Striving for Perfection

I took a deep breath before closing the book and quickly scrolling through the runes in my head that I remembered and considered necessary. Then my gaze fell on the crowd of the dead still waiting for me. Everyone is also standing knee-deep in corpses, still half-burned and still waiting for the moment to pounce on me. Thanks to the skeleton that holds them back. And fuck him for almost turning me into a pancake.

Anyway, we have things to do. Figure out how to get out of here. Preferably whole.

I leaned against the wall and began to inspect the crowd of creatures while I scrolled through my arsenal in my head. An arrow, a ball, an explosion, a shield, tentacles and a couple of new runes. The worst thing is that I can only guess at their function. Of course, I could check them while I am in relative safety, but I am afraid that they may be expensive in terms of magic costs. It will be bad if I accidentally spend most of the magic in nowhere. Besides, until I start the massacre, blood will not cheapen the runes. Trouble. Not to mention that I have no passive protection other than my skin. I have no desire to test the fire resistance of my skin.

Suddenly, an idea came to me. Why don't I stuff, books under my clothes? This will not only provide me with some kind of protection, but also allow me to carry away as much valuable information as possible. Besides, there must be some linguist outside. I hope.

I took a step towards the bookcase and started shoving books into all the places I could at a fast pace. By the belt, in the sleeves and in the belly area. The only exception where I didn't put books is my feet. I don't think they have a chance not to fall out of their clothes. However, in other places, the probability of not falling out is also low.

Sighing, I closed my coat and tucked it into my trousers to increase the likelihood of books not falling out. Having finished with this, my gaze fell on the crowd waiting for me in order to find a place for a breakthrough. But there were so many of them and they were arranged so chaotically that it didn't make sense. Jumping over, for example, a pony will not work due to the fact that there will be dozens of other creatures behind it. There is only one option left. Massacre.

Well, have fun, crybaby. YOU think it's just a fun hunt, don't you?

I stood next to the skeleton, ready to rip out his other eye. The first one is in my pocket. I hope I don't lose it. Preparing for further testing, I cracked my neck and flexed my knuckles. Then I abruptly thrust my left hand into the eye sockets of the skeleton and pulled out a crystal-like eye from there. Instantly, I felt the pressure drop almost to zero and felt the crowd break away from the place.

A dozen creatures attacked me in a wave at the same time. My eyes instantly began to study the crowd looking for an invisible point. In the next moment, I quickly grabbed the unicorn by the horn, placed an explosion rune on his stomach and threw it somewhere into the crowd. In the next second, several griffins clung to my back, starting to tear my coat with their claws. I quickly turned around on the spot, throwing off the griffins and at the same time striking with a U-turn. Every time my foot touched someone's head, the air was filled with the sound of cracking and the smell of iron. Following this, there was a loud explosion sound that tossed and hit a lot of creatures on the ceiling. And a large pool of blood appeared on the ground.

Grinning, I quickly created the first new rune. It had a spiked outer circle, a bloody central circle, and a mist symbol. In the next moment, the rune began to attract blood to itself and fill up like a vessel. When the rune took on a red color, it trembled and a few moments released a thick red mist filling the room. I felt that the creatures were already on their feet and began randomly beating in all directions trying to find me. Stifling a chuckle, I headed in the direction where the stairs were located approximately. But suddenly, in the thick of the fog, some Minotaur was able to detect me and ran wanting to impale me on the horns. Seeing this, I made a reflexively high kick from the bottom up, which caused the Minotaur's head to come off and bounce off the ceiling like a soccer ball. After a moment, I realized my mistake. The others heard it and I felt everyone turn their heads to me.

I quickly ran to the place where I remembered there was a ladder and began to create an explosion rune. But to my surprise, as soon as I created the rune, it caught right in the fog. Assuming the worst, I accelerated my pace, not wanting to face the consequences of this action. Along with my acceleration, the crowd began to move towards me, focusing on the sound. Even worse is that I feel of an even bigger crowd from below.

Suddenly there was no ground under my feet and I felt my face collide with something marble. The next moment, the crowd pounced on me from above, pinning me to the steps. I abruptly threw my arms to the sides, scattering many creatures from the crowd to the sides like dolls and heard an explosion followed by a whole series. Twitching several times in different directions, I was able to throw off all the creatures and take a moment to get up. From the point where I'm standing now, there were at least a dozen torn corpses with organs spilling out and spilled crimson blood. I'm sure there are a lot more victims up there where most of the fog was.

Feeling another incoming wave, I grinned and decided to show them who is in charge. Rushing forward with lightning speed, I grabbed a pony in my right hand and a minotaur in my left and began to strike at the rest of the crowd with them, moving forward like batons. With each blow, the air was filled with the sound of bones cracking and a metallic smell. Over time, the pony, followed by the Minotaur, bent in half and became unusable as weapons. With a powerful swing from right to left, I threw down a lot of creatures from the circular staircase, followed by unusable tools. For a moment, the endless crowd stopped after seeing the simplicity with which I mow them down, but then they continued to come at me like puppets in another wave.

Grinning, I drew attention to the huge pool of blood in front of me and decided to test the next rune. Hastily, I formed a rune almost identical to the last one, except for the symbol, which this time was a thorn. Pointing my hand at the representative of the crowd who was right in front of me, I expected a simple spike, but it did not happen. The rune turned into a projectile of pure magic and collided with the head of an earth pony just evaporated. Yeah.

The Earth Pony, along with many other members of the crowd, jumped on me from all sides. I leaned forward sharply as if I had sneezed and thus threw most of the creatures into a pool of blood. I thought about it for a second. If the rune did not absorb the blood before the launch, maybe it needs contact with the blood after the launch?

I quickly created a rune with a spike and shot it into the pool of blood under my feet. Then I felt the lines slowly diverge from the puddle to the sides, as if it was filled with magic. In the next moment, some areas on the puddle began to turn into spikes and punch through one by one everyone who got stuck in the puddle. Deciding not to risk it, I jumped up and justifying my assumption, a part of the puddle under me also turned into a thorn. The crowd at the same time, like a single organism, stopped in front of the puddle, not wanting to incur further losses. The fate of those who are already in a puddle is not enviable.

Deciding not to leave them without entertainment, I grabbed a random Minotaur with tentacles while in the air and pulled it to me. Pushing him so that he was under my feet like a skate, I grabbed him with a small grin. After a couple of moments, the Minotaur with me on his stomach landed on several spikes that pierced his arm, legs and neck. Despite his wounds, he continued to desperately try to grab me somehow and let out a growl. Ignoring the pitiful sight, I jumped away from the chest of the Minotaur forward towards the ever-decreasing crowd. All the creatures raised their limbs up as if they wanted to grab me. Even ponies did not skillfully stand on two legs and even managed to stand relatively straight.

Without focusing on the absurdity, I created bouncing arrows in both hands and fired them into the crowd. Arrows randomly bounced off opponents, pushing the unlucky ones with a quick flight down and the rest into the wall. Landing on a small, crowd-free section of the stairs, I decided to experiment. I started creating an explosion rune but decided to invest a lot more magical than usual. I tried diligently to concentrate the magic only in the symbol, not paying attention to the circles. At the end of the creation of the rune, I installed it on one of the stairs and began to run away from the affected area. Almost immediately, I felt the enemies begin to recover and slowly, one by one, rushed in pursuit of me. After a few seconds, my eyes caught a bright light that came from somewhere behind. In the next moment, a deafening explosion blocked my ears and sent me into the wall with its force, forcing me to close my eyes.

Slowly opening my eyes, I hovered in shock from what my experimental explosion could do. A huge piece of the staircase along with the wall simply disappeared, leaving no one and nothing behind. I slid down the wall on one of the steps and barely got up because of severe back pain and a slight feeling of fatigue. Standing up, I looked at my right hand, which was shaking and whose fingertips seemed to have become a little darker. Unfortunately, the next moment I felt the crowd approaching from below and a squadron of dragons to the hole. Acting ahead of the curve, I created a shield around the body and prepared for an attack from two sides. In the next instant, several dragons stuck their heads into the hole left by the explosion and instantly let out fire in all directions with a loud roar. The fire was circling the shield, leaving me unharmed but blinded at the same time.

I closed my eyes and guided by invisible lines ran to the silhouettes of dragons. Once at close range, my left hand swung and delivered a crushing blow to the dragon's nose. From such an action, the dragon closed his mouth, ceasing to breathe fire. Deciding to continue the offensive, I opened my eyes and jumped on the head of the shocked red dragon. The dragon immediately felt my presence and started wagging his head in all directions to throw me off. Since this dragon didn't have horns, I had to improvise. With a strong blow on my left hand, I pierced his skull and felt a slimy substance that collapsed under my force. The brain, definitely. In the next instant, I felt the dragon's movements slow down before it started sliding off its position.

The dead dragon started falling down to the ground with me on its head. The situation was further aggravated by the fact that the other dragons began to fly down and make seething sounds, preparing to spew fire. And the shield is already on the verge of destruction. Looking down, I saw that it was still very far to the ground, but an endless crowd had already gathered from below. Between the hammer and the anvil. Or in this situation, fire and earth. Yeah.

As a way out, I could only find one desperate solution. An explosion rune began to form in my right hand, and I sighed as I prepared for the next part of the plan. I pulled my left hand out of the dead dragon's head, losing my footing and going into free fall. Being in a fall, a rune of a simple ball began to form in my left hand. Then when the rune turned into a ball, I put an explosion on it, which surprisingly worked. Smiling, I threw my hand back before throwing the ball with lightning speed into the crowd on the ground. The balloon quickly reached the ground and after a couple of moments exploded, lifting many representatives of the crowd into the air. From above I saw a huge stream of dragon fire that gradually caught up with me. Analyzing all the creatures thrown into the air, my brain was looking for a route for a comfortable descent.

Having formed a route, I quickly grabbed the nearest earth pony with magical tentacles and jumped away from it forward to the next target. The next thing I pulled the griffin to me, but he turned over in the air like a cat, meeting me not with his back but with his claws. He grabbed me with all his claws, tearing through my clothes but not piercing my skin. Improvising, I crushed his head with a side blow on my left hand, instantly killing him. Wrapping my arms around his shoulders, I jumped forward and down again, continuing the route. The magical tentacles pulled the creature towards me again, this time a Minotaur, and I stood on it like on a skateboard. The ground was rapidly approaching me, and in the end the Minotaur met most of the blow, turning from the force of the blow into a bloody mess under my feet. My knees reflexively bent at an angle close to ninety degrees trying to absorb the impact of the fall.

After making sure that my knees didn't break, I closed my eyes to soothe the headache and focus on the lines. The crowd surrounded me from all sides but did not move forward to let the dragons burn me. Suddenly I noticed a detail. With such a huge cluster of creatures, the lines almost touch each other. Just need a little push. Taking a small breath, I raised my shaking right hand up and began to concentrate a bunch of magic on my ring finger. With each passing moment, the sound of the crackling of the dragons' fire and my magic grew louder. Then, abruptly, like a short circuit, I felt the lines collide in some places and seemed to become denser. With lightning speed, I took a step to the side and put my ring finger charged with magic on the double line that did not manage to move away.

I opened my eyes wanting to see the result and opened my mouth in shock. The line of my dark blue magic instantly dispersed along the lines and continued to spread like a fire. Lifting my head up, I saw how the lines charged with my magic stopped the fire and after a couple of moments they cut into pieces the dragons that did not have time to slow down. The crowd didn't dare move towards me and just stood there being blocked from my view by the fire. But there was one caveat. My magic was being sucked out of control to spread further along the lines. I took a step back, but the magic just stretched out further to keep in contact with the lines. Gradually, I began to feel increasing fatigue and a hellish headache. My legs buckled, sending me to my knees.

So, crybaby, things are bad. A few more seconds and your soul will be empty and you will die with it. So figure it out somehow. To achieve Perfection, you need to be at least alive. Think, think.

One thing popped into my mind. Magic needs oxygen to work properly. Panicking, I clamped my right hand between my legs, trying to at least partially block the magic's access to oxygen. To my own surprise, it started working and after a second or two it stopped and the lines began to slowly lose the charge of my magic and assumed a normal appearance. With difficulty and a cough, I was able to force myself to stand up and assess the situation. My ring finger took on the same completely black appearance as the little finger. Did my little finger suffer in the same way? So I came up with this a long time ago while drunk? Surprisingly.

And strangely bordering on the absurd.

In any case, my skin seemed a little dull, as if I was experiencing severe exhaustion. Along with this, holes and lines formed in the ground around me. There were dragons cut up like sausage salad in the neighborhood. Only the endless crowd remained. And I'm almost completely devastated.

The crowd, seeing this, immediately rushed forward from their place right at me. After taking a few breaths, I tried to raise my arms for a fight, but I could only raise my left and then with difficulty. My eyes started to double, but squinting, I could see the river and behind it the stairs. I closed my eyes a little consoling the headache and getting ready to fight back.

As soon as the opponents were close enough, I ducked and made a circular sweep, knocking down everyone in the affected area. Then I took a sharp step forward and grabbed the nearest fallen Pegasus by the neck with my left hand. Putting up a human shield in front of me, I stepped over the rest of the bedridden and ran straight through the rest of the crowd, pushing everyone I could with my shoulders. As I moved, various creatures tried to grab me or at least hurt me, but all to no avail. Their maximum is to tear up my coat a little.

Pathetic like everyone else.

After a few moments, I began to feel a growing heaviness in the area of my legs. Slightly turning my head back, I discovered that the creatures started grabbing my legs in a desperate attempt to slow me down. Surprisingly, though slowly, but still, surely, they succeed. I decided to focus on the road and on the condition of my human shield. Fur, feathers and in some places the skin has already been torn from the body of the Pegasus due to the constant taking blows on it. Thank you for at least performing its functions.

When the red river became clearly visible, the weight became strong enough to force me to take a quick step. The body of the Pegasus was wounded to such an extent that basically only the skeleton remained, and then with bent bones. Surprisingly, he still resists and twitches as if alive. I wonder if I have completely destroyed at least one on my way, or is their immortality absolute? Seeing the condition of the shield, I moved away from thinking and threw it into the river before continuing to walk towards it, trying not to notice the increasing weight. Just keep going, Daniel. The exit is already close.

When I came to the very bank of the river, the weight became so strong that I hardly took even ordinary steps. Turning back, I saw something. Two endless lines of creatures grabbed my legs, stopping me in place and not allowing me to jump over the river. Having discovered this, my brain began to search for a solution at an emergency pace. The remaining part of the crowd that did not engage in my containment began to run away from their comrades to destroy me. I noticed dragons in the distance. Of course, there is a reserve here, of course. Sighing, the realization came to me. All of them had previously been in this red river and suffered without being able to harm. What's stopping me from reminding them?

Gathering the last of my strength, I raised my right leg and turned around, sending many creatures into the river. A few people were able to keep their grip on my leg. Continuing the U-turn, I put my right foot on the ground with my back turned to the river and then made the same U-turn with my left foot. The success was repeated again and in the end there were at most a dozen creatures clinging to my legs. Ignoring them as an insignificant load, which they were, I took a small run-up and jumped forward across the river.

In flight, I felt some of them begin to slowly crawl up my. Turning sharply, I saw two griffins clutching my legs with their claws that were moving up me. The rest of the creatures seem to have fallen from my jump. In response to this, my two hands almost instinctively rose and fell on the heads of the birds. The griffin struck by the left hand was instantly deprived of its head and after a couple of moments fell down, unlike its more fortunate counterpart. My right hand, exhausted by the active use of magic, could not hit the griffin properly and could only injure its beak. Taking advantage of the opportunity, he climbed slightly higher and to my surprise, instead of attacking, he stuck his claws into my pocket. While I was confused, the griffin abruptly pulled out the red crystal that was the eye of the skeleton and detached himself from me, jumping down. What for? Not clear.

After a couple of moments, I decided to focus on landing so as not to fall face first into the mud as before. Looking at the ground, I was able to roughly determine the distance to the ground as I fell. Thirty feet - press your knees to your chest. Fifteen feet-get ready to land on your toes. Colliding with the ground, I quickly did a somersault forward, softening the pain from the fall. Finally, turning around, I saw a crowd stopped by the banks of the river and dragons who were struggling to get to me through the air. Smiling, I turned back to the exit and ran to the stairs from hell.

On the way to the stairs, I felt myself and my pockets. There was only one crystal left in the left pocket. Most of the books fell out, but about five or six remained under the clothes. Better than nothing. When I reached the top of the stairs, I sighed happily realizing that there was very little left until the end of the way. Without looking back at the abandoned hell, I took a step forward and stopped for a moment. The whole wall was littered with small holes. Did my magic reach all the way here along the lines? In any case, looking up, I saw my last trials. Lift.

I reached for the key that was still embedded in the wall and released the magical tentacles. Only one tentacle came out of the hand and was able to stretch only a few feet before dissolving. Misfortunes. I had no time to start thinking about a way out of a bad situation when I felt the approach of several dragons. Misfortunes never come alone.

I jumped up quickly and when I saw that I wasn't even getting close, I stuck my left hand into the wall. The stone crumbled under my force, without rebirth and allowed me to create a good ledge for myself. I put my hand on the edge of the ledge and sighed, pushed off with my hand and feet, going even higher. Not gaining the right height, I stuck my hand into the wall again and took a short break. My whole body was sweating due to the local heat and general fatigue. My right hand was shaking so much that I was unable to use it. Suddenly, a dragon flew into the hole and quickly looked around and found me. Since he was too big to get into the hole completely, he began to make bubbling sounds that bothered me so much.

Growling, I jumped away from the wall towards the exit while the fire roared out the fire. In the air, my body reflexively stretched forward to avoid the approaching fire and reach my destination. I felt the warmth brushing my legs for a moment, but the next moment it was gone. After a few seconds, my exhausted brain understood the situation. I landed on my stomach right at the gate covered with ash. A stream of fire raged behind me, which could no longer reach me.

I slowly rolled over onto my back, inhaling and exhaling in an attempt to regain my strength. It feels like a big piece has been torn off from me. Damn lines. Of course it was powerful, but it only goes along the lines. The very lines that encircle all the living, allowing me to see the enemy without looking. In fact, this is a deadly, expensive and ineffective trap. Yes, it chopped up an entire squadron of dragons, but I'm sure it was just a lucky accident. Conclusion:Or figure out how to increase efficiency or forget about the existence of such an ability.

You underestimate. Maybe it has a huge potential. The potential that alone can bring you to perfection. This should not be forgotten. On the contrary, it is necessary to use and develop as often as possible.

Slowly, after thinking it over, I turned over again, this time on my stomach, and propping myself up with my left hand, I slowly got up. After taking the final few breaths in and out, I looked back expecting to see the key hanging on the wall. But there was nothing there. Outraged, I slowly began to walk to the edge of the cliff, hoping that the dragon still sitting there would not have time to react. When I reached the edge, I lowered my head only to be instantly met by a stream of fire. No, he has time to react.

Okay, we took out everything we could. We return to the garrison.

I made a sharp U-turn and went to the exit, letting the slightly torn coat fly away. After passing through the gate, I turned my head to the side where the bag was lying and quickly hung it over my shoulder. After making sure that everything was fine, I started walking up the stairs. As I walked to the exit, I walked close to the wall so as not to fall. After passing through the gate, I tried to throw off the ashes from myself and my clothes, which turned out to be almost completely unsuccessful. Seeing the lack of results, I sighed and slowly walked up the stairs away from the heat. As I ascended, a thought was spinning in my head. Maybe, just maybe Flying has been right. Maybe I need to cause a little less horror. It would be nice to at least bother to wash. Even just soaking your hair with water will not be so bad.

Crybaby, does some idiot have the right to say what's wrong with you?

"No it doesn't. No one has the right. But is it really normal to cause fear in others? Is it okay to talk about yourself just to scare someone? Is my honesty bullying?" I asked myself, thinking out loud.

We're not talking about phantom normality, crybaby. Norms are determined by a soulless, useless and vile mass called society. Your task is to achieve perfection and destroy this mass. Perfection is above society and, accordingly, defies morality and norms. Being NOT normal is in your true state.

"Really? I used to be normal, I guess. At least I didn't cause terror, irritation and rage in everyone around me. Maybe. " I muttered uncertainly.

Yes. And you were also a nobody at that time. You were beaten and you endured. You were humiliated, and you were silent. You were ordered, and you did it. Just a rag that can absorb pain and cry at night. And you know what? Without striving for perfection and the adjustments that follow it that keep you whole, you will become exactly the same. Nothing has changed since that moment. NOT a drop.

For a second I stopped leaning against the wall and thought. Maybe there is a balance somewhere? Maybe it's possible to be yourself at the same time and somehow look normal? I do not know, sometimes to say something at least neutral about me, for example.

And what are you going to say? Name at least one thing about yourself that another person will call at least neutral.

In response to my own question, I could not give any answer. Experience shows that talking even about the banal love of meat is not particularly welcome. At least in this environment. Telling a life story is also not an option. I doubt that many people will appreciate the fact that I have always solved the overwhelming number of conflicts by violence or flight in early childhood. Why can't people just admit that this is the most effective and universal way to solve problems? I meant violence, not flight.

Because they are as perfect as from the Milky Way to the Condor. You're up to perfection as from the north pole to the south. Far away but not even close as far as them.

After standing in place for a while, I slowly nodded to myself before going up the stairs. Yes, I'm definitely closer to Perfection than they are. You just need to make a few more jerks and you can rest. That's when you can think about how not to scare others. Until then? Study, study and study again.

By the time I finished thinking, I had almost walked all the way up the stairs. Compared to the heat at low levels, this area is a real refrigerator. Climbing another step, I staggered and fell forward, sprawling on the steps. After a few moments of rest, my eyes opened and I saw that four books had fallen out from under my clothes. Quickly feeling myself, I realized one unpleasant thing. These are all the books I have left. The rest is most likely lost. Was it really worth it?

Sure. The fog alone in conjunction with the explosion is worth something. The most important thing is not to show these books to anyone. And in general, put the books in the bag. What else do you need it for?

Sighing, I slowly got up and grabbed the books and threw them into the bag before closing it. After dealing with books, my legs carried me further to the exit. During the hike, I could feel the furious gaze on me and my body aching exhaustion. Passing by Cerberus, being unable to restrain my curiosity, I looked in the direction where the dog had been lying earlier. As expected, after the fight with me, he decided to sleep, despite the fact that this is shirking duties. Although who would expect discipline from a huge three-headed dog?

Grinning a little in response to my own remark, I turned away from Cerberus and continued walking forward. The gate to Tartarus that I opened let in a thin strip of light calling me to him like a moth lamp. Slowly, forgetting the pain, I started walking faster, burning with the desire to get out. When the gate was within my reach, my hand reflexively reached for it and opened it with a sharp movement.

A wave of light and cold air rushed over me, making me smile slightly. The sight of the tree, though devoid of foliage, only reinforced my joy. Looking up, my eyes widened at the sight of a pleasant sight in the form of a dream almost completely gone beyond the horizon. Of course, I didn't stay in hell for so long, but some part of me was very nervous from being there. As if a small part is still afraid of death.

In any case, it's time to return to the garrison. Go ahead before it gets too dark.

" Wash up first. Even a little sitting in the river will be an order of magnitude better hygiene than usual. " I said to myself before slowly walking forward along the way remembering the road to the river. You just need to walk along the cliff, pass by the castle and go forward. If I remember correctly, there is a river there.

While I was walking to the river, there were some doubts on the corners of my mind. If I don't work, then I'm lazy. If I'm lazy, I degrade. If I degrade, I lose progress. Losing progress means moving away from perfection. But I was able to partially suppress these thoughts. For the first time in a long time, if not at all, I'm thinking about something and just want it for no particular reason. Like a child watching a toy and wants it just because he wants it. Without logic, reasons and arguments. Just one short phrase: I want to.

With each step, the nature around me became more lively and the layer of snow became more dense. Although I'm not complaining. Cold is always better than heat and winter is better than summer. It would be nice to slightly shift the orbit of the planet to cancel summer or at least make it colder.

"Okay, this is a little too much. Even for me." I said to myself, shaking my head as I continued to walk towards the cherished goal. I devoted a moment looking at the castle that I almost missed. Maybe go in and take another bite out of the wolf.

No, it won't work. During the time you didn't go there, the meat most likely deteriorated badly. I still don't understand why you hunted on the outskirts of the forest instead of coming here. Was it really so important for you to provide a complete rest for Rising?

In response to my own question, I just nodded, continuing to walk forward to the river and admire the surroundings. Eventually, I got to the frozen river. The ice covering the surface of the river beautifully reflected the light of the setting sun, slightly blinding me. Standing at the shore, I stopped for a second looking at my reflection. Her hair was completely matted, her skin was pale and her right face and neck were covered with blood.

What are you going to do now, crybaby? In any case, you only have one set of clothes.

I instantly raised my foot and a powerful stomp forced into the cracks to pass through the ice. After the second stomp, the number of cracks increased significantly and the solid ice on the river turned into separate pieces. With my hands, I moved the floating pieces of ice slightly, freeing up space for myself. Then, taking a deep breath, I climbed into the vacant space right in my clothes and sat down on the bottom. Fortunately, near the shore, the bottom was low enough for my head and neck to stick out from under the water.

You can't be serious. What will you do when you're done sitting in the water? Will you go naked?

"No, I will walk around in wet clothes. Although nudism is also an option." I said, taking deep breaths in and out to distract myself from the cold. At some point, a cold wind howled through the space, making my teeth chatter. Despite this, I took some water in my palms and splashed it in my face. The water was running down my face back into the river, taking quite a bit of blood with it. Seeing the ineffectiveness of this method, I closed my eyes and with a sharp movement dipped my head into the water.

What are you going to do, crybaby, if you get sick here? Or will you catch any frostbite at all?

"I'll be patient. I still suffer from allergies every spring and I don't even know what it is. You can walk around with snot and watery eyes a little earlier. Nothing will change significantly. " I answered myself after I pulled my head out of the water. Seeing the reflection, my eyes began to study it reflexively. Most of the blood was washed off my face, my nose was red from the cold and my hair took on an even more chaotic tangled look. It's probably time to get a haircut.

Maybe you'll go to the spa again?

"Why not? You can write a letter to Luna in a month and demand a well-deserved salary. You can use the money to go and clean yourself up. The search for balance has been shelved, but it is still important to smell at least a little better than a garbage dump. Probably the only thing in which I agree with my father. " I said, smiling a little at the last thought. It will be at least interesting to come to the spa for the first time.

No, you're not going to the spa. I'll repeat it again. There is perfection, and there is everything else. Until perfection is achieved, it is not worth being distracted by something else, with rare exceptions. And going to the spa is not.

I closed my eyes and leaned my head back, letting the water drip onto the snow. Of course, Perfection is important, and this is above all. But I just want to do what I want for the first time in my life without logical reasons. Not for survival, not for profit, not for anything. Just a wish.

An abomination.

Sighing, I looked at the setting sun and said to myself: "I have to think about it."

POV Rising Moon

I nervously looked at the forest into which the captain had gone from his position from the roof of the tower. It was a little difficult to get here in armor, but everything was possible. I think the captain will approve that I chose such a good position for observation. The sun has already set, plunging the whole neighborhood into darkness and marking the beginning of the active time of day. Fortunately, at least here I was lucky and I can see well in the dark. I wonder what the district looks like from the captain's point of view now? He probably can't see anything.

I gasped sharply realizing my own assumption. Maybe the captain got lost in the woods? What if he's in danger? What if he was attacked by some mercenaries again? All these questions and others swirled in my head as my eyes widened with increasing panic.

Why are you panicking? No, no, it's illogical. A few days ago, he regularly went to the forest and for a much longer period of time. No, no, everything should be fine. The captain is strong and smart. I went to the forest with him more than once while we were at the old place. He's fine.

"He's fine." I said consoling myself. Calming down a little, I looked at the armor that I put next to me. In the current conditions, they are so cold that it is impossible to wear. A few days ago it was still tolerable, but now it is not. I looked down at my comrades with some envy. They stood quietly on the street, chatting about something with each other and showed no signs of discomfort. Why can't I do what everyone can?

Sighing, I decided to switch to something less depressing. Looking at the forest, my eyes widened at the sight of a familiar bipedal figure with a bag on his shoulder. Seeing this, I jumped up abruptly and spread my wings. But then he stopped. How will the captain react to the fact that I will be without armor and without weapons?

"I don't think he'll approve," I muttered before quickly putting on my armor. First, I took the wings of the main part of the armor, which is a single plate with a hole through which you can stick your head. Slowly trying to endure the cold, I put on the main part and in a hurry put on a helmet. I stood there for a second, trying to control the trembling all over my body. Taking a deep breath, I jumped off the roof of the tower and spread my wings. Due to the weight of the armor, a normal dive did not work out and I had to flap my wings hard to stay in the air. I don't think I'll ever get used to the weight of this armor.

Having flown close enough to the captain, my eyes caught that he stopped in place and looked at me leaning against the wall of the nearest building. Smiling nervously and waving my hoof, I began to slowly descend to the ground. A few moments later, my hooves landed on the ground, pressing into the snow. I shivered slightly from the extra cold.

"You're shaking all over. I didn't think that taking into account the fur, you ponies can freeze so much. What's wrong, Rising?" The captain asked, raising an eyebrow. I opened my mouth to reply, but then looked at him more closely. His hair looked disheveled and damp. Water dripped from the torn clothes in various places, the nose turned red and the skin looked somehow pale. And he was even slightly chattering his teeth from the cold.

"I can ask the same about you." I answered after finishing the inspection and looking into the captain's eyes.

In response, he grinned and replied, confusing me: "This happens when you swim in an ice hole."

"Why?" I asked instantly, unable to suppress my curiosity in time. Why climb into the ice hole in the already cold weather?

"I thought it was worth doing a little hygiene. Admit it, I haven't looked and smelled presentable lately." The captain replied, baffling me. What am I supposed to say here? Should I admit it? Or should I challenge it? The first may offend the captain. And the second is a lie.

While I was thinking nervously, the captain snapped his fingers in front of my nose, bringing me out of my thoughts and said: "In any case, I washed up. Bad, crooked, without soap, but washed. And judging by your shaking, you're freezing just from the local weather. It's weird considering you have fur, but okay. Will you come with me to the garrison or do you have your own business?"

I smiled in response to the fact that the captain deprived me of a dilemma and to his proposal. Without hesitation, I nodded at the captain's suggestion. In response, he nodded and walked away from the wall towards the garrison. I quickly realized what was going on and went side by side with the captain.

After a few seconds I looked up at him and asked: "So, did you find something?"

"Yes, I found it. It was hard, but success was achieved. Unfortunately, most of the books were lost on the way out. But something turned out to be saved." The captain answered, putting me in a stupor.

"Books? Lost on the way out? Is it hard for you? " I asked, hoping that the captain would tell me more.

" Yes books. Yes, most were lost during the exit. And yes, it was hard. " The captain replied, making me tense up a little. Usually, he immediately says everything at once and answers questions that haven't even been asked yet. But nothing like that now.

"What happened?" I asked, yielding to my curiosity.

"Why are you so interested in my condition and what is happening to me?" The captain asked, stopping abruptly and looking at me. There was annoyance, incomprehension and even some anger in his gaze. Under this look, I feel like a bug and instinctively try to look smaller.

You won't be able to leave. Come on, Rising, you can say it.

I took a deep breath and answered: "I feel indebted to you."

"Debtor for what?" the captain asked firmly, continuing to press.

"Don't you see?" I asked, bowing my head in embarrassment, "You trained me as your soldier. You helped me feel one hundred percent safe with someone for the first time in my life. I will say more, even if temporarily, you are putting confidence in me that I have never felt in my life by my presence alone. You saved my life after all! "

The captain paused for a moment before asking in a much softer voice: " Why do you feel unsafe around others?"

I looked away and asked quietly: "Can I not answer?"

The captain took a deep breath and replied: "Okay. When you're ready, tell me. Just know that I won't judge. "

I smiled a little in response and said: " That's what I'm grateful for. "

For a second there was silence in the air, interrupted only by the howling of the wind, but it was interrupted by the words of the captain who again began to walk to the garrison: " Let's go. "

I nodded and followed the captain, trying to endure the cold. My mouth opened to repeat my last question, but the captain interrupted me: "And I'm sorry, Rising, but I won't tell you about what I encountered. Right now I'm not ready to tell you and I'm not sure what you're ready to hear."

After a couple of seconds of thinking with a worried expression on my face, I decided not to argue with the captain and nodded. Following the captain, I couldn't take my eyes off his pale skin. It can't be something ordinary. Something has happened. But perhaps his unwillingness to tell is fair. I didn't tell him something of my own, he didn't tell me something of his own. Sounds fair. Maybe.

While I was thinking, we managed to get to the garrison. Sighing, the captain turned to me and said: "I don't know about you, but I'm going to bed. Or I'll go study what I could find. I haven't chosen yet. Wake me up in a couple of hours so I can schedule the next shift, okay?"

How will I determine the time?

In response, I nodded, deciding to postpone solving problems for later, which caused the captain to smile. While he was walking to the tower, I was thinking about how to spend time. After a few seconds, I looked at the tower and a thing came to me that I hadn't noticed before. There is a really good view from the roof of the tower.

Spreading my wings, I jumped up and started flapping them quickly. With some difficulty and effort, I was able to reach the roof and landing on it quickly took off my armor. I sighed, enjoying the feeling of cold metal removed from the skin and casting a glance at the sky. Hundreds, thousands of stars hung in the sky, and in the center of this picture was a large moon that took the shape of a crescent. Looking at the sky, I tried to fix one thought in my head.

I have to tell the captain. Sooner or later.