Money, Murder, and Marzipan

Now, there are four critical things no creature in this so-called syndicate can ever do. Otherwise, nasty things will happen to them. One, you can't betray the syndicate to the authorities. Two, you can't rob, hurt, or intimidate a Bookkeeper. Three, you can't tell somepony all the rules.

I would tell you about my visit the next day to the Bookkeepers, but if I were a criminal, I could get into a lot of trouble with my coworkers for giving too many details away about where they store their money– never mess with a pony's money that they are sure is stored away safely. That's not to say that members of this syndicate never rob one another because they do, but when it's with the bookkeepers, it is off-limits. You can rob a shipment of money when it's en route to the Bookkeepers. You can steal money from somepony once they have withdrawn funds and have left the safe zone near the Bookkeepers. You never go after the money when it is with the Bookkeepers because then you are going after everypony's money, and you make a lot of ponies very angry. The Bookkeepers don't allow I.O.Us– you have to withdraw or deposit actual bits; it keeps us all honest and keeps bosses from doing their own creative accounting. They have a short zone of safety near their office where people can't be robbed but set one hoof beyond, and you aren't their problem anymore. It's considered bad taste to rob somepony immediately once they leave that zone, but I can't say it never happens if there is enough bad blood. We generally don't rob each other unless some bosses are at war with one another. Where is this zone of money safety and accompanying offices? Let's just say it wasn't where you would expect ponies controlling a syndicate's pursestrings to operate.

What I can tell you is I was floored by exactly how much money I had.

"I can remodel the restaurant, enroll my brother in the School for Gifted Unicorns, and still have money left over," I said as I gaped at the listing of my account funds while standing off in an alley.

"Work pays well," Stick said with a nod. "Hey, and since you're a noble, ponies are less likely to ask questions about where you suddenly got all your money. Lucky you."

That made me feel sour. "I wish they wouldn't call me Little Baroness."

"I told you, be happy. There are way worse names. Do you think I chose to be called Stick?"

I looked at him. "You didn't?"

He shook his head. "Nope, Stone and I got named together. Our first boss joked that we were a romantic couple, and he named Stone as a crass reference to his, um…stones, if you know what I mean. He named me Stick because…you see where this is going, right?"

I blinked. "Oh, I wouldn't have thought that. I would have thought about sticks and stones might break-"

He shook his head. "Yeah, nothing so dignified as that. Anyway, we knew each other already, so we know our real names, but when dealing with anyone related to our profession, we just go by Stick and Stone and keep our real names private. I advise you to do so too, Little Baroness."

"If I have to keep that name, can you at least drop the Little?" I pleaded.

"For casual use, sure," he agreed. "But as far as the Count, the Bookkeepers, and the rest of the organization are concerned, you're the Little Baroness."

"What organization?" I asked, curious about everything associated with what had recently happened to me.

He shrugged. "It deals with stuff that the crown frowns upon. You know, gambling on credit, really high-interest loans for ponies who normally wouldn't be able to get a loan, narcotics and questionable medicines for the desperate, protection money, providing a market for goods of questionable acquisition, brothels, illegal magic spells, and trinkets, and selling mammalian meat."

I felt a bit green. "Mammalian meat? I know some ponies eat fish, and there is the rare pony who will eat a bird, but mammalian…do you mean pigs? I heard ponies sometimes sell pigs to griffins."

"Not pigs," Stick answered. "You might not want to know. Easier not to think about it. It isn't just griffins that buy it, either. There's some sick ponies out there. It isn't pony meat, normally, if that makes you feel better."

I resisted the urge to wretch. "I hadn't even thought it was ponies. Crap. Should you even be telling me this?"

He chuckled as he looked out of the alley at the street. There was nopony close to us. "You got paid for work and have an account with the Bookkeepers. Like it or not, you're part of the organization now. How deep you get is up to you. You can just sit pretty on your newfound money if you want, but you still should know what it is you're connected to, even if you keep that connection what it is now. Once you're in, the best you can do is be dormant; there's no getting out."

I looked down at my receipt for my account. This was blood money, and that, understandably, made me uneasy.

"Was he a bad guy? Is the world better without him?" I asked, hoping to soothe my conscience.

"Yeah, you could say that. He killed a lot of creatures in his day. Oftentimes, ones that didn't deserve it," Stick answered with a grunt. "Don't worry about him; he's history."

You might be wondering at this time what types of things you have to do to get somepony to hire a pony to kill you. I'm only guessing since I've never been involved with anything of the sort, but if I had to say, the first thing that comes to mind is breaking any of those rules I mentioned. Now, that wouldn't be it. Local bosses, both major and minor, get into fights, and there will be plenty of work available during those fights as ponies in each group are targeted. Then there's ponies that refuse to pay debts and make it clear roughing them up or intimidating them won't work. Those ones will only have work arranged for them if they are known to actually have the money they owe. There's no point in killing a poor pony. You just beat the snot out of them for being stupid, doing some permanent damage like removing a limb, and take what you can get. After that, they are mostly safe, provided they don't run to the authorities. They'll never get so much as a quarter-bit from us again after that nor be welcomed to any of our fine establishments. If they happen to come up with the money later, after we have delimbed them…well…they did make promises, and that's our money.

Stick took me home, leaving me as he said he needed to check on Stone. I don't know for sure if those two are a couple, as their first boss insinuated. It is bad manners to dig into others' personal lives if they don't volunteer information, not unless they have a contract on their heads. They could each have wives and kids for all I knew, but they did spend a lot of time together. Whether they were just best friends or best friends, I'll never know. I'll die before I can find out.

I sat in the living room for some time, drawing new layouts for my damaged dining area. It had gotten relatively regular updates when my parents were still around, but I had never had the money to do the same. Despite everything, I was kind of excited. Can you blame me? It was blood money, but it was a lot of money, and I was going to be able to actually do things. You're a princess and a personal student of one before that. You've never had to worry about how you'll pay for something as insignificant as remodeling or school for a family member, so you probably don't understand.

Speaking of school for my family, my brother walked in as I was starting to try to plan a budget. He froze in his tracks almost immediately upon seeing me, and I could see all his muscles tense.

I flicked an ear as I returned his gaze. "Something wrong?" My eyes narrowed as I noticed new scuff marks on one of his forelegs, with tiny bits of dried blood indicating cuts beneath his fur, "Were they bullying you again?"

He took a hasty step backward and jumped in fright when he bumped into the door, letting out a yelp.

I saw red in response to seeing him in this state. "What did they do to you?! I don't care if I get arrested; I'll beat the crap out of all of those snot-nosed–"

"Nothing!" my brother shouted in fear. "I tripped on the schoolhouse stairs and fell down. They laughed at me for it, but it wasn't their fault I tripped. You don't have to hurt anypony!"

I looked at his leg again. I supposed that could be the result of a trip and fall. "You aren't lying to me, are you? If they hurt you-"

He shook his head. "I'm not lying. I really did trip and fall. You can ask the schoolmaster. It was embarrassing. It hurt my pride more than my leg. The laughing wasn't that bad. They were more focused on hurrying home."

That there was laughing at all instead of them going to help him and see if he was okay was enough to keep me in a sour mood, but I suppose it wasn't worth chasing those brats down.

He kept staring fearfully at me. "Sis, is something wrong? Something doesn't feel right about you since yesterday. I know you aren't a changeling or anything like that, but I can't help feeling something's off when I look at you. I almost believe you would kill those foals."

I may have been young and ignorant of many things, but at this point, it was starting to sink in that my brother knew what I had done. Maybe not know-know, but there was a feeling about me, the same feeling I had felt about so many of those ponies who had been at the restaurant yesterday. My brother might not know in his head that I was a killer, but his instincts somehow betrayed me. It was a gut-wrenching revelation. Would he feel like this every time he saw me? Would he never want to be around me again? What was I supposed to do? I couldn't tell him the truth. He wouldn't just feel like I was a monster if I did; he would know it.

It was time to make some hard decisions and reevaluate how I would spend my ill-gotten gains.

"Something happened yesterday, a fight at the restaurant, a bad one, and it is going to be closed until I get things fixed," I said, trying to avoid lying more than I had to. "I'm getting compensation for what happened that will cover repairs. The count feels bad that our business was wrecked."

He blinked. "Did anypony get hurt? Why didn't you mention it last night?"

Heh, how was I supposed to answer those questions?

"I was distracted by you thinking I was a changeling if you recall," I said, flashing my big sister grin. "There were some injuries, but nothing you need to worry about. This is a blessing in disguise for us."

Confusion seemed to override his earlier fear. "How is that a blessing?"

I stood up and was grateful he didn't react badly to my change in position. "We're being extra well compensated, and with the extra money, I can not only do the repairs, but I can enroll you in the School for Gifted Unicorns. You don't have to deal with those bullies anymore."

His face lit up for a moment, but just a moment. "It will be great not to deal with them at school, but I still have to deal with them around the neighborhood. They might pick on me more for going to that school."

I nodded. "Which is why I want you to stay in the school dorms."

"You can't afford that! How much are you being compensated?" he asked with a gasp.

He was half right. You again wouldn't understand. You were given a free ride when you were a student. The costs of staying in the school dorms are higher than enrollment costs. Dorm space is very limited. I had some concerns that there might be a waiting list, but I could get him in a hotel close to the school if that were the case. It would be expensive, whether it was the dorms or the hotel. Even with how much money I had gotten, I would need to reduce the scale of the remodel and would need to invest my profits from the business to keep him there for future semesters. Still, it was better than having to see that look in his eyes when he saw me and to give him the future he deserved.

"I'll work it out, bro," I assured him. "This is a better life for you.

"I see a critical problem with that plan," Princess Twilight interrupted.

I smiled at her. "Oh, maybe I will put some heavy plot armor around it so it doesn't become a problem. After all, this is my story."

She smirked back at me. "After all the points you have stressed to me? I think not. You overlooked a big detail back then."

With a grin and a shrug, I answered, "Maybe. Experience is the best teacher, and I was very inexperienced with this stuff. I still am since I've never been involved. You must be as smart as they say if you picked up on it without experience. Or do you have experience? Are you secretly a crime lord, dear princess? It would explain so much. I've always believed that corruption must go all the way to the top."

"You really know nothing about me, do you?" Princess Twilight asked in a sad tone.

She's definitely the top banana, Mama.

Why do you say that? I was only trying to needle her. I wasn't serious.

How can a ruler be that blind to what is happening in her cities? In her city?

We see the world we want to see and ignore inconvenient truths, Feathers.

I continued to smile at the princess. "Maybe I don't, but I'm guessing you know what is coming next if you already figured out what I was too dumb to see."