This Ain't Compendium: Holidays

Ponyville’s Town Square

The rainbow colored mane Pegasus landed on a house’s roof and, losing no time, looked around the streets in search of the “Wonderbolt” her pink friend mentioned. No more than ten seconds passed before she started to feel impatient. She sighed in disappointment and mumbled: “guess that Pinkie pulled me another prank after all.” When she turned around, she couldn’t help but to grin widely after spotting the Pegasus with the wonderbolt costume behind her.

“Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh!” She said in excitement as she was squeaking like a fanmare. She then got close to him, almost being face to face and then said: “Heya! My name’s Dash, Rainbow Dash!” She then extended her “bone” hoof.

“Well, well, well”, Dempsey said with a grin, trying not to laugh at the blue Pegasus’ excitement, “seems like you seem t’love zombies, don’t ya?” He looked at the costume she was wearing and thought: “damn, she looks very similar to a shrieker maggot whore. Can’t tell if this is just coincidence, or just another shameless ad put by da fuckin’ writer. Son of a...”

“So, what brings ya here?” Dash asked while still grinning and extending her hoof. “I’ve never seen you before, especially during these celebrations.” She kept looking at him with curiosity; she used to think that the Wonderbolt with golden mane was a mare and not a stallion. “So, what’s your name, pal?”

“My name?” He replied slightly nervous, “well, my name is Dem...” He stopped for a moment, “I mean Steven.
Yeah...Steven.” He grinned awkwardly as he thought: “fuckin’ original name, she ain’t gonna believe that.”

“Well, nice to meet ya, Steven”, she shook her hoof with his.

“Damn, she actually did. Heh, good job Dempsey. Oorah.” He thought.

“So...” She unfolded her wings, “wanna race with me? It’d be rad to race with one of the fastest ponies in Equestria.”

“What?”

“Yeah, a quick race before, y’know, hangin’ out.”

“Well...” He looked back at his wings and unfolded them. As he looked back at her, he thought: “fuckin’ Pinkie never said
that. Damn it, I dunno how to fly!”

“So?” She grinned with confidence, “something wrong, Steven?”

“No, no, erm...” he looked back at his wings again, “ I can’t because... erm... my wings hurt a little.”

“Heh, nice joke”, she got closer to him and touched his wings. “They seem fine to me.”

“Woah”, he couldn’t help but to feel a little aroused after his wings got touched. As he stood back from her instinctively, he thought: “why the hell did I feel odd?”

“Something wrong?” The blue Pegasus asked with curiosity, breaking his train of thought.

“Do not touch ‘em again, you sl...” He hesitated for a moment and quickly said: “...I mean, Dash.”

“Fiiine!” She replied as she stood behind him and began to push him. “C’mon, Steve, don’t chicken out and race with me.”

“Chicken out?” He unfolded his wings completely and said with a burst of courage. “Nopony calls me a chicken and gets away with it!” He pointed to his left and said: “A quick race to that fancy-looking building.”

“Now we’re talking!” She said and then she stood next to him. “On three: One, two, three!” She quickly unfolded her wings, fluttered them and flew with great speed to Carousel boutique.

“Fuck, she’s fast!” Dempsey thought, “Okay Dempsey, you can do it, no big deal. It must be as easy as piloting a plane.” He fluttered his wings as fast as he could. “I can make it, I can make it!” He was cheering himself up and then he jumped off the roof. At first he managed to hover for a brief moment in the air, but he began to fall down after a couple of seconds.

“Fffuuuu!...” He yelled while he was falling down. When he crushed on the floor, he lifted up his head and spat the grass that got into his mouth. “... This fucking sucks!” He thought and then began to stand up slowly. Suddenly, he felt a hoof on his front leg, helping him to stand up. He sighed and looked back at the pony who helped him. “Heh, thanks, ma’am.”

“Do not worry”, she answered. She had gray coat, dark gray mane, grayish purple eyes and the cutie mark of a treble clef. Also, she was wearing a scarecrow costume. “That impact seemed hard. Are you okay?”

“Yep. Nothing a good ol’ can of beer can’t fix”, he answered with a smirk while dusting off his costume. “My name’s Dem... Steven, what’s yours?”

“What a delightful name, Steven. My name is Octavia.” She said with a slight grin.

“Octavia? Cool name”, he nodded, “gotta name my next daughter like that.”

She couldn’t help but to giggle delightfully at his commentary and said: “I have never seen a Wonderbolt visiting Ponyville before.”

“Heh, me neither”, he answered with awkwardness. He then thought: “Oh my god, this pony’s pretty!... wait, the hell I just thought?” He frowned while still thinking: “’s this some kind of shippin’, fucker? ‘Cause I don’t agree.”

“Is there something wrong?” the gray earth pony asked. He looked back at her eyes and he felt his heartbeat going faster.

“Damn, she’s gorgeous, but she ain’t a woman. She speaks in fancy though... oh, for fuck’s sake, this shouldn’t be tough!.. Heh, a random rhyme.... focus, Dempsey!” He scratched the back of his head. “I still need t’pull that prank, but I’m havin’ a chance t’talk with this sweetness. If I’m gonna stay in this fuckin’ pony world for the rest of my fuckin’ life, better be with a fuckin’ pretty pony... wait, what?”

“Steven?”She tilted her head, still waiting for his answer. He was still looking at her eyes. For a moment, he noticed how her purple eyes heighten the beauty of her delicate face; he looked at her delicate, soft, long, black straight mane; and most of all, he thought the pink bow tie on the white collar, she was wearing on her neck, suited her in a way that could be described with a word: Perfection.

“Ahh screw this. First I meet her, then I prank that slut. Easy as pie, I can do both... Wonder what would my wife think ‘bout this. She’d surely say I’m a sick zoophile fuck,” he grinned, “what’s the worst that could happen anyway? I mean, couldn’t get worse than being raped by two lesbo pon-bitches.”

Suddenly, he reached out his hoof to her and asked: “wanna hang out with me, Octavia?” He smiled awkwardly as he thought: “too direct, Dempsey, too fuckin’ direct.”

“I do not know. I still have a performance on stage in an hour.”

“Performance?” He said while grinning more and thinking: “sounds like a table dance show.”

“I am the cello player of the royal symphony”, she said while still keeping her calm and fanciness, “and it would be a disaster if I arrive even a bit late.”

“Cello player? Wow, sounds cool.” He replied while he thought: “aww, there goes the wild night. What’s a cello?”

“Really?” He answered with a smile. He nodded and said:

“Yep, I like that classical music and all that shi.. I mean,stuff. So, will ya gimme the honor t’hang out with me?”

“Well...” she thought for a moment and looked at her watch. “I do not see any inconvenience. I accept your request, Sir Steven.” She then turned to her right and said: “let us go to the coffee shop, shall we?”

“’kay”, she answered and began to follow her, standing beside her. He grinned with a victorious glimpse and thought: “who’s da man? You’re da man, Dempsey.”