Out of the closet

by sissygriff

Rating: teen
Tags: Ocellus, Suicide / Self Harm, Profanity, Slice of Life, Anthro, Young Six, Silverstream, Drama, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Romance
Length: 3458

after Ocellus finally gets the surgery to fianlly become a girl, she wanted to be happy but it felt like the world and her family were against her, but she has a love;y girlfriend to help her

After so long of waiting Ocellus finally gets surgery so she could finally feel and be a girl. Her girlfriend was there to help her, her friends were honestly confused but happy for her, and even others at school were kind to her after...but not the same could be said about her family. She just wanted to belong and be loved with real love but not she doesn't know what to think.

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this is a sequel to the story "In the closet"

Warning to some triggers and if you don't like these please read another story. Some are a character that wears diapers for medical reasons, some parts of bondage no sex parts, some talk about rape, mental abuse, self-harm, talk about suicide, and depression

Published 2022-12-08 15:50:00 UTC
Last updated 2022-12-08 15:50:00 UTC

late night

Author's Note

the chapter begins by explaining a dream Ocellus has to basically show some parts of her mental health

late night

Ocellus usually doesn't dream but when she does it's always about some library where she'll be tracked down by some monster, usually gets those from stress about tests and projects. but now she was under stress because the next morning she would have to go under the knife and finally get surgery for her sex change and she was anxious and terrified of the outcome.

But now as she slept she found herself in her old room and everything looked the same but was off. Everything seemed blurry, her pictures posters, and little figures she collected looked very distorted, especially their faces. Ocellus gulped at the strange site but went over to her door, thankfully it opened and it leads out to her old home hallway. She heard the buzzing of tv static and an eerie glow coming down the hall.

She carefully walked down the hall to the living room finding her parents and little brothers all sitting on the couch each face distorted and all sitting entirely still. She waved her hand in front of them but nothing.

"Umm...mom...dad...Nickel...Mercury?" Ocellus whispered

Ocellus tried touching them but when she did her mind filled up with feelings of hate and anger, the static intensified, and everything started to glow a blood red. She quickly pulled back her hand and everything went back to normal.

"Wh...wh....what was that!?!" Ocellus cried out knowing no one would hear her

But she froze in her tracks hearing the static stop. She turned around seeing the tv was showing some kind of VCR screen. She stepped forward hitting her foot. She glace down seeing a video tape with the writing "School". She was confused, the only time she used VCR tapes is when she visited her aunt at a museum of television. She picked up the tape and looked back at the tv now seeing it changed into an old box tv with a VCR sitting on top of it. She walked over to it and placed the tape in seeing the screen turning back into static, she was disappointed at this but then heard a door open near her.

Ocellus turned to see a door opening from the wall into what seemed like a hallway from her old elementary school. She hated that place since she was a child, she wasn't that smart as a kid and her teacher would make fun of her and use her work as an "Escape Goat" for bed homework and school work to turn in, and of course, all the times she was bullied, beaten and mocked for being trans and one of the beating cause her balder to break and the result was her medical condition making her wear diapers.

She felt a shiver go down her spine seeing the hallway but forced herself to leave the emptiness of her old distorted home to the even more coldness and memories of pain and fear of the school. the second she stepped in she saw that the door was gone and replaced with a wall. She looked around seeing the darkness but then her ears picked up the sound of a kid crying, her crying. She looked down the hall seeing a door open and the same statically glow.

She went over to it and took a deep breath before stepping inside seeing the old classroom filled with still kids all in chaotic poses, some fighting, some cheating in many ways on some kind of unreadable scribe, and some seemed to be laughing and each face distorted and twisted and blurred like Ocellus wasn't meant to see them. She looked at the front desk seeing her old bitch of a teacher "Ms. Crab-tree". Ocellus looked at her desk finally seeing readable papers from a torn-up dairy and as she read them she realized they were hers.

She remembered how one day the school counselor asked her to bring her dairy so they could talk about her problems but even before the bell rang for the day Ms. Crab-tree found Ocellus dairy when it fell as she got some homework papers. She remembered how the teacher took it and read it out loud to the class making Ocellus get bullied even worst. When she tried to fight back and take her dairy back she grabbed by the back of her shirt and locked in the room's closet for the whole day, her crying masked but the chaotic classroom.

She stared into the twisted spiral that was the teacher's face and felt every piece of anger and fear grow in her body but she felt like she couldn't do anything. But she then noticed a key around her neck and she saw a tag saying "Closest key", the same one that would seal Ocellus in that dark small room for many hours at a time.

She reached for the key, feeling her hand phase through her teacher's body, and again the room turned into an intense red static glow and her body filled up with hate and fear. She drew her hand back quickly and thankfully everything died down and she gave a sigh of relief. But she went over slowly to the closest door hearing the crying of her younger self getting louder. She slid the key into the lock and heard the click and then opened it and froze in shock.

Instead of a young her crying, it was her childhood doll "Windy" the pink rose wendigo. Ocellus saw how he cried foamy tears but stopped when Ocellus stepped inside and it seemed to glow. Ocellus picked up the plush and it looked brand-new way better than the years after Ocellus made him. But the mouth opened something it wasn't supposed to do and drop a doorknob that sprouted out spider legs.

Ocellus squirmed at the sight as the small door-knob spider crawled up the wall and stink itself into it and turn and opened yet another door this time leading to the school of friendship. She gulped but stepped inside hearing the door shut behind her. She looked around the hazy purple blur of the hallway and saw another glowing room this time showing one of a red warm.

She made her way down finding an open doorway to the library. She stepped inside saw one of the round tables and saw her friends all sitting there all looking like they were having a great time, unlike the ones before their faces weren't that distorted but their bodies were still and still a bit blurry.

But the one thing confusing the changeling was the only one missing besides her was Silverstream. She went over to the table seeing a single book with the title "Real Love". She reached over to it and accidentally touched their hands which seemed to be touching the book, the room turned into one of a cold calming pink and she was filled with joy, love, and pride. but she took the book and another light turned on and she saw one of the bookshelves missing a book and she guess it was the one she was holding.

She walked over to it and was about to put the book back but her curiosity got the better of her. Ocellus opened it up and began to read one of the random passages.

"As the princess found the pink feathered proper in the closest, she helped her out, and in return, the proper helped the princess with her problems and with a voice like an angel with the joy of the whole world only said, "I will hold you and lift your spirits and not let go until I know your better"." Ocellus read, she closed the book and thought for a second, "Is this book talking about me and Silverstream?"

Ocellus put the book finally into the shelf and saw it opened up to a hidden dark passage. She took a deep breath and stepped into the darkness and after a couple of feet she fell into the dark pit trying to scream out but nothing came. But she finally landed finding herself in a giant royal ballroom bathed in a golden glow that wasn't blurry and hazy like the ones before.

Now her head was starting to hurt a bit, she removed her glasses and rubbed her forehead but saw her sleeve was different. She put her glasses back on and saw that now she was wearing a tux.

"What?...how...when did I?" Ocellus mumbled

Ocellus looked at her tux and it looked nice on her but she was more confused. She was mainly confused about this strange dearm or nightmare she really couldn't decide. She looked around the grand ballroom, reminding her of a fairytale well her favorite part was where the princess and prince would dance in a royal ball.

She was mainly confused why her head would come with all of this and she wanted to know what it meant, but she felt like someone was behind her, and before she could even turn she heard,

"Hey, Celly."

Ocellus turned around and froze in her tracks seeing her girlfriend Silverstream, wearing a pink royal gown, her face was actually fully normal, with no strange blur on her body, but had this strange warmth on her that felt right. Ocellus found herself smiling at the sight of Silverstream and finally felt at peace.

Silverstream offered her hand and Ocellus gladly accepted. But the second they grabbed each other's hands the room grew brighter and Ocellus felt a jolt of something.

"Celly...Celly....hey Celly...Cccceellyyy wake up please..."

Ocellus slowly opened her eyes to the feeling of someone poking her and the bright glow of her room light. She reached for her glasses but someone handed them to her, in her half-sleepy state she sat up with her blanket half-hung on her, and was putting her glasses on almost poking her eyes out.

With her glasses on, she could finally see and wasn't surprised to see Silverstream there, still in her black sweatpants she uses instead of PJ bottoms and her old shirt of an inky horror-cartoon cat, kneeling in front of her looking like an excited little kid. Ocellus looked over at her clock seeing the time was "1:12 AM".

"Silv...it's one...one in the morning..." Ocellus mumbled through her sleepy state

The last thing she knew before sleeping was checking her phone seeing it was 12:12, after knowing that she let out a small sigh.

"And...and I only got...an hour...sleeppp...(Sore)..." Ocellus managed to get back to sleep sitting up

"Oh, no, no, no wake up you!" Silverstream exclaimed

Silverstream shook Ocellus back awake and helped her out of bed to the resistance of Ocellus.

"Silv....let me go....go back to bed...." Ocellus sleepily slurred

"Oh, no, no, no! Celly what's today?" Silverstream asked

Ocellus was confused and rubbed her head.

"The...day...day of my sure...surgery...." Ocellus mumbled

"Yup, and?" Silverstream asked

Ocellus's mind was still fuzzy but had to remember something. Then it hit her like a train snapping her out of her sleepiness.

"Oh, yeah...our an...anniversary..." Ocellus mumbled with a hit of happiness, "But...couldn't this wait...until later?"

"Later you would have been still in the hospital, and I been working on this for three hours!" Silverstream exclaimed, "So come on, put a robe on and follow me!"

Ocellus was still tired so Silverstream had to help her put her robe on and after that Silverstream took her hand and lead her out. Ocellus's mind was still fuzzy and was confused about where they were going.

"Where...where are we going?" Ocellus mumbled still sleepily

"Ohh....you'll see!" Silverstream cheered

Ocellus tried to focus on staying awake but found herself getting still sleepily from the darkness of the school and a little creeped out from it. But with Silverstream there, she felt at peace. Silverstream lead her down some hall being veg and quiet about where they were going and ignoring Ocellus with her humming.

But when they got to the hall where the lunch room was, Ocellus's eyes were covered by Silverstream confusing her.

"Umm...what are doing?" Ocellus whispered

"It's a surprise!" Silverstream exclaimed, "So kept those eyes close!"

"Silv...I'm so tired I can barely keep them open..." Ocellus tried to joke

Ocellus could hear Silverstream open the door and they lead the changeling inside. Once inside Ocellus's nose was filled with the smell of some food that seemed to put her in a state of calm and relaxation. The sent got stronger and then Ocellus felt Silverstream step behind her with her hands still over Ocellus's eyes.

"You ready?" Silverstream asked

"I have been ready..." Ocellus responded

"Oh yeah, well....surprise!" Silverstream exclaimed

Silverstream took her hands away from Ocellus's eyes and she gasped at the sight. At one of the round tables next to a window that showed the town at night, she was that Silverstream set it up like a fancy restaurant table with a couple of candles, a small bucket of ice with some sparking lemonade they both liked, and a couple of plates with some sushi, a small thing of strawberry and chocolate cake, fried shrimp and some pan-fried fishes.

Ocellus was surprised at the sight and was kind of hungry and could use something like this to get her mind off of her dream and stressful week.

"Silv!...did...did you make this?" Ocellus asked

"Yup!" Silverstream proclaimed

"Guessing you made a bad mess?" Ocellus asked

"Y...yeah...." Silverstream mumbled starting to blush, "But it's all cleaned now..."

Ocellus giggled at Silverstream's blushy face. The two sat down at the table and Ocellus was still in awe at the food. Ocellus took some and placed it on her plate and took a bite and squeezed in joy and shock.

"You like?" Silverstream asked

"This is so amazing!" Ocellus exclaimed, "When did you learn to cook like this?"

"Oh, a while back." Silverstream began to explain, "Mostly from my new step-mom."

"Step-mom...when did you get a step-mom?" Ocellus asked

"My, mom meet this hippogriff cook name "Windflare" a while back." Silverstream stated, "She's pretty nice and thought me and my brother a whole lot of new cooking tips...and she's probatory the second person my mom meet they actually loved her, heck last time I talked to them they said they were getting married."

"Wow...sounds nice." Ocellus responded, "Hey, Silv?"

Silverstream lifted her head still chomping down on some of the sushi but quickly shallowed.

"Yeah?" Silverstream asked

"Why, did you cook so late at night?" Ocellus asked

"Oh, so no one else could interrupt us...and no one yelling at me for making a mess..." Silverstream mumbled

"Oh...but this is better...epically after the dream I had..." Ocellus whispered under her breath

"Dream? What kind of dream?" Silverstream asked

"Well...you know that horror game you play..." Ocellus began to ask

"Town evil?" Silverstream cut in

"No, the other one." Ocellus said

"Little night terrors?" Silverstream asked again

"No....the one about the town in the really creepy fog...has that cube-head thing..." Ocellus mumbled

"Ohhh, silent mountain!" Silverstream exclaimed, "You were dreaming about finding the killer of your dead brother?"

"No, it was more like...everything was blurry... everyone's faces were distorted..." Ocellus explained, "But...the way it ended...I was in a royal ballroom wearing a tux...and...and I turn around...and...and...uhhhh..."

Ocellus remembers the way it ended seeing Silverstream in the royal dress. Silverstream saw how Ocellus seemed to freeze up like a computer.

"You ok?" Silverstream asked

"OH!!!...uhhh yeah...just...just can't remember the ending..." Ocellus responded

Ocellus just shoved another thing of shrimp into her mouth ad Silverstream looked confused but thought of something.

"Huh...sounds like you're under a bunch of stress..." Silverstream stated, "But, hopefully after today you'll feel a lot better!"

Ocellus looked confused and mumbled, "What are you talking about?", through her full mouth.

"Hehehe, already forgot about your surgery today?" Silverstream asked

Ocellus gulped shallowing the food and chuckled in embarrassment.

"Ohh...oh yeah..." Ocellus mumbled, "Guess...I forgot...kinda...but yeah...I have been under a bunch of stress..."

"Well...have you been using your...your straitjacket relaxation?" Silverstream asked embarrassed as the mental image came to mind

"Really couldn't...I accidentally ripped one of the sleeves off and didn't have the materials to repair it..." Ocellus explained

Ocellus then noticed a sly smile on Silverstream's face. She then reached for something under the table.

"Well...good thing I got this!" Silverstream sing in delight

Silverstream brought up a light-blue box with a pink ribbon tieing it shut. Silverstream handed the box over to the changeling, Ocellus just looked at the box very curious about what was inside it.

"Well...open it up!" Silverstream exclaimed

Ocellus untied the ribbon carefully and then opened the lid of it and blushed brightly at what was inside. The gift in question was a light-red straitjacket with a puffy soft inside and a collar with gems on it.

"Wh...wh...when did you get this?!?" Ocellus questioned in shock and embarrassment

"The day after...You told me about your problems..." Silverstream began to explain, "So, I went to this town's local bondage shop...really surprised they had one, more surprised it was run by a hippogriff. And I was really overwhelmed by all the stuff, so she helped me out...and helped me get his one for you."

Ocellus looked at the piece of equipment again and back at Silverstream.

"She told me that this one is specially made for relaxation and even just for changelings." Silverstream stated, "The gems are for if you change into anything the jacket would still be wrapped up on you so you can't escape, and the puffiness for comfort."

"Really?...how much did this cost?" Ocellus asked

"Oh...not that much...it was basically free..." Silverstream explained

But Ocellus saw that Silverstream looked anxious and was tapping her claw and puffing her cheeks, her ears dropped down like a dog, her eyes darted side to side, her very interesting tell for when she was about to say something embarrassing.

"But...I would have to...to be her model for her shop's magazines...for a while...but would get paid a lot..." Silverstream embarrassing explained

Ocellus was now blushing, she placed her fork down and began tapping her clawed hand on the table.

"Uhh...oh...wow very...in...interesting...." Ocellus trailed off, her mind now filled with the thought of her girlfriend on the front page of one of the magazines, "Soo...when...when..."

"Check under the straitjacket." Silverstream cut in

Ocellus was confused but lifted the jacket out and almost yelped in surprise seeing one of the magazines and on the cover page was Silverstream locked in a straitjacket, ball-gag, and hung upside down. Ocellus quickly put the jacket back and took the box with the contents inside and quickly and tightly hugged it as her whole face blushed.

"Hahahaha, I guess you love it?" Silverstream teased

"Uhh...uhh....yeah..." Ocellus mumbled, last for words

Ocellus placed the box next to her and looked back at Silverstream and smiled shyly.

"Thanks a bunch, Silv...I...I'm really enjoying this..." Ocellus shyly whispered

"Your welcome Celly!" Silverstream exclaimed

About an hour later they were done eating and went back to their rooms. Ocellus sat back in bed and felt much better. She lay down and wanted to get back to sleep but was scared that she would get another strange dream. But she looked over at the straitjacket that was laying over her desk and considered wearing it. She never really wore her DIY one for bed but wanted to try it out.

"Well...Silv did get it just for you to relax..." Ocellus whispered

Ocellus got back up and went over to the desk. She picked it up nervous putting it on. Usually, with her DIY one she would transform to escape it, but with this one, it would be a nice exspearice. She slowly put her arms through the sleeves and then adjusted the other straps, and then finally she wrapped her arms around her and pulled on the arm straps feeling the light tightness of the arms setting.

Ocellus tugged on it a bit feeling how nice and tight it was. She then had the idea of transforming so she quickly did a few rounds of shape-shifting into some different creatures like a feral dragon, bear, fish, ladybug, griffon, hippogriff, mouse, and even a rock for fun. But each time the jacket was still bound on her and was still nice and tight on her.

She then went over to her bed and laid on it feeling the fluffiness of the padded inside keeping her nice and warm and nice and sung. She let out a relaxed sigh and soon found herself going to sleep this time not feeling any stress, fears, or her problems haunting her.