell is most unbecoming. Would it kill you to put a window in, maybe add some curtains?"

"Miss Rarity, we are not here to discuss room design. Why are you here?"

"Well we were going to put a stop to you, but I think it would be much better if we redesigned your look first. The whole 'night time shadow' look is so out of style."

"I. Don't care. About style. How were you intending to stop me?"

"I refuse to tell you that, simply because it would go against our own plans."

"You are very resolute, just like your friend Twilight."

Rarity gave her a small grin.

"We'll see how much you talk when I've turned your mane green."

"Your name."

"Rainbow Dash."

"Why are you here?"

"To kick your flanks back to the moon."

"Interesting. And how did you intend to do that exactly?"

"With the Elements of Harmony, duh!"

"The Ele-- The Elements of Harmony?! I have long since altered those, little Rainbow Dash."

"Tch, yeah right. We used 'em just a couple months ago to beat Discord, and months before that to turn you back into Luna!"

"You are obviously a liar. I will hear no more of what you have to say until you are on the wall."

She walked out. As she did, she gave a sigh. These ponies weren't insane. Or, at least, they weren't delusional about their goals. They all gave pretty much the same story, though that might mean that they had gotten it straight before they had come into her castle.

But, that orange one was very convincing. She seemed like a pony who never lied, and Nightmare Moon had the nagging feeling that she was being entirely honest. She decided to collaborate with Discord again.

He was in his personal wing of the palace, boiling some ponies in what appeared to be their own blood. "You are most foul, you know."

"I know. So, what did Twilight Sparkle and her pony scouts want?"

"You know of them?"

"Oh yeah, sure. Can't stand 'em."

"And why would that be, might I ask?"

Discord opened his mouth to speak, then stopped. "Uh..."

"You have much explaining to do."

"All right, here's the deal. I'm Discord, a physical manifestation of the idea of disharmony. I exist everywhere at once in space. That means I'm here, in Ponyville... and in other universes that lie basically along side this one. It's all very metaphysical and I'll tell you more when I have the time."

"Go on..."

"Well, in one universe, your sister sealed you up in the moon, ruled for a thousand years, and then Twilight Sparkle and her gang destroyed you, turning you back into Luna."

"Discord, be serious!"

"I kid you not. And then, I got free and they resealed me with those Elements of Harmony."

"So why are they here now?" Her voice was icy, warning him that if she didn't like the answer...

"Because I wanted them to suffer the pain of this world."

"You brought them here?!" She glared at him, and he flinched.

"Only so we could have fun crushing them beneath our boot!"

The Alicorn was panicked. "Discord, this is a serious thing! They honestly wish to destroy me! Nopony's wanted to do that since I started my reign!"

"But it's under control!" Discord smiled. "We have them in the dungeons, they can't get free. Just treat them like you did your sister, and they'll be out of your mane soon enough."

"I... I suppose you're right. Just a minor problem..." She found herself not believing it, however. No good could come of having her sister's personal student hanging around.

She thought for many months, going in to question the orange and purple ones ever week. The rest could rot, for all she cared. A lunatic, a pony who seemed to want to rip her spine out, a fashion obsessy, and an egomaniac weren't really ponies she cared to talk with.

In the course of months, she got the story from Twilight Sparkle and Applejack. They were bearers of the Elements of Magic and Honesty, respectively. Twilight had had a minor breakdown when Nightmare Moon told her what had happened to the elements in this world.

And that was when she got an idea. If these six were attuned to the Elements of Harmony, perhaps they could be twisted to her Elements of Chaos. She brought the idea up to Discord who just shook his head. "That's exactly what I tried my dear, and it failed miserably."

"Yes, but I understand the methods were different. For one thing, you hadn't turned the actual Elements."

"True..." He frowned.

"And, for another, my sister sent Twilight letters to give her hope. That doesn't exist here."

"And false. Because it already happened in their world, Sparkly Poo still has that hope, and since you've destroyed the Element of Magic..."

"i'll make a new version of it. The Element of Magic, second edition."

"And where will you get the raw power to do that?"

Nightmare Moon grinned evilly at him.

The screams from her throne room that night were decidedly male.

It took a year of work to craft the essence that had been Discord, but the result was well worth it. A dark purple gem that glowed faintly, that had the most powerful magic in the world trapped inside of it. In this year, the six friends went from prisoners to 'guests with restrictions.' They were free to wander certain parts of the palace, but they weren't allowed to leave the grounds, and they were to be constantly watched by Night Guards.

When the Element of Magic was finished, Nightmare Moon brought the six into her throne room. "I have decided to trust each of you. I like to think we are friends now. You see I am not evil, and so I will present you each with a familiar artifact."

She smiled as the six looked on eagerly. She knew what their thoughts were. She would give them the Elements of Harmony and they would use them to defeat her and right the world.

"To Applejack, I present the Element of Honesty. May its truth guide you through difficult times." She levitated the orange gem to the Earth Pony, grinning as Applejack put it on.

"To Rainbow Dash, the Element of Loyalty. May you always be an asset to your friends." Rainbow wore the deep red jewel proudly, sticking her chest out.

"To Pinkie Pie, the Element of Laughter. May you bring cheer to many lives." The blue gem stuck to the pink pony who bounced a bit in excitement.

"To Rarity, the Element of Generosity. May your generous deeds help everypony you come across." The purple maned unicorn wore her dark pink gem with a sense of elegance, smiling.

"To Fluttershy, the Element of Kindness. May your kind deeds never go unnoticed." Fluttershy bowed a bit modestly as the light pink gem went to her chest.

"And to Twilight Sparkle, I give you the glue which binds them together. The Element of Magic. May it help you in the most desperate times." The silver tiara floated onto Twilight's head, and Twilight smirked.

"Thank you very much, Nightmare Moon. Now, if we may respond to you in a way that shows our feelings..."

"Go right ahead."

"All right girls, you know the drill!" The six elements started glowing, white lines shooting between them. Nightmare Moon didn't remember this, but she assumed that when wielded by more than two, it was just something that happened.

The distorted rainbow shot from the six, washing over Luna. So this was what Discord and Celestia had felt like, being engulfed by the Elements. The colors hurt her eyes, and she could see dark forms among them, as if off in the distance. Then, the rainbow moved from her. She watched as it bounced back to the friends, engulfing them instead. screams of pain and anger sounded from the maelstrom, and she laughed.

When the light cleared, she was still staring at six ponies. Their colors, though, were muted, darkened. Their eyes were flat. As she watched, the six bowed to her.

"Thank you so much for this wonderful gift, my queen," Twilight Sparkle said, grinning. "Tell us, is there any way we can do your bidding?"