Author's Note

Hi everyone! I'm honestly surprised my first little fic had garnered some attention. I appreciate all comments as they help me understand and grow the story. :) Also this is a bit random but i have decided to change the story's pov to 3rd person as i find i prefer to read fic's that the pov and its alot easier for me to write in, so sorry for the sudden change. This chapter is the start of some pretty dark themes, so warning for self harm and attempting sa is in this chapter. Thank you so much for reading :)

Chapter 2. The Beginning of Despair

“Oh~ sunset~ ahaha~.” A dark deep voice mockingly laughed.
“That’s so cute you thought you actually deserved friends! Don't make me laugh!” the scarlet creature continued to mock.

“Please. Please just leave me alone.” a weak defeated voice wheezed out.

“Ahaha, how cute. It’s simply a taste of your own medicine. You can give the heat but you can't it? How much more pathetic can you get?”

“I-I-” the amber girl weeped out.

“Die Sunset, both you and I know that's what everyone wants. The humans, the ponies, your past mentor, Twilight! Everyone!” the demon’s menacing voice beginning to shout at her, getting in the former unicorn's face.
“Here you are all alone. That's how it has always been and how it always will be. There is absolutely nothing here for you anymore, in any world. You can't go back to equastria, the princesses hate you. In this world everyone hates you.” The girl had been reduced to a sobbing puddle in the dark void.

Sunset slowly fluttered her eyes open not wanting to admit to being awake. Not that sleeping was much better at this point. It’s not the first time the crimson fiery demon has haunted her dreams.
The amber skinned girl slowly rose from her bed throwing the sheets off her as she swung her legs over the bed, only to sit at the edge of the bed. She sat in silence, the only sounds being the apartment creaking, her own shallow breathing and the humming of Ray’s tank. Sunset looked to the bottom floor from her loft. She sighed and stood up, making her way towards the bathroom.

Upon her entrance she took a quick glance in the mirror, deciding to take a longer look, she hated what she saw. A pale, dull, lifeless form started back at her. Her body became gaunt and caven. Her eyes were dull and empty. Her mind, numb and broken. ‘You’re disgusting’ her thoughts reminded her. As a sigh left her lips she opened her mirror cabinet to retrieve her toothbrush and paste. ‘I kinda need to take a shower… I just don't have the energy this morning.’ With that she made her way past the blue couch into the kitchen. ‘I don't feel like eating. It’s too much energy right now.’ Sunset took a look at the clock above the stove. 5:45 am. ‘Great. I still have an hour before I have to head to school. At least it's friday.’ Sunset stood for a moment. Unsure what to do with herself. ‘I kinda want to draw.’ That led to the teen fetching her sketchbook and colored pencils. The red and gold haired girl began to make a sketch. She quickly learned after picking up this hobby three years ago, her favorite thing to create images of are landscapes. From underwater scenes to volcanic eruptions lighting the sky. Something about seeing the colors come together to create fictional and nonfictional nature scenes conjured simply from what her mind made was like a whole new magic of itself. As the tired teen began the fill in a green bush the weak lead broke. After a ‘tch’ the girl reached over for her pencil sharpener. As she rotated the pencil across the sharp blade she couldn't help but feel a longing. Her body tingled and her eyes started at the gleaming sharp metal. She didn't know why but she desperately wanted to get that razor out and use it on her skin. She had never thought of self harm before, it's practically unheard of in her home world. Yes the teen caught and heard little snippets of the self harming epidemic the adults seemed to be so worried about but never cared much about it. Yes, she thought it was weird. Crazy. Possibly even unnecessary. Starting at this blade and how easy it was to shave the pencil, how her skin screamed for the tension in her to be released and how the blade would bring that… maybe… she does understand. This caused the girl to stand up, grab her mini screwdriver from its drawer and stuck the head into the nail’s indention. The slightly erratic breathing teen twisted the screwdriver in the nail until it came loose, along with the razor. She picked it up. She stared at it with wide uneasy eyes. Her arms tingled for the pain about to be inflicted on them. Impulsively the unicorn turned human dug the razor into the skin of her left wrist. Crimson liquid quickly followed suit. Sunset’s entire body trembled and she let out a gasp of relief from the tension in her being slowly trickled out. The distraught teen let out a small laugh as tears began to roll down her cheeks. Sunset continued. The razor made its mark with more and more scarring cuts, each relieving the girl, each causing twice as many tears than the ones before them.

The event of self harm lasted the girl a full thirty minutes. After cleaning up her new wounds and her tear and snot ridden face she realized the time was now 6:15. ‘Fuck i’m so gonna be late for school. Whatever, that might be for the best.’ She sauntered out of her bathroom and up the stairs of her loft to her bed where she changed out of her pajamas and into her everyday attire, consisting of her classic leather jacket, a magenta shirt adorning her cutie mark down to her orange skirt with a yellow and magenta strip and her black boots. Sunset then walked over to her ray of sunshine where she fed him a breakfast of silk worms and gave him a pat on the head.
“Good bye my little Ray, I’ll see you later, be a good boy.” The gecko looked up at her, gave what appeared to be a smile and continued his meal. The amber girl smiled fondled at him and then made her way down the lofts steps and out the front door.

Sunset Shimmer opened the front doors to Canterlot High School and made her way to the principal's office, as she was twenty minutes late to class. Surely taking time on her walk up to the school from her factory turned apartment. When reaching the principal's door Sunset gave a knock.
“Come in.” an airy regal voice called.
Seeing Principal Celestia always has been difficult for Sunset. The ivory woman reminded her so much of the royal mentor she had let down. Sunset took a deep breath in an attempt to calm her nerves as she opened the door and entered.
“Oh, Sunset Shimmer, just the person I need to talk to.” The principal stated as she folded her near white pink hands together for her chin to rest on.
“I’m sorry I'm late, I won't let it happen again.” the teen said with exhaustion.
“It’s your first offense of tardiness in three years so I’ll let it slide. Now we need to talk about your ‘anon-a-miss’ account. It needs to be taken down immediately. I'm not quite sure why you decided to start up this act again and lose your progress but I won't allow it to go this time Ms.Shimmer.” Celestia stated. The amber teen simply gave a blank tired stare during the tiny lecture.
“It's not my account, Principal Celestia.” the tired girl stated flatley.
“Then who’s is it?”
“I have no clue. Trust me if I did I would have stopped them already. It's made me lose my friends.” Sunset said with the latter of the sentence being said in almost a whisper.
“...I see. To be frank I’m not quite sure if I trust your telling the truth or not. Can you prove to me it's not you?” The leader of the school questioned.
“I dont have the MyStables app downloaded on my phone or computer.” The girl began to pull out the said objects and showed the principal their freedom of the social media platform.
“Hmm, alright. Luna was right. This is a complicated situation. As of now I believe you, if you hear anything of the real perpetrator don't hesitate to report it.” Principal Celstia said. Sunset, being dismissed with a late pass from the principal, began to make her way to her locker. ‘Great. More degrading graffiti.’ The girl rolled her eyes and opened her locker, receiving her needed supplies. Stomping her boots down the hall and into her first class of the day she plopped into her seat and started taking notes.

Sunset’s classes rolled somewhat quickly with her mind no longer allowing her to focus. Only being able to think of how her frie- former friends hate her, how the whole school hates her and how she hates herself. As the lunch bell rang, Sunset had made the decision to skip and wait it out in the library. Making her way up the shelves where no one goes, more specifically where Princess Twilight had stayed during the formal. Sitting down on the bed of books Sunset pulled out her journal. She had felt its magical vibrations all morning but had ignored them as she didn't have the energy to think of responses to the frantic princess.
‘Hey Twilight, Sorry it took me a while to respond, school has kept me busy this morning.’ Sunset leaned back with the journal in her lap. Her fresh self-inflicted wounds gave a throbbing sore pain to remind Sunset of what she had done that morning. She didn't mind. The pain almost brought her…comfort? Yea, comfort, a reminder of what she deserved.
‘Hiya Sunset! That's fine, I totally understand. How are you doing this morning? Have things been okay?’ The Princess of friendship replied.
‘Yea, Haven't had any trouble with anyone.’ The former unicorn wrote back purposely leaving out her new unhealthy development.
‘Oh! That's wonderful! Maybe this whole thing is starting to dye down and everyone is letting it go.’ Twilight wrote with hopeful optimism.
‘Yea maybe.’ With that Sunset closed her journal ready to take a nap. The journal gave another vibration, telling Sunset someone still wanted to talk to her. The girl couldn't find it in her to care right now. She laid down on the book bed and quickly fell asleep.

The amber girl's eyes shot open. In front of her was a pile of books with rows of shelves holding even more novels. ‘Oh shit, what time is it?’ The teen grabbed her phone from her leather jacket pocket. 12:25. ‘Dear Celestia, I slept through a whole class period?’ The bell signifying the transition to the last class of the day rang out, allowing a sea of students to fill the halls. Sunset made her way out of the library, walking down the hall to her locker. In her journey many students gave harsh shoves and pushes to her, eventually leading her to fall to the ground. Recollecting herself and getting to her locker, the amber skinned teen exchanged her books and made her way to her class. As she looked up while entering the door an ivory fashionista and the distraught teen held slight eye contact. After earning a grimace from Rarity, Sunset made her way to the back of the class and watched the clock tick by making depressing doodles.

As the final bell rang Sunset retrieved her things from her locker and walked out of the school's doors with more shoves, dirty looks and pencil jabs accompanying her. ‘Well I’d say today was a pretty successful day of avoiding and non-interaction. I really don't need anyone… and no one needs me.’ A sigh left her lips as she walked down the sidewalk to her factory. ‘I can't wait to cuddle with Ray. Maybe even indulge in cutting some more, it felt so… nice.’
Thirty minutes onto her walk, she began to enter the rundown part of Canterlot City.
“Why am I not surprised you live in such a shit hole?” a gravely female voice said.
Sunset turned around to see Glida and three boys accompanying her. She recognized them but didn't know their names. She did know they were major jocks and on the wrestling team. Sunset didn't give a reply. She only held her backpack’s strap tighter in her hand and gave a fearful look.
“What got nothing to say after that shit you posted?” Glida said. “I fucking told you to keep me out of your shit. And what do you go and do? Post something that had nothing to fucking do with you?” The bulkley girl shouted.
“I don't know what youre talking about. I told you it's not me.” Sunset said with a firm but slight nervousness in her voice.
“Bull-fucking-shit. How the fuck did you even get that shit anyways? How did you manage to find out about my crush on Rainbow Dash? Huh?!” Glida yelled.
“You know what, I don't care. I have a lesson to teach you right now anyways.” Glida gave a slight smirk. The three boys made their lounge at Sunset. The amber girl threw her hands above her head, preparing for the attack. Two of the boys held her by her arms and one with orange skin and brown hair threw a punch to her gut, knocking the wind out of her. In Sunset’s state of shock, Glida gave her a right hook to her face. Then another, then another, then another. Sunset in an attempt of retaliation kicked her legs towards Glida, knocking the threatening girl over with an oof. Sunset yanked her arms free from the lackeys holding her and made a dash for it.
“Get her!” Glida screamed. The boy with brown skin and blonde hair caught up to the panicking girl and pushed her to the ground, causing her to land head first to the ground causing her forehead to start bleeding. He tossed her over from her stomach to her back and sat his knees to her legs.
“You know, you're really hot for such a cunt. I wonder if yours is as pretty as your face.” the blonde said menacingly as he began to pull up her skirt. Sunset gave out a scream of terror as the she tried to move her legs from under him. Glida and the rest of the lackeys caught up realizing what was about to transpire.
“Hey, make sure I get my turn.” The brunette boy from before said.
“Me, too.” The other lakey said.
Glida made her way to the front and bent down to Sunsets face to grab the terrified girl's throat.
“This outta teach you.” Glida said as she pressed down on Sunsets windpipe. The amber girl tried to gasp for air as her legs felt the cold wind brush on them as her skirt had been completely pulled up. Sunset could feel nothing but terror as the buff blonde boy began to pull down her underwear.
“No… no..please.” the distressed teen tried to get out. A small shriek came out as the boy began to enter her. Sunset saw it as she tossed her bloody head to the side. Just a bit under a dumpster was a knife. She took the opportunity and head-butted the boy as hard as she could. With him falling back just enough she squeezed her way out from under him and Glida and leapt for the knife. Turning around she swings sporadically, swinging at anything near her.
“Fuck. You crazy bitch!” A boy with gray skin and black hair yelled.
“Stay the fuck away from me! All of you. I will kill you!” The terrified Sunset screamed.
Without weapons the three boys darted off.
“Fuck with us again. You won't be so lucky.” Glida said before taking off herself.
Sunset couldn't stop shaking as she stood there trying to process what just happened. The teen gave out a sob and dropped to her knees sobbing into her hands.