The Equestrian Apocalypse

— Devan —

Luna’s moon reflected brightly on the forest floor. My eyes were fully adjusted to the dark of the night as I sat against the tree, watching and listening for anything. We had settled on splitting the night watch into three shifts between Spark, Flutters, and me to allow Dash and Cloud to rest. Miraculously, Flutters had managed to bring Cloud back to consciousness and slow down the bleeding from her severed hoof. She had awoken an hour later as we continued the walk with her on Spark and Flutters’ backs.

It wasn’t long until we would reach Canterlot, but as day turned to night, we settled on stopping and sleeping in the woods by the tracks. Despite the time crunch of everything going on, we knew it would be best to arrive at Canterlot fully rested. Celestia said it was safe there, and I believed her. Which is why I had trouble sleeping before my middle shift.

I looked at my watch. It was another two hours until I would give up watch to Flutters for the final leg of the night. I debated on just letting her sleep, seeing as I probably wouldn’t sleep well anyway. I turned my head and looked at Cloud. She was lying on her left side next to Flutters, twitching slightly in her sleep. I looked at her bandaged front hoof hanging in front of her chest and bit my lip, looking away as guilt crept back in my conscious. Who am I kidding, it never left.

I shouldn't have stood. Fucking moron. I should have laid down. It should be me without an arm, not her.

These thoughts had spun around in my head the whole night. The hour of sleep I managed to get had offered me nothing but a nightmare. In it, I was stuck in the same damn tunnel and the same damn train light came flying toward me. I had awoken in a cold sweat when the train presumably ran me over, and Spark was there to console me while I faked falling back to sleep. I was glad that Cloud was alive, but I wished things had turned out differently.

I also thought about Pinkie Pie. Thoughts of her chasing me through the Everfree forest filled whatever empty space my mind had left. It was surreal to think about all of the shit that had happened in one day. Sure, I had read and watched books and movies about apocalyptic type events in fiction, but this was insane to actually live through. I was terrified, knowing our end could come in an instant. The time scale seemed completely off with how fast things were happening. I looked up at the moon through the treetops, hoping this all would end just as quickly.

Then I thought about Twilight. While I had made a lot of friends in this wonderful world, Twilight and I had easily become best friends. Most of my time in this world ended up being spent with her over the rest. The lab experiments took up some time, yeah, but we had spent a lot of time just sitting together. Talking. I hoped to Celestia that she was safe, and that maybe she had already made it to Canterlot somehow. The train at the station wasn’t a good sign, but perhaps she had done what we were doing. I hoped she and whoever else was with her had trotted up to the gate of Canterlot already.

I looked back at Cloud, unaware that she had woken up. Her head was still resting on her good front hoof as she stared at me. When she noticed me see her, she awkwardly got up before I could say anything, then used her three good legs to walk over and sit beside me.

“Cloud …” I protested.

“Shut up.”

She smiled at me as she sat by my side. I looked down at my feet. For a minute, I couldn’t speak. Not to her. I was still coming to terms with what had happened, and what I had caused. It was hard to let that guilt go.

“Devan.”

I didn’t respond.

“Devan, look at me. Please?”

After a few moments, I sighed and made eyes with her. “I’m sorry …”

She looked down and grabbed my right hand with her good hoof before looking at me again. “It’s not your fault, Devan.”

I closed my eyes. “It is. I need to accept that.”

She squeezed my hand. “You don’t.”

I opened my eyes. Everything that had happened was coming together, crashing in my head.

“You helped me,” I said, “You saved me. And what do I have to give in return? I make a mistake and get your fucking hoof chopped in half.”

My voice was raising from its whisper. Guilt and anger were attacking my brain.

“Devan …” she pleaded.

"No," I huffed as I stood up. My anger was getting the best of me now. My rant was getting to a volume that could wake the others. I needed a minute to relax, so I started easing my way around the leaves on the ground and walking toward the train tracks. I would still be able to see the others from the edge of the forest, but the openness seemed welcoming to my angry soul. Cloud stubbornly followed me. I turned and looked down at her, continuing my rant.

“The world is going to shit and I have done nothing. Nothing but watch. I'm just a damn spectator at this point. What have I done, really? I couldn’t stop the tunnel incident, I couldn’t put out the train fire, I couldn’t help Dash when she got hurt, I couldn’t help you, I couldn’t find Twilight, and I couldn’t …” I stumbled on my words, “I couldn’t … save Pinkie. I'm ... I'm just a fucking burden!”

“Devan, please ...”

I took a moment to look around and took a deep breath as my emotions stirred. The calming forest nearby swayed with the gentle, nighttime breeze. I sighed, my thoughts collapsing.

"I don’t belong in this world anymore …"

“Devan!!” she half-shouted, careful not to wake the others, “I’m going to cut your arm off if you keep saying crap like that.”

“Then do it. It should have been me, not you.”

She turned, making me think she was going to walk away until she raised her back hooves and bucked my legs hard, causing them to sweep under me as I fell forward to the ground. I rolled over to face the night sky and accepted it, taking in the beauty of Luna’s high moon. It was replaced with Cloud’s head and vibrant blue mane.

“Devan, I get it. You feel guilty. But you have to stop blaming yourself.”

I used my hands and started to lift myself up to retaliate when she hopped her good front hoof on top of my chest to stop me.

“You won’t get anywhere that way. It’s not your fault the world decided to turn itself upside down. You probably aren’t as used to things changing so quickly as we are. I understand. This can be a crazy world. But please keep your head up.”

She took her hoof off and allowed me to sit up. I stared blankly down the tracks, able to see the mountain that Canterlot sat on right ahead of us. I looked back into her eyes.

“Please,” she said, “We need you.”

“But … do you forgive me?”

“I already said it, Devan. It wasn’t your fault. You don’t have to be sorry. Unless you somehow brought the train in there yourself,” she replied, smirking.

“Thank you …”

I wrapped my arms around her in a hug. She hopped her hoof around my back in return. A few tears slowly rolled down my cheeks and onto her back before we disconnected.

“See, now you have do have to apologize, for getting my wings wet. Asshole.”

I smiled, wiping my wet eyes. “Sorry.”

She looked over at the distant city on the mountainside. I stood up and looked alongside her. It was just within our reach, and another half a day of walking would lead us up to those front gates.

“We’re almost there,” I mentioned.

“Oh yeah. I bet I could fly there in fifteen minutes.” She glanced back at her unfunctional wings and shook them. “Little shits.”

“Do they feel any different?” I asked, “Dash and Flutters mentioned it, but didn’t go into detail.”

“Well,” she replied, “They feel a bit numb if that makes sense. I’m a little worried about them to be honest. I hope I can still use them again.”

“I hope so too.”

“It’s funny. I was trotting to get coffee yesterday morning in Ponyville when shit hit the fan. My sister …” she started.

I looked to see her stare off into the mountain.

“She … she’s in Canterlot on vacation. Sorry. I’m sure she’s fine,” she continued, “Anyway, I had thought about flying there myself. Bit of a haul, but I’ve done it before. But as I started flying, my wings just started getting heavier and heavier. Before I knew it, my ass was grass. Thankfully I only really glided down, but this damn ground hurts.” She hopped her hoof on the grass below us.

“So you just gradually lost the ability?”

“Yes.”

“Damn.”

We both spent a minute just taking in the beauty of Canterlot’s mountain. There were some clouds forming around it, as the night sky was growing patchy.

“What do you think is happening at Cloudsdale?” I asked her.

She sighed. “Shit, I don’t know. I really, really hope it’s not what I think.”

“And what is that?”

She locked eyes with me. “Pegasi trying to fly off … now …”

I caught on to what she meant. If they were still able to walk on clouds, many of them might be unaware of their potential inability to fly. If they tried to fly off now, they could sink to a painful death.

“Fuck. Well … you said you glided right?”

“Yes, barely. It took every ounce of energy I had to prevent my wings from falling to my sides. They grew really heavy.”

I could tell she was starting to get a bit emotional as well by her eyes as she looked on at the clouds.

“My mother used to tell me age-old stories,” she said, “A long time ago, before the kinds got along, they used to encounter each other. Sometimes, they would just go on with their business, but sometimes …” She looked down at the ground briefly before continuing. “Sometimes, the pegasi would circle them. The ponies, at least. They would take whatever the ponies had on them, and if they didn’t comply … they would team up and grab them …" Now she was really struggling to get to the end of her story. A tear started falling from her eye. I rested my hand on her shoulder, but she continued. “They would lift them up, really, really high … and drop them …”

Shi-i-i-it.

I had heard about some of Equestria’s history through Twilight and her books, but I could not recall something that brutal. It seemed far-fetched, given how colorful and welcoming this new world was when I first arrived.

“I wonder if this is some kind of twisted way for the world to get … even … I mean, I know that every pony is suffering now, but I can’t imagine Cloudsdale right now.”

“Hey, it’s alright. I’m sure they are using their energy to glide too. Or maybe they found out without plummeting, maybe they are just watching from the cloud tops, waiting …”

“Hopefully.” She looked up, looking partially reassured. “Thanks, asshole.” She awkwardly hoof-bumped my leg with her rear hoof. “You should sleep. My crippled ass can take the rest of your shift.”