Winds of Stagnation

by Burningbloom78

Rating: teen
Tags: Fluttershy, Suicide / Self Harm, Sad, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Zephyr Breeze
Length: 4640

While taking a break from an awesome flight around Ponyville, Rainbow Dash heads to the marketplace for anything that might catch her eyes. Unfortunately, her eyes land on a certain stallion she wished to avoid, but something was wrong about him.

After a wonderous flight around the Ponyville airspace leads Rainbow Dash to peruse the marketplace for anything that was just as awesome as she is, she comes across the brother of her best friend Fluttershy, Zephyr Breeze, a stallion she wanted as much to do with as being grounded from flying.

However, the multi-colored mare spotted that something was bothering the errant stallion, and as much as she dislikes him, he was Fluttershy's brother, and she didn't like to see him all... whatever that was plastered across his face, so she heads over to see what the problem was. Besides, the mare was sure that her very presence will knock the funk out of the stallion and bring him back to his usual insufferable self.

Little did she know that something was wrong with Zephyr, something very wrong.

Published 2023-02-08 23:10:00 UTC
Last updated 2023-02-08 23:10:00 UTC

Petered Out

There was always wind in his sails; he roamed from here to there, to this and that, anywhere the wind took him. He never seemed to be truly lost; floating adrift to places unknown, with a purpose that was never truly his. He'd always find something else; it was just who he was.

But even so...the wind will eventually die, and he will find himself stuck; going nowhere; petering out to nothing with his drive empty; he realized it was all a pathetic waste of effort. Perhaps it was to be expected. And what happens next may be the only thing he does right.

A zip here, a dive there, a double loop over there, and a backflip right over here, followed by a corkscrew and ending with a front flip. Not good enough; she could do better. She tried again. Stronger. Faster. Not good enough; try again. Impress. Amaze. Shock. If she became the very wind herself, she'll achieve this goal. Try again. Harder this time. Riskier than the last. Become the wind.

It goes on for hours until she throws in the towel after a day of miraculous flying. She knew she'd get this down; it was only a matter of time. Rainbow Dash was tenacious; she knew if she kept banging her head against this wall, its foundation would splinter and crack, allowing her to enter into the ever-familiar taste of victory. In time, she knew very well she'd be triumphant.

Whilst taking a break from flying, Rainbow Dash decided to head on over to the Ponyville Market for anything that catches her eye; she wanted something awesome, as usual, to radiate her awesomeness as one would typically do, of course; like Tank, her dutiful pet tortoise. That animal might be slow as molasses, but he has shown Rainbow Dash that speed wasn't everything, but also loyalty.

Deep in thought about her lovable pet tortoise, Rainbow Dash's attention is suddenly snatched by a glint coming from a nearby stand. Narrowing her eyes, the mare spots an awesome blue necklace with a lightning-shaped pendant. Entranced by the sheer awesomeness blaring off the necklace, Rainbow's mouth went agape, and her eyes widened into giant orbs as the necklace continued to mesmerize her in its enticing thrall.

Immediately, she thought about how "sick", as in cool, would that look around her neck. It was sure to draw the attention of her friends if she paraded that incredible-looking necklace. Every pony would be talking about where she got it from. She gushes at all the potential attention that the necklace would garner.

It was simple. Rainbow Dash had to have it. She was about to race over to the item until she lifted her head to see the pony selling it, and immediately her enthusiasm died. It was simply amazing how excited a pony could be for something just to have it disappear.

She thought about the time when the latest Daring Do book was published and how she had forgotten to check the release date at the local library. It was sold out and she wouldn't get another shipment for weeks. She had despaired to the point of not wanting to ever fly again, but that was until her eggheaded friend Twilight Sparkle managed to stash a copy away just for her as a gift.

Rainbow Dash had wished it was another pony, a trick of the light playing her eyes, but it was most certainly real. Dismayed, she prayed and prayed it wasn't him, but they weren't answered. Why did it have to be him out of all the ponies she had come across over the years? Why must it be him? It wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't manning the stand selling the necklace she wanted so badly.

Light green with a pathetically wrapped long blonde mane, along with a horrible-looking scruff was Zephyr Breeze, Fluttershy's good-for-nothing, freeloading, lazy-headed, nausea-inducing, aggravating failure and disappointment of a brother, who is detested by the rainbow-maned mare herself for his sickening infatuation with her.

If he had wanted to find a stable job he didn't suck at, he could start by looking more presentable and cleaner. Rainbow Dash chuckled wryly to herself. If Zephyr didn't look like a hobo and took care of himself and let his mane down, put on a dress and makeup, he'd pass as a cute-looking mare. Surely then somepony would give him the time worth whatever Zephyr was; give him a better use for that motor mouth of his.

It was good, but an otherwise cruel distraction. This was a troublesome crisis. What was she to do? Leave and save herself the massive headache or brave the onslaught of terrible and vomit-filled compliments from the loser himself and purchase the necklace. It was a tough decision: pain or no pain. There was no compromise or in-between; this goes either one way or the other, but each pathway presented a loss, at least, for Rainbow Dash.

Get the necklace but lose a part of herself or leave and have somepony else nab the awesome necklace while she watches? The more she thought, the more distraught she became.

"No," she muttered to herself, "you get that necklace. Sure, it'll mean you'll have to be around... ugh, him, but the necklace? It's worth the hassle."

Straining to suppress the scowl that would inevitably etch itself across her face, Rainbow Dash sighed inwardly and strode forward. With each reluctant step taken, a pit of loathing grew in Rainbow Dash's stomach, roiling uncomfortably; she wanted to turn back for she feared she might vomit from being too close to Zephyr, but she forced herself to move onward with an objective guiding her hoofsteps: Get that necklace.

When she looked at Zephyr Breeze, Rainbow Dash noticed he seemed a bit down in the dumps, which isn't something she saw often. The roiling of her stomach lessened a bit as a shadow of worry crept into her heart. She shouldn't feel this for a stallion his stature, but she couldn't ignore his plight; he is Fluttershy's younger brother, her best friend from fillyhood.

As much as she dislikes him, it would be wise to figure out his troubles before they got out of hoof. Besides, the mare was Rainbow Dash, the unwilling object of Zephyr Breeze's affection; if she so much as called out his name it would be more than enough to get rid of whatever was bothering the stallion. What happens after is any pony's guess, yet anything that did happen would be to the detriment of her sanity.

Having approached the stand, Rainbow Dash begrudgingly called out to the stallion. His ears pricked and the mare groaned inwardly, squinting her eyes as if to cringe at what was to come, but she couldn't have been further from the truth. She expected the annoying stallion to whip around and give her that eminently punchable smirk whenever he was trying to "flirt" with her, which never worked, only achieving her disgust rather than her interest. When he did turn around, it was slow and careful, like he was trotting on eggshells or something.

When he faced her, it wasn't the bright smile of a desperate stallion vying for the attention of something he could never hope to reach, but one of sadness and exhaustion. The expression was so alien on this pitiful creature that Rainbow Dash recoiled slightly. It was tough to believe that this was the confident Zephyr Breeze, at least when it came to trying to win her affection.

He looked gaunt and skinnier than usual, under his dim eyes were dark bags that sagged, his scruffy beard was even more scruffy than before and unkempt, his blonde mane and tail looked dull and bedraggled, and his light green coat had lost its shine. When she looked into his dimly lit eyes, there was an intensity to them, a seriousness of something she could not hope to guess, but they seemed to be fixated on something, even though Zephyr looked directly at her.

This was something she did not expect. He looked so different, but not in a good way. It was bad. Rainbow Dash had never seen him look so defeated. It was very unsettling. There was no happiness in his dead gaze, the smirk she had expected was gone completely as if it had never graced Zephyr Breeze's visage. Oddly enough she wanted that smirk. That's when she knew he was okay, but it was gone, and Zephyr was not okay.

"Rainbow Dash." His usual annoyingly cheery voice that grated her ears was notably absent, replaced by something low and reserved, and the way he said her name with no care or enthusiasm brought a pang of hurt. "What can I do for you?"

Where was the smile, the flamboyant motion of his movement, the flirting, the confidence, the laziness? Where are the things that made this annoying stallion annoying? What happened to Zephyr Breeze? Where were all the things Rainbow Dash expected and wanted?

Concerned, she asks, "Zephyr, are you okay? You seem...not yourself."

A small shadow of a smile appeared across his face. Rainbow Dash might have felt how she always did when Zephyr smiled, but that smile was different. It was a smile that displayed no genuine joy; it was a facade. Zephyr never smiled like that; it just wasn't him. He'd give a large smile that showed off his pearly white teeth. But the smile he showed was ugly and fake; Rainbow disliked it greatly, but she didn't say so out loud to prevent from causing a scene.

"I'm fine," he answered with a tip of his head to one side. "Is there anything you like?"

Rainbow fought to stop a worried scowl at Zephyr Breeze's apparent indifference. He treated her like any other customer, and that wasn't right. She's the love of his life, the pony he flirts and fails with, the one he pads after with no hesitation. And it's just gone! But where to?! Where's Zephyr?!

"I think I know what brought you to this stand," Zephyr said, his tone distant. He looks at the wares displayed and points to the lightning-shaped necklace. "That, right?"

Rainbow Dash almost assumed that this was another one of Zephyr's attempts to flirt with her, knowing she'd see the necklace and wanted it, giving him the sublime opportunity to speak with her, and for a good reason as well. A few minutes ago, she might've thought that, but Zephyr's tone was genuine. He had never thought about using the necklace to attract her to him. The old Zephyr would've done that without hesitation.

It was funny. Rainbow Dash was starting to realize she missed the old Zephyr. They had this whole thing going on between them, and now it's been broken by this imposter. She wanted it back. She wanted Zephyr to be his old self again, but something told her that wasn't going to happen.

"Uh, yeah," she mumbled awkwardly, trying to not let the uneasiness show in her voice. "It looked cool, and I was thinking about buying it and showing it off to my friends." The more she looked at the necklace, the more the need for it lessened. Her eagerness for the awesome necklace was overshadowed by the pit of worry welling inside her stomach. "But I'm...not sure if I want it anymore."

"It's a very nice necklace; you would look great in it," he told the mare tersely. His succinct words made Rainbow Dash's coat bristle. Though distant and cold, Zephyr's compliment made the mare look away for a moment. "If you want it," Zephyr continued, unaware of his compliment, "it'll be thirty-five bits."

Rainbow Dash mentally hit herself. She had forgotten to bring some bits to buy the necklace!

Groaning, she says, "I forgot my bits at home. Let me go and get them!" Before she could race off, Zephyr held a hoof in the air to stop her. Turning to the stallion, Rainbow noticed a small glint in his eyes.

"I'll pay for it and give it to you," he said, digging at something behind the stand, presumably his saddlebags for the money.

Rainbow Dash was baffled. Why would Zephyr do something so incredibly affable and generous? She'd expect that from Rarity, not from a stallion like Zephyr. She felt kind of bad for making fun of him in her mind.

Acting a bit flustered at the kind and very, very gracious offer, Rainbow waved her wings in the air in protest. "Zephyr, I got the money at home; you don't need to buy it from your stall. You know I'll be back in a few seconds."

"I understand," came his muffled reply. He raises his head, dangling a small bag in his mouth, and releases exactly thirty-five bits on the wooden counter. He set the bag inside his saddlebags and grabs the lightning-shaped necklace and set it on the counter. "I wanted to do something nice for you, at least once. Something I know you might appreciate greatly. And by the way, this isn't my stall, I'm just covering for somepony; he'll be back very soon."

Memory harkens back to Rainbow Dash. Wasn't Zephyr a mane therapist or something? What happened with that? She remembers Zephyr passing a school he had to go to pursue his life as a mane therapist. Did something happen?

Letting out a silent exhale of air, Rainbow asks, "Zephyr, why are you here, in Ponyville? Aren't you supposed to do...mane therapy?" She immediately regretted asking as the tiny glint in Zephyr's eyes died completely.

His eyes, void and expressionless, stared listlessly at the unsettled mare. "For a time, it worked out, but nothing seems to last long for me," he said dully. "The passion was gone one day, and it never came back. Perhaps it was to be expected from a disappointment like me. I tried, Rainbow, I did, but...I failed. And..."

Disheartened by the cynic words of this stallion, Rainbow Dash attempted to block out the depressing explanation by focusing on an odd ring around Zephyr's neck. They were deep, rugged marks, and very fresh. A prickle of anxiety shot through Rainbow Dash's heart. She did not know why but she knew it wasn't good. Not good at all.

"Zephyr," she spoke cautiously, cutting off the stallion, "what are...those marks around your neck?"

Seemingly perplexed, Zephyr felt the base of his neck with a hoof and froze. To Rainbow, a look of realization sparkled in the stallion's eyes as if he had forgotten, but then it was quickly dismissed.

"That's from an... another failure," he told the worried mare. He shuffled lightly on his hooves. "A-anyway, you wanted to know why I was here?"

Although noticing the will to shift the conversation, Rainbow didn't press. An unknown fear had sneaked into her mind, and she wanted to be as far away from that fear as possible. Silent, she nodded.

"I wanted to see you and Fluttershy before I leave." His voice became deep and hoarse. "Maybe...only you to talk to."

Thoroughly confused and... a bit unhappy, Rainbow Dash asks, "Leave? Where are you going?"

That fake smile appeared on Zephyr's face. "Somewhere far away," he told her, his empty eyes fixated on something far beyond where Rainbow Dash couldn't hope to begin to follow. "I won't be coming back."

Rainbow Dash noticed she was taking in rapid gulps of air and made an effort to calm herself down, but it was in vain. "I-I don't understand," she said, a tremble in her voice. "Where are you going?"

"A place where you can't fly towards no matter how fast and where Fluttershy will never find me," he responded despondently. "I'll go there when I leave Ponyville."

"You can't just up and leave!" Rainbow Dash spat, more harshly and passionately than she had wanted. "What about Fluttershy and your family? What about your job?"

Zephyr was unmoved by Rainbow Dash's heated retort. "My family doesn't need somepony like me. I've been nothing but trouble. I've lost the will and the passion for my job; I'm giving up."

Enough was enough. "Zephyr, you aren't fine," Rainbow said, her hoof touching his. It was trembling. "There is something wrong here. I think you need help."

Zephyr glanced at their hooves touching and swiped his away gently. "I want you to do something for me. When I leave, tell Fluttershy I'm not coming back. Tell her to not come looking for me. She will never find me, and it will break her kind heart if she tries."

"Why are you speaking like this?!" she shouted, gaining some attention from other ponies before they lose interest. "What happened to the Zephyr Breeze I used to know? Why are you saying all of this? I want the old you back. Aren't you going to flirt with me or do something I expect from you?!"

The barren expression across Zephyr's countenance caused Rainbow Dash's anger to ebb away like a receding tide. He wasn't affected by her pleas in the slightest.

"I love you," he muttered softly, the most genuine Rainbow Dash ever heard from him. "But I could never be with you. I'm too much of a failure to do right with you. I'll just screw everything up. As much as I wanted you, I know I will never have you. It's just who I am. And I'm sorry..."

A ripple of emotions overcame Rainbow Dash's heart; she could feel an onset of tears beginning to well up in her eyes. "Stop speaking like this!" she pleaded. "This isn't you!"

Again, Zephyr was unmoved by Rainbow's emotions. It was as if he had already made up his mind. He pushed the lightning-shaped necklace toward her, urging the mare to pick it up.

"That is yours, a gift from me to you," he said. "As I said before, you would look beautiful in it."

Rainbow Dash stared at the necklace and felt no incentive to grab it, yet with the urging from Zephyr, she picked it up with her hoof, but she didn't make any attempt to wear it. She looked up at him and was about to speak when another stallion approached the stand.

"Hey, kid, ya make any sells while I was away?" the stallion asked.

Zephyr gave the stallion that fake smile. "Of course, sir," he said. He pointed a hoof to Rainbow Dash and the necklace. "Miss Rainbow Dash made a stunning purchase of that lightning-shaped necklace."

The stallion looks at the mare and grinned widely. "Looks perfect for her!" he shouted with gaiety. "I should've known something like that would catch your eye!" He looks back at Zephyr. "Thanks for watching my stall, kid! You want anything, free of charge?"

Zephyr merely shook his head. "I'm perfectly fine, sir. I'll be leaving now." He exits the stall and approaches Rainbow Dash, using a wing to put the necklace around her neck. "As I expected, it's wonderful on you."

Before Rainbow could reply, Zephyr had begun to leave the marketplace in pursuit of the exit out of Ponyville. She looked at the necklace and gave a long, wistful look before shaking her head and racing to Zephyr's side.

She shouts, "You can't leave! We just have to get you back into the swing of things. We can have you try something else!"

Zephyr was undeterred by Rainbow's rapid pleas. "The wind that blew me wherever it wanted is gone, like my determination," he muttered darkly. As if the effort was too great, Zephyr lowered his head; crestfallen. "I'm tired, Rainbow. I'm exhausted from straining so hard to make something of myself...and failing. I'm so tired."

"And you think going to wherever will somehow fix everything?!" she spat, her pity and sadness making way into anger and frustration. "Galloping off to who knows what won't solve anything! You have to keep trying. You gave so much for mane therapy, and you can do it again. You can rediscover the passion; you can ignite the spark if you just stick with it! I know you can, Zephyr!"

A silent, heavy sigh escaped the stallion's mouth, his eyes glued ahead. "It doesn't work that way," he said, ignoring the veracity and fierceness of Rainbow Dash's words. "We are different ponies, we have different ways of dealing with things, and we know when to give up when the going gets tough. I'm sorry, Rainbow, but I made my decision."

The rainbow mare huffed crossly. "Do you even know what is waiting for you at this place?"

Zephyr nodded. "A place I can head toward being stress-free; where I can find peace somewhere no pony else like you or my sister will be able to head to."

"And why not?!"

"Because you both truly mean something," he answered glumly. "I won't be as missed as you would think."

Anger flared in Rainbow Dash's eyes. "That's not true; don't speak like that! Fluttershy would miss you. Your family would miss you. I would miss you! Have you ever thought about that?!"

There was a tense silence as Rainbow Dash waited for Zephyr's answer with shuddering anticipation. It was quite a surprise that everything she said to the depressed stallion held the merit of truth in every pleading word. She never thought she would care for somepony like him, not in a million years, but here she was, pouring her heart out in an attempt from having Zephyr go somewhere he won't come back from. When she thought about it, she shuddered inwardly at the implications in his forlorn tone, and try as she might to keep herself from thinking about it, the worry of Zephyr doing something dangerous to himself wormed its way in.

"Once," he spoke quietly. He turned his disparaged gaze on the mare, causing her to flinch from the emptiness inside them. "Once I had thought about you and them, but I dismissed it as quickly as it came. All of you will be fine. Fluttershy in particular will recover, in time."

"Zephyr, you don't have to leave forever," Rainbow whispered, placing a wing on Zephyr's withers. He felt tense and she could feel bone. "I can get you a job at the weather factory, or a job maintaining the airspace of Ponyville, or... o-or..."

Zephyr shrugged off Rainbow Dash's wings. If there was a pain in her eyes, he didn't notice. "It's a little too late for that now. I appreciate it, but we all know how that will end." He gave her a smile that caused the mare to look away. "I'm glad we could talk before I go."

Rainbow Dash opened her mouth in another attempt to keep Zephyr from leaving, but she found that no words would come. All of her words, the genuine, heartfelt words she spoke, fell on deaf ears. Nothing was going to change Zephyr's mind; anything she could say, anything that could have been conjured into some words, it wouldn't matter. Zephyr had reflected her pleas like they were nothing.

Did she do something wrong? Had she not said the right words to get him to stay? How could she, the object of Zephyr's desires, the one he flirts with any chance he gets, be swept aside like this? It occurred to Rainbow that anything she could say, anything she could do, anything that could mean something would be pushed away.

She was going to lose Zephyr Breeze. Fluttershy was going to lose a brother and she doesn't even know yet. The rainbow mare halted at the edge of Ponyville. How did she get here so quickly? She and Zephyr were just at the marketplace a few seconds ago! When Rainbow Dash halted, Zephyr kept going, ignorant of her pleas.

"It was nice while it lasted," he called over his shoulder. "Goodbye, Rainbow Dash."

She thought about stopping him by force, but that would only make things worse. Troubled and upset, Rainbow Dash watched in agonizing silence as Zephyr continued to get further away from her. Everything that made Zephyr who he is vanished, leaving nothing but an empty husk of a stallion Rainbow Dash never thought she wanted back.

What would she tell Fluttershy? If she says anything it'll make the yellow mare frantic.

"But...that's what Zephyr wanted, right?" she asked herself, a hoof cradling the necklace with a look of defeat. "He wanted her to know. If she does decide to find him, then I'll help."

Gathering the effort to fly, Rainbow Dash heads off to the cottage of her friend Fluttershy. When she arrived and told the mare what had happened, it was fairly simple what the timid mare might do: find her brother. But, for the second time today, Rainbow Dash was wrong. Fluttershy was in no mood to locate her brother, saying that whatever he is doing, it was his choice.

Rainbow Dash was outraged; she could barely contain her anger at Fluttershy's seemingly dismissive words. How could she not want to find her brother and snap him out of his depression? Her wings flared and with a steely glint in her eyes, Rainbow Dash was going to shout at her friend, but before she could do so, she espied a tiny tremble in the mare's hooves and fought back her shout. Rainbow suddenly felt tired, she sat on her best friend's couch and stared at her with weary eyes.

Fluttershy had her back to Rainbow, her face hidden from view. She was engrossed in the brewing of tea, but the little motions and stutters in her movement caused a shot of worry that pierced the rainbow mare's heart. She was taking the news badly, but not as badly as Rainbow would've thought. It was remarkably quiet, which made Rainbow uneasy since there was some degree of noise whenever she had come over for a visit. There was this aura of despair and misery.

"Did he tell you where he was going?" A voice had called out, meek and quiet but held a tuft of sadness. Fluttershy had spoken.

Rainbow Dash sighed heavily. "No," she answered regretfully. "He...he said it was a place where I couldn't fly to or where you could find him. It's a place we could never hope to go."

"What do you think he meant by that?" Fluttershy asked. Rainbow swore she heard a quiver in her friend's voice.

Rainbow didn't have the energy to shrug. "Don't know, but the way he said it made me feel uneasy," she replied, staring at the necklace hanging from her neck. "All we know is that he is never coming back."

"I see," came Fluttershy's low reply. "Rainbow Dash, I don't think-"

"I know," the rainbow mare said briskly. "We won't find him even if we tried. Fluttershy...I have this feeling that something is going to happen to Zephyr. I don't want to think about it, but I can't get rid of it. I don't know what to do!"

When Rainbow finished, she watched as Fluttershy turned around with her tea kettle in her mouth and some teacups gripped dexterously with one wing. She set them on the table in front of Rainbow, poured herself some tea, and sat beside her. There was a deep, saturated sadness in Fluttershy's eyes, and without thinking, Rainbow Dash wrapped a wing over her friend as she took a teacup in her hooves.

No pony spoke, the only sounds were the occasional ruffling of shifting feathers, the sipping of tea, and the sparse sounds of animal life outside the cottage. The two mares leaned against one another and glanced around the living room in deep requiem of mournful silence. It seemed the two had come to the same conclusion about Zephyr Breeze.