Lost but not Missing

Pain.

Horrible, horrible pain.

Echoing screeches and distorted music.

A body barely able to stay together.

And suddenly, silence.

—————————————

My head feels heavy.

Head? I never had a head before. I hear a voice… It seems worried. A gentle touch on my side rolls me over onto my belly. It feels like… a hoof. Mother? No, I didn't have a mother… I was a mistake made from scattered code and held together in a void of glitches.

I'm so confused. My own thoughts are barely making sense, not that they ever did before. The voice sounds female. Beautiful, compared to the cacophony of howls I was hearing before. A twinge of pain passes through my head as I hold a hand up to the skull I'm wearing. I can hear her gasp in relief as I do.

"O-Oh my! You're awake, little one. Please, keep lying down, I'll go get you something to drink. You must be awfully thirsty after being asleep for so long," She says.

I struggle to find words to respond. I don't remember how to speak. I open my eyes, before squinting as sunlight shines down on me.

Sunlight? I've never seen sunlight before…

I hear her hoofsteps grow quieter. She's behind me, I can tell. I hear her opening things.

I sit up, as I open my eyes, holding a hand up to shade them so I can adjust. I'm lying on a bed. It's comfortable, and matches the surroundings. Green floor, brown walls… So many colors I haven't seen in the sea of gray, white and black that I called my home. I take in every detail I can. It's not often I get to see such a place.

The hoofsteps get closer again as I see an odd yellow Ponyta with a pink mane come into view, holding a glass of water. She looks concerned, but seeing my eyes open, she gives me a shy smile.

"My name's Fluttershy. Do you have a name, little one?" She asks, using one of her wings to try and place the glass in my hands. I flinch away, I don't want to hurt her.

"O-Oh, is something wrong? Did I move too fast? I didn't mean to scare you." She yelps, flinching back as well from my sudden movement.

I want to answer her, but words don't come to me. I grip the bone in my hand tighter, shaking my head. Flashes of memories pass before my eyes, bits and pieces.

"A-Are you okay? Do you need medicine, little one?" Asks the Ponyta, now more concerned than startled. I shake my head again, dropping the bone and reaching towards the glass. I can't remember how long it's been since someone gave me something, instead of using my unnatural curse for their own gain.

The Ponyta seems to understand, slowly moving her wing to let me take the water. I nod, hesitantly grabbing it, expecting it to glitch away into nothingness the moment I touch it… But it doesn't. I don't know whether to feel sickeningly worried or extraordinarily relieved.

"There you go. Drink up, but make sure you drink slowly! Take sips, no big gulps." She says, retracting her wing.

I do so. Something about this Ponyta puts me a little more at ease. It's not a feeling I'm used to. It’s like some form of strange talent… I don’t understand.

“Are you hungry, little one? Breakfast is just about to-” A prominent dinging goes off in the kitchen, causing my ears to twitch from the sound. The winged Ponyta giggles, as she trots towards the doorway. “Perfect timing. Hmmm… I wonder if you’re a herbivore or carnivore? Perhaps an omnivore?” She appears to shake the thought from her mind, moving her head from side to side. “Come with me, please.”

I slide my legs off the table, noting my extremely small stature. I remember this form from the letters and numbers, lying unused, abandoned forever… Something I wish had happened to me. I can’t help but wonder if this equine has the same plans as the rest of my ‘saviors’. It’s hard to hope even a little after so long.

As if overhearing my mental hesitation, the equine peeked her head around the corner. “Do you want me to carry you, little one? Oh! Wait a second, are you a baby?”

I grimace, shaking my head as I drop off the table. I want to trust her, but I can’t. Anything she does for me might be considered something I owe her back for, even the water might be too much… I don’t want to be used again.

As I land, I feel my weakened legs crumple. It seems I can’t walk very well.

I hear her hoofsteps rapidly approaching me, followed by a pair of wings lifting me up. I mentally curse my luck… Just another thing she’ll make me pay her back for. I can’t help but struggle a little, trying to tell her to put me down. I can figure out how to walk, I just need time.

She doesn’t seem to pay me much mind. She continues trotting into some kind of kitchen, but I don’t remember seeing one this… orderly. It’s fairly primitive, especially since she seems to stack rocks as a replacement for a stove.

She places me down on some kind of picnic table as she trots to the stones and pulls out a piece of meat. I reflexively scrunch up as she places it down in front of me. I’m perfectly capable of eating it, and many Pokemon do eat meat, but I can only see the victims of my curse, writhing in pain as I devour them without meaning to…

I slam the bone in my paw against the plate and send it flying onto the floor as more memories pour through my mind, each worse than the last.

“Eeep!”

I stare at her in confusion, the memories fading as I watch her hide behind the table. I must have hurt her, she might just want untold riches but at least she’s trying… No. I refuse to feel like I owe this pony anything.

“I-i’m so sorry. M-maybe we can try fruits and vegetables, yes, that must be it.”

I narrowed my eyes, watching as she made her way over to the cold storage that serves as her fridge. I really hope those memories don’t come back for a little while. She pulls out another bowl, filled with what looks like carrots. I don’t like how that Buneary is staring at me angrily…

“Angel, be nice. I promise to make you a new bowl after the baby has been fed.”

“I don’t care if it, them, whatever, is a baby! That’s MY food!”

I am starting to feel a bit regretful about taking up Fluttershy’s offer.

The edgy Buneary turns to me. “Oh, I’ll make you pay for stealing my food!” They shouted at me. I don’t know what I did to deserve it… It reminds me of that one trainer who used me to revive his dead Charizard.

“Oh dear.” You know, I missed her voice. “Angel! That’s very inappropriate.”

I stare at the rabbit Pokemon in a deadpan manner, before reciting something from memory.

“8̸2̸0̸2̶5̷8̸4̶0̴ ̴0̵0̸8̷5̵,” I say, mentally cringing at the sound of my own horribly distorted voice. Some things never change I suppose. As expected, a pile of cheri berries appear in front of me, brought into existence by my curse.

I watch as the Buneary and my “caretaker’s” mouths drop open like a Golbat on a bad day. I may have gone a little far, but I can take care of myself, and they need to know I’m not helpless.

“Wh-what d-did you j-just do, l-little one?” The equine questions, seeming to cower in fear. I feel confused… Usually, most Trainers or Pokemon that drag me out of the depths expect me to be able to do that. It’s the main reason why I’m used so much. Infinite money, infinite items, rare Pokemon… Resurrecting the dead. There isn’t much I can’t do, so why is this one acting like she doesn’t know who I am?

I glare at her with narrowed eyes, taking a pawful of berries and chewing them as I observe her face. She seems to shake off her momentary terror. The Buneary, meanwhile, appears to be trying to pass for a stuffed doll, which causes it to get picked up by some kind of Poochyena and dragged outside. As usual, it starts screaming bloody murder, slamming its’ front paws on the canine’s muzzle to try and get free.

“Hmmm… I doubt Twilight and the Princesses would know anything about you. But what you did just now, especially what you are. I wonder if Discord knows about your kind?”

My confusion rises with every word. I can already tell this is going to be another long surface visit…