Author's Note

*SATIRE WARNING* This chapter contains material that I deemed too vulgar and unfit for the story in general, and ultimately had to remove completely. However, I felt compelled to share it, as some of you may expect this sort of writing in this kind of story. You have been warned. *You are now free of the aforementioned satire warning*

0. Sir Not Appearing In This Film

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Darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling darling darling dear darling dear darling darling