Tricks of the Heartby Spyder27ChaptersCheckmateAll It TakesA New NormalAll the Nice ThingsCheckmateChapter I: Checkmate The fall semester is always a time where students are stressed out and overworked, depending on which classes they are enrolled in. Some professors are pretty lax about their assignments and what rules they enforce, but this seems to be pretty rare the farther along you get. Money is another issue, but I qualified for enough scholarships to attend Canterlot City University, thankfully. After the Battle of the Bands at Canterlot High, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do with my life. I mean, what was a siren supposed to do…? I either had to adapt or suffer. So, I decided to enroll and try to get some sort of degree… To my surprise, Sunset Shimmer was also enrolled in this university, which made things… difficult. At least for the first couple of semesters. Today, I almost find it humorous that I hated her back then. I’m currently in my junior year and I probably wouldn’t have made it this far without Sunset’s help. She was always pushing to get to know me more and to take some of our general education requirements together. I guess she sort of… rubbed off on me. She seemed genuinely sorry that she took our magic away and she was always trying to lend a helpful hand. She became someone I could rely on. Even with our bad history, she was willing to help where she could and didn’t seem to let my spiteful attitude keep her from smiling. Maybe that’s why we became friends in the first place. Her curious optimism and her positive outlook on life, convincing me that even a siren can find her place in this world without magic. Now, the two of us spend nearly every day together. I admit that Shimmer is a little… annoying at times. With her constant pressure to be good rather than bend the rules a little bit. That’s something I find humorous to mess with though. To try and make Sunset break a few rules. She successfully “reformed” me, so I should have some fun in making Sunset be the bad girl in exchange, right? Regardless, Sunset is a… good friend. She and I are planning on playing chess tonight if everything goes well. Until then, I have to study my physics textbook. Walking down the hallway, the vague smell of dust and dirt reminds me of the state of the dorms. This university doesn’t really invest much into the lower dorms, leading to the carpets being reduced to shreds and the paint on the walls chipping off. My classes for the day have ended so far, but that doesn’t mean my night will be any less stressful. I don’t look forward to studying all the material assigned for my classes, but it has to be done. At least Sunset and I can spend some time together to relax before the weekend. Actually, I should probably call the girls tomorrow… It’s been way too long since we’ve talked. They’re attending a different college, but at least they can look out for each other. We can see each other during Christmas too, so we’ll have quite a bit of time to catch up, but a call would still be nice. Quickly making my way up the stairs, the echo of my footsteps bounces around the walls. The thing I’m looking forward to the most is getting to sleep tonight. All I have to do is write notes down for a few chapters, play a couple games with Sunset and then I can let myself shut my eyes under my blanket. Opening the door to my floor, a slight smile comes to my lips, thinking about how good it will feel to finally go to sleep. I’ve been awake for close to sixteen hours now, so I will definitely enjoy a good night’s sleep after all of this. As tempting as it is to take a nap in the middle of the afternoon, I know I wouldn’t end up getting to my notes before tomorrow. That’s something I can’t afford. Bringing my keys out of my bag, I quickly slide my dorm key into the door, unlocking it with ease. To my surprise, the lights in my room are already on, making me raise my eyebrow. Looking towards my bed, the reason for the lights immediately becomes clear to me. Lying down, her fiery hair spills out all across my pillow, her eyes looking towards me with a smirk, holding a box on top of her chest. Despite her restful position, she’s still wearing her shoes, looking like she either just came in or she just didn’t care to get more comfortable. “I told you that you could make yourself at home, you know,” I tell her with a slight roll of my eyes, amused at the whole situation. Just because she has a key to my room doesn’t mean I expected her to use it. Well, under emergencies, sure. I would hope she uses it. “I know, but I just got here,” Sunset responds with a giggle, sitting up on my bed with slightly messy hair. “I didn’t really expect you to be home so quickly, though.” Locking the door behind me, I shake my head with a smile, putting my textbook down on my table. “You should know my class schedule at this point,” I tease her with a smirk before pulling my coat off, kicking my shoes off and feeling relieved to finally be free of them. “What’s with the box?” Despite my curiosity, I actually want an answer as to why she’s here. We’re supposed to hang out later tonight, making now the optimal time to get some studying done. “It’s just a chess kit,” Sunset explains, putting the box down on the bed before brushing her hair away from her face. “About tonight…” Her previously happy and smug demeanor is now replaced by a nervous expression, a slight chuckle coming from her lips. “My plans have changed.” Changed…? Raising my eyebrow, I slowly approach the opposite side of the bed, sitting down in front of Sunset with a weary look. “Care to elaborate?” My question only seems to make Sunset a little more nervous, her eyes avoiding mine for a few moments. “Well, Flash wants to go to a party and he asked if I could go with him.” Without wasting a second, a small sigh leaves my lips, already knowing exactly where this is going. Her boyfriend often takes up a lot of her time, so I shouldn’t be surprised, but she and I planned this a week in advance. He couldn’t have asked her before the day of the party? Damn it… “I know, I know. I’m sorry… But I know how much this means to you since we’ve both been pretty busy.” Busy is kind of the wrong word. It’s actually due to her spending her time with Flash that we haven’t been able to hang out for two weeks, but I digress. “So, I thought that maybe we could play chess now and all? That way, we can still hang out before I go to the party.” Looking up at Sunset, her hands now hold the box up, smiling as well as she can to try and appease me. As much as I support her relationship with Flash, I can’t help but feel slightly annoyed that he takes up all the time of the one friend I have in college. The least he could have done is tell her about it before today so that both of us could have planned around it. Now, I’m basically told that if we don’t play now, we won’t be able to later. If I do play with her now, I will be up half the night studying. “You’re sure you can’t skip the party…? Just this once?” I ask her with a sigh, averting my gaze to the blanket. Bringing my hand to my hair, I can’t help but feel a bit… upset. I know that a relationship is supposed to be a lot of give and take and I respect Sunset for that, but I also feel like I’m at the losing end of this whole situation. I mean, god… She’s my only friend. I know I hated her before, but is it so wrong of me to want to spend time with her? I guess Flash doesn’t even think about that aspect. “Flash and I haven’t really been seeing eye-to-eye recently, so I kind of need to go. I want to spend time with him so that he knows I still care about him,” Sunset tells me with a tender voice, trying to be caring about both my needs and his. “I miss hanging out with you too, so I decided to come here a bit earlier. I hope we can still play…?” Despite how easy it is to feel rotten about the whole ordeal, it’s hard to stay angry when I look at her, clearly trying to do her best. I guess it’s a good thing in the end that she can even spare this time. If I play now, then I will be a lot more tired when I finally go to bed… But it would be worth it, I suppose… I mean, being able to play at all is a good thing. “Fine. But next time, you need to cancel on Flash instead of me.” Taking the box out of her hands, I open it with a small smile, happy that we can spend this time together. “Deal~” All It TakesChapter II: All It Takes The farther I get along, the more my mind begins to melt away. All the terms and math in physics never fails to confuse me, which is only made worse by my exhaustion. Numbers and characters, all of which need to be explained through steps. If the textbook takes it easy on me, I won’t have to account for friction on most of these problems. If I do, then I will be up until six in the morning. At that point, it might as well be an all-nighter. God, I hope not… I’ve already been up for a while. I just want to sleep at this point, but the chapters can’t study themselves… By extension, the exams won’t finish themselves either, so yeah. Back when I had my magic, I didn’t really have to worry about that, but now I’ve been reduced to a mortal who has to hope they will pass an exam… But I’m also happy now… I have friends and I have fun. I guess it’s a fair trade at the end of the day. Running my fingers through my hair, I sigh quietly, closing my eyes for a moment to rest from the boring details of each page. I would mark the book’s pages with highlighter, but since this is a rental, I would be fined for it. The university takes it pretty seriously to keep their books in a good condition. So, the best I can do is take notes off of each chapter. My hand cramps easily from all the notes that I deem important, but it’s better to be safe than sorry, right? I mean, I’m not even sure what the professor will put on the exam… Putting the textbook down, I slowly stand up, stretching my arms and back. Sitting here all day has pretty much made my whole body feel stiff. Looking at the window, only darkness slips through the blinds, making me pull my phone out of my pocket to check the time. Even though it’s only ten, it feels like it’s three in the morning… Walking towards the counter in my room, I look inside some of the overhead cupboards for something to snack on. Unsurprisingly, nothing other than some crackers is present. I haven’t gone grocery shopping in a while and the lack of a meal plan only worsens my problem. Of course, everything is closed at this time as well, except for some pretty bad fast food. Despite my disdain for them, my stomach is telling me I need to eat or sleep. Since sleeping isn’t on the table right now, the best thing I can do is try and get something to eat. Grabbing my keys from the counter, I walk over to my shoes before I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket. The only people who text me are Sunset and the girls, but I highly doubt it would be Aria and Sonata at this time of the night. They would probably be asleep, trying to get to bed early due to Aria’s insomnia. Pulling the phone out of my pocket, I look at the notification, seeing Sunset’s profile picture. Her happy smile with a bright horizon behind her. I think we went to the beach when I took this picture. She asked me to take a picture due to her wanting to remember the day, but I ended up keeping it in my gallery as well. Tapping the notification, my eyes widen almost immediately. “Can you pick me up? It’s an emergency,” her message explains to me in frank and short detail, making me feel slightly worried. Sunset never used the word “emergency” with me before… What could make her use that word…? “Are you alright?” I quickly type into my phone, slipping on my shoes as fast as I can. No response is sent by the time I grab my coat and make it to the door, feeling my heart beat a little faster. What could be an emergency…? “I’ll be there in a second. Send me the address.” Food can wait… Whatever is going on with Sunset will have to take priority. ====================================================== Pulling up to a street corner at a park, my eyes look around my surroundings, trying to make sure I’ve made it to the right location. Loud sounds and bright lights come from a house up the hill away from the park, making this area seem more peaceful and serene in comparison. Sunset said she was at a party, so why would she be here…? All she sent was a location and failed to explain what was wrong in her texts, seeming like she would rather not talk about it. Looking to my left, I see a bench under one of the streetlights, bright red and yellow hair being the only thing I can focus on. Her head is aimed towards the ground, casting her face in shadows while she sits there. Without wasting a second, I put my car in park, getting out of it and locking it behind me. What happened at this party…? Sunset is usually so happy and outgoing, so seeing her slumped in this bench makes me feel pretty worried. Quickly, I make my way towards Sunset, the sound of my footsteps being one of the only sounds here other than the music from up the hill. “Sunset?” I say carefully, trying to call her name to get her attention. Her head slowly tilts upwards, looking into my eyes with tears streaming down her face. From how red her eyes look and her puffy cheeks, it looks like she’s been crying for a while… “H-hey, Adagio,” Sunset weakly states, her cracked voice showing how little energy she has as her hands wipe away some of her tears. Without saying another word, she slowly stands up from her seated position, walking towards me with her head hanging low. “Can we go?” she asks me without making eye contact, my mind thinking a thousand thoughts per second. Why is she crying…? What made her cry? How can I fix this…? “What happened?” I ask her slowly, bringing my hands to her shoulders. This girl that I used to call my enemy has tears running down her face and I can’t help but feel worried. She is one of my only friends… She was there for me when no one else was, even when I didn’t want her to be there. I gave her so much hostility and she gave me nothing but kindness in return. Why do I feel so angry that something made her cry like this…? “It’s n-nothing. It’s just Flash.” Her voice is still weak, barely speaking her words without letting her walls break again. Her boyfriend again…? God damn it… What did he do? What could he have done to make Sunset cry like this? In front of people as well? “What did he do, Sunset?” I ask her carefully, wrapping my arms around her back and pulling her into my embrace. Despite the fact that she doesn’t return the hug, I can tell that Sunset enjoys this small moment of peace. “Please. Tell me what’s wrong, Sunset,” I whisper quietly, holding onto her as tightly as I can. This girl who has always been here for me makes me feel so helpless when she cries… What kind of cruel fate is it that she has to cry? I mean, she’s done nothing but do her best in this world. She’s made mistakes in the past, but she’s made up for them tenfold by now. Sunset is the person that deserves this the least in the world… A small part of me can’t help but question why I feel so angry at this situation, but another part of me knows that Sunset doesn’t deserve this. Why couldn’t she have had a good night at the party…? Shaking slightly, Sunset begins to cry into my shoulder, her arms returning the embrace I’ve given her slowly. She desperately holds onto me, trying to find some sort of support. I won’t let her fall… I’ll be here. I would do anything to try and make up for these tears. “H-he cheated on me…” The pit of fire in my heart burns even brighter immediately after hearing her words… My mind can’t seem to think rationally… All I can focus on is the crying Sunset in my arms and the person who broke her down to this level. The guy she tried so hard to appease and be there for is the same person who throws her to the curb the very next day? The same guy she tried so damn hard to show him that she loved him and that he really mattered to her? This guy made us have to cancel and rework so many of our plans to hang out and I always tried to be understanding. She was in a relationship and I wanted to support her for that. He took advantage of not only our time, her hard work, but also her heart…? What in tartarus makes him think he gets the right to treat Sunset like she’s trash? The one friend I have after the Battle of the Bands… “I’m not letting this night end like this,” I whisper instinctively, not controlling the words that come out of my mouth. Letting go of Sunset, my body instantly turns towards the loud house, walking in its direction. “A-Adagio, don’t,” Sunset weakly calls out for me, still trying to protect him. Even if someone completely screws her over, Sunset still somehow has the drive to respect them and protect them. It’s an honorable quality… One I don’t have… My body is moving on its own at this point… Every cell of my body knows what I want to do. Unlike Sunset, I lack the self-control to stop myself from doing this. Why should I? This is the right thing to do. He took Sunset’s kindness and threw it away. He took her smile and made it disappear completely… Nothing would make me happier than to make him realize just how much he screwed up. I can’t help but clench my fists, thousands of thoughts running through my mind easily. If I was still a siren, I could kill him in a thousand different ways… Every one of them involves pure force rather than my magic… Someone like him doesn’t deserve the respect that a death involving magic would entail. Then again, the magic in Equestria could make him feel the fire I feel inside my heart. Every new option in my mind is better than the last… What scum would fail to realize how hard their girlfriend worked to be with them and make sure they both could be together…? Walking through the front lawn, I quickly open the door to the house, the music only getting louder as a result. The whole place smells strongly of alcohol as everyone dances and socializes with one another. Neon lights project onto the walls and laughter can easily be heard. Despite all the distracting details, my mind remains focused on one thing… Walking through the rooms quickly, my eyes scan the crowds, looking for the blue-haired dickhead that ruined Sunset’s day. Everyone seems to be enjoying their night, not a care in the world as Sunset’s world falls apart… Why should they celebrate as Sunset breaks down in tears in the cold night air? It’s all so sickening… Why do they deserve the good night that she should be given? Is there no justice in this world? It’s funny… Here I am, looking for justice against someone when I was the evil one just a few years ago. She deserves some justice… Walking out into the back yard, a big table full of drinks is to my right and a large pool is directly in front of me. Lights inside the pool make it visible to see inside the water, but the person standing by the pool captures more of my attention. Seeing his blue hair makes my blood boil, grabbing a cup of punch instantly. My feet quickly make me walk forward, my eyes centered on him. His eyes finally look towards me, a surprised expression overtaking his face. “Oh, Adagio-” Before he can finish his sentence, my hand instinctively throws forwards the cup, splashing the liquid in his face. It feels so damn sweet to see this bastard get a little of what he deserves. But it’s not enough… Bringing my hand up quickly, I strike the side of his face, causing him to fall into the pool. The water will probably ruin some of his clothes, but he deserves all of this and more. Coming to the surface, Flash takes a big gulp of air, struggling to keep up with what just happened to him. “What the hell was that?!” he yells, making everyone look in our direction. I can feel the fire roar in my heart, my lips twitching slightly. The anger inside me desperately tries to find some way to release itself, my eyes staring down at the trash floating in the water. “You have the audacity to cheat on your loving girlfriend at the party YOU invited her to!” I yell in response, the fire in my eyes never failing to go away. Every cell of my body screams at me to hurt him more, but I manage to hold myself back, knowing that the humiliation he will suffer for this will probably hurt more than the physical pain right now. “Trash like you hurt the genuinely good people in this world and I hope you get what you deserve.” Turning around, I attempt to walk away before I hear Flash laugh from the pool. Everyone else around us is deathly quiet, watching this whole interaction. “You’re one to talk! You’re the most evil one of us all, isn’t that right?” Staring back down at him, I can feel my body move towards the pool, fully prepared to harm him even more… Pulling myself back, I can’t help but grimace at Flash, wanting to rip the skin from his skull. “If you EVER come near Sunset again, I will kill you. That isn’t a threat.” Bringing my hand down, I compose my face, smiling down at him slightly. “It’s a warning.” Without wasting a second more on his pathetic ass, I turn around and see Sunset standing inside the house, a surprised expression on her face that keeps her from crying for now. Quickly walking towards her, I take her hand in mine, walking towards the front of the house with every part of me telling me to turn back and do something more to Flash. “Let’s go.” ===================================================== The door slowly swings open in front of us, not a thing changed inside my room since I left it. The soft yellow light of the lamp beside my bed is the only thing illuminating the walls of my room, making it look later than it actually is. Slowly walking inside, I guide Sunset in and close the door behind her. “Why are we here, Adagio?” she quietly asks me, her eyes once again avoiding mine. The whole ride over here, Sunset was either crying or staring at the floor. No matter what someone could say to try and convince me otherwise, I don’t believe leaving her alone is the best course of action. I… don’t want to leave her alone… “I should go to my room,” her weak voice barely tells me, her hand rubbing her arm with her eyes looking like she could burst into tears at any moment. “I don’t want to leave you alone,” I speak honestly, unsure of what words will come out of my mouth. “You don’t deserve to be left alone on a night like tonight.” Her eyes close as soon as she hears my words, her fingers gripping her shoulder even tighter. “No, I-I do. I do deserve-” Without a moment passing by, my arms wrap around her weak body, pulling her close to me. Please don’t say that… Just hearing those words would break my spirit, throwing every ounce of hope inside me out the window. Why does the universe have to punish her? Why not me…? She doesn’t deserve to cry tonight… To feel so small and helpless. Can I really do nothing to help…? “Don’t say that,” I whisper to her, pressing my cheek against hers. At this point, even I don't even know what I’m doing. I don’t think Sunset and I have ever hugged this much, but most of it has been instinct… My heart just tells me what to do and my body follows, not bothering to ask my mind for input. “You’re worth so much, Sunset… Don’t let that asshole make you believe you’re worthless. Please.” I don’t know what to say at this point. Words just fall out of my mouth and I can’t help but pray that it all comes out alright. Feeling her soft hair in my hand, I feel a grimace come over my face, thinking of the person who hurt her. “I don’t want to leave you alone. So… I’m asking you to please stay. For tonight.” Looking her in the eye, a surprised look comes over her again, not a sound interrupting us. To completely break Sunset’s spirit… What could I even do to him to make him feel exactly what she feels…? A conflicted tone comes to Sunset’s tired eyes, her gaze briefly going to the door. Sunset wants to leave, but something’s stopping her from outright doing so… Maybe she knows how much she needs just a little company. “P-promise you don’t mind?” Sunset whispers to me, her face looking like she really needs someone to be here for her… A friend… Someone like me. I won’t let her down… “I promise.” Brushing the hair out of Sunset’s face, my mind feels like a blur, trying to come up with the next course of action. How can I help her from here? There’s nothing to do in my apartment other than sleep… “Could I have one of your beers?” Sunset asks me with a slight sniffle, wiping away a tear from her cheek and trying desperately to keep her walls up. A part of me can’t help but ask whether that’s a good idea at this time, but all doubt leaves my mind every time I look at her again… She needs something to distract herself, right…? “Of course, Sunset.” ===================================================== The silence that had once filled my room is gone now, being replaced by giggles and laughter. In Sunset’s attempt to try and calm herself down, she ended up drinking multiple of my beers from my fridge, making her giggle at some of the most basic jokes. Taking a big sip, Sunset hiccups slightly, leaning on my shoulder with a big smile on her face. “How big was the turtle at the zoo again~?” she asks me quickly, poking my shoulder with the can in her hand. I would try to tell her exactly how big this turtle is, but I only have one problem. We never went to the zoo together, so I have no idea what she’s talking about. “About the size of a car,” I say with a happy tone, playing into the story that is unfolding in her mind. Just seeing her smile like this makes me feel so much better. I know it’s probably temporary, but… is it wrong of me to want to see her happy…? She’ll have to deal with a massive headache tomorrow, but at least she will be able to forget about what happened for a little while. “Oh yeah!” she exclaims, giggling at my response as she holds onto my arm. “O-oh, Adagio~ Do you know how much bread a giraffe can eat?” she asks me, locking her eyes with my own. Even though it’s the alcohol that’s giving her this buzz, it’s nice to see a spark in her eyes again. Just being close to her and seeing her happy is… nice. “I’m not sure? How much?” I ask her quietly, preparing for some fact or punchline. Taking a deep breath, Sunset slowly leans in, pressing her forehead against my own and closing her eyes. “I don’t know~” she simply states, giggling at her seemingly funny punchline. Or lack of one. Her hand brings the can of beer up to the sky, leaning back as she looks up at the ceiling. Even when Sunset is sober and not heartbroken, she is never this carefree. She almost always has something on her mind that she’s stressing out about. To see her like this is honestly a breath of fresh air. It’s fun and it even takes my mind off of the upcoming exams. I hate to say it, but even I giggled at Sunset’s nonsensical joke. Not because I have been drinking too, but because I just enjoy being with her. She’s my only friend here… I wouldn’t touch a drop of alcohol when it comes to helping her out. “You know, I can’t remember what it’s like to have hooves,” she casually tells me with a slight hiccup, looking at her hand with an odd fascination. “Aren’t fingers… weird? I mean, they’re just parts of our limbs that let us grab things.” “Well, yeah. I can see what you mean,” I respond slowly, looking down at my own hand. I can remember what it was like to be a siren… I remember how my scales felt and how it was like to have hooves. I remember seeing was slightly different with a muzzle instead of a relatively flat face like humans have. That observation is accurate, but one I didn’t expect to come from a drunk Sunset. “But then again, hands are beautiful in a way. We can build things and destroy. We can hold things.” Turning to me slowly, her eyes connect with mine, a sparkling happiness in them. “Or hold the people we love. Isn’t that amazing?” Another hiccup comes from Sunset’s lips, but our eyes stay connected, her face oddly close to mine. In her drunken state, Sunset seemingly forgets about personal space and loves being close to someone else. I can’t say that this experience is unenjoyable for me though… Looking into those eyes that reflect the ocean remind me precisely why she’s a good friend. She’s reliable, trustworthy and most of all, stubborn. Even though I was pretty mean to her when she first tried to be my friend, she kept trying with that near limitless determination. Seeing Flash almost destroy that tonight makes me irrationally angry. That determination is what helped me be happy. Her confidence is what made me believe that I can still have a life, despite the loss of my magic. Gently, Sunset’s hand grabs onto my own, her smile widening slowly. “Like holding their hand~” Sunset’s other hand slowly drops the empty can onto the ground, leaning onto me with a slightly sleepy expression. Despite my mind telling me not to, I go along with her action, lying down on the bed and letting Sunset rest on top of me. The air is cool. Not a sound can be heard other than our breathing, Sunset’s stomach expanding against my body in a slow rhythm reminding me of her presence. Her hand holds onto mine, rubbing my thumb across the back of her hand slowly. I never realized how soft her skin is… She and I hardly hug at all, despite us being friends. From her displays with her other friends, she made me believe that hugging is like a ritual for friendships. I’ve hardly ever felt her hair other than tonight. All of that changed when Sunset got drunk. She was overly clingy and liked to hug me. She is probably the only person I don’t mind doing this with… My mind is so stubborn to keep up a certain reputation as the bad girl who doesn’t need help that I refuse to allow someone to hug me usually. But with her…? She somehow breaks me down to my most fundamental levels. She makes me feel like it’s alright to be vulnerable and when I see someone hurt her… I feel angry. Just like any friend would. “I take your kindness for granted, Adagio,” Sunset tells me with a soft hum, almost sounding like it’s a sober statement. “You’re so nice to me. You help me whenever I need it. You’re always trying to act tough, but you’re actually pretty soft.” Her eyes look up to me again, a happy smile dawning on her face. Why is it easy to get lost in someone else’s eyes? Is it everyone’s eyes or just hers? “Not just your hair or stuff. But your soul is soft too~” The warm light of the lamp is the only thing illuminating both of us, just dim enough to make someone feel tired. This same light is cast on her, making her look almost angelic. She deserves to feel happy tonight. No one should have the luxury of destroying her ego and happy nature like Flash did tonight. Slowly, Sunset’s hand reaches up to my face and cups my cheek, her face ever so close to mine. “You’re so… nice. Kind. Special. What would I do without you?” Sunset slowly asks me, getting closer to me. The heat of her breath spreads across my lips, my mind unsure how to handle the situation. My body is acting weird… Shocks of electricity go up my spine and I can’t quite control it. Even though it’s just Sunset, I can’t help but feel confused about this situation. Before I can say anything, Sunset places her lips against mine, a giant shock of electricity running through my body. Her hand never lets go of my own and the embrace lasts for what feels like an eternity. Why is she… kissing me…? Her lips feel so soft… I understand that she’s drunk, but… what would make her do this? We’re just friends and… and… Without giving me any chance to organize my thoughts, Sunset lets go of the kiss, quickly falling asleep in a drunken mess on my chest. Her closed eyes make her look so peaceful, despite the amount she drank. More importantly, the feeling of her lips remains on my mouth… The warm yellow light is the only thing that accompanies me now. My hand slowly strokes her hair, holding her close to me. That kiss was just a mistake on her part. She didn’t realize what she was doing and I should have stopped it. Yeah… We’ll still be friends by tomorrow morning… Reaching up to the lamp, I turn off the light, letting us rest in the peaceful darkness. By tomorrow, I’m sure she will be her old self. Everything will be fine and back to normal. Like nothing happened… Bringing my fingers to my lips, I try to rub the sensation away, laying my head on the pillow. Everything will be back to normal… A New NormalChapter III: A New Normal The warm light of the day slips through the cracks of the blinds, alerting everyone inside of the morning. In my room, there are only two people. Sunset. And me. I barely got any sleep last night. Maybe it was because my mind wanted to make sure Sunset is alright, but I’m not sure… No matter how hard I tried to think of bouncing sheep, my mind always strayed towards thoughts of Sunset. About the night before. About all the times we’ve shared together. I’ve never thought about her this much in the span of twenty-four hours, but here I am. Maybe I’m still mad at Flash… That could be the reason why. All through the night, I held Sunset close to me and stroked my fingers through her hair, trying to make sure she had a good sleep even if I didn’t. I couldn’t get my mind off of it… Off of that one thing. She was drunk and it meant nothing… So why does it feel like something…? Staring at the ceiling above me, I feel Sunset’s body move slightly more than she had all night. A groan comes from her lips, struggling to bring herself to reality. Through a lot of effort, she slowly pulls her head off my chest, squinting to look at her surroundings. “Good morning,” I tell her quietly, attracting her attention. “Adagio? Why does my… head hurt so much?” she barely asks me before bringing her hand to her forehead, whimpering at the headache. The buzz has worn off, leaving only a miserable hangover. “Was I… sleeping on you?” Her eyes are still squinting as she tries to sit up, holding her head all the while. A couple more groans come out of her as I move up beside her, stretching my arms. “Well, you kinda initiated it. After you drank everything from my fridge.” Sunset’s eyes instantly look over at me, making her wince at the sudden move. Nonetheless, surprise is written all across her face. “You want proof? Look around us,” I tell her while moving my arm out in front of us, presenting the empty beer cans galore. A blush comes to Sunset’s face, her hand rubbing her forehead before looking at me again. “I’m sorry… I didn't mean to drink so much.” Taking another look at the cans all around her, a loud sigh exits her lungs. “What happened…?” “You don’t remember?” Sunset shakes her head to my question, slowly placing her hand on the bed and pushing herself up, wobbly standing in front of my bed. “I can’t remember what happened after I started drinking, if that’s what you’re asking. I still remember what…” she stops herself quickly, looking down at the floor quietly, “he did…” I was almost hoping that she would have forgotten that as well… But I suppose that would mean I would have to reopen the wound by telling her. In my opinion, it’s better that she’s no longer with him, but I know she genuinely cared about him. Even if I wasn’t the biggest fan of how he would take our time away from us, she tried so hard to make him happy and make things work. Only for him to throw it all away without any regard to her feelings. “Did I do anything stupid…?” she asks me quietly, making her way to the sink and washing her face slowly. As soon as those words register in my mind, however, that sensation comes back to me. The warm light in the night. Our hands intertwined. And most of all, her kind words. All of that just built up that moment and I was helpless. It meant nothing… It’s just surprising, that’s all. That’s why my mind can’t stop thinking about it… “No, you didn’t. Other than asking me about a zoo we never went to.” Sunset laughs quietly, still trying to not move around suddenly. Turning off the faucet, Sunset leans against the counter, shaking her head. “Thank you, Adagio. Really. It means a lot to me that you helped me out of a bad situation and made sure I wasn’t alone.” Rubbing her forehead again, she barely looks towards me, squinting at the sunlight coming through the blinds. “Do you mind if I stay here for a little longer…? I’m not feeling so-” Instantly, she cuts herself off, closing her mouth as if trying to desperately hold something in. Bringing her hand to her mouth, she quickly goes into the bathroom, closing the door behind her. Once again, I’m left alone with my thoughts. It doesn’t matter whether she’s sick or dealing with a broken heart. I’ll be here. =================================================== “I’m thinking about joining the art club on campus,” Sunset tells me with a smile, trying to come up with something to talk about. It’s been a week since that party and Sunset hasn’t been doing well with her grades or life in general. I’ve been doing what I can to keep her standing though, so seeing this enthusiasm for something new is great. To finally see her happy about something. “Oh, really?” I ask her, looking at her image on the screen. Video calls are new to me, but Sunset has called me at least once every day of the past week to tell me news. Most of it is unexciting, but I think that’s mostly because she needs someone to talk to. Someone to tell her she’s doing great. “That’s great~ When is their next meeting?” In order to keep her talking, I’ve learned to ask questions related to the pertinent topic, even if I’m not interested in it myself. “They’re meeting tomorrow night, actually!” Sunset tells me with a bigger smile, seemingly happy that I’m interested in what she’s talking about. While she talks to me, she’s walking from one place to another, making her way to her next class. All the while, I’m laying on my bed in the dark. The only light I have illuminating my face is the blue light of the screen. “I know I haven’t really been that involved in the last week, but… I want to try, you know?” Sunset was always so determined and confident. She always wanted to help out around campus or try new things. That’s something he took away from her for these agonizingly long days. “I think you should do it. It sounds like it would be good for you,” I tell her with a smile of my own, trying to hide the conflict inside myself. To be honest, she isn’t the only one who’s been trying hard to get out of bed in the morning. This whole week, I can hardly get any sleep. At least, sleep that isn’t my mind reminding me of that night. I don’t dream of Flash or Sunset’s tears. All I’ve been able to dream of recently is that one fraction of a moment. The one time the universe seemingly froze… When she laid her lips on mine, everything in my head was seemingly thrown into disarray. I still haven’t been able to understand why. The surprise hasn’t worn off yet… All I can remember is looking into her eyes, holding her hand. The next second, she makes a mistake and kisses me. She was just looking for someone to rely on. Something to hold onto. I gave her that. We’re still friends and that’s all that matters. Then why does it feel like something changed…? “I’m going to go to their meeting~ Thanks for letting me talk about it!” A conflicted look comes across her face, stopping in the middle of some hallway. If I remember correctly, this hallway is in the science building… “I just arrived at my next class, so I’m going to have to call you back later. Is that alright?” A part of me doesn’t want to leave the call just yet. The light of the screen is the only thing illuminating my room and it’s the only reason I’m awake right now. That night won’t stop replaying in my mind, making it hard for me to get out of bed. I’ll forget about it eventually… “Yeah, that’s alright.” ================================================== The oven timer rings throughout the small room, making Sunset and me stop playing the game of chess. Quickly, Sunset runs over to the oven and opens it, slipping on some oven mitts with a smile. She had never made cookies before, but she really wanted to try since they remind her of Equestria. Seeing her smile slowly return to her after a few weeks is the best thing I could ask for. “I told you we could make them~” Sunset tells me with a smirk, placing the pan down and pulling off her mitts. As if in some desperate attempt to cool them down, Sunset fans her hands at the cookies, steam still coming off of the baked goods. Her fiery hair reflects light easily, my eyes having a hard time looking away from her. Standing up from the bed, a couple pieces fall off the board, but I don’t pay attention to the game. Instead, I simply walk towards the table, looking at Sunset’s seemingly happy smile. She’s been staying over more recently… One could easily say that’s because we’re friends, but the real reason is because I keep asking her to. No longer is she the one wanting to stay here. Now it’s my own selfish mind, wanting to spend more time with her. Every moment is more confusing than the last. Why does it almost feel like magic to have a friend…? To spend so much of your time with the same individual. I’ve come to accept that my mind will keep remembering that night, no matter how hard I try to forget it. It was a surprising event and those things stay around for a while… It doesn’t mean anything other than it surprised me. I’m sure I’ve surprised her before. In what way, I’m not sure… “They look sweet,” I tell her quietly, watching her serve the cookies on a couple plates. “I’m sure they are!” Sunset responds with a nod, walking over to the table and giving me one of the plates. “But I’m sure they’re not as sweet as you~ I mean, you’re always here for me. I’m not sure what I would do without you.” There it is again… That innocent stare. She said the same thing back then. When she was drunk, she said the exact same thing. Hopefully, not all the events of that night will be repeated. It was a drunken mistake… As her smile gets bigger, mine slowly disappears. Why won’t my mind stop reminding me of it…? “I’m not sure what I would do without you too.” ====================================================== The night is the time where I am able to think the most unfortunately… Sometimes, all I want to do in this world is sleep. My mind has other plans… Sunset has been incredibly active recently. Going to the gym and helping out on campus in the past couple months has made her pretty happy. I should be glad for her, but we haven’t had a whole lot of time for each other during this time… I miss her… A lot… My mind won’t stop remembering the times we’ve shared every chance it gets. Especially that one night… Trying to sleep is usually interrupted by those thoughts and I can’t help but feel conflicted. Those memories feel… nice for whatever reason. But I shouldn’t be thinking of her in this context… Sitting up in my bed, I look over at the clock, sighing at the number displayed on my digital alarm. It’s already three in the morning and I haven’t gotten any sleep. All my thoughts are centered on the fiery-haired woman… I can’t forget that one sensation… How soft her lips were… How good it felt to be there for her in a time of need. It’s like the world is punishing me for making friends with Sunset to begin with. All my heart wants is to see her again. To see her smile and feel her hug. To be with her when she’s doing something she loves and to see that excitement. Although, I suppose I already know we’re not friends anymore… Why did I have to get involved…? No… I would always be there for her. Why did he have to break her heart? If he didn’t cause all of that, I wouldn’t have to feel my heart beat every time I think of her now. She and I would still be friends and nothing would be different. Now all I can do is think of her, hoping she’s alright and wanting to make sure that smile is still on her face. My arms have felt empty ever since that night, wishing to hold her just one more time… If he didn’t break her, I wouldn’t be thinking of her all the time… Wishing to be with her… Someone like me… A siren who almost ruined her life back in high school. I want to be with her… Every day, I try to deny it, but every night reveals that truth. My body wants to feel her holding onto me one more time… My lips desire that same sensation I can’t seem to forget. God, I know it’s wrong. I’m supposed to be her friend. The one she spent so long reforming from a bloodthirsty siren. What right do I have to feel these things for her…? Why did all of this have to happen…? Every time I do see her, it gets progressively harder to not let it slip. To bite my tongue and avoid telling her this stupid secret of mine. But I know I have to tell her… I won’t get any peace if I don’t… I will keep spending my nights, sleepless in my bed, wondering “what if?” I’ll just keep longing for her, never being able to finally ask her. I’ll have to tell her… That I love her… All the Nice ThingsChapter IV: All the Nice Things Holding her hand tightly, I guide her down the sidewalk path, bright lights giving the night a whole new life. The snow on the grass makes everything just a little more cheery and I can’t help but treasure this moment with her. I convinced Sunset to come walk with me in a park after finals week. What she didn’t know was that the park would be decorated with dozens of Christmas lights, making it seem so lively and beautiful. Despite the fact that it’s night, I can see all of Sunset’s expressions, her happy smiles and wide-eyed stares at light fixtures. Often, she points at lights that are in unique shapes, making us both laugh as we walk. “Look! That one looks like an elf!” she excitedly exclaims, pointing at a light fixture on top of one of the trees. “Although, from this angle, it kind of looks like he’s sitting on the tree… That must be painful.” Both of us giggle at her joke, shaking my head slightly at the absurd placement of the light. “You’re right though~ This is the perfect way to destress after finals~” Her hand holds mine slightly tighter, a bright smile appearing on her face. It almost feels wrong of me to be here with her… I invited her here for what she thinks is the selfless reason to destress from school, but the real reason I brought us here is much more selfish… I decided… Tonight is the night. No more sleepless nights and days of denial. Sunset is my best friend in the whole world, but I need to tell her this secret I’ve been keeping for far too long. No matter what happens, at least I will be able to get the secret off my chest. Even if she doesn’t accept it, then she will be able to go forward without a selfish friend like me… No more lies and smoke screens. She deserves the truth… Even if it ends up breaking our friendship… All of this pressure makes it a little hard to enjoy the lights. At least I’ll have this final moment with her… Stopping in the middle of the sidewalk, Sunset comes to a halt and looks at me with a confused expression, slowly turning her body to me. “Is something wrong…?” she asks me quietly, her hand still holding onto mine. Almost every ounce of sadness she had from her breakup with Flash is entirely gone, her old self shining through the aftermath. I’m… so happy that it didn’t end up changing her. LIke it did with me… “Listen, Sunset.” I slowly pull my hand away from hers, knowing how this might go. The bright lights reflect off the snow, making Sunset seem like she’s in wonderland… She’s so… beautiful. “I didn’t actually bring you here to destress… I… wanted to spend time with you.” The noise of water running from the fountain nearby makes me feel a little nervous… Like time itself is telling me to get on with it. To hurry up and ruin this friendship as quickly as possible. Every ounce of my body tells me to not say anything more, but I know I have to… I need to… “I missed being with you and… I needed to tell you something.” Sunset’s confused expression only grows, her eyes locked with mine. “The night you broke up with Flash… You got really drunk and you ended up kissing me.” Sunset’s eyes quickly widen and she opens her mouth as if to say something, only for me to hold my hand up to stop her. I still have more to say… “And ever since then, I haven’t been able to get it off my mind… Sunset, I know I can be kind of a jerk, always teasing you for anything you do.” Taking a step back onto the snow, I can’t help but look at the ground, avoiding her gaze. I’m barely able to summon the strength to take my next breath for my words. “But I can’t stop thinking about that night… I can’t stop wishing that maybe things could be different. Maybe we could hold each other again and maybe I could feel how I felt that night again… I realized that… my feelings are complicated.” Looking into Sunset’s eyes once more, I can feel the weight of the world bearing down on me as she stares at me. “Sunset, I… I want to be with you… I miss you when you’re not around. I can hardly sleep and I always want to see your happy smile. I’ve tried so hard to make my stupid brain stop thinking these things, but I can’t… I never want to see you heartbroken again and I…” A knot forms in my throat, my whole body seemingly sweating. I can’t help but feel dizzy even thinking about saying those words… Why did I have to fall in love with you…? Why does this have to be so confusing? I need to tell you and yet my body makes it so hard to do so… “I… I love you, Sunset… I just want you to be happy and I keep… wishing to be with you…” Tears slowly fall down my cheeks, my mind already anticipating the worst from her. I can’t imagine life without her as my friend… She’s done so much for me and she means the world to me in so little time. The thought of losing her completely breaks me… A siren who’s supposed to be strong, just wishing for a mortal woman to stay with her… I’m sorry… I needed to tell you… Sunset’s eyes look towards the ground, turning away from me slightly as she tries to think of something to say. Conflict is written across her face, only making my mind run wild. “To be honest… I’ve felt a… similar way. Every time we’ve been around each other recently,” she tells me quietly, looking towards the fountain with a soft expression. “You’ve always been so kind and welcoming… You’re the only friend close enough that I can rely on.” Her eyes slowly look back towards me, a small smile coming to her lips. “How could I not feel… attached to you? You’re perfect in so many ways, Adagio…” The wind slowly blows her hair, making the lights shimmer off of it. “You were there for me after Flash… You helped me get back to my feet and realize what life is all about. Taking chances.” Holding her hand out in front of her, her smile only gets bigger. Her eyes lock with mine and I can see just how peaceful she feels. “Promise not to break my heart?” Looking down at her hand, I suddenly realize what exactly she means by her statement. What this whole gesture means… She didn’t hate my confession… She doesn’t hate me. Instantly, I can feel tears begin to form, taking her hand in my own as quickly as I can. Nodding, I feel the biggest smile come to me in my whole life, my heart pounding against my chest. “I promise~” Sunset’s arm quickly pulls me into a hug, holding me against her as tightly as she can. Within moments, both of us stain our shoulders with tears of joy, Sunset’s hands gripping onto me for dear life. She means so much to me… I would never want to break her heart. I only want to see her smile, as long as I can. “I love you too, Adagio~”
CheckmateChapter I: Checkmate The fall semester is always a time where students are stressed out and overworked, depending on which classes they are enrolled in. Some professors are pretty lax about their assignments and what rules they enforce, but this seems to be pretty rare the farther along you get. Money is another issue, but I qualified for enough scholarships to attend Canterlot City University, thankfully. After the Battle of the Bands at Canterlot High, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do with my life. I mean, what was a siren supposed to do…? I either had to adapt or suffer. So, I decided to enroll and try to get some sort of degree… To my surprise, Sunset Shimmer was also enrolled in this university, which made things… difficult. At least for the first couple of semesters. Today, I almost find it humorous that I hated her back then. I’m currently in my junior year and I probably wouldn’t have made it this far without Sunset’s help. She was always pushing to get to know me more and to take some of our general education requirements together. I guess she sort of… rubbed off on me. She seemed genuinely sorry that she took our magic away and she was always trying to lend a helpful hand. She became someone I could rely on. Even with our bad history, she was willing to help where she could and didn’t seem to let my spiteful attitude keep her from smiling. Maybe that’s why we became friends in the first place. Her curious optimism and her positive outlook on life, convincing me that even a siren can find her place in this world without magic. Now, the two of us spend nearly every day together. I admit that Shimmer is a little… annoying at times. With her constant pressure to be good rather than bend the rules a little bit. That’s something I find humorous to mess with though. To try and make Sunset break a few rules. She successfully “reformed” me, so I should have some fun in making Sunset be the bad girl in exchange, right? Regardless, Sunset is a… good friend. She and I are planning on playing chess tonight if everything goes well. Until then, I have to study my physics textbook. Walking down the hallway, the vague smell of dust and dirt reminds me of the state of the dorms. This university doesn’t really invest much into the lower dorms, leading to the carpets being reduced to shreds and the paint on the walls chipping off. My classes for the day have ended so far, but that doesn’t mean my night will be any less stressful. I don’t look forward to studying all the material assigned for my classes, but it has to be done. At least Sunset and I can spend some time together to relax before the weekend. Actually, I should probably call the girls tomorrow… It’s been way too long since we’ve talked. They’re attending a different college, but at least they can look out for each other. We can see each other during Christmas too, so we’ll have quite a bit of time to catch up, but a call would still be nice. Quickly making my way up the stairs, the echo of my footsteps bounces around the walls. The thing I’m looking forward to the most is getting to sleep tonight. All I have to do is write notes down for a few chapters, play a couple games with Sunset and then I can let myself shut my eyes under my blanket. Opening the door to my floor, a slight smile comes to my lips, thinking about how good it will feel to finally go to sleep. I’ve been awake for close to sixteen hours now, so I will definitely enjoy a good night’s sleep after all of this. As tempting as it is to take a nap in the middle of the afternoon, I know I wouldn’t end up getting to my notes before tomorrow. That’s something I can’t afford. Bringing my keys out of my bag, I quickly slide my dorm key into the door, unlocking it with ease. To my surprise, the lights in my room are already on, making me raise my eyebrow. Looking towards my bed, the reason for the lights immediately becomes clear to me. Lying down, her fiery hair spills out all across my pillow, her eyes looking towards me with a smirk, holding a box on top of her chest. Despite her restful position, she’s still wearing her shoes, looking like she either just came in or she just didn’t care to get more comfortable. “I told you that you could make yourself at home, you know,” I tell her with a slight roll of my eyes, amused at the whole situation. Just because she has a key to my room doesn’t mean I expected her to use it. Well, under emergencies, sure. I would hope she uses it. “I know, but I just got here,” Sunset responds with a giggle, sitting up on my bed with slightly messy hair. “I didn’t really expect you to be home so quickly, though.” Locking the door behind me, I shake my head with a smile, putting my textbook down on my table. “You should know my class schedule at this point,” I tease her with a smirk before pulling my coat off, kicking my shoes off and feeling relieved to finally be free of them. “What’s with the box?” Despite my curiosity, I actually want an answer as to why she’s here. We’re supposed to hang out later tonight, making now the optimal time to get some studying done. “It’s just a chess kit,” Sunset explains, putting the box down on the bed before brushing her hair away from her face. “About tonight…” Her previously happy and smug demeanor is now replaced by a nervous expression, a slight chuckle coming from her lips. “My plans have changed.” Changed…? Raising my eyebrow, I slowly approach the opposite side of the bed, sitting down in front of Sunset with a weary look. “Care to elaborate?” My question only seems to make Sunset a little more nervous, her eyes avoiding mine for a few moments. “Well, Flash wants to go to a party and he asked if I could go with him.” Without wasting a second, a small sigh leaves my lips, already knowing exactly where this is going. Her boyfriend often takes up a lot of her time, so I shouldn’t be surprised, but she and I planned this a week in advance. He couldn’t have asked her before the day of the party? Damn it… “I know, I know. I’m sorry… But I know how much this means to you since we’ve both been pretty busy.” Busy is kind of the wrong word. It’s actually due to her spending her time with Flash that we haven’t been able to hang out for two weeks, but I digress. “So, I thought that maybe we could play chess now and all? That way, we can still hang out before I go to the party.” Looking up at Sunset, her hands now hold the box up, smiling as well as she can to try and appease me. As much as I support her relationship with Flash, I can’t help but feel slightly annoyed that he takes up all the time of the one friend I have in college. The least he could have done is tell her about it before today so that both of us could have planned around it. Now, I’m basically told that if we don’t play now, we won’t be able to later. If I do play with her now, I will be up half the night studying. “You’re sure you can’t skip the party…? Just this once?” I ask her with a sigh, averting my gaze to the blanket. Bringing my hand to my hair, I can’t help but feel a bit… upset. I know that a relationship is supposed to be a lot of give and take and I respect Sunset for that, but I also feel like I’m at the losing end of this whole situation. I mean, god… She’s my only friend. I know I hated her before, but is it so wrong of me to want to spend time with her? I guess Flash doesn’t even think about that aspect. “Flash and I haven’t really been seeing eye-to-eye recently, so I kind of need to go. I want to spend time with him so that he knows I still care about him,” Sunset tells me with a tender voice, trying to be caring about both my needs and his. “I miss hanging out with you too, so I decided to come here a bit earlier. I hope we can still play…?” Despite how easy it is to feel rotten about the whole ordeal, it’s hard to stay angry when I look at her, clearly trying to do her best. I guess it’s a good thing in the end that she can even spare this time. If I play now, then I will be a lot more tired when I finally go to bed… But it would be worth it, I suppose… I mean, being able to play at all is a good thing. “Fine. But next time, you need to cancel on Flash instead of me.” Taking the box out of her hands, I open it with a small smile, happy that we can spend this time together. “Deal~”
All It TakesChapter II: All It Takes The farther I get along, the more my mind begins to melt away. All the terms and math in physics never fails to confuse me, which is only made worse by my exhaustion. Numbers and characters, all of which need to be explained through steps. If the textbook takes it easy on me, I won’t have to account for friction on most of these problems. If I do, then I will be up until six in the morning. At that point, it might as well be an all-nighter. God, I hope not… I’ve already been up for a while. I just want to sleep at this point, but the chapters can’t study themselves… By extension, the exams won’t finish themselves either, so yeah. Back when I had my magic, I didn’t really have to worry about that, but now I’ve been reduced to a mortal who has to hope they will pass an exam… But I’m also happy now… I have friends and I have fun. I guess it’s a fair trade at the end of the day. Running my fingers through my hair, I sigh quietly, closing my eyes for a moment to rest from the boring details of each page. I would mark the book’s pages with highlighter, but since this is a rental, I would be fined for it. The university takes it pretty seriously to keep their books in a good condition. So, the best I can do is take notes off of each chapter. My hand cramps easily from all the notes that I deem important, but it’s better to be safe than sorry, right? I mean, I’m not even sure what the professor will put on the exam… Putting the textbook down, I slowly stand up, stretching my arms and back. Sitting here all day has pretty much made my whole body feel stiff. Looking at the window, only darkness slips through the blinds, making me pull my phone out of my pocket to check the time. Even though it’s only ten, it feels like it’s three in the morning… Walking towards the counter in my room, I look inside some of the overhead cupboards for something to snack on. Unsurprisingly, nothing other than some crackers is present. I haven’t gone grocery shopping in a while and the lack of a meal plan only worsens my problem. Of course, everything is closed at this time as well, except for some pretty bad fast food. Despite my disdain for them, my stomach is telling me I need to eat or sleep. Since sleeping isn’t on the table right now, the best thing I can do is try and get something to eat. Grabbing my keys from the counter, I walk over to my shoes before I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket. The only people who text me are Sunset and the girls, but I highly doubt it would be Aria and Sonata at this time of the night. They would probably be asleep, trying to get to bed early due to Aria’s insomnia. Pulling the phone out of my pocket, I look at the notification, seeing Sunset’s profile picture. Her happy smile with a bright horizon behind her. I think we went to the beach when I took this picture. She asked me to take a picture due to her wanting to remember the day, but I ended up keeping it in my gallery as well. Tapping the notification, my eyes widen almost immediately. “Can you pick me up? It’s an emergency,” her message explains to me in frank and short detail, making me feel slightly worried. Sunset never used the word “emergency” with me before… What could make her use that word…? “Are you alright?” I quickly type into my phone, slipping on my shoes as fast as I can. No response is sent by the time I grab my coat and make it to the door, feeling my heart beat a little faster. What could be an emergency…? “I’ll be there in a second. Send me the address.” Food can wait… Whatever is going on with Sunset will have to take priority. ====================================================== Pulling up to a street corner at a park, my eyes look around my surroundings, trying to make sure I’ve made it to the right location. Loud sounds and bright lights come from a house up the hill away from the park, making this area seem more peaceful and serene in comparison. Sunset said she was at a party, so why would she be here…? All she sent was a location and failed to explain what was wrong in her texts, seeming like she would rather not talk about it. Looking to my left, I see a bench under one of the streetlights, bright red and yellow hair being the only thing I can focus on. Her head is aimed towards the ground, casting her face in shadows while she sits there. Without wasting a second, I put my car in park, getting out of it and locking it behind me. What happened at this party…? Sunset is usually so happy and outgoing, so seeing her slumped in this bench makes me feel pretty worried. Quickly, I make my way towards Sunset, the sound of my footsteps being one of the only sounds here other than the music from up the hill. “Sunset?” I say carefully, trying to call her name to get her attention. Her head slowly tilts upwards, looking into my eyes with tears streaming down her face. From how red her eyes look and her puffy cheeks, it looks like she’s been crying for a while… “H-hey, Adagio,” Sunset weakly states, her cracked voice showing how little energy she has as her hands wipe away some of her tears. Without saying another word, she slowly stands up from her seated position, walking towards me with her head hanging low. “Can we go?” she asks me without making eye contact, my mind thinking a thousand thoughts per second. Why is she crying…? What made her cry? How can I fix this…? “What happened?” I ask her slowly, bringing my hands to her shoulders. This girl that I used to call my enemy has tears running down her face and I can’t help but feel worried. She is one of my only friends… She was there for me when no one else was, even when I didn’t want her to be there. I gave her so much hostility and she gave me nothing but kindness in return. Why do I feel so angry that something made her cry like this…? “It’s n-nothing. It’s just Flash.” Her voice is still weak, barely speaking her words without letting her walls break again. Her boyfriend again…? God damn it… What did he do? What could he have done to make Sunset cry like this? In front of people as well? “What did he do, Sunset?” I ask her carefully, wrapping my arms around her back and pulling her into my embrace. Despite the fact that she doesn’t return the hug, I can tell that Sunset enjoys this small moment of peace. “Please. Tell me what’s wrong, Sunset,” I whisper quietly, holding onto her as tightly as I can. This girl who has always been here for me makes me feel so helpless when she cries… What kind of cruel fate is it that she has to cry? I mean, she’s done nothing but do her best in this world. She’s made mistakes in the past, but she’s made up for them tenfold by now. Sunset is the person that deserves this the least in the world… A small part of me can’t help but question why I feel so angry at this situation, but another part of me knows that Sunset doesn’t deserve this. Why couldn’t she have had a good night at the party…? Shaking slightly, Sunset begins to cry into my shoulder, her arms returning the embrace I’ve given her slowly. She desperately holds onto me, trying to find some sort of support. I won’t let her fall… I’ll be here. I would do anything to try and make up for these tears. “H-he cheated on me…” The pit of fire in my heart burns even brighter immediately after hearing her words… My mind can’t seem to think rationally… All I can focus on is the crying Sunset in my arms and the person who broke her down to this level. The guy she tried so hard to appease and be there for is the same person who throws her to the curb the very next day? The same guy she tried so damn hard to show him that she loved him and that he really mattered to her? This guy made us have to cancel and rework so many of our plans to hang out and I always tried to be understanding. She was in a relationship and I wanted to support her for that. He took advantage of not only our time, her hard work, but also her heart…? What in tartarus makes him think he gets the right to treat Sunset like she’s trash? The one friend I have after the Battle of the Bands… “I’m not letting this night end like this,” I whisper instinctively, not controlling the words that come out of my mouth. Letting go of Sunset, my body instantly turns towards the loud house, walking in its direction. “A-Adagio, don’t,” Sunset weakly calls out for me, still trying to protect him. Even if someone completely screws her over, Sunset still somehow has the drive to respect them and protect them. It’s an honorable quality… One I don’t have… My body is moving on its own at this point… Every cell of my body knows what I want to do. Unlike Sunset, I lack the self-control to stop myself from doing this. Why should I? This is the right thing to do. He took Sunset’s kindness and threw it away. He took her smile and made it disappear completely… Nothing would make me happier than to make him realize just how much he screwed up. I can’t help but clench my fists, thousands of thoughts running through my mind easily. If I was still a siren, I could kill him in a thousand different ways… Every one of them involves pure force rather than my magic… Someone like him doesn’t deserve the respect that a death involving magic would entail. Then again, the magic in Equestria could make him feel the fire I feel inside my heart. Every new option in my mind is better than the last… What scum would fail to realize how hard their girlfriend worked to be with them and make sure they both could be together…? Walking through the front lawn, I quickly open the door to the house, the music only getting louder as a result. The whole place smells strongly of alcohol as everyone dances and socializes with one another. Neon lights project onto the walls and laughter can easily be heard. Despite all the distracting details, my mind remains focused on one thing… Walking through the rooms quickly, my eyes scan the crowds, looking for the blue-haired dickhead that ruined Sunset’s day. Everyone seems to be enjoying their night, not a care in the world as Sunset’s world falls apart… Why should they celebrate as Sunset breaks down in tears in the cold night air? It’s all so sickening… Why do they deserve the good night that she should be given? Is there no justice in this world? It’s funny… Here I am, looking for justice against someone when I was the evil one just a few years ago. She deserves some justice… Walking out into the back yard, a big table full of drinks is to my right and a large pool is directly in front of me. Lights inside the pool make it visible to see inside the water, but the person standing by the pool captures more of my attention. Seeing his blue hair makes my blood boil, grabbing a cup of punch instantly. My feet quickly make me walk forward, my eyes centered on him. His eyes finally look towards me, a surprised expression overtaking his face. “Oh, Adagio-” Before he can finish his sentence, my hand instinctively throws forwards the cup, splashing the liquid in his face. It feels so damn sweet to see this bastard get a little of what he deserves. But it’s not enough… Bringing my hand up quickly, I strike the side of his face, causing him to fall into the pool. The water will probably ruin some of his clothes, but he deserves all of this and more. Coming to the surface, Flash takes a big gulp of air, struggling to keep up with what just happened to him. “What the hell was that?!” he yells, making everyone look in our direction. I can feel the fire roar in my heart, my lips twitching slightly. The anger inside me desperately tries to find some way to release itself, my eyes staring down at the trash floating in the water. “You have the audacity to cheat on your loving girlfriend at the party YOU invited her to!” I yell in response, the fire in my eyes never failing to go away. Every cell of my body screams at me to hurt him more, but I manage to hold myself back, knowing that the humiliation he will suffer for this will probably hurt more than the physical pain right now. “Trash like you hurt the genuinely good people in this world and I hope you get what you deserve.” Turning around, I attempt to walk away before I hear Flash laugh from the pool. Everyone else around us is deathly quiet, watching this whole interaction. “You’re one to talk! You’re the most evil one of us all, isn’t that right?” Staring back down at him, I can feel my body move towards the pool, fully prepared to harm him even more… Pulling myself back, I can’t help but grimace at Flash, wanting to rip the skin from his skull. “If you EVER come near Sunset again, I will kill you. That isn’t a threat.” Bringing my hand down, I compose my face, smiling down at him slightly. “It’s a warning.” Without wasting a second more on his pathetic ass, I turn around and see Sunset standing inside the house, a surprised expression on her face that keeps her from crying for now. Quickly walking towards her, I take her hand in mine, walking towards the front of the house with every part of me telling me to turn back and do something more to Flash. “Let’s go.” ===================================================== The door slowly swings open in front of us, not a thing changed inside my room since I left it. The soft yellow light of the lamp beside my bed is the only thing illuminating the walls of my room, making it look later than it actually is. Slowly walking inside, I guide Sunset in and close the door behind her. “Why are we here, Adagio?” she quietly asks me, her eyes once again avoiding mine. The whole ride over here, Sunset was either crying or staring at the floor. No matter what someone could say to try and convince me otherwise, I don’t believe leaving her alone is the best course of action. I… don’t want to leave her alone… “I should go to my room,” her weak voice barely tells me, her hand rubbing her arm with her eyes looking like she could burst into tears at any moment. “I don’t want to leave you alone,” I speak honestly, unsure of what words will come out of my mouth. “You don’t deserve to be left alone on a night like tonight.” Her eyes close as soon as she hears my words, her fingers gripping her shoulder even tighter. “No, I-I do. I do deserve-” Without a moment passing by, my arms wrap around her weak body, pulling her close to me. Please don’t say that… Just hearing those words would break my spirit, throwing every ounce of hope inside me out the window. Why does the universe have to punish her? Why not me…? She doesn’t deserve to cry tonight… To feel so small and helpless. Can I really do nothing to help…? “Don’t say that,” I whisper to her, pressing my cheek against hers. At this point, even I don't even know what I’m doing. I don’t think Sunset and I have ever hugged this much, but most of it has been instinct… My heart just tells me what to do and my body follows, not bothering to ask my mind for input. “You’re worth so much, Sunset… Don’t let that asshole make you believe you’re worthless. Please.” I don’t know what to say at this point. Words just fall out of my mouth and I can’t help but pray that it all comes out alright. Feeling her soft hair in my hand, I feel a grimace come over my face, thinking of the person who hurt her. “I don’t want to leave you alone. So… I’m asking you to please stay. For tonight.” Looking her in the eye, a surprised look comes over her again, not a sound interrupting us. To completely break Sunset’s spirit… What could I even do to him to make him feel exactly what she feels…? A conflicted tone comes to Sunset’s tired eyes, her gaze briefly going to the door. Sunset wants to leave, but something’s stopping her from outright doing so… Maybe she knows how much she needs just a little company. “P-promise you don’t mind?” Sunset whispers to me, her face looking like she really needs someone to be here for her… A friend… Someone like me. I won’t let her down… “I promise.” Brushing the hair out of Sunset’s face, my mind feels like a blur, trying to come up with the next course of action. How can I help her from here? There’s nothing to do in my apartment other than sleep… “Could I have one of your beers?” Sunset asks me with a slight sniffle, wiping away a tear from her cheek and trying desperately to keep her walls up. A part of me can’t help but ask whether that’s a good idea at this time, but all doubt leaves my mind every time I look at her again… She needs something to distract herself, right…? “Of course, Sunset.” ===================================================== The silence that had once filled my room is gone now, being replaced by giggles and laughter. In Sunset’s attempt to try and calm herself down, she ended up drinking multiple of my beers from my fridge, making her giggle at some of the most basic jokes. Taking a big sip, Sunset hiccups slightly, leaning on my shoulder with a big smile on her face. “How big was the turtle at the zoo again~?” she asks me quickly, poking my shoulder with the can in her hand. I would try to tell her exactly how big this turtle is, but I only have one problem. We never went to the zoo together, so I have no idea what she’s talking about. “About the size of a car,” I say with a happy tone, playing into the story that is unfolding in her mind. Just seeing her smile like this makes me feel so much better. I know it’s probably temporary, but… is it wrong of me to want to see her happy…? She’ll have to deal with a massive headache tomorrow, but at least she will be able to forget about what happened for a little while. “Oh yeah!” she exclaims, giggling at my response as she holds onto my arm. “O-oh, Adagio~ Do you know how much bread a giraffe can eat?” she asks me, locking her eyes with my own. Even though it’s the alcohol that’s giving her this buzz, it’s nice to see a spark in her eyes again. Just being close to her and seeing her happy is… nice. “I’m not sure? How much?” I ask her quietly, preparing for some fact or punchline. Taking a deep breath, Sunset slowly leans in, pressing her forehead against my own and closing her eyes. “I don’t know~” she simply states, giggling at her seemingly funny punchline. Or lack of one. Her hand brings the can of beer up to the sky, leaning back as she looks up at the ceiling. Even when Sunset is sober and not heartbroken, she is never this carefree. She almost always has something on her mind that she’s stressing out about. To see her like this is honestly a breath of fresh air. It’s fun and it even takes my mind off of the upcoming exams. I hate to say it, but even I giggled at Sunset’s nonsensical joke. Not because I have been drinking too, but because I just enjoy being with her. She’s my only friend here… I wouldn’t touch a drop of alcohol when it comes to helping her out. “You know, I can’t remember what it’s like to have hooves,” she casually tells me with a slight hiccup, looking at her hand with an odd fascination. “Aren’t fingers… weird? I mean, they’re just parts of our limbs that let us grab things.” “Well, yeah. I can see what you mean,” I respond slowly, looking down at my own hand. I can remember what it was like to be a siren… I remember how my scales felt and how it was like to have hooves. I remember seeing was slightly different with a muzzle instead of a relatively flat face like humans have. That observation is accurate, but one I didn’t expect to come from a drunk Sunset. “But then again, hands are beautiful in a way. We can build things and destroy. We can hold things.” Turning to me slowly, her eyes connect with mine, a sparkling happiness in them. “Or hold the people we love. Isn’t that amazing?” Another hiccup comes from Sunset’s lips, but our eyes stay connected, her face oddly close to mine. In her drunken state, Sunset seemingly forgets about personal space and loves being close to someone else. I can’t say that this experience is unenjoyable for me though… Looking into those eyes that reflect the ocean remind me precisely why she’s a good friend. She’s reliable, trustworthy and most of all, stubborn. Even though I was pretty mean to her when she first tried to be my friend, she kept trying with that near limitless determination. Seeing Flash almost destroy that tonight makes me irrationally angry. That determination is what helped me be happy. Her confidence is what made me believe that I can still have a life, despite the loss of my magic. Gently, Sunset’s hand grabs onto my own, her smile widening slowly. “Like holding their hand~” Sunset’s other hand slowly drops the empty can onto the ground, leaning onto me with a slightly sleepy expression. Despite my mind telling me not to, I go along with her action, lying down on the bed and letting Sunset rest on top of me. The air is cool. Not a sound can be heard other than our breathing, Sunset’s stomach expanding against my body in a slow rhythm reminding me of her presence. Her hand holds onto mine, rubbing my thumb across the back of her hand slowly. I never realized how soft her skin is… She and I hardly hug at all, despite us being friends. From her displays with her other friends, she made me believe that hugging is like a ritual for friendships. I’ve hardly ever felt her hair other than tonight. All of that changed when Sunset got drunk. She was overly clingy and liked to hug me. She is probably the only person I don’t mind doing this with… My mind is so stubborn to keep up a certain reputation as the bad girl who doesn’t need help that I refuse to allow someone to hug me usually. But with her…? She somehow breaks me down to my most fundamental levels. She makes me feel like it’s alright to be vulnerable and when I see someone hurt her… I feel angry. Just like any friend would. “I take your kindness for granted, Adagio,” Sunset tells me with a soft hum, almost sounding like it’s a sober statement. “You’re so nice to me. You help me whenever I need it. You’re always trying to act tough, but you’re actually pretty soft.” Her eyes look up to me again, a happy smile dawning on her face. Why is it easy to get lost in someone else’s eyes? Is it everyone’s eyes or just hers? “Not just your hair or stuff. But your soul is soft too~” The warm light of the lamp is the only thing illuminating both of us, just dim enough to make someone feel tired. This same light is cast on her, making her look almost angelic. She deserves to feel happy tonight. No one should have the luxury of destroying her ego and happy nature like Flash did tonight. Slowly, Sunset’s hand reaches up to my face and cups my cheek, her face ever so close to mine. “You’re so… nice. Kind. Special. What would I do without you?” Sunset slowly asks me, getting closer to me. The heat of her breath spreads across my lips, my mind unsure how to handle the situation. My body is acting weird… Shocks of electricity go up my spine and I can’t quite control it. Even though it’s just Sunset, I can’t help but feel confused about this situation. Before I can say anything, Sunset places her lips against mine, a giant shock of electricity running through my body. Her hand never lets go of my own and the embrace lasts for what feels like an eternity. Why is she… kissing me…? Her lips feel so soft… I understand that she’s drunk, but… what would make her do this? We’re just friends and… and… Without giving me any chance to organize my thoughts, Sunset lets go of the kiss, quickly falling asleep in a drunken mess on my chest. Her closed eyes make her look so peaceful, despite the amount she drank. More importantly, the feeling of her lips remains on my mouth… The warm yellow light is the only thing that accompanies me now. My hand slowly strokes her hair, holding her close to me. That kiss was just a mistake on her part. She didn’t realize what she was doing and I should have stopped it. Yeah… We’ll still be friends by tomorrow morning… Reaching up to the lamp, I turn off the light, letting us rest in the peaceful darkness. By tomorrow, I’m sure she will be her old self. Everything will be fine and back to normal. Like nothing happened… Bringing my fingers to my lips, I try to rub the sensation away, laying my head on the pillow. Everything will be back to normal…
A New NormalChapter III: A New Normal The warm light of the day slips through the cracks of the blinds, alerting everyone inside of the morning. In my room, there are only two people. Sunset. And me. I barely got any sleep last night. Maybe it was because my mind wanted to make sure Sunset is alright, but I’m not sure… No matter how hard I tried to think of bouncing sheep, my mind always strayed towards thoughts of Sunset. About the night before. About all the times we’ve shared together. I’ve never thought about her this much in the span of twenty-four hours, but here I am. Maybe I’m still mad at Flash… That could be the reason why. All through the night, I held Sunset close to me and stroked my fingers through her hair, trying to make sure she had a good sleep even if I didn’t. I couldn’t get my mind off of it… Off of that one thing. She was drunk and it meant nothing… So why does it feel like something…? Staring at the ceiling above me, I feel Sunset’s body move slightly more than she had all night. A groan comes from her lips, struggling to bring herself to reality. Through a lot of effort, she slowly pulls her head off my chest, squinting to look at her surroundings. “Good morning,” I tell her quietly, attracting her attention. “Adagio? Why does my… head hurt so much?” she barely asks me before bringing her hand to her forehead, whimpering at the headache. The buzz has worn off, leaving only a miserable hangover. “Was I… sleeping on you?” Her eyes are still squinting as she tries to sit up, holding her head all the while. A couple more groans come out of her as I move up beside her, stretching my arms. “Well, you kinda initiated it. After you drank everything from my fridge.” Sunset’s eyes instantly look over at me, making her wince at the sudden move. Nonetheless, surprise is written all across her face. “You want proof? Look around us,” I tell her while moving my arm out in front of us, presenting the empty beer cans galore. A blush comes to Sunset’s face, her hand rubbing her forehead before looking at me again. “I’m sorry… I didn't mean to drink so much.” Taking another look at the cans all around her, a loud sigh exits her lungs. “What happened…?” “You don’t remember?” Sunset shakes her head to my question, slowly placing her hand on the bed and pushing herself up, wobbly standing in front of my bed. “I can’t remember what happened after I started drinking, if that’s what you’re asking. I still remember what…” she stops herself quickly, looking down at the floor quietly, “he did…” I was almost hoping that she would have forgotten that as well… But I suppose that would mean I would have to reopen the wound by telling her. In my opinion, it’s better that she’s no longer with him, but I know she genuinely cared about him. Even if I wasn’t the biggest fan of how he would take our time away from us, she tried so hard to make him happy and make things work. Only for him to throw it all away without any regard to her feelings. “Did I do anything stupid…?” she asks me quietly, making her way to the sink and washing her face slowly. As soon as those words register in my mind, however, that sensation comes back to me. The warm light in the night. Our hands intertwined. And most of all, her kind words. All of that just built up that moment and I was helpless. It meant nothing… It’s just surprising, that’s all. That’s why my mind can’t stop thinking about it… “No, you didn’t. Other than asking me about a zoo we never went to.” Sunset laughs quietly, still trying to not move around suddenly. Turning off the faucet, Sunset leans against the counter, shaking her head. “Thank you, Adagio. Really. It means a lot to me that you helped me out of a bad situation and made sure I wasn’t alone.” Rubbing her forehead again, she barely looks towards me, squinting at the sunlight coming through the blinds. “Do you mind if I stay here for a little longer…? I’m not feeling so-” Instantly, she cuts herself off, closing her mouth as if trying to desperately hold something in. Bringing her hand to her mouth, she quickly goes into the bathroom, closing the door behind her. Once again, I’m left alone with my thoughts. It doesn’t matter whether she’s sick or dealing with a broken heart. I’ll be here. =================================================== “I’m thinking about joining the art club on campus,” Sunset tells me with a smile, trying to come up with something to talk about. It’s been a week since that party and Sunset hasn’t been doing well with her grades or life in general. I’ve been doing what I can to keep her standing though, so seeing this enthusiasm for something new is great. To finally see her happy about something. “Oh, really?” I ask her, looking at her image on the screen. Video calls are new to me, but Sunset has called me at least once every day of the past week to tell me news. Most of it is unexciting, but I think that’s mostly because she needs someone to talk to. Someone to tell her she’s doing great. “That’s great~ When is their next meeting?” In order to keep her talking, I’ve learned to ask questions related to the pertinent topic, even if I’m not interested in it myself. “They’re meeting tomorrow night, actually!” Sunset tells me with a bigger smile, seemingly happy that I’m interested in what she’s talking about. While she talks to me, she’s walking from one place to another, making her way to her next class. All the while, I’m laying on my bed in the dark. The only light I have illuminating my face is the blue light of the screen. “I know I haven’t really been that involved in the last week, but… I want to try, you know?” Sunset was always so determined and confident. She always wanted to help out around campus or try new things. That’s something he took away from her for these agonizingly long days. “I think you should do it. It sounds like it would be good for you,” I tell her with a smile of my own, trying to hide the conflict inside myself. To be honest, she isn’t the only one who’s been trying hard to get out of bed in the morning. This whole week, I can hardly get any sleep. At least, sleep that isn’t my mind reminding me of that night. I don’t dream of Flash or Sunset’s tears. All I’ve been able to dream of recently is that one fraction of a moment. The one time the universe seemingly froze… When she laid her lips on mine, everything in my head was seemingly thrown into disarray. I still haven’t been able to understand why. The surprise hasn’t worn off yet… All I can remember is looking into her eyes, holding her hand. The next second, she makes a mistake and kisses me. She was just looking for someone to rely on. Something to hold onto. I gave her that. We’re still friends and that’s all that matters. Then why does it feel like something changed…? “I’m going to go to their meeting~ Thanks for letting me talk about it!” A conflicted look comes across her face, stopping in the middle of some hallway. If I remember correctly, this hallway is in the science building… “I just arrived at my next class, so I’m going to have to call you back later. Is that alright?” A part of me doesn’t want to leave the call just yet. The light of the screen is the only thing illuminating my room and it’s the only reason I’m awake right now. That night won’t stop replaying in my mind, making it hard for me to get out of bed. I’ll forget about it eventually… “Yeah, that’s alright.” ================================================== The oven timer rings throughout the small room, making Sunset and me stop playing the game of chess. Quickly, Sunset runs over to the oven and opens it, slipping on some oven mitts with a smile. She had never made cookies before, but she really wanted to try since they remind her of Equestria. Seeing her smile slowly return to her after a few weeks is the best thing I could ask for. “I told you we could make them~” Sunset tells me with a smirk, placing the pan down and pulling off her mitts. As if in some desperate attempt to cool them down, Sunset fans her hands at the cookies, steam still coming off of the baked goods. Her fiery hair reflects light easily, my eyes having a hard time looking away from her. Standing up from the bed, a couple pieces fall off the board, but I don’t pay attention to the game. Instead, I simply walk towards the table, looking at Sunset’s seemingly happy smile. She’s been staying over more recently… One could easily say that’s because we’re friends, but the real reason is because I keep asking her to. No longer is she the one wanting to stay here. Now it’s my own selfish mind, wanting to spend more time with her. Every moment is more confusing than the last. Why does it almost feel like magic to have a friend…? To spend so much of your time with the same individual. I’ve come to accept that my mind will keep remembering that night, no matter how hard I try to forget it. It was a surprising event and those things stay around for a while… It doesn’t mean anything other than it surprised me. I’m sure I’ve surprised her before. In what way, I’m not sure… “They look sweet,” I tell her quietly, watching her serve the cookies on a couple plates. “I’m sure they are!” Sunset responds with a nod, walking over to the table and giving me one of the plates. “But I’m sure they’re not as sweet as you~ I mean, you’re always here for me. I’m not sure what I would do without you.” There it is again… That innocent stare. She said the same thing back then. When she was drunk, she said the exact same thing. Hopefully, not all the events of that night will be repeated. It was a drunken mistake… As her smile gets bigger, mine slowly disappears. Why won’t my mind stop reminding me of it…? “I’m not sure what I would do without you too.” ====================================================== The night is the time where I am able to think the most unfortunately… Sometimes, all I want to do in this world is sleep. My mind has other plans… Sunset has been incredibly active recently. Going to the gym and helping out on campus in the past couple months has made her pretty happy. I should be glad for her, but we haven’t had a whole lot of time for each other during this time… I miss her… A lot… My mind won’t stop remembering the times we’ve shared every chance it gets. Especially that one night… Trying to sleep is usually interrupted by those thoughts and I can’t help but feel conflicted. Those memories feel… nice for whatever reason. But I shouldn’t be thinking of her in this context… Sitting up in my bed, I look over at the clock, sighing at the number displayed on my digital alarm. It’s already three in the morning and I haven’t gotten any sleep. All my thoughts are centered on the fiery-haired woman… I can’t forget that one sensation… How soft her lips were… How good it felt to be there for her in a time of need. It’s like the world is punishing me for making friends with Sunset to begin with. All my heart wants is to see her again. To see her smile and feel her hug. To be with her when she’s doing something she loves and to see that excitement. Although, I suppose I already know we’re not friends anymore… Why did I have to get involved…? No… I would always be there for her. Why did he have to break her heart? If he didn’t cause all of that, I wouldn’t have to feel my heart beat every time I think of her now. She and I would still be friends and nothing would be different. Now all I can do is think of her, hoping she’s alright and wanting to make sure that smile is still on her face. My arms have felt empty ever since that night, wishing to hold her just one more time… If he didn’t break her, I wouldn’t be thinking of her all the time… Wishing to be with her… Someone like me… A siren who almost ruined her life back in high school. I want to be with her… Every day, I try to deny it, but every night reveals that truth. My body wants to feel her holding onto me one more time… My lips desire that same sensation I can’t seem to forget. God, I know it’s wrong. I’m supposed to be her friend. The one she spent so long reforming from a bloodthirsty siren. What right do I have to feel these things for her…? Why did all of this have to happen…? Every time I do see her, it gets progressively harder to not let it slip. To bite my tongue and avoid telling her this stupid secret of mine. But I know I have to tell her… I won’t get any peace if I don’t… I will keep spending my nights, sleepless in my bed, wondering “what if?” I’ll just keep longing for her, never being able to finally ask her. I’ll have to tell her… That I love her…
All the Nice ThingsChapter IV: All the Nice Things Holding her hand tightly, I guide her down the sidewalk path, bright lights giving the night a whole new life. The snow on the grass makes everything just a little more cheery and I can’t help but treasure this moment with her. I convinced Sunset to come walk with me in a park after finals week. What she didn’t know was that the park would be decorated with dozens of Christmas lights, making it seem so lively and beautiful. Despite the fact that it’s night, I can see all of Sunset’s expressions, her happy smiles and wide-eyed stares at light fixtures. Often, she points at lights that are in unique shapes, making us both laugh as we walk. “Look! That one looks like an elf!” she excitedly exclaims, pointing at a light fixture on top of one of the trees. “Although, from this angle, it kind of looks like he’s sitting on the tree… That must be painful.” Both of us giggle at her joke, shaking my head slightly at the absurd placement of the light. “You’re right though~ This is the perfect way to destress after finals~” Her hand holds mine slightly tighter, a bright smile appearing on her face. It almost feels wrong of me to be here with her… I invited her here for what she thinks is the selfless reason to destress from school, but the real reason I brought us here is much more selfish… I decided… Tonight is the night. No more sleepless nights and days of denial. Sunset is my best friend in the whole world, but I need to tell her this secret I’ve been keeping for far too long. No matter what happens, at least I will be able to get the secret off my chest. Even if she doesn’t accept it, then she will be able to go forward without a selfish friend like me… No more lies and smoke screens. She deserves the truth… Even if it ends up breaking our friendship… All of this pressure makes it a little hard to enjoy the lights. At least I’ll have this final moment with her… Stopping in the middle of the sidewalk, Sunset comes to a halt and looks at me with a confused expression, slowly turning her body to me. “Is something wrong…?” she asks me quietly, her hand still holding onto mine. Almost every ounce of sadness she had from her breakup with Flash is entirely gone, her old self shining through the aftermath. I’m… so happy that it didn’t end up changing her. LIke it did with me… “Listen, Sunset.” I slowly pull my hand away from hers, knowing how this might go. The bright lights reflect off the snow, making Sunset seem like she’s in wonderland… She’s so… beautiful. “I didn’t actually bring you here to destress… I… wanted to spend time with you.” The noise of water running from the fountain nearby makes me feel a little nervous… Like time itself is telling me to get on with it. To hurry up and ruin this friendship as quickly as possible. Every ounce of my body tells me to not say anything more, but I know I have to… I need to… “I missed being with you and… I needed to tell you something.” Sunset’s confused expression only grows, her eyes locked with mine. “The night you broke up with Flash… You got really drunk and you ended up kissing me.” Sunset’s eyes quickly widen and she opens her mouth as if to say something, only for me to hold my hand up to stop her. I still have more to say… “And ever since then, I haven’t been able to get it off my mind… Sunset, I know I can be kind of a jerk, always teasing you for anything you do.” Taking a step back onto the snow, I can’t help but look at the ground, avoiding her gaze. I’m barely able to summon the strength to take my next breath for my words. “But I can’t stop thinking about that night… I can’t stop wishing that maybe things could be different. Maybe we could hold each other again and maybe I could feel how I felt that night again… I realized that… my feelings are complicated.” Looking into Sunset’s eyes once more, I can feel the weight of the world bearing down on me as she stares at me. “Sunset, I… I want to be with you… I miss you when you’re not around. I can hardly sleep and I always want to see your happy smile. I’ve tried so hard to make my stupid brain stop thinking these things, but I can’t… I never want to see you heartbroken again and I…” A knot forms in my throat, my whole body seemingly sweating. I can’t help but feel dizzy even thinking about saying those words… Why did I have to fall in love with you…? Why does this have to be so confusing? I need to tell you and yet my body makes it so hard to do so… “I… I love you, Sunset… I just want you to be happy and I keep… wishing to be with you…” Tears slowly fall down my cheeks, my mind already anticipating the worst from her. I can’t imagine life without her as my friend… She’s done so much for me and she means the world to me in so little time. The thought of losing her completely breaks me… A siren who’s supposed to be strong, just wishing for a mortal woman to stay with her… I’m sorry… I needed to tell you… Sunset’s eyes look towards the ground, turning away from me slightly as she tries to think of something to say. Conflict is written across her face, only making my mind run wild. “To be honest… I’ve felt a… similar way. Every time we’ve been around each other recently,” she tells me quietly, looking towards the fountain with a soft expression. “You’ve always been so kind and welcoming… You’re the only friend close enough that I can rely on.” Her eyes slowly look back towards me, a small smile coming to her lips. “How could I not feel… attached to you? You’re perfect in so many ways, Adagio…” The wind slowly blows her hair, making the lights shimmer off of it. “You were there for me after Flash… You helped me get back to my feet and realize what life is all about. Taking chances.” Holding her hand out in front of her, her smile only gets bigger. Her eyes lock with mine and I can see just how peaceful she feels. “Promise not to break my heart?” Looking down at her hand, I suddenly realize what exactly she means by her statement. What this whole gesture means… She didn’t hate my confession… She doesn’t hate me. Instantly, I can feel tears begin to form, taking her hand in my own as quickly as I can. Nodding, I feel the biggest smile come to me in my whole life, my heart pounding against my chest. “I promise~” Sunset’s arm quickly pulls me into a hug, holding me against her as tightly as she can. Within moments, both of us stain our shoulders with tears of joy, Sunset’s hands gripping onto me for dear life. She means so much to me… I would never want to break her heart. I only want to see her smile, as long as I can. “I love you too, Adagio~”
