Author's Note
This is just something I thought of the otherday watching a few cowboy movies and listening to a couple country songs.
Warning its a comedy. My first take on a more comidic story. I as the author am not gonna take this story all that seriously. Get ready for a lot of bad puns.
I guess I was a little inspierd by the movies Tomb Stone, Shanghai Noon, and the song I AM THE RIGHTEOUS HAND OF GOD.
CHAPTER 1 humble begings
An orange mare with hair like strands of hay was running like the wind trying to catch up to a train when she encountered a large cliff. She stops just in time before she nearly falls off of it. . She raises her head. As she looks off into the distance. A roaring, large black train was running down the track just up ahead of her. She had blue overalls and a dirty white shirt on from working the barn from her home. A brown cowboy hat on, and a gun holster to her waist.
She squinted her green eyes as she could feel the ground rumble from the engine. As she took out her colt and examine the barrel. It only had one built left. She quickly set it back in her holster.
"Dog gone." She muttered.
Just then she heard the heavy breathing of her travel companion just behind her. She turned to the buttercream mare. She wore a simple tan out fit. Her hair pink as can be. She gasped as she tried to catch her breath. A little feather crown on her head.
"ja …" she breathed." Jackey. You can't… you can't be… be serious about this."
"Really. Look at what that's varmint done did to us! Look at what he's done to you! She barked."
"But i…"
"You still think he's a friend. He's trying to steal a train right now and I'm a gonna stop him with or with out cha. "
The mare caught her breath finally. "Ok, but how are we going to catch the train."
"Easy, well jump from here when the train passes." Jacky smirked.
The yellow mare yelped a little at her response. "But, but."
"But nothing." She retorted.
"But i… I'm afraid of hights."
Jackey rolled her eyes. "Of course the one Pegasus I get stuck with is afraid of hights." She muttered. As the Pegasus shook in fear. "Listen Flutters. Think of him. Think of everything he's done to us. To this land. Are ya really gonna let him get away with that."
The Pegasus stopped shaking at the thought of him. She greeted her teeth at the thought. "That no good, big oh, Meanie." She steamed as she breathed through her nose.
"That's it, that's it, get peeved." Jacky said, looking back at the oncoming train.
"Now on my mark…" she began only for the pegasus to run right into her making them both fall off the cliff. She raised her wings and tried to slow down their fall as they both screamed. Luckily for them, the train caught up to them, and they smashed right into the black coal.
While flutters coughed and sat there welling in pain from the fall, Jackey spent no time getting up and getting to her gun. "Hold it right there!" She yelled to the driver of the train. He looked like a tall black shadow against the roaring fire of the engine. A tall black ten-gallon hat. And a cape that flowed down his back. The creature stopped shoveling coal. But he did not turn around or freeze at the sound of their arrival.
The yellow pegasus shook the pain out of her head. But couldn't get rid of the pain in her heart. Tears welled up in her eyes.
How could you? She demanded.
"You.,you were the one behind it all, weren't you. You were the one who." Jackey started shaking as her own eyes began to water. "Who killed them, weren't you!? "
The creature said nothing. He stood with his back turned to the two of them.
"WEREN'T YOU?!" Jackey cried.
He gave no answer as he crossed his arms.
"How? How could it of come to this?" Flutershy sniffled.
Suddenly, playful giggling could be heard out of nowhere. The three turned their heads to see a pink mare with Curley hair pop her head out of the pile of coal. Standing in a purple dress with a fortune teller cap on, caring a hawk skull.
"PINKIE!" The three shouted in unison.
"Oh, come on, you all know how this came to be don't ya? Hmm, what's that skully?" She said as she put an ear to the bird skull. "Huh," she gasped. "You're right. They haven't heard it at all, have they". She said, pointing to seemingly nowhere.
"Well here we go. I'll be your narrator for this one. And we'll call it. Hmm. Oh, oh, I know. "
WILD WEST
Ok, let's see chapter one. Humble begins. It all started a few decades back. With the expansion of Equrestriah. There were lots and lots of different kinda people. There were the dragons, the griffins, the minotaurs, and so many more all traveling to a new land. Because of so many new pilgrims in the growing country people, it leads people to travel west of the horseyzippy river. Far away from mainhatten.
Especially once people found jewels in the Rocky Mountains. People started traveling there as fast as they could to get rich. Thus, the properly named jewel rush was begun. To help with the jewel rush, a contraption was built to connect the far western towns to mainhattien. The contraption was called a train. And that was the birth of the rail-road.
Along the railroad in the far west was a brand-new little town just being put together called Dirt Vill. Letter to be renamed Ponyville after this story Dirt vill was full of, well, dirt. Very, very good and healthy dirt. This dirt was so good that lots and lots of pilgrims came and began to settle in and make farms on the land. Turning the WILD WEST into their home. Problem was, WILD WEST was just that wild. It was a dangerous time to be out there in the middle of nowhere. It was a lawless place. To add some kinda sense of normalcy, the citizens of dirt vill decided they needed a law man. And so they made their first sheriff, Bright Mac, who just move his little family there to start a new. It was him his mom, his wife, and his wife's sister Cherry Jubilee… After a few years of growing apple trees and raising a little family. Bright Mac thought nothing could go wrong in his little town of dirt vill.
Welp we know that ain't gonna make a good story.
Like I said, it was a dangerous back water word out in the old WILD WEST. a group of well known criminals started running around steeling jewels and shooting up town. There were known as. The red bandits. Why? Cause there we're always wearing red bandits over their faces, duh.
Let's see, there where. Hmm, if i remember correctly. Five in total. There was the little pegasus. Crazy Cozy Glow. Nothing cozy about her. Blue curled hair and light pink fur. Always dressed up like a little princess. So cute till you cross her. Then she pulled out a pistol on ya. She kinda had a bad temper.
"I do not! Cozy glow yelled on screen. "
The old centaur Tirek. Wore a black cloak, had red fur, black horns and a nose ring. Had a lot of daddy issues.
"I do not. Tirek yelled on screen."
Then there was the Terrible Tempest.
(Tirek) "hay, why does she get a cool name and I don't?"
She’s a dark purple unicorn with a broken horn, pink hair, and black western shirt and paints. Don't underestimate her. She's one of the quickest draws in the west.
And the gentleman Sombra. Always dressed in his Saturday best, clean white shirt black paints and western boots, caring a red rose. Sombra was a unicorn that only acted nice. Don't be tricked by good looks. He kill ya in a heartbeat if ya double cross him.
Finally, there was, the worst of them all. The leader of the gain. He put together this team of bandits for one reason and one reason only. To take what he considered his and no one else's.
On their journey ransacking town after town and stealing jewel after jewel, they came across little ol dirt vill. Hearing about the new so-called law man. To teach this law man a lesson, they ruin the town in the dead of night. When Bright Mac tried to stop them, he was gunned down by the leader himself. His wife tried to save him only to get caught up in the middle of the battle, leaving their family with no parents. Few years later, the boss was caught and tossed in the big pen. And this is where our story begins.