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The sunlight was tinted orange as it came through the classroom's windows. Evening was steadily approaching sunset and the shadows were growing ever longer. The schoolhouse had been empty for several hours when the doors were suddenly thrown open again and two stallions stepped inside.

"I didn't even know you could rent the schoolhouse," Blue commented in surprise.

"On the weekends you can get it for the whole day, but every other day you can only get it for the last few hours," Red explained with a shrug of disinterest. "I thought it'd be the best place for our meeting."

Blue paused near the front of the room, eyeing the empty desks. There was something lonely about the space. "So what did you want to talk about?"

Red strolled right up to the chalkboard and easily found the stash of chalk. He raised one stick in the air dramatically as he turned back towards his friend. "It's time!"

The other stallion merely raised a brow. "For what?"

"To settle all the debates and arguments. To decide what it means to be a fan of size difference. You and me, right now, are going to clear up all the confusion."

"What confusion?" Blue blinked in confusion.

"This fandom is a mess," Red grumbled. "This place is a zoo and the animals are running wild. We need order. Rules. We need to establish some guidelines if we are going to turn this ragtag group into a respectable community."

Blue cringed. "And who put you in charge? Why do we need rules?"

"Rules keep everyone on the same page. As it is, when you're trying to find something macro or micro related, it's a coin toss if what comes up is even close. Rules will clean that up and make simply being a fan so much easier and more convenient."

"So... you want to make a list of everything ever made in this fandom?"

Red growled. "NO! I want everyone to agree to some terminology so we don't constantly get mislabeled garbage. That's the problem. No one agrees on the proper tags and terms when describing their work. You look for 'macro' and a whole bunch of 'micro' stuff comes up. You call yourself a macrophile and no one here seems to know what that means. We can't even decide if 'butt crush' is supposed to be one word or two!"

Blue scratched his head. "I don't know. You can't just storm out there and start telling people what to do. That's rude."

Red huffed. "I know I can't force anyone, but I can complain until they give in to my demands."

Blue shrugged. "Whatever."

"So are you going to help me or not?"

"With telling people what to do?"

"With deciding what to tell people to do."

Blue shrugged again. "I guess. But I'm not going to fight anyone for you. Unless you pay me."

Red rolled his eyes. "Fine. Then let's get started."

The stallion faced the chalkboard and scratched out two words.

"The first problem that needs to be fixed: microphile versus macrophile."

Blue quirked a brow. "Okay, I'll bite. What's wrong?"

"These two words are constantly mixed up," Red scoffed. "The suffix, -phile, means 'lover of'. Thus these two terms mean 'lover of micro' and 'lover of macro'. So a microphile loves micros and a macrophile loves macros."

"Makes sense to me," Blue nodded sagely.

Red growled. "So tell me, if you love stories or artwork with a macro in it, which are you?"

For a moment the other stallion hesitated. "A macrophile?" he eventually answered uncertainly.

Red actually snickered. "The correct answer is: maybe."

"I don't get it. I thought you said these terms had meaning, now they don't?"

"Whether a creation is macro or micro depends upon the perspective. For example, if its a story and the macro is the main character, then it is a microphile story. If it is a piece of art showing a giant rampage from one of the tiny's perspective, then it is for macrophiles."

Blue scratched his head. "Macro for microphiles, micro for... macrophiles? I don't get it."

Red waved him off. "A macrophile wants to be tiny. A microphile wants to be giant. These terms mean the opposite of the root word inside them. They get flipped around by the suffix. Remember, -phile means 'lover of'. Not 'want to be'. That's why these two terms get confused so much."

For a moment Blue didn't respond. Then he shrugged. "So... why should anyone care about this?"

"Don't you want to be right?"

"About things that matter, sure. But whether I describe myself as a macrophile or a microphile doesn't seem important."

"Yes it is!" Red asserted with a frustrated stomp. "When you introduce yourself you don't want to give the other pony the wrong impression. When you say 'I'm a macrophile' you want them to understand that means you like stories that feature giants. Or artwork where the camera is facing upward. It's about being accurate and clear communication."

Blue hummed. "I guess so."

Red snorted at his friend's halfhearted reply.

Author's Note

I was going to make this an entire short story, but I soon realized the joke would wear off quickly and people might start to find this piece annoying. I've already made my point anyway. This community has issues, but how serious is up for debate. I tried to play these two characters as the extreme ends of the argument. One is obsessed with rules and precise definitions while the other is relaxed and unconcerned. Though I personally side more with Red. I think this fandom could benefit from a bit more organization.