Octavia Listens To Kanye West

by Belle_Goodmare

Rating: mature
Tags: Anon, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Octavia, Comedy, Profanity, DJ P0N-3, Human
Length: 1053

Anon offers to share his music taste to his friends Octavia, and Vinyl Scratch. Surely, not even Anon can ruin the simple act of putting on music right?

Octavia is into classical music. Vinyl likes techno, and EDM. Anon feels like he needs to enlighten his friends with the spiritual-lyrical gospel that is Kanye West or Ye.

Trigger warning: This story contains offensive language and should not be read by anyone who is easily offended or upset. This story doesn't reflect real world opinions of any racial or ethnic background, nor does it intend to promote discrimination.

Content Warning: Profanity, Tobacco Use, Sexual References, Anon.

Published 2023-01-08 19:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2023-01-08 19:20:01 UTC

A Lesson In Krankology

It was a chill summer Saturday night, and Anon decided to spend the weekend with his favorite power couple, Octavia and Vinyl. Even going as far as uncharacteristically asking for permission to come over the night before.

Anon respected the two; unlike the other peasants in Ponyville, Octavia and Vinyl were talented. Not even that bitch Twilight knew how to krank one like Vinyl Scratch and Octavia Melody. But Anon felt like his friends needed a small, quick lesson in krankology to truly be based.

Lesson one, Kanye.

Anon took a long drag from his cigarette as he relaxed on the couch on Vinyl’s side of the house, looking over to Octavia and Vinyl sitting next to each other on Octavia’s side of the room. Listening to some electronic mix of Beethoven.

Anon wondered if somepony was named Beethoven in this world and made the same music some hundreds of years ago. He compartmentalized that one for later. He was sure Twilight could answer his question with enough pestering per usual.

“Hey, Octavia,” called Anon, “You think Beethoven is a genius?”

Octavia scoffed, rolling her eyes at the human, “But of course! He is one of the greatest musical composers in history. Why?”

“Well, I have some albums of one of the greatest musical lyricists of our generation where I come from. He’s also a genius.” Anon said with a smile, slowly pulling several CDs from his suit jacket’s breast pocket.

Vinyl raised her brow as she looked over at her partner. Unlike Octavia, she didn’t mind dabbling into other artists and genres, but Octavia was a bit of a stickler for the classics and needed a bit of a push to listen to much else.

Octavia eyed Anon suspiciously, “You’re not going to play garbage, are you?....Wait do you carry those with you all the time?"

Anon crossed his arms, “I’m insulted you’d think I would do such a thing, and to answer your question. Yes I do in fact carry my CDs with me everywhere I go.”

“Anon, you were just let out of jail two days ago. So excuse me for exercising a bit of caution.” retorted Octavia.

“That’s irrelevant,” argued Anon.

Anon felt the weight in his right hand disappear suddenly, looking down to see Vinyl carrying the CDs to her speaker system and sifting through the few cases to see which one she liked. To her surprise, she didn’t recognize the artist. Looking up at Anon with a confused expression as she presented the albums to Anon and Octavia.

“Hmm…that one.” he’d point to the album labeled YEEZUS.

Octavia squinted, “Kanye West? Who the devil is that?”

“He’s from my world, and he’s a genius. Vinyl dear, put on Bound 2.”

Vinyl nodded, sliding the CD into the speaker before skipping the first nine songs before taking a seat next to Anon.

The beat would play through the speakers, its unique sound already drawing Vinyl’s attention. Octavia seemed a bit hesitant, expecting some sort of crude joke or loud noise to erupt through the speakers.

Vinyl bopped her head along to the beat, while Octavia took a more analytical approach to listening to the song. Carefully taking the lyrics into note.

“It’s…a touch vulgar but-”

“UH, I WANT TO FUCK YOU HARD ON THE SINK!”

“Anon!” snapped Octavia.

Anon laughed, smiling, “Oh c’mon, Octavia, I bet you do worse with Vinyl.”

Vinyl lowered her shades at Octavia, giving her a ‘he’s right’ look.

Octavia bit her lip, her cheeks burning red with embarrassment, “That’s….”

“Irrelevant?” offered Anon.

“Inappropriate.” glared Octavia. She’d clear her throat, “And he says this word that I don’t know the meaning of. Is it some sort of human term?”

Anon couldn’t help but grin, “And what word would that be, Octavia?”

Octavia pressed a hoof to her chin, “Nigga? Niggas? What does that mean?”

“Oh! It means friend; you call your friends nigga,” answered Anon, which was…technically the truth in specific contexts.

“So nopony is going to be OFFENDED by this word, are they? It’s not a swear word, is it?” pressed Octavia.

Anon nodded, “Nopony at all.” which was true, ~~black~~ African-American people didn’t live in Equestria, and he was the only human here. Besides, Anon could say it. He was green.

“In fact, another album has a great song about friendship and realness. It’s called ‘Nigga’s In Paris,’ you’d like that one.” grined Anon.

Octavia sighed, “Alright…but I don’t care for Kanye’s vulgar language. Also, what’s a Paris?”

“The Capital of France,” answered Anon.

“....You mean Prance?” corrected Octavia.

“Never mind,” replied Anon, quickly dodging another endless stream of questions. He made that mistake with Pinkie Pie and the Cutie Mark Crusaders. Getting trapped in an endless rabbit hole of questions.

Anon looked over to Vinyl, “Do you mind if I change the CD?”

Vinyl shook her head, gesturing to Anon with her hoof to go ahead. Anon got up, walking over to the speakers and CD player before putting ‘Watch The Throne’ into the CD player, skipping three tracks to, track number four, ‘Nigga’s In Paris.’

Vinyl once again bopped her head to the music, tapping her hoof to the beats as Octavia again scrutinized the lyrics. Her face scrunched up at every vulgarity, or suggestive lyric uttered from Kanye’s beautiful ~~black~~ African-American mouth.

Anon couldn’t help but smile as he watched Octavia sit up like him, pressing her hooves together as the cogs in her mind turned.

Octavia quickly perked her head up as she looked over to Vinyl and Anon, “You know, I just realized why that word sounded so familiar….”

Anon felt a twinge of fear in his heart. Did ponies have racial slurs? They kinda did for other species, but what creature in Equestria would warrant such a powerful word?

“It’s awfully similar to the word niggardly, which means stingy.” she said in a matter-of-fact tone, squinting suspiciously at the human, “Anon… you’re not lying to me, are you? Nigga means friend, right?”

Anon laughed, “Yes, Octavia, nigga means friend. I PROMISE.”

Octavia relaxed as she slowly leaned back in her seat, “Alright…but if you’re lying to me, I’m going to be really mad at you! In fact, I might be so mad…we won’t be nigga’s anymore.” hmpf’d Octavia crossing her arms.