Shadow Sky - A Diary of Pain and Memories.

The police sirens sounded outside my house, the lights came into the living room, but I couldn't do anything, I was completely frozen, I couldn't move.

*footsteps*

Officer - "Hey!!! There's a kid here!!!"

Ethan -"..."

That part of the story is blurry...
A week passed after that, and I was about to go to my family's funeral, my father was there, along with my grandparents, uncles, cousins, they were all there to see them off.
I couldn't cry anymore... I had spent my tears in the week of mourning... I could only feel one thing... anger.
That combined with impotence destroys you emotionally.
But having my brother's favorite toy in my hand hurt even more, I could still feel his hand, it was as if he was holding hands.
The sadness left me and only anger is what my heart felt... I felt guilty, I wasn't there, even if I couldn't have done anything, at least I would be with them... accompanying them.
The father kept talking, and saying goodbye to them, my ears were deaf, the only thing I could hear was my mother's scream before I got home...anger is the only thing I feel.
My hand was squeezing my brother's toy car so hard that I almost broke it...

*crack*

Everyone - "..."

His toy broke, I did not measure the force, everyone looked at me ... I just turned around ... and headed home.
My eyes were finally starting to water again, but I wasn't about to cry again.
I dried the tears with my forearm, my eyes began to burn and when I finished taking them out, they began to take on an intense reddish color... the tears that began to flow again evaporated, I didn't notice that and kept walking home.
... all I felt was anger...
I got to my dad's house, I wanted to hit something... I wanted to rest... I wished that everything had been a dream, but that never happened, I kept waking up at dad's house.
A few hours have passed and the funeral was over.

*knock knock*

Dad - "...Are...are you alright?"

Ethan -"..."

Dad - "That sounded like all the days before."

Ethan -"..."

Dad - "...look, this is not a good time to say it but... I want you to let go of the facts and move on okay?...I run away."

Ethan - "WHAT?!!!"

I opened the door in a fit of anger.

Ethan - "How did I run away?!!!

Dad - "That... he fled to another country."

Ethan - "well... chase him!!!

Dad - "They can't!!!"

Ethan - "Why not?!!!"

Dad - "Because they say it's not within their jurisdiction!!!"

Ethan -"..."

Dad - "..."

Ethan - "Your jurisdiction?"

Dad - "..."

Ethan - "HIS JURISDICTION?!!!, THAT IDIOT IS A MURDERER!!!, AND THEY ARE NOT GOING TO LOOK FOR HIM BECAUSE HE
FLEDED TO ANOTHER COUNTRY?!!! GO TO FUCK WITH YOUR FUCKING JURISDICTION!!!"

Dad - "Calm down!!!"

Ethan - "HOW DO YOU WANT ME TO CALM DOWN?!!! I SAW HIM!!! I SAW HIM FLEEING IN A CAR!!! HOW THE HELL AM I GOING TO CALM DOWN?!!!"

Dad - "..."

Ethan - "I don't know what I'm going to do, but I'm going to do something about it!!!

Dad - "Ethan!!!...DAMN!!! *Crying*"

I left there leaving my dad alone, I was on my way home, frustrated, sad, angry...
When a person is in these conditions, nothing good can go through his head...
I got home and grabbed the most compact backpack possible, I picked up my clothes and prepared to commit the stupidest thing ever thought of by a child... I would look for it... and do justice.
Leaving the house I saw my father's card, they had been in and out constantly, he had forgotten it here, I grabbed it and left the house willing to do anything possible so that that idiot knows justice.
My father was not exactly rich, he is just a man with a lot of economic accessibility, so I did not lack anything, I had a cell phone, warm clothes, I had everything, so that even an 11-year-old brat would go out into the world in search of a uncertain future.
On October 14... I left my home to look for him, my mother told us where he came from, 6 states south of my city, my cell phone had GPS, it's just a matter of moving forward without rest.
Let's see a little more of the past... before it all started.
My mom and dad met more than 14 years ago, they were young and neglected, my mother got pregnant with me and the economic stability was very uncontrollable, my grandmother's support for my mother was always there, thanks to that we did not suffer, my father was determined to get out in this world, dreams that led him to neglect his family, that made my mother and father distance themselves, their relationship was very bipolar, time later they had a second child, but they continued to feel bad, until who separated on June 27.
My mother taught me many things, I believed that the lack of a father figure would hurt me, honestly I didn't care, I had karate classes for a long time, I got out of martial art with a Black belt, but I got bored, I got out of karate and trained swimming , it was always fun to go to the pools, swimming was fun.
Thanks to food and training I grew strong and healthy, my characteristics are simple.

-Slim and athletic build (said by a doctor)
-Height 1.68 (very tall for my age)
-Weight 60 kg (something decent for my age and height)

I didn't complain, it was fun, despite the physical over-demands it was never a problem, it was fun and I liked it, I have a high resistance to fatigue and I consider myself strong... while considering all this I was already about to reach the border of my city thanks to the GPS of my cell phone, I spent 3 hours walking to get there... why not take buses?... it was my punishment... no trucks, nothing easy, just walking with a fixed course. .. punishment for?... for being weak, for abandoning them, for not being able to do anything about it... for their lives...
And that's how this trip began, with my vision cloudy and disoriented... I had taken a step out of my city heading for the road that leads to the next city... and so for a long, long time.

Ethan - "..."

*Vibration*

*click*

Ethan - "...hello?"

Dad - "Where are you?"

Ethan - "...I am...seeking justice."

I hung up... and kept walking.