Advice

by Comicizzum

Rating: everyone
Tags: Main 7 (EqG), Discord, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance, Equestria Girls
Length: 3813

In need of help but unable to go to his pony friends, Discord goes to the next best thing for advice.

Having a very specific problem, and afraid certain ponies will blab, Discord travels illegally through the Mirror to seek the help of the Rainbooms. While they do -reluctantly- help him, perhaps there is another reason the Lord of Chaos has disturbed their weekly breakfast get-together.

Day Five of #FluttercordWeek2023: Human and Ponies

Published 2023-01-23 17:30:00 UTC
Last updated 2023-01-23 17:30:00 UTC

Chapter 1

In the dark of the night, all of Ponyville slept except for one solitary creature. Slinking through the shadows, the lengthy mismatched figure of Discord quickly made his way towards the Castle of Friendship. Flashing inside, he slithered on the ceiling towards his destination, the thrill of breaking the rules spurring him onward.

After checking the coast was clear, he phased through the door. Below, in all its magical scientific glory, was the contraption Twilight Sparkle had created to venture to the Mirror World whenever she wanted. Discord quietly chuckled, rubbing his paw and claw together. While there were plenty of other ways to reach the other world, this was by far the most risky- and it would drive Twilight nuts to know he'd slipped past her security spells and used her machine without any effort at all.

Discord snapped up a watch and placed it on his arm before flying like a bullet straight into the mirror.

He cackled at the crazy sensation of being yanked and pulled through the magical vortex. A moment later he stepped out of the mirror's other side and took a deep breath of polluted city air.

"Ahhh," he said with satisfaction, "It's good to be back!"

Fluttershy nervously clutched the strap of her purse as she walked down the street. Though she had checked three different times, she couldn’t shake the feeling she was being watched. Her anxiety was reaching its apex by the time Dozy Dough Café came into view. She practically ran for the door, throwing it open and tripping slightly on the threshold.

“Wow, Fluttershy, what’s your hurry?” Rainbow Dash asked, catching her before she could scratch her knee.

Fluttershy looked behind her, waiting for the door to open again and reveal her invisible stalker. Unfortunately, it remained closed.

“Whatcha looking at?” Pinkie Pie asked, joining the staring contest with the door.

Fluttershy shook her head. “All the way here I could swear someone was following me.”

“Did you see anyone?” Sunset Shimmer asked with concern.

"Unfortunately, no," said Fluttershy, shaking her head.

The door opened then and the four girls whipped around. Their friends, Applejack, Rarity, and Twilight, came in.

“Um, any reason for the death glares?” asked the cowgirl.

“Some creep is stalking Fluttershy,” said Rainbow Dash angrily.

“What?” Twilight said while Rarity exclaimed, “Oh, darling, that's terrible!"

"I didn't see any shifty characters out there just now," said Applejack.

Fluttershy yanked on her hair. “It might have just been my imagination.”

“Maybe, but I'm not taking any chances," said Rainbow Dash. "Where are you heading after this?”

“Um, the animal shelter. I took an extra shift today.”

“I’m walking you there,” Rainbow Dash said, her tone brooking no argument.

"And just cause I didn't see anything doesn't mean I'm right," said Applejack. "I'll come with the two of you."

“Okay,” Fluttershy muttered, rather grateful and relieved for the promised company.

The group made it to the front of the line and ordered their drinks and pastries. Fluttershy chose a cup of ginseng tea and a strawberry croissant. Pushing a couple of tables together, the girls sat down with their orders and started catching up. Now that they’d graduated, each of them had taken slightly different paths but remained in the city.

Twilight was in the middle of sharing her favorite college class when Sunset held up her hand.

“Guys,” she said, her voice on edge, “nobody around us is moving.”

Fluttershy looked around to see Sunset was right. It was as if someone had frozen time. The couple next to them were about to share a kiss, the waitress cleaning up a nearby table was in the middle of wiping it down, a man by the door was on his cellphone, lips mid-part, and the worker behind the counter was filling up a drink but the iced tea had only made it halfway up the cup.

Being no strangers to magic, the girls leapt to their feet, immediately on high alert.

“How strange," Rarity muttered, peering outside, "Nothing is frozen out there.”

“That doesn’t make any sense,” said Twilight, joining her near the window.

A sudden, deep-throated chuckle echoed all around them and the girls huddled in close. Fluttershy even squeaked, her pupils shrinking as she latched onto Applejack’s arm.

“Sense? What fun is there in making sense?” asked the disembodied voice.

“Who’s there?” Rainbow Dash said.

“Show yourself!” demanded Sunset.

“If you insist.”

There was a pop and a flash of light. Standing next to Fluttershy was the strangest creature she had ever seen.

He was tall, his serpentine body divided into three different sections. His head was gray and similar to a pony’s with red and yellow eyes surrounded by dark gray circles. A large snaggle tooth stuck out of his mouth and a long thin goat beard sprouted from his chin. He had thick bushy eyebrows and two mismatched horns on his head; one a blue goat horn, the other a deer antler. A bat wing and a blue pegasus wing poked out behind his long brown torso. His right arm was from a lion and his left looked like it came from an eagle. He had a beautiful red snake tail with a white tuft on the end and a lizard foot and a goat hoof for legs.

Fluttershy found him both terrifying and fascinating.

“Discord?!” Sunset cried in surprise.

“You know this thing?” asked Rainbow Dash.

“This thing, Miss Dash, has a name," he said with a tsk. "Discord, Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony!" He threw his hands out and a burst of confetti exploded behind him like miniature fireworks. "And I must say it is so nice to finally meet you ladies! Princess Twilight has said so many nice things about you.”

"Discord, what are you doing here?" Sunset demanded. "And how are you not a human?"

Discord booped her nose. "Oh, dear Sunset, how little you know! I am the literal Spirit of Chaos! I'm not tied down by the rules and logistics of world hopping! But, if it will make the rest of your friends comfortable…"

In a flash, the creature was replaced by a man. His extra appendages were now missing but his features were still fairly similar. His brown dress shirt was completely missing the right sleeve, exposing a golden yellow arm. The other sleeve had been ripped at the elbow, a bright yellow arm revealed on the left. A vest covered his lithe torso, one half black, the other blue. His pants were also brown, held up by a red belt with a white buckle. His left dress shoe was brown while his right was green. The completely chaotic ensemble made Rarity ill but Fluttershy silently thought it rather… nice.

Discord pulled out a mirror and examined his features. After a moment, his reflection started talking.

"Hmmm, not bad,” it said. “The slight white streaks near the temples are a bit much but you make it work, you sly devil!"

Discord pretended to blush. "Oh, you always say the nicest things! Do you think Fluttershy will like this version of us?"

"How could she not?" his reflection smirked. "She's loved every animal we've changed into so far."

"I hate to break up… whatever this is," said Sunset, "But, now that you're human, would you mind unfreezing time in here?"

"Oh, I suppose," he said, pulling out a pair of gloves. The right was brown and fingerless while the left was whole and yellow with vertical black stripes. "Ahhh, much better," he sighed before snapping his fingers together. The café started moving again.

"Wow! Neat trick!" said Pinkie Pie. "Can I get a pair of those?"

"It's not about the gloves, my dear, but I'd be happy to refine your affinity to chaos magic like your other half."

"What?!" Sunset cried, looking at Pinkie. "She has chaos magic?"

"She has the ability to harness chaos magic and use it to her advantage," Discord confirmed. "But I'm not here to go into all the ins and outs of how chaos magic exists in this world. I'm here to pick your brains about something else. Something extremely important."

"And what might that be?" asked Applejack, folding her arms distrustfully.

"Well, I'm not certain if Twilight has shared this little information with you -her full ascension to the throne has left her rather occupied as of late- but Fluttershy and I have been an item now for almost a year and-"

"Hold up!" Rainbow Dash cried as Fluttershy gasped. "You two can't be a thing!"

She pointed between the human Fluttershy and him. Discord rolled his eyes.

"I see you’re just as prone as our Rainbow Dash to draw to the wrong conclusion,” he said before addressing the shy girl. "While you are truly lovely, my dear, the pony Fluttershy is who I’m talking about."

"You and the o-other me are together?" Fluttershy said, blinking several times as she tried to process how she felt about this.

Discord nodded, a wide, happy smile on his face.

"But you're an entirely different species!" said Twilight, examining him through her glasses.

Discord chuckled. "Twilight, you just saw me change my appearance on a dime. I could easily date Fluttershy as a stallion but she likes me as is."

"I'm sorry," said Rarity, "but I honestly can't see the appeal."

Discord scowled. "I didn't come to hear your judgy opinions. Honestly, the only reason I'm here is because you're the next best option I have."

"What's that supposed to mean?" asked Applejack.

"It means I would have approached your pony selves but some of them" -a flash of arrows appeared over Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie's heads- "might spill the beans and I'd rather keep this on the down low."

He paused and looked around before leaning in and muttering, "You see, I plan to propose to Fluttershy in the very near future."

The girls gasped around the table, Fluttershy's jaw dropping significantly.

"Yes, yes, it’s all very exciting," said Discord, ignoring the slight horror on Sunset's face, "But my problem is I don't know exactly how to go about doing that. I’d like to hear what each of you would call the ideal proposal so I can come up with something epic, unforgettable, and totally worthy of the greatness that is Fluttershy!"

Fluttershy sat there, stunned. This creature had positively terrified her when he'd first appeared and, if her instincts were correct, he was the one following her here unseen. Why would the other Fluttershy fall for him? True, he was fascinating with his mismatched animal parts but he also seemed unpredictable and that left her feeling wary.

“Why not ask a pony about this stuff?" argued Rainbow Dash.

"Yeah, they’d have better ideas than us. Besides, it's not like we know your Fluttershy," said Applejack. "Princess Twilight and our Twilight have some similarities yet they're two different people, uh, ponies, uh- oh, ya know what I mean!"

Discord sighed. "Look, I know you're not the same as the pony friends I have but you're similar enough to at least give me some ideas. Come on; can’t you help a troubled draconequus out?”

Sunset sighed. “I…guess. If that’s okay with everyone else.”

All of the girls nodded; Fluttershy, Twilight, Rainbow Dash, and Applejack did so reluctantly.

“Right,” said Discord, summoning a paper pad and a quill from behind his ear, “What would each of you say is the ultimate proposal?"

"Somewhere at a party!" Pinkie Pie immediately cried, throwing her hands in the air.

"Skydiving," Rainbow Dash said with a shrug.

Rarity clasped her hands together. "Oh, at an elegant soiree celebrating my work, for sure! With the most elite in the city in attendance. And he'd propose right in the middle of the dance floor with the most romantic music playing. We would be the center of attention and would spend the rest of the evening dancing among the stars!"

She seemed to get lost in some kind of fantasy, her eyes slowly losing focus as she let out a dreamy sigh.

"Of course you'd want to make it complicated," Applejack muttered.

Rainbow Dash nudged her. "What would you prefer then?"

The cowgirl lowered her stetson and mumbled, "Sunrise on the farm. It's simple, personal, and unsolicited. I'm of the opinion that such things should be private rather than shouted from the rooftops like a rooster announcing' the morning."

"What about you, Twilight?" asked Rainbow Dash.

"Me?" she said, pointing at herself. "Why do I have to share?"

"Because we're all curious," said Rarity, coming out of her haze.

Twilight blushed and looked down at her drink. "Observatory, at night, just the two of us."

"Ha! I knew it!" Rainbow Dash laughed.

"Oh, leave her alone!" said Applejack, shoving their fast friend’s shoulder. "She's entitled to whatever she likes."

"Right," Discord said, looking up from the pad, quill in hand, "Most of your answers have been what I expected- except yours, Twilight. I was sure you were going to say the library."

"I do love the library," she assured, pushing up her glasses, "But the study of astronomy is something I've always found rather fascinating."

“Hmmm.” Discord studied her a moment more before turning to Sunset. "And your ideal proposal?"

Sunset shrugged. "At a museum in front of one of my favorite paintings. That or a gaming convention. Either one works for me."

Discord quickly wrote down her answer before turning to Fluttershy. "And you, my dear?"

Fluttershy tugged on her hair, partially hiding behind it. Her friends all had wonderful places and ideas. If she shared hers, they'd only laugh.

"Fluttershy?" Rarity questioned.

"I…" she began but her voice died away.

She hid further behind her hair, her anxiety growing. To her surprise, Discord came to her rescue.

"It's alright, Fluttershy," he said. "I have enough material here to come up with something I'm sure my Flutters will love."

“Are-Are you sure?" she asked, biting her lip.

He stood up. "Oh, yes! I have plenty of ideas stirring around in my head."

"Now, hang on!" said Rainbow Dash. "We all shared ours. Shouldn't Fluttershy share hers? She'll probably have the most accurate idea of what your girlfriend would like!"

"While that may be true," said Discord, "I didn't bind any of you to some kind of contract to share your thoughts. If Fluttershy doesn't want to share, she has the right not to."

The other girls looked stunned.

"You mean we didn't have to say anything at all?!" Applejack shrieked.

Discord chuckled. "Nope. But thank you for your idea, Applejack. A sunrise is very romantic."

The cowgirl angrily folded her arms and refused to make eye contact with anyone.

The disguised draconequus smirked. "Well, ladies, thank you for your time. But I believe I need to be heading back to Equestria."

Fluttershy's head shot up. "You're leaving?"

"Oh, yes. I fear Princess Twilight might have already figured out that there was a break in."

"Break in?" Sunset repeated. "What break in? Discord, what did you do?"

"I may or may not have broken into the Friendship Castle last night and used the Mirror without permission, causing unnecessary panic."

“What?”

“And that’s my cue!” he said.

Standing up, he hastened for the exit. Sunset furiously pulled out her journal and started writing a message to the pony princess.

“What a weird guy,” said Rainbow Dash, watching his retreating back.

“Super odd dude,” Pinkie Pie agreed, “but I liked him.”

“He was definitely… exotic,” Rarity said with a frown.

Fluttershy suddenly stood up.

“Fluttershy?” Applejack questioned.

“I’ll be right back,” she muttered, rushing out of the café.

Discord was just about to turn the corner when she emerged. She followed, rushing down the sidewalk, preparing to call out to stop him. Unexpectedly, he startled her because he was simply leaning against the wall just around the street corner, his arms folded and a smile on his face.

“Why, Fluttershy, fancy seeing you here,” he said, flashing his teeth.

“You-How-Huh?” she said, gaping. “You knew I’d follow you?”

He chuckled. “I didn’t rule out the possibility. That’s why I didn’t just flash away.”

“Oh.”

A slightly awkward moment passed before Discord said, “Was there something you needed?”

Fluttershy felt like such a fool. Her wariness had been challenged by Discord's unexpected kindness back in the café. It was almost like he knew she was afraid of being ridiculed and had provided her with an out. She'd judged him too harshly. That was why she'd changed her mind.

Nervously fiddling with her hair, she muttered, “In the back of the crowd in the middle of a Skullcruncher concert while they sing ‘Bleeding for You’. That’s my answer.”

Discord stared.

“Because everyone would be distracted by the band," she hastily continued, "And there would be music and it would be outside at night so nobody would see and-”

Discord placed a finger over her lips, an amused smile on his face.

“And that is why I knew I would like you,” he chuckled.

“Like me?” she repeated.

“Not in that way,” he assured. “My heart belongs solely to my favorite pony but, as a friend, yes.”

“Friend,” Fluttershy repeated before a small smile climbed her face, “I think I'd like that. You’re… an interesting person, Discord.”

He laughed. “So are you. A metalhead; my Fluttershy is one as well. Except they don’t have any Skullcrunchers where I’m from. The band she likes is called Poison Rose.”

Fluttershy’s eyes widened. “She likes heavy metal too?”

“Oh yes,” Discord said joyfully. “And how delightfully chaotic it is, that one such as herself would enjoy such a genre. And yet, it suits her perfectly; as it does you.”

Fluttershy couldn’t stop herself from blushing. “That’s…a really nice thing to say.”

“It’s the truth,” he said sincerely.

Another moment passed but it wasn’t as awkward as before. Fluttershy dug the point of her shoe into the sidewalk.

“So, will we see you around?” she asked.

He looked at his watch. “Hmmm, if my calculations are correct, you should bump into the other me any time now. As for myself, I’m sure I can make a hop across worlds for a chat. I may even bring my own Fluttershy. We’ll make a party out of it.”

“That would be wonderful!” Fluttershy said before registering what he’d said. “Wait- the other you?”

“Oh! Look at the time!” he said, checking his watch again. “I simply must be going. It was wonderful to meet you, Fluttershy. I wish you two all the happiness in the world.”

He then completely invaded her personal space by kissing her hand before vanishing in a flash of light.

Fluttershy, utterly confused and slightly flustered, shook her head. She turned the corner to head back to the café but cried out in surprise as she accidentally bumped into someone. Before she could hit the ground, a golden arm reached out to steady her.

“Thanks,” she said. “I’m terribly sorry- I didn’t mean to-”

She froze as her eyes met a pair of rubies surrounded in a sea of yellow.

“No harm done,” her rescuer said, his bushy eyebrows rising in surprise. “Are you alright?"

"Yes," she said.

She knew she was staring but she couldn't bring herself to look away. After all, he looked just like him but something was different; something she was very much drawn towards.

He looked slightly abashed as he rubbed his forearm and asked, "I hope I’m not being too forward when I ask this but, have we met before?”

Fluttershy’s cheeks began to burn. “Um, maybe?”

“Hmmm. Well," he said, smiling down at her, "Since it would seem we're both having difficulty with recollection, would it be too bold of me to ask you to tea sometime?”

“Huh?” Fluttershy said stupidly before shaking her head and saying, “Oh! Um, sure. I like tea.”

“Excellent! Will Tuesday next at the Dozy Dough work for you? Around two o’clock?”

“S-Sure,” she said, slightly dazed.

Was this really happening?

The man smiled. “See you then.” He strolled passed but then paused. “Miss? I’m afraid I didn’t catch your name.”

“Oh, it’s Fluttershy,” she said.

“Discord,” he introduced, shaking her hand. “I look forward to seeing you again.”

“Me too,” she said weakly.

Discord chuckled before going on his way. Fluttershy waved weakly as he disappeared around the corner.

Up above, watching the encounter from a rooftop, the Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony smiled before vanishing back to his world.

Several months later, Fluttershy woke to find an odd looking letter sitting on her dressing table. At first she thought it was from her boyfriend, Cordy, but when she opened it, the sender became clear.

Dear Fluttershy,

I’m truly grateful for the advice you and your friends gave when I intrusively interrupted your weekly get-together all those moons ago.

I decided to implement several of your suggestions and make a lovely date and proposal befitting both Fluttershy and myself. We started the day with a sunrise, then spent some time at a surprise party for Twilight (she was getting a little overwhelmed with her duties so Pinkie decided to step in) before wandering through the Canterlot gardens; my personal prison for a thousand years. Ask Sunset Shimmer to elaborate if you don’t understand that last bit. I wanted Fluttershy to know that if it weren’t for her, I’d probably still be there.

Anyway, after that sappy moment, I snapped the two of us to a remote island that I discovered a long time ago. There is a rather interesting lake in the center, surrounded by bluebells, that perfectly reflects the sky at night. We had an upside down picnic next to the lake and, sometime after Twilight raised the moon and brought out the stars, I turned on one of Fluttershy’s favorite Poison Rose songs. I asked her to dance and guided her towards the center of the lake where I popped the question.

She said yes, if you must know.

Due to her love of flowers, I immortalized one of the bluebells -which, coincidentally, has the meaning of everlasting love- as a hairclip. Fluttershy said it was better than a ring and I think I have to agree; it holds up her mane beautifully too.

Anyway, I owe it all to you and your friends so I’m inviting you all to the wedding! Please RSVP by writing a response on the back of this letter; it’ll find its way back to me once I know who to expect. We will be married three moons from today. I’m sure that gives you plenty of time to prepare.

Wishing you all the chaotic kindness in the world,

Discord

Spirit of Chaos and Harmony

P.S. I’m glad things seem to be going so well for you and Cordy. You totally deserve each other! Ta!