Fallout Equestria: Finding Hope

Chapter 6: Reunion

“I’m just glad you’re safe… It’s good to see you again…”

Falling asleep a little bit earlier than normal seemed to help with my stress a little bit. I was able to wake up at the same time as Stardust and have breakfast and take stock of everything in my inventory. Neon was still asleep and we still had about an hour or two until we had to start heading out to the Bluewater mine. I had suggested that we sit around for an hour but Stardust had a different idea.

…

“C’mon Midnight! If we can get this to work this time you’ll be able to learn about yourself!” Stardust wanted to try out her memory spell again but I wasn’t sure if I wanted to do it. All the stuff that’s been happening lately had me questioning if I really wanted to learn about my past. A part of me wasn’t sure if I could tell Stardust no though.
“I guess we can try it. I don’t know if I’ll like what I see but I guess it’s what I need to do.” I finish the rest of a Sparkle Cola bottle I was drinking and walk over to the bed and sit how I did when we first tried to do this. Stardust does the same. “I bet Neon is going to be confused if he wakes up in the middle of this.”
Stardust touches her horn to my head, “I’m sure it’s not going to be the weirdest thing he’ll ever see.” Stardust’s horn begins to glow its lavender shade, “Ready?” I nod my head.
All around me a bright white veil of white covers the entire room along with Stardust. I’m in what appears to be an endless room of white. I stand up to my hooves and walk around. My body feels as if there’s no weight to it as I take each step. I look down at my hooves and notice my PipBuck isn’t there anymore. My hoof looks so naked without it.
“Where are you Midnight? I can’t seem to pinpoint you in here!,” I jump a little when Stardust’s voice fills the white void around me.
I’m not sure how to answer her question, “Uhh, here… I guess?” I wave a hoof into the air, hoping it can somehow get her attention.”
In her usual flash of purple Stardust appears in front of me, “There we go! This place is kinda confusing actually!”
“Okay but uhh… Where are we exactly?” I wave a hoof at the endless nothingness surrounding us, “There’s nothing here!”
“Well first of all, there's a lot of stuff here. It’s just that neither of us can see it until we want to,” Stardust’s horn begins to glow and large oblong shapes start appearing all around us on the floor. I trot up to one cautiously and look to see what it is. The one I walk up to is about the size of one of our beds at the hotel. Its surface ripples like water and I can see the faint picture of ponies moving around on the other side. I go to touch it with a hoof when Stardust smacks it away. “You can’t just go touching random things Midnight! Especially if you don’t know what they are!”
I rub my hoof where she hit me, “Fine, can you at least explain to me what these are?” I look back down to watch the faint pictures move around.
“That’s how we’re going to get into your memories. Notice how they aren’t crystal clear. You can only make out shapes but nothing more. That’s how you know you truly didn’t forget everything. It’s just been covered up.” I look over at Stardust in surprise, “What? I’ve spent the last couple nights and days reading about it!”
“Alright, alright, calm down. You are the smart one in our group. So how do we view them then?” I look back down at the memory puddle, resisting the urge to touch it.
“I believe we just, jump in… “ She puts a hoof to her chin, “But I could be wro-”
“THREE TWO ONE GO!” I yell and jump headfirst into the puddle.

oooOMOooo

I find myself standing in the middle of a room made of clouds. Similar to almost every house in simulated Cloudsdale. There are various pictures scattered around me, of me with a blue bob of some kind. I sit there for a moment before giving up and take a look at the rest of the room. In the center of the room is a hanging banner that says “Welcome Home Daddy” scribbled on with colorful paints. A small heart painted with a light green is at the very end. And standing underneath the banner is something I’ve only seen in pictures. A small little foal with a charcoal coat and a pure white mane with just a smidge of blue on the side. Myself.
“Oh my gosh Midnight! Look at you! You’re so cute!” Stardust’s voice startles me once again. I look over and she has both of her hooves squished against her cheeks.
I shake my head, “Can you not scare me everytime you speak?”
“I’m sorry! But I mean c’mon! Look how cute you are!” Okay I guess she has a point. I do look pretty cute. Filly me is covered in splotches of colorful paint all over her fur. Clearly I had worked extremely hard at making this.
I walk up and reach out a hoof to smaller me. It feels like it should be impossible to be this close to myself. When I put my hoof on top of my head it fazes right through. Small me ignores me entirely, she is too focused on a painting of me and that blue stallion. I look back at Stardust, “I mean I’m cute and all but isn’t stuff supposed to be happening?” I look back over at Filly Me,other than blinking she’s staring intently at the door in front of her.
“I guess we’ll wait with you I guess?” Stardust says behind me.
We waited for what I could only guess was about ten minutes before something happened. Even little me quickly ran to the bathroom at one point.
After all that waiting something big happened. The door that I guess is the one Filly Midnight was waiting to open finally opens and the familiar colors of somepony I thought was family walked through. Novasurge, my dad. Nopony else walks in with him.
Next to me Stardust whispers, “Who’s that?”
“Well, In the simulation that was my dad, but who knows anymore honestly…” I look over at myself. Her smile and happy attitude melts away into a frown and squinty eyes.
Filly me runs over to Novasurge, “You’re not Daddy! Where is my Daddy!” She begins hitting his chest with her hoof, “Tell me where Daddy is!”

Novasurge’s attitude doesn’t change, “Quit yelling child, I have something to tell you.” He pushes me away and kneels down, “You’re daddy won’t be making it home any time soon. I’m here to bring you to your new home.”

My eyes shoot open. So much seemed to come back to me at once. My dad had left to do… well something. I don’t know. But Novasurge had made me move away from my home without any explanation why and at a moment's notice. He never even let me grab my things. Who he really was is still extremely fuzzy to me and why he moved me is also a mystery.

Tears begin to fall from myself. Both me and past me. I don’t know who my father is but a heavy feeling of sadness pours over me for him… Young me begins to quickly back up screaming that she won’t go. Novasurge instantly snatches her in his hooves and drags her away into the hallway. All around us the room begins to melt away, back into the white void we were in before.

oooOMOooo

I sat in that white void for a couple minutes before saying anything. All that emotion that waved through me was so unexpected, and powerful. I sat in Stardust’s lap crying to myself for what seemed like an eternity. And I felt even worse for making Stardust see me like that. But she was there for me the whole time, letting me drain out every ounce of sadness that I had gotten from that memory.
I stand back up to my hooves and wipe my face, “Please don’t tell Neon about any of this,” I let out a half hearted giggle, “And thank you… I’m sorry we’ve been here for so long…”
Stardust’s voice is quiet, “Midnight… You just relieved one of the worst events of your life. Take all the time you need.” She hugged me one more time, “I’m sorry Midnight…”
I embrace the hug happily. We may be in my head but it feels too good to be together like this. I don’t know where I would be without her… What would have happened to me in the six days I’ve been in the wasteland if I hadn’t met her.
“Stardust I have to tell you something… I think I-”
In one erratic movement both me and Stardust are flung back into reality. Neon stands on the bed next to me. He begins to yell, “What the hell are you two doing! We have a problem!”
“Wait! What the hell is happening?” I yell back. I feel my cheeks to make sure that I wasn’t crying in the real world.
Over by the entrance to our room I hear Stalk’s voice, “I don’t have any words to describe it, I need you to come look at this!”

I hop up onto my hooves, Stardust is still trying to collect herself. Clearly the spell had taken a lot out of her. I help her stand up to her hooves. “Are you going to be okay?” She looks at me and nods. “Okay let's go!”

I hop off of the bed and follow Stalk and Neon down the hallway. Neon slows down so he’s next to me, “What were you two doing? It took us forever to snap you two out of it.”

I sigh, “We were trying to get back some of my memories…”

“Well, did you learn anything?” I look over at Neon, his voice sounds sincere compared to his usual monotone attitude. This is the first time he’s genuinely seemed to care about something.

“Uhhh, yea. But I’ll explain it later. I don’t really want to talk or think about it anymore.” He gives me an understanding nod.

We walk all the way outside and down the street, at least half the town is surrounding something like vultures. Stalk pushes through them, yelling at them to get out of the way. In the center of the crowd is something I never would have guessed Stalk would be bringing me to.

A small yellow and blue corpse of a pegasus colt. His skull is caved in on one side and the ground is covered in fresh blood. I notice that one of his wings is small enough that it probably wouldn’t allow him to fly.

I looked over at Stalk, “He fell, didn’t he?”

Stalk gives me a grim nod, “Happened a couple of minutes ago… You’re the only other pegasus I know of so I figured you would know who he was…”

Behind me I hear Stardust gasp. I look back down at the corpse, “I have no idea, but we should give him a proper burial. Nopony deserves death like that, especially so young.”

As I go to pick up the small colt, bolts of green hit the ground all around me. Each of them melts into the ground. The crowd of ponies around me begins to disperse in screams of fright. I quickly throw myself over the colt’s body to block the green bolts until they stop. I back up and look at the source of the shots.

Almost instantly my eyes go wide, a pegasus covered in a bright red set of armor that covers every inch of their body in metal. Even their tail is armored to look like the end of a scorpion’s tail. Two special kinds of weapons are mounted onto the side, each of them have a faint green glow on them.

The pegasus begins to say something, “No, no no no!” From their voice I can tell it’s a mare, “You need to get out of here! Now!” Her voice begins to sound more and more panicked under her helmet.

“Wait? Why? Who are you?!” I yell back.

“You don’t-? Oh no.” The mare looks up and two more of the armored pegasi fly down. Except these two are wearing a purple set of the same armor. I can’t help but notice that these two are red on my E.F.S, but the mare is blue. The mare begins to talk, “It’s okay you two. I have it all covered from here.”

The two land in front of me, their energy guns begin to glow bright green, “Back away fro-”

One of them interrupts the other, “It’s that Dashite! We are so getting promoted today!”

“Wait a second… “The other pauses for a second, “I think it’s that Midnight Note Dashite that the commander always tells us to look out for!”

The red suited mare drops down in front of them both, “I said have it covered soldiers! You are to return back to Cirrus and your posts! NOW!”

The one on the left snickers, “Not without her we aren’t! It’s payday fillies!”

I look at all my friends. All of them seem to be as confused as I am. I guess I better speak up and figure out what the hell is going on, “Listen! I’m not going with you! I don’t have time to deal with whatever kind of bullshit you think you’re going to try and pull, I am not in the mood for it!”

All except the red mare laugh. One of them decides to speak up, “Listen, I’ve heard about what you can do but do you really think you can take all three of us! If you don’t cooperate we’ll kill everypony here in this run down shithole of a town!”

I glance down and realize that I forgot to bring my guns, not even a knife.I could probably take them but I don’t know if I would want to risk everyone's lives over something so stupid.

“Fucking Luna damn it fine! I’ll go!” I throw up my hooves. “You better leave each one of these ponies alone or I swear.”

One of them laughs, “Oh wow, you sure are threatening aren’t ya? Cuff her.”

I look over at Stardust and Neon, both appear to be in shock, “I’ll be back. I’m not sure how long it will take me... but I’ll be back.” The expressions on their faces lighten up a little bit but stay wary.

“You better come back soon Midnight…” Neon says calmly, “We do have a package to deliver.”

The red pegasi sighs and walks in front of me. She grabs what looks like a set of hoofcuffs out of a compartment in her armor and puts them around my front hooves. They don’t seem to affect me that much, but whatever. “What are you doing Midnight?!” She whispers.

I give her a weird look before she turns back around to her soldiers, “Grab the colt and follow back up to Cirrus. Lets go”

I give one final wave to my friends. I really hope I make it back…

Our flight straight up to the cloud cover was awkward. The red armored mare and I were quiet the entire time and the other two were talking about how they were going to live the lifestyle of the rich and the famous after this. I quickly learned I never need to listen to them.

Going through the cloud cover to see the real sun was one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen. A sea of pure white stretching as far as the eye can see. I couldn’t help but notice a small bit of that giant white tower poking its head through the clouds miles away from us.

In the other direction was something I wasn’t expecting. This “Cirrus” they were talking about wasn’t this small little settlement but a full blown city! From where we were I could see various pegasi flying across the skyline. Tons of buildings ranging from simple cloud houses to actual stone structures everywhere. I never expected anything like this to be above the wasteland…

We flew around the very edge of the city until we got to a very large blue stone building. We land at the back of it and I nearly fall face first because of the hoofcuffs. The two snarky asshole soldiers led first into the building. We walked down a couple hallways, occasionally walking past a pegasi who would ignore us like we weren't even there. One did look very surprised to see me though. But I have no idea who they were.

We finally get to the jail cell. The red mare was kind enough to unlock my hoofcuffs before one of the others very aggressively pushed me into the cell. I look around and see no other ponies in the jail. Cirrus must be a peaceful city.

“Alright, I’m gonna wait here with the Dashite while you two go inform the commander of her capture.” Both of them nod eagerly and trot out of the room. The mare lets out a sigh and unlocks my cell and walks in, not bothering to close the door behind her.

She slowly gets closer and closer. “Uhh, what are you doing?” I ask.

The mare stops a few inches from my face, “I’ve missed you so much.” She quickly takes off her helmet and I instantly notice her blue green mane and her purple coat. Before I can say anything I’m embraced in a kiss by somepony who I thought didn’t exist.

She backs up and I don’t know what to say, “Aera… It’s you… “

Aera raises her eyebrow, “Yea? And? Did you not realize it was me?” My mind was already going insane thinking all these crazy thoughts about everything and now the world is throwing Aera into the mix! What the fuck is happening!

I fall back to my flank and put a hoof to my chest. My heart is beginning to beat way harder than it should be. “Y- you just kissed me. You’re... real.”

“That’s because I love you, duh? ...Midnight, are you okay?” She takes a step closer to me.

“No… I’m not. I don’t know you Aera… I mean I know you but not the real you…” Oh Luna, help me now! “I lost my memory, Aera. I was trapped in some simulation and it corrupted my mind…“

Aera falls down to her haunches in surprise, “You don’t remember anything? Nothing of who you are? What have you been doing down there Midnight! You attack the commander one day and they brand you with the Dashite symbol but you somehow escape without even saying goodbye! Then here you are a year later with a group of ponies with no memory of your life!” Aera takes a deep breath and pauses for a moment. “I loved you Midnight… And I still do… And you used to love me… Do you still love me…?”

That question really destroyed me. Something in that moment broke me again for the second time that day. Tears began streaming down my face and as much as my body wanted to tell her that I did, my mind knew who I really loved….

“I’m so sorry Aera… I can’t say that I love you. At one point in my life I may have but I don’t know the real you… I’m so sorry…” I want to go home. I want to run as far and as fast as I can away from here… I want to be with Stardust…

It takes Aera a moment to comprehend everything before she just answers back with a small nod. I notice tears going down her face but before I can say anything else she quickly puts her helmet back on and storms out of the cell, locking it behind her. I try to call out to her but my throat closes up.

She’s gone. A big piece of my past and I shatter her heart and mine to pieces in a matter of seconds. I lie down on the ground and cry until my brain decides that I need to sleep…

…

I woke up to somepony kicking my back with an armored hoof. My tears and snot are matted to my face. I tried to wipe it with a hoof to no avail.

“Wake up Dashite! Commander wants to talk to you!” I sit up and turn around, “Let’s go prisoner!”

“Calm down dude… I’m going.” I check my pipbuck to see that I’ve only slept for about a half hour. I stand up and the stallion cuffs me again. I don’t see why it’s necessary but whatever. “Let’s go…”

I follow the stallion down to a different room right across the hallway. Nothing but a mirror and a table are in the room. “Wait here Dashite.” The door closes behind me. I walk to the other side of the table and face the door. The obvious two way mirror is behind me. I wait a couple minutes until yet another pony of my past comes in. Novasurge. He’s wearing a suit and a captain's hat with the letter E embroidered into them.

He walks in alone and from what I can tell unarmed. A little pony in my head is screaming at him for what he did to me when I was a foal. “So what the hell do you want Nova? I am really not in the mood right now.”

Nova calmly sits down in front of me and crosses his front hooves on the table. “You haven’t seen any of us in a year and that’s the first thing you say to me. Last time we saw each other you had just got done bashing my head in with my own helmet and broke the leg and wing of two other soldiers.”

I shake my head, “You know, I wouldn’t doubt that’s something I would do but I don’t remember any of that. Hell, I barely even know who you are! So lets just get whatever the hell this is over with. I want to go home.”

“I don’t want anything from you, I just wanted to see what you’ve been doing since you left. Clearly you’ve been busy these last couple days because of the reports we’ve heard from the DjPon3 fellow. All I want is information.” Information? Really? I don’t think the amnesiac mare is gonna have all the information you would want.

“What kind of information?” I ask.

“I just want to know more about those ponies living down on the surface. What they’ve been up to and if they could be a possible ally.” Well I mean that’s an easy question.

“Well if you’ve spent any time on the surface you would already know that it depends on who you talk to. Most settlements are filled with ponies just trying to survive and make a living. But there are other groups that thrive on kil-”

Nova interrupts me, “That’s not what I mean. None of us give a rat's ass about those ponies. I want to know about the group that’s running around looking for something. We’ve noticed some of the groups we’ve kept an eye on have been slaughtered.”

Does he mean the ponies I’m trying to find? “Well that’s what I’ve been trying to find out. What little lead I had went cold when somepony blew up the building they were supposedly at.”

Novasurge pauses for a second to think about it, “Okay then. One more thing, We’ve gotten word of pegasus activity in the M.O.A hub. You’re our only pegasi on record in the Alpony sector. What are you planning?”

“I haven’t been to this M.O.A hub you’re talking about. I’ve only been out of that damn stable for less than a week Nova. I have no idea what’s happening in Equestria anymore.” He just leans back and nods his head slightly.

“Alright then.” He looks behind me at the two way mirror, “Alright, we can go ahead with the execution. Get her out of here.”

“Whoa what the fuck Nova! I gave you assholes what you wanted, now let me go!” I stand up and ready myself for a fight. Behind the glass right behind me I hear muffled yelling between a couple ponies. “Move out of my way Nova! We can end this peacefully or with you and a whole bunch of others getting seriously hurt!”

“Too bad I have another option.” He pulls a button from his jacket pocket and hits it. All at once my whole body is shot with a burst of electricity coming from the hoofcuffs around. I fall to the ground writhing in pain. “Move her back to her cell while we prepare.” I try to stand on my hooves but my body won’t let me. “See, I told you I would be prepared next time.”

Two guards walk in and drag me back across the hall to my cell. Apparently this time they thought they might as well be as rough as they could. They slam the cell shut quickly and lock it. I barely stand to my hooves and scream at them to come back, but they don’t acknowledge me. I fall back against the cold brick wall.

“Why does today have to be the worst fucking day ever…” I say to myself.

“I know how you feel Midnight…” Aera’s voice comes from across the room. This time she isn’t in her set of strange armor.

“Aera… I-” She stops me.

“You don’t have to say anything Midnight… It’s not your fault.” She walks up to the cell’s bars, and I notice her eyes are puffy from crying again, “I was behind the mirror when Novasurge gave the command for your execution… I tried to talk them out of it but I couldn’t.” She walks in front of the door and unlocks it, “Go Midnight, please.”

“Aera I can’t! What if you get caught! Who knows what they’ll do to you!” I pause for a moment, “I don’t want anypony getting killed over something that’s my fault. Especially you Aera. I may not really know you anymore, or who I am for that matter… But I know you’re a good pony... And I don’t want to see you die.“

“I love you Midnight, and I always will. Maybe someday you’ll remember who I am, and who you are. But for now I need you alive to figure that out.” She walks into the cell and stops in front of me, “I know you’ll get your memory back. Nothing has ever stopped you before. And nothing will stop you now…”

I embraced Aera in a hug. At one point in my life she was my only friend, somepony I wanted to spend my whole life with, to grow old together and start a family with… Up until today I wasn’t even sure she was real. As much as I still want that. I don’t want it with her. I want that with Stardust.

I let go of Aera and look into her eyes, their beautiful light purple color stares back longingly. “Somewhere inside me I know I still love you Aera… But there’s another pony that I love…” A small tear goes down her face, “But always know I’ll be there for you. Okay?” I gently kissed her forehead, “Goodbye Aera.”

She gives me a faint smile. I stand up and begin to run out of the room, stopping to look back, “If you ever need to find me, talk to a stallion in Riverdale named Stalk. He’ll know where I am.” I turn around and begin to follow my steps that I got when I first.

“Stay safe Midnight! I better see you alive next time!” I hear Aera call after me.

I run down the winding hallways, occasionally quickly dashing in and out of rooms to hide from the occasional pegasus. But I safely made it out. It took a lot of bravery to do what Aera did, and if anything were to happen to her I would make sure that whoever did it would suffer for the rest of their life.

I quickly dive through the cloud cover and begin my decent back down to Riverdale. I have a lot to explain to my friends.

…

The first thing I did when I got back to Riverdale was find Stardust and hug her. My heart has been torn out multiple times today in a tidal wave of emotions that doesn’t seem to care to stop. I explained who the red armored mare was and what the rest of them wanted from me. Neon was there too but was listening off to the side. He may not have acted like it but I can tell that he cared. And for the third time today I cried, not because of everything else before, but what I couldn’t say to the pony I was in love with.

…

It had taken me a while but I finally explained to my friends what happened. The whole time we were talking I stayed lying down in Stardust’s lap, which helped keep me calm. I had forced myself to stop crying when Stalk came in to check on me. Stalk never fully knew that I didn’t have my memories so I had to explain that to him just like everypony else.

“So the love of your simulated life is actually real and is crazy in love with you but you didn’t try and convince her to come with you?” Neon was surprised that I never brought Aera back with me, or that I even tried for that matter.

“I know that a part of me is still in love with her Neon, but I didn’t know the real her. It wouldn’t seem fair to her to be with somepony who doesn’t even know who they are.” I had been contemplating my decisions since I made it back to the hotel room. I know it was a bad thing to leave Aera with a broken heart, but I also knew that if we were together it wouldn’t be right. I don’t think anypony can stay with someone who they don’t actually love.

Stardust had stayed quiet for a while, occasionally wiping my tears away, “I think you did the right thing Midnight. It takes a strong heart to do what you did. But I also don’t think this will be the last time you two will cross paths.”

I nod slightly, “I know. I hope I get to see her again. Maybe we can start over from the beginning, become friends again.” I look over at Stalk, “I did tell her to find you if she ever needs me. You’re the only pony here I can really trust.”

“I mean if you three are leaving soon I’m not sure I can direct her to where you are, but I can promise ya I’ll look after her ‘till I can get a hold of ya.” He pauses for a moment, “When were ya planning on leaving anyways?”

As much as I love lying down on Stardust’s lap, we really should get going if we want to make any progress tonight. “Right now actually,” I check my PipBuck’s clock, it’s already almost one in the afternoon. I slowly sit up from Stardust’s lap, “We should leave if we want to make any progress before nightfall.” I roll off the bed onto my hooves and begin to put my saddlebags and holsters on. It will be nice to be back on the road, the more I stay in one place the more it seems bad things are destined to happen.

After putting everything in its right spot I turn around and notice that everypony is staring at me. “What?” All at once they all look at each other then back at me.

Stalk shakes his head and giggles, “I’m not sure how you can go from crying in your friend's lap to wanting to walk all the way across the Alpony outskirts at a moment's notice but that’s not my business.” He walks in front of me and holds out a hoof, “It was a pleasure meeting you Midnight Note, and I do hope that we’ll meet again soon. Try and stay out of trouble.”

“I hope things get better around here, Stalk. If you ever need anything, don’t hesitate to look us up. Thank you for everything.”
_____________________________________________________________________
Footnote: Level up! Sanity:74%

Tough Heart - You suffer no negative effects to Charisma when your Sanity is low!