Something was wrong. The last thing I remembered was Carina crawling into bed with me. I wanted to talk to her, but she fell asleep instantly. I put my arm over her and closed my eyes to fall asleep myself, but I didn't end up in my Dream. There was a-

SNAP

-and I was opening my eyes to total darkness. I stumbled, standing up for some reason I could't remember. I looked down at myself, there was a single beam of light coming from far above me. It let me see that I looked fine... I actually looked better. All my burnt fur was back and my hands and fingers looked as if I hadn't worked a day in my life.

... Which may be true actually, discounting throwdowns with crazy changelings and spar obsessed lunar princesses.

That beam of light also let me see the ground I stood on. A small patch of yellow flowers. I was probably blocking their only source of light. Cautiously, I took steps off the marigolds and looked around me. I thought I had night vision, but it might have been too dark even for that. I held out my hand, thinking of a flashlight as a portal opened above me.

I jumped away as a piano smashed onto the ground.

That... was not a flashlight. I slowly put out my hand again, thinking of a torch.

A second piano, but now it was on fire.

"Hey! What's the big idea!" A series of vines picked up the pianos and threw them away from the marigold patch as I turned around and looked down. "Flowers and fire don't go together buster! Who are you? I've never seen you before."

It was a little talking flower.

"I... am lost." The flowers oddly angry face scowled.

"No shit. How did you even get here? The monsters are locked out of the ruins and you are certainly not some human who fell down from-"

"Human?" How? This wasn't my home.

"Oh, are we interupting now? What, never heard of a-"

"Sorry, uh, whatever your name is-" The flower turned absolutely demonic.

"It's Flowey!"

"- Yeah I don't care. I gotta go." I turned away from the cursing flower as I opened a portal and thought of-

Pineapples

-I stepped through and immediately had to close my mouth as water tried to rush into my lungs. I didn't want to test my deep-space or underwater capabilities, so I needed to leave, now. I opened a portal, telling myself-

I could really go for some shawarma right now

"Hi! I'm Spongebob! What's-"

"Fuck off!" And I stepped through. Apparently I can speak underwater. Or maybe it was just that world. I didn't get to contemplate it, or even get a look at where I ended up, before I got beaned in the face by a metal discus. "Gah! Motherfucker! What the hell-"

"Who are you, and what are you doing here?" I rubbed at my sore eyes and tried to see who the hell just attempted to take my eyes out. There was... I was hesitant to call them humans. One was big and green, another was either wearing the most absurd armor or was made of metal as he laid on the ground. I ignored the rest as the man in front caught the metal disc and wore it as a shield.

"I'm not here on purpose asshole! Do you cripple everyone you don't know?!"

"We just got done with one alien invasion. Sorry if we're a little on edge." He didn't sound sorry in the slightest. "Now, I'll ask one more time-"

"Fuck you and the comic book you walked out of." The iron man slightly sat up.

"He knows what comic books are?" I turned around, ignoring the shouting and yelling as I opened another portal. It was clear in my mind, the image of-

A pirate ship, sailing the seven seas

I stepped out into pandemonium. It was a boat, tipping backwards into the ocean as giant tentacles cracked and splintered the floor in its grips. People in ratty clothes held on to ropes and eachother for dear life, and I was officially pissed.

I flew up into the air to get good look at the monster. A giant squid or octopus trying to make a meal out of people, and while it was still mostly underwater, I could see where it's main body was hidden under the waves. I pulled my focus to between my antlers, and decided that I wanted that fish dead. A beam of energy shot out from above my head, carving a path through the ocean as it severed the creature from all of its limbs.

Well, looks like you do have other tricks up your metaphorical sleeve

It was only as an afterthought that I exerted some will over the ship, slowing its fall and making sure it didn't break as the lifeless limbs limply fell into the frothy waters below.
I ignored how most of the people brandished swords at me as I landed back on the deck, I had other things to worry about. Only one of the men actually walked up to me, a very exagerated swagger in is step, but I ignored him.

"Well, I must say, that it isn't often a stranger comes to the rescue of Captain Jack Sparrow. It's even less often I think I'm fuckin seeing things. I don't think I am quite that drunk yet."

I didn't hear them gasp and yell as I opened another portal. I imagined-

A nice clean pair of underwear Found you bitch

I heard laughing as I opened my eyes to another new world. Buildings and skyscrapers surrounded me, and several cars had to stop to avoid hitting me in the middle of the street. Luna could influence my powers when she was in my Dream. Now someone I didn't know was hitching a ride and fucking with my powers from inside. I took a look around to see that I was surrounded by humans again, and I glanced up as something flew down from the sky towards me.

"I don't suppose you'll leave if I ask nicely?" A man in blue, with a red cape flowing behind him as he hung suspended in the air under some unseen power. He did appear to be wearing a pair of red underwear over his get-up, but the big stylized 'S' on his chest took most of the attention away from the rest of his costume. All that said, I figured it would be easier to ask for help than it would be to try to randomly land in an empty world.

"I would actually, if I could." The flying man just crossed his arms. Hopefully he would actually be willing to help.

"What's stopping you? You didn't seem to have any trouble appearing in the middle of traffic."

"Someone or something is in my head, interfering with my powers. It won't let me go home." He actually stop looking so stern, adopting a more converned expression.

"That's... quite the story, but not the most ridiculous thing I've heard this week. Are your powers at risk of harming yourself, or those around you?" I shook my head, but I was sure it wasn't that simple.

"So far, no. My powers haven't done anything without my wanting to use them, but they keep doing things I'm not trying to do." The flying man put his hand on his chin, I was beginning to hate that expression.

"How long have have they been going haywire?"

"I woke up less than ten minutes ago outside my home dimension-"

"Wait, you're from another dimension?" One of the cars started honking their horn, clearly someone didn't have a sense of self-preservation. "Nevermind, let's take this somewhere else. Can you fly?"

Superman stood on the edge of the skyscraper he led us too, and I sat down with my legs hanging off of it. He stood confidently as he talked about how he was part of a group of heroes called the Justice League, saving the world and stopping threats normal people couldn't defend themselves against. I, in turn, fidgeted with the towel wrapped around my waist as I explained the Dream.

"So, your dreams power your abilities, and are also inside their own dimension. Anyone in your dream who isn't meant to be there can influence them. You came to this conclusion because a pony princess accidentally did it one night."

"You could just say you don't believe me instead of wasting my time." The superhero put his hands up as if to pacify me.

"Now hold on, I'm not saying I don't believe you. This princess wouldn't happen to be a dark blue color would she? With silver shoes?" Despite the situation, I felt my frustration give way to some surprise.

"I... Yes. How did you know?"

"I thought that may be the case. Her legs popped up here a little while ago. Gave one of my colleagues a headache trying to figure out how horse hooves appeared out of thin air to knock out one of his bad guys." I... that must have been one of the times me and Luna sparred. I didn't realize I was tossing her through into different worlds though, the portals were just meant to disorient her and control the battle.

"Will you help me then? I have an idea of my own, but if you have a super human ally who could help in this 'Justice League' of yours I would be willing to give them a shot. I am in a hurry though. I don't... I need to get back home." Surely an organization of actual superheroes would be able to come up with something better than what I was thinking.

"I think I know someone who could help. Let me give him a call."

"I am unable to help you." I'm pretty sure I was glaring at the green martian. Superman hyped up Martian Manhunter as the expert of telepathy and psychic powers. Also, what hero names themselves the 'Manhunter?' I was definitely missing something. "Your psychic abilities are quite vast compared to my own, and what little I was able to do to gain access to them has been blocked by whoever is already inside. I am sorry." I just sighed and rubbed at my forehead.

"Alright. That's... fine. I still have Plan A." Though I was pretty sure it wasn't going to work. I calmed down and tried to slow my breathing. I wanted to enter my Dream the traditional way. Pretty sure I stood there for half an hour with two other aliens staring at me before I snarled and gave up. "Plan A dash B. Do you know anyone who could force me to sleep?"

I was brought to a dark stage to meet a sorceress named Zatanna Zatara. We explained the situation to her before and I prepared myself as she spoke her incantation.

"Peels." ... I was both still awake and terribly underwhelmed. "...Peels."

"... Please tell me you aren't just saying sleep backwards." The woman in the top hat just grimaced. "Fuck me. Alright, fine. Plan B then. This is the worst plan, so if anyone has any other ideas, now would be the time to say." There was no answer for a moment, until Superman awkwardly presented one.

"I could... Knock you out?"

"... That is now Plan C. Plan B requires some space, so can you lead the way to the largest open space you can think of?"

Thankfully, it was night-time when we reached the desert. Zatanna stayed behind as Superman and Manhunter lead me away, but someone started following us in a jet-black plane. My hosts promised he was a friend, and that was enough for me to ignore him. Soon, we reached the center and landed on the shifty ground, and a man in a dark-grey costume disembarked from the jet and made his way over. He was the first hero I met here that I couldn't see the face of. A dark cowl with pointed ears hid most of his expression from me, so I couldn't have guessed what he was going to say next.

"Give me a reason to trust you." Superman scowled as I stared disbelievingly at the man.

"The fuck!? Give me a reason to trust you! Hi! I'm Elfilis. I'm being kept away from my friends and loved ones. Who the fuck are you and why do you hide your face?" He smirked just the slightest bit at me.

"Most of us hide our faces. You've just met the few of us that don't. You really just want to go home?"

"Yes, I had no intention of leaving it and ending up here." He looked to the Manhunter, who only nodded, before turning back to me. "Alright. You can call me Batman. You and your princess defeated a dangerous man, albeit accidentally, so I'm willing to give you some benefit of the doubt here. Now, what's this plan of yours?" I narrowed my eyes at Batman, but I supposed that was good as I was going to get from him.

"My plan is to exhaust myself, to use up all the Dream until it doesn't have enough room to house it's intruder anymore."

"How...?" We all turned to the Martian Manhunter, and I got the impression he would've blushed if he could. "Your mind is... expansive to say the least. How could you possibly exert yourself so much to exhaust it down to nothing? To say nothing of the dangers of doing so to yourself."

"I've done it a few times now, though not on purpose. I can create things in the Dream, made out of Dream, and bring them here to the real world. I know a few things in particular that could use it all up in one fell swoop, but I'm going to be fighting with whoever is in there to create what I actually intend to create. Hence asking for a lot of space, because there is going to be a lot of junk around here. Now back up please, I'm not waiting to do this anymore." The three hastily made some distance as I closed my eyes to focus.

I crystalized the image in my mind, clearly the shape of-

Maccarroni

It was-

Polka-Dotted

Fuck off! It was something-

Fragile

No! It was a-

Friend? There are no friends. He was shaped like a Friend. All 'friends' do is ruin the fun. A fun loving reliable Friend. There. Are. No. Such. Friends.

You may be lonely, but that gives you no right to force your insecurities onto me! I have my own problems to deal with!

You dare!? I'll have you know that-

Friends are real. They exist. People who make your day better just by being there. It is the foundation of Love, a very real and measurable force in our world. And I know of the most incorruptible Friend there is. Round and pink, with two dots for eyes and a wide smile. His whole world, his entire being, created and dedicated to BEING EVERYONES FRIEND.

As my world faded to black, I briefly saw the image of a strange snake-like creature. With a lion paw on one arm and a goats hoof on one leg, his warped face glaring at me as the world fell apart on him, crushing him. He only mouthed the word-

Touché

And the last thing I saw was it popping like confetti.

Batman watched, one eyebrow cocked under his cowl, as portals opened up around 'Elfilis,' chucking out a random assortment of items. Pasta, clothes, dinnerware, weapons, candy, and a slew of other things that seemed to follow no rhyme or reason. Though it seemed to spit out food items more often than not. He turned to Martain Manhunter, knowing he wouldn't need to give voice to his question.

"His mind is suffering no strain from these items so far, but it does seem to be gaining a focus that was absent before." Sure enough, the items became less random slowly. Cotton candy, bubblegum, cake, pink clay, pink cookies, pink bouncy balls, and so on. "I think... yes. I believe he is doing it. His presence is diminishing at an alarming rate." The portals all closed until only one remained. There was only a moment in which nothing happened, and then it violently expelled a blue blob into the pile of objects. Elfilis collapsed onto his knees, out cold, and Batman wasted no time.

"Superman, check on him, make sure he's okay. Manhunter, with me. Let's find this object he made, make sure it's-" He stopped, hearing what sounded like a vacuum as most of the food (as well as some non-food items) began to get sucked into the center of the pile. It took seconds for him to find where it was all going.

A blue round creature, with no arms or legs that Batman could discern, with a long tongue whipping around in circles outside of its large mouth. This was enough to make a small tornado that funnelled all of the food into it, and when it was done it closed its mouth and licked its lips with its still extended tongue. It might have been looking at them, but it was imposible to tell with its eyes bouncing around separately from each other the way they were. It wagged its tongue back forth slightly and spoke to them.

"Goi!" Sort of. Batman turned to Manhunter, who still didn't need to hear the question before answering.

"He says his name is Gooey."

Author's Note

Don't worry, this isn't the end of the Discord conflict.