The Only Chapter This Story Needs
“I could go for some coffee. You guys want anything?” Gallus asked to the assembled creatures sitting at their lunch table.
Not that it was really ‘theirs’ as the school didn’t actually assign lunch tables… But it was ‘theirs’, and the whole school knew it.
Sandbar shook his head. “I’m good, my classes are done for the day, so no point getting all buzzed up.”
Ocellus perked up from her book. “I’ll take a latte, if you don’t mind.”
Smolder shrugged. “Eh, fuck it. Get me a macchiato.”
Yona merely nodded. “Black.”
Gallus nodded, keeping track of the orders in his head. “You want any sugar packets with that?”
Yona suddenly got a dour look on her face as she leaned forward, putting her face right up to Gallus.
“Black.” Yona repeated.
“Got it, black.” Gallus said, finally getting the picture. He actually had to remind himself that today was a fasting day for Yaks. Better to do whatever Yona said and avoid any form of wrath that started with ‘S’ and ended with ‘mashing’.
Silverstream pondered her options for a hot second. “I’ll take…a pumpkin spice latte with five shots of espresso, heavy on the cream, caramel drizzle, honey drizzle, coconut flakes, shot of Thracian yogurt, with a pump of vanilla, matcha infusion, chunks of banana, chunks of strawberry, two cups of protein powder, top it with frappuccino chips and blueberries, and replace the milk with half coconut milk and half almond milk.”
“Silv, just do cocaine like a normal person.” Smolder said, deadpan.
Ocellus looked up from her book again. “I pity your poor dentist.”
“I don’t have a dentist.” Silverstream admitted.
Gallus recounted the order in his head. “So, a latte, a macchiato, black as Cozy Glow’s heart, and an abomination against all things holy. Got it.” With that, Gallus got up from his seat and made his way to the cafeteria’s self-serve café.
As he left, Yona couldn’t help herself but to lean back in her seat a bit to get a better view of Gallus’ retreating back-side.
“Yona hate to see him go, but love watching him leave.” Yona said, a dreamy look on her face.
“Right? I betcha I could bounce a coin off those puppies.” Silverstream said, now getting in on the action since Yona opened up the topic.
“Like two Hearth’s Warming hams inside a soft, downy pillow.” Smolder said, biting her bottom lip. She even started to cup imaginary buttocks in her claws, just left with the idea of what it would feel like to fondle their griffonian friend’s posterior.
Silverstream giggled at the mental image of Smolder’s metaphor. “They’re probably big enough to hold all of his childhood trauma.”
Smolder winced a bit at that. “I don’t think any ass on earth is that big, Silv.”
Silverstream considered the actual metaphysical logistics a bit. “Hmm, yeah, I guess your right. That might be too much of a cascading effect to really be properly represented in any physical capacity, particularly someone’s cute tush.”
Once more, Ocellus looked up from her book, even the allure of pre-unification Equestrian history paled in comparison to admiring Gallus’ tight butt. “I know we’re objectifying Gallus right now, and I am absolutely on board with that, but that was really hot, Silverstream.”
Silverstream tilted her head in thought. “You think he does kegels?”
Ocellus shrugged. “He said he wants to join the Royal Guard after graduation. Probably does a lot of squats for his workout routine.”
Sandbar nodded. “Can confirm, he even got an exercise mat for our dorm and everything. I like to sneak a peak when he thinks I’m reading comics.”
“Spill, hippie. You ever get any of that action close-up?” Smolder said, pointing a fork faux-threateningly at Sandbar.
Sandbar merely nodded again. “One time after dodgeball practice, I gave him a good spank in the locker room. Just your traditional male-bonding ritual after working up a sweat, no homo whatsoever.”
Sandbar paused to take a bite of his salad. “Yeah, it’s pretty freaking firm, but still soft enough that you could probably use it like a pillow for a nap.”
“That’s hot.” All the female creatures present said simultaneously. Possibly excluding Ocellus, being Gender-Fluid and all that.
“Tree of Harmony as my witness, I will someday smack that booty and count the bounces.” Smolder said, firey determination in her eyes.
“Yona would love to smack that booty too, but Yona worried Yak strength might just smack booty clean off.” Yona said, dejected.
Silverstream patted Yona’s back, comforting her friend. “We all appreciate your sacrifice.”
The group ceased all discussion on the topic as Gallus made his way back, semi-flying a few feet off the ground so he could support the assortment of drinks on both of his claws.
“Here you guys go.” He said, depositing each drink to their respective recipient. “Sandbar, I know you said you didn’t want anything, but they had those Yakyakistan sodas you like, so I figured…”
“Aw, thanks man, appreciate it.” Sandbar said, tilting the fizzy drink at him. His colon was going to hate him later, but his taste buds were going to love him before then.
“You guys weren’t talking about me behind my back, were you?” Gallus said, giving a good-natured fake glare at the group.
“No, of course not, G. Whatever made you think so?” Smolder said, fluttering her eyes to look more innocent.
“Uh-huh…” Gallus said, reaching for a stirrer for his drink. Somewhere, an unlucky cosmic being rolled a Nat 1 on a dexterity check and Gallus fumbled with the stirrer, dropping it on the floor.
“Ah, shoot.” Gallus said, bending over to pick it up.
Yona couldn’t help herself but to lean over Gallus as he bent down. She got a good look, nodded, and mouthed ‘Nice’ under her breath.
As Gallus got back up, he couldn’t help but notice all the mirthful smirks on his friends’ faces. “Okay, seriously, what did I miss?”
Sandbar chuckled. “Nothing, Gallus. We’re just… really happy that you’re our friend.”
Gallus was a bit surprised by the sudden earnestness, but smiled all the same, a warm feeling welling in his chest. “Aw, thanks guys. I feel the same way.”
