Mask

by DeathToPonies

Rating: teen
Tags: Tragedy, Death, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Rainbow Dash, Sad
Length: 1283

Rainbow Dash is fine.

Rainbow Dash is fine.

Written for the Quills and Sofas Poetry Slam Contest on 9/9/22. My prompt poem can be found in the authors notes.

EDIT: FEATURED! Told you I’d make it, mom.

I've decided not to tag a key story element for the purpose of keeping spoilers down. This tag is not anything conventionally disgusting, anything to do with snuff, or any fetish. If you are sensitive to dark content, please view the tag below:

Trigger warning: Suicide

Published 2022-09-09 23:30:00 UTC
Last updated 2022-09-09 23:30:00 UTC

Mask

Boom, Crash.

The winds howled, the thunder crashed, the wave shook beneath her. Rainbow Dash - a striking bolt of color against the endless dark and stormy ocean beneath her - floated in place hundreds of feet above the sea, her hair and fur soaked and violently blowing in the gale. Her body remained unmoving, her strong wings keeping her in place despite nature's rage around her. Her face stayed equally resolute, unaffected by her surroundings, as if frozen in its current state of apathy.

"I'm fine," she spoke to herself in a dead tone, her voice nigh inaudible over the deafening roars of the crashing waves and thundering rain. A single tear dripped from her eye - but even if anyone was around to notice, it would have just blended into the rain.

"I'm fine," she repeated, a bit louder this time - this time, she could hear herself. She could feel her heart rate start to increase, breathing heavier and heavier. A massive wave rose in the distance with a shattering roar, nearly reaching her height, before falling down back to the water with a mighty splash.

"I'm FINE," she growled, even louder this time, as if she was upset that the waves couldn't hear her. As if nature itself was responding, the thunder, rain, and ocean became even louder, and Dash, ever resolute, became nearly engulfed by the storm - nearly every sense bombarded by the winds and rain. Against all reason, she closed her eyes. As her vision faded to darkness, the sounds and sensations of the outside world began to fade.

"I'm fine," she spoke with complete clarity, in a calm, and quiet voice. For just a few more moments, it was completely silent.

"Are y'sure?" finally replied the warm, firm voice she was expecting. Rainbow Dash slowly opened her eyes - not to the horrifying, crashing storm in the middle of the ocean, but to a calm and quiet farmhouse. Laying in the bed, positioned in a way that the rays of sunshine cutting through the window and trees illuminated her in angelic fashion, was Applejack, who despite her startlingly weak appearance in the moment had just spoken with a rather concerned tone that matched her expression.

"Yes, I...I'm sure," stuttered Rainbow Dash, in an absolutely not-so-sure tone. Applejack's mouth slowly curled into a half smile, her weak eyes fluttering a bit before resting in a caring position.

"Y'don't have to lie to me, Dash," she spoke softly, "I know this is gonna be hard."

"No, it's not!" insisted Rainbow Dash, putting her hoof down and speaking as earnestly as she could, "I'm gonna be fine! Really! I mean, I'm..."

The blue pony slowly moved from her upright position down to a somber, sitting one, looking down and to the side.

"...I'm gonna miss you, sure...but..."

She blinked, fighting away a tear. Applejack was silent, respectfully letting her finish.

"...I can't let anypony know that. I'm....I'm the captain of the Wonderbolts. Twilight, the others. They're gonna need me..."

Applejack sighed, looking away from Rainbow Dash, her expression changing to one of more sincere sorrow.

"It's...like a mask," said Rainbow Dash, desperate to explain, "Like I mask th, that I always have to wear. All the time."

Applejack turned slowly - as if movement itself hurt at this point - to face her. Above anything else, any other emotions Rainbow Dash felt in the current moment - she couldn't believe how sad Applejack looked.

Boom, Crash.

In an entirely different memory, months from now, she was at a royal event with Twilight.

"I'm fine," she remembered herself speak to a pony who's face she could no longer remember, part of a conversation she had completely forgotten.

Boom, Crash.

Six weeks later. Rarity's birthday.

The spirits, high. The mood, immaculate.

A stray apple, sitting on a table.

"I'm fine," spoken to oneself.

Boom, Crash.

Fluttershy was getting married. Everypony had spoken.

"If only she were here," Pinkie had sighed.

"Pinkie! You can't just..." Twilight had warned.

"I'm fine," Dash repeated.

Boom, Crash.

Black void. She couldn't remember...

Was that sad face...

"I'm fine."

...Was that the last thing she remembered about her?

"That's fine."

"Rainbow Dash," she heard the orange pony's voice creep into her mind.

"I'm FINE!" she shrieked, suddenly jerking herself back to reality. In an instant, loud, shrieking winds surrounded her, the waves louder than ever. Agonizing, painful thoughts flooded her mind. She didn't NEED Applejack. She didn't NEED anyone. And even if she did, she DIDN'T HAVE TO SHOW IT. In a fury, she flew as fast as she could into the sky above, away from the gale and towards the stars. In that one moment of peace, everything was quiet once more.

"You see that one?"

A final memory crept back.

"Which one?" Rainbow Dash asked, laying in the middle of a quiet, peaceful field, in the middle of the night.

"That one," replied Applejack, snuggled up next to her, pointing at the brightest star in the sky, "That one's real pretty."

Rainbow Dash really took it in - the brilliance of the shining star, and all those around it. Crap, she thought to herself. You gotta say something. Gotta say something cute, or cool. She blinked, noticing Applejack out of the corner of her eye gaze at her with loving eyes. Can't mess this up....

"Y'know..." she started, her voice a little wary, "usually, when I look up at the stars, everything feels so far away. But right now, when I'm here, with you?"

The atmospheric noise was a beautiful cadence of cicadas and gentle wind. From a distance, the two would have only been visible from silhouettes lit by moonlight.

"When I'm here with you, it all feels so close."

The silhouettes's faces came together.

The same bright star shone in the sky, this same night. Taking one last look at it, Dash finally let a full tear develop and drip from her face, now several miles above the clouds.

"I'm fine," she whispered, dropping backwards gracefully, before transitioning into a face-forward spin, straight towards the clouds. The wind and noise increased around her, building up and up like a volcano. The air around her started to stretch, her front hooves pushing forward as if the air itself was fabric to be broken. She burst through the clouds, the rain and ocean all around her once more.

"I'M FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNEEEE!!!!!!" she screamed as loud as she could before breaking the sound barrier, completely vertical - a brilliant circular rainbow exploding from her position around her, spreading a wave of color and light across the desolate ocean. Dash closed her eyes and smiled once more, before slamming directly into the ocean at supersonic speeds.

Abrupt cut. Silence.

"A mask, huh?" Applejack's voice came from the void once more.

"I just don't want anypony to know how weak I really am. Especially....without you."

Author's Note

This was written for the flash-fiction contest held by Quills and Sofas on 9/9/22.

My prompt was the poem We Wear the Mask by Paul Laurence Dunbar.

We wear the mask that grins and lies,
It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes,—
This debt we pay to human guile;
With torn and bleeding hearts we smile,
And mouth with myriad subtleties.

Why should the world be over-wise,
In counting all our tears and sighs?
Nay, let them only see us, while
We wear the mask.

We smile, but, O great Christ, our cries
To thee from tortured souls arise.
We sing, but oh the clay is vile
Beneath our feet, and long the mile;
But let the world dream otherwise,
We wear the mask!