Being in a crowd is among my least favorite places to be.
Despite being surrounded by others, it feels so isolating. To everyone else in the room – even someone I’m touching shoulders with – I practically don’t exist. In any other setting, physical contact will always grab your attention, but in a room packed with people, it’s a given. The random intimacy you have with inconsiderate strangers eventually becomes a tactile ambiance.
In this state of existent non-existence, you’re essentially invisible. Even when you’re plowing your way through a room, most people won’t even think twice about someone else nudging them forward. On any other night, I would find this unsettling.
Tonight, however, it's hard to point to which feeling I like less: the feeling of being alone in a crowd, or the omnipresent risk of unintentionally grabbing someone's attention.
In a place like this, you can accidentally gather the attention of any number of people for a multitude of reasons – good or bad. All it takes is one clumsy misstep, a word spoken too loudly, or for anything to happen out of the ordinary for everyone to become aware of your presence. And, given my history, having all eyes fall on me is something that makes my stomach twist.
Unfortunately for me, garnering people's attention was nearly impossible to avoid tonight. At least it wasn't for any negative reasons, but that did nothing to make me feel better about it.
Wading through everyone at this house party was like navigating a minefield. There are so many people I know from CHS, a few from Crystal Prep, and even a few I knew from elsewhere around town. And when you’re someone like me – someone who stands out in a crowd due to my height, the distinct colors of my hair, and, well, the person I am – it’s hard to slip by when people know you and expect to see you.
For a while, every conversation I escaped from only netted me about ten feet of distance before another person recognized me. It’s nice to have people who like me enough to want to talk, but I was starting to get sick of hearing my name coming out of other people’s mouths. There's something far more important that requires my focus, and the constant interruptions were wearing my patience thin.
There was someone I was looking for, but I had no idea where they could be. Knowing so many people meant getting distracted annoyingly often, and every second I wasted conversing with someone who cared a lot more about me than I did them is another second who I’m looking for could be on the move.
Thankfully, I’ve been in enough unwarranted conversations by now to know how to break out of them. Swiftly unraveling myself from the thread of conversation is a skill I’ve mastered. When someone tries to hold my attention for too long, I know just how to distract them and lose myself in the crowd before they have a chance to notice I’m gone. Considering the urgency of my current task, that ability has proven indispensable. Still, even if I knew how to duck away quickly, I had half the mind to start telling people to piss off when they try to grab my attention.
I probably sound needlessly bitter, don’t I? Oh, woe is me, Sunset Shimmer, Miss Popular, having to trudge through a crowd of people who admire and want to talk to me. My life is so hard.
It's easy to look at my situation and think I’m being unnecessarily resentful, and if that’s how it seems to some, then so be it. There were more pressing matters to attend to, and wasting my time laboring over what people who would sooner spit on me than talk to me months ago thought of me wasn’t something I was particularly concerned about.
You see, I didn’t come to this party by myself. I brought someone with me. No, not a date, to my chagrin, but someone of equal – if not greater – importance. And someone who was even less of a party person than I was.
When we arrived, I tried my best to keep her close. At first, it was pretty easy to do, especially considering how close she stuck to me on her own. However, as more and more people arrived, the crowd became more unnavigable, and more people began vying for my attention. Somewhere along the way, we lost each other, and I’d been spending the past fifteen minutes trying to find her again.
Part of what made me so ready to snap at anyone who tried to talk to me was all the guilt piling up. I knew it wasn’t a good idea to bring her along to a place like this. From the start, I knew she wasn’t going to enjoy herself, but I let her tag along anyway, mostly out of selfishness.
As my boots smacked against the sticky linoleum floors of the kitchen, I couldn’t help but think about how viscerally unpleasant this party must be for her. Every room in the house reeked of cigarettes, booze, and body odor. Nearly every room in the house was filled with people shoulder-to-shoulder, wall-to-wall. So many conversations were happening at once, and every single one of them was in a volume competition with each other, and the music blaring throughout the house.
She wasn’t in the kitchen or the hallway close by. The few rooms in the hall that were open only held a few people, and she wasn’t in any of them either. There were only a couple of places left to check: the living room, and the front yard.
I was grateful for the fact that I’d been able to slip by without getting sucked into a conversation for a while, but the fact that it was taking so long to find her was only making me more worried. Since I was her ride, I couldn’t imagine her leaving on her own. But if she was as uncomfortable as I thought, I couldn’t entirely rule that out. Well, I probably could, but I’d rather worry too much than be wrong.
Once I entered the living room, I stood on my toes and scanned the room. If she was standing, she was buried in the crowd, but somehow I figured she wouldn't allow herself to fall into that position. Sharply exhaling in frustration, I made my way toward the front door.
Then I stopped. My heart fluttered. I finally found her. Twilight was sitting in a chair near the entrance of the house.
However, my heart sank as I examined her. She was holding her head in her hands. I knew she wasn’t enjoying herself, but seeing her like that multiplied the guilt I already felt.
After pushing my way through a handful of partygoers between us, I knelt so we’d be at eye level with one another.
“Hey! Sparky!” I shouted over the crowd.
Twilight nearly jumped out of her seat, her wide eyes staring back into mine. When I smiled at her, the tension in her expression quickly dissipated.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you!” Although I had to yell to be heard, I tried my best to keep my tone relaxed. “You doing okay?”
Twilight’s face flushed as she looked away. “Y-Yeah! I’m fine!” She kept her mouth open as if she were about to say something else, but after a few seconds, her lips closed into a weak smile. She was a very bad liar.
“It’s really hot in here!” I remarked, “Why don’t we take a step outside and get some fresh air?!”
Her shaky grin fell through as she knit her brow. “Are you sure? I’m fine as long as you are!”
“Positive!” I grabbed her by the wrist. “Come on! It smells like shit in here anyway!”
If I didn’t pull her away right then, she would probably try to object again. It was clear she was trying to put on a face for my sake, but I wasn’t about to let her do that. I got her into this mess, and I was going to get her out for her sake.
With one hand extended outward and the other wrapped around Twilight’s wrist, I cleared a path through the small number of people between us and the front door. Once we made it outside, the walk from the entrance to where my bike was parked was a breeze. After an hour or so inside, it felt nice to be able to walk unimpeded by others.
When we arrived at my motorcycle, I turned to face Twilight. I was expecting her to look relieved, but instead, she carried that same worried expression from before I pulled her out of the house. Nevertheless, I gave her a smile, albeit a tight-lipped one.
“You’re really not enjoying this, are you?” I asked.
She winced, following it up with a very fake smile. “I am! Really, it’s a blast! It’s just…” the enthusiasm in her voice quickly deflated as she trailed off. When she didn’t continue, the thumping music from inside the house filled the sound gap.
“It’s okay if you’re not,” I assured her. “This doesn’t seem like your kind of deal, and I’m not going to force you to stick around for my sake.
Twilight winced as she stood in place, her body nervously swiveling back and forth. Her gaze began to wander, carefully dodging mine any time our eyes were close to meeting. My heart ached as she silently struggled to figure out what to say to me. I wanted nothing more than to pull her into a tight hug and tell her everything would be okay, but I thought that might just make things more awkward.
Instead, I waved a hand in front of her face. “Uhh, Sparky?”
Her eyes dashed toward mine. There were no words, only a whimper as she blinked hard, causing tears to stream down both of her cheeks. My stomach felt as though a lead weight had been dropped into it.
“Hey hey hey, it’s okay.” Without thinking, I acted on my earlier impulse. Grabbing her shoulders, I pulled her into me and held my arms around her tightly. Twilight choked as she squeezed my waist, burying her face into my chest. It felt wrong, but there was a certain high I felt from holding her like this.
“I-I’m sorry,” she mewled. If I could have hugged her any tighter, I would have.
“There’s nothing to be sorry about, Twilight,” I comforted. “You don’t need to apologize. You haven’t done anything wrong. I’m not upset with you or anything. Just breathe and take it easy. You’re okay, so am I, and everything’s fine, I promise.”
After just a couple of minutes, her whole body began to relax in my embrace. I’d calmed her down from plenty of sudden onset anxiety attacks by this point, but every time still felt like the first. Every time I did it made my heart swell with a wonderful feeling I found impossible to describe.
As much as I wanted our embrace to last, she eventually pulled away. When she did, she looked up at me. Even under the dim light of the night sky, I could still see how puffy and red her eyes were. Somehow, even at her lowest, she managed to look exceedingly adorable.
“I’m not having a good time, no,” she surrendered, wiping her eyes. “The truth is I’ve hated every second of this. The music’s too loud, there are way too many people, and I’m pretty sure there are sewers that don't smell as bad as that house.”
Her candor made it impossible for me not to laugh. “I had a feeling that was the case,” I remarked. “But, why didn’t you say something earlier?”
Twilight’s eyes were fixed on the ground. “At first, when we were together, I thought I could deal with it. Then we got separated, and I found a place to sit, hoping you'd find me. Then I got into my own head about everything, and it all got to be too much." She let out an empty laugh. "I’m sorry I'm like this.”
“Hey!” I blurted out. “What did I just say? No apologies.” I smirked at her. “In fact, you’re banned from making any more the rest of the night. Besides, I like that you're 'like this' – whatever that may entail.”
She looked up at me with the first genuine smile I’d seen on her face all night. I returned the gesture. “Honestly, Twilight, I probably shouldn’t have let you come along. I know you were pretty adamant about coming with me, but I knew you weren’t going to like it. I guess I didn’t say anything because, well…”
My voice trailed off and my heart began to race. I felt as though I should finally spill my guts out – let Twilight know how I really feel about her – but was this the right time?
Half of me was screaming yes. This was the perfect opportunity to tell her how I felt. The whole reason I agreed to bring her with me to this party was that if I hadn’t, we wouldn’t get to spend the weekend together like we usually did. And the whole reason I wanted to spend so much time with her was because of how I felt.
But how would that make me look?
Hey, the whole reason I brought you here, to this place I knew you’d hate, was because I’m actually in love with you and want to spend all my time with you! That’s why, halfway through the night, I abandoned you for an indeterminate amount of time! You know, which is part of why you got anxious to the point of tears not even five minutes ago! Don’t I just sound like the best girlfriend? Wouldn't you love to date someone so negligent and inconsiderate? All this and less, but only if you say yes!
As much as I wanted to finally let it out, I had talked myself out of it once more. It just wasn’t the right time. If I told her now, it could ruin our friendship. That wasn’t a risk worth taking.
Besides, I couldn’t think about it for very long. I was just standing in front of her looking like an idiot. I had to say something before I worried her even more.
“Well, I just like spending time with you.” I let out a deep exhale. Without realizing it, I’d been holding my breath while I was standing there thinking.
Twilight grinned wide. “I-I really like spending time with you too.” She looked away, curling a tuft of her hair hanging in front of her ear with her finger. “If it means we get to spend a little more time together, I can stick it out a little longer,” she bashfully suggested.
By this point, I’m sure I wanted to get away from that party just as much as she did. Coming here was a bad idea, and the sooner we could physically and mentally put this place behind us, the better. Instead of answering right away, I pensively grabbed my chin and looked up at the night sky. It was a new moon, but the lights from the city nearby drowned out the stars above. That’s when I got an idea.
“Tell you what,” I replied, “How about we go for a ride?”
Immediately, Twilight looked worried. “It’s fine, really! You don’t have to take me home yet.”
Shaking my head, I reached out and mussed her hair. “I’m not taking you home yet, nerd,” I teased. “There’s a spot on the outskirts of town not far from here that I think you'd like. The light pollution’s not that bad, so on a night like this, you can see a lot of stars.”
“I'll admit, that does sound nice. Especially compared to being here." She was trying not to show her eagerness, but Twilight’s face lit up as she smiled. I couldn’t help but grin just as wide. I knew the promise of a clear night sky would entice her, and even if she was trying not to show it, her excitement at the idea still made my heart jump.
Without another word, I grabbed her helmet and passed it to her. “Thought you might be into that,” I remarked with a wink. She tried to hide it, but I could see her blush. My heart felt like it could burst. It was not built to withstand such adorability, yet it somehow did.
The ride there was mostly uneventful. That said, it was still a challenge to keep my attention on the road for a variety of reasons. Even though Twilight had ridden with me a handful of times by this point, she still held a death grip on my waist from the backseat. That wasn’t an issue, though. If anything, the only reason it was such a distraction was because of how cute I found it.
What occupied my mind most of all was realizing just how ‘romantic’ of a setting our destination was. There was a clearing about as big as a football field was off the side of a nearby highway. And while there wasn’t much in it other than some shrubbery and short trees, it led to a fenced-off cliff face that overlooked a much bigger forest, and was a nice vista for stargazing.
That’s where we were headed. Together, in the middle of the night, just me and her. Perhaps not the most traditionally romantic place, but to me, a spot like that was as intimate as it got. And considering the view of the night sky, I couldn't imagine Twilight felt that differently.
When I had the idea, I hadn’t even thought of how it could be interpreted as a romantic rendezvous, but now my mind was unable to fixate on anything else. Maybe it wasn’t the right time to admit how I felt before we left the party, but this seemed like the perfect time and place to do so. I couldn’t help but feel like I’d unintentionally set myself up to finally confess to Twilight. It was as if my subconscious had gotten tired of waiting for me to finally nut up and do it.
Before I knew it, we were pulling off the side of the road into the front of the clearing. The only thing that lit the path ahead was my bike’s headlight. As I released the clutch, the light powered off and the darkness of night shrouded the way forward once more.
We both stepped off the bike, putting our helmets away into the saddlebags. Before I approached the clearing, I looked back at Twilight who seemed slightly apprehensive about stepping into the dark unknown.
“Don’t worry. It might look a little intimidating from this angle, but I promise there’s nothing in there,” I offered. She gave a weak smile and followed close behind.
Taking my phone out of my jacket pocket, I clicked the flashlight on and guided us through the tall grass and shrubs. Twilight stood very close behind me the whole way as if she was afraid she’d lose me as she did at the party. I made sure to keep my pace a little slow. Half because I could tell she was a little anxious, but also because it was endearing how close she insisted on being.
Eventually, we reached the chain-link fence before the cliff overlooking the dense forest below. Just as I had mentioned, the stars were more visible than anywhere in the city. This was helped by the fact that the moon was completely invisible.
Looking over at Twilight, I couldn’t help but smile wide. It was so dark, but I could see her eyes light up as she took in the billions of stars that dotted the night sky.
“Gosh, this is amazing!” she exclaimed. “How did you find this place?”
“Before we met, there was a spot I’d go to be alone not far from my apartment,” I answered. “They started developing that area, though, so I had to look for a replacement. I found this place not long after, but I’ve only been here a couple of times because of how far away it is.”
“Why?” she asked.
Looking up at the sky, I shrugged. “It’s a nice spot, but it’s on a side of town I don’t usually find myself in. It’s much easier to get here from the house we just left than it is from your house or my apartment.”
Twilight nodded and looked up at the stars herself. It didn’t take long for her to start info-dumping afterward. She pointed out all the constellations she could identify, naming each star they were made of and listing the magnitude of each one.
I couldn't internalize anything she was telling me not because I didn’t care, and not because I couldn’t understand it, but because I was so distracted.
When we first met, Twilight was so shy and reserved. She was constantly afraid of being annoying or overwhelming. When she got excited about something, she’d quickly shoot herself down before she could really get going, and every time she did, it would make my heart hurt. There were so many different things she was passionate about, but it was clear she was used to her interests being disregarded due to how most others found them too boring or complicated.
My mind’s plasticity was a point of pride, but more often than not, she was too fast for me to keep up with. That never stopped me from encouraging her, though. It didn’t matter whether or not I could wrap my head around what she was talking about, I always wanted to hear more.
Seeing her express her fervent admiration of things – regardless of my ability to keep up – filled me with joy like nothing else. Even better was that I could tell how happy it made her to have someone she could gush to worry-free. And the best part? She was just so fucking adorable when she did it.
After a while, her seemingly infinite well of astronomical facts ran dry, and the only sounds that could be heard were the crickets in the grass and the frogs in the trees. Both of us were content to sit there and stare at the sky silently.
Of course, my idle mind began to wander, and as my pulse began to accelerate, so did my thoughts. This was it. This was the perfect moment, and all I had to do was think of the right thing to say, and the right way to say it.
Before I could give that much thought, however, she broke the silence on her own.
“I’m really sorry about taking you away from the party.”
Looking over at her with a playful glare, I gently slapped the top of her head which amounted more to a pat than it did a strike. “What did I tell you about apologizing?”
She giggled, fidgeting in place. “I know, but… I still feel really bad about it. You were having fun, and now you’re having to accommodate me. Again. Like always.” Her voice began with a tinge of melancholy, increasing with every syllable that left her mouth.
“Just because it looked like I was having fun doesn’t mean I actually was.” Turning to the side, I leaned against one of the iron fence posts with my shoulder. “I may not be the bitch I used to be, but I still know how to put on a convincing face when I need to.”
Twilight looked confused. “I don’t understand, though. It seemed like everyone wanted to get your attention, and before we got separated it looked like you were having a blast.”
Shaking my head, I scoffed. “Yeah, what’s more fun than a party where half the people there are people I don’t know, and the other half are people who want to pretend they know me,” I sarcastically remarked. “Most of the people who wanted to talk to me weren’t exactly what I would call friends.”
Tilting her head, Twilight’s brow furrowed. “Why?”
“It’s kinda complicated.” My head turned toward the sky again. “For a while – well before you came along – I was pretty unpopular. You know the whole demon thing? That was why.
“If I didn’t run between classes, I’d get glared at. Sometimes other students would start cowering the moment they saw me. Some of them would “accidentally” push me into lockers, that kind of shit. Then everything with The Dazzlings and the battle of the bands happened, and suddenly, everyone wants to be friends with me.”
“I guess that makes sense,” Twilight agreed. “I mean, from what I know, you pretty much single-handedly saved the day.”
Cocking my head to the side, I gave a tight-lipped smile. “I wouldn’t say ‘single-handedly,’ but if that’s how others tend to see it, who am I to argue?” Twilight giggled as I paused before continuing.
“But anyway, overnight, everything changed. The next day at school, there was no one staring daggers at me. I still had to run between classes, but it was only because people wouldn’t stop trying to talk to me. Everyone wanted to be my friend, and out of all the problems I’ve had, that sounds like the best one ever, right?”
“But it felt fake, didn’t it?” Twilight asked. “It’s not the same, but that’s kind of how it felt when I transferred from Crystal Prep. Everyone acted like they knew me.” She looked away for a moment. “Which, I guess makes more sense considering they all knew someone who looked exactly like me.” When our eyes met again, Twilight smiled sheepishly. “N-Not to make this about me or anything!”
“No, you’re pretty much exactly right. As always, you get me.” I smiled at her and her expression relaxed.
Turning my head back toward the sky, I continued. “Truth be told, I was getting tired of being at that party. I may look like a people person, but I’m not”.
Twilight chuckled. “Well, technically you’re not really a person either.”
Pursing my lips, I playfully glared at her. “Wow! Rude!”
My expression and tone must not have conveyed I was joking because Twilight immediately looked nervous. “O-Oh, gosh, I’m sorry I didn’t–”
Letting my face fall back into a smile, I patted her on the head again. “How many times do we have to go over this?”
She relaxed, both of us laughing as my hand gently touched the top of her head.
“But, yeah, I just know how to maintain the appearance of a people person. I was mostly there on another friend’s behalf, but I would have probably split early even if I was on my own.”
“I guess that makes me feel a little better,” she responded. Her words went a long way toward alleviating the guilt I still felt about dragging her out to that party.
“Trust me, if it’s a choice between being trapped at a house party surrounded by others I don’t give much of a shit about, or spending a quiet night alone with you… well, the fact that we’re out here now should tell you my choice.” I turned to her with a smile.
She smiled back at me. Our eyes remained locked on each other. Once again, my heart rate began to increase rapidly. I may have missed two good opportunities so far, but this one was perfect. Tonight had nearly veered into disaster, but I had salvaged it, and all I had to do was give that cheesy thing I said an appropriate amount of time to sink in. Then, I could follow it up by finally confessing.
Turning my body toward the forest, I looked up at the night sky once more. I retreated into my head to try and think of the perfect way to express how I felt. A billion words flashed through my head all at once, and as each sentence appeared in my mind’s eye, none of them felt appropriate. They were too blunt or too subtle. Too corny or too insincere. Too succinct or too wordy.
It was rarely ever difficult for me to force words out. Even if my brain couldn’t formulate something solid, I could usually impulsively let something out and use that as a springboard. But this was different. What I was going to admit to her had the potential to change everything between us.
The most likely scenario in my mind was that she’d say she doesn’t feel the same way, and we’d go on being friends like nothing happened. That didn’t mean I wasn’t running the risk of her reacting to my confession poorly. That didn’t mean my admission couldn’t permanently damage our friendship.
What other option was there? Was I just going to sit around until someone else came along and swept her off her feet? Twilight didn’t seem like the type to date around, but that didn’t mean there wouldn’t eventually be someone that caught her eye. The longer I waited, the more likely it was that would come to pass.
“Hey, Twilight?” I forced the words out of my mouth. “I wanted to ask you something.”
I could hear her turn her attention toward me, but I didn’t turn to face her. Instead, my gaze was locked on the sky above. My stomach was already twisting itself in knots, and I’m sure looking at her would only cause it to wrench even harder.
“What is it?” she asked.
Gulping nervously, I stayed looking ahead. My body began to heat up, and I became so hyper-aware of all my senses that I could feel the droplets of sweat bead on my brow. “Umm… This might be a really weird question to ask, but…”
There it was. My foot was in the door. This was the furthest I’d ever made it in asking this question. I was finally committed. There was no turning back now. I had her attention, I was set up to ask the question, and all I had to do was ask her how she feels about me. Depending on her answer, we would take it from there.
As subtle as I could, I licked my lips. My mouth was bone dry, and my throat was closing up. I felt so stupid. All I had to do was ask if she liked me. That was it. It was so easy. I was so worried, but for what? The minuscule chance that she reacts poorly and decides not to be my friend anymore? Is that really all that was holding me back?
It was now or never. Do or die. I had to get this out there. If I didn’t, I may never have another chance to do so. That’s a regret I would have to carry with me for the rest of my life. This was my chance, and I had to make the most of it.
“I, umm… well…” I stammered. “… I think I left my phone at the party. Could you tell me what time it is?”
Fuckinghorsefeathers.
My brain scrambled to come up with something to say. In doing so, I uttered the stupidest excuse for a question I could. Not only was it dumb, but it was also completely false. I could only hope she didn’t notice I was lying about not having my phone.
It was hard to pinpoint exactly what I was feeling after that. I could feel my entire body decompress at once, but it didn’t feel like a relief. Instead, it was as if I was hollowing out completely. Frustration, anger, and disappointment made themselves at home in the vacuum left by my inner tension.
As I turned to finally face Twilight, she looked visibly confused. She still fished her phone out of her pocket, however. “It’s 9:21,” she answered.
I nodded and smiled the most empty smile I’d ever mustered. “Thanks. You want to get going soon?”
“Not yet,” she responded. “At least, not unless you want to.”
I shook my head. “I could spend all night out here with you.”
Twilight’s cheeks flushed as she looked away from me. I smiled again, but once again the expression was mirthless. If anything, I felt more regret than before. She always reacted so well when I said corny things like that, yet I still couldn't tell her how I felt. I felt completely and utterly hopeless.
It was hard to tell whether the negativity I felt was easing up, or if I was just growing used to it. Over the next half hour, we just sat there staring up at the sky, occasionally breaking the silence by exchanging a sentence or two.
Grabbing my phone, I pulled it out of my jacket pocket to check the time. “It’s about ten now,” I remarked. “I should probably bring you home before your parents flip out.”
“Yeah, I guess so,” Twilight responded. “Thanks for bringing me.”
I smiled at her. “Thanks for coming with me.” My eyes darted away as my brow knit. “And… sorry for bringing you to that shitty party.”
Twilight gently tapped me on the head with her palm. “If I’m not allowed to apologize, then you’re not either.”
With a giggle, I tousled her hair. “Do as I say, not as I do.”
We both laughed as we made our way back to the bike. A minute of walking later, we both stood before the motorcycle. As I grabbed our helmets, I noticed Twilight had stopped a few feet away from me.
“Before we go,” Twilight began, “Do you mind if I ask you something?”
Shit.
It was then I realized I pulled out my phone to check the time not too long ago. She must have seen me do it. Or maybe she remembered when I used the flashlight when we got here. Either way, I had probably been exposed. She was probably about to ask me if I was really wondering what time it was.
A lump formed in my throat. “Yeah?” I responded, swallowing a moment after.
The seconds dragged on like hours as she stood a few feet away. I tried my best to look normal on the outside, but there were thousands of alarms going off inside my head. If I was caught, I had no more excuses. I would have to tell the truth. This was going to happen now whether I wanted to or not.
“Actually… it’s not really a question,” she answered. “I just wanted to say you’re the best friend I could have ever asked for.”
For the second time that night, my body began to decompress. This time it felt relieving, but it was still tainted by a noticeable feeling of disappointment. Part of me wanted to be caught. At least then, I’d be forced to get my feelings out in the open instead of keeping them bottled up.
If nothing else, her words made me feel good. In time, there would be other opportunities for a confession. For now – for tonight – I was just glad we were close. We were friends, and at the end of the day, I could be happy with that. For now, at least.
With a grin, I tossed her helmet to her. “You too, Sparky.”
Author's Note
Surprise! I wrote this one some time back in November after being overtaken by a insatiable craving to write gay pining, but never edited it after it was done. Today, I decided to give it a little polish and post it up. Not my best work, but I hope you enjoy regardless!
If you want to know whether these two ever end up together, there's a whole story I wrote about it here.
Regardless, thanks for reading! 
